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Evolve or Repeat
Join Liv and Shelby, two midwest twenty-somethings, as they take you along their own personal growth journeys and what it means to truly pour into yourself as a young adult.
Evolve or Repeat
17. Spring Cleaning Your Life
There's something magical about throwing open windows after a long winter, letting fresh air flow through your home as you scrub away dust and clutter. But what if that same revitalizing energy could transform every corner of your existence?
In this episode, we dive deep into the concept of life-wide spring cleaning – a comprehensive reset that goes far beyond organizing your closets. We explore seven key areas that deserve attention: physical spaces, mental clutter, overwhelming schedules, outdated goals, draining relationships, digital habits, and wellness approaches. Each represents a dimension of life where winter's heaviness might still linger, preventing you from fully stepping into spring's potential.
Have you ever noticed how your physical environment mirrors your mental state? We certainly have. We share practical strategies for decluttering both your home and mind, including the powerful practice of "brain dumping" that literally transfers swirling thoughts from your head onto paper. We also examine how our society fails to prepare us for creating personal structure – making our twenties particularly challenging as we build systems from scratch.
The most surprising revelation? The average person spends 6-8 hours daily on their phone – essentially a full workday! This digital consumption fundamentally changes how we experience reality. We offer actionable boundaries to reclaim this time while still staying connected to what matters.
Whether you're feeling stagnant, overwhelmed, or simply ready for renewal, this episode provides the framework for a total life refresh. Because true spring cleaning isn't just about sparkling surfaces – it's about creating space for what genuinely matters in the season ahead.
Ready to open all your windows and let the fresh air flow through? Listen now, then let us know which area of your life needs the biggest spring cleaning this year!
Follow the Podcast: @evolveorrepeat.thepodcast
Follow Liv: @livwerth @livedin.studio
Follow Shelby: @the.shelbylenae
Hey, we're Liv and Shelby and we're two Midwest 20-somethings fascinated with all things personal growth, healing and evolving into the best version of yourself possible.
Speaker 2:Over the last four years, we've gone from lost, sad and broke to secure, confident, abundant and full of purpose. Now we're inviting you along our journey, too.
Speaker 1:We teach you everything we've learned thus far and the secrets to building a life you truly love.
Speaker 2:Think it's all rainbows and butterflies. Think again to building a life you truly love. Think it's all rainbows and butterflies. Think again. Friendships, social media relationships and navigating a self-growth journey are all topics we dive into.
Speaker 1:Think of this as a 2 am conversation with your best friend, mixed with the hard truths and obstacles needed to level up.
Speaker 2:So grab your favorite emotional support drink, make sure you're comfy and get ready to challenge your limiting beliefs that you didn't even know you had. This is Evolve or Repeat.
Speaker 1:Well, ladies and gentlemen, this unfortunately is our second attempt. If you're following us on Instagram, you probably saw our Instagram story that we tried recording this a little bit earlier today and unfortunately, the batteries died in our new recorder only 14 minutes in thank god, I noticed yep 40 minutes after. Yeah, I have it's all right.
Speaker 1:At least you noticed before we were done, thought we were all accomplished and realized that it was over but, guys, we were having such a good conversation so we're hoping to bring that the heat this second time around well, we are learning things about our new podcast recorder one is that I need a giant pack of double a batteries and they need to be replaced every time before we record, just in case, because I cannot believe that we used up the juice of two new batteries for one episode did we really talk that much we must? I mean, it is kind of a long episode it is. If you guys haven't heard it, it's definitely a good one Go listen to it.
Speaker 2:I think we chatted for like an hour, so that does make sense. Yes, but we know how to face adversity. Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 1:The world just wasn't ready for what was coming for it, and exactly that's all right.
Speaker 2:It's testing to make sure we're really committed to this.
Speaker 1:It is and we are yes, this time, we are not giving up no, we're like we are.
Speaker 2:We're committing energy and we are finishing this.
Speaker 1:We felt good we're staying here and we're, and we're doing it. Yes, um, do you know where we were at? I feel like we can just probably just start over because all like all the way over yeah oh yeah, the audio was bad. Yeah, that too. Like I think it was also the universe telling us the audio was off, because I think the two dials on the recorder for our microphones were set at like different volumes, so Liv sounded like way louder than I did, way louder I sound like I was like underwater.
Speaker 2:So it was meant to be, but you guys are here for the journey.
Speaker 1:You're along with us. You can say that you're one of the OGs. We've become rich in fame, but we're so excited about today's topic. I mean, I feel like in the first time that we recorded this, we gave like a quick little life update, but both Liv and I are in the process of moving. Yeah, we're always aligned.
Speaker 2:I know we are always aligned.
Speaker 1:Which is crazy. But today or I guess, yeah, it was today because it was earlier this morning was daylight savings time, so we lost an hour. I woke up like in the middle of the night and my hatch alarm clock said 5 am and then like walked out into my kitchen to like get a drink of water and it was said 4 am and I about lost my shit. I was like what is going?
Speaker 2:on wait. What is it? It was daylight savings time but it's spring, so it's basically summer. Spring has sprung and it's literally almost like 60 degrees outside right now, so it actually feels like summer which is insane.
Speaker 1:Yeah, tyler wore shorts to like golfing today and I was like you're on crack, but like also, I get it like I totally understand yeah, it's the same energy.
Speaker 2:The sun is out and now it's gonna be out later. I've been like counting down the days for daylight savings. I know it's always kind of hard when you're like losing an hour, but it's always worth it. Oh yeah, in the end.
Speaker 1:I mean, we were definitely going to record this podcast like at noon, and then Liv showed up at like 1.30 because, like, we both needed like extra time to like decompress and like wake up. Yeah, our bodies adjust, which fair, but now it's going to be light out until almost 8 pm. Yeah, now it's 4 o'clock, thank God. Um, so we've been here for a little bit three hours. Yeah, we ordered some salads from forage to fuel our bodies and give us some more energy and motivation to to keep going. But sponsor us, yes, yeah, we're also just really excited about this episode and we feel like it's very timely considering we're stepping into spring. There's new energy, like we were talking about, too, the. I feel like everybody knows the feeling of what it's like to do like a spring cleaning where, like you have all the windows, open windows, the fresh air there's nothing better the smell cleaning supplies wafting the curtains, flowing in the wind.
Speaker 1:Everybody knows that feeling um, I that was going to be me for today honestly still can be. I still can you have time gather back the day. I've lost a couple hours due to some technical difficulties, but it's all right. But spring cleaning I feel like a lot of people like, when you think of spring cleaning, of course, like you think of decluttering, like your physical space and you know, getting in the nooks and crannies, like getting on your hands and knees and like scrubbing the cracks of the floors and all the things. But there's also like so many other ways to spring clean that don't have to do with like your physical space, like like your mental space, um, when it comes to like your physical, your emotional wellbeing, like dealing with relationships, all the things where, uh, we just wanted to get into like different areas of your life that you can spring clean, and like how to do that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and first things first is decluttering baby.
Speaker 1:well, that is definitely where you need to start. That's like one of the most important things about which with us moving.
Speaker 2:I we started packing last weekend. For once, we're actually packing early we're always like last minute people normally, but we started early and I was decluttering the shit out of our apartment and it felt so good to just get rid of things that we don't use anymore or like donate things. We donated so many things to saint minnie's um, and if it's just sitting there and causing clutter, you just get rid of it and it's like you're getting rid of like negative energy.
Speaker 1:Honestly, at the same time, too, that's what it feels like well, and I think a lot of the things that, like we talked about too when it came to decluttering, is like your space reflects, like your, your mental state too, and like, yes, if your space is cluttered and you have like a lot of stuff, just like taking up space like it's just gonna overwhelm you, where I feel like, if you do yourself like the due diligence to like go through, like the bathroom cabinets every now and again and like take things out, like for us it's extremely convenient that we're moving at around this time, um, for us to do this, but even if you're not switching spaces, like pick one space at a time to dive into, that you know you've been neglecting. For me, it's like my bathroom cabinets. I have acrylic organizers but like the, the organizers themselves are so messy like a bunch of shit is just like thrown inside of them, but as long as it's in like a bin like I'm like okay I feel fine about it, but like it's not.
