Overwhelmed Working Woman: Boost Productivity, Master Time Management, Overcome Overwhelm & Stop People Pleasing
Are you sick of juggling a million things, and pleasing everyone BUT you?
What if I told you that you could achieve more and find your calm by doing LESS?
In this podcast for accomplished working women, discover where you're going wrong with managing your overwhelm and the exact steps to feel more composed and productive.
Tune in to learn unlikely time management hacks, tips to feel less overwhelmed, and surprising ways to do less with your host Michelle Gauthier, who has over 6 years of experience coaching hundreds of overwhelmed working women.
If you want to to start reclaiming your time, setting better boundaries, and nurturing your mental well-being, you're in the right place.
Get started by listening to fan-favorite episode "The Power of a To-Don't List."
Overwhelmed Working Woman: Boost Productivity, Master Time Management, Overcome Overwhelm & Stop People Pleasing
#125| How The Let Them Theory Will Finally Set You Free From People Pleasing & Overwhelm: Overwhelm, Productivity, Time Management & People Pleasing
Have you ever found yourself frustrated by someone’s actions, wishing they would just change? What if the key to peace of mind was simply letting them be?
We often waste energy trying to control or change others—whether it's a critical family member, an inconsiderate friend, or a coworker who never gives credit where it's due. This episode introduces the Let Them theory, a simple mindset shift that helps you focus on what you can control—your own response.
In this episode, you will:
- Learn how to reduce stress and emotional exhaustion by releasing the need to control others.
- Discover how to set boundaries without unnecessary conflict.
- Gain practical strategies to protect your peace while maintaining relationships.
Hit play now to learn how this one mindset shift can instantly free you from frustration and help you regain control over your emotional energy!
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Life can be overwhelming, but on this podcast, you'll discover practical strategies to overcome overwhelm, imposter syndrome, and negative self-talk, manage time effectively, set boundaries, and stay productive in high-stress jobs—all while learning how to say no and prioritize self-care on the Overwhelmed Working Woman podcast.
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If someone is doing something that you don't like, instead of getting upset about it, you're just going to let them do that thing.
Michelle Gauthier:You're listening to Overwhelmed Working Woman, the podcast that helps you be more calm and more productive by doing less. I'm your host, Michelle Gauthier, a former overwhelmed working woman and current life coach. On this show, we unpack the stress and pressure that today's working woman experiences, and in each episode you'll get a strategy to bring more calm, ease and relaxation to your life. Hello, friends, today we are going to be talking about the Let them Theory. If you have not read the Let them Theory, Mel Robbins' new book, this is going to give you a great overview of what the theory is and how it can apply to your life, and I'm even going to share with you how, reading this book before I went on vacation with my most darling handsome man friend from having so many silly, pointless arguments. It's just an amazing concept, and I'm going to tell you all about it. What I'm going to tell you today is how the let them theory can just instantly free you from stress and frustration, and it's super simple. Why so much of our overwhelm comes from wanting people to be different than they are Real life examples of how to use this mindset shift to stop overthinking, over explaining and overdoing for people who don't deserve your energy. And then I'm going to give you a simple, actionable little challenge that will help you take your power back and allow you to stop being overwhelmed and annoyed by other people's behavior. Sounds good. Right Before we dive in, I wanted to let you know that I am wrapping up the group coaching group that started in January and finishes up in April, and I'm going to be launching a brand new one, a new group of women for a 12 week program.
Michelle Gauthier:If you aren't familiar with it already, it's called the Good Life Group Coaching and it's for women who are high achievers and are feeling overwhelmed and want to learn specific skills like how to stop people pleasing, how to say no, how to create the life that you want to have. Each week you will get group coaching with me, as well as videos that you can watch on your own time. I designed this based on my years of experience working with one-on-one clients, and I have created videos that teach every single concept that I feel like is imperative to being able to change your life, to feel less overwhelmed. So, if you're interested in it. There is a link in the show notes where you can get on the wait list and then, as soon as I open group coaching, you'll be the first one to be notified. If you have any questions about it, you can just also use the message me link and ask me any questions that you have. I just wanted to give you a heads up on that so that you can start thinking about if that feels like a good fit for you.
