Seasons of JOY (Autumn)

Welcome to another episode of Seasons of Joy--A quarterly series produced with the help of  Stacy's friend and kindred, mindfulness coach Joy Jordan.  The series was born out of their  shared love of nature, the seasons, and their belief that each season holds its own wisdom.  

When Stacy and Joy get together to record each episode, they chat about the challenges and juicy bits each season holds, as well as sharing examples with YOU on  how to each get through the challenging moments each season holds.

Episode Links:

Joy Jordan's Website
Stacy's Website

Transcript

SPEAKER_00: 0:04

Welcome to Full Spirals, a podcast where we tell the stories of belonging to this big human family and honor the raw human connections the arts consistently facilitate. It's about how life can take you for a spin, but still leave you grounded. We learn about hope and healing through the arts and the many ways creativity can lead you right back to yourself. We're so happy to have you along for the ride. I'm Stacy Parish. Today's episode is another in the quarterly series that we're calling Seasons of Joy. Yes, this series did get its name in part because my partner on these episodes is my good friend, mindfulness coach Joy Jordan. But we also wanted to include the words seasons in our title because both Joy and I believe strongly in the power of paying attention to the patterns, the transitions, and the celebrations that we all experience each time the Wheel of the Year turns to a new season. Here in the Upper Midwest, each of the four seasons has its own unique flavor, its unique fingerprint. And Joy and I chat about what this season, the one we're in right now, is bringing and how we're moving through it. Mindfully, creatively, and yeah, joyfully. Hi Joy. You didn't even do a sound check. How do I sound, Stacy? I actually I turned you up a little bit. Sound check. Sound check. Okay. Hi, this is Joy. Nice. I think we're good. Okay. All right. Hi, Joy. Hi, Stacy. How's it going? It's going well. Good day today. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01: 1:44

Even though it's this rainy, kind of blustery, cool day. Very fall-like. I'd say this feels very fall. It's probably appropriate that we had this weather when we're recording our fall episode.

SPEAKER_00: 1:57

Yeah, agreed.

SPEAKER_01: 1:58

Do we get into it?

SPEAKER_00: 1:59

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, we're looking at each other like, should we do it? Should we do it?

SPEAKER_01: 2:02

So it's fall. It's autumn. I have to say, I'm pretty feeling pretty good this autumn. Just personally, it's been it's been a good fall so far. But typically we talk about what the season brings that's challenging and difficult. Do you want to begin?

SPEAKER_00: 2:19

Yeah, I will actually, because autumn was, is, and always will be my favorite season. However, the change of the season itself this year, as well as the tasks that go along with it, feel different this year. And I sort of relate more to the folks who don't like it getting darker and don't like it getting colder and feel like there's a loss happening. And part of it, well, I think a lot of it has to do with my new work. I've been working on my own for many years and not punching a clock. And now that I am punching a clock, I don't just run outside whenever I feel like it. So you don't have the flexibility to step outside whenever you want to. Right. I mean, I kind of could, but I'm still at work. So it's not like I can just say, I'm gonna go and get back whenever I feel like it. It's not that. So as the daylight runs out, I'm feeling that loss in a way that I have not before.

SPEAKER_01: 3:22

Yeah. So I also just want to say for the audience, Stacey has been working. She's been self-employed. And so now because I don't want people to think like, hey, I'm just not working at all, and now I have to work. No, you've been working your butt off. It's just you've been doing it on your own schedule with a little bit more flexibility.

SPEAKER_00: 3:38

Yeah, I've been entrepreneuring it as a, you know, an artist in the gig economy for many years. And now I am working, I'm still using my talents and my gifts, but I'm I'm working for someone. It's requiring a lot more acceptance. Yeah. And it takes psychological, mental, emotional energy that I didn't know it was going to take. So the things that ordinarily are easy, like changing over my closet or that kind of stuff, are just a little more challenging this season.

SPEAKER_01: 4:07

Yeah. And I think the many in the audience will relate to that. They'll relate to, wow, I'm gone all day. You get home, and wow, I have this whole list of things to do. Yeah. And that is really challenging. Yeah. How have you been working with it?

SPEAKER_00: 4:20

I can say that one of the things that I've been really intentional about is just ex learning, once again, another AFG, learning to accept limitation. Hooray, let's learn that lesson again. Things aren't gonna happen on my timeline. Oh, okay. Yeah, it's just it's just a new thing. And I hope this doesn't strike the listeners as like, well, duh. But it's new to me. It's new to me.

SPEAKER_01: 4:48

So well, even if it's not new, new, this layer of it is new. And I think we all gain increasing insights as we move through this life. And they each time we get them, they seem like a no duh. Yeah. But not until we realize it. Yeah. And it's a slightly different realization than you've had in the past.