Speaker 2:I actually did that last weekend and I did not realize how horrible my bathroom cabinets were. I was like why, like, do I have so many things like expired product freaking like just random ass shit? I'm like where did this come from? So it's nice to declutter that space. I feel like my bathroom is also my issue as well.
Speaker 1:And I feel like I should probably explain to like why I'm moving. Like, first and foremost, like our lease at the place that we're currently at is up at the end of April, we've been looking at buying a house, but the market right now is just so bad like. It's so bad where, like, we have seven weeks left and I know it takes like a couple weeks to close on a house, so within like the next couple weeks, we would have had to like a like have found a house that like we like, which there's not even that many houses on the market isn't, which is surprising because we are entering spring and I feel like I know more will come on the market.
Speaker 2:But, like I feel like normally at this point, there's like a lot, I know there's not we just needed to buy ourselves more time.
Speaker 1:So, long story short, there's a sublet in our building that's actually been like available for quite some time. I was seeing their posts, I think, like back in april or not april jesus shelby, like september october, um, in the elevators and like they could just never find somebody. But the guy that was subletting this place like saw a bunch of like the new units go on the market, so he slipped a piece of paper under everybody's door and I saw it and I was like, oh my God, this is perfect. So yeah, long story short, we're signing this sublet. It's going to start May 1st and go all the way through the end of August.
Speaker 1:It's one of the penthouses, so it's so nice, like it's gorgeous, and they drop the rent $500 a month, so it makes it like the same price that we're paying now, which is crazy, which we're not going to have to pay more, but now, like, because the sublet's available, there's like nothing in this apartment building we're able to like start moving our stuff in and it's literally just down the hall. So I think like this is going to be so great for me, especially hall. So I think like this is going to be so great for me especially like to declutter my own space because I'm only taking like I'm going to do this slowly and I'm only going to take stuff over there that I know that I use or I will use, and then I'll just be able to get rid of everything else which is so great.
Speaker 2:It'll be so much easier when you move into a house, because then you'll already have like decluttered everything and like have what you need.
Speaker 1:I feel like it was supposed to happen this way honestly because I was getting so anxious about the house buying process just already. I mean, you're buying a house. It's crazy, it's a ginormous liability, like with all the things that could go wrong.
Speaker 2:It just it scares me so much. You're ever going to spend something, most likely so you have to make sure that you're like getting the right place at the right time.
Speaker 1:And I'm probably most likely I hope we'll get engaged soon and then we'll be getting married and then we're going to have our first kid. Like I think our goal is to like have our first child in our first home, like kind of how my parents did, and then when I was like two or three years old, like before I was entering kindergarten, that's when they kind of picked the area they wanted to live in as far as like schooling wise, and obviously you'll have more money and like more life established at that point to be able to invest more into a home. But like this is our first home, like I want to make sure, like it's a good space.
Speaker 1:Oh for sure, anyway, tangent that's kind of where I'm. Geez words, that's kind of where I'm well geez words, that's kind of where life is, is taking me right now. But I think, like live said, just decluttering and like focusing on, I think, one area at a time is so crucial too, because it's so easy to get distracted and overwhelmed when you're cleaning dude, my adhd, can't?
Speaker 2:I literally have to make a list for myself, because I will be like starting one thing and I'm like, oh, should I need to go over here, and then I'll start that, and then like I'll have five different messes that I've started to try to clean, yeah. And literally not one of them is finished.
Speaker 1:They're like all half assed, and then I am depressed, and then I just you throw a pull back in the cabinets and you're like I'll try again another day. No, exactly but yeah, obviously you're not going to deep clean your entire apartment in one day, like you just do not have enough time or energy for that. I used to think I could do that, and then I was super woman and then I realized I was actually clinically insane.
Speaker 1:So, actually having grace and, you know, give yourself like some time.
Speaker 1:Like with this process like spring cleaning will you know, take multiple days, days, but yeah, try to organize it or at least like pick like one area or one thing that I found to like really work with, like work for me when I'm cleaning especially like when it comes to ADHD is like I force myself to stay in one room.
Speaker 1:So if it's the bathroom, like if I find anything that does not belong in the bathroom, I set it by the door and I don't allow myself to leave that space until that space is clean and I have everything else set by the door that needs to be taken elsewhere. And then I do that because, if you like let's say, for example, like in the bathroom, like I find something that belongs in the closet, like a sock on the floor or something like that If I pick up that sock and go to the closet, then then I'm gonna find somebody else or something else in the closet for me to then do and you're just like bebopping around and you're just kind of doing little things, but you feel like you're not making progress, like like a ton of progress in one area.
Speaker 2:So that's just a helpful tip well, also right now, since we started packing, there's freaking shit everywhere in our living room so it gives me like anxiety because there's just bins everywhere. But I mean before, before I came to you, I was like in spring cleaning mode for like the past two hours before I came here and I was just trying to clean up everything around that. And it did make me feel better, like, even though there's other clutter going on because we started the packing process, I can still clean around that and it felt good. I love that and I feel like when you open the windows for some reason, it feels like all the germs and like all the dust is just flowing out of the apartment and the negative energy.
Speaker 1:Yes, like the trapped energy that's been in there since.
Speaker 2:Like because we can't open our fucking windows in the winter, literally, even though I do sometimes, yeah, literally um.
Speaker 1:Hot girls drive with the windows cracked, no matter what season no matter what like that is one thing. Like when live and I like first met, we were driving around in the winter time and she had her windows cracked. I was like this is my bitch, like we are the same person, because I need that fresh air I had never met anybody else that did that until I met you, I have to say yes, all my friends, they even alex.
Speaker 2:I'll like roll down the window a little and he'll freaking shut it immediately I'm like does the same thing.
Speaker 1:Oh my god, I need that energy flow.
Speaker 2:I need to be insane. I feel trapped if I don't have it open.
Speaker 1:No, and this is just example 8 million and 78 of why live worth and shelby speak are the same human being literally.
Speaker 2:Oh my god, I feel like that goes into our next one though what is the next one? So kind of clearing out your mental clutter. You had a a good thing. What did I? Say about brain dumping oh yeah, oh my god, I was listening to mel on my way to shelby's mel robbins.
Speaker 2:She's the best, but she basically every sunday she resets herself and does these seven things and one of this. One of the things is brain dumping. Um, and just writing everything down that's in your brain so that you can just mentally like get rid of it. And when you write it down, something in your brain like allows you to free up space. When it's written down because it's like out of your brain, I don't know, it's like a psychological thing, yeah, but, um, I really want to start doing that because she's like you just write, you don't. Until you do it, you don't realize how many things you're keeping in your brain and your mind, like, how many things are just like circulating in there, so trying your best to get them out and then rip it up and throw the paper away at the end and it might be scary to do it at first, but like, yeah, when you think about it, like there's so many like things that could be swirling in your head about so many different things.
Speaker 1:Like you could be overthinking a conversation that you had with somebody like a couple weeks ago and like I should have said this or done this and oh, but I also, I gotta schedule this doctor's appointment, I gotta do this, and then you're thinking about work and then you're like oh my god, what am I gonna make for dinner tonight?
Speaker 1:and then this, that or whatever, and it's like it's all swirling in your head that you can't, you can't like physically sort it out in your head, like there's no like filing cabinet with different like areas for you to sort information into, like.
Speaker 1:Sometimes it takes, like Liv said, like brain dumping everything down and like physically seeing it on paper, but then that also brings it into your reality and makes it real, so then you can actually start to work through it yes, because, if, because, if I keep that in my brain, it's never going to leave, especially when I go down to sleep at night, like that's a huge thing for me.
Speaker 2:My brain does not want to shut off, so I need to get better at just decluttering my mind before, like resting my head on the pillow too. I feel like a lot of us need to work on that.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I think the first time we attempted to record, we talked a lot about protecting your mental headspace by not picking up the phone right away in the morning.
Speaker 2:Yes, yeah, I am very guilty of that, so am I, and at night, so am.
Speaker 1:I.
Speaker 2:But in the morning you said something funny. You were like sometimes you're on. If you go on TikTok right away and you're on it, you don't realize how long you're on it and then you you feel like you entered a different dimension, or literally I am so guilty of that.
