The Energy Behind Your Actions Matters More Than What You Do!

In this empowering and heartfelt episode of You First: A Journey to Self, we dive deep into the transformative power of energy, gratitude, and intention. We explore how the energy behind your choices shapes your life.

Maria shares personal stories of resilience, self-discovery, and the lessons learned through embracing gratitude, tapping into the energy of abundance, and letting go of misaligned actions. You'll uncover practical ways to shift your energy, deepen your connection to yourself, and approach life, love, and success from a place of empowerment and fulfillment.

Tune in as we explore how the energy you bring to your relationships, work, money, and self-care not only impacts those areas but sets the tone for the life you create. Plus, get inspired to redefine success—not through revenge or external validation—but by living a life you're truly in love with.

Grab your favorite journal, take a deep breath, and get ready to reflect on the energy you're putting into every part of your life. This is a conversation you don’t want to miss as we close out the year and step into what’s next.

Need extra support from Maria? Join MUSE Energy, her exclusive women 's-only channel on Instagram, for more insights and inspiration! - https://www.instagram.com/direct/inbox/?thread_key=8628881520460159

For personalized 1:1 coaching, visit Maria’s website at mariafuentes.net or email her at info@mariafuentes.net for guidance.- https://mariafuentes.net/

Follow Maria on Instagram- https://www.instagram.com/_maria.fuentes_/

Transcript

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where in your life as you're listening to this, are you doing things in the wrong energy and the energy of spitefulness of anger of, I have two energy instead of I desire to, I get to, I love my life. This is amazing. I'm going to create this with this in mind instead, because this feels really aligned to who I am. Two different energies Welcome to You First, a journey to self podcast, where we empower women to rediscover their true, authentic selves and regain personal power. If you are ready for a major shift, you've come to the right place. I am your host, Maria Fuentes, an expert in women's emotional mastery and self discovery. With a degree in psychology and nearly two decades of experience, I am passionate about addressing the challenges women face monthly. Self love, healthy relationships, and emotional awareness. I've had the privilege of coaching so many incredible women and witnessing their transformation through the methods we'll discuss on this podcast. This show is your weekly space to shift your perspective, find inspiration within and heal in ways that feel true to you. I'm so grateful you're here. Let's dive into this week's episode. Hello, my beautiful muses. And welcome back to another week's episode. I am going to talk to you about something that's been having on my mind lately, especially because I had a big life transition recently, and I really just been sitting with this. And then I got on social media today. And I saw. that trend, that women in male fields. And I was like, oh my gosh, the energy that we're putting out there, women, like we need to do better and be better. And so let's talk about that because I truly believe that. The energy you do things with is more important than what you actually do. And I'll elaborate in different ways so that you guys can catch my drift. And I also want to say before I actually start the episode, I forgot I had an announcement to make the next two Mondays because it's right before two big holidays, which is Christmas and new. Year's. I am going to not release an episode. Especially because I am cooking up something exciting for the new year and the podcast. So. I'm going to focus those two weeks on that and working on getting that set up for you guys. So don't worry. The podcast is not going anywhere. It's actually coming in even bigger and better in January. So. Super excited about that. So anyways, let's dive into this energy that I'm talking about. An energy, that's something you can touch. Right? Like we always talk about energy and people are like, what is energy? And it's the feeling that you are in. So let's talk about that when you're doing anything for other people, for yourself or your business for your children. For your work for whatever you're doing, what feeling are you feeling and what energy are you putting into that? So think of energy as like the by-product of the feelings you're feeling. So if you feel like everything's negative and the day is just sucking and everything's terrible, then your energy is going to be along those lines. And so people are going to feel that from you. I mean, we've all been in rooms with people that are like extra, loud and obnoxious or need attention. And we're like, girl, we can. feel you a mile away, like settle down. you almost want to like, people like that, but then you're like, oh my gosh, you're so crunched, you don't even want to be around that person. So. Think of that. let's talk about that people that are needy that need constant validation that are like attention seekers. They're usually in lack mentality, right? Their feelings, their emotional states usually lack. There's not enough. No one loves me. No one validates me. I, I can't get enough. I can't do enough. And so the people that taking action in their days are based off that energy. And instead of I need, I need more, I need more anymore, anymore. And eventually the people around you get sick and tired of that, feeling that energy that You're giving them. The energy of like nothing's ever good enough. And all I do is, do, do, do for you, and you're just never happy. That's what happens when people are in lack and, and they're in that emotional state, they give off needy energy. I need validation. And usually for people like that, things don't work out. Because God doesn't appreciate neediness. God's like, I will always provide you with everything you need. Or if you believe in the