Fuel For Thought
Join hosts Tracy Elizabeth and Nicole Heller on Fuel For Thought, the empowering podcast designed to help women unleash a healthier lifestyle. With their expert insights and unwavering dedication, Tracy and Nicole delve into the challenges faced by women in achieving optimal health and provide actionable strategies to overcome them. From debunking myths about nutrition to exploring the latest fitness trends, they leave no stone unturned in their quest to fuel your body, mind, and soul.
Each episode of Fuel For Thought offers a wealth of practical advice, inspiring stories, and interviews with leading experts in the health and wellness field. Tracy and Nicole bring their unique perspectives and personal journeys, making every discussion relatable and authentic. Whether you're struggling with emotional eating, searching for sustainable weight loss techniques, or seeking to boost your overall well-being, this podcast serves as your go-to resource for transformation.
Through lively conversations, evidence-based research, and practical tips, Fuel For Thought will equip you with the knowledge and tools needed to make informed decisions about your health. Uncover the secrets to maintaining a balanced diet, discover effective workout routines, and learn how to build a positive relationship with food. Fuel For Thought embraces the mantra of relentlessly overcoming obstacles to achieve your desired results.
Tune in to Fuel For Thought and join Tracy Elizabeth and Nicole Heller as they inspire, motivate, and empower women to take charge of their health, harness their inner strength, and unlock their true potential. Subscribe now to embark on a journey towards a healthier, happier you!
Fuel For Thought
Thriving Against the Odds: Resilience, Self-Care, and Kim's Cancer Journey - FOLLOW-UP INTERVIEW!
What happens when life forces you to redefine strength and resilience? Our returning guest, Kim, shares her incredible journey as a breast cancer survivor, facing physical and emotional battles with an inspiring grace.
Listen to our original interview with Kim from Season 2 Episode 4: https://www.buzzsprout.com/2136737/episodes/14544174-braving-the-breast-cancer-battle-kim-s-tale-of-resilience-early-detection-and-the-strength-of-support-systems
From enduring hair loss and emergency health scares to navigating chemotherapy and surgeries, Kim's story is a beacon of hope and courage. Her candid recounting of these experiences not only inspires but also highlights the importance of self-care and mental fortitude during life's toughest challenges.
Kim opens up about the power of setting boundaries and prioritizing mental health, especially in times of adversity. She encourages listeners to let go of guilt and embrace the freedom to choose joy, illustrating how self-care can lead to more meaningful interactions with loved ones. By sharing her insights on maintaining a positive mindset and drawing strength from her community, Kim demonstrates that resilience is not just about surviving but thriving, even when the odds seem daunting.
Listeners will find inspiration in Kim's commitment to giving back and her continued journey of self-discovery. From starting a blog to volunteering at a cancer center, Kim shows how sharing one's story can transform lives and leave a lasting legacy. Join us as we celebrate Kim's ongoing journey, the promise of a happy ending, and the power of hope for those facing similar struggles. Her experiences remind us all that, with support and determination, we can write our own stories of resilience and empowerment.
Follow our journey on Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/fuel_for_thought_podcast/
Welcome to Fuel for Thought, empowering women to live healthier lifestyles. I'm Tracy Elizabeth, I'm Nicole Heller and we have a special guest here again, so excited. Go ahead, girl.
Speaker 2:Hey, hi. We are here with Kim at our official little over one year from our last episode, right? Together right, that was like a few weeks before your year started.
Speaker 3:No, it was. It was one. I was actually going through treatment, beginning of treatment, right well, why don't you tell everybody your name first of kim hi, hi, everybody let's go, yeah so we were really excited just to bring you back here.
Speaker 2:We were together on our last recording and we were like just reflecting back to all the episodes and we were thinking about that first episode for you and it just happened to be that we had both read your post on it being a full year. We had talked about it and like how you were feeling and whatever. And I'm like, oh my god, like look what happened in a year. Like we need to update. Like everybody that like was inspired by your episode was going to get their boobies checked from your episode. That cried over your episode. Like we need, they need an update to like hear what like went on because like it's been like a year, right. So we wanted to play a little clip from our first episode with you and this was the beginning of it all and like, like I mean, I have so much emotion behind it, but I know you have emotion behind it and like, all right, let's just play, let's just play, let's just play.
