Welcome Home - A Podcast for Veterans, About Veterans, By Veterans
Welcome Home is a Willing Warriors and the Warrior Retreat at Bull Run project. The program highlights activities at the Warrior Retreat and issues impacting all Veterans. For questions or feedback, please email us at podcast@willingwarriors.org.
Welcome Home - A Podcast for Veterans, About Veterans, By Veterans
Defending Our Hidden Heroes: Colonel Schaffer's Mission to Protect Military Children
Colonel Adrienne L. Schaffer Esq., a retired Army JAG officer with over 33 years of service, reveals the often-overlooked struggles of military children and the powerful work of the Military Children's Six Foundation. As founder and CEO, she champions a mission of leadership development and advocacy for these "hidden heroes" who sacrifice alongside their parents.
Military children face extraordinary challenges - constant relocation, disrupted education, absent parents, and sometimes stepping into caregiver roles when a parent returns injured. Col. Schaffer explains how these experiences can leave children feeling isolated and unsure of their identity. Her foundation provides crucial tools for self-advocacy and leadership, guided by a powerful mission: "It's our duty to stand up and protect and defend our children while their parents are away protecting and defending us."
The foundation's approach is particularly timely considering alarming statistics about mental health struggles among military families. Their programs build resilience by focusing on leadership development, advocacy skills, and community connection. Through initiatives like their "Unbreakable Crowns" program, they celebrate children who overcome significant hardships, recognizing their ability to rise "through the ashes of life" and emerge victorious.
Join us to learn about the upcoming Military Children's World Expo on April 26th at Pentagon City Mall - a day-long celebration featuring talent showcases, educational symposiums, and critical resources for military families. Whether your family is currently serving, you're a veteran with children, or you simply want to support these remarkable young people, this conversation will inspire you to take action. Visit their web page to learn more and donate to this vital mission supporting the children who sacrifice for our freedom.
Good morning. I'm your host, larry Ziliak, director of Culinary Services here at the Warrior Retreat at Bull Run. Today, joining us is John Wall, our co-host, which you're all familiar with, and our guest today is Colonel Adrienne Schaefer. She's a retired attorney, jag Army, jag Army and we're so excited to have her because she is the founder and CEO of the Military Children's Sixth Foundation. We really wanted to get her on because there's a big event coming up on April 26th for the month of the military child. There's a World Expo that's going to be held at Pentagon City Mall and I wanted to ask her to come and join us for an episode so she can fill us in all about that. We can learn more about the organization. So, colonel, welcome to the podcast.
Col. Schaffer:Thank you for having me.
Larry Zilliox:John, you had just commented on the organization's logo. What caught your eye about that?
John Wall:Well, thanks, good morning to you all as well, and it's a pleasure to have you here, colonel, and I'm looking forward to learning more about the Military Children's Six Foundation. I actually never heard of it, so I'm very interested in understanding it. Real brief, just looking over the business card she had just presented to us and I saw the shield on there and it just an amazing way of designing a shield. It's simple, but it's. It gets the point across and then it also has, you know, the america flag interweaved into that and it's just. It's just a really I don't know, it's just really nice looking. I just really liked it, something that I it just kind of reminds me of, like maybe the shield of the captain America, but a little bit different, you know to protect the protect.
John Wall:Yeah, absolutely yeah.
Larry Zilliox:So, colonel, tell us about the organization and what it does. I mean you get a sense that it's protecting children, which is fantastic, and especially military children, which we adopt a Dole Foundation definition of children being hidden heroes and we know when the warriors come out from the hospitals and stay with us. We see the toll that it takes on the family, and we know that these children are either stepping up into caregiver roles a pseudo caregiver role in some cases but also to their entire life is disrupted because of what happened to mom or dad, and so they are very special to us, and to have your organization dedicated to them, I think, is just phenomenal.
Col. Schaffer:Thank you. So it was really interesting that you noted the shield on the card and the purpose of that shield. We look at ourselves as the protectors and the defenders of our military children. Defenders of our military children, Guardians of the ward. And where that really comes from is a Bible verse, and it's Psalm 90, verse 16. And it says let thy work appear unto thy servant and thy glory unto their children.
