“It’s Not Just a Headache” – The Reality of Migraine Disease | Arleen Davis

Migraine disease is not “just a headache.” It can take your vision, your balance, your words, and leave you trying to explain something invisible while the world minimizes what you’re going through.

In this powerful and unfiltered conversation, we sit down with Arleen Davis, who joins us from China, as she shares her chapter, “Migraine Disease, My Journey of Discovery.” What begins as unexplained symptoms—dizziness, sensory overload, nausea, and cognitive confusion—quickly turns into a frightening reality that mimics serious neurological events.

Arleen opens up about:

• Sudden vision loss and terrifying migraine attacks
• Hemiplegic migraine symptoms that can feel like a stroke
• Brain fog so intense that words disappear mid-sentence
• The long road to diagnosis and being dismissed along the way
• Why women’s health concerns are often minimized

We also dive into real-life migraine triggers and management, including weather changes, barometric pressure, light sensitivity, crowds, and motion sickness, and how proper diagnosis, preventive medication, and support can change everything.

If you’ve ever been told “it’s just a headache” but felt something deeper was wrong… this conversation might give you the language, validation, and direction you’ve been searching for.

✨ Your story matters. And sometimes, hearing someone else’s is what finally helps you understand your own.

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If this conversation stirred something in you… good. That’s where change begins.

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I’m Julie Fairhurst, and this is where stories turn into power.

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Transcript

Welcome From China And Story Setup

SPEAKER_01 0:14

Well, hi everyone, and welcome to another episode of Women Like Me Stories in Business. I'm your host, Julie Fairhurst, and I am so excited to talk to Arlene Davis today. Now, she is talking to us from China. She's in China with her husband after work there. And so I met her online. She joined our Women Like Me community. And the next thing you know, she is writing in our brand new chapter book. So Arlene is in chapter 10. And the title of her story is Migrain Disease, My Journey of Discovery. And oh my goodness, what a what a story. So welcome, Arlene. Thank you so much for doing this. So first of all, I didn't realize when I read your story. I mean, personally, knock on wood, I haven't had a, I've had headaches, but I've never had a migraine. But I know some people that have, but I didn't realize that it was a disease.

SPEAKER_02 1:25

Yeah, yeah. A lot of people don't. Unfortunately, I shouldn't say unfortunately, it's just it's just that people who don't have migraines don't understand that migraine is not a headache. Migraine is a neurological disease. And there's been a lot of new findings in the past 10 years about migraine, and they continue to find new things and understand new things about migraine as research continues. Migraine is a can be for some people a full body experience. It certainly has been for me from time to time. It can change its course over the years. It can come on when you're younger, it can come on when you're older. It's, you know, it's on a spectrum, like a lot of diseases. It's on a huge spectrum. But yeah, it is not just a headache as a lot of people think that it is, um, which is why there is such stigma around migraine, because people just don't understand that you can't just take a pill and get rid of the pain. Right. Because for some people, it's not even pain. For me, for example, when I get a migraine, often I don't have pain. Sometimes it's all the other neurological symptoms that I get. Yeah. I get dizzy, I get I get hot, I get sensitive to light, I get sensitive to sound, I get sensitive to just things around me, the the motion around me, the I get irritable, I get I, you know, food tastes funny, I get hungry, I get not hungry, it's just you know, my body but you don't have a headache.

SPEAKER_01 2:54

Right, but I don't have a headache.

Years Of Misread Symptoms

SPEAKER_02 2:56

Right. So that must have been so confusing all those years. It definitely has been. It definitely has been. It definitely started out, like I say in my story, it started out connected to the premenstrual syndrome. Right. And so I definitely thought it was that. That's what we all thought it was. So we treated it as such. And then I was diagnosed with ulcerative colitis when I was 30 after my first child. And I think I thought it was a lot to do with that. And then, you know, it just kind of continued on its cycle on its on the spectrum, and other things kind of came in. I got really dizzy. Um, I went through a stage where the dizziness settled in, and then I thought it was vertigo. And so, you know, I just like, oh, I have vertigo, I have vertigo, I have vertigo. And I would wake up and get out of bed and like go down the hallway like this, and you know, go into the bathroom and like, oh my gosh, like I almost fell over into the toilet and yeah, such. And then after that, I would be like, oh no, I feel nauseous, and then oh wait, I would get that like a sinus-y kind of pressure and the pain. Then I would think, oh no, it's it's a sinus, it's a sinus headache, it's a sinus infection, it's this, because then your nose would drip.

