Highly Sensitive People and Pain/Symptoms

The moment someone tells you "you're just too sensitive," a little piece of you might shrink inside. That dismissal of your experience happens far too often for the 15-20% of us who identify as highly sensitive people. But what if your sensitivity isn't a weakness to overcome but an important aspect of who you are—one that deserves understanding, especially when chronic pain enters the picture?

Sensitivity creates a unique relationship with pain. Your heightened awareness of both internal and external stimuli means your nervous system processes the world differently. Like a smoke alarm with the sensitivity dialed up, your brain might trigger pain signals more readily than others. This doesn't make your pain any less real; it simply means your path to healing might look different too.

Throughout this episode, we share personal stories about navigating life as sensitive people (our whole household qualifies—except perhaps our fearless cat, Hermione!). Tanner opens up about his experiences from childhood through adulthood, from feeling overwhelmed in locker room roughhousing to managing financial stress differently. These aren't stories of weakness but illustrations of how differently our nervous systems can be wired.

The good news? Understanding this connection unlocks powerful healing possibilities. Rather than fighting against your sensitivity, we explore how embracing it while developing regulation skills creates lasting relief. Through embodiment practices, safety signals (like breathwork and movement), and gradual exposure to overwhelming stimuli, you can teach your brain new patterns while honoring your sensitive nature.

Your sensitivity likely gives you gifts others don't share: deeper empathy, creativity, meaningful connections, and an appreciation for beauty's subtleties. As you listen to this episode, we hope you'll begin to see your sensitivity not as something to overcome, but as an essential part of you that—when properly understood—might be your greatest strength in overcoming chronic pain and creating the life you truly desire.

Tanner Murtagh and Anne Hampson are therapists who treat neuroplastic pain and mind-body symptoms. They are also married!

In his 20s, Tanner overcame chronic pain and a fibromyalgia diagnosis by learning his symptoms were neuroplastic, not structural. Post-healing, Tanner and Anne have dedicated their lives to developing effective treatment and education for neuroplastic pain and symptoms.

Listen and learn how to assess your own chronic pain and symptoms, gain tools to retrain the brain and nervous system, and make changes in your life and health!

The Mind-Body Couple podcast is owned by Pain Psychotherapy Canada Inc. This podcast is produced by Alex Klassen, one of the wonderful therapists at our agency in Calgary, Alberta. https://www.painpsychotherapy.ca/

Tanner, Anne, and Alex also run the MBody Community, an in-depth online course that provides a step-by-step process for assessing, treating, and resolving mind-body pain and symptoms. https://www.mbodycommunity.com

Check out Tanner's YouTube channel for more free education and practices: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC-Fl6WaFHnh4ponuexaMbFQ

And follow us for daily education posts on Instagram: @painpsychotherapy

Disclaimer: The information provided on this podcast is for gen...

Transcript

Welcome to MindBodyCouple Podcast

Speaker 1 0:00

Welcome to the MindBodyCouple podcast.

Speaker 2 0:03

I'm Tanner Murtaugh and I'm Anne Hampson. This podcast is dedicated to helping you unlearn chronic pain and symptoms. If you need support with your healing, you can book in for a consultation with one of our therapists at painpsychotherapyca or purchase our online course at embodycommunitycom to access in-depth education, somatic practices, recovery tools and an interactive community focused on healing. Links in the description of each episode. Hi everyone.

Speaker 1 0:52

Hi everybody, Welcome to our podcast Welcome welcome. Welcome.

Understanding Highly Sensitive People

Speaker 2 0:58

Today. That was a lot of welcomes. Today we're talking about a popular topic, Anne. Yeah, you hear about this a lot. I relate to this topic a lot, which we'll dive into. We're going to discuss highly sensitive people and chronic pain and symptoms.

Speaker 1 1:18

Yeah, for sure, and we think this is a really needed topic because I don't know about you, tanner, but a lot of people that I'm working with recognize that they would kind of identify with being a highly sensitive person.

Speaker 2 1:32

It's really common. You know our household. We got some highly sensitive people.

Speaker 1 1:38

We do If we had to think about where we have highly sensitive people in our lives. It would just it would be us and our children and our animals.

Speaker 2 1:46

Let's rank us right now. This will be fun.

Speaker 1 1:48

Okay In terms of sensitivity.