Speaker 1:I'm so mad at myself every time I do that because, like you open your your phone like when you're not even like fully conscious or even awake. Yeah, like, yeah, I have a hatch alarm clock that cost me 130 and that wakes me up with pretty bird noises and like the light or all the things, but like that doesn't do shit, shelby if you're reaching for your phone like five seconds after. So I need to get better at putting my phone like in the, the kitchen or whatever.
Speaker 2:But because you're starting off with a chaotic day, if you start off looking at your phone right away because you're entering yourself into all these other people's lives, and then you have like it's just crazy, and then that becomes your reality because you haven't even spent like five minutes in your own reality before you're entering a different, like digital reality and like all these people are throwing all these opinions at you.
Speaker 1:It's elevating your cortisol for the day, all these things. And then you put your phone down like ready to actually like start the day and you're like, holy fuck, what dimension am I in? Like you, just I feel blurry yeah, the world actually feels blurry like physically, because you've been staring at a phone screen that's so close to your face for so long. Yeah, but b you're like, where am I?
Speaker 2:what am I doing which is scary?
Speaker 1:like it shouldn't be like that, no probably relate to that on some level, but like, jokes aside, like that's just not healthy.
Speaker 2:No, our brains aren't meant for that. I also love. I feel like something that's been helping me not look at my phone right away. I need to get better at doing it every day. But, mel Robbins, what is it? 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 method where you just like say in your brain, like you don't give yourself time to think, you just say, okay, 5, 4, three, two, one out of bed. Or five four, three, two, one, I'm not going to think about that anymore. Like that, I don't know something. And when you say that in your head, it just kind of resets it and just doesn't let you think about the situation so you can move on to the next thing.
Speaker 1:Well, your brain can't like physically focus on like thinking about two things at once. So if you're focusing on counting down, you're not like talking yourself out of doing the thing that you're doing. That's so real I think that's like the science behind it or whatever.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:But, like you've already made the commitment, when you start counting down, and because it's like going so fast that like you don't have time to like, tell yourself not to do it.
Speaker 2:Yeah, finding ways to like quiet the mind. I feel like that goes in with like night routine though too Like either meditating or journaling, which you were talking about. How journaling is pretty much like brain dumping, like that's the kind of the whole point to get your emotions out, so you can kind of let those things go. But finding ways to like chill out your mind, even if you have to do it in the morning first when you wake up, whether that be meditating, doing yoga, even just stretching, I feel like helps you get a better start to your day and helps you kind of like free that space in your head.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I started stretching like in the morning, like I I'm not somebody that likes to wake up and like do a workout in the morning before. I just like a slow.
Speaker 2:I am not that person. I tried and it is just not for me.
Speaker 1:I can't like I have to do it, like either like on a lunch break or like after work, because I just I'm already like when I open my eyes which this is also terrible but like immediately I'm like entering into work mode, because I know I'm preparing myself for that.
Speaker 1:So the last thing that I want to do is like go and do a workout. If it works for you, great. But like finding time to spend time with yourself, especially like, if it's only like 15, 20 minutes in the morning, to just be and set your intentions for the day. Be and set your intentions for the day, be present, like stretch your body out and, yeah, do whatever you can to like be with yourself and, like you know, clear out like the mental clutter, like we've been saying, actually like goes like a really long way like I'm not doing like an hour and a half hit workout and like going fucking crazy by any means.
Speaker 2:If you can do that in the morning, great kudos to you.
Speaker 1:I love that for you right, like everybody finds what works for them. But if you don't have enough time for that in the morning because maybe you start work early or maybe you have kids or whatever the case, maybe just find like 5 to 10 to 15 minutes like in the morning to just meditate and and clear your headspace for the day yeah, love that which leads us to clearing your schedule and simplifying it.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah, which is huge. You okay over there?
Speaker 1:Yeah, I'm good, I'm good, I'm just looking off into space trying to think of what I want to say. I was like are you still with us? Is she still in this current reality? Is she off in space?
Speaker 2:Who knows? Oh no, but simplifying your schedule and making sure you're spending time for yourself and like, or spending time with yourself. Self-care days, mental health days, I like to call them. If I didn't have those, I would lose my shit and then like project on other people because I'm stressed out and tired because I didn't pour energy into myself. You can't pour from an empty cup, so you really need to make sure you're taking time for you and not like filling your schedule with 5 million things. Oh yeah, because that's just going to cause you to lead to burnout.
Speaker 1:I feel like you've like specifically gotten so much better at this Cause. I remember you, like a couple of years ago, talking about this being like a pain point for you, and how you were saying yes to like too many things Cause you didn't want to let people down and I'm like way too many. You're letting yourself down.
Speaker 2:Exactly. No, that's so true. You're letting yourself down at the end of the day because you're not being able. You're not able to pour into your own cup, which is not how life should be going Right.
Speaker 1:And not just like decluttering and like cleaning out, like your schedule and like figuring out like which areas of your life like need to be prioritized, but also like reevaluating the balance that you have in your life like need to be prioritized, but also like re-evaluating the balance that you have in your life too like trying to find, you know, areas of your life where maybe you're pouring too much energy into and maybe you need to like pull back a little bit so then you can pour energy into like more areas of life.
Speaker 1:For example, like for me, like work has been like super stressful like the last couple months, and that's just how it, how it is and and that's what's going on. But I've also had to then do the due diligence for me to remind myself that it's my personal responsibility to like shut the laptop at a decent time every day to prioritize other areas of my life, still my physical well-being, all these things. Because if you don't, you know, prioritize that and like look at your schedule, like you may be overexerting yourself in one area and not nurturing others. Yes, that you want to.
Speaker 2:You need to take full control over your schedule, doing that even like every Sunday or Saturday, like just resetting, okay what's going on this week. Alex and I, at the beginning of every month, we have a calendar that we share, that we have on the fridge, and we erase it all and then write out the new calendar, like month, and like like write down everything we have going on, even if it's like I have to stay late this day for work or I'm going in for a client on my day off, Like we write down everything. So that way, we're aligned and we know what's going on. I love that, yeah, and I feel like it's you're taking full control over it and it's helping you prioritize things that are going on and it allows you to figure out okay, I have this going on, this going on, when can I spend time with myself, when can I, you know, do this self care on this day, or you know what I mean.
Speaker 1:And then scheduling those in.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's like prioritizing and strategizing and setting boundaries by like writing it out. I don't know, it's just like something we've been doing for like the past year, right.
Speaker 1:It's no different than like at your job, for example, like you have to be organized and you have to like, of course, like have a to do list and all of these things. Like managing your job, like managing your life, is the same way. If you don't do that, then like it's going to crumble and you're going to sacrifice a lot of like your time and energy. Yeah, like for the wrong things.
Speaker 2:And I feel like me starting my own business had has made me like more organized, because every single week I have to look at my schedule and be like, okay, what color do I need, or am I missing this color? Or what tool do I need to go pick up stuff from the supply store? Like it makes me, like it's made me a way better planner and like it's made me way more organized.
Speaker 1:I love that. Yeah, that's awesome. Yeah, so okay, so that was mental clutter. It was mental clutter and then simplify, simplifying your schedule we're already on number four and planning your time wisely.
Speaker 2:Yes, yeah.
Speaker 1:So number four is reevaluating your goals, which we brought this up the first time that we recorded. We feel like around this time almost should be like our new year.
Speaker 1:Like, I feel like living in the Midwest, like, although we can complain about the winters and all the things and like they're long, I also very thoroughly appreciate that we live somewhere that has the four seasons, because I feel like it forces you to kind of go through this cycle where you know you're kind of shutting layers of yourself and then you know, going into winter you're entering into like hibernation and like rest mode where obviously nobody wants to go outside. Yeah, it like forces you to like rest and stay in.
Speaker 1:Yeah, but I feel like now we're coming out of that period and we're moving into like a rebirth period where, like you know, new things are blooming outside, like the snow is melting, it's getting sunnier outside, like the sun is going to be here longer now, which is so exciting it literally feels like my soul, or it feels like something is like leaving my body when I see the sun out and the snow is melting like I don't even know how to explain it.