SPEAKER_00 4:04

Right.

SPEAKER_02 4:05

That's another sign of or another symptom of of migraine. You're you can have like a sinus discharge, nasal discharge, sorry. Yeah, but it's not a sinus infection because a sinus infection, it's green, and you know, you can see in your nose. But with migraine, it's clear. And so I always okay, sinus. So if you know, take some sinus medication, you might get rid of some of the sinus pressure, but you're not getting rid of the sinus or sorry, the nasal drip. And so I thought it was that, and then I'd end up in bed with the pain, you know, and just it was just uh just one thing after another after another after another. And then eventually it was like, okay, now I've you know did the research, did the research, did the research, and realized I was actually suffering from migraine disease.

Brain Fog And Cognitive Changes

SPEAKER_01 4:47

And wow, yeah. The thing that I really what really struck me when I was reading your story is how it would affect your judgment as well. And some of oh my goodness, yeah. Yeah, like it's almost like you went crazy for a little minute or two or days, or days.

SPEAKER_02 5:11

Honestly, it's funny. Um, I recently met, well, I've I've known this woman for a while. Um, she's she's not a colleague of mine, but she's a colleague of my husband's. I recently was talking to her about migraines, and she also suffers migraines, and she has very similar symptoms to me, and we just connected on this. And she was saying the same as me that you you go into this cognitive fog because migraines, it's I can't remember the science around it. I'm not very good with details at all. That's okay. It does it, it so it's a neurological disease, so it does affect your brain. And so what happens is it it does something to like the way your brain, like it does something to the neuroscience of your brain and and whatnot. People who are listening to this and have that background are gonna be like, it's this, this, this, this, this. Right now, I can't think of the science. That's okay. Anyway, so the days leading up to it and sometimes the days coming out of it, and certainly the days during it, it's you just can't think. You go into this fog and your words come out backwards. It's like you have dyslexia when you talk or dysprax dyspraxia or dysphhrasia, and just yeah, you think about that. Yeah, anyways, it's like you can't think straight. Words will not come to you. Your words will come out jumbled, they'll come out the wrong way. You'll be talking and you'll you'll you'll be thinking of the thing you want to say, and you'll be mid-sentence, and all of a sudden it's like just the a wall comes down in front of you, and it's like all of a sudden your sentence gets cut off, and you're like, I can't think of what uh what I was gonna say next. Wow. Yeah, and it's just like you just can't think. And it's so frustrating. It's frustrating when you're with your family, it's frustrating when you're at work. It's just it's embarrassing because you know, you'll be with other people who are very intelligent, and you know you're intelligent, you know you're smart, and you just feel like such an idiot, you feel like such a fool because you know you know what you're talking about, but you don't feel you don't feel it, you've you feel like you've lost your mind, you feel like you've lost the ability to be intelligent, you feel like you've lost the ability to talk about anything. Like I know I've done all this research, I know all these words, but right now I can't think of them. Wow, and I know like yesterday I was out, it's been rainy. That's a trigger. The air pressure is a trigger, anyways. There's been stuff going on in the last few days, and I know I'm coming into a mind grain because I've I've felt the symptoms, and so I know my brain is a bit off today. And so I had some notes that are on the device that I'm with you on. That's the one that was able to connect. So I don't have them in front of me. Yeah, so um, yeah, so I'm not able to find those words today. So that's that's just the way that it goes. Wow. So yeah, things like that, but even being able to find simple words. So it's like it's similar to menopause when women go through menopause and they and they hit that brain fog apart. When you're like, I saw a funny video the other day, and it's like, I need you to go do that, you know, that stuff that you bring home from school, and you have to do it, you have to, you know, you have to take it back to school so your teacher can correct it. That that stuff, what's it called? And the kids like, my homework, yes, can you please go do that? You know, simple things like that, or you know, go pick up that thing to put words on paper. What's that thing called? A pencil, yes. Can you go get the pencil, please? Like things like that, and just like yeah, your words will not come to you, and it's yeah, you just you feel defeated, you feel like yeah, it makes you it really lowers your self-esteem at the moment.