Speaker 2 1:51

Highest at the top.

Speaker 1 1:53

You?

Speaker 2 1:53

Yeah, I'm definitely, I'm talking and we'll talk through this podcast in a wise manner Would be the most sensitive, I think a close second to me is our son.

Speaker 1 2:02

Yes, yes.

Speaker 2 2:09

Well, what about our daughter? Nah, he's, he's there.

Speaker 1 2:10

Okay, I love him for it, but he's there, he's with me. Yeah, they're both very sensitive.

Speaker 2 2:14

More than me, I think you might be before our daughter, um no, and it's not ready to admit her sense of this.

Speaker 1 2:22

I'm not, though. It'd be Tanner, our son, our daughter, me, yeah, me and our cat, harry, would be tied, yeah we're throwing in the animals.

Speaker 2 2:33

Oh yeah, our dog is super sensitive too, but our one cat, Hermione.

Speaker 1 2:37

I don't know if you guys have heard us talk about her. Actually, we haven't talked about our animals in a long time on our podcast.

Speaker 2 2:43

I know.

Speaker 1 2:44

We feel like I realize you guys need updates. Anyways, we'll do that, maybe next episode.

Speaker 2 2:49

There's something, there's a piece missing in Hermione, our cat's brain.

Speaker 1 2:53

She should be more sensitive than she is she. We wish her to join us in sensitivity world, she rules the house. Yeah, she is a bit fierce and a bit scary.

Speaker 2 3:08

Yeah, she is a bit scary.

Speaker 1 3:10

She's the littlest cat and very sweet.

Speaker 2 3:12

But if she was bigger, she would eat us.

Speaker 1 3:14

Totally, she's out for herself, and we've seen that in so many instances.

Speaker 2 3:19

Yeah, we've seen.

Speaker 1 3:19

Yeah, maybe we'll show that let's get into the topic. Maybe we'll share that more later. Yeah, highly, we'll show that let's get into the topic.

Speaker 2 3:24

Maybe we'll share that more later Highly sensitive house. Yes, I know we're joking around about this, but I know this can be difficult for a lot of people. I do want to state that. But I think part of where we're going to end up here is also really honoring and feeling empowered by sensitivity, like I think that's what it is as well, because being sensitive, like like people are told this in somewhat quite emotionally abusive ways where it's, it's seen as like this, such, this negative trait oh yeah, how many like.

Speaker 1 3:56

And how often did you hear oh, you're just being too sensitive oh, it's constant don't be so sensitive, and I think sometimes in our culture and society there's this thing about okay, we can't show our sensitivity or we have to toughen up, and that can be so many more podcasts where we talk about that.

Speaker 2 4:14

But you're right, I think there can be this negative view of it there can be, and I think we've come a long way just in really being more open and accepting in our society. I think we have a long ways to go in regards to this and we want to talk about this. We want to talk about highly sensitive people and really what this can look like for individuals.

The Link Between Sensitivity and Pain

Speaker 1 4:39

So the term highly sensitive person was coined by a psychologist named Elaine Aaron, and she predicted 15 to 20% of the population are high in the trait called sensory processing sensitivity. I know that was a big word.

Speaker 2 4:56

It's a big word, a big phrase there, yeah, but I want to pause there because it's a high percentage.

Speaker 1 5:03

Yeah, 15 to 20% of the population, for sure.

Speaker 2 5:07

Yeah, like one in five.

Speaker 1 5:08

Yeah.

Speaker 2 5:09

And so that's another thing to consider here, because I think, when people feel that they're highly sensitive, they view that this is not common and that they're really, you know, very different than the majority of people, but it's such a high trait that occurs for a lot of people.

Speaker 1 5:28

Why do you think that happens, tanner? Like, why do you sometimes we can feel in isolation with it?

Speaker 2 5:35

Well, I think it's been viewed as such a negative thing. People are told this by their parents, their caregivers, their teachers, their friends, and I think a lot of people feel in isolation from it because they hide it.

Speaker 1 5:48

Yeah.

Speaker 2 5:48

It's something that I hid as much as I could growing up, and I think I'm not alone in that. Like that's a really common thing to take place, yeah, and we think about this like there's this heightened sensitivity to both internal heightens sensitivity to both internal and external stimuli.

