Get Out Of Your Own Way with Sam DeSalvo

How to Stay Self-Motivated in Your 20s

August 14, 2023 Samantha DeSalvo Season 1 Episode 16
Get Out Of Your Own Way with Sam DeSalvo
How to Stay Self-Motivated in Your 20s
Show Notes Transcript

Hi friends! Today I am bringing you a QUICK episode to listen to whenever you need a lil' pick-me-up. Some strategies + tips I use to get and stay motivated!! 


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#MotivationIn20s, #StayingMotivated, #TwentiesAdulthood, #GoalSetting, #DisciplineAndMotivation, #FriendshipsIn20s, #OvercomingChallenges, #LifeExperiencesIn20s, #ManagingSocialMedia, #DefiningSuccessInYour20s, #BalancingFunAndResponsibility, #SelfReflectionAndMotivation, #NavigatingAdulthood, #AchievingGoalsIn20s, #MotivationMindset, #JourneyOfSelfDiscovery, #StayingFocusedIn20s, #PersonalGrowthAndMotivation, #MotivationAndResponsibility, #FindingDriveInYourTwenties

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Hello, my friends, and welcome back to another episode of the Get Out of Your Own Way podcast. I'm your host, Sam DeSalvo, and I'm so glad you are here today. I'm doing an episode today on how to stay self motivated in your 20s. So you guys voted for this one on Instagram. I was supposed to have a guest last week on my podcast, and she bailed. Literally five minutes before so I had to think on the fly and come up with an episode But you guys were great and you helped me come up with this topic today of how to stay self motivated in your 20s So I'm excited to bring you this episode today Remember you guys can always connect with me on social media at Sam DeSalvo S a m d e s a l v o and if you have any topics you would like to hear about I would love to bring you them But I'm excited to bring you guys this episode today because I feel like this is a topic that kind of comes naturally for me. So I, I always get from people that like, you are so motivated, you're so disciplined, things like that. And I have to be honest with you guys, it's kind of just in my personality. I'm a Capricorn by nature, so that is in our star sign. I know that some people don't believe in that kind of stuff, but that is... One of our traits is that we are just very motivated. We're hard workers. We don't give up easily things like that So naturally, I don't really struggle with this all the time But if you guys have been listening from the beginning, you know that I've been going through like ebbs and flows of this so I definitely Understand how it is hard, and I have been struggling with this in the past couple months. Which, like I said, isn't normal for me because this is something that has always come natural for me. So now to be struggling with motivation and just enthusiasm in life, I guess. Has been an interesting journey for me but I have some tips that have helped me get through it and helped me get to the other side and things that I Just kind of do to keep me going and keep me excited about life. So I hope you guys enjoyed today's episode and Let's jump into it. It is currently BJ day, which this is a Rhode Island only holiday is victory over Japan day so it's a Monday that I'm recording on right now and I chose to take today off, kind of had a really busy weekend, we had a wedding to go to, and then we had an event for some people last night, and I just feel so exhausted, I don't even think I would want to work today if I, if it wasn't a holiday, I just feel my energy levels are so low, and I just needed a day to like, recharge, do things around the house. Clean up, you know put away laundry things like that just went to Target with my mom and I got some hangers cuz I saw a thing on tick tock and it was like if You don't have matching hangers. It's time to grow up and you know, I took that advice. I was like, you know what? It's time for me to grow up and because my closet I don't have any bureaus or anything. I only fit all my clothes into my closet, so I feel like it kind of is, like, nice if it was all organized and it all had perfect hangers. I feel like it would just look elevated. So I went to Target today and I bought a pack of 100 hangers for 45. I don't feel like that was that bad because I was looking at them on Amazon and it was packs of 30 for like 24. I definitely needed way more than 30 hangers. I saw them at Target, picked them up today, I'm gonna work on that project after I record this podcast, but Like I said, it was just such a busy weekend. It was a good weekend, but Busy. I feel tired. My energy levels are super low. I have to play field hockey at 9pm tonight, that's interesting. But Here are some of the things that I do that help me stay motivated in my 20s. And I want to make this like a mini episode, I'm going to try not to ramble too much. I'll make it a quick episode that's just tangible for you guys. You can listen to it quick. And if you need to listen to it multiple times, it's here at your disposal, whatever you need it. But I just feel like being in your 20s is, it's a hard time of your life. I mean, I've never been and in any other part of my life unless it was younger, but I am not in my 30s yet. I'm just saying like this chunk of my life has been extra challenging than others that I've had already. it's just an awkward stage where it's like half of your friends are getting blacked out drunk on the weekends and just living like a different kind of life. And then the other half of your friends are starting to get married and have kids. Like in my hometown, a lot of people have had children already. It's definitely an interesting one to navigate you're like, okay And then also to add on top of that like you have to add in social media who's also saying like oh You should be this person and you should be that person