Out Here Tryna Survive
This podcast is a trauma-informed, hope-oriented, safe space. It is a warm hug of solidarity for Black women 35+. It is a celebration of our resilience thus far & our determination to not only survive but THRIVE.
Join me, Grace Sandra, a Mama, author, advocate/activist, storyteller, for some good ole self-love shenanigans.
We are braver than we believe✨
Out Here Tryna Survive
Ep 30: Y'all not Finna Convince me to Mourn the Fashy; Charlie Kirk
The feed won’t stop. One more video of a life ending, one more thread turning human pain into content—and our nervous systems keep paying the price. I’m talking frankly about what it’s like to be inundated by violent imagery, how selective empathy fractures trust, and why we need boundaries that protect our peace without blurring our values.
I share personal updates from a year of real healing—therapy, Gabor Maté’s The Myth of Normal, The Body Keeps the Score, long walks, and a stubborn commitment to more joy. Then we get into the hard stuff: the public reaction to Charlie Kirk’s death, the gulf between tone and truth, and how civility can be used to launder harm. We unpack why scripture, read inductively, centers the poor, the immigrant, and the vulnerable—and how that lens challenges Christian nationalism’s power plays. We also take on gun violence and why “more guns at schools” is a fear industry talking point, not a safety plan.
Most importantly, we map a path back to center. Practical tools include turning off violent videos while staying informed, restructuring your algorithm, claiming a weekly reset day, and using diaphragmatic breathing to steady your body before you act. We talk about following Black women’s leadership for moral clarity, building micro-environments you can control, and treating joy as a strategy that keeps you resourced for the long haul. If you’ve felt torn between staying engaged and staying sane, this conversation offers honest language, grounded perspective, and a plan you can start today.
If this resonated, subscribe, share with a friend who needs a reset, and leave a review so more people can find the show. Your support helps this community grow—and helps all of us keep showing up with clear eyes and steady hearts.
Most of us the other day just watch a man get shot in his neck. Because of social media, we've seen a lot of murders. I mean, just in the last year, I've seen so many kids beheaded in Gaza, and it's just not what we are meant for. We are not meant to see people get murdered over and over and over and over again. We are not meant to see things like what happened with George Floyd. We're not meant to see people take their last breath like by the hundreds. By the hundreds. We're just not. So first thing I want to say is if you're feeling a little overwhelmed, I'm with you, sis. I'm with you. And I'm trying to figure out what I can do to calm my ass down. So I want to talk about that today. I want to talk a little bit a little bit about everything. I know it's been a while since I've been back. Well, first of all, first of all, for those of you who are just listening on audio or Apple, I got the date correct. So if you watch on YouTube, you know that this is like my Achilles heel. I never have the date correct. Today is, in fact, Monday, September 15th. Second of all, I got some new glasses. I'm officially going blind blind. I mean, no, not really, but like my eyesight is getting really bad, I think due to perimenopause. So, how y'all like the glasses? I am gonna take them off in a minute because I'm realizing that it's just, I don't know, the glare is not giving what it should be giving because I have like four screens in front of me. I'm gonna take them off. So, anyway, hey, how y'all doing? It's been over a month since I've been here. I've just been, you know, really honestly and truly living my best life. I have been in such a great place emotionally. Like, this is probably one of the most peaceful years that I've had in such a long time. I was actually telling a friend, like, maybe ever, because I feel like I'm in such a better place emotionally, just in general, in terms of like having access to the tools I need to get through what I'm going through with the people I have around me. I'm just in such a better place and have made better choices. You know how when you start to make better choices, when you learn things about your healing journey, you make better choices, and the choices just keep adding up and adding up and adding up, and then you're like, wow, like those good choices added up to this and that and this and that. I feel better. So yeah, I really feel like I've been healing. I got back in therapy this year, which was such a wonderful thing for me. And we've been reading through a book, I will post it here, uh Gabriel Mate's The Myth of Normal. And I also started listening to The Body Keeps the Score on Audible on my walks. So I will also link that. Those are two really good books if you've been through trauma or are currently going through trauma. So anyway, child. But