Speaker 1 6:06

So I want to emphasize that, like internal things that are taking place, like sensation-wise, but also these external things like sounds, light, smells, textures, social interactions, and this sensitivity is shown typically in emotional reactions, so, for instance, anxiety, fear, anger or frustration, maybe shutdown and avoidance.

Speaker 2 6:30

Yeah, and it's really more affected, I think, people it's an easy thing to watch out for, because I think a lot of people that are highly sensitive myself included is we're affected very greatly by confrontation, by disagreements, like we really deeply feel that yeah so the reason we're talking about this on the podcast is there is a direct link between neuroplastic pain and symptoms and highly sensitive people. I don't think many people are going to argue that link yeah, but we but we will explain that.

Speaker 2 7:04

When you understand neuroplastic pain and symptoms, what's taking place is the body's healthy, there's no damage, there's no disease, safe signals are going up to the brain, but the brain's overreacting. It's overreacting and it starts to amplify sensations, and the reason this takes place is this sense of danger. Even if we're actually safe, there's this heightened sense of danger that the brain and nervous system is feeling that's going to produce chronic pain and chronic symptoms, and so really, in our opinion, it makes perfect sense when we talk about this. Being highly sensitive, someone who's highly sensitive, you have to understand this. Like your brain and nervous system, it's more reactive to inputs which would make you more likely to develop neuroplastic pain and symptoms.

Tanner's Experience with High Sensitivity

Speaker 1 7:53

Almost like a little bit more like softer armor, like when we think of Hermione, for instance. There's nothing that's going to penetrate that cat, yeah, but when we're a bit more highly sensitive, there's a lot more that is maybe impacting us and, as we're going to talk about, when you're highly sensitive, sensations are more intense, including your likeliness of developing chronic pain, chronic symptoms.

Speaker 2 8:19

Our producer, alex, he often talks about it as like the smoke alarm.

Speaker 1 8:23

Yeah.

Speaker 2 8:24

The smoke alarm's highly sensitive.

Speaker 1 8:27

Ah, so it picks up a bit more.

Speaker 2 8:28

Yeah, you're cooking and like you barely burned anything, it's just going off. Yeah, and that's what happens with neuroplastic pain and symptoms Like it's. Our pain and symptom alarm system gets really hypersensitive. This is why some people when, like they lightly touch their leg, they'll experience pain.

Speaker 1 8:50

I imagine listening to this it might feel frustrating for some people, tanner, because for people that identify or relate to being a highly sensitive person, well, it can be like well, how do I change that?

Speaker 2 9:01

Yeah, right, and I think we're going to talk about the solution at the end for sure, but the solution I'm going to say this time and time again today is not to kill off the highly sensitive part of you. Ah Now, yes, we want more nervous system regulation on board, but this self-acceptance and learning to work with your unique nervous system that is sensitive.

Speaker 1 9:27

By doing that, we can reduce or eliminate neuroplastic pain and symptoms I love that tenor because I think kind of back to what we were saying at the beginning. If we, it's often so, viewed negatively, feeling highly sensitive and so that idea to kind of suppress it, ignore it, kind of pretend that we're not that way, that often means we're not honoring our true selves and we know that it's really important in healing from chronic pain and symptoms.

Speaker 2 9:55

Yeah, and so for myself.

Speaker 1 9:57

when we talk about me, you're already laughing, maybe because Tanner's like you know for myself, when we talk about me, like you're just waiting for Tanner's, like you know for myself when we talk about me, like you're just waiting for to talk about you yeah, well, and and and excited to talk about me in this context.

Speaker 2 10:14

I know, I know you're. You don't even lie here, you're this next section and got some things loaded up.

Speaker 1 10:21

She's ready to go yeah, I do well, because we want to talk about how your experience of being a highly sensitive person.

Speaker 2 10:28

Yeah, and I am highly sensitive. I've come to great acceptance. I feel quite empowered with it now, but when I was younger I really knew that I felt very differently inside than a lot of people around me. What told you that? Like other boys my age, like when arguments would break out in class or Like I remember I was in the locker room once with a bunch of the guys after gym class I think maybe I was grade seven, something like that and they're wrestling, you know, people were and jokingly like pushing each other around, and I remember feeling like really on alert, like really quite scared, and I could see everyone else's faces like really enjoying themselves and and there was like a threat feeling of like whoa, what's going to happen, like this is getting a little rambunctious, and that's like one example. But I noticed, like all these little confrontations or arguments or things that people would say to me, even if they were wrong, I felt it in a much deeper way.

