Heal & Grow with Nickie

36: A Conversation with Trista Polo

February 13, 2024 Nickie Kromminga Hill Episode 36
36: A Conversation with Trista Polo
Heal & Grow with Nickie
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Heal & Grow with Nickie
36: A Conversation with Trista Polo
Feb 13, 2024 Episode 36
Nickie Kromminga Hill

 With her upcoming book "Self-Love Shenanigans: The Awesome Journey to Unleashing Your Confidence," Trista unravels how to turn the quest for self-acceptance into an adventure rather than a chore, promising a read as engaging as it is transformative. Wrapped in the warmth of her candid storytelling, Trista shares how her strategies shaped her self-view and rescued her marriage—proof that the personal is indeed powerful. As the anticipation for her book grows, she extends an invitation to all: join the Self Love Shenanigans and Stories Collective on Facebook, a space for sharing and discovering the self-love stories that bind us in our mutual oddities and triumphs.

Our conversation culminates with a heartening reminder of the significance of voicing our experiences. Trista eloquently illustrates that regardless of where we are on our growth journey, we each have wisdom to impart. Her commitment to encouraging self-expression shines through as she acknowledges the collective healing and growth that emerge from the simple yet powerful act of storytelling. This episode isn't just about one person's path—it's a testament to our shared journey toward loving ourselves a little more each day.

Trista's website: https://www.iwokeupawesome.com/self-love-shenanigans?fbclid=IwAR0rt7NYcq7pd_p8gl7hG8I5DIt-LEn3dDh3nJs_zuhrMYM4tOfm1P5yYek

Trista's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tristapolo/

Trista's Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/tristapolo

Join Trista's private FB page, "Self-Love Shenanigans & Stories Collective here:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/selfloveshenanigans

The natural art site that Nickie was referencing: https://www.morningaltars.com/



Buy Me A Coffee: https://buymeacoffee.com/nickiekh

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/healandgrowwithnickie/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/healandgrowwithnickie/
Website: https://nickiekrommingahill.com/

*Purchase Nickie's book on Amazon! "Things I'm Thinking About; a Daughter's Thoughts on the Loss of Her Mom"
https://www.amazon.com/Things-Im-Thinking-About-daughters-ebook/dp/B083Z1PWKP?ref_=ast_author_mpb

Join my mailing list here: http://eepurl.com/g5hikj

*For speaking inquiries or for questions or comments on the podcast, contact Nickie at healandgrowwithnickiepodcast@gmail.com

Disclaimer: This podcast is for informational purposes only and should not be considered legal health or professional advice.

Nickie is not responsible for any losses, damages, or liabilities that may arise from the use of this podcast.

This podcast is not intended to replace professional medical advice.

Show Notes Transcript Chapter Markers

 With her upcoming book "Self-Love Shenanigans: The Awesome Journey to Unleashing Your Confidence," Trista unravels how to turn the quest for self-acceptance into an adventure rather than a chore, promising a read as engaging as it is transformative. Wrapped in the warmth of her candid storytelling, Trista shares how her strategies shaped her self-view and rescued her marriage—proof that the personal is indeed powerful. As the anticipation for her book grows, she extends an invitation to all: join the Self Love Shenanigans and Stories Collective on Facebook, a space for sharing and discovering the self-love stories that bind us in our mutual oddities and triumphs.

Our conversation culminates with a heartening reminder of the significance of voicing our experiences. Trista eloquently illustrates that regardless of where we are on our growth journey, we each have wisdom to impart. Her commitment to encouraging self-expression shines through as she acknowledges the collective healing and growth that emerge from the simple yet powerful act of storytelling. This episode isn't just about one person's path—it's a testament to our shared journey toward loving ourselves a little more each day.

Trista's website: https://www.iwokeupawesome.com/self-love-shenanigans?fbclid=IwAR0rt7NYcq7pd_p8gl7hG8I5DIt-LEn3dDh3nJs_zuhrMYM4tOfm1P5yYek

Trista's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tristapolo/

Trista's Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/tristapolo

Join Trista's private FB page, "Self-Love Shenanigans & Stories Collective here:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/selfloveshenanigans

The natural art site that Nickie was referencing: https://www.morningaltars.com/



Buy Me A Coffee: https://buymeacoffee.com/nickiekh

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/healandgrowwithnickie/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/healandgrowwithnickie/
Website: https://nickiekrommingahill.com/

*Purchase Nickie's book on Amazon! "Things I'm Thinking About; a Daughter's Thoughts on the Loss of Her Mom"
https://www.amazon.com/Things-Im-Thinking-About-daughters-ebook/dp/B083Z1PWKP?ref_=ast_author_mpb

Join my mailing list here: http://eepurl.com/g5hikj

*For speaking inquiries or for questions or comments on the podcast, contact Nickie at healandgrowwithnickiepodcast@gmail.com

Disclaimer: This podcast is for informational purposes only and should not be considered legal health or professional advice.