Speaker 2:Play the tape. Play the tape.
Speaker 3:As much as this sucks and it's like why me? It happened to me because God chooses his strongest soldiers.
Speaker 3:And I know that he knows I'm going to be able to get through this. I may not get it right now. I may not get it right now, I may not get it in a year, but one day I will understand, there will be a positive spin to this and that will be what my story is. This is not my story. This is only part of my story. How do you feel about it? It's been a year, so it's surreal in a way, to kind of realize that I'm done with treatment. When I first started can we get a bell?
Speaker 2:I was like our listeners have walked away from that episode with that right and like that's where you were just starting out and where are we going to be, and this is only part of your story and you're a soldier like you're done with treatment it was.
Speaker 3:it was an interesting and very long road. I feel like I was not really ready for it, but kind of was. I mean you know, the first round was really really difficult for it, but kind of was. I mean, you know, the first round was really really difficult. I lost my hair, I lost my eyebrows, I lost my eyelashes, everything, and it made me feel really crappy, you know, like I had terrible weeks but I made it through and it was, you know, always a countdown All right, one out of four, two out of four, three out of four, ok, we're done.
Speaker 3:And then it was a crazy couple of weeks after that. In between my first round and my second round, I had planned a vacation with my family and I'm in the middle of the Atlantic. We went on a cruise and I get a call to my room from my uncle that my dad passed away. So it was a crazy couple of months. So came home, dealt with, that started my new round. The new round had its own set of side effects. I was okay, usually the day of they gave me benadryl so I napped most of the time we both napped and nicole was with me for everyone.
Speaker 3:We both napped through it.
Speaker 2:We did, we were like all right time to take a snooze. I brought like a cozy, like sweater and like we knew like it was like as soon as they hung the Benadryl. We had like seven minutes till she passed out, so we got as much conversation as we can in those seven minutes and then we both, like, took it out, yep, zonked out and then, um, I did the second round.
Speaker 3:I was scheduled for 12. It was once a week for 12 weeks consecutively. I made it to 10 because the neuropathy, which is a huge side effect of this medicine, was kicking in and my oncologist and I had spoken about it and we said, you know, we're not going to take that chance to go any further, so I stopped at 10. In between all of this happening, I then have well, actually this was a month before I finalized treatment I was getting severe pains in my abdomen and I said something's not right here. Like this is not a normal side effect of chemo. So I took myself to the emergency room. You know, I said, all right, I'll go, no big deal After all of this, taking myself to the emergency room is nothing.
Speaker 3:So I go and they do an ultrasound. I'm like, oh yeah, you have gallbladder filled with gallstones, it needs to come out, but you have to finish treatment first. So I met with a surgeon, went through all of that, finished my treatment and then I had my gallbladder removed in July, so continuing the crazy year that it was. We did that in July and then I started on my meds, which basically shut down my ovaries because the cancer was estrogen positive. So I have to go once a month for a lovely injection in my stomach that I have a bruise. Actually from this last one. The needle is pretty thick because they inject it's like a pod and it kind of just releases throughout the month. So it's once a month I have to go for this, and then I'm on daily medication as well just to make sure that I have zero estrogen in my body, and with that comes a whole slew of side effects.
Speaker 3:I look at something and I gain five pounds. I'm not doing anything. I mean, it's not like I'm sitting on the couch eating bonbons all night, I am literally. I just look at something and I gain weight. I'm like this is just out of control. I have ridiculous pain A lot of days, like I get out of bed and my feet are killing me. It's like I have plantar fasciitis and my doctor was like, yeah, that's one of the side effects with no estrogen. So now I've added collagen to my supplements that I take every day on top of so many other things, and then I go every four months for a CT scan. They just check my lungs because I had two tiny, tiny nodules prior to starting treatment. We're just keeping an eye on it, nothing to worry about. And in the report comes up that I have calcifications now in my aorta and my I forgot not the pulmonary, whatever. There's another major artery. I can't think of it now. I have brain fog another lovely side effect, just add to the list. So now I have to add a cardiologist to my repertoire.
Speaker 3:So you know, it's been, it's been trying at times. Just, you know, constantly going through and it's like, okay, when is enough going to be enough? Like I'm kind of done with this. But it's the gift that keeps on giving and people say, you know you're done with treatment. Yes, this is great, now you can go. You know, live your life. And yes, I can and I'm trying to.