John Wall:Extension it's our duty to stand up and protect and defend our children while their parents are away protecting and defending us. There you go. That's the right there. She pretty much nailed what I was thinking and it's interesting it goes back to you know what the Bible said? That was in Psalms, correct?
Col. Schaffer:Yes.
John Wall:Yeah, and that's. That's beautiful, and it's good to have you here and talk about the organization.
Larry Zilliox:And so tell us a little bit about your military background. You're a JAG officer, and how long were you in the army?
Col. Schaffer:I always love to challenge people with a guess I'm going to guess.
Larry Zilliox:well, I'm guessing you easily did 20.
Col. Schaffer:More than that.
Larry Zilliox:Wow.
Col. Schaffer:I served just a hair over 33 years Wow.
John Wall:Come on, that's amazing. Thank you for your service. So what did you enlist?
Larry Zilliox:when you were seven. I wish our listeners could see you. There's no way. Come on Really, wow.
Col. Schaffer:Well, I like to think you, you know God is just really good, and when you are about serving his mission, you can't help but to be in a state of mind, mentally, physically, to be together, because people are going to be looking at you how you stand up and represent and look to defend others and a lot of ways they're going to be looking. What is that example standing before me and what is that example that wants to stand in the presence of my children, to be there in my state?
Larry Zilliox:To be the light as Jesus was the light to us.
John Wall:That's amazing.
Larry Zilliox:What's the number one mission of the foundation?
Col. Schaffer:Our primary mission is about leadership development and advocacy. With regard to the advocacy, we want to make sure that parents have the tools, the knowledge and the information to be able to advocate for their children. Oftentimes, we have found that there are certain situations that may be happening with the child and they may not know how to advocate for their child, depending on what the particular issue is, and so we want to be able to provide resources so that they have the information, the knowledge and the tools that they need to be able to advocate for the best interests of their child. Oftentimes this could be in a health, medical setting, just social settings. It really just depends. So that's one of the primary things.
Col. Schaffer:The next thing is about leadership development. We see our children. They are our warriors. They look at us and they see leaders before them that are going out there to fight and be in harm's way, and so maybe they may be the next one in line, and so they've already kind of had a representation of what that looks like. But sometimes it's all about you know what is that person going to be, you know how are they going to look at themselves and being that next person in line to stand up and to take on leadership, and whether that leadership happens in the military forces, whether that is leader of industry, leader of other types of organizations. We want to make sure that our children are prepared to take on the mantle when the time comes.
Larry Zilliox:Do you find that there's a real need for something like that because of just the overall disruption that children military children in particular face when not only are parents deployed but there's a lot of permanent change of station, so you've got a child that maybe spends one year in one grade at one school and next year two years in another school in another state or even another country. I would think that that could lead to children having trouble just trying to figure out who they are, what their future is, and it just sounds like that's a great program that helps them sort of figure out their path forward, right.
Col. Schaffer:That's exactly what we're there to do. It's interesting that you mentioned how our children are finding themselves often displaced, and so they're serving the country in their own way. They're missing out on relationships, whether that be with parent, having that steady social circle, and so now, like you said, they're really trying to figure out well, who am I in all of this and how can I find my way. And so with that leadership development, it really enables them to see kind of who they can become. And so we actually did a program this past summer with some youth, and one of our focuses was to develop their advocacy skills, because that's part of leadership Really understanding how can you stand up for the rights of others and also how do you stand up for the rights of others and also how do you stand up for the rights of yourself.
Col. Schaffer:When you talk about children having to go to one school this year and another school that year, oftentimes they feel ostracized, they don't feel a sense of community or connection to that particular school, and so now they're trying to figure out how can I begin to find my way in a new environment. And so they're the ones who are most vulnerable, and so when they find themselves in that situation of vulnerability. Now they have to, like, reach down deep within themselves to say, well, who am I? To say, well, who am I? I'm a person, I have certain rights and I understand what my rights are. And so now it's about how can I best advocate for that, to show that I'm just as much entitled to being here as you are, and so bringing that out, and then they can stand their ground, they can be there to ensure that their interests are protected as they navigate all of these different environments.