SPEAKER_00: 5:09

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01: 5:10

Well, what's hard for me in autumn, and first I just want to say I feel pretty good this autumn. And I know the last few I've felt that sense of sadness or grief much more than this season. And that's just a great realization that things do change, you know. Yeah. Even how we feel a season can be different. You and I both enjoy the transition seasons, the spring and the fall, but spring is my favorite and fall is yours. Fall is ultimately, like by its end, a season of grief, of letting go. There is that natural shifting into dormancy. And there are two people, my mother and a really close friend, who died in this fall season in September. And those fit in with that sense of the season of grief and loss. And so I will often feel those anniversaries, those death anniversaries, and then they're connected to the season, which is related to grief and loss. And I think for anyone in any season, there may be some anniversaries of things that have happened. And just I think it's helpful to just notice when those show up. And for whatever reason, this year there wasn't as strong of sadness associated with those and more of just remembering and honoring and caring. So that can be hard though for me in fall. Definitely as we're moving toward the darkness and the losing the green, which I love so much. That's all hard. I think of that more so associated with winter, but we're heading into that now. Oh, so what do you enjoy? What have you been enjoying about fall?

SPEAKER_00: 6:48

What I enjoy, it's the same thing I enjoy every year, are the colors, the fall colors. I just I live for that stuff, and they absolutely never disappoint. These weeks, last week and this week, are my absolute favorites because the reds, the reds come out. And I always pick up leaves on my walks. But ordinarily at least once a season, I haven't done it yet this season, but I will collect lots and lots of leaves on a walk, and then I'll create a piece of some kind on the floor or outside or wherever, and I'll take a picture of it. Just using the leaves almost as my paint, for lack of a better word. Um, I haven't done that yet, but I absolutely adore the leaves. I love the way they smell. I love that they're different every year and they're the same every year. And outside, you probably saw as you walked in, we have these gorgeous deciduous vines that are green in the spring, and right now they're crimson. They're crimson and they fall on our doorstep. They fall on our doorstep. And I have a little altar that I put things of the season on, regardless of what the season is. And I have some of those big massive elephant ear, almost looking deciduous red leaves. And one thing that's happening, I just realized it today. This is something that I haven't realized before, but I feel like I'm in the autumn of my life, and I have this thing happening where I am settling into and beginning to actually accept the older skin that I'm in. I I mean, catch me on any day. This could be different because I am tiptoeing towards, I'm gonna be 59 in February, so I'm tiptoeing towards 60. And I think I've told you before, the years before a milestone are much harder for me than the actual milestone itself. So yeah, you could catch me tomorrow and I'll be like, oh my god, I'm gonna be 60. I can't believe my youth is gone. But right now I'm I'm really settling into and accepting this older skin that I'm in. And so my leaves are falling off. Who cares?

SPEAKER_01: 8:54

I'm still like your leaves are vibrant, honey. Good God, you have vibrant leaves. I'll take that. I'll take that. But isn't it? I feel like getting older. Yes, there are the aches and the pains and the things we have to work through with our bodies, no question. But I just like myself better every year. I know myself better. I feel better in my own skin and being me. All of that comes from aging. We don't get that in our 20s and our 30s. You know, we're working hard to do that exploration, that inner exploration and the growth to get to this place where you can think, hey, I've got some vibrant leaves. And yeah, some of them are a little crumbly and maybe a little brown, but you know, still mine and and just enjoying that. So that's great. Yeah. Oh, Stacey, I love the colors too. It is such a beautiful time to be outside. And I love being outside. Nature is a bomb for me. I have a friend who is not religious, and she said something to me: nature is my church or nature is my religion. And I just that resonates for me. Uh, there is calm, there is beauty, there is wisdom in nature, and this is just a beautiful time to be outside. There is this amazing abundance, this vibrancy of all of the leaves. And right now, as Stacy and I are talking, we are in peak color here in Wisconsin, where we are. Yeah, it's gorgeous. Stunning. And then in two weeks, all the leaves will be gone. So you m shift from this spectacular to nothing. And I think that transition is hard. And that's where you really can kind of feel that sense of loss and grief. And I feel like whenever we're talking about what's hard and what's good, whether it's about the seasons or about our lives, they're always interrelated. Whatever's hard is bringing into relief what's good, and whatever's good, part of that has come out of maybe the challenges. And so all of this is related. Yeah. So you already spoke a little bit about how you're taking care of yourself, maybe elaborate a little bit more or add some other things. How are you taking care of yourself?