Speaker 3:But there's also it's not over and it's not going to be over because you know I have to be on these meds for five years. So what happens after five years? Do I just suddenly I don't need to be on them anymore? Like there's so many unknowns that I don't want to make myself crazy and anxious thinking about the what ifs. So I'm just kind of going with the. Let me just take it one day at a time. So we'll cross that five-year bridge when we get to it and we'll see what happens at that point, but for now, I'm doing what I need to do and I'm enjoying life, and the beautiful part about all of this is with your. If it's not a F, yes, it's a hells no.
Speaker 3:Yes yes, so I am doing a lot of hells? No, because if it doesn't serve me, if it doesn't make me happy, if I feel obligated, I'm not doing it I love everything about that I'm not doing it because I have too much on my plate with my kids and their activities and all of that stuff.
Speaker 3:And you know, if I don't, it's not that I don't love that person or like that person, say, if I get invited to an event, but if it's something where I'm going to be you know traveling and stressed and all that stuff, and I just am not feeling it, because there are days when I just don't feel it Like I just want to stay in my pajamas all day and hang out at home with my kids and that's it, and that you know what. I used to feel guilty about that, but I don't anymore because I am trying to take care of myself and I'm gonna have these days where the side effects of the medication are gonna make me feel shitty and I'm not gonna wanna go out and I'm not gonna wanna do this, that or the other thing, and that is okay and I'm completely fine with that. It took me a while to get there. Even when I was going through chemo I felt like okay, all right, I'm feeling okay today, so I have to get all of this in.
Speaker 3:No, you don't. No, you don't. There's no set thing saying okay, if you feel so good on this day, you are now obligated to do a, b and c. Nope, not doing that. I really hope that, like that's heard loud and clear.
Speaker 2:Like I mean and honestly, like you don't even have to go through the year that you went through to develop that mindset right, like all women should be developing a mindset of, if it's not serving me right now, like I'm not going to continue to sacrifice myself, sacrifice the way I feel, push myself to do something that I don't want to do for someone else because I have to prioritize me and my family. And like that is such a huge. Like I mean, it took us a really long time. Like it took me, it took me a really long time to get there. But like I also think that letting go of that that doesn't need to be paired with guilt and remorse and you know I'm sorry, no right.
Speaker 1:Like standing tall, think about when you did show up to those things, how positive you were and how grateful you were to be in that moment and be present, and I think that that once you experience feeling there's no going back to living a life where you have to do things out of obligation Right. Like you know, I was. I saw you, you know, at a couple of different events across you know this year and, just being able to, I was so like I admire you because, like you were strong, you showed up happy, you were actually like the light of the party, like you were there, like you were dancing, you were smiling, you were loving on the people that were there for you and that's a beautiful feeling. And so what do you think was like the biggest thing in your life that helped you stay? Because on that video you were positive. You came here, you sat here, you were like I'm going to do it. I don't know what I'm doing.
Speaker 3:I just know I'm here.
Speaker 1:There's a reason behind it and I didn't watch you, as you know. I've talked to her and I, you know and it's it's so different but, like I, I'm a positive person, so I know reasons why I show up in a positive way at times that I don't want to. But I couldn't imagine going through what you were going through and for Nicole like to go through what she was going going through, and then you have two little girls and a husband to go home to like. I know my first resort was always to like curl up and cry and like hide and isolate, and you never did that. And even you know, when you had your hair loss, you sent this beautiful like video of you with the hair and then you were like, oh, after hair I'm not wearing it.
Speaker 1:You showed up with with no hair and your eyebrows look better than mine. It does. I'm sitting here with two feet. They do look. I did them myself today. You guys didn't even notice how you did and didn't say anything.
Speaker 3:But anyway so.
Speaker 1:I'll post a picture later.
Speaker 3:I think they look just fine.
Speaker 1:I used a stencil.
Speaker 3:That's great.
Speaker 1:Stencils just fine. I used a stencil. That's great. Stencils are good. Hey, listen, we're a disaster. Yeah, a little. A little background story. I had one day, um Kim painted my eyebrows with a pencil. It looked like the joker yes, but anyway.
