Is Self-Awareness a Curse?!

What happens when self-awareness, meant to bring peace, becomes a source of anxiety? In this honest episode, I explore the often-overlooked downside of seeing yourself too clearly—the spirals of overthinking, self-criticism, and social replay loops.

Drawing from my own journey, including 10 years alcohol-free, I share how I manage hyper-awareness using the reset button method from my upcoming book, along with a simple box breathing technique to calm your nervous system.

You'll learn why self-awareness needs self-compassion—and how to turn insight into empowerment, not overwhelm.

Chapters

• 0:59 Welcome to The Cameo Show
• 1:22 Is Self-Awareness a Curse?
• 2:07 The Downside of Hyper-Awareness
• 5:01 Finding Balance with The Reset Button
• 6:44 Box Breathing Technique Explained
• 8:12 Self-Awareness Needs Self-Compassion
• 10:11 Closing Thoughts and Show Information

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:30

Hello and welcome to the Cameo Show. I'm your host, cameo. Today we are going to explore the question is self-awareness a curse? And I know that sounds a little bit dramatic, because isn't self-awareness the goal? Isn't it a gift? Well, it is, but it also feels like a trap sometimes. So let's talk about it First.

Speaker 1: 0:56

What is self-awareness? Self-awareness is the ability to recognize and understand your own thoughts, your own emotions, your own behaviors, your own patterns, and then how they affect you and the people around you. How they affect you and the people around you. It's like holding up a mirror to your inner world and you start to notice not just what you're doing or what everyone else is doing, but kind of why you're doing it or why they might be doing it. Because self-awareness then bleeds into awareness of other people. But we'll stay focused, sorry. So the awareness that you have of yourself the what and then the why allows you to respond and not react, which is the goal. Right, that's empowering, but it also comes with a catch. So I feel like it gets glamorized and we pursue it through journaling and therapy and mindfulness, you name it. I mean, I'm constantly working on self-awareness and if you're exceptionally lucky, you have a lot of self-awareness, because you can certainly see the people who don't right around you, not from a judgment standpoint, but just from a holy cow around you not from a judgment standpoint, but just from a holy cow. It's definitely the starting point for healing and growth and change. It's super powerful.

Speaker 1: 2:22

But, like, once you see yourself and I mean really see yourself you can't unsee it. You become acutely aware of all of the operating systems that you abide by or that you work from, especially fear. You become aware of all of the times you're repeating patterns or people pleasing or avoiding conflict or hard conversations or numbing out. And then you start to notice when you're out of alignment and that feels heavy and icky and you hear yourself saying things like why am I doing this again? How did I find myself here again? I know better. Why can't I stop? I know how to talk myself through this, but it doesn't feel good.

Speaker 1: 3:11

I just had this conversation with someone and it was pertaining to not drinking anymore, because when you're drinking at least for me I kind of just threw all caution to the wind. I would become crazy cameo and I was usually a pretty good time, but of course I took that into dangerous territory of not being such a great time, which is why I don't drink anymore 10 years, 10 years later. But that self-awareness without drinking is like constant it never gets numbed out, it never gets quieted by how I used to with drinking. So then I spiral a little bit into anxiety because I feel like I'm hyper aware and this is where the curse comes. In my words, my reactions, my habits, my thoughts, I can somehow find something wrong with everything that I've done, because I'm like really sensitive about it, even when I haven't maybe done anything wrong. I totally overthink, I'm monitoring every move that I make and then it becomes inner chaos and then I have to go back to all of those things I said at the beginning, like journaling and meditating and quieting my inner voice, and sometimes therapy, to get back. So it's like this vicious cycle. That's why I'm saying is it a curse? But here's the truth. Awareness isn't meant to paralyze you, it's meant to inform you.

Speaker 1: 4:38

And when you're self-aware enough to reflect on those things, like how you're making other people feel or why you're doing things on repeat, for me it's like every time I leave a social interaction I'm like oh my God, did I say the wrong thing? Did I say something hurtful, I didn't mean that I should have put my foot in my mouth. I hope they didn't interpret what I said wrong. I mean, it's like out of control sometimes, and this is where the concept of the reset button comes in. For those of you who don't know, I have a book that will be released in May of 2025, may 20th. It's called the Reset Button.

Speaker 1: 5:13

It's the act of reflecting, and One of those ways is self-awareness and all of these things I've been talking about. It's the reminder that you don't have to have all the answers right now and you don't have to spiral by being self-aware. You can keep it in check, you can pause and you can zoom out and you can say, okay, what needs my attention right now and what can I let go of needs my attention right now and what can I let go of? Because often, specifically for me, when I'm spiraling about my most recent social interaction and how awkward I was, I can usually let go of that, because the truth is that it's great, I'm aware, so that I don't hurt people's feelings or say things that maybe I shouldn't. That's how you learn right, but also it's just not worthy of my worry, because most of the time. One, it's not true, it's my fear kicking in telling me that. And two, everyone's moved on already, like they probably might be thinking the same thing. I am like, oh my God, did I say something weird, or was I awkward, or did I say something hurtful? Because we all tend to think about ourselves, and not necessarily a negative way, but in that type of self-awareness way.

Speaker 1: 6:33

Resetting, as I mentioned in the book, isn't about starting over. It's not a do over. It just means stopping and taking a breath and beginning again and deciding how you want to move forward. I do this technique called box breathing. It helps me tremendously when I feel overwhelmed or when I'm spiraling. It is the method where you breathe in for two to four seconds, you hold at the top for two to four seconds, you breathe out for two to four seconds, you hold at the top for two to four seconds, you breathe out for two to four seconds and you hold at the bottom for two to four seconds.

Speaker 1: 7:08

And you can do that anywhere anytime, over and over and over again, as long as it takes, to help your nervous system calm down, to help your anxiety get quiet, to help you when you're spiraling, because your self-awareness is on overdrive, because what's self-awareness without self-compassion? Right, it's really just self-criticism or self-judgment disguised in something fancy. So you're allowed to be aware and confused, to know better and still be learning how to do better. You're allowed to grow at your own pace. You're allowed to be concerned about how you make other people feel, but you don't have to have anxiety and you don't have to fix everything all at once. You just have to continue to give yourself some self-compassion and remind yourself you'll do better next time. So if you're in that place today where awareness is making your brain loud and your chest tight, I want you to know you're not broken. Let the awareness guide you, but not shame you. Let it soften you, not harden you. And if you need to hit the reset button not to escape but to get through it you can find more information about the reset button on my website, cameoelisebrauncom, where you can sign up for updates about the release or a link to purchase on release day. I appreciate the support so much.

Speaker 1: 8:44

The book breaks down how to reset every aspect of your life, starting with yourself, extending into your relationship with your partner, into how you deal with your shit, how you deal with anxiety coping mechanisms into parenting and your career choices and the maintenance that goes into it afterward, because it's a never ending process and I am hoping that it will meet everyone where they are, with whatever might be challenging in your life the good, the bad, the ugly Some of my stuff's real ugly. I'm not going to lie, but just remember you can find peace and you can have permission. Clarity isn't always comfortable, but it's the first step in choosing to be better.

Speaker 1: 9:40

Thank you so much for listening to the Cameo Show. Be sure to stop where you are like, subscribe, follow whatever platform you're listening or watching on and, if you're so inclined, to leave a review or share this episode with someone who might be struggling with this idea of self-awareness being a curse, like I am self-aware, I've worked so hard to be, but damn it, it's like causing me some trouble. I can't be the only one. I appreciate that you're here. There are new episodes every Wednesday and I hope you'll be back with us again soon. Until next time.