yeah, I so I've just been having fun. You know, I listened to this Abraham Hicks video. It's like one of those compilations, you know, that people do where they just put Abraham Hicks' words over music. And one of the things she says in there is, I'm gonna have way more fun. I'm gonna have way more fun. And I just have found myself wanting to have fun. If you have been on a healing journey, then you know, you know, you know, you know that a lot of times you just don't want to do anything. You just want to be in the house. It's really hard sometimes to just get out there and go have fun. But this year I've been letting myself do that. Okay, child, let's first talk about the Charlie Kirk thing. I just feel so frustrated. It's really, really, really frustrating again, yet again, to have to rub up against white people and how they respond to certain things and don't respond to other things. Some white folks have been so loud since Charlie Kirk's death about how unfair it is, about how political violence shouldn't be a thing, about how he was a husband and a father, but they never have that same energy for black and brown people. They never have that same energy for other people. You know, no one should be killed for their political beliefs, but they should be killed for being immigrants, they should be deported to countries where they have never lived and don't know the language. That's not even for their beliefs, that's just for being an immigrant in America. They should be eaten by alligators because a lot of y'all was real excited about that. It just can get so frustrating. Also, there's been so many school shootings, and the conservatives have not said as much about the school shootings that they have about Charlie Kirk. Even on my timeline, like my Facebook timeline, I've done a pretty good job, I thought, at weeding out people who just aren't thoughtful. But there were so many people who posted stuff that I was like, I literally can't believe this. I can't believe this. It's so frustrating to come up against people who give so much energy for the value of one white male life. Like that one white male or sometimes women's lives is so much more important, and it has to fit a certain demographic because there was no energy given, there was no energy given for that woman and her husband that was shot and her dog. Uh, what was that like a month or two ago? I forgot how long ago that was. By conservatives, that is. Anyway, I wanted to share with y'all an interaction I had with a white woman because on my timeline, I have done, like I said, pretty well at weeding. But occasionally, you know, there's people out there. I have, as I've mentioned before to y'all, like before it was really very steeped in evangelical culture. I was doing ministry before, I was in writing communities that were that had a lot of Christian women. And then, you know, if you can't tell gasp, I'm half white, so I have quite a few white family members as well. And the way they see things sometimes is so frustrating because to me, to me, to me, to me, as a woman who is biracial, who identifies as black, who is an ally to the LGBTQ plus community. If I had a friend who was adamantly who was homophobic and transphobic, I wouldn't continue to associate with them in any real or meaningful way because I would want to look at my friends who are gay or trans and be like, hey, I'm an ally for you, so I'm not still kikiing with the person who hates you. You know what I'm saying? The way that the white people in my life will cape for and have caped for Charlie Kirk since his unaliving, like they knew him, like they was kikiing at breakfast every other Sunday morning after church, it's wild to me knowing all the stuff he said about black people, knowing all the stuff he said about black women. It's like if you value the black brown people in your life, people who are immigrants, people who are Arabs, people who are Palestinians, people who are women, because I mean I guess it does depend on your belief system, but he said so much about how women should be basically just servants to to men. I mean, he's he said so much that's so it's giving handmaids tale, y'all. Like I just I don't understand how someone could be like, yeah, but I'm still your friend though, but like, yeah, I'm gonna I'm gonna cape for him real quick. It doesn't make sense. I it's it's a leap that I cannot go there with. But anyway, I wanted to tell y'all this interaction I had with a white woman friend because I was just like, This is insane. This is literally insane. So she posted something that basically said, I'm so sad about Charlie because he was the example of what God would have wanted, or something like he is the example that Jesus values. Something that was literally the most ridiculous thing I'd ever heard. I hope I can find her post. I hope she didn't she didn't take it down because she's one of the ones I did not block. Let me see if I can find it, y'all. Let me see, let me see. See, now I'm already troubled because me and her had a