universe, whatever your thing is, I believe in God and God always gives us what we need. And so if we're in a needy energy, if we're in like nothing's good enough, nothing will ever work out. I'm in a bad mood or life just sucks if we're in. lock. Which is a choice. We won't get any more of what we want. We'll get less of what we want. We'll get more of crap that we don't want is what's going to happen. And so when we take action in anything it's important for us to be like, what is my emotional state? And what energy am I putting into this? And the reason, like I said, at the beginning of the episode, I've had a big life transition recently, and I started new venture. And I'll just say, now I can finally talk about it, which is so exciting. And because I started my own commercial insurance agency, which if you've followed me here for a while, you know, that that's my main money maker. I've been insurance for about eight years and in commercial insurance for a less than two years, but I just decided to venture out on my own. But this decision didn't come out of like, oh, let me just venture out on my own. This sounds like a great idea. It came from me having turbulence in the job that I was in and leadership there. I did not like the leadership. I didn't appreciate the leadership. I didn't like how it was treated. In two occasions. And even though I talked to the owner who's the one that actually brought me in and pretty much begged me to come work for him. I realized that his leadership and who he is as an owner, there's a big mismatch. And so it was never going to be happy at that place at that job. And honestly, I'm just not a job type of person. I've dabbled in entrepreneurialship and I've gone full time. I've gone back to insurance. I've done so many different things and I've started so many different businesses. But when I started this one, I might open up the LLC when I was like, I'm sick of this job. so sick of these people. I'm never going to work for corporate America. Again, they saw how can they devalue me like that? I started getting into a little bit of victim hood. And I was really frustrated because I was like, I've sold so much for these people. I've sold more than most agencies. So with multiple salespeople, I've done just on my own. And so I couldn't fathom why they would treat somebody That's bringing in incomes for them. So poorly. And so I started this business and LLC and everything the first month and a half, I would say I didn't have this revelation recently. So maybe the first month and a half or so. or more actually, I started that in September. Sort of like all the behind the scene actions in September. So at least September, October, We're very like resentful months. For me. And I was doing things out of the energy of spitefulness out of, well, they'll see. And I'll just go do my own thing and I don't need them. And how can they and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And then around maybe like, I don't know, a month ago or so. I was like, wait a minute. I listened to a podcast and. They talked about energy and business. And they were like, how did you start your business? Where did it come from? why did you start your business? Did it come from LA? They didn't have any money. Did it come from corporate America that it come from and whatever, you know, all these different reasons, they were just not very positive or good high energy frequencies. And I was like, whoa. I totally started this because I was mad. And for just wanting to show them that I could just do it on my own. But then I realized after listening to that podcast and piecing what made sense of that podcast to my own life, I was like, well, that's not the vibe. That's not the energy I want to put into this, business because I'm going to have rough days. rough weeks, rough months. I am positive of that. Right. That's just business. That's just life. And so if I am not setting the tone of how I want this business to run and the energy, I want it to run from the beginning. If I'm just doing it too. in spite of, and because fuck them, I'm not going to be successful or happy while I'm doing this. And so I had to shift the perspective and I was like, you know what? I learned so much in that job. And I also learned through those tough times where I was not happy with leadership and how to be a better leader. And so instead of, in spite of, I'm just going to take the lessons with me and now the new vibe, the new energy for the businesses. I want to do this to create financial freedom for myself and for other people, as I start hiring other people. And I hope to give another sales person like me, the ability of a healthy work environment that they're happy with. And so that's been my mission every morning. I'm like, okay, I'm so excited. Like I get to do this. I get to wake up. It's actually December 4th. Now this is my first solid week of just doing my own thing. I finally finished with my old job, around Thanksgiving week. And. That's when I realized like, energy is more important than what I do, because I can sit here and sell insurance every single day. But if I'm doing in the energy of like, I better sell so much, because I remember that I have to prove to other people that I can make it in. That I am going to be successful in I never needed them. If I could do it from that energy you want, it's not gonna feel fulfilling for me and too. It won't matter. When I do make the money, it won't matter because I did it for other people. And so if you resonate with that story in any area of your life, like take it for what it is. And see where that fits in your life. Because after I thought about this, I also realized that I did this after my divorce. I was with somebody that was very verbally abusive, you know, and I mean, I'm not going to sit here and play the victim. I was married to him for seven years and I was not the best back. So I can't even sit here and act like a victim of that. But. I always told them I was like, words really hurt me. Like words really. Mean a lot to me. And. After he tried