Unmasking Greatness
Join Fitness/LifeStyle Expert & Mentor Chris Kakouras talk about maximizing your health, business, mindset, and overall life! Let's get better together as I bring on amazing guest to interview and learn from!
Unmasking Greatness
Harnessing Positivity Amidst Life's Storms
Chris Kakouras shares a deeply personal story of resilience, one that starts with the harrowing night his family was told they might lose his father to stage four lung cancer. This episode invites listeners into Chris's world as he navigates the emotional upheaval of a loved one's illness, highlighting the strength drawn from family ties and the role of health and fitness in building a foundation for enduring life's unexpected challenges. Chris's journey is a testament to finding gratitude amidst turmoil and the transformative power it holds in shifting perspectives when the road ahead seems daunting.
Listeners will gain insights into the art of maintaining a positive outlook amid adversity, learning how faith in a higher power or the universe can anchor us during turbulent times. Chris emphasizes the importance of emotional management, advocating for acknowledging emotions without letting them dictate our decisions. Discover how physical exercise transcends its physical benefits to enhance mental clarity and stress relief, as Chris evolves his fitness motivations towards mental well-being. This conversation is a heartfelt exploration of understanding the "why" behind our actions, encouraging reflection and providing tools to maintain core values, even in the face of life's toughest trials.
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Welcome to Unmasking Greatness. I'm your host, chris Kikoris, a lifestyle fitness coach and mentor. This podcast is about unmasking your greatest potential, finding your purpose and crafting a life worth living. Health and fitness has been the gateway drug to all of my success. My continuous drive to keep learning and surround myself with other high achievers forces me to level up, which has developed my mind to something I never thought was possible. This podcast is here to share what I've learned and continue to learn with all of you. This is your sign to take back control of your health, mindset and personal environment. Strap in as we are recharged and always find value in the show. Please subscribe and share, as we can all get better together. Let's go.
Speaker 2:What's up, guys, welcome to another episode of Unmasking Greatness. I'm your host, chris Kikoris, and today I'm going to have a different conversation with you guys. This is this topic in general. I honestly I don't want to say I wasn't going to talk about it, but I just didn't know when and I feel like now I want to talk about it and I think what kind of set the whole thing off was.
Speaker 2:This past week, I put a post on my Instagram feed with a caption which I'll tell you here in a second, and it just got a lot of DMs, a lot of messages, texts that people know me personally reaching out, you know, just with just checking on me and how I'm feeling and things like that. And so if you know me personally, if you're a client of mine, you probably already know what I'm about to talk about. But to paint the picture for you the post, I'm actually sitting in a lobby and you just see my legs and then in front of me is this little like, little kind of table and my computer's open and I'm working. But while I was there, obviously, when I'm anytime I'm at at this area, I'm just like I'm always reflecting anyways, throughout the day, but basically I'm looking at my computer and the captions is this and I'm going to. I'm going to read this verbatim it says life is tough. Things happen that we can't control. I haven't posted much on this, but almost two to three months ago, my father got diagnosed with stage four lung cancer. Sure, I could get upset and ask God why, but that does no good. What does help is that I am able to drive my parents to Duke University for his chemo treatments and support. Where I can, I can do my best to make this journey as smooth as possible. So, instead of crying and asking God why, I thank God I'm in the position to be able to work and be there for my family. No matter the circumstances, perspective can define the way your world is shaped, and I left it at that, and that was probably the first time I've put something out publicly, and you know my father's been having health conditions since 20, 2019.
Speaker 2:He got basically went to the doctor one day and immediately they were just like you need to go home like out of nowhere, and what he has is basically like hardening of the lungs. There's no specifics on how that came about. A lot of people correlate that to being around asbestos at some point in time, but they can't fully say where it's from. It's just this is what it is. And they basically told him he had at the time. They told him he had like 20% lung capacity, which is just kind of wild and you know, it really like to keep the short as possible, because it was like this. I mean, it felt like forever.