Speaker 1:so, like I, I just always admired that ability to be able to go through what you were going through, and you were always so positive and even when you showed up on social media, you showed up on social media in that manner. There wasn't fakeness, there was this is what I'm going through. I'm going to go, I'm going to do it and I'm going to do it happy Like. Or I'm going to do it on the shitty days and I'm going to do it on the happy days.
Speaker 3:But what do you think was that? And have a smile on your face and you know, there were days when I didn't have smiles on my face and that was fine too, but I just feel like it was one of those, a Situation that I don't wish on anybody, but I had to go through it. So I, in my mind, if I was to start that on a negative foot, where woe is me, why me, I can't do this I wouldn't have been able to do it. It's mindset 100%. It is 100%. What you put in your mind is what you're going to show out to the world. So I was going into it. All right, I know I'm going to have my bad days and I'm going to have my good days, but I'm always going to try to stay positive about this because if not, I'm going to crawl up into that ball and be in the corner and I can't have that. I can't do that because I have two girls who are looking up to me and they're going to be like, well, you know how's mom doing? Oh, she's crying in the corner a lot. You know, I couldn't, I didn't want that to be.
Speaker 3:What was, you know what was in their heads. I wanted to show them that life is going to throw you curveballs and it's going to be very, very hard at times, very hard, sometimes harder than others, but you get back up. You get knocked down, you get back up and you keep going. And so I think that was always in the back of my mind. And then I had the most amazing support system. I hated Mondays, but I love them just the same, because Nicole would come and get me, we would go up the sprain, we'd have our little coffee and conversation, I mean anybody got Nicole up that early in the morning and sorry, and driving in the snow, in the rain, like I mean, there was no question that she does not love you but, I mean, oh my goodness, I don't drive anywhere like my number one thing.
Speaker 2:If I ever went a lot, it was I want a driver. Yes, but, as I agree, as much as I hated seeing Monday is as much as I looked forward to Monday right and partially it was your positivity. It was just and and we also brought a little love and light to the unit, like they needed a little.
Speaker 2:They need a little love and light in there. I'm sure you guys like I think that we I think at that moment, I think me as a friend and you as a person in it like we needed that time together to just be. Like it doesn't matter what we say, it doesn't matter what goes on here, we're together, we're getting through this, we're going to be on the other side of this. Nothing mattered, right, like we're just doing, we're checking the boxes on a Monday and like I think the more we check the boxes on a Monday together, the more strength we felt that we were going to be on the other side of it together. Right, and like Monday, okay, done.
Speaker 3:And like okay.
Speaker 2:Monday okay, done Right. And like we got stronger and stronger. I want to say you started out like most people feel, like okay, well, you're starting a chemo, you know regimen. You're gonna start out really strong and then towards the end, you're just gonna be beaten down. I I. It's the opposite.
Speaker 2:Like I saw a woman who started out strong but you ended up fucking stronger, like like so much stronger. Like you weren't beaten down by the process. You weren't you know miserable about the process, you weren't, you know, just empty. You were full of life at the end. And that is what your daughters experienced for a year. And like you've given them such a gift for a year of seeing a woman who is rising through something that takes a lot of people down, and like when we finally realized I was like, oh my god, it's a year like, and what you went through in a year, I mean the loss of such a beautiful man and your dad and and and and surgery again for gallstones and complications will leave off the conversation here, but like most people would have been drained and empty, but you came out like a rainbow, happening, like that's what your daughters learned.
Speaker 2:Those are gifts that we can only pray we give our children that they can see how to handle the worst of life right and like that to me is like such a it's I don't want to say, oh my gosh, like it's a gift that you know you went through this, but what the legacy that you gave them is.
Speaker 1:There's nothing that those two girls can't do yeah, I think when you, when I hear you talk in that video, when you first sat here and you said, like I don't know why this is happening, but I'm gonna go through it, and I think about some things that you shared with me on the days that you were feeling well, you already designed what that week was going to look like for yourself, when it was good week and you prioritize your family, you prioritize your friends and, more importantly, it's, like Nicole said, like your daughters watch that. And it wasn't just about okay, we're going to go to the beach. It's like no, we're going to go to the beach and we're going to live in the moment. And they got the best part of you that day. And those are the moments that your daughters are going to remember, because when life hits them, they're going to know like I got to pick up and I got to keep going and I got to. That's so beautiful, oh, thank you.