John Wall:Wow, that's pretty good. You know I served as well and I was in the Navy and I remember, throughout my career I'd always, you know, hear stories. You don't. You always take out a grain of salt, because you never know. You know what is true, what isn't, because you're not involved. You know, I was just a single sailor trying to find my way through the Navy and you know we would always hear things about kids or see things in kids, and obviously not all of them, but the challenges and you know, sometimes they get into the adult world and it's very difficult for them.
John Wall:And you know I, I married, uh, my wife and her father was in the air force and so she, from a young age, you know, actually she was born on a base in South Carolina. You know there are different challenges there and a lot of things you have shared that you guys have found, um, you know she, she's seen it, she's, you know, been involved in it and experienced it. And you know, the good thing is, I think, with the Air Force, is they typically keep their families together. You know, it's not. They can travel a lot of places, so it's a little different there. She still had that stability with her dad and mom.
John Wall:You know, being home, it's good to see that we have an organization out here. You know, wanting to protect the children and give them those skills sets that they need to be, you know, like a whole lot. You know live their whole life and you know they can. You know, no matter what their challenges are, they can still, you know, work through those challenges and come out on the better side of the life and you know learn how to lead and then eventually that probably leads them to. I'm sure you guys probably follow them through their life after you've had them come through the program. Maybe I'm mistaken there, but I assume that as they get into the adult life, that they're able to actually go back and help others as well.
Col. Schaffer:Yes.
Col. Schaffer:So we look at it, reach back.
Col. Schaffer:You know, we give them the tools to prepare them to be able to lead the way, and so the way we look at it is we know who stands in front of us, that's a child in need, but we don't know who may stand in front of that child and who they may have the ability to impact and influence.
Col. Schaffer:And so, when they find themselves in a situation that now they must make a decision as to how they are going to move about their life when faced with a particular situation, we want to make sure that they are ready to meet the moment, because, again, we don't know what the plan is for any one of us, and so some of us are in situations where we may have the ability to influence just one or two, but then there are others who have the ability to influence more, hundreds and thousands of more, and don't we want to make sure that, when they are in that position, that they have the tools to be able to be impactful, empathetic, logical reasoning, because a lot of people are going to be taking their cues from them.
John Wall:Absolutely we do. We want it to be a positive light, not a dark light. Exactly, Absolutely.
Larry Zilliox:I think, too, that it's so important to build resiliency into children, especially military children, because of the unique pressures that are brought to bear upon them. You know military DOD report, the latest report I saw, on active duty soldiers and suicide in the military. It included numbers on civilians, including roughly 150 spouses and adults, and I think the number was 43 children that took their own lives. That's way too many.
Larry Zilliox:It's just unbelievable yeah you know, and unfortunately, because children have trouble advocating for themselves, their needs very often on military installations go unnoticed and commands are unresponsive, either because they're unaware or they just don't care. That mission takes priority, which it shouldn't when it comes to children, but it does. In the culture of the military, the mission is always first and I'm really thrilled that this month, april coming up, is the month of the military child. Part of why John and I wanted to do this with you was to get the word out. So I know there's a big World Expo coming up here locally in Northern Virginia.
Larry Zilliox:That's going to be Saturday, april 26th, and there's a number of things going on, but the main thing is that there'll be a expo World Expo at Pentagon City Mall which is right next to the Pentagon pretty appropriate which includes a talent show and some breakout seminars, and it's a tabling event for nonprofits such as ours. So we'll be there, and I'm sure there'll be other organizations that are veteran service organizations or military service organizations. But can you tell us a little bit about what our listeners can expect, because I want them all to attend for sure. But what's it going to be like?
Col. Schaffer:Well, so let me tell you a little bit about the purpose of the Expo.
Col. Schaffer:The main goal was to bring organizations out of their four walls I say they're either their concrete walls or their virtual walls because they have something to offer.
Col. Schaffer:They have something to offer in service of our military children and their families. Sometimes they may be in places where they can't be found, or maybe there are families that have exhausted the services of a particular organization and they don't know where to go next. And so let's look at it as two types of organizations. We've got our A organization, the go-to organizations, and then we've got the B organization, that's the one that we may or may not know about, and so the family has exhausted all of the services and resources available that A organization has to offer. But now B organization has some specific needs, some specific capabilities that a family could benefit from, and so by bringing those organizations out of their particular silo communities, now we're putting them in a place where families can see what are other resources and services out there to be able to serve my family. So it's to offer information, it's to shore up what the family has available to ensure that they can be on that pathway to success.