Nickie is not responsible for any losses, damages, or liabilities that may arise from the use of this podcast.

This podcast is not intended to replace professional medical advice.

Speaker 1:

Trista Polo has over 16 years experience as a business owner and entrepreneur. She coaches CEOs, managers, team leaders and entrepreneurs on self-worth, mindset, communication, leadership, teamwork and the soft skills needed to succeed. Trista is a published author, speaker, trainer and podcast host. Her mission is to help people win whatever winning looks like to them, because we woke up awesome just as we are, and we deserve all the best life has to offer. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. Snaps claps all of the hurrays for that. Trista, amazing, amazing, amazing. You are speaking my language.

Speaker 2:

Welcome to Heal Grow with Nikki. I'm your host, nikki Kraminga-Hill. Here we talk about everything grief, hope, illness, work, family, tragedy, possibilities, fun stuff and not so fun stuff. It's all on the table. Let's take a look at our lives and work to Heal Grow together. I'm so glad you're here.

Speaker 1:

Hi, welcome. Welcome to Heal Grow with Nikki.

Speaker 3:

So excited to be here.

Speaker 1:

So everyone, before we really get started, this was like a serendipitous meeting that happened. I feel like Trista, I don't know. Also, you're just a brave and courageous person, trista, and I actually do not know one another other than the 10 minutes we spoke right before this, right before we started recording. Trista found me through the Polkadot Powerhouse website and I've talked about Polkadot quite a bit on my podcast. You're a new dot, aren't you?

Speaker 3:

I am. I just joined my local chapter, which is Northern Chesapeake in Maryland, december. Just joined December, so just a couple months ago. You're a newbie.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, yay, yay, yay. I hope you find it as awesome and meaningful as I have, so tell everybody how you found me, because I think it's just super smart.

Speaker 3:

Well, I have this book coming out and one of the things that you want to do is to get the word out, because you could have the best book in the world, but if nobody ever reads it, then who knew? Right, so what was the point? So one of the ways is to get on podcasts and talk to like-minded people, kind of share audiences with people that are already out there sharing things that are similar. And so I went on to the Polkadot Powerhouse website. I logged in, I did a search and I just searched for the word podcast. And some people love podcasts, some people have podcasts and you know you get the information from their bio. And so I just started reaching out and saying, hey, I'm new to Polkadot and I'd love to connect, and I have a book coming out and if you consider me for your podcast, if I would be a good fit, I would love the opportunity. And you responded and here we are oh my gosh.

Speaker 1:

I remember I probably didn't respond this way in my email because I didn't know you then, but I was like, oh, hell, yes, I want to talk to this person. Okay, so many, so many things to talk about. First, trist's book comes out on Valentine's.

Speaker 3:

Day. On Valentine's Day, it's called Self-Love Shenanigans the awesome journey to unleashing your confidence. It's all about self-love. How could it come out on any other day besides Valentine's Day? It couldn't.

Speaker 1:

I it's, it's perfect and are in. This podcast will come out on the 13th. So, dear listeners, tomorrow you need to buy this book Self-Love Shenanigans the awesome journey to unleashing your confidence. Okay, I have to tell you this is another reason why I was a hell of a guess. One of my favorite words in the English language is shenanigan. Is that right?

Speaker 3:

I love that word.

Speaker 1:

Yes, I see it all the time. It's a thing at my work. We say shenanigans all the time, and so immediately I was like I must meet this woman that has shenanigans in the title of her book. Tell me why you picked that word.

Speaker 3:

I think if it's not fun, you shouldn't do it. I really like things to be fun. I think that it makes hard work easier. I think it makes things that you're dreading easier to do and you know you can accept and welcome them, and so I want it. Self-love is really a deep topic and it can get deep. It can. So I wanted to keep it fun and light. You might notice from my personality and the picture behind me is the cover I'm all about bold color. I've gotten louder, I've gotten older and stop being loud, and I just wanted it to be a fun experience. Some of the early readers have said that know me personally and know my personality. They've said it's like I'm talking to them. Yes, yes, and that's what I wanted. So it's fun, it's light and the information is really important.