Speaker 2:He ended up having to go into the hospital and you know his breathing he was on a breathing machine, wasn't doing good. They were doing all sorts of tests on him. At one point, uh, they basically told me my mom, my father, was in the hospital for like almost a month and at one point they were just like, yeah, he's probably not, he's probably not going to make it through the night, and that was. That was pretty tough. Um, yeah, I was hoping I was gonna be prepared for this conversation, be honest with you guys. But, um, so my mom came home, told me and my brother and we're already, like you know, basically calling um, you know funeral homes trying to start preparing for things, and you know it was just heavy. I mean, reality was really like hitting hard at that point and, by the grace of God, a miracle, I don't know, throughout the night, somehow he started to get better, um enough to where you know that it wasn't the end for him. And it became this full blown process since then of recovery. And since that time, you know, he came out, he went into physical therapy. They were just trying to build up some muscular strength because he went in walking and he came out not walking. And that's how fast muscle atrophy can happen when you're laid in a bed, you're not moving and you're not eating. And so and that's why I preach so much with the health and fitness thing Because if you have muscle to spare, if you built healthy muscle tissue, you have some wiggle room if something like this would happen, room if something like this would happen. And so he went through that process and things started to.
Speaker 2:His lungs can't get better. He got denied a lung transplant because his heart wasn't strong enough, because his heart was overworking, because his lungs weren't efficient. I mean, it's just like this whole big circle. And so all they can do is say you're going to be on this treatment, it's a testing, it's a medication that they going to be on this treatment. It's a testing, it's a, it's a medication that they're they're testing with at this point. It's not even proven to help and it's super expensive. It's very dangerous, in a sense that you can't miss a dose. It messes things up. I mean, it's just like a whole list of things. And so they're like we're just trying to make sure that it doesn't get worse, mitigate, that it will not get better. Once the lungs are damaged like that, they do not get better. It's just like let's just try to maintain it.
Speaker 2:So he's on oxygen at all times. They started building some strength. He went to rehab, physical therapy for that, and things started to look a little better. You know, outside. Sure, he's got to keep oxygen on him, but he got to the point where he could drive, where he could walk and be functional, and which is like all my dad really wanted, because that's all he did. He's worked all his life. He is a he's a workaholic. Um, he doesn't like to sit still, he's always getting into stuff. So when you get forced into retirement it can really like kind of crush your ambitions because it wasn't by choice. And so then my mother and my father went on a vacation to uh, charleston I think, and they went there the very last day. My father slips at the pool and breaks his hip, so back in the hospital and obviously there's a lot of risk because his previous conditions he had to have hip replacement surgery did that went to rehab again, so it was just like another setback and it was just kind of like one thing after another and so finally got back a little bit better, functional, walking, et cetera.
Speaker 2:And then here, most recently within the past three months, he went to the doctor and keep in mind, this is you're talking, we're talking beginning of December now October-ish is when they diagnosed him with stage four lung cancer, march. The prior March no signs of lung cancer, nothing. And that's how fast things progressed and how fast we had to move and he wanted to do his treatments at Duke university. So he gets chemo treatments every three weeks and I knew it was a lot for my parents and I said you know what you know, let me drive you guys up there, let me help, let me carry your machine. You know, help move luggage or whatever. You guys got going on.
Speaker 2:And it's been, you know, and and I know they, they appreciate that, you know and I know they appreciate that you know my mom's super stressed, she's stressed in general. So adding this on top of it is just like compounding on her. My father I think he just it eases him and makes things more enjoyable when I am there, and so I. It makes me feel good. You know I can't say that I've been the best son ever, but it doesn't mean that I have to stay that way. I can always do my part. They know I love them and I know they do. You know they love me as well. But with everything that's been going on, this is something that you know I don't really push out there and publicly a lot of it's just because I'm also super busy. I don't need like random people calling me people I haven't talked in like years checking up on me. I just don't want that. Nothing personal against them, it's just something that I just kind of avoided and I just kind of kept that kind of thing to myself.