private a private DM and she just literally posted something else. She's like, Oh, here, watch this exchange with Charlie exchanging with the Satanist. He's so gentle and respectful. Girl, bye. Oh, and she posted something else yesterday too. Talking about his solution to ending school shooters was armed guards in front of schools. He wants to protect children. His entire quote about the Second Amendment is important to read. Okay, let me just get to what she said on Friday. Let me just get to it, y'all, because she done stress me the hell out. Damn it, I just swiped away. Hold on. Okay, y'all. Uh Uncle, I do gotta put the glasses back on. This this is the part that I do really need the glasses where I'm really bad. It's this up close. Can't see a damn thing up close. I'm one of those like nerds like this, like with the phone all up in my face. So what she posted was 1 Peter 3.15. I'm not even gonna read the verse because it doesn't fucking matter. Anyway, she said, This is how Christians are supposed to present our faith with gentleness and respect. I believe Charlie Kirk was presenting his faith in this mantra, which is a good reminder for us. Aww. Anyway, so someone else said, Do you believe that being openly racist and sexist is Christian? I don't want to hear what his words were put up taken out of context. He openly condemned black people and said civil rights was a mistake. Okay, etc. So this is what I said. I said, Do you think that him thinking and saying that Palestinians are not real people is Christian? Because that is what he said, and he very much supported the genocide that is still ongoing. Then I said, if you stopped and examined all the stuff he said, you likely wouldn't have posted this. This man was openly hateful, openly, openly hateful, multiple, multiple, multiple quotes. But honestly, like even when I watch him interact with other people, like I just watched a clip today. If I can find it, I'll insert it where he was talking to a black man about the old testament versus the new testament, and he was this loud and wrong, just taking the old testament out of context about what God said about protect the nation, you know. Um, Jeremiah talking about protecting his nation, mo his nation, Moses protecting his nation, what Moses said in Deuteronomy. But anyway, all of that doesn't matter because the entire message of the Bible, if you really look at it, and I have looked at it and I have read it, and I actually went to seminary and studied this shit beyond like the 10 to 15 years that I spent in ministry studying the Bible. The message of the Bible, the message, if you really are studying it inductively, not deductively, inductively, is that God cares for the poor, God cares for the oppressed, God cares for women. I know that you might be shocked hearing that because the message of Christian nationalism and Christianity in general for so many years has been so anti, anti-immigrant, anti-poor, but like we are supposed to welcome the immigrant, we are supposed to take care of the poor, we are supposed to care for the most vulnerable people, that includes trans people, that includes whatever community is the most vulnerable, that includes poor people. That is what the entire message of the scripture is. If you look at it in its entirety, inductively, not deductively. So he was loud and wrong anyway, but even how he was interacting with him, my point was it was so dare I say narcissistic, and I know that word is overused, I know people are so sick of it, but here's the thing it's not always wrong. Sometimes people actually are just narcissistic, and I really do see those traits in Charlie as someone, again, who survived a very narcissistically abusive marriage. You see how it plays out and how they talk to people, you can see. I hope y'all know this is not a big surprise to anyone. Our even our president would acknowledge this maybe because they love this about themselves. But our president is a very grandiose narcissist. I don't care how fucking overused it is, it's clear as day. It's literally like saying the trees have green leaves. Like it's pretty clear. But Charlie also showed some of those signs and how he treated people. And it's funny because I see all of these white Christian conservative people talking about how he was with people, and I'm like, are we looking at the same thing? Like he's so belittling and so demeaning and so rude. Anyway, let me finish. So I said, This man was openly hateful. Openly. Jesus would have called him a Pharisee and flipped a table on him and his president. Please educate yourself. This is embarrassing. Then she said, I would love for you to educate me. Please share the video me with the video or news article so I can see this for myself. And then someone said, Please link evidence of him saying that Palestinians are not real people, or I just don't believe it. Another white woman. Oh child, these people are so annoying. I didn't even see this response. And then someone said, It's been days, it probably doesn't exist. More