Speaker 1:

I think I said that to you too, because I haven't read the whole book, but I've read parts of it and immediately I was like this person feels like, sounds like a friend, that's amazing, yeah, which thank you. That's just, I think, like just you who you are authentically, but also just like your speaker voice. Your writer voice is so friendly and so and I mean this as a compliment, non-clinical.

Speaker 3:

Yeah.

Speaker 1:

Because I feel like when we talk about these things, these important things like self-love, self-awareness, it's very easy to get into this mindset of being sort of a clinician. Yes, yes, being sort of a tunnel vision clinician, yes, and that's just personally not how I react with the world.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, and I want to say, since you said that I'm starting to interrupt, but it's important that I say I'm not a clinician, I'm not a social worker, I'm not a psychologist. It's written from my own experiences of what worked for me and I'm hearing from again early readers since it's not out yet that it is a lot of stuff that some of the people that I'm talking to have been through as well in therapy. In fact I just have to share no names. But a friend of mine texted me and said something and then I responded and then they went to therapy and got my text after and said you said in this text exactly what my therapist just said to me. So again, not a therapist, not trained in that way, but I've done so much work and research and reading for myself and these are the things that I know work and that have worked for me and that have worked for my coaching clients. So I just wanted to put that out there.

Speaker 1:

And then the person who goes to therapy, who's been going to therapy for 32 years. I felt like and I've had many different therapists throughout the years but I was like, oh, this is the therapist that I want in reading your book. Oh, that's awesome. Yeah. And again, that's in a non-clinical sort of way, yeah. And I think that's just the way in which you speak and what you talk about these really important things. You know, growth strategies for self care, which I love, because I feel like I feel like the term self care is sort of getting a bad wrap. And yet when I read your work, I'm like, no, this is all important stuff. This is easy-ish stuff to implement slowly into your lives. You know, I just I don't know. I'm just like a huge fan. You're gonna be your total fan girl and you're gonna be like great.

Speaker 3:

The feeling is mutual, by the way.

Speaker 1:

So tell us. I mean, there's so many amazing things to talk about in your book. One thing I want to get to you is just the word awesome. I know we already talked about the word shenanigans, but the word awesome comes up in your work not just your book, but in your work. In fact, you have a kick ass t-shirt on right now that says I woke up awesome. Look at that. I hope everybody else tried to put the video on for this one too, but if you don't see it, it's a dragonfly. And it says I woke up awesome because, hell yes, you did. You woke up awesome. You woke up complete, you woke up worthy.

Speaker 3:

Yes.

Speaker 1:

You know, and can we talk about that? For us Like just for sure. You have this assurance of yourself, and I'm going to guess, because you are a human being and a woman, you didn't maybe always have that assurance in yourself. Sure, now you're a guest. I woke up, awesome, and so did you Like. How did you get? How did you get to that place?

Speaker 3:

So, kurt, totally a journey, not a light switch.

Speaker 1:

Love that, not a light switch.

Speaker 3:

That's not a light switch, absolutely a journey I'm still on. I definitely have had lots of self worth issues over my lifetime. I remember that when I was in high school I ended up in a classroom with a bunch of football players. It was a small class, it was an algebra class and I've never been great at numbers and math and all that Same Z's.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, and I was like something weird, something weird going on with my butt, like I'm having a pain in my butt, but I was so not wanting to call attention to myself because they were football players in that stereotypical way and I was a band and drama geek in that stereotypical way.

Speaker 3:

So it's already not a cool kid yeah, I'm full of cool guys, I'm a woman, you know, girl, et cetera. And I just had this pain, but I refused to call attention to myself. I was so embarrassed about putting any attention on me that I sat there the whole class just like having this uncomfortable, you know situation. It turns out they had put a tack on my chair at the beginning of my life and I sat on that tack the entire class. And I think back, I was wearing jeans, which is why it wasn't super painful and it was like a pain I could survive. And that's just one example of a physical pain. I decided I could survive instead of facing it. But I have lots of that, you know so much childhood trauma, like we all do, sure. So I had a lot of self worth stuff growing up that I didn't deserve to actually take time from the teacher and take attention to myself for fear of being ridiculed. And it worked out in my favor. By the way, they never bug me about that, because if I was willing to sit on a tack the entire classroom, then don't mess with me. You know right, but they left me alone after that. But that's just an example of like I don't deserve To figure out what's happening that's hurting me. I'm just going to just be hurt because it's a pain I can survive, I can live through and you know, what doesn't kill us makes us stronger. And so all of the processes in the books and the classes and the things that I've done, a lot of journaling, has brought me to this epiphany.