SPEAKER_01 8:54

The scariest thing I read when I was, of course, when when I was reading your story was you were wake, you woke up in the middle of the night and you couldn't see.

Stroke-Like Symptoms And Finally Tests

SPEAKER_02 9:05

Yeah, like how terrifying that must have been. Oh, the first time, oh my goodness, I wow, I was in China the first time it happened, and I was on the coach because I was having a migraine, and so I decided to I get up in the middle of the night, and you sometimes when I have a migraine, I have to I have to move. I just have to like I just I can't lay in bed, I don't like the way it feels. That's another thing. It's like it's type thing the way things feel on. So I just I had to pace. And so I got up in the middle of the night and I was pacing. And when I was ready to go back to sleep, I decided to lay down on the couch, fell asleep. And when I guess when I woke up a couple hours later, I'd say it was probably like two o'clock, three o'clock in the morning. I woke up and I opened my eyes and couldn't see anything. So I was like, okay, you just you need to like rub your eyes or whatever, like you just haven't adjusted. And we had a big long window in like a big tall window in our living room. And I thought, oh, maybe the curtains aren't open. And I thought, no, that's not right because you there's always light peeking in, right? So I'm trying, that's not right. So it's like, so I tried and I just adjusted, and all of a sudden it dawned on me that it's nothing to do with the environment, it's my eyes, like I can't see. And the panic set in. And so I knew where I was, and so I kind of made my way around, and I was just like, holy crap, like I can't see. What am I supposed to do? And I knew I had a migraine, and so I sat and just kind of like thought about it for a minute. I tried to be like rational and practical about it, sort of thing, and not panic. And so I sat there and kind of like just I just closed my eyes and tried to think calmly about it. And it came back, like it started to come back within probably three or four minutes. So I didn't freak out, I didn't yell scream because we had both of our daughters with us at the time. And so it kind of came back. So I went to bed with my husband and was like, honey, like I just like I was just blind for a couple of minutes, and he was like, whatever, have to sleep. And and so I just thought, just go back to sleep and deal with it in the morning. Because that's I don't know why, but that is always my mindset. Yes, yeah, which is not smart, it's not, it's not a good thing to be like that, but I I it's who I am. So, anyways, I never I never had I never did follow up with it, which is I'm gonna say right now, don't ever do that. Don't ever, ever do that to anybody who ever listened to this podcast. Don't ever do that. But I think it's because I was here in China, I felt fine the next morning. My mom has had a similar episode. She doesn't believe she has migraines, she believes that herds are sinuses because she's had sinus polyps removed and she's always had sinus issues her entire life, and she's had trigeminal neuralgia and she's had operations for that, and operation, not more than one, and things like that. And so she's she believes she has sinus issues, and that's that's that for her. So she's had a blind episode as well. And so in my head, I was just kind of like I'm not gonna worry about it. Like it went away, I have no pain, I have no other symptoms. It's a one-time thing. I I Googled it, of course, because you know, that's what modern day, that's what we all do. We also agree to the doctor. Yeah, and it was like, yeah, that's that can happen with migraines. And so I was having a migraine at the time. So I just I I let it go with that. And so I'd been to the doctor here either before or after that, and decided, no, it must have been after that, and you know, tried to address the migraine thing, and it just didn't go anywhere. And so I was just kind of frustrated and thought, well, forget it, I'll I'll just deal with it later. And so, because of our international insurance, because we're here in China, we're non-residents of Canada, so we can't access the Canadian health system without you know filling out forms and you know, all that kind of stuff. It's just it's that's a bit frustrating. Yes. So, anyways, moving forward, had another episode in Canada a couple of years ago, and that one didn't scare me because it had happened before. And so I was at my friend's house, our house being was being ripped down and rebuilt, and so I was living at my friend's house up the road from our where our house is, and I'd had a really bad episode of migraine, my body was going um down my left side and things like that, and that can happen with migraine as well. It mimics stroke, it's