What Do I Think About Guns For Self Defense?

Mandi opens up about her personal journey with firearms, from dealing with the vulnerability of her past to making the decision to own a gun for protection. Joined by her podcast editor Andrea, the two discuss the emotional weight, responsibility, and real-life experiences that shape their views on self-defense.

Mandi talks about the need for responsible gun ownership, the importance of proper training, and how she practices with her firearm. Whether you're for or against guns, this episode is a judgment-free zone where different perspectives are explored with respect, caution, and personal experience. If you've ever wondered about self-defense options—whether a gun, pepper spray, or something else—this episode will give you plenty to think about.

LESSONS LEARNED

Self-defense is a personal choice—explore what feels right for you.

Responsible gun ownership requires proper training and practice.

There are various self-defense options to feel empowered and prepared: lethal & non-lethal.

Please respect and listen to different perspectives on sensitive issues like gun ownership.

RESOURCES

JOIN my email list so you are notified of when my self defense course is live again and when we have an in person workshop on non-lethal self defense training. Sign up at awareandprepared.life at the bottom of the website.

***Don’t forget to review the show (bottom of all episodes) - is it helpful, practical, insightful?***

Book Mandi for a keynote and workshops for your school, conference or retreat to share her real life story, how she healed and practical takeaways to inspire and empower your audience.

Reach Mandi through her website AwareAndPrepared.Life or Instagram @WomenAwareAndPrepared

Transcript

You have to be present 100 percent and know what you're doing, right? So you know that day that you've put it in your waistband and you've practiced taking it out, right? If it's in your purse, you've practiced taking it out. So actually I would practice at the range with my purse and I would practice taking my gun out and shooting the target from my purse.

Not just the holster that I had on at the range.  Hey, brave one. Welcome to another episode of the aware and prepared podcast. I'm your host, Mandy Pratt, a trained domestic violence victim advocate, self defense teacher and professional speaker who teaches those feeling vulnerable how to be street smart and feel safer with more peace.

You'll hear true crime stories. But most importantly, how we might prevent crimes happening to us without judgment or shame. Of course, you deserve to live in peace and safety. So return each week to learn safety tips and emotional self defense. So we live empowered with peace. Let's be less naive and leave helplessness and worry behind.

So we can be safer, savvy, aware, and prepared. 

Welcome back brave one to another episode of the aware and prepared podcast.  Thank you so much for listening and for being a fan.  So guess what? Today's subject is super touchy, but so important. So one of the last times that I went and spoke at a conference,  I was talking about self defense as an empowerment tool, and I left time at the end to open it up for Q and a. 

And one of the questions somebody asked me was, what do you think about guns?  I was like, whew, way to come right in and put me on the spot.  But it is a really, really important question and topic.  Um, another time that I spoke, I was actually speaking at a domestic violence advocacy training. And I did Q& A at the end and somebody said, you know what, thank you so much for mentioning, you know, that we can, we can  have self defense and it just hit me like, of course, like, oh my gosh, like I never would have thought that somebody would think that you, you're not, you don't have the right to do that, I guess, because as you know, I always am sharing quotes, you know, you deserve to live in peace and safety, right?

So. We're going to talk about, um, just my own experience with guns, um, because I get questions about that. So I wanted to delve deeper into her question.  I realized that this is a touchy topic and politically charged. So my goal on my podcast, it's to make sure that all people on all political parties are welcome here because. 

These are such important topics that we're talking about and they need to be discussed  and they need to be really listened to and maybe approached with an open mind because like this topic is so, so complicated and people have so many different opinions. And I want to emphasize people have so many different experiences.

I remember one of my best friends growing up, her mom had a gun pulled on her. How do you think she feels about guns? And then there's me who had the FBI show up at my door one day and tell me that my ex is a criminal wanted for multiple bank robberies, right? Where did that leave me? That left me super vulnerable, so I felt like I needed to protect myself in a way  more serious  level than let's say pepper spray.

So  I chose to get a gun and I chose to practice with that. And I chose to take it very, very seriously. I lock that thing up when I'm not using it. That's very, very important. Right? And so I invited My buddy and my podcast editor to come on to the show today and to chat with me and kind of ask me some other questions that some of you might be thinking.