Speaker 3:

One day I wanted to do a YouTube channel and I thought what do you have to say? You don't have anything to say. Who would want to hear from you? I have this, this thing, where I believe that my contribution isn't worthy, that it's sort of a it's a wonderful life, kind of like. What's the difference if I don't show up? Who's even here, that I'm not there? I don't have that anymore. You can't write a book from your words and feel that way. By the way, you have to believe you have some value to put out.

Speaker 3:

And I woke up one morning like who am I not to put out a YouTube channel Right now, in this moment? I woke up, I forgot to take my makeup off. I am, you know, my hair is disheveled, I'm just waking up, I have morning breath, etc. And I am still awesome just as I am. Yes, I have something to say.

Speaker 3:

And so then I woke up awesome, that's where that comes from, like it really came from, this epiphany, like right now, just waking up in this moment, I am perfect, just as I am, even in my imperfections, because I worked for everything I am and I I earned it through every experience that I've had. Now I still have self doubt and I still have worth issues and I still have all those things, and so what I want to share that I think is really important is that stuff never goes away. In my experience, and then the experiences of everyone I've spoken to, that stuff never goes away. The question is, when you have that thought like I'm not worthy or whatever, that thought is, what do you do next? Do you let that pile up and find evidence and talk yourself like a little motivational speech of how much you suck, or do you flip the switch and say, well, let's think of one small little thing that I could find right now, in this moment, that makes me feel like maybe I might be worthy, maybe, and then let that build and build up on that and create a motivational speech about positive yes, so that was kind of a long way around, but that's how the journey came, and when I moved to Maryland in July of this past year of 2023, I had to reestablish my business and I actually called it.

Speaker 3:

I woke up awesome, because that is who I am and who you are. You also woke up awesome. Every one of us is awesome, just as we are. In fact, I don't know if you can see it the back of my shirt Can you see the back of my shirt?

Speaker 3:

You woke up awesome, just as you are, so every time I see people on the street, when they walk by me or where they're walking behind me, they get a message and reminder.

Speaker 1:

Is that something I can buy from you off of your website?

Speaker 3:

Let's say yes, coming soon.

Speaker 1:

Okay, everybody, wow, we're gonna just put you on the spot, sorry about that. No, I love that. I realized we haven't even talked about your book at all.

Speaker 3:

I'm sorry, we have sort of there it is, there it is.

Speaker 1:

Okay, tell us about your book here. Okay, here are the takeaways. Everybody Increase self awareness. So if you read this book, you follow the activities you do, the journaling. Increase self awareness yes, who doesn't want that? We need that. Improve self confidence yes, please. I would love some more of that than their strategies for self care Thank you, because I need some of those and enhance personal growth. Obviously I'm here for that because it's part of what heal and grow and these are all things. That all four of these things are things that help me every day on my personal healing and growing journey. I think the self awareness is something that's kind of new for me. Maybe that's something that we get when we get a little bit older. I don't know. But I don't know All of this. So those are the four takeaways. Everybody buy this book. I mean, obviously there's way more than just these four things, but these are the four things you're going to get when you read Trista's book. Tell us about your book, trista. I want to hear about it in your own words.

Speaker 3:

I thought you'd never ask. I know because I like to talk. No, no, not that I'm going to tell you a secret. Writing a book is one thing. Promoting and publishing and putting the book out is a completely different set of skills, and I had no idea what I was getting into when I started, and so for the last few weeks I've just been talking to everybody I can about the book, because, again, if nobody knows it's coming, then how would they know that they want it? I'd rather get it, yeah, yeah. So it's gotten to the point where my mother invited me to something, an event that she's I don't know, sponsoring or something, and we went last year and it's March 10th or whatever it is, and she said so do you want to go to that? I'm like, does that have to do with my book being published in a week? No, then I can't talk about that.

Speaker 2:

I can't.

Speaker 3:

I can't talk about anything.