Larry Zilliox:So one of the things that I've learned over time of doing the podcast and talking to a lot of military service organizations and veteran service organizations is that we tend to know one, maybe two things about the organization, but they do 10 things. And that is really where the Expo is really going to shine, I think, because once you get the organizations out there to talk to not only the children and the service member but also the community, to say, hey, we help military children but it's not free, so we need donations and we need volunteers and we need a lot of support. So you know, tabling events are very often the lifeblood of veteran service organizations and organizations that help military families, and I don't really think that the public at large is really aware of the stress and pressures on military families. Very often well certainly 90% of military families do not live on a military installation. They are forced to live in the community and they receive housing allowance, but it rarely covers the cost of living in the community around these installations. Or when they do live in the community and find affordable housing, it tends to be so far away from the base to where they can find something that they can pay for that the children are out in the middle of the country or totally out of their environment. Then there's also the stress of PCS moving For a family. You can never PCS and not have it cost you money. There's always incidental expenses and things that just need to be paid for that you're not reimbursed for, and then the list just goes on and on and on.
Larry Zilliox:And so it's these organizations that you're bringing together that are the ones that step into the void and say we're here to help, but we can't do it alone.
Larry Zilliox:We need the community to help us, and you know the Military Children's Sixth Foundation is no different. I want to direct our listeners to your webpage, which is wwwMilitaryChildrenSixthFoundationorg, so you can go directly to the webpage or you can Google Military Children's Sixth Foundation and when you get there, right on the main page, in the upper right, where you'll find it, for almost every veteran service organization or military service organization is a donate button, and I want our listeners to bang on that and make a donation. Look at the work they're doing and click on that button and give what you can. Now. If it's five bucks, they'll take five bucks. Let me tell you. If it's $5,000, they're happy to take that money from you, but you can put it towards a good cause. You really can. The other thing to do is to come out and support Military Children World Expo at Pentagon City Mall. It's going to be a fun day, so what's the lineup for that day?
Col. Schaffer:Well, at the beginning we're going to start with a caregiver's breakfast. That is happening at the Army-Navy Country Club. That begins at 8 am. That goes from 8 to 10. At 10 o'clock we are starting a Fit to Run. It's a 3K run, walk, roll, push, push. However you can complete that, can I drive it?
John Wall:well, that's the one that's out, larry, come on, we'll go. We'll make sure we walk. You can push me I'll push you.
Col. Schaffer:There you go, I can push, so your physical ability whatever your physical ability is, we want you to be able to use that. We wanted to make sure that there was like a physical component connected with the expo and really be able to get the community engaged. So now everybody can kind of come out and be a support to military children and the families, and being able to engage in an activity like that, that is the best way to do it. In an activity like that, that is the best way to do it. Everyone loves the opportunity to get together, get out, walk, run, whatever have you on a beautiful day, and so we're going to be doing that from 10 to noon, and then from noon to five is the expo and that's where there are lots of things teed up for the day. So we will have a nice opening ceremony. We want to make sure that the community really understands what it means to be part of a military connected community, and so everyone has an opportunity to see. You know the pomp and circumstance of military celebration, but it's all for the purpose of celebrating our military children. We want to make sure that they are heard, that they are seen and that they are celebrated Also, and so during that we have various activities taking place. So we have the dreams auditions that we just did, and so we're looking to bring forth some really great talent to the stage, and the goal is to celebrate you know, the gifts and talents of our children, and what a better way to celebrate it is in front of as many people to see the gifts that our kids have.
Col. Schaffer:The next one is unbreakable crowns, because you talked earlier about you know what children must endure while living the life as a military child, and sometimes some go through more hardships than others, but they always end up landing on their feet.
Col. Schaffer:They know how to make it to the other side. There may be some services that is needed along the way, sure, but at the end of the day, they can still find themselves having risen through, gotten through those ashes of life, and find themselves victorious on the other side. So that's what an unbreakable crown is about, and so we have six categories for those unbreakable crowns and we've had some awards I'm sorry, some nominations put through for that, and so we can't wait to be able to give those crowns out. The next thing is we have two symposiums we have an education symposium and we have a family, health and wellness symposium. So there's really a lot to do again, you know, for military children so that they feel celebrated, seen and heard. The families can get together and do their things, but the community as a whole can come together and celebrate our military children and their families.