Michelle Gauthier:Okay, let's get back to the let them theory. So, first of all, what is the let them theory? It's super simple. So if someone is doing something that you don't like, instead of getting upset about it, you're just going to let them. If your co-worker takes credit for an idea that you have, you're going to let them. If your mom has super strong opinions about how you should be raising your kids, you're going to let her, and instead of making it mean something about you you're not good enough, or you're doing something wrong, or they don't respect you or they don't like you. You just let them be who they are and then you decide what you want to do.
Michelle Gauthier:I'm sure the first thing that you're probably thinking is so I just let people act like jerks and I don't have to do anything about it. And yeah, that's correct, because let's just play it through. Let's use the example of your mom has a lot of opinions about how you should be raising your kids. Let's just say that your mom thinks that your kids are on their devices too much and she says something to you like you know, back in our day it was good for kids to be bored, and your kids are never bored and they really shouldn't be looking at their devices all the time. If you go down the path the opposite of let them, where you are trying to take that on, make it mean that you're a bad mom or you're doing something wrong, and then take it on to try to change her mind and explain how it's just different now and how you feel like you're doing the best you can, etc. Etc. The chances of you changing her mind or her behavior are just, first of all, not very likely and, second of all, not worth your effort. All you have to do is say I'm going to let her, I'm going to let her have that opinion, but we're not just saying forget about it, ignore it, don't worry about it. What we're saying is not just let everyone act like a jerk and just don't worry about it. It's very in line with everything we talk about on this podcast, which is put things into two categories things you can control and things you can't control. You can't control your mom's opinion, so just let her have it. You can control your own opinion and what you think. So after you say let them, so let her have her opinion, then you say let me, what am I going to do? So let me decide if spending time with my mom is good for me or let me decide that I'm not going to let her opinion bother me anymore.
Michelle Gauthier:Have you ever sent a really long, thoughtful text to someone and they just reply with a K and you're like oh my gosh, did I say something wrong? Did they not read the text? Are they mad at me? Should I clarify what I meant? No, you just let them. Just let them be a person who responds with just a K and then you get to decide Let me, let me keep engaging, let me just forget about this conversation, let me just notice that about this person. So I actually do know a couple of people whose text responses are very short. They might talk to you a lot more in person, but they're very short text responses and you can just choose to make that mean absolutely nothing. This one little mindset shift can save you so much mental and emotional energy.
Michelle Gauthier:Remember how I was talking at the beginning about how I had read this book right before I went on vacation with the handsome man friend and we're traveling through the airport. Keep in mind that I traveled for business for years and years Plus. I have a super efficiency focused brain, so everything that I do related to travel I pack very light. I know exactly where I'm going. I have TSA pre check, I know exactly the outfit I'm wearing. Everything for me is just boom, boom, boom done. That's how I travel.
Michelle Gauthier:He's kind of the opposite. He's not in a rush, he likes to do things slowly. His career has not required like a ton of travel like mine did, so he doesn't travel as much as I do. He doesn't like it like I like it. So as we're going through the airport and we're getting ready to go through security, he like pulls over to the side and he's like oh, just a sec, I got to reshuffle my stuff and get ready to go through security and in my mind I'm like, get ready to go through. What are you even talking about? Like I have everything exactly where it needs to be. I can just grab the things that I need and go through security. And then it hit me. I was like, let him reshuffle his stuff before you go through security. We had like another hour before our flight left. What did I care if it took five minutes for him to put things in different pockets and take off his watch and do whatever it was that he was going to do before we went through security? And then let me, let me just take a deep breath and relax and not make a big thing of it. So that's the kind of thing that could very easily turn into just bickering or some kind of unnecessary fight. But remember that you always have the power to just let them. Let it be. So.