Speaker 2:I feel like the depression, the like not to I don't want to say like winter depression, but like, but, like, yeah, that like part of the season is like literally leaving my body it's like kind of like a release. Yes, yeah, it's like a release of energy. Wow, that's a great yeah way to think about that.
Speaker 1:I'm feeling it today too, like I don't know what's in the air when I woke up this morning like it's woke up.
Speaker 2:The sun is like beaming through our curtains. I'm like, oh my god. And then I open the windows and it's just like breezy and 60 degrees out. I literally felt like a different fucking human, iconic. That like the weather is so great. Oh my god, it determines my mood.
Speaker 1:I'm sorry but like the weather determines my mood.
Speaker 2:When it's rainy and gloomy I'm like extra tired and like is it working?
Speaker 1:oh yeah, it's still working okay well, we're good, we're just checking in, but do you feel like that way too?
Speaker 1:oh, the weather totally affects, oh, it totally affects my mood which is why, like, the summer is like the period for like blossoming and like doing all these things. But yeah, like, when it comes to like spring cleaning, like also cleaning through like past goals that you've set for yourself and like realigning on your priorities for like the next coming months, I don't know. I feel like our new year like needs to be around this time, because it just makes so much more sense. March 15th.
Speaker 2:Yes, literally yeah, mid-march, but setting new intentions.
Speaker 1:Also like don't be like when it comes to goal setting. I think something that I had to learn a lot was like it's okay to set a goal for yourself, but not to like have all this negative self-talk around it if you haven't achieved it yet. Like I had to get rid of. Like the perfectionist mentality and just focusing on the positives and like how much progress you've made so far, like towards those goals versus like how much that you have further yet to go.
Speaker 2:Yes, exactly, and I think about like even how much we've grown in just like a year, like I think about us last time or last year at this time. It's like wild how many like things we've gone through even like six months ago, like we're totally different people. So just kind of like shedding that skin and reflecting on it and like setting new intentions like setting new intentions, it's okay.
Speaker 1:Like if your goals shift and change, like as you get older and as you come across like new life experiences. Like obviously, like you're going to be changing as a human being. The person that I am today and the person that you are today, like you said, is not the same person we were a year ago.
Speaker 1:Like obviously, we're literally the same people, but like we have learned so many new things and like adapted so many different things into our life that, like we didn't have a year ago. And then you know, obviously we're not the same person that we were in high school. So, yeah, even if, like you had a goal like for us oh my God, my early 20s I was like I want to be a millionaire and I'm going to make all this money, and same was in the hustle mindset and like did all the digital marketing and that fun stuff. Um, but now, like my goals have completely changed. Like now my goal in, like, the next year is to buy a house. Hopefully, I will hopefully get engaged.
Speaker 1:Like looking at, like different things. Like I also want to get back into more hobbies. Like I miss doing creative things, like with my hands. I love painting, I love art, I love all of that stuff. So I want to get back into that. But also like looking at, like my physical health and all these things. But like it's okay if your goals change and shift. So like don't get mad at yourself. Or like don't be hard on yourself if, like you used to previously, previously want something and now, like you don't want it anymore. Like that's okay, like, you've outgrown a goal and that's that's normal in your 20s.
Speaker 2:That's gonna happen every fucking six months, every four months, every month.
Speaker 2:We were talking about it last when we first recorded this, about how hard your 20s are, and mel robbins literally said like your 20s are the worst years of your life, which is so true, which is so true like I don't want to look at that I don't want to look at that in like a super negative way, because I do feel like there's positives with that, because it is really the decade where you're going to learn the most lessons and like really really build your character and who you are as a person. So that way, when you enter your 30s, you are just, you don't give a fuck Right, and you're who you are and you're unapologetically, unapolog, oh my God Unapologetically you.
Speaker 1:Fuck and also talk about like, how, like the structure.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah, Mel said it's because From when you're up until you're 20 years old, your whole life is structured. So then when you enter like, you start entering like your mid twenties, early twenties it's like a shit show and you have to create the structure for yourself and it's like it's a whole like learning experience and process trying to figure that out and you are learning from your mistakes, You're effing up, You're figuring out who is meant to be in your life, who's going to serve you, what's going to serve you, what's not going to serve you, and it's just like a whole decade of like. It's like a learning curve. Yeah.
Speaker 1:Like in high school, for example. Like my experience was like I would wake up, like my mom would already be up, like making breakfast, like when I was young, she'd make breakfast for us, and then, obviously, we got to the age where we could make ourselves a fucking bagel, like I didn't need my mom to make me a bagel at the age of 16, but you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1:Like you, just you had that structured routine where, like every morning or like every day felt somewhat the same, where everybody around you was kind of helping you keep this structured lifestyle because, of course, like you're a child, like they're brazing you, like you need to be given structure, all these things. But I don't think enough people talk about, like the shock to your system that comes when you first like go out into the world on your own and like you wake up and you know like you're in your apartment and you go out to make breakfast and your mom is no longer there and that's not part of your routine.
Speaker 1:Like she's not helping you schedule your doctor's appointments. She's not, you know, like doing all of these things.
Speaker 1:And you know like in college, even if you know you're living on your own obviously most people aren't living with their parents at the time you still have your set college classes where mondays and wednesdays your classes were at this time tuesdays and thursdays, your classes at this time like your routine was probably going out on a Thursday night and getting shit faced with your friends, like waking up hungover Friday morning or at least that was mine most Thursdays, but that was like my routine like. But once you leave that structured environment whether it's like school or home or all the things, and you're on your own, that's tough it is and there's there's beauty in that stage of your life.
Speaker 2:There really is like figuring it out and learning from your mistakes and figuring out your own structure. But also I feel like society doesn't set you up for success in your 20s. Nothing prepares you for being on your own, which is kind of fucked up. I feel like in high school they should be teaching like more about how to manage your finances, how to build generational wealth, how to you know be independent and you know be disciplined Like that's not taught, even like I think of. Okay, this is kind of off topic, but I was talking about this with one of my clients about the female cycle and like how our hormones are affecting everything in our life as females and that is not taught in our school system no, that needs to be taught I didn't start learning about that till like last year.
Speaker 2:Yep, like about my hormones and why I am the way I am, and like how my cycle affects my mood every single day.
Speaker 1:Like isn't that freaking and then you feel like you're not crazy the more that you know this information. I can tell you why it's not being taught in our school and that's because of our government, but that's another story for another day. Fucking hate it here, yeah. But there's just I. I'm like dead set on. I don't think it'll ever happen, or maybe it will, getting like an emotional intelligence course, like into middle schools or high schools.
Speaker 1:That would be the biggest step in the right direction. We all have emotions, every single one of us. It doesn't matter who you are, yeah, what walk of life you come from. You are a human being with emotions, and yet nobody teaches you how to know them and then they wonder why these people have mental health problems.
Speaker 2:Right, because nobody knows how to manage their emotions or work through them. They just yeah, it's literally just a whole cycle that's never ending and our society is not built in that way to like make us succeed and be sane. Instead, we're doing math problems with letters long division why the fuck am I learning long division when I could learn about my cycle and my hormones? That's gonna be with me the rest of my life make it worth my time.
Speaker 2:At least we have ai and we have google and we have a calculator on our phone. Now we don't need to learn fucking long division right?
Speaker 1:no, I'm sorry, unless you're gonna be a mathematician, right and even that if you're gonna be a mathematician like you can probably do long division in your head.
Speaker 2:Let's be, honest, literally, if you can't, then good luck, charlie.
Speaker 1:I don't know no, sorry, that was kind of off topic but I feel like it kind of was kind of also on topic yeah, what were you talking about, though? Setting new intentions, yes, yes, setting like for you, jesus the life of shelby and live squirrel.
Speaker 2:We go on a tangent and now here we are one diagnosed, one undiagnosed, self-diagnosed.
Speaker 1:But it's fine literally.
Speaker 2:Literally the same boat.
Speaker 1:But, yeah, bring it home, just have grace with yourself in the process. Like your twenties are times for reevaluating your goals. Your goals are not going to look the same and it's okay to start fresh. It's okay to celebrate, like, how far you've come on on certain goals. Like I, you know, like there's been times where, like I had a goal set for myself and, like I, you know, put effort in towards achieving it. I didn't get all the way there but, like I made progress and the fact that, like you even had made progress like, shows that like you are capable of like working towards a goal, and that's what you need to celebrate.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I feel like we don't celebrate our wins enough, even if it's like small wins. Even if it's like small wins, like thinking of how, like I think of us when we were we first met and like I think of how far we've come to actually like, really like process.