Speaker 1 11:35

Were you nervous, were you anxious, or how does this come out for sensitivity for you?

Speaker 2 11:39

Yeah, I think for myself there's nervousness, anxiousness. I think as I got older it came out more as like anger, frustration, not always in a great place in our home, but like I think that's how it came out as I got older. But there was this like sensitivity that was pretty perpetual. And yeah, I found it's interesting because I don't view myself as like a socially anxious person. I'm introverted, but I'm not socially anxious. Usually, like I feel quite, but there was this overwhelm of stimuli. Like when we go to concerts, for example, I get overwhelmed, like I can feel it, like I'm around, even if it's like a concept I'm excited about.

Speaker 1 12:23

It's just a lot of stimuli for my nervous system to handle well, and I think I that's a great way to describe it of being overwhelmed, and I know a lot of people that talk to me about this relate to just feeling a lot feeling a lot from their environment, feeling a lot from the people around them, feeling a lot, feeling a lot from their environment, feeling a lot from the people around them, feeling a lot of the emotions going on maybe in the room, and so maybe that deep feeling or that deep connection that can feel dysregulating sometimes.

Speaker 2 12:48

Yeah, I think it can feel like a lot. Yeah, you're right there, because, yeah, it's the busy environment. It's like my emotions, my interactions, and what I learned when I came to this like mind body approach is I had a real hard time dropping into my body. Why was that so hard?

Speaker 2 13:03

because everything felt so overwhelming yeah, okay, so it was a lot yeah and how I handled my high sensitivity, as you know, and and I've gotten better with this way, better over the years was just through avoidance, which I think a lot of people do. Things feel really overwhelming internally or externally, so it makes sense that avoidance is the solution that we fall on.

Why Sensitive People Develop Chronic Pain

Speaker 1 13:28

Totally and so and we want to validate that of like, okay, we want we start avoiding because that's what we feel helps. And it can be really overwhelming when we realize, oh, I can't avoid, I shouldn't avoid anymore, or I need to actually move towards, because I think that's true, we can hold on to avoidance for dear life and that becomes so habitual of, okay, I need to avoid this or do this or be a certain way to be safe, and so it can be really hard to change that pattern. But yeah, I have witnessed Tanner's sensitivity for our whole lives and I like that we talk about it in this way, because I think sometimes, tanner and our relationship I didn't realize that was about sensitivity for you. I would maybe see different reactions or different emotions. Maybe I would see your avoidance or your anger.

Speaker 1 14:23

Um, and now understanding okay, that makes sense about being highly sensitive. I think at the time I didn't always realize that and it was confusing, as maybe a partner and I also am a highly sensitive person. Like we said, our house besides our money our whole household is um.

Speaker 1 14:41

But I think that's a really good thing to note that highly sensitive people. We can show it in different ways.

Speaker 2 14:49

I agree with you that this comes out differently for every single person, like it's not, like it's just the exact same all the time, like people. People respond to this stuff differently over time and just because you're angry and aggressive and that's how you're coming out in your interactions, you could be highly, just as highly sensitive or more highly sensitive than someone who's nervous and anxious all the time. I guess it's a different way that we're trying to cope as we go along. I even think about an example right now. Right now we have some finance issues nothing like major, but we have like big finance purchases that are coming up, like we have to move offices at the clinic.

Speaker 1 15:33

I gave Tanner a look there because I was like what are you sharing here, tanner?

Speaker 2 15:37

Everything's okay, people. But there is these things that I think for yourself you're like, oh, this is kind of an annoying deal, we've got to look at a bunch of places. But for me it really builds up in my system. I can feel there's that sensitivity to change, and finances always do it to me. There's this sensitivity of like, oh, we're losing money, what's taking place, even though it's like nowhere close to concerning, but to me it really feels like that internally, like that's the sensation experience and I think for you, tanner, you've talked about this a lot on our podcast before is change, change, transitions, travel, travel, maybe travel to a new office.

Speaker 1 16:20

Things becoming different for you feels overwhelming. You feel it maybe a bit more than somebody else that might be a bit less sensitive to this type of thing.