Speaker 2:Really it's crazy. All right, so for the listeners or anybody that may be going through the process, what are like your, some of your little tips and tricks that you built through the thing that made you like, okay, you really should do this if you're going through it, biggie and Nicole yeah. Like. What are some of your like? Did you find any products that you love? Did you find any? You know things to listen to, books, to read. Did you find anything that you're like? This is part of the secret sauce.
Speaker 3:So I don't know if it's so much secret sauce, but things that helped me personally get through it were I found a way to kind of research new products, right, like new facial products, because in researching there's so many chemicals and toxic things in our face creams, our face washes, all of that stuff and that they're all endocrine disruptors and that was cancer. Like, my cancer wasn't hereditary, so it's environmental, which means that the food that we eat, the things that we ingest, the things that we put on our skin, totally, you know, off the table. So it's been fun, in a way, kind of trying these new products where I'll go to Sephora and spend $300. Whoops.
Speaker 2:It's for health reasons, Exactly. There's no arguing that at all. I mean I'll go to bat for that.
Speaker 3:I mean, I'm just saying you know what I haven't really spent money on myself, so it's a big deal. But you know, just trying out new products, which is kind of cool, and you know, doing all of that, I make my skincare now a priority. I mean, I kind of did and, and you know, doing all of that, I make my skincare now a priority I mean, I kind of did before, but not I thought you were about to say like you're actually creating your
Speaker 2:own skincare. Oh, no, no, no, I mean, hey, we don't have time for that we don't know what the future brings.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah, yeah, um, but no, just you know, trying out new products like that, and then, now that my hair is growing, back in trying new products for that, you know it's funny. So I have um testing out just new products and serums and stuff like that that help with growth. I also go now for a monthly. I don't know if you've seen them on instagram. They're going viral. But those um those like head massage places they?
Speaker 1:Oh, yes, they do. I went to one. Oh my goodness, it was amazing.
Speaker 2:I'm so jealous because I can't go because of my extensions. No, you can.
Speaker 1:You just got to go on a day before you move up and then you wrap the top part. I don't have a move up, I just it's just one for me. They use that brush that, yes, oh my goodness you. You literally feel like putty. So there's things that I'm now incorporating. That's a self love tip right there. You have to self love. It's reasonably priced.
Speaker 3:I figure I'm saving money going every four weeks to get my hair dyed, my roots touched up or whatever, because I'm not doing that now so I'm putting it into a head massage to make feel like putty when I'm done. I'm definitely making more of a.
Speaker 3:I guess that's what I'm looking for again brain fog, sorry, um, I'm I'm trying to make it where I have things that are just for me that I look forward to you know, because I feel like I'm constantly, you know, making sure the kids have this, that and the other thing, and you know rushing, traveling to work, traveling back from work, getting dinner on the table, making sure everything's done. But there are non-negotiables for me, and my husband knows that. You know, kim gets her nails done every three weeks. Mommy's got her time.
Speaker 2:Let's talk about the nails right now. You're Yankee. Yes, I got my Yankee nails. They better win tonight. They better win tonight, oh man.
Speaker 3:Or else I'm not going to have a happy household.
Speaker 2:I'm sorry it's a Met house at my house.
Speaker 3:I know it's rough, I mean it's still sportsmanship, of course.
Speaker 1:They're still New York. Aj was telling me that his whole youth group in school guys were on. They're all Met fans and nobody's rooting for the Mets and I'm like I don't get that. That's poor sportsmanship.
Speaker 2:It's a New York team. Terrence is very much a Met fan and he's watching the games.
Speaker 1:But is he cheering the Yankees on? No, that's what I'm saying.
Speaker 3:He's not cheering any of them, but he wouldn't be cheering the Dodgers on either. He's not cheering anyone on.
Speaker 2:But I on either. Yeah, he's not cheering anyone on, but I think he appreciates good baseball. Like I'm not gonna lie, even I don't really, I'm not really a baseball fan. I mean, my daughter plays softball. But like the other night when he was such a grand slam.
Speaker 2:I mean, I don't know his name and I don't know what went on, but I did see it happen and, like we both stood up, well I was. I was like, wow, that was really amazing. But think about, like that guy, what the heck is this? Can I get a name, rob? You got a name Farrell, the Dodger guy that won the game the first game.