Speaker 2:But after posting that post on social media I felt like a lot of you guys resonated with what I said. Some of you guys have family members that had lung cancer, some of you guys had family members with cancer in general, and so you know I say that and this is why I'm making this is that you don't have to suffer in silence. I think there's a lot of people that can relate, that's been through things. Some of you guys are currently going through it. Some of you guys have gone through it in that individual past. We even have a client right now that his father passed recently due to lung cancer. So there's a lot of relatability and things that we can. Just it's not that we can do anything about it, but we can know that, hey, if you need to talk, if you need somebody to listen to what whatever you have to say, then you know we're here for that. And it's a lot easier when somebody has, like, been there and done that, because they, they understand.
Speaker 2:And a lot of people are saying things like oh, they don't understand what I'm going through. You know, they, they think that they're alone in this journey and you, you put yourself on that isolated Island, because it's not that nobody understands, it's just you're, you're in the wrong destination, you're on the wrong Island. And so when you surround yourself with others that have gone through similar situations and hopefully have been made their way out of it, it can be super powerful to be around those types of people. And so I say all of this because I want to just talk about some of the things that I have, you know, gone through where my mental state is, and hopefully it will be able to help navigate some of where you guys are at as well.
Speaker 2:And, and the biggest thing, and one of the things I said in that post was about perspective. You know, your perspective on what's going on in your life can shape the way that you view the world Right, and so I say that because one of the things that I also said in that post, if you remember, is that many people will ask why? Like, why is this happening to me? Why do I have to go through this? Why this is not fair. You know why, god. You know if you're a believer or you believe in a higher power and you put everything in God's hands, then you could also blame him very easily for why things are going on and you don't understand.
Speaker 2:I'm a good person, I haven't done wrong, and I feel like that is the wrong way to look at things. You need to look at not why, god, but be thankful for the position that you are in, and that's the way that I had to reframe a lot of the things that's happened in my life, not why certain circumstances happened to me, but view it in a way that has a positive outlook in the future. Because in the current moment you don't understand, we're still kind of like shocked, we're still in the pain moment. You don't understand. You know we're still kind of like shocked, you know we're still kind of in the pain and the suffering. But you know, for me to give you some perspective, how I was thinking about this, I started thinking back, you know, when actually I was leaving the restaurant business, which is what my father was in, and if you've heard previous podcasts of me talking about this, I left because of me wanting to pursue, you know, my fitness career.
Speaker 2:But there was also a lot of underlying issues while I was leaving, because we were having conflicts. You know me, my father, my mom, like we were having some internal family conflicts. We didn't see eye to eye on a lot of things. There was just a lot of drama going on at that time. So when I left, it was not smooth, it was not easy. It was one of the hardest decisions of my life and it was quite painful as well from a mental and emotional standpoint and you know I fought through. But even then I said why does it have to be so hard? I feel like I know I'm doing the right thing. Why do they not care? Why do they not love me Like you? Just, you play all these things in your head and it's just. It can make it worse, you know, the more you start to ask those sort of questions and and they're all irrelevant, they're all things that I'm making up in my head because at the end of the day, I know they want the best for me. So you know I did that. I left right Tough, hard, you know, stressful, etc.
Speaker 2:If I would have never done that, if I would have never gone through that one, I wouldn't have the business that I have and the lifestyle that I have now. And two, I would not be able to help my parents the way that I'm helping them now. I would not be able to drive them up there. I would not be able to stay up there overnight with them. I would not be able to continue, you know, working wherever I'm at. I wouldn't be able to do all of those things.