Speaker 2 16:30

Yes, yeah now we want to transition to talking about a little bit more in detail highly sensitive people and chronic pain and symptoms, and we've broken this down a bit, but there's a few things to consider here of why these things are so linked. So when we understand chronic pain, chronic symptoms, think about it like this due to sensitivity within stimuli, relationships, environments that a person with this like highly sensitive nervous system feels they're going to more easily fall into, these states of nervous system dysregulation, as we kind of just share with myself. Sometimes that's anxiety, sometimes that's more anger, anger. And in this dysregulated state, your brain is going to be more likely to trigger pain symptoms, as it's like alarm system going off right.

Speaker 1 17:27

And again, it's not the brain or the pain trying to harm us.

Speaker 2 17:31

It's the brain alerting us that, hey, something's going on here yeah, it's a's a protective mechanism and we may even may feel particularly scared or frustrated by the pain and symptoms, because I would suspect, and I would argue, that a highly sensitive person, their experience of pain and symptoms may be different than someone who isn't.

Speaker 1 17:54

I don't have data to like why would you say?

Speaker 2 17:56

that Well, and I don't have an actual study to like hang this on, but this is just my opinion and my thoughts, so listeners bear in mind.

Speaker 1 18:06

He might be very sensitive if you He'll try not to be sensitive.

Speaker 2 18:10

I get all these comments after he might.

Speaker 1 18:13

I was just going to say, if you disagree, he might react sensitively, but that's okay.

Treatment and Celebration of Sensitivity

Speaker 2 18:17

That's okay, I'll work it through. He'll work it through, but I think it makes sense because when you think about someone who's highly sensitive, I think they're going to feel emotions, both pleasant and unpleasant, in probably a deeper, maybe more intense way, more intense way.

Speaker 1 18:33

Ah, like Hermione doesn't feel any emotion.

Speaker 2 18:34

Yeah, hermione is just like cool. She's kind of clicked off. There's something going on there. She wants to eat us.

Speaker 2 18:42

But anyways, when it comes to pain and symptoms, wouldn't you think it's just another sensation? Would a highly sensitive person, would their relationship with their symptom be different? And I don't know the answer to that, but I think it's something to consider. But I do think that someone's highly sensitive when they have pain or symptoms, their emotional and nervous system response is probably even bigger than someone who's not highly sensitive, right? So all of a sudden, they have more fear, more frustration, more freeze response to the actual sensations of pain and symptoms.

Speaker 2 19:14

Yeah, which is going to create this feedback loop, sensitization cycle, as you talk about it, where you have pain and symptoms and you have dysregulation, more dysregulation, more pain symptoms, and it just goes on and on. So really breaking down, like how this can take place. The other thing I think is really important to talk about, as I just mentioned, is because sensitive people, myself included, often experience intense emotions. A lot of people learn to fear the emotional sensations, right, and they also have fear expressing them, I think outwardly, because if interactions with others is overwhelming, then it would make sense. Someone's not going to go and openly and appropriately express their emotions?

Speaker 1 19:58

Well, and I think sometimes we can get the message that, hey, that intense emotional reaction is not appropriate or okay. Whether that's right or wrong, I think often we can get that feedback which will create more avoidance.

Speaker 2 20:12

I think it's such a good point because people get invalidated.

Speaker 1 20:17

Yeah good point because people get invalidated, yeah, and so it makes sense why we try to click off or hide the emotional part or the expression of emotions, because for a lot of people, they were told that their emotional response never made sense well and I think, like you and I have worked through this a bit throughout our relationship and I know I've been maybe not great sometimes and not honoring your emotions when they're big, or I've been kind of like oh, like, what is this emotion? Why is it so big? That's not okay. I've probably given you that messaging a little bit sometimes.

Speaker 2 20:51

Yeah, and I think, well, I appreciate that, but I do think it's such a it's a hard thing. Relationships this is my statement. Relationships this is my. This is my statement. Relationships are hard With friends.

Speaker 1 21:02

Tedder's looking at me like being like it's hard Anne. In his eyes it's hard, anne. I see that it's difficult, it's okay.

Speaker 2 21:08

But you know it's difficult in these relationships and I think that's what like nervous system awareness can really bring, especially with like your partner or your loved one is understanding them.