Speaker 3:

You can't talk about that right now, but if you want to talk about my book, I'm all in. So I guess what I want to say is that I took everything that has worked for me, put it down to its simplest form that I could and then shared it with strategies and tips and story of my own, so that it would be available in a lot of different ways, because everybody learns differently. It wasn't again a light switch, it wasn't one thing one book, one video, one affirmation that made the difference. It was like a building block of a lot of things that, when they came all together, along with my willingness to allow them in it, made the difference. And so the book is kind of like a resource manual. It has lots of different topics. It talks about forgiveness and failure and gratitude and affirmations and all kinds of things, and some of the stuff you'll be like gratitude I already know about that. Ok, great, maybe look at it with different eyes, because I actually have some pieces about gratitude in my book that I had never heard until I learned them, and when I implemented them, not only did they save my marriage during the pandemic, but it actually made me fall more madly in love with my husband, and we are already in a very strong 27-year marriage. Welcome, girls and sisters. Yeah, thank you. So it's really about lots of different ways to look at the relationship you have with yourself.

Speaker 3:

And you can read the whole book. You can open it to a chapter. I like to say don't read the book, be the book. And what I mean by that is you can read the words. They might impact you, so something might click. One of the things that I say in there might have a paradigm shifting effect, but if you read all the words and then put it down, you're not going to get the same level of effect as if you'd be the book. You actually do the activities at the end of each chapter which help you implement some practice of what we just talked about, the journaling questions I mentioned before. Journaling has been such a game changer for me, and so I wanted to include journaling in there as well. I've been told there's so much value of the being piece that I should create a workbook and a journal, and da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da da, because they could stand on their own.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, yeah, I mean, it's a great idea, are you? No, you are a part of another book. You've already written part of a book before.

Speaker 3:

Yes, I was a contributing author for a book called Abundance, volume One, and each of us just shared what abundance meant to us. It was empowering. It was an empowering experience because it allowed me to see myself as an author. Right, you know, these are my words and I have something to say, and it's valuable enough that it's printed in a book with binding and a number. It's a real.

Speaker 2:

An.

Speaker 3:

RSTN number Right, it's an official.

Speaker 1:

Oh, please, but this is like, this is your first. Do you say that this is your first book or do you say this is your second book?

Speaker 3:

I say that this is my first book and that I am a published author, Because the other book I'm listed as the but it's not my Sure Author page and yeah.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, oh my gosh, it's just terribly exciting. It's terribly exciting. It's terribly exciting, and you said something a minute ago that I want to touch back on. You said that the ideas and the concepts in your book are not necessarily original or unique, which of course, that makes total sense to me. But sometimes, when someone else says it differently, are you here Like I am absolutely into hearing about how gratitude helped you fall more madly in love with your husband during the pandemic. I mean, it's just, you never know how your personal story is going to touch another person, even if they already.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I've done the self-care, I've done the gratitude, I've done the journaling, sure, ok, but you haven't done it. Through this lens, just try it Like folks. I don't even know this woman and I'm like I kind of want to just hang out with you all of the time.

Speaker 3:

I'm in.

Speaker 1:

That's the power, that's the energy that you have, and I'm so excited to read the whole thing. What Is there anything that surprised you while you were writing this book, Like like, oh, I didn't, I didn't know, I felt this way about that. Or or, oh, I thought I, I thought I had um killed this thing with myself, but it's coming back up in this book. Or like, yeah, did anything just really surprise you?

Speaker 3:

Yes. So two things. First of all, I am one of those people that, because of whatever went on in my childhood, I don't have a lot of memories of my childhood. I can't remember unless it really had a very positive or very negative impact. I just don't have memories from my childhood. They're very sparse, and so there were things that I remembered happening as I was writing the book that came to the surface, that I didn't remember until I started writing it, and I feel like that kind of speaks to that. This has so much value for others and it was a healing journey for myself. If you ever think you might want to write a book, highly recommend it.

Speaker 3:

The second piece was not the writing of it, but the promoting and publishing of it. I am experiencing every chapter of this book as I am putting it out into the world Like failure. I've made mistakes, self-doubt is anybody going to like this book? Gratitude, flipping the switch, all the kinds of things that I have in the book. I've been able to repractice as I am putting the book into the world, and so much so that I've started. I have a private Facebook group that I created for people that wanted to get updates and things just kind of as a way to create the community and start the promotion of it, and I started doing lives Like up. Chapter nine showed up for me today I'm going to be my, you know, so it's just amazing that the I didn't expect the book to come up in my life so much while I was putting it out into the world. It's a surprise.

Speaker 1:

That's interesting. Yeah, I love that. I love that we're going to have to do a follow up with you in a couple of months, just about like like how did it go and how is it going, all that stuff?

Speaker 3:

Well, can I tell you my goal?

Speaker 1:

Yeah, what's your goal?