like you should be having fun in your 20s but like don't forget to get your career off the ground and Time to buy a house and you're still living with your parents like oh my gosh So many things are just like you feel as if you need to keep up with so You're just kind of left in this confusing stage of not knowing what you should be doing with your life. And how do you stay sane while you're working a 95 job and you have all these goals and then you, like I said, you see people either in your life or on social media living a whole different life than you and you feel like you're constantly comparing yourself to their lives. And it can definitely be hard. I hope that these tips help you today. And I think the tips The topic of motivation can relate to many areas of your life. that could be work, fitness, relationships, finances. Like you need a sense of motivation to kind of push you through. And I mean it in terms of feeling like energized about life. Like you're excited to get up in the morning. You feel passionate. Like we've all felt that thing before. That's like, I love doing this. I could get lost in doing this and I just want to bring you guys some tips today of what are some ways that you can kind of get that passion going again and how you can be motivated about life and how you could be motivated in these different areas of your life. the thing with motivation is it kind of stems off of a place of how we think of ourselves, how much we respect ourselves. We show up to a job every single day if that's what we do or we make plans with other people and we show up because we respect them and we don't just bail last minute on these things because we don't want to let that person down or we respect our boss enough in our jobs. To not just bail last minute and the thing is with ourselves is we will let ourselves down easily it's like we respect others more than we respect ourselves Because if we did respect ourselves and hold us ourselves to a high level Then we would not bail on ourselves or not do the things that we say we're gonna do So if we make a plan that we are gonna work out every single day And then tomorrow you're like, I'm so tired. I can't go and do that. It's as if you're like telling yourself that like, okay, like, I don't trust myself. I'm, I'm not motivated and I don't respect myself. And that's a narrative you're creating in your head where we need to switch those gears to make sure that we are respecting ourselves and we Consider ourselves just as much as we consider everything else in our lives and the respect that we give to everything else in our lives. Because I know that I'm not talking in this, I'm not talking about this topic of respect in today's episode. But it kind of does go hand in hand with how much you value yourself. Motivation will stem from that because we need to hold ourselves to a higher standard and we need to think that we are worthy of all the things that we want and that we chase after those things. I think they go hand in hand with each other. You need to value yourself and know your worth and then motivation will follow it. I'm going to run through some points with you guys of just different things that can help you be motivated, stay motivated, and help you get back to being motivated. the first one is think of your why. I want you to think of your big why, not just a generic I want to lose 50 pounds. That's a great starting point, but it needs to even be more internalized than that. As in, why do you want to lose those 50 pounds? There has to be a bigger reason. It can be a vanity standpoint. I want to look pretty and that is totally fine. I hate when people think like you can't think from that perspective because you absolutely can. And I think if you started because you want to look pretty, you'll also realize like, wow, I feel so much better. Now that I have this extra weight off my body, I feel so much better. And that's okay. if that's a place that it stems from, that you want to lose weight to look better. And then you feel better that that's another piece that'll come with it. But like I said, you need to think of your big why. if you want a job that is work from home, That's a great starting point, but what's the bigger why? I want more time to be at home with my dog. I want more time to be at home and be with my kids. try to think of your bigger why, and that's something that you'll always be able to come back to when you're not feeling motivated. And I would even encourage you to write this down in a journal, make a vision board out of it, make it your phone background, whatever your big why is. Make sure it runs deep enough that it's something that you don't want to give up on, and then just like plaster it everywhere. Make it your personality. Make it who you are and who you are striving to be. And then along with this point, I think something that's really important with motivation is who you surround yourself with. we all have heard that saying that you are the five people that are in your life. You are made up of the five people that are in your life. we take on everyone's characteristics around us and I think it's important to have people in your life that you look up to and you admire, and they are a little bit more ahead of you in life in certain areas, that you can go to them for advice. And they've been through certain situations that you are going through, they can kind of help you through those things. But just some people that are better in areas, whether that be socially, mentally physically if they're in a job that you'd want to be doing one day things like that Relationships, I think it's important to have people that are a little bit further in relationships And are in healthy versions of themselves So the