Speaker 2:That is crazy. Like, for example, too, when I was in beauty school, I was like my goal is to open my own suite, and then I kept telling myself that ever since I was in the industry and now here I am, three years later, opening my own suite like it takes time and it takes you committing to your progress and celebrating yourself and believing in yourself for you.
Speaker 2:Literally the first thing I told my instructors was like I want to have my own suite. That was the first thing I told them when we were talking about our goals.
Speaker 1:Oh, my God, and I remember. You like having those conversations with me and that's another thing too like it's also okay to have the same goals. Like if there's things that are really important to you, like you don't need to have the whole road mapped out, like what did I say last episode. Like you don't need to see like the whole forest in order to see, like the first step, yeah, like the next step in front of you, yeah, like for you, like your goal was the suite.
Speaker 1:You didn't know exactly how to get there like the paths weren't mapped out for you, but like, obviously you had to stumble along, you maybe tripped over a few branches, you know, smacked your face a few times, but like you get back up and like you keep going and like eventually you'll get to where you're going if you, if you put one foot in front of the other and still, like laser, focus in on a goal that you have because it's important to you yeah, exactly, but I also love the idea of how like goals can shift as well, because I do feel like when you mentioned us in our early 20s 20s wanting to be like millionaires and have this crazy fucking lifestyle, and now here we are wanting like the most, like minimalistic, comfortable, like what am I trying to say?
Speaker 2:wholesome lifestyle. That's like all we want now. Like it's okay to like shift as you age.
Speaker 1:Well, we didn't know what we didn't know back then, yeah, which is why our goal was to be a millionaire and to live this grandiose lifestyle. Yeah, but as we learned and progressed, we gathered more information about what's important in life and adapted that to be part of like who we are as people, where now, like, our goals have shifted because of that yeah, which is such a beautiful process to go through it really is and to be celebrated.
Speaker 2:I love that, cheers this is why we needed to record a second time, exactly, and we're still going, which is amazing.
Speaker 1:Hell yeah, I love it um.
Speaker 2:The next one is talking about relationships, friendships, nurturing.
Speaker 1:Yeah I feel like this also. I mean it can go back to like your schedule too, because, like, it takes time to pour energy into people analyzing the circle around you, like the, what is it the five people you spend the most time with? Like?
Speaker 1:really a reflection of who you are and like yeah, you directly influence, like who you are, like what you believe, like your values. I mean, of course, like you can stand firm on your own, but like you are very easily influenced by the people around you. So, just re-evaluating your time that you're spending not only like with your relationship with, like a partner, because that's what a lot of people think when it comes to relationships, but relationships also are like the relationship you have with yourself, the relationship you have with friends, the relationship you have with coworkers or like a boss, like relationships that you have with family members, like there's just so many different types of relationships that you have in your life and if one is exhausting a lot of effort from you and it's draining you more than it's filling up your cup, like re-evaluating those relationships and asking yourself, like do I actually need to be pouring as much time and energy into this person as I currently am? Because is it serving me? Is it not serving me? Like, where can I put this energy to serve me better?
Speaker 2:yeah and it's okay if it's not serving you, like let it go and you don't have to explain yourself. I feel like that's a huge thing if there's certain relationships and friendships that aren't putting value into your life and like if they're just draining you.
Speaker 1:Like shelby said, let that shit go and don't feel the need to explain yourself if somebody, if somebody's in your life and you need to like walk away or at least take a step back from the relationship with that person whatever type of relationship that is like a they're probably not like the best suited for you anyway. So b don't feel like you need to explain yourself and your reasoning to them for doing so, because they probably won't even get it anyway. Like the people that you want in your life like will wholeheartedly understand if you need to take a step back and you need to take like time for yourself. Like there's been plenty of times where you need to take like time for yourself. Like there's been plenty of times where you and I have like planned to hang out and then we're like, yeah, I can't do it today, Like you know, like I, just we're just honest with each other and like we're understanding like we don't take it out of each other for that yeah.
Speaker 2:The respect and just support is there, like we're always there for one another, no matter what we're going through.
Speaker 1:understand and we get it like we. I don't, because it's that's life you always come first, like you yourself always comes first, and like you always need to make sure that you're good. And I would feel like a terrible friend if, like you, were coming over to hang out with me when you wish that you could be pouring energy back into yourself, because then that would make me feel guilty and like I would rather you, like, just speak up and say like I need time for myself, and like we both understand that, which is why it's so easy for us to like tell each other hey, I can't do it today and like we don't take offense to it, because no we get it.
Speaker 2:That literally was what happened last weekend. Like you had a crazy ass weekend and we were going to record the podcast and you only had Sunday to like chill and I was like you know what? You just take your you just take your reset day. I need to melt on the couch I was like I think you do you need a reset. We can just do it next weekend, but we get it.
Speaker 1:You know like the it and it's that's why, like, our friendship is so beautiful and why it works so well. But if you have people in your life like that, where, like, you're trying to advocate for yourself and you're saying, like I need time for myself or like all these things, and you have people in your life that are making you feel bad, for that, like, rather than asking how you can please them and make them happier, like ask if they're even serving you in the first place, yeah, facts.
Speaker 2:I think. Another thing too as far as like nurturing certain relationships go, I feel like I've been spending a lot more time with family, like my grandparents. I still have two great grandmas that are still alive, which is so iconic yeah, which is amazing.
Speaker 2:We're very blessed to have them. But just like making sure I'm spending time with them, because those are the people that have supported me and they want to see me win. And it's just like it's almost nostalgic now that when every time I hang out with my grandparents the other day I was on the West side Cause they I mean they live over there and I was like running errands and stuff and I had like two hours to spare before my next like appointment I had over there, and there was a little voice in my head like reach out to them so you can go see them, cause you're not gonna be able to see them forever. And then I called my grandma which makes me kind of emotional, but I like texted my grandma. I was like I'm literally right down the road, can I stop by? And we sat and chatted with my. I sat and chatted with my grandparents for like three hours two, three hours before my next appointment and it made their fucking day like just little things like that.
Speaker 2:I feel like I'm not me cheering up. I feel like I've been really trying to prioritize my family, because when we're younger we're in our you know, late teens, early 20s we're kind of just like. We're kind of just more selfish, like we don't. We're just really care about ourself and with being with friends and you know, living it, living it up. And now that I'm entering my mid 20s, it's kind of like I want to appreciate the people that are surrounded by me, that have supported me from the beginning. I love that it's so crazy.
Speaker 1:I feel like we're on the same trajectory, because that was one of my New Year's resolutions was to like contact family more like yeah, my entire family is like two hours north so I don't really get to see them all too often unless I'm like actively picking up the phone and FaceTiming them or texting them or, like you know, conversing with them.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and I've just been so bad at like my phone and like reaching out to people in general, like I don't really text like anybody other than like Tyler to bring me down my water bottle because I'm thirsty. But other than that, like I'm not really like in my phone texting people and it it bothered me when I reflected on it like what I wanted my New Year's resolutions to be, because I'm not really like in my phone texting people and it it bothered me when I reflected on it like what I wanted my new year's resolutions to be, because I'm like oh my god, like my I'm literally going and growing up like in my 20s and like my family doesn't get to see that because I don't reach out to them enough to share the details of my life, even if it feels like mundane, and I'm just like what, who cares about me? Talking about another day of me like they want to know.
Speaker 1:Like they want to know, they want to hear from you, and that is something that, like, I'm going to prioritize more, and I love that you're doing the same yeah because it's it's so important and, unfortunately, like you never know, like when your last day is like with somebody yeah, which is heartbreaking.
Speaker 2:Like it's sounds morbid, but like it's fucking. Like we can't just take our days for granted, because we're not all going to be here at the same time for you know forever.
Speaker 1:Damn.
