Continuing with the mini series on love, I am sharing with you 1 bible verse that use to trigger me and make me angry to my very core! I talk about why it bothered me, what happened when I didn't abide, and also what I learned from continuing to press into this particular verse that I found offensive to me. This episode is on marriage so I invite those of you who are in serious relationships, newly engaged or married (congratulations!), or if you're like me- been married for years and struggling to find peace and consistent joy in your relationship.
Connect with me as you journey on in your mindset transformation! Now offering life coaching as a service, click the link below to get schedule a call with me.
Continuing with the mini series on love, I am sharing with you 1 bible verse that use to trigger me and make me angry to my very core! I talk about why it bothered me, what happened when I didn't abide, and also what I learned from continuing to press into this particular verse that I found offensive to me. This episode is on marriage so I invite those of you who are in serious relationships, newly engaged or married (congratulations!), or if you're like me- been married for years and struggling to find peace and consistent joy in your relationship.
Connect with me as you journey on in your mindset transformation! Now offering life coaching as a service, click the link below to get schedule a call with me.
I'm excited to connect with you! Remember, you can do hard things! "I can do all things through Him who strengthens me"- Philippians 4:13
*Affiliated with Painting Miracles, INC & Certified Life Coach through the I-A.M System
Hey friend, welcome to the Restored Mind Podcast, where we are going to be talking about various life topics surrounding mindset transformations. These topics are coming from a faith lens and will propel you into a life of peace and joy. My name is Caroline, wife, mom of three, daughter of the one true king. Host of this podcast and certified light coach through the I am system by Painting Vehicles Incorporations. My hope is that this podcast brings God's light into your life and you break free from the chains that are holding you back. Friend, it is time to shift your mindset into one that will help you flourish. Ready? Let's go. Hello and welcome to the restored mind podcast. My name is Caroline. My friend. I'm so happy that you're here today. Welcome to February. Welcome to this podcast. If you are new here, I'm excited that you're here. I don't know. what prompt you did click on this episode, but I'm just thankful that you're here and honestly, I don't think that it was by mistake. I do believe that you were meant to be here. If you are a returning listener. Welcome back. Thank you so much for being a part of this family and for. Spending time with me every week. I love that. I get to talk to you. I know it sounds silly because it's not like I can actually hear you talking back to me, but it truly does feel. Like I'm having a conversation with some girlfriends at a coffee shop, or maybe we're on brunch or something. I don't know. But. Anyway. Welcome. Welcome. Welcome. Happy to have you all here. So last week, we talked about how to love yourself, better focusing on caring for your soul. Right. And so this month's theme is going to be surrounding love. So last week we talked about loving yourself and how there's a difference in caring for your soul versus. Caring for your flesh as an act of self-love. Today, we're going to be talking about the number one Bible verse that used to trigger me. It is definitely going to be. Marriage based so I invite you, if you are a wife, If you are engaged person, newly engaged, congratulations. By the way, if you are in a serious relationship and you are headed towards marriage with the person that you're with. I highly, highly encourage you to just be open to what the message is today. And see what the Lord has for you. I understand that not everyone listening today will agree with me and that's okay. I have contemplated for a very long time on whether or not I wanted to share this. Experience with you have pressing into scripture when it offends me, because I understand that we all go through life differently. And so sometimes scripture speaks to us in a different way that we're not quite ready to receive yet because there's still some hurt in our life that we are working through. So, yes, I understand that we all go through life differently and that can affect our perspective. On the verse that I'm sharing today in particular. But I also believe that. Our father is so good that he speaks to us.. Based off of the things that we go through in life. And so my hope is that you find healing in a way that brings you peace and comfort. As you continue to look to him to provide that for you and whatever journey it is that you're going through any kind of healing journey or situation that you're in I decided to share this episode with you to give you insight. On why I was so bothered by a Bible verse and what I later learned in hopes that it's going to inspire you to press into scripture. Yes. Even the ones that offend you, because that tells me that. And it should hopefully tell you too, that there is. Something there that is needing growth and more knowledge and more understanding. And so I encourage you to press into that. I know it's not always easy. We love to look at scripture when things are very lighthearted and things that we can relate