Speaker 3:

So my goal is I want to be a bestselling author. Yes, and I want this book to do that. So I'm real. That's why I've been doing so much getting it out there in the world. I feel like the word promotion has kind of a bad rap, so I think that's why I keep trying to say a different thing. But you know, promoting it and getting the word out, I really that's a goal of mine to be a bestselling author. I have a novel that I've written all but the end of and I really, when it's over, when it's done, I want to be like here's my novel, I'm a bestselling author, he's published it.

Speaker 1:

Wait, wait. What does what does it mean? Like actually, like logistically what? What do you have to do to be a bestselling author? Is that like so many copies sold and what is like? Is there an established benchmark for that already, or is it your personal thing?

Speaker 3:

Yeah, so it's so funny because it is not what you think. All right, so I'm just going to tell the I'm going to, I'm going to spill the tea.

Speaker 1:

Okay, great On what it is to be a bestselling author.

Speaker 3:

Okay, so I'm going for it. On Amazon yeah, so there are two different Amazon bestselling author things that you look at. New York Times is a completely different animal, okay, and that apparently almost have to know somebody who works for the New York Times or have your book published like a by a publisher that's well known to make it that way.

Speaker 3:

Okay, so I'm not doing that. So, amazon, you can be a bestselling author in two different ways. If your book goes to number one in one category, even for one second, then you're a bestselling author and you can claim that for yourself, and so that's the one thing, I'm an Amazon bestselling author.

Speaker 3:

I'm an Amazon bestselling author. My book made it to number one in at least one category Now, so that's what I'm going for on launch day. Okay, On launch day, my book is in, you know, multiple categories and I'm going to be having all those three categories up at the same time and just hitting refresh and refresh and refresh over and over so I can catch it and get the screenshot. Not if declaring when yeah.

Speaker 1:

Absolutely, oh, I am so into just like declaring what it's what it is, yes, yes.

Speaker 3:

If you then, for 10 days in a row, have a rolling average of the top 25 in any category like the same category, so if you have the top 25 rank in a category over a 10 day rolling average, then Amazon declares you a bestseller on Amazon and they'll give you a little label on the book page and I don't know, maybe they said your artwork. It's never happened to me so I can't say for sure but then they'll promote you as a bestselling author, as a bestselling book, as the bestselling book, and so those are the two pieces. So the first benchmark is hitting number one in at least one category in a day, or happen for five minutes, and then you know, go back down, and then the other one is the rolling average.

Speaker 1:

Well, how do we help you get that?

Speaker 3:

The best way is to buy. It's going to be on for 99 cents on Valentine's Day. That's my Valentine to you, heck. Yeah. Yeah, it's the Kindle version, so you'll be able to download it either on your Kindle or any smart device. You don't even have to have Kindle today to read an ebook from Amazon. So just a 99 cent contribution to my goal on Valentine's Day is the best way to help, okay.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I mean done like that's gonna happen and I'll link all of this stuff for for our listeners that they can get it to easily too. But, um, how are you feeling like? How are you feeling about all of this? I know you're excited, obviously.

Speaker 3:

I'm excited, I'm nervous. You know, I I'm like a, I'm like a spiritual skeptic. Okay. So I don't know if that's real thing, maybe I just coined it. But that's your next. Yeah, I'm writing it down Because the thing is, I'm very spiritual, I meditate, I journal, I believe in energy of all things. Yep, I earth, I talk to my spirit guides. I am a very spiritual person.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, what do you mean by I earth?

Speaker 3:

Oh, I earth. I walk around barefoot in the earth.

Speaker 1:

Oh, is that called? Is that called earthing?

Speaker 3:

or thing, or grounding it's.

Speaker 1:

Okay, sorry, sorry.

Speaker 3:

I was like no, that's fine, that's just yeah most people call it grounding, now that you mentioned it. But yeah, I call it earthing, but it's yeah, but the thing is, I'm very skeptical that it's actually really true.

Speaker 1:

Interesting.

Speaker 3:

I follow all of it, but my faith it wanes. Yeah, in fact, there's a story. I'll tell you. That's in the book. I Don't trust my gut. Hmm, I don't believe in, I don't believe that my gut has my back, because I don't believe that life has my back. That's my, my default setting. Life doesn't have my back, and so I was going through all of this process of growing and Expanding and falling in love with myself and I really wanted to trust myself, but I I didn't. And have you ever heard of muscle testing? Yes, okay.

