154 | Christian Motherhood: Stop Letting Your Thoughts Ruin Today—Rest Here

Hey mama!

Do you feel like one small moment with your kids can “ruin” your whole day—because your mind won’t stop replaying it? That’s where mom guilt quietly takes over in Christian motherhood: you start spiraling in “I should’ve known better,” “I’m behind,” and “why can’t I get it together like other moms?”

In this episode, you’ll get biblical encouragement and practical steps to stop letting your thoughts narrate your motherhood—so you can experience more peace, grace, and steadiness right in the middle of real life.

Here’s what you’ll walk away with:

• A 30-second “thought audit” to catch condemnation and replace it with truth
• A faith-based reset to renew your mind (Romans 12:2) and take your thoughts captive (2 Corinthians 10:5)

If you’re ready to break the mom guilt cycle and rest in God’s presence again, press play—and take my free quiz, Discover Your Mom Guilt Type. The link is in the show notes

Referenced Episode:

152 | Mom Guilt And The Pressure To 'Stay On Track'

More FREE Resources:

Take The Quiz: Discover Your Mom Guilt Type

Become a Restored Mind Mama: Sign Up Here

FREE Community:  Break Free From Mom Guilt

Instagram: @_restoredmind

Email: carolinethao@restoredmindllc.com

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It's time to become to the mom you want to be. Remember, you can do hard things!
"I can do all things through Him who strengthens me"- Philippians 4:13