Speaker 1 21:23

Yes.

Speaker 2 21:23

Like I understand, my son is going to respond way bigger when someone says something mean to them at school than maybe another boy his age that doesn't have that sensitivity trait. Right, it doesn't mean his emotions are invalid, but it's just, it's the understanding that we're going to right. Like we understand he's more sensitive. He's going to need more support. We're going to need to help him work it through. Approach his emotions in small doses. That's what we're trying to work through. But I think for so many people that it's just this emotional repression takes place and that makes it more likely for your brain to trigger chronic pain, chronic symptoms. Yeah, right back to Dr John Sarno. We've known this for a long time. When you repress emotions, emotional energy, your pain symptom sensitivity is going to go up.

Speaker 1 22:17

Yeah.

Speaker 2 22:19

And, more importantly, Sensitive people also cope with avoidance, which we've talked about, whether that's avoidance internally or externally, avoiding overwhelming situations. And this avoidance it reinforces to the brain that we're just not safe.

Finding Value in Your Sensitivity

Speaker 1 22:36

Yeah. So again back to oh, maybe it's part of the solution which we'll talk about now. Not avoiding anymore that can feel incredibly scary to a highly sensitive person. That's maybe been avoiding, yeah, but we want to talk about treatment. We want to talk about solution right now. One thing we want to say is there's many positives to being a highly sensitive person and it's important to acknowledge that. And so often when we're highly sensitive we're also more tapped into creativity and passion, empathy for others, deep interpersonal relationships, sensitive to beauty and pleasant sensations and I'm reading a list here that tanner says better therapists and helpers. I feel like there might be a bit of backlash out there by the non-sensitive people.

Speaker 2 23:23

Keep your non-sensitive people, tanner. What are you doing here? No, I'm sticking to that. Oh, comment away people. You make the comments, tanner is saying better.

Speaker 1 23:34

Therapists and helpers highly sensitive people.

Speaker 2 23:37

One thing that I think is so important to understand here is that there is positives, yeah, and I think there's career paths for people that are more highly sensitive, where they can use their secret superpowers. I like that there is that, like our son, has such an ability to understand his friend's emotions, where I think some of his friends have no clue what's going on in other people's minds, but he has such an awareness, yeah, and naturally moving into being a therapist, not that we're making our son be a therapist, but he's gonna have more of an ability to connect and empathize in a deep way with someone.

Speaker 1 24:21

Well, and that's it, and so I think in terms of healing, it's got to start with compassion, it's got to start with understanding and maybe even like hey, in a deep way with someone Well, and that's it. And so I think, in terms of healing, it's got to start with compassion, it's got to start with understanding and maybe even like hey, I do recognize that I'm highly sensitive, but instead of being angry at myself for that or avoiding or trying to hide it, kind of creating compassion, self-compassion and tapping into where this can be, is a really good thing.

Speaker 2 24:44

Yeah, and I think such a key to this is restoring that sense of safety internally and externally to stimuli Like I know that travel will always be more overwhelming to me than to lots of people, but I've learned to restore a sense of safety as best I can. And you know, talk to me, in 10 years I'll probably hopefully even have more, have more inability to do that. But this is something we talk about a lot in our approach, right with embodiment practices, where we're getting exposure to being in our body and connecting with the sensations with a sense of safety so there's got to be exposure, there's got to be move away from that avoidance moving towards whether the like the triggers, um like traveling for Tanner.

Speaker 1 25:25

You got to be move away from that avoidance, moving towards whether the like the triggers, um like traveling for tanner.

Speaker 2 25:29

You got to do some traveling but also connecting with those sensations, connecting with the high sensitivity, and so stopping avoidance is important yeah, like it's so key because we need to approach and face the fears of the things like that our brain has really found overwhelming. Yeah, and our job is to teach the brain that these sensations, these external factors, are actually safe to be with.

Speaker 1 25:56

And I think that also means that, as we're saying, being with the emotions and maybe the heightened sensitivity we're feeling, of allowing that to be there and creating safety with it.

Speaker 2 26:06

Yeah, and I think the other side of this that we talk about, which you're kind of mentioning there, is just gaining more access to a regulated state, like in our approach when we're working with clients or with people in our digital course. We talk about safety signals. These are practices like breath work, meditation, movement, nature, safe self-talk and connection to people or pets. So I know my nervous system is more sensitive. Something like a small financial bump. I'm going to feel greater than probably you am. That's okay and I can feel, feel it, I can get exposure to it, as we just talked about.