So welcome to Andrea. Hello. Thanks for having me back, Mandy. Sure, sure.  So yeah, we can just dig in and I can share more about my experience and you can ask me questions. So I'll let you go ahead and ask me some questions. Well, I'm excited to be talking about this, even though I agree with you that there's so many different angles and nuances and experiences to keep in mind.

And it does get dragged into the political arena, which we're going to try not to do because we're more taking the approach of talking about self defense, which everyone should have a right to. So this first came up for me when I realized I had a stalker when I was in my 20s, which we talked about a previous episode, but I've had to think through all of this stuff too.

And I certainly respect where everybody lands on their own personal decisions with it. And there's so many different reasons. that people do. So I'm excited to hear you hash out more of the rationale and the reasoning and the different situations. Um, and just give us a little bit of wisdom and insight from your experience.

So I guess the first question is honestly exactly What that woman asked you at that conference, like, what are your thoughts on guns like in the context of self defense and gun ownership?  I think that  people have a right to own a gun. They have a right to defend themselves.  Um, like in my instance, right, we're talking about self defense and I need something that will actually stop somebody.

So pepper spray. Yes, it might stop somebody, but it might not. Right. And in my circumstance, I was very in danger. So I needed a different level. I would love it if criminals didn't have guns either, and nobody needed them. And it was just like that, but it's not. And so I believe in responsible gun ownership.

Like I said, um, if you have a gun, you need to train with it. And you need to be very knowledgeable about it and you need to lock it up when you're not using it. We don't leave it on the top of the dresser because we think people can't reach it. We don't, it needs to be locked up, but you need to be practicing on how to get that thing out really fast.

So it's all about being aware and prepared basically. So what are some things you have to. Keep in mind as a gun owner with regards to practicing. Right. So I'll just share with you my experience and what I did. So I bought one. I bought my own. My husband has his own. I have my own. And then I trained with a professional and I went to a gun range.

And let me tell you, that was really scary  because I didn't have any experience with guns and I have high respect for those machines. And so I want to make sure that I'm using it right. And I'm not being nonchalant. And so I paid this instructor to teach me and we went to a range and I had many.

Different classes with him so I could know how to get it out quick, how to shoot different targets. And I even ended up going out and competing just because I really wanted to get comfortable with it and really, really know what I'm doing because you have to know where that round is going, right? So you have to be good at aiming and hitting your target because if you are out in public.

And you have to, you know, say there's an active shooter and he's coming for you next or something, and you have to shoot him. You want to get him not miss. Right. So again, it's just a really, really high responsibility. And one that even now, to be honest,  I'm like, Oh,  it feels scary. And so I think that we should have a very healthy respect for the machine and not treat it non chalantly.

Like  I don't. I'm not a fan of like places where you can just  carry it in your pocket and just let's, you know, it's, you gotta be, oh my gosh, like you have to be so responsible.  And do you maintain that practice once you get good? You have to keep practicing. Right. And so it's important to have muscle memory.

So your brain knows exactly what to do without even really like telling it.  And so it's important to keep up on the practicing. So you can't, let's, let's say I'm going to get a gun and I'm going to go get some instructions and I'm going to learn three times and then I'm good.  No, I wouldn't recommend that.

I would recommend putting it in your calendar. Like I'm going to go once a quarter. Or I'm going to go once a month or whatever you choose,  just make sure that you are staying consistent with it. And there's ways that you can practice at home without a gun, and you can use just like a fake gun and practicing on pulling it out.

There's different things that you can do. So yeah, it's important to get that practice in.  And what are some different ways that gun owners carry. I mean, I guess I know not all gun owners carry.  Some are just gun owners that have their firearm at home  and go to the range and that's it, or go hunting. And then other people carry, and in different states there's different laws about that.

Some states are concealed carry states, some states are open carry states, and there's different, you know, rules you have to follow. But what are some different ways that that looks in different people's everyday lives? Mm hmm.  So it's really interesting. I think way more people carry guns than you think, and that might freak you out, but it's, it's the truth.