to and come in agreement with. It's the ones that we don't come into agreement with it, we don't quite understand that is harder for us to spend time with, you know, because it's uncomfortable. you're probably wondering what is that Bible verse? Well, my friend, it comes from Ephesians 5 22. And it says wives submit to your own husbands. As to the Lord. Yup. That's it. That's the one that offended me to my very core, because I was not willing to submit. I didn't like that word submit. I did not want to submit to anyone. I saw it as a weakness. And it made me feel like I was not worthy or valuable in the relationship. And, really my marriage and I thought that it wasn't fair. I didn't view myself as a doormat and I certainly did not want to be made to feel like I did not have a voice in my marriage. I battled with it for years because I had a lot of pride in me and I lived with that particular mindset of not wanting to submit, because I saw it as a weakness. I lived it with that mindset that. It. Turned into a very negative way of thinking. And I was not at all close to the Lord at the time when I first came across this verse. I did not know him like I do now. Nor did I understand scripture like I do now. So with all of that. What did that mindset bring into my marriage? My friend. It definitely brought chaos. I complained about everything. Everything that my husband did or everything that wasn't going my way. I complained about it. I definitely was not someone that was easy to get along with. In that season. I also resented serving my husband with a joyful. Heart. Instead, I ended up griping and complaining. But all the things that I had to do. And it didn't make the marriage any better. There's arguments that turned into days of not talking to each other. And eventually we felt like we were walking on eggshells with one another and I'm not trying to scare you into not marrying your person. But there is this trial that we went through and it was a season that we both navigated through because I was dealing with my own things and I'm sure he was dealing with his own things. But the way that I was carrying myself in my marriage was definitely not the way that God would have. Encouraged to me to do it. I was definitely living by my own flesh desires for sure. So thank goodness for the growth that happened, right. Because woof, I don't know how he did it, but he stayed with me. So we're going to take a closer look at this verse in Ephesians five Paul not only talks about what husbands and wives ought to do, but before that, he actually talks about how to walk in love and, and why we do that. We do that by imitating God in Jesus. And that's how we would be able to walk in love. If you think of walking as a behavior, the question then becomes, how are we acting in love towards one another. the word agape comes to mind because it is a form of love. As a matter of fact, It is a Greek word that translates to sacrificial love. One that is not selfish nor conditional. And when I think about someone who has shown me this kind of love in my lifetime. The person that I think of is Jesus. And the reason why is because I am a rebel and I was doomed from the get-go, but Jesus, his sacrifice, his blood washed me clean. And I received the salvation that I have today to be able to sit at the table. That God has provided for me. And I was adopted into his family. And the same is true for you. My friend, you've been redeemed and you've received salvation through the blood of Jesus. As long as you accept him as your Lord and savior. And see. When I think about agape. The kind of sacrificial love that Jesus has. My mind goes to one Corinthians chapter 13, verse four through eight. Where the famous saying the most popular, I would say one of the most popular Bible verse. Anyway. Talks about what love is. It says love is patient. And kind love does not envy or boast is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way. It is not irritable or resentful. It does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears. All things believes, all things, hopes, all things. endures, all things. Love. Never ends. And so with that, When we begin to understand who God is and why Jesus came this verse comes to life because it is consistent. With. Who God is with his character. And the reason why Jesus came as the Messiah. When we imitate God and walk in love. Are we, what love has been described to us according to one Corinthians 13, four through eight, or are we, what love is not? If I'm being completely honest with you. I was mostly what love is not. So that meant that yes. I was envious and boastful. I was rude and arrogant. I insisted for everything to be my way. I was easily irritable and resentful, which I talked about earlier. And so, because I was all of these things, it also meant that I was not very patient. Nor was I kind. I did not rejoice and I did not do a good job at showing hope. And faith nor and I do a good job at enduring all things. I was always on edge. Ready for an argument because of my unwillingness to submit. To my husband and this definitely came from a place of hurt. Along the way in my marriage and things that I just could not forgive. And forgiveness was also something that I had to work on as well. It's definitely not easy navigating life and relationships because it's not only about me now. It's about the other person too. Right? And so yes, it came from a place of hurt. And not truly understanding