getting back with me after my divorce, there was a few months where he was like, just angry at me. And he said something to me, like in the basis of, you're never going to really Mount to anything. Because you're only as far as you are in life because of me, which is absolutely not true. And I knew that, but still like words. Where it's trigger you. Words hurt you. And so after my divorce, I was like, oh, whoa, fuck him. I'm going to show him, I'm going to. Make the best life I can. I'm going to be so happy. I'm going to be in a neat relationship. And I started doing things with that in the back of my mind, like, oh, I remember when he said this and I let that fuel me for a little bit. Until I realized that. The fuel came from anger. Right. And I think that that could be good. Sometimes that anger helps us move. It's a high frequency. lower vibration emotion because it does help us move when we're angry. We usually take action. Especially after breakups where like we'll show with them and we'll go get two PhDs, buy a new house, buy a new car, you know, lose 20 pounds women. We are pretty powerful after a breakup, but I realized. That that was not the vibe for my life. That is not how I wanted it. I didn't want to live my life. Angerly this was somebody I cared for and I loved for so many years. And why would I hold onto this anger? Even if he said hurt me, let me just feel hurt. Let me just feel my emotions and move on and live my life from the energy of. I can fucking do anything. I want the world's my oyster, what do I want to do? My life is beautiful and it's going to be as beautiful as I grow. And that's when I even, focused on my personal development even more because I was like, you know, everyone thinks that the biggest revenge after a breakup or when somebody does something wrong to you is. Financial gains or the way you look, but really, if you want to go there, if you want to think about revenge, How about being the happiest person after breakup, like truly happy and enjoy with your life. And fulfillment with your life and in love with your life. That's the biggest glow up that's something that no one can take from you. Money can come and go. The way you look will come and go. You're going to get older and you get wrinkly. That's just shit. This is going to happen. But if you are internally happy, no one, it can take that from you. And so where in your life as you're listening to this, are you doing things in the wrong energy and the energy of spitefulness of anger of, I have two energy instead of I desire to, I get to, I love my life. This is amazing. I'm going to create this with this in mind instead, because this feels really aligned to who I am. Two different energies and one is going to get you more of the same. And the other is going to get you more of the same. And so if you are angry, if you're doing things out of misalignment, if you're doing things in spite of, if you're doing things out of commitment, because you said you would, and you. Don't really want to do it, blah, blah, blah, whatever you're going to get more of that energy back. But the opposite is true too. If you're doing things out of alignment out of, yes, I absolutely want this. Yes. That's a hard, yes, absolutely. This is what I desire in my life. How can I bring more joy into my life? How can I bring more gratitude into my life? Which I'll get into gratitude here in a second. You're going to get more of those things back. And so if you think of your emotional state as a baseline to what your energy says to other people, I think of your energy as a magnet to what you want in life and you desire in life. The problem with most of us, myself included up until two years ago, even though been doing personal development for the last seven, eight years healing organ through my traumas, rewiring my subconscious And, working with spiritual guidance. The one thing I was missing was my energy. I was still in lack. I was still in victim hood for a long time. I was still in like, oh, that's just not possible for me. I was in lack of gratitude. So let's talk about gratitude. Actually. I said I would come back to it. This is so important. This is one shift I would say out of anything that I've done that has completely changed my life. And my energy. It's tapping into gratitude every single day. We all have so much to be grateful for. And if you're listening to this and you're like, oh, it's just hard to be grateful for. Some things sometimes, because life is really hard. If you've never struggled financially, this might not relate to you, but it's easier for me to tap into gratitude because I think of all the years, that me and my mom, when she was a single mom, Lived from home to home getting evicted, getting or cars, reboot, not having any money, her being a cleaning lady, her having multiple jobs, me not knowing where my next meal was going to come from me having this uncertainty and this anxiety in my life. Any time I wake up. I live in a beautiful place. Now with TJ, I've lived in other beautiful big houses before. I've lived in not so great places. But ever since the last few years, and the gravity started a lot, I want to say like three, four years, it takes a while for me to get things, I guess, apparently, but. Anytime I lived anywhere else. Like. I am so grateful. That I have a roof over my head, and I don't have to worry about where. My next money's going to come from because even the times that I didn't make a lot of money in the times that I have made a lot of money, I always just had more trust in myself that I could do better, do more, and can give myself that safety and that certainty. That had food that I didn't have to worry about where food was going to come next. And even the times that I've had to like tougher times where things felt tight. was like, how can I be resourceful? How can I find more money somehow? And then I tapped into that gratitude of like, wow, I can't believe I thought of that. That's great. We have so much to be grateful for. And so for me, it's easier to tap into gratitude because when