Speaker 1:Oh god, freeman.
Speaker 2:Okay, but like Terrence and I see Farrell, terrence and I were just talking about, like the feeling, the totally off topic, but the feeling that he must have had from a little kid, I was crying on my couch from a little. You hit that winning run right like imagine, for like that's probably a dream, like he had forever right and a feeling he'll never forget, ever like, and that was like like.
Speaker 2:So I think that, whether you're rooting for the mets or the yankees or whatever, like to appreciate good, a good game, a good a sport, like that's what how terrence watches it, like right now, because he doesn't like the yankees and the dodgers equally. Um, so he, he is watching it, it's watching this sport it's a sport and it the games have been incredible so far they really have, whether no matter who what fan you are um, but kim does have her and I have my yankee and I am with it representing Steve.
Speaker 3:Yep, I said, watch this be the year that they make the World Series, and you know my dad's probably cheering them on up there.
Speaker 2:Biggest Yankee fan I know oh my God, crazy, crazy Yankee fan. Yeah.
Speaker 3:Yeah, so that's kind of fun. That made me smile when they got to the World. Series I was like they're doing this for you, dad.
Speaker 1:That's for. Steve this for you, dad, that's for you, that's for steve. So I got a question for you, because when um we saw it was your one year, you put up a post and you were giving lots of love. But then you also said um, yeah, if you block me, it's totally okay, I'm still showing up, didn't we block?
Speaker 3:you? No, but I don't think so. I don't think so. There should be an alert right like you've been blocked.
Speaker 1:So I would love that. I went to the supermarket a few, a few weeks ago. I told nicole and, um, this lady was there. And I went up and I said, oh my goodness, hi, how are you? I've known her like since aj and the kids were little. And she, um, we started chatting. I'm like, do you have social media? And she's like, yeah. So I pull her up on my phone and I can't find her. And then I'm like, did you block me? She's like, oh, I don't know how to do that. So I'm like, well, give me your phone. And then I went in her phone, went into settings when she had me. So, nicole and I get that a lot, where people just kind of like snooze us or block us.
Speaker 3:But I think that you, showing up in the light that you are, you just don't stop well, thank you, I mean I, I just don't know how people are going to receive it, doesn't, you't matter?
Speaker 2:You know some people Exactly, and it doesn't really. That sounds like a them problem.
Speaker 3:It doesn't matter to me, it really doesn't. I'm not going to lose sleep over it. So I just said that, if you know, if you want to, you don't want to hear my rant, you don't want to hear about this, that's fine, go ahead. Had commented. I got so many positive responses on that post and it was really beautiful. Um, you know, just to keep going and keep doing what I'm doing and anybody who would block me as an asshole and you know I mean whatever- the world wouldn't function if we didn't have assholes so it's fine how would we
Speaker 2:learn how to be tolerant if there weren't assholes.
Speaker 3:This is true, just the way it is but yeah, so I don't think anybody has blocked me. If they did whatever, I mean, it's again no skin off my teeth.
Speaker 2:If you don't have any haters, you're not doing it right.
Speaker 1:No, I think your message and your story is so beautiful and I think the friendship that you guys had is so beautiful because in some cases where I've known people that have gone through something like that, they isolate and they don't even lean in onto the closest people to them. It's true.
Speaker 3:Yeah, it's true. I don't know how anybody would get through this without a support system.
Speaker 1:I think from what I heard from somebody is they don't want to be a burden.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and I think that or they don't want to see. You know the burden of going through that pain and going through you know this, the fear, right. But I think that you didn't allow that from the beginning and I mean she would never let you anyway. But I think that your support system and knowing that you have two little girls that need the best of you, no matter what, you fought through that and that's a beautiful story and a beautiful way to get people to understand that they need that community.
Speaker 2:So what do you think is the future for you for advocating for, for this besides product, which I? I mean, I can see a kim product line. Didn't we come up with? Oh, we came up. Yeah, we came up with a book for her. I did.
Speaker 1:I called her when we left here and I was like I just want to let you know you're writing a book the daily affirmation yes so that's the first step.