Speaker 3:

Have you so for my people that haven't. It's where you like. Hold your arm up and then Somebody asked you a question and if they can push your arm down it's a no, and if they can't then it's a yes. Like your body answering questions, I was like I could fake that. I could totally fake that. And then and then, have you ever heard of using a pendulum to find an answer? I have heard of that. I have not done that. So so you have like a yes or no and you hold Usually it's a crystal or some sort of rock on a chain and you just hold it. So it's completely still, and you say show me yes, and you don't move. And all of a sudden it starts moving. Let's say left to right, yeah, and then you you stop it and then you say show me no, and then maybe it moves front and back and you stop it. Now you ask questions. If you goes side to side it's a yes, and if it goes front back it's a no. Well, I could fake that too, like I never believed any of that. Okay, so I Read a book that said you can get an answer from the universe.

Speaker 3:

Just demand an answer and then say how long you want the answer by, like I want to know this and you have 72 hours to deliver. I'm like great Right. It's like demanding of the universe yeah, so I said universe. Please show me with definitive, unwavering proof how I can trust my gut, yeah, how I can trust a yes or no answer. So I have never heard of anybody else that does this. This is why I'm laughing so. For many, many years now, if there's a question, I ask. If it's a yes, I yawn.

Speaker 3:

Okay and if it's a no, I gag. Wow, this is ridiculous. This is like who wants to be able to gag? But you know what? You cannot say that I am yawning to, I'm not faking. You can't really fake a yawn. You can fake like you're sounding like you're yawning, but the actual, a real one. Yeah, you can't fake a real yawn and you can't fake a real gag. Right, pretend to gag, but your body's not doing it and you can feel the difference and it's for me, it's like all in my throat, like right in the throat and upper chest area. God forbid, I get many questions that are nose in a row.

Speaker 1:

Very unpleasant.

Speaker 3:

Very unpleasant. But I have friends that will be just at lunch and they'll know this about me and I'll yawn and they'll say what did something? I just say give you a yes, should I? Should I do it, yawn and gag like no, I'm just tired. Yeah, yeah, yeah well, you know you yawn when you're low on oxygen too yeah.

Speaker 3:

So what's interesting, though, is, as I've become, as I've begun to trust, that it's gotten more subtle. So now, like I might not actually it might just be the thing you start to do in the back of your throat, so it's less unpleasant for the gag and less noticeable for other people, but it's just it comes back to like spiritual skeptic. I do not believe any of it, but I want it so badly to be true, and the more I believe it, the more power I have in the world and the more I can influence on purpose. We all influence everything all the time with our thoughts, which is why it's so important to love ourselves Right, right and have high self-worth, because we only get what we deserve. I always say your network or your net worth is limited by your self-worth. Yes, only ever have what you think you deserve to have Right, right. So as I have grown my self-worth and I have become less skeptical but I definitely, you know, I'm like ah, ah, ah, I don't know, there's that voice in the back of my head.

Speaker 1:

It's like, yeah, yeah, oh, that is fascinating to me, wow, okay, that's all. You have so many books in there, it's a whole.

Speaker 3:

I know it's a whole lot Two minutes and I feel like nobody else. I've never heard of anybody else that does that, so I'd be curious no, If you have any listeners that have ever done that or that if they know that Yon or Gag, please let us know To answer questions. Right, not because you had bad fish. You had bad fish.

Speaker 1:

Okay, yeah, it's terrifying If you just gag or Yon, because that's what your body's doing. No, thank you. I wanna know if it's a sign from the universe. That's right. Oh my gosh, that's hilarious. Not hilarious, it's just really.

Speaker 3:

It's hilarious, it's weird, it's ridiculous. Chapter one of my book is Be Weird, it's your super top.

Speaker 1:

I loved that. I loved that because I think so many times we're like, oh, I'm sort of strange, I sort of don't fit in here, and then we try to cover it up and it's like, no, just be your weird self, that's right, I put the world, because that's right, absolutely.

Speaker 3:

It makes you unique. But the other thing is, if you are, you think people don't know your weirdness. It splits out. They know. So if you own it, they can respect you for it instead of using it against you.

Speaker 1:

Yes, yes, yeah, that's why I'll make a joke about myself before anyone else can. I'm already aware of. I know I know about this. Yeah, so I get to own it. I get to control the narrative and you don't get to. That's right.

Speaker 3:

I actually have a question for you, yeah. You said about grounding or a thing. Is that something that you do Like? What's your experience with it? I haven't. Should we tell people what it is?