people that you surround yourself with are going to definitely either motivate you or bring you down if you're with people That you're trying to be healthy and you want to live a different life But these people go out to different bars every single weekend. Just eat trash food. They don't work out That is not going to help you and is not going to be motivating to you because you're gonna think like well They do it and I should be able to do it too, or I don't want to lose my friends I'm just gonna go and do these things that I've always done. it's really important to find people that You look up to, and you admire, and you connect with, and that motivate you and push you to be a better version of yourself. And moving right along, another thing that I think is really big for me, personally, is Motivation is not always going to be there. Motivation is fleeting. It's the ebbs and flows in life. Like I just said that I'm kind of in a season right now in my life that it has been really like ebbing and flowing that like sometimes I'm very motivated but then other times I'm just not and I think that's important because I'm able to bring you guys these topics of what I'm doing to be motivated but motivation will not always be there but what will be there is discipline. you need to be a disciplined person over motivation and This kind of goes back to my first point of when I said you need to respect yourself and do the things that you say you're going to do. That's discipline. not backing down on what the things, what are the things that you have set your mind out to do. And discipline will bring motivation. I'm going to keep using the example of losing weight. Because I think it's a great example of when you need motivation. If you are disciplined and you do the things that you know you need to do to lose weight, you will start shedding that weight. And you look in the mirror or you see the number on the scale and it starts going down. Now you're getting motivated because you're like, wow, this is awesome. Like, and like I said before, you start to feel better. You're like, wow, like everything kind of starts to work with each other. And now you have more motivation because you're starting to see the results from the discipline that you put in. And I just love this story that I heard before of let's picture that we got to heaven, we did our time on this earth, we lived out our entire life, you got to look at like a preview of what your life could have been if you lived up to your entire potential. if you did all the things that you know you were, you needed to do, you were disciplined enough to do the things that you needed to do, and you got to see that version of yourself, and then you had to compare what your life was to the version of if you did live to your highest potential and you were disciplined in all the things that you should have been disciplined in, like, are those. Previews or those replays of your life. Are they gonna match each other? Are they gonna be completely different? Like I don't know I heard that like a couple years ago, honestly And it has stuck with me so much cuz I'm like dang like could you imagine how much that would suck? Could you imagine? If you could have had this beautiful life, you could have lived so healthy, and had healthy relationships, and you know, you had good financial structure in your life, things like that, if you lived up to the discipline that you needed to in your life, you lived up to that potential, because like I said, motivation is going to be fleeting, but discipline will always be there, whether that means you make a A plan for your life, you make goals. You need to figure out what discipline looks like for you. If saying to yourself, I'm going to do this isn't enough, you need to take it one step further than that. Write it down. Give yourself a reward system. Like, find out what kind of positive reinforcement works for you. And then start implementing those into your life. like for me, for example, I'm a big planner. If I like plan my week out, plan my workouts out, I am setting myself up for success. Like if I were to do a training program, that is elite for me because I work really well. If someone tells me here's the steps you need to do to get like the result that you need, I can understand that and I can trust the plan. But if we are going just with our own emotions and behaviors, I just. Don't think for me personally, that's enough because like I said, motivation is fleeting and our human desires are going to want to take over. figure out what discipline looks like for you. Maybe that's having an accountability partner and someone to hold you to those standards. I have accountability in other areas of my life that aren't in fitness, even though I've had fitness Trainers before and coaches and that's one kind of accountability, but also different kind of accountability in your life relationships Business those are different areas that you know, you may need accountability in And I hope this advice isn't like too harsh or I'm coming out too blunt, but like I said, I wanted to just make this a mini episode that you guys could take these tools and apply them to your life where needed and you can keep going. So moving right along. To the next point that I have is to get off of social media when you are starting to feel Less motivated and you're starting to feel like you're comparing your life to everyone else's around you and on social media it's time to take a break and unplug because Social media can be a double edged sword. It can motivate you. Sometimes when I go on tiktok, I feel so motivated I'm ready to do the 75 day hard i'm ready to Like reorganize my closet. I literally just told you guys how I bought new hangers because someone on