151 | Mom Guilt When Your Emotions Feel Bigger Than Your Faith

Hey Mama!

Do you ever feel like your emotions are bigger than your faith—like you know God is there, but you're still carrying the weight alone?⁠⁠

Maybe you replay the moments you lost your temper, tell yourself you should know better by now, or feel guilty for even needing help in the first place.⁠⁠⁠⁠ You're not alone, mama.

In this episode, you'll discover:

• Why trying to get it all together before bringing your struggles to God keeps you stuck in the guilt cycle⁠⁠
• Simple, practical ways to reset in the middle of overwhelming moments—even when you don't have time for a perfect quiet time⁠⁠

God isn't waiting for you to have it all together. He's already close to you right now, in the heavy moment.⁠⁠ This episode offers biblical encouragement and gentle grace for the Christian mom navigating motherhood with faith and peace.⁠⁠

Press play and breathe a little easier today.

More FREE Resources:

Take The Quiz: Discover Your Mom Guilt Type

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FREE Community:  Break Free From Mom Guilt

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Email: carolinethao@restoredmindllc.com

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It's time to become to the mom you want to be. Remember, you can do hard things!
"I can do all things through Him who strengthens me"- Philippians 4:13

Transcript

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When the guilt feels bigger than your faith and your drowning in the not enough spiral, you don't need to fix it before you bring it to God. In fact, trying to fix it first might be what's keeping you stuck. There's a better way forward. Let's get into it, mama. If you're sitting in the guilt right now replaying what you said, what you didn't do, feeling crushed by it all, you are not alone. The Discover Your Mom Guilt quiz is going to help you. Now I know what you might be thinking. I already feel guilty enough. Won't this just make me feel worse? But here's the truth. Naming your guilt is the first step to releasing it. When you understand your specific guilt pattern, it loses power over you. The quiz doesn't add guilt. It helps you subtract it. It's only seven questions, and takes just about three minutes to complete the link to your Freedom Mama. Is in the show notes. Welcome back Mamas. I'm so excited to be here because I wanna jump right into today's conversation because I had such a rough week at the time of this recording and it got me thinking. So here's what happened. I ended up hyper extending my knee at the playground when I was playing tag with my husband and my kids. I know it's embarrassing. Well, at least it was embarrassing for me. I've talked about this with some of my mom friends, and they have told me it's nothing to be embarrassed about. It happens and they'll say something like, Hey, at least you were playing with your kids and you were spending time with them when this happened. Right? And you know what? I know that they were coming from a great place, and I appreciate that, and they're absolutely right that this incident took place as I was bonding with my family, playing a game of tag, but I still felt embarrassed by it. as a kid, falling and crying is totally acceptable. But as an adult, not so much. I didn't cry, but just the whole tripping part of it was really embarrassing'cause it was in front of a lot of people. Anyway, after we got home and I iced my knee, I ended up getting it checked out that same night because the pain was just unbearable. And thankfully, my husband took the week off of work to help me with school drop offs and basically everything that I would normally handle at home by myself. I remember there was a day that week that I got incredibly irritated about something, and as I was venting to him and just talking aggressively, as I was frustrated and annoyed, he walks over incredibly calm, by the way, and kisses me. And tells me not to worry about it and that he'll take care of it. And he did. As a matter of fact, he took care of most things that week. And you know, it made me realize something. I was so used to doing everything by myself that I actually struggled to ask for help when I needed it most. I honestly felt useless'cause I was limping around and it hurt to move on my left leg. And if you know me, you know that I'm a pretty active person. So sitting still while my knee was healing up felt like time was absolutely crawling by. But here's what hit me. In the middle of all of that frustration, I wasn't just struggling to accept my husband's help. I was struggling to accept that I couldn't fix everything on my own.. And mama, if we're honest, how many of us do that with God too? We know that he's there. We know that he cares, but. I think I just rhymed. That was unintentional anyway, but we still try to muscle through and manage it ourselves and then we feel guilty for needing help in the first place. Or we tell ourselves, you know what? I shouldn't bring this to God because I know that he's helping people with bigger problems. But what if the point wasn't to have it all together? And what if the point was to stop trying to carry what we were never meant to carry alone? Because God designed you to depend on him not to carry the weight of your emotions or your past mistakes, or your not enough thoughts alone. And so when you try to manage overwhelming feelings by yourself, by stuffing them down and replaying them in your head, or pushing through, until you can present a quote unquote better version of yourself to God, what ends up happening is you end up operating outside of how he has designed the relationship between you and him to work. And God is a wonderful homemaker because in Genesis we see that he's created the land and sky and water and vegetation and all of the animals first before he created. Man, that wasn't by mistake, mama. He prepared everything that you would need before you even took your first breath. And the thing is, He didn't create you and then scrambled to figure out how to take care of you. He made a place for you. He provided for you, before you knew you needed. And mama, he's still doing that even now. He knew that you would have days where guilt feels crushing. He knew that you would probably replay the moments where you messed up over and over again, and he knew that you would feel that some days you're just not enough or not doing enough, and he already made a way for you to bring all of that to him. So you don't have to get it together first. He's already