Speaker 3:We're definitely gonna have a. Yes, I have to really sit down and and and do that. Um, you know it's funny because I always thought about having a blog or something like that.
Speaker 1:It was always in the back of my mind no, you need like a youtube channel, because people need to hear you and see you.
Speaker 3:and it was funny because a couple years ago I went to a psychic medium and she had said to me she goes, I kind of see you in a blog, like a funny kind of light, take on things that are serious. And it was funny because I had that. I had those notes from that session and I just saw them recently and I said, oh my God, how funny is that that it just saw them recently. And I said, oh my god, how funny is that that it just happens.
Speaker 3:You know, happens to be, so that is definitely on my list of things to do. I really have to just sit down and put the pen to paper and you have to look at it as part of your self-care right?
Speaker 2:you know this. You having this voice is for you. It's part of a self-care regimen. It's that time for you to quiet yourself and be in the moment and reflect, and you know it's part of a self-care regimen. It's that time for you to quiet yourself and be in the moment and reflect, and you know that's how I feel. When I'm writing something or I'm whatever I'm doing like to advocate for something, I have to first look inward and I have to have, and it's time for me. You know that would be a cathartic experience for you and you know other people will benefit from that because it is inspirational. You know, you and I talked a lot about it when we were in that chemo session. Like, what do women need when they're sitting here? They need more than these words on the wall.
Speaker 2:Like they need someone who's breathing life into them. They need someone who's excited. You know, like you're on the other side of today, like, let's get excited. Like you, you are that voice for those women who need to read a column or a blog or hear a video of you saying like today's not the day we're going down, like today's the day we're getting up.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you know, like big girl panties on girls and showing how are you going to live the next five years. Where you know that fear is some people would stay stuck in that fear, like you're not allowing yourself to be there.
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 1:Like you're going to continue to live your life. You're going to continue to pour into yourself, pour into other people, and that's what people need to hear. People need to see somebody doing it, so that you know, if they're in a situation like that, they get to say, no, today's not the freaking day. Like I'm going to go listen to Kim and this is what I'm doing, doing what she's doing, because that five years is a long time and you're going to be preparing yourself for that moment, to face whatever it is in the next five years as well.
Speaker 3:Yeah, it's funny you say that. You, yeah, it's funny you say that because there was. You know, it was kind of a weird feeling when I was done with treatment. I was excited because I was done, right, you know, this is all behind me. But then it's also very scary because you're at the point where, all right, so I had all of these things pumped into me to keep me, you know, safe and whatever. Now I'm on my own in a sense, right. So it kind of it kind of gave me a little bit of fear, but not to the point where I'm going to let it, you know, tackle me and take me down. It was just, you know, it's in the back of my mind and I do. I'm not going to stop living my life. You know what I mean. I'm going to make my little changes and some people go extreme, but I feel like I'm going to still do the things that make me happy. You know what I mean, like I'm going to.
Speaker 3:They say don't use perfumes, don't you this? Well, there's a perfume that I really like and I like to smell good. So if I'm going to use that, I'm going to use it. I'm not going to stop. I'm not going to stop living my life you know what I mean and take that tiny percent chance that the cancer might come back. I mean I'm doing everything I can here. I'm having a shot, I'm having a daily thing, I'm taking supplements. You know I'm doing what I can. I also actually just did this the other day. I put myself on a volunteer list for the cancer center at Phelps where I had my treatment, for the cancer center at Phelps where I had my treatment. So I had gone the other day and I said to the nurses I said Nicole would love this. They brought around a pumpkin and all the patients would draw on the pumpkin whatever they were feeling. It was like the pumpkin of feelings they called it right.
Speaker 3:So they had markers and everything, so I drew a beautiful flower. I mean, I'm a terrible drawer, but it was as pretty as could be.
Speaker 2:I was gonna say how beautiful was this flower.
Speaker 3:And it said smile. So I wanna bring that to those people in that center. So I mean, I don't know if they're gonna pick me, but I hope they do, because I would like to give back. I would like to give back, I would like to you know like we were talking about it being there and it's just. You know, the only people you heard laughing were me, nicole and my nurses. Otherwise it was like dead silence in there. Yeah, you know, and people need a little bit of lightness and laughter. You're going through some heavy shit what did they?
Speaker 1:how did they pick? They pick from like a lottery or something. Um, nicole's gonna call this.