Speaker 1 26:47

but I have the ability, using these safety signals, to come back to regulation and and level things off and one thing that's helpful in our relationship, like we're talking about, is I know that, so I know he's going to be a bit more sensitive to this. I know he might feel it more intensely, have bigger emotions around this, and for me I try maybe not always wonderfully, but I try to create space for that and compassion as well.

Speaker 2 27:16

Yeah, and I do appreciate that. I think we have a good system and I think that's so key in any relationship is just knowing where a person's nervous system is at through communication, so we can support one another.

Speaker 1 27:29

Yeah.

Speaker 2 27:30

And another thing that you've already mentioned today, anne, is we need self-compassion instead of self-blame. So many people that are highly sensitive, they just blame themselves for being this way and they try to kill that trade-off, and just fighting against it perpetually is just going to dysregulate us more. And so there is that acceptance of this being part of us, part of our nervous system, and the celebration, like when you went through all the positive things that come out of being highly sensitive. There's this celebration of who we are and this part of us you think about evolutionarily. I think this is an interesting point. If that number is correct that 15 to 20% of us are highly sensitive, that would be a pretty big number to be an error that would be a pretty big number to be an error.

Speaker 2 28:30

Like I think there is benefit evolutionarily for a portion of the population to be more sensitive.

Speaker 1 28:36

Yeah, of course.

Speaker 2 28:37

And I think we need to remind ourselves of that yeah, that there is great benefits. There's great benefits for yourself, for your family, for the world that you can bring by leaning into this and using this trait in a very meaningful way and an empowering way.

Speaker 1 28:56

Yeah, so really, the message is don't try to get rid of it.

Speaker 2 28:59

No, we want to bring more regulation on board, but I know I'm going to be sensitive my whole life and that's okay.

Speaker 1 29:06

What do you like about your sensitivity?

Speaker 2 29:08

tether you know one thing that I like about it um wow, it's hard to pick one. There's so many.

Speaker 1 29:19

You created a sensitive family.

Speaker 2 29:21

Yeah, we created a sensitive family besides our cat. Hermione.

Speaker 1 29:25

Yeah, she's the odd one out. I quite love Hermione Mm. You know Mainly you, mainly me.

Speaker 2 29:32

Not many of us are connected with Hermione. We made a sensitive family, but I think one thing I like is my ability. When I think even about content creation, like YouTube podcast, I think about how being sensitive helps me. It helps me with storytelling, helps me to be creative. It helps me to some degree, I believe, deeper understand. You know what a person needs while they're healing their chronic pain and symptoms. What they need to hear, what, what things are going to be helpful and symptoms. What they need to hear what things are going to be helpful. And I think that comes from the sensitivity part of me, that ability for me to do that. So I think there is so many benefits and we want people to think about this. What is one thing that you like about your sensitivity? It doesn't mean that some things aren't hard about it we already know that but what are the things that are nice about it and that that you value?

Speaker 1 30:27

well, and another way to think about is then okay, how do I express my sensitivity, how do I recognize it, honor it, and then what do I do to express it?

Speaker 2 30:35

yeah, and we put a lot of thoughts into sensitivity highly sensitive people when we created our digital course too yeah because we really made it this massive place where people can go through, they can find out what's going to work well for their nervous system, what practices, what education, what strategies. Because we want people to not just heal their chronic pain and illness main main goal of our work and this podcast and all of our free content and our paid content, such as our digital course but we also want people to learn to work with their nervous system and live a life more fully that they actually want to live and they actually want to move forward with.

Speaker 1 31:21

Yeah, for sure, and I think there's links connected to this if people are interested in looking into that.

Speaker 2 31:26

Yeah, the links are in the description of this episode, so I hope this podcast episode was helpful for everyone.

Speaker 1 31:33

Yeah, definitely, I think, a needed topic to be addressed.

Speaker 2 31:37

And we will talk to you all next week. Talk to you next week.

Speaker 1 31:46

Thanks for listening. For more free content, check out the links for our YouTube channel, instagram and Facebook accounts in the episode description.

Speaker 2 31:59

We wish you all healing.