called a hemoplegic migraine. And like the dominant didn't know that, but I could barely make it home in the car, and we got to replace course. I was panicking on the inside, but holding it together on the outside because that's what us women do. We yes, that's right. I'm fine, I just need to be in a quiet space, and so I did all that, and then I thought, no, I'm gonna go lay down, like I need to lay down. And so eventually I had something to eat and went to bed and slept it off, and so woke up in the middle of the night in their basement, and everything's pretty black. But they're dark, they have a dark basement, and there's one little window where there's a bit of light. And I thought, gosh, it's really dark down here. And I've been awake in the middle of the night in their basement before, and I thought, no, it's dark. So I closed my eyes and I thought, is it that dark? Because I thought, is it that or is it that I'm having a blind episode? And so I opened my eyes and I I like I looked around and I thought about it and I thought, no, I can't see anything. And so I knew enough to like really check around. And like there was no doubt in my mind. I was I was blind again. Again, having a really I was having a really bad migraine. And so I decided to go back to sleep. And I laughed because it's not funny at all. Again, don't ever do this, please get up and get help and go to the hospital. But I laugh at myself because again, I made the stupid choice, and I'm gonna say stupid because it was a stupid choice, to just go back to sleep and deal with it in the morning. Because again, in my in the back of my head, I had this intuitive feeling, and I I trust my gut intuitively. That's a whole other side of my life, but I intuitively I just knew that nothing was wrong, that it wasn't migraine, and I thought I'm going back to sleep and I'll see how I feel in the morning, which is what I did. I got up and I was telling my my friends about it for over our coffee in the morning, and they're looking at me like, Are you crazy? Like, you need to go to the hospital. And I'm like, Yeah, I probably should. And like I was feeling a bit like numb in my face and stuff. And they're like, Will you please go to the hospital? And I'm like, Yes, I will. And like, are you gonna drive yourself? And I was like, Yeah, I feel fine. But of course, then the panic was setting in. And then I was like, of course, right? So I got myself to the hospital, and the doctor took one look at me and was like, Why did you not come to like and then it was just like, well, now I feel like an idiot for not coming in. So, anyways, got there, everything was fine. They did the MRI, CT scan, and all that, and there was nothing abnormal at that time. But they're like, that doesn't mean something didn't happen. But in the moment, there's nothing. So I was very fortunate because that got me into a neurologist's clinic that they have on Fridays in New Brunswick at a it was a St. John in New Brunswick, their regional hospital or city hospital, whatever, the the main one. The neurologist has a clinic on Fridays for like it's a stroke clinic. And because they couldn't rule out a stroke, they were like, We're gonna get you into this clinic. And so the next day, so that afternoon, I had a CT scan, MRI, whichever one it was, I can't even remember now. And they got me into that clinic the next day. And that's the first time I'd ever seen a neurologist for migraines. Wow. And that was two years ago, and it was just like it was like I was in the right place at the right time. Yeah. Actually, that's not what I believe. I believe I was meant to be there. Like that's that was my journey. Of course, and that's where I was meant to be, you know, like that's just the way it was happening. And so she didn't think I had a stroke, she couldn't rule it out, but she thought it was migraines. And so we went from there. I've started medication, which you know helps, I think, a bit. But I have a board of medication now for that, which helps 99% of the time, unless I have a pounding headache. Yes.

Marriage, Parenting, And Carrying Guilt

SPEAKER_01 17:12

Wow. You know, the the the the frustration, like when I would read your story, just the frustration of of all those years that you're dealing with all of this. Yeah, you know, and and talking about even that one time, I can't remember where the were you out of school or you went into the building and then you you you stuck it out as long as you could and then had to just get out of there because you were just so feeling so terrible. How was it, how, how did that did it affect your marriage at all? Like, like yeah, because you can't see. Like it's not like you have a broken arm or you're, you know, or something like that. So it's it's um, it must have been hard on him as well.