Transcript

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You know that moment when your kid says mommy, and then you instantly feel irritated, and then maybe two hours later you find yourself stuck in guilt because you've replayed that moment and you're thinking, how, how could I have been so irritated in that moment? I feel so bad that replay loop is exhausting. Mama. In this episode, I'm gonna show you how to stop letting mom guilt narrate your day, and start building a biblical mindset that brings peace. Welcome to the Restored Mind. Biblical wisdom, simple steps. No more mom guilt. I'm Caroline Tao. Let's do this. before we jump in, I want to invite you to take my free quiz. It's discover your mom guilt type because once you can name how guilt shows up for you, you can finally stop fighting the wrong battle. It takes just a couple of minutes and you'll walk away with language for what's been weighing on you and your next best step to break the cycle. The link is in the show notes. All right. Welcome back Mama's. Happy Wednesday. I'm so happy to greet you here on this podcast today. We're just gonna dive right in because today's conversation is such a good one, and I think it's one that we can all relate to. when, my youngest was very little. She was incredibly clingy to me, but she would be okay if she could see me. So that meant if I was in a periphery vision, then she was fine. As she got older and more independent, I would communicate with her and just say, Hey, mommy's gonna go into the garage to work out. If you need me, I'll be in there. And of course I would leave the door open after I explained it. I thought she understood what I was saying because she indicated that she was okay with that by nodding her head and saying, okay. So I thought we had a mutual understanding. But then she would look up and not see me and then end up crying. And this type of cry was not a soft whimpering type of cry. It was one that was incredibly loud, It was actually kind of scary. But over time I just got incredibly frustrated with this because I wanted to work out while she was playing and I ended up creating a more stressful environment than it really needed to be because I would say things like, why are you crying? I told you I was gonna be out into the garage, by the way. I said it was so much more attitude. I was incredibly angry at this time. And the volume of my voice was actually 10 times louder than this. What I didn't realize then was that she didn't care what I was saying. I actually made things worse because she was upset and nothing mattered at that point because she looked up and her mom was not there, and this is where the mommy misery mindset can sneak in. It's this idea or this thinking that I can't do anything by myself because I don't have time. My kids are so clingy to me, they take up every minute of my day. And you know what? That could be true, but there's also a different way to think about it. And so what changed for me was this, Instead of trying to fight the idea that she should understand, I began to invite her into my space. I gave her her own little play area, and when the weather was really good, I would open the garage door and let her play outside. And the thing is, she never really even talked to me. She was just in her own world. She just wanted to be around me. And eventually we got into a rhythm. So whenever mommy put on her shoes, she knew it was about time to go out into the garage. So she would grab her shoes too. And it made me realize that sometimes our kids are not asking for entertainment. They're really asking for our presence. And this is where I want you to notice something. The difference between those two season wasn't just my daughter's behavior, it was the story that I was telling myself about what her need meant. So one mindset says, my kids are taking away from me. The other mindset says my kids. Are built for connection and I can create rhythms that aren't that without resenting them, Which by the way, episode 152. Is the perfect one for you to listen to if what I said just resonated. Because this episode shows you how to release the pressure of control in your day to day and to practice a simple grace-filled reset that anchors you back to God in the interruption. All right, so go check that one out. So now let's talk about how to build a biblical mindset that renews your mind in the middle of real life motherhood, because the misery mommy mindset is when motherhood starts to feel like something that you endure instead of something that you live out and truly through and through. Enjoy all of it, even those hard days where you've messed up, and it might sound something like this. I am behind because I can't do anything. My kids always interrupt me or maybe it's, I can't ever get a moment to myself, and then you automatically feel annoyed. You are irritated, you're frustrated. It's a really dark mindset to be in because guilt. Takes one hard moment and turns it into an identity. A mom once told me, these are your kids and this is their childhood, but this is also your motherhood, and that is so insightful and inspiring to hear because being in the mommy misery mindset. You don't fully get to enjoy your motherhood. If you're always living in what already happened, then you start missing what's right in front of you. And there's a spiritual piece that I wanna share with you, and it's that the enemy doesn't need to steal your kids. Not that he can't or that he won't, but when he steals your focus. Then you've become distracted. And so all I'm trying to say is do not make it easier for the enemy to take your child because you've become distracted. So how can you build a biblical mindset that is going to help you move forward? There's three things that they're inspired by scripture that I wanna share with you. the first one is to renew your mind. It comes from Romans 12, two that says, do not be conformed to the world. But be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect. And mama, I just want to remind you that God cares about your thought patterns because they shape. Your patterns of living, living in the mommy misery mindset. Growing resentment for my kids made me try really hard to escape them, to escape motherhood, which felt like it was impossible because I was always going to be their mom no matter what. And when you renew your mind by looking to God first And discerning the will of God and what is good and acceptable and perfect. It is not the misery mommy mindset. We're not looking to get away from our daily duties as moms because those don't end, but we are wanting some joy and peace in that. Imagine the constant access that you would get to that if you partnered with God and renewed your mind daily. The second one is to take your thought captive, which comes from two Corinthians chapter 10, verse five. It says, we destroy arguments in every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ. And Mama, I have to say, not every thought deserves a seat at your table. They might try to sit there, but you can very much so say, no, not today. All right. Because it is so important that we don't continue to feed into the lies of our thoughts, especially when they are telling us that we are bad moms. Because these thoughts that we have, that stems from this misery mommy mindset, that's the one that keeps you stuck in the mom guilt cycle. I felt like I was undeserving of my kids because of my attitude and what I thought about them. It was such a feeding ground for the enemy to take hold of because I was not taking my thought captive. I took my thoughts and I dwelled on them without having raised it up against the knowledge of God. Meaning what do I know that God says about me? What do I trust and believe about what God says that he can do? And so when you start shifting that, it starts making a huge difference in how you end up talking about yourself to yourself. And the third one is to use the fruit of the spirit as your motherhood filter, so to speak. That verse comes from Galatians chapter five, verse 22 and 23, it says, but the fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, Self-control. And when you think about how you want to be, if you had the perfect motherhood journey, these are all the things that we would say that we would want our kids to remember about us and what we want to emulate to our kids. And so it's so important that we use this to filter the way that we move in our motherhood, and there's three of'em that I can talk about right now off the top of my head. When it comes to love, I want you to ask, am I loving with God's love or with my flesh? Love because when we pick and choose what we love, it's very limited. But God's love is steadfast. It's as deep as it is wide, and we probably can't even comprehend the, the depth of his love. Patience is another one that comes to mind because I used to say I was not a patient person. I was not a patient mom. I was easily irritated by my kids and I knew I didn't like it, but I used to tell myself like, that's just who I am. But the truth is I just wasn't willing to put in the work to change. And to. Become better with self-control, which is the third one that I wanted to talk about because I use to lose control all the time, especially with my emotions. I was leading with my mouth I want you to ask. Is my emotion leading my mouth or is the Holy Spirit leading me because I used to lack self-control like nobody's business But a simple practice that you can do is a 30 second thought audit. When you feel triggered, I want you to ask, what am I telling myself right now? And is this conviction, which leads to change or condemnation, which leads to shame? Or you continue to stay stuck in that mom guilt cycle and I want you to. Think about what is one true replacement thought that you can partner with? So an example that I can give you is this, the mommy misery thought is, I can't do anything by myself because my kids take up every single moment of my time. But the truth thoughts that you can replace is I can build a rhythm that honors my kids' needs without resenting them. And then not only are you replacing these thoughts, but now you're gonna take action on those things. Okay? And mama, if you've been stuck in that misery mommy mindset, I just wanna say you are not alone, but nothing changes when guilt becomes the narrator of your motherhood. What changes is when you start noticing the thought and taking it captive and replacing it with truth, and then doing something about it. You are still in it in this motherhood journey. No matter how old your kids are, grace is still going to be available to you no matter how long you've been on this motherhood journey. And I know that you are working incredibly hard to become the mom that you want to be. And the thing is, you can build a motherhood that feels immensely lighter, not because. Your kids changed overnight or because you changed overnight, but because your mind is being renewed daily and I know that it can be hard, but you can do hard things. Thanks for hanging out with me today, mama. If this episode helped you in any way, would you do me a favor and please share it with a fellow mom that could also benefit from this episode. Until then, I'll see you next Wednesday, right here on this podcast. Go in peace.