I think of like cleaning ladies, coming to clean my house, remember there was a time where I was a little kid going to other people's huge houses, or my mom used to clean. And I was like, wow, people live in houses like this. And my mom was a cleaning lady. I came from nothing. And I promise himself in 19 that I make sure that I never had that uncertainty again. And I've had them in different moments in my life. I'm 34. between 19 and 34. I've had them multiple times. But now looking back, I'm so grateful for even those times, because they made me more resilient to help me make better money choices to help me understand things better. And so if you're not grateful for three,$4,000 a month, whatever you're making now, You're not going to be grateful for 10. You're not going to but you're able for 15,000. You're not gonna be grateful for 20,000. If you're not grateful for the Honda accord. that you have, you're not going to be grateful for a 20, 21 Mercedes or That's not the you're wearing 25 Mercedes. You're just not. You have to be grateful for what you want. One of my most amazing mentors. She always says one foot in gratitude, one foot in desire. I have a nice car. Now I have a Tesla and it's a four year old Tesla now at this point, and I've seen the new ones drive by. I love the cyber Chuck and actually only bought this car four years ago because I saw the concept of the cyber truck. Coming out eventually. And the other day I was driving and I was like, I can't wait to get the cyber truck. And I was like, wait a minute. That's the wrong energy. And so I started touching my steering wheel and I was like, oh my gosh, I remember that my first car. That I bought was a used rental car from CarMax. And I had that car for like eight years. I overpaid on it because the interest rates and I only had$800 to put down, but I drove that car for so long. I was like, I remember when a nice car, like this felt like, so out of reach. I bought that car actually after my, me and my ex husband were separated at the time, but I bought that car because of our separation. And so I started tapping into gratitude. I was, I was driving and I was like touching the steering wheel and I was like, oh my gosh, how beautiful is my car? I get a clear ceiling. I have a soft steering wheel. It goes fast. I love going fast. Like. As simple as those little things are. It's mean to gratitude. And then I was like, oh, how will it feel when I go into a cyber truck and drive the cyber truck? How is that going to feel for me? That's going to feel like this, but better probably who knows. Let me tap into that energy and that emotion versus I can't wait. This car is old already. need a new car. this car is just shit. I need any car. Not the energy. But when you tap into the energy that you want. That's the second thing. If I had to pick a second thing that has helped me transform my life other than gratitude That has helped me transform my life with energy. First one's gratitudes. Second one is tapping into the energy. That I want to feel. We all want things. But why do you want them? Kind of like I made the example of starting my own commercial insurance agency. Do I want the money? Yes. Have I made the most amount of money in commercial insurance? Eight? Yes. Like I didn't think that money, like that was possible and insurance. So, yes, money is a big part of it, but why do I want the money? What do I want to feel? And how can I tap into that energy? I want to feel safe. I want to feel like money's not an issue. I want to feel like I can go to any store and buy anything I want and not worry about money. I want to be able to invest more. I want to set up this business so I could sell it in the future. So then I could help my family members. So if somebody needs something, money is not an issue. I don't have to ask money for permission. That's why I started this business. That's the energy that I want to tap into. So even though I'm not there yet, and I'm in the beginning, parts of my business and I'm actually just spending money versus making money right now, which is really hard. I, every morning, I'm like, okay, how can I tap into gratitude? And how can I tap into the energy of the CEO that I am the CEO that's going to make X, Y, and Z amount of money. And the next five years. What does that energy that I want to feel? I want to feel peaceful. I want to feel relaxed. I want to feel giving. Can I give money to my family members right now, probably, but not as much as I would like to. Do I feel peaceful right now. Sometimes there's a lot to do still with the business and startup is a lot of work. Do I feel the things that I want to feel in the future right now I can, to a certain extent, but how can I tap into energy more? If I can give financially to my family members and the people I want to help, how can I give them my time? How can I give them my good energy? How can I give them my support? You tap into the energy that way. How can I tap into the energy of a CEO? What decisions does a CEO make? What financial decisions does she make? How does she become less scared of money? How does she become less scared of making more money of fucking up money of doing all these things, right? The energy you want is already there. How can you tap into it, even if it's in micro doses now, because you don't have the thing you want and yet. Our energy needs to expand in order to get the things that we desire. But in order to have her energy expand, we have to create the capacity within our nervous system and our body to be able to hold those things. If we can't hold it, we drop it. We self-sabotage. We fuck it up. We find ways to just destroy the whole thing. Because it feels unsafe. If we don't feel safe in our emotions And our bodies, we're going to find ways to do the opposite of what the thing that we desire the most is. that's why The energy and how you do the things you do is more important than what you do. In romantic relationships. I guess I have to have sex with my husband. He's horny. Okay. I guess I have to have sex with my husband, I