tiktok told me I needed to So there are times in your life that it can be really motivating and inspiring but then there are other times where If you kind of fall down like a rabbit hole, you're already feeling a little more insecure in your life Or you're not feeling enough right now Maybe social media is not the place for you. Maybe go on pinterest or something where it's like a little bit different And For me, personally, I had to delete Facebook off my phone. And I feel like Facebook is such a grandma app, but it was where my entire hub of people that I always knew were on. And I could see everybody getting engaged and getting pregnant and having kids and getting this job. Like, it's everybody's highlight reel. for me, personally, Facebook was the one that had to go. And then, Even when I'm feeling, like, a little overwhelmed or if I'm not feeling enough, I know it's time to unplug. Maybe just go out for a nice hike, like a day long hike, or spending time with my family. Like, those are things that help recharge and also Of course, like, for me, is my faith, like, spending time with God. I'll put, like, worship on the TV, and I'll just sit there and worship if I'm feeling anxious, or I'm not feeling worthy enough, like, For us believers, we put our worth in God. God tells us who we are. We always look for who God says I am, and not for what the world says I am. I feel like social media can just, it can really disrupt the journey that you have for yourselves because we all have different journeys and they're all gonna look different and it doesn't mean the person who's partying in their 20s is wrong. And it doesn't mean the person who is having kids in their 20s or their young 20s is wrong. Like we are all different and we are all just kind of navigating through this life differently, but that's okay. the problem with social media is that we will fall into rabbit holes that we should be at a certain point where there is no timeline that is right or wrong. There's no playbook for saying you should have done this at a certain age. for me, when I start feeling, like I said, anxious and overwhelmed and I'm kind of comparing myself to others of what I should be doing. I know it's time for me to unplug And do the things that I had just mentioned those are super important for me And then let's just remind ourselves too guys. Like we are only in our 20s though, like seriously It's okay that we don't have everything figured out right now. Like everything is gonna happen in its right timing and let's be honest, who actually has all their crap together? We're experiencing life. We're experiencing adulthood and that's the beauty of it. This is our time to learn lessons and learn about ourselves and what makes us, us. I am just here to tell you guys that you are exactly where you are supposed to be right now and everything is going to work out for you. And I just feel like that's a little reminder that I need to give you guys because I think the topic of motivation can stem from us. Thinking that we should have all these other things on our plates and that we are just overwhelming ourselves with the pressures of Society in this world. just to recap guys Remember your why pick a big why Surround yourself with good people Discipline over motivation always, and with that, find out what discipline looks like for you. Because that might be accountability partners, it might be writing down goals, it might be having a reward system, like, everyone's going to be different in that category. Remember the comparison when you get to heaven, and you look at what your life could have been versus what it was. because you didn't live up to your potential. So just keep that in mind that you want to meet, you want to be twins with your highest self and then get off of social media. If you are feeling less motivated, check in with yourself and check in if it's something that If it's because you're comparing yourself to where others are on social media or other people that you may have known in high school. And a last point is listen to podcasts. Listen to podcasts like this that just try to remind yourself that you are growing and you're heading in the right direction and you're doing great. Stop being so hard on yourself. And the reason that we get to experience Good times and the times that we're motivated is because of the bad times. if you're in a slump right now, you're gonna get out of it. You're gonna find your passion. Keep going. In your 20s, you are going to learn so much. The good, the bad, the crazy. Just try to be motivated through it all and be disciplined through it all. You have so much time to worry about being a fully responsible and successful adult throughout your life. Right now you just need to give yourself a break, have some fun, and find out what it means for you to be motivated along the way. And I'm going to stop this episode here and I can dive into some of the other topics that I talked about today. So like discipline and surrounding yourself with good people, getting off of social media, like, and like unplugging from social media. If you guys want me to talk about those. Or a bit odd. And if you want to see the full episode I would be happy to do that. Remember you guys can follow me on social media at Sam Dasao, on tiktok I post these episodes every single week. We are on episode sixteen, guys and I've been doing this for 16 weeks now! How crazy is that? And please be sure to share this episode with someone who might find it helpful. You never know. You really never know who you could be helping by sharing an episode or or timingvidioitus... Get in front of potentially so I really hope you guys enjoyed this and you can take something from this And I will talk to you guys next time Bye