likely she heard it from a reliable source that spewed rhetoric that led to his assassination. Oh, they're so funny. Then she landed in my DMs the next day after she said, Please share with me. And I already knew, like, look, I'm not gonna do free labor for you. Whenever white people get on that whole tip of like share with me. And I'm like, no, no, black people, we we're not here to serve you and do your free labor when the internet is free, bitch. Like, look it up yourself. Look it up your fucking self. Oh, she deleted it. So then she ran to my DMs and said, I want to thank you for being respectful, for being respectful and giving me a chance to see what he has said that would hurt you. My post was about the videos I have seen of him discussing Christianity with Satanists and his respectful and gentle tone. He did not personally attack them. There's no motherfucking motive. Why would I lie on this man? I don't give a fuck. I wish that he hadn't said the hateful stuff he said. I wish that he wasn't such a fucking idiot. I wish, but like the very fact that white women and men ask for proof from black people constantly. Give me proof of the racism, give me proof of the bad stuff, give me proof. It's like, bitch, find the proof yourself. It's out there. Then she said, I looked up his insensitive comments with regard to hiring based only on gender or race, and I don't condone that. So the point he tried to make was lost in the delivery, though I do see his point. Anyway, I just want to thank you for taking the time to reach across in this divided time and be kind to me. And so I left her a voice clip and I said, Listen, I know that you might not see it because it doesn't hit your demographic as a white woman. Now, if you're wondering why I did this with her, why I did this emotional exchange, because we've met in person before. I liked her when we met in person. We met at a conference that I spoke at several years ago. I mean, literally, like probably 10 years ago. So we've been Facebook friends for 10 years. So I was trying to give her the benefit of the motherfucking doubt. Lord, was I wrong? Lord. Anyway, so I explained to her how many racist things he said and why she doesn't know about them because they're not hitting her demographic and she's not listening to any black women or anything we have to say. I just was like, it's very hurtful as a black woman to see you call my call yourself my friend and then uplift this man who says tons and tons and tons of racist stuff. You're uplifting him in his death like he was Jesus. No, come on. Anyway, so she said, I'm sorry. Thank you for taking the time to explain. I'm sure it's exhausting for you to explain. I'm glad we connected, and I value learning from people and not being so isolated, and I hope you are well. And then lo and motherfucking behold, just yesterday, she continues to post him. Post stuff about him. He was gentle, he was respectful, he wanted to protect kids. That's really funny. Oh, that's really funny. This man who literally, I I know y'all have heard this, so it's like I'm I'm hesitant to even say these things because I I I'm I don't want to keep repeating it over and over again, but like this man that literally said we are going to have some deaths if we allow for, you know, without doing any sort of gun reform. He didn't care about kids, baby. He didn't care about the kids. You talking about he wanna protect kids. You think having armed guards at all schools to protect kids from school shooters is the answer. Are you okay? Are you okay? Are you okay? You this is this is a this is a sign of your white privilege, baby. This is a sign of your white privilege that you don't understand how dumb an idea that is. Guns are the problem, so let's bring in more guns with more unhinged white men who are already 90, whatever percent of all the mass shooters. Like, are you okay? They're not. They're not. They're not. They're not. The white people in this country are not okay. Some of them are okay, but a lot of them that are not, they are not okay. Anyway, I I I I found myself, and then after I saw her post one more thing the next day, after me and her had this dialogue, and she apologized to me and thanked me for crossing a you know, for going across the racial divide, I just was like, I don't trust none of y'all. I can't trust none of y'all. I have made it a point to follow as many black women voices as I can on threads, on Instagram, on TikTok, on YouTube, in books and what I read, etc. Music, whatever. Because I I really value the voice of black women. Black women are, by the way, you know how they say the 92%. I saw something the other day about um, it was statistical evidence about how black women are the most statistically nonviolent. And what's crazy is that because of caricatures that have been portrayed about us of the angry black woman, the welfare mom, whatever, etc., the images that are portrayed over and over again with us twerking or whatever, knowing that we are statistically the most morally upright and non-violent