SPEAKER_00: 11:08

I had the realization last week. I had a sage's story circle, and when I was there, it's sort of a uh a forced deadline for me to do something creative because I facilitate the story circle. So I like to show up with a story. So I did some writing, I wrote a story, I went to the circle, and I was so nourished by, I mean, those ladies show up, they deliver every time. Our theme was magic. They told so many beautiful stories around the theme of magic. And after the circle, I realized how much I have been neglecting my creative side. And it's so funny because I preach that stuff, right? Like, don't neglect your creative side. And I just I got so caught up in the minutia of work and the hustle and the bustle. I didn't realize I need a day off during the week and and I'm gonna take it. The the sages meet the first and third Thursday of every of every month, but I decided I'm gonna take every Thursday off. And I have also signed up for a women's poetry circle on Thursdays. So I'm yeah. Thursdays. Yeah, that's a special day. Thursdays are a special day, yeah. It starts at the very end of October and it goes through December. And heck yeah. Yeah. I'm gonna lean into that again. Who knew? Who knew?

SPEAKER_01: 12:31

Who knew? Yeah. Oh, I am taking care of myself. I've already told Stacy this, but I have not yet told you listeners this. I've identified this year that November is the really hardest month for me. And that awareness, I think, has been very helpful. November is hardest for me because that's when the time change happens. In fact, it's happening very early. I think it's November 2nd that it's happening. So it happens early in the month, that time change, and all of a sudden nighttime is dark for the month of November and then a bit into December. That's when it's darkest early. That time at 4:35, like that's when it's dark. And that impacts me. I think it impacts a lot of people, but for me, that's really challenging time. All the leaves, or most of the leaves, are typically off the trees. Grass is starting to turn brown because we will have gotten some cooler, colder temperatures. So it's the brown landscape, bare trees, no light at night. And then at least here in Wisconsin, November, we often have more gray days, fewer sunny days. Now, oh goodness, I would love it if we had a ton of sunny days this November. That would be great. Could happen. But all of that means that it's just a challenging month for me. I do enjoy Thanksgiving. I think that's a beautiful holiday, but that's just one small slice of November. All right. So given that, what? So these are gonna sound so small, but they've already filled me with like, oh, I could do that. I have in my basement a star, the eco candle. They have, I don't know if you've been in there and you see those stars that are just beautiful like um patterns, and then you stick a light in the middle, and they're just gorgeous, these stars. And one of those had been hanging a different place in our house, and it's been down in the basement. And I thought, when the time change happens, I'm bringing that particular star up to my office, and I'm gonna put I'm gonna intentionally put it someplace so that every day I click on that lit star, and it just a way to say, hey, this is something to embrace the light of this this particular star. I love that. So I'm doing that. I've set up an art date with a friend for the weekend after the time change. And she's going to come over like at that 3:30 or 4 time where it's starting to get dark, and we're just gonna do art together and talk uh until you know 5 30 or something, and then she'll go off and we will have made it through that period, nourishing ourselves through just conversation and art. And then once we do that, I'll set up another one of those, I think, with her. Yeah. So just trying to not resist November, but fill it up with some more intention. And I don't think I've ever identified November in that way. I might think of December or January, but I'm just really trying to nourish in November. And then the other thing I've mentioned before on the on the pod is that I'm trying to say yes to more things, not too many things, but winter will come soon enough and it'll be those cold, blustery evenings where I don't want to go out. I don't I want to be cozy inside. Yeah. It's still a beautiful season, so I'm just trying to say yes to more things while I can to just fill up before we head into that rest and dormancy.

SPEAKER_00: 15:56

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01: 15:56

Wonderful. And we certainly invite everyone listening to think about how to take care of yourself, even when it does feel like so much is going on, and really, you know, so much is going on in our own lives and in our country and in the world. So, how do we take care of ourselves, nourish ourselves through that so we can be our best selves in every season of nature and our lives? And it can be something really simple, like you said.

SPEAKER_00: 16:23

Bring that star upstairs. Bring a star upstairs. And just light it when it gets dark. Just click it on it. Light a candle or whatever. We're gonna make it through autumn. Oh, yeah, November. Yeah, we're gonna make it through November. We're gonna stay standing and we're gonna stay vibrant. We're gonna stay vibrant. Oh, thanks, Stacey. Yeah, you're welcome. Bye. Bye. This episode was produced by Boom Arts in Appleton, Wisconsin. Theme music by Helen Abakian, additional music provided by Beth Killy. If you liked what you heard today, please rate, review, and most importantly, share full spirals. Bring your friends and fam along for the ride on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Google Podcasts, or your favorite listening platform. Because we really are all in this together. Till next time, take care of the video.