Speaker 1:Wow, that got deep bye we need to go to bed, literally the next one is detoxing your digital life, and this is something that I think both of us are so like set on doing constantly. Like I'm so protective over like who I follow on social media and obviously, like you can't always control everything that you see, but it's okay to unfollow from like people's pages if, like you're not aligning with something that's being posted like rather than you know letting yourself like get all emotional about it and you know letting it hurt you more than it should just do yourself, like the due diligence to you know unfollow. Or if you see something like on tiktok or something, click like not interested or at least doing what you can in your power to like clean up like your digital space so it's healthy for you I also think it's actually bad shit, crazy, when I see my screen time pop up and it says your weekly report this is how much average you're spending on your phone a day.
Speaker 2:I literally cannot even comprehend that I've spent that much time on my phone. I scream same. But like I, I've been trying to pay more closely attention to that because it's like when you look at that number it's like think of all the other things you could have done during that time of you scrolling on your phone. Sometimes it says six hours a day. How am I spending that much time? Oh my seven hours.
Speaker 2:One time it said eight. That was like wow, wait, what, that's a full work. That is literally a full work day. Like what in the fuck? Anyways, evaluate how much time you're spending on your phone, just point blank and go to your report, because that that's not gonna lie.
Speaker 2:That will show you how much time you're spending on your phone and it'll make you open your eyes to the fact that you are scrolling way too much. I mean, granted, I do do a lot of work on my phone, like I'm answering the emails I'm responding to clients.
Speaker 2:I'm booking appointments, but it's like, clearly, I mean, that only takes me probably like an hour or two a day. That's not taking me six hours. No, oh god yeah. So I've just been trying to be more aware of that and figuring out, okay, what could I, what else could I be doing during that time? Or when I catch myself strolling, I'm like, oh my god, okay, put the phone down.
Speaker 1:Well, and that goes along too with like setting like, like digital boundaries, like just in the same way that you need to set boundaries with like, maybe like certain family members or like people in your life, like you also need to set boundaries like with your phone because, believe it or not, like you also have a relationship with your phone as well and like a toxic relationship is like them.
Speaker 1:You know, being involved in your life like so much. Like the phone has such a grip on so many people in our society, I'll be the first person to raise my hand and say like I'm addicted. There's so many people that are addicted to their phones because of like the scrolling and the dopamine and like all these things, and just working on which I again will raise my right hand and say I need to work on this, is like setting boundaries with my phone.
Speaker 1:I know that you can set timers timers where which I need to do after like a certain hour, an app won't be available, which I've been dreading doing but I need to do. After like a certain hour, an app won't be available, which I've been dreading doing, but I need to do it.
Speaker 2:Maybe I'll do it today. Let's do it. Spring cleaning let's do it.
Speaker 1:Let's set an app or like a. I don't know how you do it, but I'm going to research it.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Like how to not allow yourself to go on Tik TOK after, like a certain time like in the morning.
Speaker 2:It's also like you're not missing out on anything by not scrolling, like you're not, you're watching other people's lives. Why don't we just focus on our own fucking lives like you're not missing out on anything? Why do we get that dopamine from our phone? Like it's like we feel like a fear of like missing out by not seeing people's content, which is like kind of fucking crazy if you think about it something's important enough, like you have my phone number where you can give me a call and reach me.
Speaker 1:Or if you can't reach me because my phone's down, like you can call my boyfriend and get a hold of him. Or like, if something's really that urgent in life like there's ways to get a hold of me. Like I it's okay to like put your phone down and like not respond to text for like seven hours yeah like I'll do that.
Speaker 1:Like like what was it last weekend? Like you sent me a text and I don't think I responded for like six hours, but that's literally because I didn't pick up my phone yeah, right, yeah it's.
Speaker 2:It's okay to like it's totally fine, I'm not gonna be mad at you for not responding, unless it's fucking urgent then yeah, like you said, I'll literally call you if it's that urgent, right exactly it's really not that big of a deal at the end of the day, and if people get mad at you for not texting back quick enough, that's, that's their problem.
Speaker 1:That's another issue that you're dealing with yeah so boundaries yeah, setting boundaries, which is huge that's a major one um, next one just and I know like we talked a lot about this, like when we first attempted to record, but like health and wellness, I feel like there's so much like thrown at you down your throat about health and wellness on social media that it's so easy to become overwhelmed by the whole process and like feel like you're not doing enough and that you're not healthy enough or you're not skinny enough and like all of these things.
Speaker 2:So like aligning on your own health and wellness goals and like taking all of that with a grain of salt. Like cause there's so many people and I was guilty of it too Like you can't listen to everything that you're seeing on social media. Like there's there's people posting videos Okay, how to lose fat and fucking five days, how to cure your gut problems. Or like fix your gut health. Like you can take certain things into consideration, but don't be like gung ho and like listen to everything you see on the internet, because everybody's bodies are so different and you have to figure out what works best for you when it comes to your own health and wellness journey. And that's why I say just take everything with a grain of salt. Like I've definitely gotten advice from social media Instagram, tiktok when it comes to health and wellness, but now I just like pinpoint certain things where I'm like oh, I could try that or I could try that. I'm not like psychotic about it.
Speaker 1:Right, well, and like it's so easy like to become so like consumed by everybody else's opinions and what is being like forced down your throat, like when you're scrolling on social media, and like it can get very confusing very quickly because, like maybe one person's saying this, but then another person is saying that, and like you have these health influencers that are then saying like oh, like I heard that, like this is a fad, like you can't listen to that, you have to do this, and then you have like other people telling you not to listen to certain type of advice and everything's all conflicting and it just gets all too overwhelming.
Speaker 1:Where I think a better practice?
Speaker 1:Because, like you said, like there are so many good tips, yeah, on social media and people or at least some people are like genuinely trying to help and better other people's lives but rather than letting social media tell you what you need to work on yourself, like decide, decide that for yourself first, before you even open TikTok, before you even open another app, or like your phone, write down like what your goals are and how you want to feel when it comes to like your physical, like health and wellness, and then go searching for bits and pieces of information that will then aid in whatever goal it is that you have.
Speaker 1:Like, yeah, for me, like I've tried intermittent fasting and like it's going so well for me it's clearing up a lot of my brain fog, like I feel a lot more awake and like alert, and like some people just don't like intermittent fasting and that's fine, but like it's, it depends on like you and your lifestyle too, Like I know for me that's not going to work because of my like be being on my feet and exerting like a ton of energy throughout the day and like I don't know if it just you.
Speaker 2:You need to figure out what works, what works best for you, because my lifestyle might not align with Shelby's and that's why different things work for us, if that makes sense, yeah.
Speaker 1:No, a hundred percent. Like just it's so easy to feel like an immense amount of pressure, especially as a woman and especially being in your 20s, to like, if you're a woman in your 20s, like on your health and wellness grind. Like it can be challenging at times and it can be overwhelming, especially like if you didn't grow up in a household where like that was taught to you and that was embodied. Like it takes a lot of grit and determination. But be patient with yourself. Don't like just try a bunch of fads and like quick fixes and all these things.
Speaker 1:It really is about like a lifestyle change which yeah, I think you were talking about too, like when we first attempted to record, which I think we've said like the 12th time already but about like turning it into a lifestyle and doing what feels good for you, versus like trying to like change a bunch of things in your routine routine super quickly because you're going to fall off within three days.
Speaker 2:No, exactly that was my biggest goal for 2025 in January. I just wanted to focus on making it a lifestyle, focusing on my health and wellness and focusing on me feeling good from within. I needed to stop the weight loss shit. I needed to stop focusing on what I look like on the outside. How am I feeling on the inside? Because that's going to reflect how you look on the outside.
Speaker 2:So I feel like I've just been very, a lot more like intuitive with my body and my nutrition and my fitness. I feel like for a while, I was, you know, doing trying to do hard workouts and like heavy lifting and like all these things that I was seeing on social media, when, in reality, doing like walks every day and like focusing on hot flow yoga has been like the best thing ever for me. Like I feel better than ever just doing those things and doing more of the low impact fitness right, like yeah, it's. I feel like that's a perfect example, because I've just like focused on that and I've never felt better and I've been more intuitively eating, just listening to my body, what feels right. How is I also think about before I eat, like is this going to give me energy or is this going to make me feel like shit? Like just like little things like that? Like switching that in your brain and asking yourself those questions really does make the biggest difference ever I finally started that mental switch believe it or not?