Speaker 2:And so everything happens for some reason, whether you know what it is in the moment or not, and most of the time it is not in the moment. We have to reflect back on it and say that's why I went through that. And whether you're a believer in God or a higher power or whatever that is for you, I think it's important that you do have some sort of belief or faith in something, because if not, you can feel definitely lost. You need to know what you're doing. The universe, I mean if, even if you just believe in the universe, what you put out there is what you attract. So when you continue to do good, maybe bad things happen at a times, but there's a reason for it, and whatever that person or thing that you believe in, they don't put you in those positions if they know that you can't handle it.
Speaker 2:And so that's why I say, with perspective, we need to make sure that we shape it in a way that keeps us mentally strong, because I also know with my father, my father's a hard working person. As a matter of fact, that's all he did. All his life is work. He, what makes him happy is to see me do well, to be successful, of course, to be happy, but I think more so seeing me grow and expand and thrive. That's what he loves. So if you know something like this is happening to him and his health is declining, the last thing, the worst thing that I could do is shut down. The worst thing I could do is sob and cry and let my business fall, not take care of my clients, not take care of my family, all because I'm just in this emotional train wreck.
Speaker 2:And so I say that to many of you guys, cause I know like emotions are strong just because you feel certain ways doesn't mean that you have to act on them. It is okay to feel upset, sad, mad, angry and still not be acting on those emotions. I say this one to like a lot of people, like it's okay to be pissed off at somebody and just you really want to just like knock them out, but you don't have to physically go do that. Right, you can feel that way Doesn't mean you have to act on it, because there is going to be repercussions and consequences on that. So you know, outside of just perspective in itself, we need to control our emotions the best that we can.
Speaker 2:And some of the ways that's helped me be able to control my emotions is obviously knowing who you are to the core, like knowing you're a good person, knowing that you do good things, knowing that you're helping people and not for something else in return, like you know you're a good person, that that really makes things a lot easier. But if not, there's other things that has helped me as well, which is, you know, just just acknowledge the feelings, you know, don't block them out, don't feel like you can't feel a way. It doesn't mean that you can't. You know, cry if you need to cry. It doesn't mean if you want to go yell or scream outside, go do that Like it's okay. You know.
Speaker 2:I think having these feelings is what helps us know, like, what's what's good and bad, you know what's happy, what's sad. There's, there's always two ends of the spectrum and sometimes it just is. I heard one of my mentors tell me before you know why, why does it rain some days and why is it sunny some days? You know, some people are like I'm only happy when it's sunny, I'm only happy when, or I'm sad when it rains. The weather just is. You shouldn't change how you feel based off of something that just is. And so, again, just acknowledging that, hey, it will be sunny one day and it will rain eventually someday, knowing that it gives yourself permission. You know, without feeling like you're, you're judging yourself. Um, if you journal, that's a great way to get things out of your head and write it down, to express yourself. If you, if you need a therapist, if you have someone to talk to, that's great too. Um, but journaling is a great way If you don't have. If you have someone to talk to, that's great too, but journaling is a great way if you don't have.
Speaker 2:That I also like to, you know, with everything that's going on, that's why I'm, you know, I think the business part of things has helped me, because I'm very structured. I create goals, like you need to have goals, and if you don't, I would create small ones, little ones that you can accomplish that make you feel good. So, even on the days that feel very like heavy, uh, feel like things just aren't going the way that you're going, if you can actually do those things that you set those goals for, that can that can help lighten things up. And then, from a physical standpoint cause you know, you guys know I'm, you know, a fitness coach go for a walk, go to the gym. I can't tell you like that is the best therapy that you can do for yourself. Not only is it going to, you know, help you physically right, it's going to start helping you with your body and your physical attributes but mentally it is a huge game changer. But mentally it is a huge game changer.
Speaker 2:It's funny if you go up to people in the gym and ask them you know why they work out you're going to get a very different answer from someone that has just started, within the first six months to a year, versus someone that's been doing it 10 years plus. And uh, I have a good friend, tony Gonzalez. He was on the podcast too and I think he he had a post that went viral about this. But it's interesting to see you know those that are just starting. They are chasing you know initial physical attributes. They want abs, they want nice arms.