And I also want to say some people just aren't comfortable with guns and that's totally okay. I remember Speaking to some realtors and this one gal shared that she just doesn't want to carry one. And I completely understand that. And in fact, I'm going to be hosting a workshop, uh, where we're learning with air pistols, um, because there's a lot of people who don't want to carry them.

And so it's just another option. Um, again, we're upping the level, right? So we're going up from pepper spray and some of the other things, and these air pistols will do some real damage, but, um, they're most likely not going to kill somebody. So  it's important to think of your comfort level and think of.

What you're actually going to use, because if you're not comfortable and you're not going to actually use it, then just save your money and your time and don't actually go with that. And then back to your questions, that was a little side tangent.  Um, so you mentioned like, how do people actually carry? So we live in California, um, so you have to have the CCW permit to carry in public unless you are, you know, police, um, law enforcement.

That's a whole nother. thing. We could do like a whole nother podcast episode on CCW. What does that look like? What does that entail? It's a lot. Each county is a little bit different, but, um, overall in the state, like you have to have a, a license to carry.  So it's not like the open carry States where you just  carry it and off you go and anybody can carry.

Right. And to be honest,  so I got my CCW. I can share all about that because  that was a whole thing. And then being a woman, like it's really tricky sometimes to concealed. You know, conceal and carry because you don't want to, they call print. So when you're printing, um, people can see the outline of it.

Right. And that's going to freak somebody out because they don't know that you're responsible and you're practicing, you actually know what the heck you're doing. Do accidents happen? Yeah.  Accidents happen.  But if you've practiced with somebody who knows what they're doing and you've learned all of that, you know, to keep your finger off the trigger when you're holstering your gun.

Um, things like that. So again, just being really responsible, practicing, knowing what you're doing, being mindful. So again, super important.  So how do women carry? Do they have to have it on their person? Does everyone have their firearm in a different location on their body? Like what, what are the common ways to carry?

That's a whole different world.  Yeah, it is. And for, for women, So there's a whole thing about off body carry versus on body carry, and people have very strong opinions about that as well. So there's all kinds of holsters. I have a bunch of different holsters. Ones that mean I can carry in my waistband of my pants. 

Ones, like I have, Different purses where I can carry it in my purse.  So there's different ways that you can carry it. And again, it's so depends on like where you're going for the day, what you're wearing, right? Especially for women. So it's definitely a whole nother thing. Again, I feel like you have to have the capacity for that.

You have to be present 100 percent and know what you're doing, right? So you know that day that you've put it in your waistband and you've practice taking it out, right? If it's in your purse, you've practiced taking it out. So actually I would practice at the range with my purse and I would practice taking my gun out and shooting the target from my purse, not just the holster that I had on at the range.

No, it was real life. And again, some ranges are very strict and they just have you set the gun on the counter and shoot the target that way. Um,  I like the other ones that have more flexibility. So that way I can do things like that where I practice pulling the gun from my purse and then shooting the target. 

So it sounds like there's some definite pros and cons to carrying a lethal weapon, a firearm.  You mentioned. Airsoft guns.  Um, what are some other options if someone doesn't feel comfortable going the cc route? So there's all the different tools, right? So we've talked about pepper spray. We've mentioned stun guns in one of the past episodes,  knife. 

Uh, so I like to think of carrying tools as  in different layers, right? So a knife would be Again, some people might not be comfortable carrying a knife, so that's totally okay. It's whatever you're comfortable with.  But I want something where if somebody does grab me, right, and they get beyond the pepper spray and all the other stuff, I have an option on me so I can actually protect myself.

And again, I'm going to address mindset. Can you kill somebody? Do you want to kill somebody?  Now, we never want to kill anybody, right? But again, in the realm from the lens of self defense,  if somebody is going to rape me, kill me, I don't want that to happen. So instead of you know, not having anything and just hoping for the best. 

I want to have something so I can protect myself. If that means I have to kill them. Yes. That's horrible. Like I would never want to do that, but I also want to stay alive.  Yeah. So let's say someone's listening and they're thinking, okay, I do want to step it up. I know I need more self protection and I need to have something on me.