Speaker 1:

Well, I've always thought that grounding was just well like how you described, like really just being outside with your shoes off, in nature, in the dirt, in the graph. The closest experience I've ever really had to that is I'm thinking of the brand name right now and that's making temporary Earth art. There's this organization I took some classes through called Morning Alters, and it talks about how to use what's in nature to create art like sticks, leaves, flowers, branches, whatever, and even asking it permission, like may I use you? And then creating art like for healing, for grieving, for celebrating, and so that's not really grounding, but that's kind of my take on it.

Speaker 3:

I love that.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's really cool. I think he just calls it Earth art.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, I wrote down the name Morning Alters, I love that Good morning.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, and I've taken his classes and I've made several things just like in my backyard, like whatever cool thing to create with, yeah, so that's sort of my version of grounding.

Speaker 3:

I love that.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, it's really cool. Check it, look into it, and I could put that in the comments for the show notes for this episode too, so that other people can check it out.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, for sure.

Speaker 1:

OK, so you have a big day on Wednesday.

Speaker 3:

I do.

Speaker 1:

All going to buy your book. We're all going to give it five stars and leave a review, and we're all going to share it with other people so that it reaches as many people as possible. Can I make?

Speaker 3:

two requests. Absolutely, you can, ok. So the first thing is I'm creating a community around the book and so that is on Facebook. Can I share where Please? Ok, great, so it is called the Self Love Shenanigans and Stories Collective. Oh fun, I think if you just type in Self Love Shenanigans, it should come up and Stories Collective.

Speaker 1:

OK, I'll find that and I can link it.

Speaker 3:

So that's the first thing, and what was the second one? I don't even know I do. Ok, sorry, brain came back. So the second one is you are excited to read the book and you've produced it already and you said you thought it had great value. But you have also had moments where you have fallen more deeply in love with yourself, right? Yeah, because you're on the journey too.

Speaker 3:

Yes, I want this to not just be about me and my journey and I didn't feel like I could share clients' journeys because confidentiality I just didn't feel comfortable with it without going and getting everybody's permission and all that stuff. But what I have created is called the Self Love Stories Collection and I'm asking for people to share a two to three minute video about how you have fallen more deeply in love with yourself. Like, what was the catalyst? How did it occur? Why did it occur? What's possible for you now? What was the outcome? I have it all on my website Awesome. But I think it's just so important that we all share our personal journey and stories because, who knows, hopefully my stories will make a difference for people, but I know that your story probably would too. Yeah, and it's not about this is a book I read and here's what I read about it and here's what the book is about and here's why I love the book. It's like I read this book and this is what's possible for me now.

Speaker 2:

And it's a good thing.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, so if anyone resonates with that and would like to share a story, we're still collecting them right now to put together in a special collection, a digital book collection, where all the videos will be put together.

Speaker 1:

Yes, I want to be part of that.

Speaker 3:

Absolutely Great. It's part of what I'm sharing with people who registered for the journey of the book coming out, but of course, everyone who's part of it will get a copy as well.

Speaker 1:

This is amazing. I love the community that you're creating, that you've created. I mean, I'm just loving. I'm sort of dancing in your chair right now. I'm dancing, I'm just really having a dance party. I'm just this is all fantastic. I'm going to link everything in the show notes. I'm so excited for you, I'm so proud of you for just showing up awesome all of the time and saying I've got a voice. And here's my voice because people are going to resonate with you. I already do resonate with you.

Speaker 3:

Thank you.

Speaker 1:

Yes, thank you Everyone. Please go out and get a copy of Trista's book Self-Love Shenanigans the awesome journey to unleashing your confidence. And, trista, thank you so much for being here with me today.

Speaker 3:

Thank you, Nikki. This has been amazing, and one last thing I want to say is I am only maybe one step ahead of other people on this journey, which gives me something to contribute, and you, the listener, is probably only even one or five steps ahead of others. So even if you're not sure that you know enough to share your journey, start sharing it anyway, because there's something out there that will really be able to take to heart and it can make a difference for them.

Speaker 2:

And you may never know that.

Speaker 3:

No one that made a difference, but it's still big.

Speaker 1:

And it matters. You got to share your story. I love that. All right, thank you so much for listening and, as always, thank you for healing and growing with me, mwah.

Speaker 2:

This podcast is for informational purposes only and should not be considered legal health with professional advice. I am not responsible for any losses, damages or liabilities that may arise from the use of this podcast. This podcast is not intended to replace professional medical advice.

Exploring Self-Love and Personal Growth
Author's Book and Personal Journey
Promoting and Publishing a Book
Embracing Weirdness and Self-Love Stories
The Importance of Sharing Your Story