guess it's it's been a week. Oh, yes. I'll put out fine. I'll have sex. Or. Oh, my gosh. I get to make love to the man of my dreams to the man that I love. I get to tap into my feminine energy and how like this amazing sexual euphoric experience. What energy do you think your husband or boyfriend, or whoever wants to have sex with? Your friend calls you and you pick up in the middle of you being busy and you're like, okay, I only have five minutes. What do you need? And they're going through. A crisis. And you're like, oh, okay. Yeah. I just go fast, like say what you have to say fast. Cause I'm busy. Or, Hey, I'm busy, but I want to give you all my attention. Can I call you back in five minutes? What energy do you think your friend would appreciate? Oh, I guess I'll go help my family member. I told them that I would, even though I'm tired now, I don't really feel like it, but I guess I have to now, I guess I'm forced to now, I guess this is what I have to do because they're my family member. And I said, I would. Or, you call your family over, say, Hey, I'm actually exhausted today. I've had a crazy week. Can I help you for a couple hours instead of the whole day? Like I said, Or Hey can actually help you tomorrow. Is there any way we can shift this, please? really want to be there and just be helpful and I don't feel like I can in this energy. The energy and how you do the things you do matter more than what you do. People appreciate it. More people want to be around you more. My energy speaks before walk in a room. People want to be around my energy people. DM me, beautiful messages. People say beautiful things and that's just Instagram right there. Even know me. When people meet me in person, they're like, wow, you're so calm. You're so peaceful. I actually listen more than I speak when I'm around people, because. I like that more. The moment that I start speaking or over speaking people, it gives off the energy of, I don't care who you are. No. Tell me who you are. When you let people speak, they tell you exactly who they are. You just have to listen close enough. Your energy is more important. Than anything else. And it's the one thing that we give away that we give away resentfully angerly frustrated li. For the wrong reasons. We do things because we feel like we have to, instead of, I desire to, I want to. And all you do when you do that is compromise yourself and give off energy that no one wants to be around. So after this episode, I'm going to give you a little bit of homework since this is our last episode here for a couple of weeks. Especially going into the new year. Sit with yourself and ask yourself what energy am I putting into my work or business? If you're a business owner. What energy am I putting into my relationship? if you have a romantic one, if you don't have a romantic one. What energy are you putting into your friendships, your other relationships, people close to you. What energy are you putting into yourself? This is sound familiar. Oh, I'll have to go work out. I don't want to work. Oh. You really have to go to the gym? Fuck. I have to go to the gym. I haven't gone to the gym in like two weeks. I told myself I would. Or I get to go move my body. I have on my limbs. I'm so grateful. I have all my body parts. I get to go move it. And feel so good after. What energy are you putting into yourself? The most important relationship is yourself. And then finally, what energy are you putting into money? Next year. I think I'm going to talk about money a lot more on my podcast because money's important. And I truly believe like my mentor says money in the hands of great women. We do great things. And I want us all to be powerful in so many ways. And money's just a tool for power. In the sense of when you'd have to ask money for permission, you get to do more in life. But our relationship with money and the energy that we've put towards money is sometimes so negative. And I've actually had so many realizations here just recently with my own life. That my love life in the past. And my relationship with money have been so alike. And so ask yourself in all those areas in money. In your career business in your relationships, and most importantly, in your relationship with yourself, What energy are you putting into those things? And what can you release before the new year? And what can you do more of to tap into what you truly desire and the energy that you want to be matched to? And that is it's for this episode. I love you all. Thank you so much for listening. Merry Christmas and happy new year. I will catch you guys next year. And I cannot wait because like I said, I'm coming back It's a little change, but I'm excited for it because it's going to just push me out of my comfort zone here. And hopefully get me closer to you guys. So I'm super excited. And remember we have the power to change right now to shift our perspectives, to move into the energy that we want to move into, to do all the things we want to do. We have the power. Right now we don't have to wait to the beginning of the year. So ask yourself right now. What do you want to release? What do you will and what do you want more of? Again, thank you all for listening and talk to you guys next year. As we come to the close of this episode, I want to express my heartfelt gratitude and admiration for you. Taking the time to show up for yourself is an act of self love. And if this episode resonated with you, please share it with someone who might benefit. And also, if you love this episode, please rate and review us. When you do, screenshot your review and email it to us for a special gift. Our Rediscover Yourself Worksheet. This worksheet includes exercises to help you uncover your authentic self, and assess the areas of your life that are misaligned with the true you. Email it to info at maria fuentes dot net. Also stay connected with us on social media for updates and more inspiration. You can find all this information in the show notes. Again, thank you for being here and I cannot wait to continue this journey together.