prepared a place for your burdens with him and because trying to carry everything alone keeps you stuck in the cycle. The perfectionist mom might be thinking, once I get it together, then I'll pray about it. Or if you're a comparison mom, then you might be thinking. You know what? Other people have more problems, bigger problems than I do, and mine are just simply not worth his time. At least not yet. I'll wait till everything calms down in the past, dweller mom thinks, well, you know, I've already messed up too much in the past. I've already asked for forgiveness, and I keep doing the same things over and over again, so I don't think that I should go to him. And by the way, as I'm talking about the perfectionist, the comparison and the past dweller, mom, if you want to know what kind of mom guilt type you are, take my quiz that I've developed for you. It's linked in the show notes, but here's the truth. Psalms 34 18 says, the Lord is close to the broken hearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. That means God is not standing around waiting for you to get it together. When you're worn down and your heart feels heavy, he comes close. And the word saves doesn't always mean everything changes overnight. Sometimes it looks like God is steadying you and helping you breathe again and giving you the strength to take that next step to become the mom that you want to be. If you feel crushed in spirit, this verse is not. To shame you. It is reminding you that you are not alone. So maybe you're thinking, okay, Caroline, but I have been praying and it feels like nothing is happening. And you know what? I get that because prayer is not something that is tangible that we can hold in our hands, right This instant. Psalms 34 verse 17 says, the Lord hears when his people cry out and he delivers. And sometimes that deliverance is not an instant escape where we receive. Relief right away. Sometimes it's God sustaining you in the middle of it and guiding you forward one step at a time. In the waiting, it can be helpful to pause and pray. Say something like, Lord, what am I really reaching out for right now? Is it relief? Is it control? Is it approval? Is it safety? And that's not to beat yourself up. It's just a simple practice to invite God to heal what's underneath, and also for you to really think about what it is you're asking of him. And that's not a bad thing either. God is not waiting for perfect prayers, by the way, but he does invite honest prayers that let him shape what we want, So here's two thoughts that you can have, and I invite you to think about this and tell yourself, I can keep using prayer like a last resort, or I can let prayer be a relationship. And the thing is, you get to choose how you're going to use prayer, but my suggestion is to use it so that you can build a relationship with God. So what does that actually look like in real life? Like when you're in the middle of a spiral and you don't have time for a perfect quiet time moment with God? Let's get really practical. So here's some simple steps that you can take when your emotions feel bigger than your faith. If you're in it right now, your next step might be as simple as texting one mama that you trust and saying, Hey, can you pray for me? I'm really struggling today. This is where community with other mamas are incredibly helpful for lots of reasons, but I'll go ahead and share two with you right now. The first one is that spiraling. When you spiral outta control in your thoughts, it grows into isolation. When you're alone in your thoughts, the enemy loves to whisper, shame and keep replaying what you did wrong so that you can continue to stay stuck in that. And then secondly, God often strengthens us through people. It's not meant for us to replace him. With our circle of trusted mamas, but he provides for us support in the messy middle because motherhood can give you tunnel vision, and even one or two trusted Mama can help you see clearly again, even when everything feels like a blur. Another simple, practical thing that you can do right now in the middle of that moment is to take a deep breath. And let your exhale be slow and controlled. Now, I know that might sound almost too simple, like it was a cop out, practical thing to do from me, But mama, when you don't have the time for a full quiet moment with God, this can be your next best reset. I have done this multiple times and every time I do this. It helps out. I calm down. My thoughts are a little bit clearer, and honestly, it might take one or two deep breaths in order for me to really regain my composure. But as you breathe out, set your mind on him and whisper something short like, Lord, help me, or, Lord I need you. That one tiny little sentence, can create a tiny pocket of stillness in the chaos. And when I say stillness, I don't mean you get like 30 minutes. You might just have two seconds to do that. And this actually lines up with what Paul talks about in Philippians, we love Philippians four 13 here at the podcast that says, I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. But in the verse around it, Paul explains that he had to learn contentment in every season, even the uncomfortable ones. And I think we can take that as inspiration and encouragement for us moms who are struggling through mom guilt. We can still be content that this is the lesson that we learned today, or that we are reminded of God's grace and mercy this day, and so we are able to extend the forgiveness to ourself. So sometimes strength doesn't look like you're powering through the day and muscling through motherhood by yourself. No. Sometimes it looks like pausing, taking this breath and letting God meet you right where you are. So, mama, I know how exhausting it is to feel like you have to keep it all together before you can finally bring it to God. Like your mess is too messy, or your struggle isn't quote unquote big enough for it to matter. But here's the shift. God is not waiting at the finish line. He is already close to you right now in this heavy moment in the guilt. You do not need permission to need him. You are not alone in this. You're becoming the mom. You want to be one honest moment with God at a time. and I know that it can be incredibly uncomfortable and hard, but you can do hard things. Thanks for hanging out with me today, mama. If this episode helped you in any way, would you do me a favor and please share it with a fellow mom that could also benefit from this episode. Until then, I'll see you next Wednesday, right here on this podcast. Go in peace.