Speaker 2:Potentially it could be like I want to lower my cholesterol, things like that. When you've been doing it for 10 years plus, it's not for any of that because, more than likely, you've hit some sort of good stage with your health and fitness. You're happy with the way you look. So why are you still going? You're going because many of them will say I'm just, this is how I deal with life, this is my therapy, this is my me time, this is how I can, you know, just reduce all the stress that I have from life. So there's a whole nother side of it. And when you get there, that's when you have created a lifestyle.
Speaker 2:And for me, I mean, sure, I have physical goals that I do try to accomplish, but 100% I feel like the more stressed I get, the more I want to go to the gym, because it makes me feel better and helps me think clear and make good decisions for the rest of the day. So you know, whatever that is for you, wherever you are in your fitness journey, create those little small goals and remember your why. You know, this is the last one. I always remember my like why am I doing what I'm doing? How is this helping me? What benefits am I getting from this to help me in the future? And so whenever I'm struggling, I think about why I started.
Speaker 2:And for me, it's really just showing up for my family, my clients, myself, proving that you know I'm capable, that I'm strong and I never have a problem, right, people always like oh, the problem is, you know, the only problem is there's no such things as problems, they're only puzzles and when you put yourself in these conditions that challenge you over and over quote, unquote your problems, we always find a way out. Sometimes it's fast, sometimes it takes a really long time, but we always make through. And so I think it's really important that you reflect on these things, because you don't want to make permanent decisions off temporary feelings. You understand what I'm saying. So, like again, going back to your feelings, it's okay to feel a certain way, but those decisions that you make can be irreversible, and this is where a lot of suicide leads into, because people lose hope, they lose faith and they feel like there's nothing left and the only way to numb what's going on is to end it all. And so, again, a lot of this reflection, journaling, therapy, whatever you feel like you need is what you need to do, but those are the things that helps me, you know, go through.
Speaker 2:You know dealing with the stressful times, because you know I'm talking about family, but you want significantly versus from when I was a lot younger. So I go back to a lot of like the things that I'm talking about in health and fitness, because that's why I do what I do. You know it's taught me some truly like deep levels of life just through, like exercise, like that was the initial gateway drug but eventually it went down a rabbit hole and that's why a lot of our coaching is not just nutrition and working out. We're really heavy with mental, your mental state, building quality habits and and having a conscious understanding of life. Because life comes in seasons.
Speaker 2:If you don't know, things change all the time and this may be a little bit heavy to say in this podcast, but there's only one thing that you're guaranteed in life and that is going to come to an end at some point. So if you know that it's going to come to an end, how do you want to live it? Do you want the quality or do you want to suffer throughout the whole time? If you're going monotonously blind throughout your life, that's sad. That's a sad life to have. There's no joy and you're not going to be leaving anything for anybody around you to remember you.
Speaker 2:For. You know and it doesn't have to be you know financials. It doesn't have to be things like cars and houses and boats and things like that. You know it can be things that are more of a. This person was like the happiest person I ever met. Every time I saw him, it didn't matter what was going on. He always brought some energy to the room, always brought some, brought some joy to the room.
Speaker 2:You know, whatever that is for you, everybody's life is different. But without your health, like none of none of this quality of life is possible. I know my father would give everything, everything, to just get his lungs back, and that's not even an option on the table anymore, you know. So it's something that is invaluable, and so I say that for everybody. That's not even an option on the table anymore, so it's something that is invaluable, and so I say that for everybody that's listening if you are not taking care of your physical health, your mental health, you may not think it's important now, you may think that you're too busy, you may think that you want to put others first. Like maybe you're one of those parents that are like I feel guilty by taking time away from my kids because I want to go work out. It's not being selfish, it's selfless. You need to make sure that you show up the best parent, the best coworker, the best business owner. You need to show up at the top level because you are setting an example and a standard for everybody that's around you, and you can't do that unless you're taking care of yourself and everybody around you is watching you.