SPEAKER_02 17:59

I have an amazing husband, I have to say. He has always 100% supported me and has been kind and caring and loving and has always, you know, what can I what can I do? Has always wanted like he's a fixer, like what can I do? How can I help you? Kind of thing. But I've always felt like such a burden, like because it's always like and I think it's my own projection on to I think I'd project that on to him, like now I'm the burden because now we can't go do this because here now I have a headache. So oftentimes I would push through the pre-stuff, knowing full well what's coming. I would push through that, yeah, knowing what happened when I did push through it so that we could do things, yeah, sort of thing. Yeah, and I would do that so that he or they, and we have two daughters, wouldn't miss out on things.

SPEAKER_00 18:56

Yes, yeah, right.

SPEAKER_02 18:57

But you do that as a mom, right? Like you just you you would do it whether it was a migraine, if it was you know, a cold, if it was a broken arm, if it was it, it doesn't matter what the illness or the symptoms are, you you do that, right? Yeah, not just as a mom, but as a as a parent, as a a carer.

SPEAKER_01 19:16

Oh, of course, of course, of course. And you talk about that in your story. You talk about, I think were you going to the beach or a park, and I think they had to turn around and take you home.

SPEAKER_00 19:28

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 19:29

That must have been so hard for you and the girls, yeah. For you too, like the guilt and all of that that comes along.

SPEAKER_02 19:35

Yeah, yeah. And I mean, the girls and I have had times when when we've been out, and and I remember there was another time in Qatar, I had them out at a mall. Malls are a big thing in Qatar, and we were having a really good time. And I remember we sat down to eat, and I wasn't feeling well, and I thought, I just need to eat, I just need to eat. But my head was kind of in that wobbly stage, and I knew something was off. And I guess I that at that stage of the migraine thing, I guess I didn't realize that that was the pre-attempt of stuff. And we sat down to eat and it just wasn't going away. And I thought, I need to go home, and I didn't want to give in to it. But on the drive home, everything just started to like wobble, and and it was everything I could do to hold it together to get us home. Wow. And it's like, and so it's that guilt of I put us all in danger. Yes. And if you've never been to Qatar, driving there is not safe. It's pretty wild. Yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure. It's just like, you know, so then there's that that guilt of like I should have never gone out in the first place, right? But I didn't know. Like, no, of course when you're driving home, I'm feeling like I may have to pull over and either throw up or you know, yeah, roil my pants or whatever the case is gonna be. So I got the window down, we got the radio blasting to keep me aware.

unknown 21:04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 21:05

Because you feel like you're gonna lose your consciousness. Not like not cast out, but you just feel like you're gonna lose your ability to even be aware of what is happening. Wow. Wow. And so, you know, I got us home and we were fine because it was it's like a 30-minute, 40-minute drive from where we lived into the like the main area there. Yeah, and like things like that would happen, like with the migraine, and it just it was awful. Things like that.

Validation, Medication, And What Improves

SPEAKER_01 21:29

That is that's terrible. So once you got the diagnosis, did anything change? So that was two years ago. You're saying you were two years ago. Yeah. Uh was it two years? Yeah, two years ago. Okay. So what changed did it make it like like was it just thank goodness now? I know.

SPEAKER_02 21:49

So I know what I think. The biggest thing that changed is what I felt like I could take some of the responsibility off of me. That was a big thing that changed to me. It just felt like such a relief that someone acknowledged the fact that what I already knew, what what I was telling people was real, right? Because I was basing it all on everything that I found out, everything that I felt, everything that I confirmed on Google. You know what I mean? The all the research papers. Because it wasn't just what I, you know, Googled. It was like I went to research papers. I I taught I did talk to a couple of doctors about it. And they like they were like, yes, you likely have this, but they weren't they weren't neurologists. You know what I mean? And they weren't able to give me medication for because they didn't actually there was one doctor who tried to give me what are they called? I can't remember the name of the medication. Anyways, and at the time I wasn't willing to take it because I didn't, I was afraid it was going to interfere with the medication I take for ulcerative colitis. And they didn't understand that at the time. Right. And because of my own fear and anxiety over it, we anyways. Yeah. That was in the past. But yeah, it was it was a huge relief. It was like finally I have this professional, like this neurologist who's who is giving me validation. That's the word I'm validation. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 23:09