Speaker 3:Well, I did put nicole as one of my references so it was basically just filling out an application and just stating what part you want to do. Why do you want to do it? Um, you know what? What have you been through that you feel like you could contribute to being a volunteer? Let them call me for a while, so it said. You know somebody will get back to you, so I'm hoping they do you know I would.
Speaker 1:Nicole is not a woman, let them call me, like you're, a proactive woman. Nicole is putting this on her list to do. You know, when you said you have so much to do and you don't know where to start, right here well, I think that I I mean first of all I would think about the pumpkin. I'd be like, okay, draw on the pumpkin right, all the the f's that you have right now and now let's go outside and smash the shit out of that pumpkin, um.
Speaker 2:But like I think that volunteering is everything and, coming from where you are, you know exactly what that floor needs and you also know how to listen, to listen. There were, you know, a few people. We walked past that. You know they needed quiet right you know they needed their time, but there were also some people that you walked past and you knew were craving a smile and the 15 minutes of laughing and and you learned how to navigate that so well, like when you needed your nap.
Speaker 3:You needed your nap you needed.
Speaker 2:You didn't need a party like you needed quiet. But when you needed to smile and you needed to needed my nap, you needed you didn't need a party like you needed quiet. But when you needed to smile and you needed to get through the last half hour, we you knew how, you knew you needed that. So I think that you, as a volunteer, can navigate those emotions for people and I think that that just comes from a place of I've done it and I know what I need and you were able to feel that and I think that you bring tremendous value to that, to that you're hired you're hired, you're in um and I think that the any any floor needs more yeah you know it just needs more, and it's it's mindset a lot
Speaker 2:of mindset. You know, and all those people that came to talk to us, nobody really talked about mindset. You know, we talked about we toast, we mindset. You know, and all those people that came to talk to us, nobody really talked about mindset. You know, we talked about we toast we talked about. You know, we talked about hair, we talked about those things, but nobody really came in there like fire you up situation. You know, sometimes you need that in your life to come from this year of what you've been through to what you can still go through, Like you're going to give to so many and probably not even know half of it. But you know, whether it's a blog, whether it's a book, whether it's, you know, like your experience is going to give back tenfold. I just know it. It's just the way it has to be. It's just the way it has to be.
Speaker 3:It's just the way it has to be.
Speaker 2:Alright, so let's close it out with what's one thing you want to say to that woman who's in the thick of it right now.
Speaker 3:You will get through it. You will get through it. You may not feel that in the moment and you may feel like the world is against me. I feel like shit. I don't know how I'm going to get through this. How am I going to do this? You will. You will Keep your mind set or try at least to think of the positives, that this will be over. You're going to live your life. You're going to be okay, that this will be over. You're gonna live your life. You're gonna be okay, and one step at a time, baby steps some days, big leaps other days. It just depends on how you're feeling in that moment.
Speaker 3:But don't give up and don't let that negativity enter your mind, because then you go down a very slippery slope and you don't wanna be in that negative mindset. You need to be strong getting through this and you need strength mentally, physically, emotionally to get to the other side of it, and you will. There were days when I thought this was never ending and then here I was, on 10 of 12 and that was it. It was done. You know, oh my God, it's over. You know and you will get there. It may seem like very far-fetched at times, but you will, and mindset is 100, and I believe this it happened to me, and all the doctors and the nurses have said it also. You're getting through this because of your mindset. You're making it through in such a great way because of your mindset, and so that would be my word of advice Just dial it in and do what you need to do in order to have a positive spin on this.
Speaker 1:Well, I'm pretty sure the last time you were here, you said you were writing your own story. So I think that you started to write your own story and you're going to continue.
Speaker 3:Yes, it's far from over, but you know we will. We will have a happy ending no matter what.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but if you just look at the contrast between the first time you sat here to now you have so much to be proud of, really.
Speaker 3:And that's what that's the legacy you're leaving here and for other, for listeners who are going through it right now.
Speaker 2:So thank you, thank you for having me, thank you, girl, thank you, thank you. And I think my just call to action is that if anyone is listening to this that has a friend going through it, who is going through it, just share it with them, share positivity, share light, share hope, and we just want to thank everybody behind the lid with Kim today. Bye guys, bye guys, bye.