demographic in the country, which is crazy if you think about it. We have so many wonderful things to say, continue to always be an advocate, continue to care about people who don't care about us. The thing is, y'all, I wouldn't have wanted. Well, let me think about that before I sit up here and lie. I mean, no, I never in all the stuff I ever heard about Charlie Kirk, I never had a thought in my mind that I wish he were unalive. That never hit my mind. The only time I've ever thought in my mind, like, wow, this world would be better if he weren't in it. A serious thought has only been twice, and that was one, my dad, because he violently sexually assaulted me and caused an upheaval of chaos in my life that has never gone away. Just lifetime consequences forever and ever. And y'all's president. Those are the only two times I've ever really had a serious thought in my head. Like, I wish that those people were didn't exist anymore. And I mean that. I mean that. I I never would have wanted Charlie to be unalived, but when he did, I don't give a fuck. I saw somebody post something about like when you see someone who's xenophobic, racist, against women, against women's rights, just a complete bigot and asshole like him. It is a cancer. Am I gonna sit around and be sad that cancer cells died? I no, no, I'm really not for white people out here policing black folk or anybody about their response to someone who said horrible things about Michelle Obama. I he just, you know what, he had a high school degree, he had a high school degree and called himself calling out Michelle Obama, Katanji Jackson, and I think Joanne Reed for their DEI positions when they all have degrees from Harvard, like all graduated Magna Coomb Lottie, and you know, and more. I don't even know all of their degrees. This man graduated from high school and knows how to debate people, capitalized on being a bigot, and has the nerve to say, if I see a black pilot, I'm wondering if he is there because of DEI and I'm afraid and I'm hoping he's qualified. You're not qualified for anything, you're a personality, you're a podcaster, and I because I'm podcasting, I know this requires no skill. The only skill it requires is literally trying to figure figure out how to connect the microphone to the to the to the picture. Literally, people without a high school degree do this. You're not qualified, sir, to assess anyone. I mean, he really was an asshole. I just I don't see how people don't see that. So yeah, anyway, y'all, I've been pissed. But my whole point is I decided that uh even before okay, but even before that, and I've talked about this in per previous episodes. I decided in 2025 that I was going to back up just a little bit because if you don't know me very well, I have I'm very activisty advocate. I'm I believe above all up in advocating for other people. Um, I believe in advocating for the poor and advocating for the marginalized. I believe that borders are ridiculous and man-made. I believe that we should, that immigrants should be able to be here. I believe in being good to people. I believe people should have universal health care. Like, oh my God, how violent of me. I believe kids should be able to get their lunches for free. I believe people should be able to give food stamps. Like, oh it's so sad that it's come to this. Like that I'm so controversial from these silly, stupid fucking little things of can we just provide for people because we have it? People are like, am I am I supposed to pay extra taxes because they they don't want to work? Yes, bitch, yes. If they can't work or don't want to work, yes. Because people who do want to work, people who are empowered to work do. It's not rocket science, it's really not rocket science. But anyway, y'all. So I I decided earlier this year that I needed to, because I knew when the Orange Demon got elected that it was gonna be a battle. I knew it was gonna be a battle for me as an activisty advocate, someone who's like got my foot in the door, but not all the way. I decided that I was going to really put a limit. I was gonna share. I've always been a sharer, like I've always been somebody who's cared about civic issues, so I'm always gonna share on Instagram and you know, whatever platform I have. And I've I've really never cared if I've lost people because I want you to know who I am at the at the at the start, at the start. You know what I'm saying? And what I stand for. And and with my podcast, I knew I'm not gonna ignore this stuff because then people won't follow me or whatever. Like, I I don't care. I I don't care. I'm gonna be who I am and stand for what I believe in. And if that means you don't follow, you don't follow. I don't see why not. But um, but one thing I am very passionate about is helping us as an advocate who cares about people like myself, who sometimes get very, very overwhelmed with all of these things, is helping us to learn how to navigate it, helping us to calm down in the middle of what feels like a crisis like this year. Not even this year