Yeah. You know, I'm real. I spoke with a lady a few days ago. I did a podcast with her, and she went on a trip to Europe and ended up getting bit by a tick. I didn't realize it at the time, what happened, but she got very, very sick. And then it was six to seven years of doctors. She was so weak that she would have to sit down to make a sandwich. Like just to get up. Yeah, she was a better person. And I thought, and and so yours is very, you know, similar to that. Like that, I I can't imagine, thank goodness I haven't experienced this kind of trauma with my body, but it must be just so frustrating to go through something where people don't really understand it. And she had a lot of people saying, Well, you know, maybe you know, you need to get out of the house, you need to get more exercise, you need to do this, you need to do that. And she just couldn't because she was so sick.

SPEAKER_02 24:14

Just so did a doctor here tell me I just needed to get 30 minutes of exercise and get more oxygen to my brain.

SPEAKER_00 24:21

Yeah, yeah. And I'm like, really? Yeah, yeah. Okay. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 24:28

Like well, and yeah, just um very, very half. I you know, I I actually I now that I think about it, I have a sister that has fibromyalgia and the same thing, a lot of lot of trouble, a lot of struggles going through trying to get that diagnosis, like something's wrong. I don't know what it is, but I'm something's wrong with me. That's such a hard thing to diagnose.

SPEAKER_02 24:49

Oh, it was because the symptoms overlap with so many other things. And I think the same thing with migraine, because migraine can affect your whole body. And I mean, some of the symptoms that I've had overlap with with perimenopause. And so honestly, lately, when I've been looking at that, I thought maybe it was just perimenopause. Like maybe that's all that it was. But then I think, well, no, because some of these symptoms started long before. But you know what I mean? Like your head just goes down that road. And maybe, maybe it wasn't that, maybe it was this. But all I know now is that with the medication that the doctor, the neurologist gave me, the preventative medication, I think has definitely lessened the impact. Yeah. I don't know if it's lessened the the the number of times I'm I'm I'm experiencing it, but the abortive medication is like like I can take that within 30 minutes. It's like uh I can I can have eight to ten hours, and sometimes it just takes it away completely. Oh well, that's good.

SPEAKER_01 25:51

So you catch it if you catch it in time. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 25:55

Which is nice. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 25:56

Yes, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 25:56

And sometimes, like I said, it doesn't, it depends on what kind of if it's the kind that comes in behind my eye, then yes, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 26:04

Well, I have I have a newfound um appreciation and understanding of of migraine because again, I just thought migraine people that had migraines had really bad headaches. But when you start to describe all of those symptoms, it's it's it it takes over your life.

SPEAKER_02 26:26

It does. It takes over your life because you're always it's originally I wanted to call the story something about the stalker, but I felt like that's too negative. Oh, I did like that idea of the negative, but that's honestly what it feels like. You're always like constantly on guard of am I going to get a migraine? Like every time I think about leaving the house, I have to think about is it sunny out? Is it going to get sunny out? Do I need my sunglasses? You know, do I need to bring a hat? Because I find it's the sun that comes down this way that affects me more than sun coming directly at me. And so then I think about okay, are we going downtown? So we live in Nanjing, China, but we live outside Nanjing. So we take the subway down. So are we gonna go down? Are we taking a DD? So a taxi, or are we gonna take the subway? Well, if we're taking a DD, you never know what kind of driver you're gonna get. Often the drivers here would do the stop start thing, stop, starts. Oh yeah. Am I gonna get nauseous? Do I have ginger casts with me? Yes, you know, things like that. How long are we gonna be out? What is the weather gonna be like? If we're gonna be out for a long time, am I gonna be able to handle that? Because there's always a you know, there's nine million people who live in Nanjing. So there's gonna be a lot of people out in the boat. Is it gonna be, is it gonna be too much, sort of thing? So I always I have to think about all of that. Am I gonna have a migraine? I have an issue with committing to a date for anything, and I've had this issue for a very long time, and it's only dawned on me in the in the last like probably year that the reason I have that issue is because of my migraines. I hate to commit to anything because that means I have to anticipate, I have to have that anticipatory anxiety of whether or not I'm gonna be able to make it because of anxiety. Yeah, I don't want to commit to what are we doing on the weekend? What are you doing tomorrow? What are we doing for supper tomorrow? Because I might really want steak tomorrow, but I might wake up with migraine and have to have applesauce and a pizza toast.