how me not wanting to submit to my husband was playing out in the season of our marriage. I was mostly fighting with him. And it got exhausting, to be honest with you. I don't believe that I was a terror all the time. We had some good times for sure, but it wasn't consistent. And I believe that is what was missing from our particular love story. The consistent kind of love that has been described to us and one Corinthians. So bringing it back to Ephesians five. Paul writes about submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ. You might be asking what is reverence. My friend that is deep respect. Because I love the Lord. God, I have a deep respect for him. And by me not submitting to my husband. I've realized in my reflection that I've been dishonoring, the gift that God has blessed me with, which is a marriage that has the potential to grow into something beautiful for our kids to witness so that they can have, or want to achieve that kind of love in their life as well. It only comes from him. A kingdom kind of love only comes from our father. I was also dishonoring the gift that God has blessed me with, which is a man who is patient and kind who exhibits all of what love is. Now. That doesn't mean that he's perfect. I don't think anybody is perfect. I know for sure, I'm definitely not perfect. And I'm sure you guys are seeing that now, listening to how I used to think and how that ended up affecting my life. But just because he's not perfect does not mean that he did not deserve the better version of me. He most definitely did deserve a better version of who I was. Paul highlights that we submit to one another out of respect for Christ, but then he writes that wives are to submit to their husband. And one of the biggest questions I had in that season of my life was, well, what about the husbands? See. I was so busy looking at the role of my husband and what he should be doing that I did not focus on what I needed to be doing. And I'll come back around to that in just a second, but I definitely was not in my lane. At the end of chapter five, it reads, however, let each of you love his wife as himself and let the wife see that she respects her husband. My friend. I believe that when we are submitting ourselves to our husband, we are showing respect not only to him, but to Jesus as well. When you submit, you are showing them love. That is in alignment with what love is according to one Corinthians chapter 13, verse four through eight. So I talked about husbands earlier and how I used to wonder, well, what about the husbands? So, yes. What about the husbands? See, I've come to realize that they are to submit to, they are to submit to God. There is a reason why God went to Adam first and shared with him what fruit he could not eat. He was the one that set boundaries with Adam. Adam passed that on over to Eve. Husbands submits to God and loves his wife as Jesus loves the church. So my friend, I have to ask you, what did Jesus do for the church? He sacrificed himself. As a savior for the church. And so we have been asked as wives to submit, but our husband has been asked to sacrifice. That means that maybe it's working harder to walk away from temptation of lust. If that's what they struggle with, or maybe. To spend time with family, they have to sacrifice. The time. That they could put into their work to make more money. Now, these are just examples, but imagine what your husband or your future husbands. Battles are while making sacrifices for your comfort and protection. After lots and lots of reflection and pressing into this particular verse submission for me now, it does not look like weakness. Instead, it looks like respect and love. The word submit itself is one that many people struggle to fully know because our flesh wants to fight against it. It just naturally does it comes with a negative connotation, but I believe that once we step over that and go against what our flesh wants, we grow stronger spiritually. And so will our understanding of love and how to walk in love. Now, I know that both parties have an overlapping role of submission and sacrifices, but the point is that. We walk in love by abiding in the word. And so I hope that you continue to press into the word even. When it is offensive because that is where you're going to grow. My friend, it's so much easier when we look at the gospel. When we look at the Bible, we read things that. We are in agreement with it's so much harder to let the words that we read in scripture, marinate in us, especially when it is offensive to us. But my hope is that as you press into it, That you're going to find truth and light in the midst of all of this and that it's going to change. Your life and renew your mind. I know that it can be hard, but my friend, you can do hard things. Thank you so much for taking the time out of your day to listen in on this episode. I meant what I said. You can do hard things, so don't let the daily challenges stop you from reaching your greatest potential. If you are ready to take the next step in your journey and are finding that you are in need of help and would like someone to keep you accountable, I would love to offer you my life coaching services. Click on the link in the show notes to get started there. You will also find links to my social media pages where you're able to connect with me as well. My friends, I look forward to speaking with you again next week here on the restored mind podcast. Go in peace.