Mandy, how do I think through what's best for me? Like, what are the pros and cons of going the firearm route versus the pepper gel and knife route? What, how do I think that through? What do I need to ask myself? I mean, obviously you've mentioned one con or two cons of having a firearm is the financial investment of  and time of like developing that much responsibility and skill with it.

So getting that skill set,  maintaining that skill set that takes money and time  and a certain mentality, like you mentioned, and another con being  as a female, it's hard to conceal a weapon on your person. So having to think through outfits and  all of that stuff sounds like a lot for probably some people.

Depending on their type of work and everything. So what are some other pros and cons that we should be thinking through if we're looking at our own situation and trying to decide what's best?  Let's see. Other pros and cons would be, I think, deciding at what level you want to protect yourself. What. Are you comfortable with, so you need to really think on that  as far as if you do want a gun and you want to conceal, and you're a woman, don't get scared by, you know, feeling like you don't have very many options.

Maybe 10 years ago, that was the truth. But now, oh my gosh, there's like so many different ways. They have ankle holsters, they have thigh holsters, they have in the waist band holsters, they have all kinds of, and all kinds of purses, and. There's a lot of different options, and if you're going somewhere and you can't bring it with you, you can have a safe in your trunk and put it in your safe and lock it in there again, you have to, you have to think about it, right?

So you want to make sure nobody's seeing you do that, right? Um, so there's kind of a lot of things to think about.  So, yeah, it's just deciding what is your level of what you need and what you're comfortable with and what you're going to practice with. Yeah. So does that answer the question? Yeah. So let's say I'm person A and I don't think it's the right fit for me to carry a firearm. 

I'm comfortable with the idea of.  pepper spray or pepper gel  and probably a knife or a stun gun. What are my next steps?  Right. So you would want to find out the best pepper spray and how to use it. I wrote a book on that because I couldn't find all of the information in one place for myself.  I think in our Podcast now, um, when they go to read the show notes, it says, text me and they can text me so they can ask me for anything.

Like, you know, where's the link to your book? It's on Amazon. Two things to know before buying pepper spray. It's kind of hard to find on there. By Mandy Pratt, or they can just text me and I'll send them. Or if they're getting my weekly emails, I'll pop that in there sometimes. So that's one tool that they can think about.

Again, I've said so many times, don't just buy it, chuck it in your purse, leave it in the bottom of your purse and think you're protected because you're not. So you have to know where you're going to keep it, um, consistently, and you have to know how to use it. And then, same thing with a stun gun, same thing with all the tools, right?

Um, you know where it is, it's easily accessible, you practice.  So even someone with not firearm weapons needs to  have a consistent practice regimen where they maintain, kind of, going through the motions. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But it doesn't have to be super gnarly. Like, Oh my gosh, like I have to train every week for an hour to like, you know, if you want to, that would be awesome.

But honestly, like we're all so busy, so keep it realistic. So maybe it's, um, Every first  Saturday of the month or every other Sunday, whatever you want to choose, you know, and it can just be for like two minutes. Right. So with the pepper spray, it's, I pull it out. Let's say I couldn't see. Right. So I pull it out.

What's it feel like? And you could even time yourself, right. Just for kicks. So yeah, I think anything, any tool that you want to carry, like you should definitely know how to use it and practice with it.  It doesn't have to be such.  a burden, right? So you don't have to practice your pepper spray every week and like for an hour, you know?

Yeah. What if, okay, so now let's say we're talking to person B, And they're like, okay, I do have a situation in my life where, or I live in an area or whatever it is. I feel that I do want to eventually carry a weapon, a firearm. What are their steps? What's the process? I mean, I'm assuming it's become a firearm owner.

If you want to conceal carry a firearm. Maybe make your purchase something that's small  enough to carry like a nine millimeter or a little tiny little 38 or something and then get good at shooting. Is that kind of the next step and then apply if they have to for a yeah, right. Permit. Yeah. And I would recommend a nine millimeter.

They make ones that are sized so you can conceal it. Mm hmm. Yeah. Um, yeah, that's pretty much  the beginning. And then you would look on your county sheriff website and they'll tell you exactly what to do. And interesting enough to know it's been changing a lot. So I just went on cause I need to renew. And I was like, holy crap, it's totally different.