Michelle Gauthier:Let's talk about why this works. So most of our stress and overwhelm when it comes to relationships comes from wishing people were different than they were. So you wish your friend would be more considerate, you wish your boss was more laid back, or you wish your boss gave you more positive feedback. You wish your sister was less judgmental. But you know this if you've been listening to this podcast and you know this from your life you can't change people. So trying to control them, explaining yourself, convincing them to try to see your side, waiting for them to act the way that you want, it's exhausting.
Michelle Gauthier:Okay, let's say, at work, your co-worker is constantly late to meetings and you aren't. So if someone has a question and she's not there, they're going to turn to you and so you feel like you have to pick up the slack for them. You have the option to get really annoyed and complain about it to your other co-workers and see them frustration every time you sit down on time and then she's not there. Or log in on time and she's not there. But if we apply the let them theory to this, you just let her be someone who's always late and then you decide do you adjust your expectations? Do you just know she's not going to be there till 10 minutes after the meeting starts? Do you set a boundary and say I'm not going to cover for you anymore if you're not there? I'm just going to say you'll have to ask Jennifer, I don't know. Letting them so letting her be late doesn't mean you're okay with it. It just means you stop being emotionally attached to it. You have no control over it, so you can just detach from that situation.
Michelle Gauthier:So here's how to apply the let them theory in real life. Again, it's so simple Just let people show you who they are and then just let them be who they are. So, for example, if you have a friend who consistently cancels on you, last minute let her cancel on you. And then you say, let me not schedule anything else with her. Or let me just roll the dice and schedule something with her, knowing that chances are that she might cancel. If you have a co-worker who always takes credit for your ideas, let them. They probably aren't going to start giving you credit. And then your part the let me is you're no longer going to be frustrated by it, but you get to decide. So do I want to talk to my co-worker about that? Do I want to talk to my boss about that? Do I want to speak up in the meeting and say actually that was my idea in the first place? And here's kind of what I was thinking in that area.
Michelle Gauthier:Another way to apply this to your life is just to stop taking things personally. Don't make it mean anything. If someone was really rude to you. Maybe they're just having a bad day. Just let them be rude. If someone doesn't reply back to a text or an email you sent them, maybe they're just busy. Just let them not respond. If someone judged your choices and told you something was a bad idea, chances are I feel like this is true like 90% of the time it's probably not about you at all. And so what if, for today, you just decide like nothing is about me and I'm just going to let people be who they are?
Michelle Gauthier:If you are able to focus on what you can control and use the let them theory, let them doesn't mean you have to accept bad behavior. It means that you recognize that the power is in how you respond. So, for example, let your mom judge your parenting and then decide if you want to change the subject or set a boundary. Let your friend cancel on you and then decide if you still want to make plans with them. When you stop wasting energy on trying to change people, you get your piece back.
Michelle Gauthier:So, in summary, the only thing that you need to do, and the main thing you need to take away from this episode, is that when someone behaves in a way that you don't like just let them. Don't take it personally, don't make it mean anything. Just release the need to control the way that someone else is responding and then decide how you want to respond, which is always in your control. And my do less for more success tip for this week is when someone does something that normally would stress you out, like pulling off to the side to reshuffle things in your pocket before you go through security, just let them. This one shift can free you from so much unnecessary frustration and exhaustion. Just give it a try and see how much lighter you feel, and I would love if you'd send me a message and let me know how this worked for you. So just a reminder that I am going to be opening group coaching and the signups will probably begin at the beginning of April. So reach out to me. Either get on the waitlist or send me a message if you have questions, but I would absolutely love to talk to you if you're interested.
Michelle Gauthier:It really is such a great program and it is such a fun and great way to be around other women who are also trying to change their lives. It turns out to always be the favorite thing. I take a survey at the beginning and say what are you nervous about? And people usually say being in group coaching. And at the end I say what was your favorite part? And they say the other people in group coaching and like the bonds that they end up sharing with these other women. So it really is so much fun. Okay, that is it for today. I hope you have a wonderful rest of the day and I hope that you just let them let everyone. Thank you for listening to the overwhelmed working woman podcast. If you want to learn more about my work, head over to my website at michellegauthier. com. See you next week.