has been this is this has been crisis. We we we're in crisis mode. We have someone who wants to be a dictator, y'all. Just the other day he was like, you know, the people want a dictator, they want a dictator. He said that the other day. Just FYI, the orange demon, was just like they'd rather have a dictator than violence, and I've shown that I can get rid of violence. He said this after Charlie Kirk was unalived. We just watched somebody get shot in their neck and blood pour out, talking about you can stop violence when it was one of your own people. Like, please shut the fuck up. Nobody wants a dictator. You, you know what? See, I'm getting mad just trying to tell y'all how I'm trying to calm down. We know that the constant the constant exposure is all this shit is not good for our soul, right? We know this, we're we know we're not meant for it. You know, back in the day, people know knew a hundred people, 150 people. You you knew who the dangerous people were, who to stay away from. You knew who the good people were, you knew who the protectors were. Now it's a fucking free-for-all, right? We don't know who the well, we do know some of them, but we know too many people and we're seeing too much, and our nervous systems were not meant for it. Our nervous systems were just not meant for it. We're not, and we're not meant to care. And I knew that every day when I used to be watching so much, not in 2025 in 2024, I was watching so much footage of the most aggressively documented genocide in history, and I realized like I can't, there's nothing I can change by continuing to watch this footage. I've seen so many kids without their heads on, so many half-bodies, so many moms screaming. I was following all of the you know Instagram accounts trying to support them, and um, I didn't unfollow, but I did try to change up my algorithm a little bit. I realized this is not going to be good for my soul, and because I can choose to come at this from a more sane place so that I can figure out what role I'm gonna play, who I'm gonna call. But when I'm just watching stuff over and over and over again, I can't even make the calls I need to make because I'm overwhelmed. I already got ADHD. I'm already struggling with administrative stuff, and I'm trying to do my part, and I can't even do my little part if I'm too laser focused on what the problem is. We know what the issue is. I hope I never see another beheaded children's body again. That was disturbing. Even watching Charlie get shot, I saw the some of the up close footage. It's disturbing, it's disturbing, and thinking about all of the children that this has happened to in schools in America recently, including the day that Charlie got unalived, and in Gaza constantly, children are being unalived like this. So we're not meant to see it. I know that it's happening, I'm staying aware, but I don't need to keep seeing it over and over again. And I just want to encourage you to turn some things off, especially images. If it says this real is a sensitive topic, don't click see why. Just take your ass on out of there, okay? Please do. I try to do resets every once in a while, and what that looks like is deciding that I'm not gonna look at any violent imagery. Um, I can still be aware of what's going on, and I also decide to um in some ways like take the weekends off, particularly Sunday. I think because I was in like, even though I'm not in Christian ministry anymore anymore, and I am in a I'm in a different place. I'll just say that. I'm not ready to fully say where I'm at, but I'm in a much different place. But Sunday was always like it was a very Christian y thing, like it's the day of rest, it's the Sabbath, and there generally is less going on with my kids as well. So I do try to see Sunday as more of a restful day. I try to see it as Sunday is a day for like self-love, self-care, and for connect reconnecting with friends, resetting, etc. So I try to see that as a day like just don't post about crazy stuff, don't look at crazy stuff, just reset, do more regulation, do like a longer, I try to do a longer, a much longer walk on Sundays because I walk for my uh mental health and physical health, but mental health especially, and try to focus on what I can control. I do breathing exercises, I do a lot of diaphragm diaphragmatic breathing. I don't know why that word is so hard to say. Uh, we do have more control than we think, and I think it's very easy to get lost in like this is also hard, I just can't control it. But like you can control your environment. And if you feel that sense of hopelessness, like I just can't, I just want you to know you can. You can actually control your environment and more than anything, your mental environment. Even if you feel like for me, I feel like my environment, having three kids is often something that feels even out of control for me because I can't physically control them all the time. I just can't. I would like to. I wish I could, I wish they were my little children robots, where when I said go clean up that