John Wall:So, for folks that don't listen to podcasts or aren't aware of this particular podcast at this moment, are you on any other platforms? Are you getting the word out in other fashions or manners currently?
Col. Schaffer:Yes, so we have been doing things on Instagram, putting information out there on Facebook, and we're getting ready to start a pretty intensive campaign on social media to really make sure that we can rile up the crowd and get them interested in coming out to the expo.
John Wall:Come out and support these kids. Yes, yes, I love to see. I'm going to have to talk to the wife. I might have to get us out there and check this out and support these kids. Yes, I love to see. Uh, I'm gonna have to talk to the wife. I might have to get us out there and uh check this out and see what it's about. Maybe uh hang out at our table I'm assuming there's. How many vendors do you currently have coming? Do you know?
John Wall:we have approximately 20 vendors okay, great, yes, okay, and I saw something on your website. We focus a lot on the the uh acting service members currently, right now, their families, the children more particularly. Is there something out there for children that are with a veteran family that you could that y'all help support as well, or is it just focused on the ones that are currently serving, or is it just focused on the ones that are?
Col. Schaffer:currently serving. Well, that's the whole thing about Military Children's Six. We embrace all of our children from military families. So no matter whether the parent is currently serving or whether the parent served in uniform 15, 20 years ago Fabulous, Because it's all about understanding what the culture, the connectivity and the community of that military child is. And we realize some children have the ability to experience that because bloodline of service runs right through you and maybe you didn't get the opportunity experience growing up with your military parent in service. But we want you to understand what it means to serve and value that service. So again, by extension, because they were the servants who were giving their lives in service and protection of our country, we want to make sure that their children get the benefit of that.
John Wall:That's good, that's really good. You know, there's so many, I'd say, veterans who you know don't make a career, you know, and they're out there in the communities and they have children they may have had that child while they were serving or children, and it's good to see that we're able, and your organization is able, to support them and still help them out even though they're not currently serving. So that's really good.
Larry Zilliox:Well, once again, the webpage is militarychildrens6foundationorg. I encourage everybody to go to the webpage, check it out, look at all the wonderful work that they're doing. Make sure you donate to the organization. Hit that donate button. I guarantee you it's not going to take long to part with your money. But everybody who goes to that web page needs to make a donation to make this expo happen and, hopefully, if expos like this in the future.
Larry Zilliox:Well, colonel, I just want to thank you for coming by the retreat and sitting down for a few minutes with us and telling us about this amazing organization and this wonderful, wonderful world exppo that's going to go on highlighting military children, because for far too long they've just been overlooked. Their needs have been overlooked, their abilities have been overlooked and, like you say, they are the future, whether they're in the military or they're not, these are future leaders and they certainly, just by virtue of their environment, come to develop a mindset of patriotism and supporting the military and the community. I mean we so many of our veterans here are our volunteers, are veterans and they bring their children and say this is a way to give back. You have to give back because you lead a pretty special life and so thank you so much for coming out and and really helping us understand what the organization is about and and this great, great event. So thank you.
John Wall:Yes, thank you, ma'am. Thank you for being here. It's an honor to have you here at our organization and we're honored actually to help support you and your vision and mission, and we also appreciate your service to our country. So thank you.
Col. Schaffer:Well, thank you so much. You know it's not every day you get an opportunity to make a connection, and a connection that enables you to reach the people that you're really trying to impact, and so thank you for giving us the opportunity, and we certainly look forward to other opportunities such as this, and hopefully we can see a lot of families out there to enjoy the expo on April, the 26th.
Larry Zilliox:Well, we'll be there. I know that we'll be there and it's going to be a fun day. I really appreciate it. But hey, if you have any suggestions or comments, you can reach us. At podcast, at willingwarriorsorg. You can find us on your favorite podcasting platform. We're also available on YouTube and very soon we'll have episodes on Wreaths Across America Radio, so look for that in the near future. Until then, we'll have another episode for you next Monday morning at 0500. Thanks for listening.