SPEAKER_00 28:25

Yes, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 28:26

I know there's no planning. There's no I can't plan for anything. And I think that affected our family as well because yeah, I've always had to go, I'm sorry, I can't do that. Yeah, that's I know we I know we plan that guys. I'm I'm so sorry we can't. And you know, that that hurts. Yeah, hurts them and it kills me. Kills me as a mom, kills me as a wife. Like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Writing Her Story And Why It Matters

SPEAKER_01 28:57

Well, I think it's great that you've got a diagnosis at least, because then at least now you know a hundred percent what you're dealing with. And and yeah, it's quite the story. So everybody you should read her story because it's quite an amazing story. So, Arlene, while I've still got you, what about the writing process? Uh, the writing process. Yeah, tell tell us about that. How was that? How was that writing your because is this the first time is this the first story you've written or have you written before?

SPEAKER_02 29:31

Okay, so I I wrote my first story that I wrote was with you again, Julie, in the first one. The what was the title of that book? Oh, that's right, that's right. The Wild Women Rising, the sacred Yes, and didn't you call it Stalker in that one? No, that one was I know. Sorry, I there's so many. I'm sorry, and I'm sorry too because of my my my memory is not very good. Yeah, that one was called Let me look, let me look, let me look. Where is it?

SPEAKER_01 30:13

I forgot you wrote in that book.

SPEAKER_02 30:16

I almost did too, to be honest. That one was Well, the moon rising. I'm looking. Oh, that was about me being pregnant and I how much I didn't enjoy it.

SPEAKER_01 30:32

That's right. That's right. Now I remember. Okay, I know the story now.

SPEAKER_02 30:37

And that one was very raw. That was a raw writing piece because I wrote that in the the day because you were looking for someone to fill that last spot in the book. And I was like, That's right, and I've been wanting to do the writing, and I had already contacted you. Yeah, and I was like, I'm gonna do it. And I had 12 hours because of the time difference. Yes. And I was like, and I already had a little bit written about it, and so I just finished it up and I only edited it myself. And let me tell you, it's raw. Yeah. And so I'm not a writer, it's not my background at all. I have a background in mental health, community mental health support. I worked in so community mental health support as a we, oh my goodness, see, my brain is snapped. Yeah, that's okay. That's okay. I worked in Ontario as a mental health case worker for people with serious mental health issues for 10 years. And then I I stayed in that sort of field for another three or four years, and then when we moved overseas, I I got into the field of education and worked with English second language and then teaching kids to read, teaching students, I should say, because it wasn't just small children to read. And so that's kind of was my career. Yes. And I loved every minute of all of it. Um challenging as it has been. So when so when I decided, but I've always wanted to tell my story because there's there's there's been a lot. Yes. And so this was such an opportunity to to to jump off that to jump off that ledge, to just to just bite in and and and do it. So I thank you for that opportunity. I think what you do is amazing. And I've shared this with everybody, the fact that you're out there and that you're doing this for women, you know, women supporting women, I I love that you do this. Um so thank you for doing that for for women.

SPEAKER_01 32:26

Well, I appreciate it. Thank you. I love doing it. Love doing it. Yeah, yeah. And you know, the best thing about doing it is now your story is out there, and so if there's somebody, another woman, or even a guy, you know, that is struggling with something similar to what you had, you can be that light.

SPEAKER_02 32:47

Exactly.