Oh my gosh. And like, It's it's kind of like my husband said it's a game. He's like, it's a game. And it seems like they don't really want you to have it because it's like, not no pun intended, but literally like a moving target. Like, you think it's this and then you go back on and it's like, Oh, actually, no, you needed to apply like Five months ago.

And it now costs this and you need this much training. It was, it's been so interesting because I first got it in 2016 and here we are in 2024, right? So where I am, it expires every two years. So every two years I need to go through this again. I need to send in my freaking story and pay all the money. 

And each time there's a little bit more training. The first time there wasn't any training. And I was like, um, This doesn't feel so right. Like, what if nobody else is training? Like, that's kind of sketchy. And so luckily they made us start having at least like a little bit of training. And then you have to like, go to the range and be certified.

So the range, you know, person, they check it off and sign it and stuff. I'm like, okay, that's much better. But, but now it's like.  Holy crap. Like if you're a new  app application, it's like 16 hours. And now if you're renewing, it's like eight again, I think it's important to know all that, but it's like, let's, let's balance it also.

Right. So it's just become really interesting. And then in California, there was a law passed where now we can't carry it.  Pretty much.  A majority of public places. So it makes me think, well, then, like, why am I going to do this? Why am I going to pay all this money and go do all this stuff if I can't carry it?

Right? And it's very, very frustrating. So. I understand, right? We need better gun control. I get that. But then you have somebody like me who's at risk and I'm trying to protect myself. Well, now I can't freaking carry it anywhere. So what's the point? So now I'm looking at more of like the air pistol type of thing too.

Because I need to be able to carry it when I am going where I'm at church, I want to be able to care. Well, right now the law says I can't carry a church. Well, how many times have we heard about active shooters that come into a church and just mow people down?  Right? So I don't want that to be me. So I'm going to need to adjust.

And that's another important  point is adjust.  So sometimes you'll have to adjust with what you're comfortable with. Maybe you tried out a firearm and you're like, Oh crap, like that doesn't feel right for me or whatever. Do I need to change it up? Or maybe you're just using pepper spray and you're like, Oh, this doesn't feel like enough.

And guess what? My situation just changed. And now I'm at risk. I have a stalker.  You might want a little more than pepper spray. If that's the case, right?  So it's this evolving thing, right? So you're evolving, maybe the laws are evolving. And by the way, I'm not saying the laws should not involve in some situations, some aspects, right?

We know about the law, which, and I think this was championed in San Diego, where, um, they now, if you are domestic violence, offender. You're not allowed and you have a felony. You're not allowed to have a gun, right? So of course I have feelings about that because I'm a domestic violence victim, right? Do I want my ex to be able to have a gun?

That's not a good idea. So it's tricky. Cause it's like, yes, people should be able to have a gun, but it's like, Ooh, if you've done. violence in the past, then that's not a good idea. So it's like, I get it like laws and feelings about it and different experiences, like we were talking about. So there's just, it's complicated.

It's not black and white in my experience. That's.  What I see.  Yeah, I agree.  So having warned person B Thoroughly that it's a little bit of a process and that things are always changing and updating I have a lot of follow up questions popping into my head So I'm wondering if we should say goodbye for now and then end the show Hop on to a part two for this conversation next time.

What do you think? Yeah, that's a good idea. So in order to not overwhelm you, we've chopped this up into a couple of different episodes. So please make sure that you're following this podcast.  So if you're an apple, like you would go to the top, right? Little three dots or. Three lines, and you can scroll down and you'll see, follow the show.

And if you want to share it with somebody, you can do that there too, but make sure that you join us again next week as we continue on the conversation, because this is such an important one to, to talk about and so many things to think through. So thank you so much, Andrea, for being here and helping us talk through this.

Thanks for having me.  Thanks for being a fan of the aware and prepared podcast. Show it some love by leaving a review and don't forget to hit follow. So you can catch future episodes to book me to speak and transform your audience, go to my website, aware and prepared dot life, L I F E to join my VIPs who get each episodes, lessons learned resource links, and more.

Sent directly to you sign up is also at my website where you'll find a free gift. When you do the link is in the show notes, I'll talk with you next week. Remember you are worthy of a safe and peaceful life.