Speaker 1:Really yes, congrats.
Speaker 2:Shelby. We love that Because at the end of the day, it's not worth it. I mean like having balance and like treating yourself once in a while yes, like I'm all for that. We are foodies over here Period. We love our food, we love good food, but like just everyday basis, like during the week you're still being intuitive and like fueling yourself with things that are going to make you feel good and energized, absolutely.
Speaker 1:And about like the whole workouts thing too. Like you may see somebody else working out on social media and like doing a bunch of like these heavy lifting, like these HIIT workouts, but maybe their health and wellness goals are different than yours.
Speaker 2:Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 1:How can you expect yourself to put yourself through what another person is doing if that's like not what your goal is even in the first place? Like it comes back to like being present in the moment with yourself and like asking yourself like what do I truly want out of this experience? Like am I wanting to lose a bunch of weight because I feel pressured to do so, or am I wanting to go into the gym and wanting to start working out and, like you know, develop this routine because I want to feel good and I want to feel confident about myself? Like it also needs to come from like an internal drive and motivation, versus like other people making you feel like shit for not yeah, that makes sense.
Speaker 2:No, exactly. Well, in a world full of um, we'll just say supplements and shots to make you lose weight very quickly and like that. People are wanting that like instant gratification of weight loss and like feeling healthy. I have quotes around feeling healthy because at the end of the day, I feel like those people aren't truly feeling healthy. They're just wanting like a quick fix. It's not like you have to literally make this like a lifestyle and then over time you're going to start feeling so much better and it'll just it'll be a whole cycle.
Speaker 2:Like everything internally. Internally is gonna reflect externally, externally like if you have bad gut health. It can lead to skin issues. It can lead to hair issues, scalp issues, like. But people just think you know they can have like a quick fix with something else. But it's really fixing your internal health right.
Speaker 1:Well, and something too like, especially as women, like something that is so crucial to your physical health and wellness that just doesn't affect men is like your hormonal cycle yes, ours is over a 28 day period Like there are natural fluctuations, like in our hormones.
Speaker 1:It's what produces like the mechanism for us to literally give birth to other human beings that men have.
Speaker 1:I think it's like a 24 hour cycle. And just knowing like the inner workings of your hormones and like how you feel, like at different points of your cycle, like it's okay to nurture yourself and rest when you're in your luteal phase and like not go as hard, where in your follicular phase you're going to have a lot more energy, like all these things. Like your body's preparing yourself for ovulation there really is like a science behind it. So just knowing at least like basic information around that can also give yourself a lot more empathy and grace for like your own body. When you wake up one day and you don't have a ton of energy, like you don't need to like have a bunch of negative self-talk. You can just, you know, give yourself grace and be like it's okay that I'm like not feeling a hundred percent today, but that's not because, like I'm a piece of shit, like it's because, like my body is literally like going through a cycle that is beautiful to human life.
Speaker 1:And like that's just how it is.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I love that you mentioned that, because that, like the fricking women's cycle, needs to be talked about way. I feel like it finally is being talked about more through social media, but it needs to be talked about way more than it is and men need to take a class on it so they can fucking understand.
Speaker 1:I. I like I will educate Tyler whenever I possibly can like on the cycle, like I gave. I sent him like a couple tiktoks that like explain it, like basic information, wise, like all the all the things.
Speaker 1:But I'm like I need you to understand that, like I can't be the same person every single day, in the same way that you can, because I don't have the same kinds of energy that you do like every single day, like some days I do, but like when I'm in my luteal phase the brain fog is up the wazoo like some people literally deal with. Uh, I think it's pmdd which is like for like a week you get like a bunch of depressive thoughts and like you just don't feel like yourself and that could be like a like a p what do they call it?
Speaker 2:pms, like a symptom of symptom of PMS Right.
Speaker 1:But like there's there's so many different symptoms that you could be experiencing because of like your hormonal cycle. So just learning about like your hormones and like what goes on in your body can also help fuel your physical, like health and wellness journey. Because maybe you know like you're you're in the gym and like you're working out super hard, but like you're working out super hard but like you're not losing weight, it may not be like a problem that like you need to just lift more weight or like be in the gym longer, like you may also need to figure out a different problem.
Speaker 2:Clearly there's something internally happening. That's one thing on my goals for either this year probably end of this year I really, really want to invest into like functional health and like getting tests, like blood tests and a GI map and figuring out what's going on in my gut, because everything internally is. It's just crazy how much more information is being put out there now about your gut, health and your whole gi map and your system. Like it's just wild because it literally affects everything. It affects your mood, your hormones, like it's wild skin.
Speaker 2:Yeah, your skin, your hair, everything, how you're feeling, how bloated you are like. But people just want a quick fix but that's just not how it goes.
Speaker 1:One of the number one causes of disease like yeah, a headache is just inflammation in your brain, yeah, when you think about it. Or dehydration that too, or both, yeah seriously like or like super bloated or like all these things.
Speaker 2:You were talking about the digestive enzymes that I need to get on I started taking digestive enzymes, which has been a game changer because it's basically you take them before every meal and I take them with a probiotic too in the morning, but it just helps you break down the food in your stomach a lot easier. So I feel literally my stomach is flat after I eat. I don't feel as bloated. I don't feel as bloated, I don't feel like my stomach doesn't feel like heavy, if that makes sense. It's just like digesting properly. It's kind of it's freaking wild.
Speaker 1:I'm gonna need the link to that ASAP physician.
Speaker 2:Physician's choice is the brand um, but I can send you it. It's that you can get on Amazon or you can buy them in any store?
Speaker 1:yeah, did you buy them on TikTok shop? Yep, okay, send me your link. Okay, well.
Speaker 2:I'll get you, I'll get you like a dollar in commission perfect, but I feel like, um, the inflammation thing is huge for me this year, like I want to help, or I want to decrease the inflammation in my body and also the oliveta stuff too I was talking about that they have like internals, which, like I, take an internal skincare that has like collagen and stuff in it, but then there's also anti-inflammatory supplements as well. Yeah, I'm going to need all that, yeah.
Speaker 1:But that that, too, also goes along like hand in hand with like your goals changing. Because a while back before we were educated like our number one goal was like lose weight, like look skinny, all the things. And now we're like I want to feel good, I want to take care of the inflammation in my body, like I want to know about my cycle. It's just a more intelligent way to go about the whole process and like, once you focus on the things that actually matter, like everything will fall in line. Because of that.
Speaker 2:Yes, you know like we're going and we're chasing the right result and everything else will come from that yeah, period, watch shelby and I will be having a little farmette together with our chickens and our cows. Sign me up in the middle of nowhere with our land.
Speaker 1:The people that are subletting us the place also left us a little planter as well, with some basil and stuff in it and I was like you're so kind, he's like you can have some basil and like other things, like we just we have like enough, like back at our other house, like if you want it, you can have it shut up. Yeah, perfect for our vodka pasta, perfect, yes, fresh basil, fresh pasta. Of course I'd be making that shit myself.
Speaker 1:That's another thing, too, about health and wellness that I learned there's, like the I think we were talking about this last time the mthr gene. This is actually when we figured out the podcast stop recording the mthr gene or something like that.
Speaker 1:There's, I think it's like 50 I'm not a doctor like 50 of humans or more can't process like folic acid or like some type of like something along those lines, and it's in like uh pasta in in boxes on the shelves. So like, of course, when you eat a bunch of carbs, like if your body like doesn't have the gene to break it down, like you're gonna feel more weighed down, like your body can't process it in your, your gut or whatever, so it takes longer, and like your body feels more like leg down for a longer period of time because of that same with like white bread and like all those things like.
Speaker 1:That's why like obviously carbs like will weigh you down if you do have like or you consume a lot of them. But like I was like holy shit, like no wonder why people over in italy like don't feel gross and disgusting and bloated when they eat pasta because there's no like folic acid in it.
Speaker 2:That makes so much more sense now. Right, also, I figured out why I get like stuffy and like almost allergy symptoms when I drink wine, I guess. So my eyebrow waxer it. The same thing happens to her and she said she thinks it's like the sulfates in the wine. Oh, there's like certain like acids or sulfates in there that can cause like a reaction like that and that literally happens to me every time I drink wine, like last time.