SPEAKER_01 32:48

And they no longer feel alone and yeah, and I think a lot of people, you know, a lot of times women, I've had lots of women who've said, oh, well, you know, my story's like no big deal. Yeah. But the thing is, is that it is a big deal, and there is somebody out there, somewhere out there, somebody needs to hear it. So I appreciate you for diving in and getting it done because I know how difficult it is. But it it it's um it's fabulous. I think you did a really great job. And I think that it really, as as I read it, of course, I was working with you through the process, but when I sat down for my final read of it, I was just like, wow, like this is amazing that somebody went through all of this not knowing what was wrong. You know, so I think that that's yeah, that's spectacular. And I hope that you go on to write more because you actually write very well. Yeah. Thank you.

SPEAKER_02 33:48

Thank you. Yeah, I definitely will be working on my my writing craft.

SPEAKER_00 33:52

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 33:52

So it's something I want to perfect, not perfect. I just, you know, I I understand that I mean, I'm never going to be, you know, an elegant writer. That's not who I am. I'm not, I'm not ever going to pretend to be that, but I definitely have lots of things to talk, to talk about, to write about, to share. I have a very spiritual side of me that I want to talk about, that I want to share, that I think is important. Wonderful. And yeah, that has helped me get through a lot of this stuff.

SPEAKER_01 34:21

Well, and you've traveled all over and not just traveled, you've lived in some very unusual places in the world.

SPEAKER_02 34:29

Yeah. So we live, well, we lived in in Qatar and we've lived here in China. So those are the two places that we've in Canada, of course.

SPEAKER_01 34:35

In Canada. Don't leave on Canada.

SPEAKER_02 34:39

Of course, of course, in the Maritimes. Yes, yes. Yeah. And they've each they've each held a very um, you know, they've each been very important to us, you know, as as individuals, as families. So yeah, so yeah, they've provided some real balance in our lives. Oh, for sure. Yes, for sure.

SPEAKER_01 35:03

Okay, well, I want everyone to know that this is the book. It just came out. It's women like me, the spaces, the space between before and after. So that space in the middle where you're going through it, you haven't quite got there yet. And Arlene is in chapter 10 in the book, Arlene Davis. So pick it up, have a read, and and reach out to her. Let her know what you think. And if you have any questions, you know, reach out to her. So, do you have any any final words of encouragement that you'd like to leave the audience with?

SPEAKER_02 35:41

Two things. If you are suffering with migraines, I encourage you to uh to look into two things. Number one, the study coach. I think she's amazing. She doesn't just talk about dizziness, she also talks about how to uh address is this a book or someone online? No, this is someone online. Oh, and what's it called again? The study coach. I think she's fantastic. She just gives some really good kind of hands-on, tangible uh information about how to deal with dizziness, but it it's very uh adaptable to different things about how to how to address like pain or other symptoms kind of thing. It's just very tangible. I really like it. It's very it's very grounded and very just really good. So I would I would encourage you to look into her, the SIN coach. The other thing, yes, reach out to me if you ever we want to discuss migraine symptoms. I think there's so much, there's so much good information out there. Um anyways, the other thing is if you've ever thought about writing, do it. Just do it. Pick up that pen, pick up your computer, your typewriter, whatever it is, and just do it. Don't be afraid. Yeah, your story is worth it, I promise.

SPEAKER_01 36:57

Absolutely. Oh, oh, that just got me in the heart. That's a good one. Thank you for that, Arlene. I appreciate it. Thank you. Okay, well, thank you for having me, Julie. This was the thoughts.

SPEAKER_02 37:09

I was really nervous this morning, but I'm so glad I did it.

SPEAKER_01 37:11

Oh no, I'm no, I'm so glad you did it. This is gonna be fabulous, and it's gonna help many people out there. So thanks again, Arlene, and all of you out there who have been watching or listening to this episode of Women Like Me Stories and Business. We'll see you again next time. And I'm gonna have some information in the show notes on how you can find Arlene if you would like to reach out and talk to her. So that those will be there. So take care, everybody. Thank you. Bye. Bye.