mess, they just did it. But that's not the reality that I have. I guess you can judge me if you want, but that's not my reality. My environment feels totally at will to how obedient my children are to me and how obedient I am to myself. But anyway, y'all, so I am working on something right now to I'm not sure what I'm gonna call it. I'm just starting it. I just started doing more digital products, so I'm gonna be kind of like unloading more and more digital products. But one of them is like kind of like a three-day nervous system reset. I haven't named it yet, but I want to do something that is a kind of like a challenge for anyone who wants to take a challenge. Like, can I reset my nervous system in three days? And I might do something. Let me know if you're interested. I might do some sort of community thing where we like talk about it on a Discord channel or something like that. I don't know. But your piece is sacred. Even when things are super chaotic, like you can, and it's okay if you need permission, you can stop and reset. You can absolutely stop and reset. You can actually stop and just not know stuff for a few days. You can do a social media detox, you can do a phone detox for a weekend. That would be hard on a lot of us. I know for me, man, I'm addicted as hell. A whole weekend would be hard. I know when I get around people that you know I really enjoy being around, it's so easy for me to not look at my phone, but like by myself or like when I'm hanging out with my kids. Not that I don't love being with my kids, but like it's not as intellectually stimulating as being with our peers. Let's keep it real, okay? Keep it real, don't judge me. So if you are interested in uh the resource that I'm gonna create, I'm working on it right now. I literally just started yesterday or the day before, and I'm hoping to have something out by this week. It's not gonna be long because I don't want it to be another overwhelming thing, but just something that like addresses some of the things that have really, really, really worked well for me this summer. And I I can say, remember, I started the episode by saying, I'm in a really good place. I really am. I feel really good a lot of the time. Like I'm the stress from this, the catastrophe that the orange demon has unleashed upon this conversation. country has m I have managed to hold it in tension and still build a happy peaceful meaningful life for myself this year and still have grown have healed I've still been out here I dated a couple people good situations didn't end in drama I had a fun summer I hang out with my friends I hung out with my my kids I took them to six flags I mean it's just been it's been a good time and I have been aware the whole time of everything going on I've been sad I've been frustrated I've been at my wit's end at certain times but I have come back to center and reset a lot and so I wanted to create something because I'm like I think that my ability to do that is based on like I said before like a couple years worth of like really really really working hard at how to calm myself and how to quiet myself and how to go inward in a way that is healing. So uh I was like you know I'd like to share that so yeah I'm gonna create this ebook uh if you would like information on it sign up for my substack and you're gonna get an email about it as soon as it goes live. Um my substack I will link it below but it's always linked in the in my YouTube channel as well. So thank you so much y'all for being here today. I know you could be anywhere but you're here with me. If you haven't yet go pick up my book Grace actually Memoirs of Love, Faith Lost and Black Womanhood this is a collection of blog posts and memoirish musings from the last 10 years although this book is now um almost it's four years old I I'm ready to start a new one damn near please don't forget to like and subscribe and thank you so much for being here I appreciate you listening to me uh get angry rant and just do the absolute most today but you know what sometimes you just gotta let it out child you just gotta let it out so I'm so excited to kind of come back and try to keep doing this every week I I want to tell y'all I'm for sure gonna get out an episode a week but like I'm in graduate school FYI I am in my last semester I am due to graduate um December 15th 2025 so very soon which means I'm in the last classes that are very challenging I'm in my capstone class and I have research papers and things like that to do so it's been a struggle with between that and my three children and trying to make money to survive this podcast does not pay me this is my creative effort this is something I love doing this is something I would love to have pay me but as of yet it does not if you want to help me keep going please join my Patreon right now you know not to brag but I make at least$65 a month I mean it's really it's really not paying the bills but if you want to help me so I can keep doing this I would appreciate it. Anyway I will see y'all on the flip side bye