Speaker 2:A leader is not someone that just tells you what to do. It's someone that shows you how to do it, and do it good, damn good. And the only way to do that is to refine your craft and continue to work on yourself. So this is why I'm so passionate about what I do. You know these terms that I say like nutrition and fitness and mindset. These are not just these.
Speaker 2:You know buzzwords that are, you know, catchy, or you know hashtag words uh, their lifelines. You know this is the lifeline for you to have a life worth living, and if you're not prioritizing your health, I just I can't stress enough to just I urge you to start today. And if you don't know where to start, reach out to me. Uh, if you're going through something similar or just struggling in general with something and you feel again like you're alone, you're not, send me a message. You know I may can relate to you. I may not, but if I don't, I bet you I know somebody. I bet you I know somebody, and I think that comes with you know time and age and you just get experiences from that. So, again, you know, taking care of my, my health, my family, my business, like these are all ways for me to, you know, honor, you know my family and everybody else that's in my, my inner circle.
Speaker 2:So I wanted to share, give a little bit of context with that. I know this one's a little bit heavier, but I do feel like I'm hoping at least that some of the things that I'm sharing with you guys you can resonate with, and if you're not doing, some of the things that are helping me, maybe give it a try. I can't say that it's going to work for you, but looking at things from a different perspective, is is massive. Um, I I have, you know, I've worked with tons of clients. I've talked to tons of people. I have lots of friends too, and everybody deals with death a little differently. And for me, I am a. I will even say this I'm a little odd when it comes to to death. I don't like um, it's hard for me to like be around. I guess is the best way that I can say you know, I've, I've seen my, you know, my grandmother and my grandfather pass um, cancer kind of I don't want to say it runs in my family, but it is quite common.
Speaker 2:Um my grandfather, my grandmother on my father's side, my mother now has cancer. My father has cancer different types but cancer is not too far fetched in my family. So I am very particular and cautious with what I do. These are things that are unpredictable, and I say that because you need to take care of yourself. No matter what, at least you can mitigate it.
Speaker 2:Most people are like well, what's the point If you're going to get it anyways? Do you know that? And if you had the chance or opportunity to eliminate it, would you? I think being proactive is pretty smart. I think you just pushing it off and disregarding what's going on, I would say that's a disservice. And it's not just a disservice for you, it's a disservice for everybody around you, because if you are married and you have kids, these people are looking up to you and looking forward to spending good quality time with you.
Speaker 2:So you know, if you're drinking too much, where it's starting to hurt your health you smoke too much, it's starting to hurt your health, like there's an extreme to everything. But if you're on that extreme side, uh, it's time to it's time to put it down. You know, that's my word of advice to you. Can't force you to do it, but again, yeah, when it comes to death, I think, uh, we all handle it a little bit differently and so I don't want this to be a very like morbid podcast, but it's the reality. And so at this time, you know, I'll, you know I'm sure I'll kind of keep you guys up to date with how things go. But you know, my father has another scan in a couple of weeks. We'll see where, you know if the cancer has, you know, reduced his other health markers. He has some, you know. Obviously his lung issue is not going away. So you know I'll keep you guys posted with it.
Speaker 2:But I appreciate everybody that reached out to me. It means a lot. Again, even though I don't want my phone to blow up it does. Everybody that sends me a message I do care and I read every bit of it. I respond to everybody. So I appreciate you guys. I hope you have a good rest of the week. Again, if this resonates with you or you know somebody that is kind of going through this, share this podcast with them. Share it with them. You know, and I'm here to talk to anybody that wants to talk. I'm here to help anybody that wants the help. You're not alone and again, you don't have to suffer in silence. All right, I hope you guys have a good rest of the day. I'll talk to you later.