Speaker 2:We recorded I was like I'm so fucking stuffy right now every time I drink that wine. Yeah, now it makes sense like I wonder, I wonder if the wine, though, in like italy or like in europe, doesn't have that, because everything there is just so much cleaner, I know. So I don't know if that's just like a thing that's in wine, I don't know. She said some sort of like acid, or if it's like the sulfates, I don't know what.
Speaker 1:I was the more you know, I know mind blown by that so getting curious about like things in your life, like, for example, for live, she was like getting stuffy every time she drank wine.
Speaker 2:It's like clearly like something's going on like your body is responding to this.
Speaker 1:Figure out why it's responding that way being aware that like things like that are going on in your body, like you actually need to pay attention to your body, but then also like researching it and like do yourself the due diligence to like figure out what's going on so you know how to proceed like healthier moving forward, because now you probably won't drink wine as much anymore.
Speaker 2:I'm not going to ever all spritz period which there is. What's in that?
Speaker 1:I think it's like champagne.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's like champagne, or like sparkling wine yeah, so it doesn't, that doesn't affect me, but yeah, that's straight up like riesling and the rescata fucking, I don't know, it's weird, wow. Anyways, damn the more you know the more aware you are of what you consume and how your body reacts will show you what works best for your body and what doesn't period okay, we're on our last one lady. I love it.
Speaker 1:Reflect and practice gratitude, oh I feel like this is such a good one to end on too.
Speaker 1:It's such it really is, Because you can honestly reflect and practice gratitude on like any of the things that we were talking about. But like, going back to journaling, that the reason why people talk about journaling so much when it comes to the like, self-growth space and like all this stuff is not just for fun, like as an activity. It really does help you organize everything that's going on in your brain and helps you to like accurately reflect because, like we were saying earlier, if you have all these things swarming on like in your head, like you don't know which one to focus on and like you're not really spending a lot of time in one specific area where, if you have to focus and concentrate on putting a pen to paper and writing out your thoughts, it keeps your stream of consciousness a lot more streamlined essentially and keeps you focused on what you're reflecting on, and I feel like more people need to practice journaling on a consistent basis, not only to get to know themselves, but then to keep up with themselves on a daily basis.
Speaker 2:Because then you can sit with yourself and and like be like okay, this is how I'm feeling. Oh, I didn't realize that was.
Speaker 1:You know, when you write it down and you're actually journaling, a lot of things come out of your brain that you don't think, that are like stored in there, if that makes sense Like you don't realize how much is going to like spew out when you're writing down things that have gone on or you certain when you you have like the thought process of like, okay, like I have this issue and then, but like part of you in your brain wants to ignore it, so like you're not gonna let yourself like dive deep into figuring out that issue and like sorting through whatever is like going on in your life because, like your brain, first and foremost its job is to like protect you and keep you safe.
Speaker 1:Obviously, if something's causing you anxiety, it's gonna want you to avoid it yeah, but the more that you keep avoiding it, the louder the noise is going to become in your brain and it's going to become like this annoying thing that's swirling in your head that's causing you all this anxiety. Just, it's okay to like feel your emotions like. It's okay to like confront yourself and to like sit in like an uncomfortable emotion, like like we were talking about. Emotions are part of being a human being, but you have to sit with it and put pen to paper and actually dive deep into what's going on, to actually get to the bottom of it, versus just letting it swirl around in your head you want to know.
Speaker 2:I don't know the exact statistic, but one of my clients brought up that there's a crazy statistic out there that they asked people like would you rather sit alone in a room with yourself for like not even that long of a period of time it was like 30 minutes. Sit alone with yourself for like 30 minutes to an hour or do this like crazy thing? I don't remember what it was. Ninety five percent of people said they would have done the crazy thing over sitting with themselves because they don't want to hear what's going on in their brain. Yeah, she actually said that to me. I think I had. That was like in the past couple of weeks this client said that to me and I was like what?
Speaker 1:That just shows you. You and I would be the 5%. For sure we would.
Speaker 2:But that just shows you how people don't want to tackle their emotions and things that they're going through in their head and they just bottle it up and repress it, probably because causes people don't even know how. Yeah, that's the thing too. There's like there's no education on how to process and manage your emotions damn, that really breaks my heart, I know I feel, like.
Speaker 1:If everybody knew, like a, how to recognize their emotions but then be like how to manage and work through them, this world would be so different than like what it is. It a lot of like. The hate and everything that like comes from. This world is solely based around the fact of like people don't know how to manage their emotions and manage themselves.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's kind of wild, yeah, wow. Well, also something going into practicing gratitude and reflecting is practicing forgiveness, which is something we talked about in our last episode. Reflecting is practicing forgiveness, which is something we talked about in our last episode. But being even if you're in a situation or you were in an environment that maybe caused you stress or made you hold some certain grudge, there's got to be something in that environment that had some sort of good to it. So, like being grateful for that environment and helping you grow into the person that you are and building character is what we'd like to say. But even like the negative, like experiences that you have, there's some good that comes from that and it makes you a better person and you can reflect on that and be grateful for that right.
Speaker 1:So you don't hold that grudge yeah, I mean, everybody's allowed to like feel their emotions. Like you can definitely be upset if somebody like hurt you, but then don't allow yourself to like ruminate in that energy, because the only person that's continuing to hurt themselves over this event is you, like if you keep allowing yourself to stay in that energy. But, like Liv said, there's good things that can come from adverse experiences, like, at the very least, you learned a life lesson, or you learn something about yourself, or you learn something about life that you can now take with you, where, if something similar or like the same thing happens again, or you like you find yourself in a situation that's comparable.
Speaker 1:You now have gone through a situation already that's like that, where you can handle it better yeah that's why, like your first, like romantic breakup is always so hard because you've never gone through it before. And then, as you date other people and like you go through the process, you're like, okay, this is actually just a part of finding my future person is like just accepting the fact that like somebody may not be your, your person and you need to walk away. That doesn't mean that you're any less of a person or that person is any less of a person. Unless, of course, they were abusive, then fuck them. But like yeah, you know what I'm saying. Like you're literally reading my mind.
Speaker 2:Yeah, like that's so real.
Speaker 1:Just if we wouldn't have gone through that, like those breakups with, like our first love, we literally would not be in the relationship that we're in today, right and we wouldn't like know enough about ourselves to know what we were looking for in a relationship, had we not like fell on our face and, like you know, made mistakes in past relationships and learned from them and and brought them to this relationship that's like the whole point of life, just like learning from your mistakes and reflecting on them and figuring out how you can become a better person from them.
Speaker 1:I think that's a great way to end it love, I love that that was so that was honestly better than our first one honestly, it was see, it was meant to be. It was meant to be, that was meant to happen. Yeah, oh my gosh, well close this out, baby yes, happy spring cleaning to everybody. I know that it's 5, 30, holy crap crap. How long have we been talking? I don't know. You got here at what Like 115? Damn Wow.
Speaker 2:I love that.
Speaker 1:I'm going to get my booty upstairs probably focus on what we're going to do for dinner. I'm definitely still going to spring clean a little bit today before the day is done. But thank you guys so much for listening to this episode. We're really excited to continue doing these.
Speaker 2:If you have any ideas for episodes, to definitely please let us know yes, if you have any questions, if you want any advice on anything like, literally reach out to us, we will be your guide.
Speaker 1:I feel like we could do another like ask live and shelby, because it's been like such a long time it has.
Speaker 2:I love those maybe we do that for the next episode. Will we have a guest soon? You just wait.
Speaker 1:It's actually in the works, guys.
Speaker 2:I know we've been saying it we have a date, we have a date set. We have two guests actually that will be coming on the podcast, which we're really excited about. So you just wait, get excited for that.
Speaker 1:We won't coming up, but yeah, I hope you guys have a great start of spring. Um, if you want to follow us on social media, on instagram we are at evolverrepeatthepodcast. I feel like I also need to bring the tiktok back as well. Yeah, you can start posting on there too. Um, my instagram is at theshallbelanae lives is at liveworth and her business page is at livedinstudio yes but we will see you guys, next time love y'all, bye.
