Nothing But Anarchy
"Nothing But Anarchy" hosted by Chad Sanders explores and subverts sports, media, Hollywood, and culture. Chad's vulnerable and raw commentary creates a fresh podcast experience you don't want to miss. Tune in Tuesdays and Thursdays at 12PM ET on Youtube Live.
Subscribe to the "Nothing But Anarchy" Youtube channel for full interviews and more anarchy!
Game analysis, social commentary, and music.
Instagram: @chadsand
Executive Producer: Chad Sanders
Producer: Morgan Williams
Music: Marcus Williams
Nothing But Anarchy
Eps. #47 The Risk of Certain Visible Careers, Travis Hunter Hit, and Tyler Perry's Dating Advice
The journey of certain careers at a high level come with a lot of risk of backlash as well as opportunities. Speaking of backlash, remember that slap heard around the world with Will Smith and Chris Rock at the Oscars? And then there's the world of dating, particularly for Black women. Tyler Perry's advice to them about dating men with less money seems oversimplified. Our producer, Morgan (an actual Black woman) chimes in on this one with a simple message, stop telling Black women what to do.
Join me on this exploration of the chaos in our world, and the world within us. Let's question, learn, and laugh together as we navigate through the complexities of life.
0:08 Life update & Lena Waithe
11:16 College Friends and Finding Expression
14:53 Seeking Creative Help for the Show
20:33 Teyana Taylor and Iman Shumpert break up
25:45 Sports, Entertainment, and Persona Intersection
33:12 The Challenges of Being a Comedian
40:46 Instagram, Celebrity Identity, and Awards
50:49 Perry's View on Black Women Dating
1:07:24 Jealousy and Pursuing Dreams
Tune in Tuesdays and Thursdays at 12PM ET to watch the show live on Youtube. Follow @chadsand on Instagram and subscribe to the Nothing But Anarchy Youtube channel for full interviews and more anarchy!
Executive Produced by: Chad Sanders
Produced by: Morgan Williams
This is Nothing but Anarchy. This is the show that explores chaos around the world, around culture, around sports, around media and some other stuff. I think that'll do just nicely for an intro. Welcome to Nothing but Anarchy. This is the show that explores chaos in music, sports, entertainment, media, friendships, brunch.
Speaker 1:I'm in Brooklyn wearing a new shirt. I, as some of you all prayed for I bet some of you all, people who I've known for a very long time, when I started doing this show on camera, I bet some of you all thought Chad is not going to have enough clothes to be able to have a different outfit frequently on this show. And indeed you are right, I didn't and I don't, but I can buy new clothes and I did that, so I have on a new shirt today. We got a lot to talk about. It's Tuesday. I always come in here on Tuesday with many, many thoughts from a long weekend or from a long time away from the show. I should say when was I? I was at a grown up kickball game this weekend. I was in the Lower East Side on Friday night I need to tell y'all where I was at, but I was out. I was out all weekend pretty much. I watched football on Sunday at Tim's house. He gave me he made spicy meatball sliders and it's just, I just can't, it's just no way, there's no other way. If you go to Tim and DeLisa's house, they're going to feed you spicy, delicious food. You're just going to eat actually went to the Bodega, or I went to like this little market by their house on Sunday because I knew I was going to be in there eating meat and cheese all day and I just came back with a, with a crate of just broccoli, just raw broccoli. Cause I was like I'm not, I'm not doing this with y'all. I'm not coming to your house for 18 weeks of football and then four weeks of playoff football and just eating meat and cheese every day, without any vegetables. My stomach can't handle it. I'm going to be waking up at 4am every single day that I come to your house. So I got broccoli and I ate it out the crate and nobody would eat it with me and they judged me and here's what. But here's what I'm actually here to talk about. So a couple, a couple.
Speaker 1:It's always interesting that you know, outside of the show I interact with many of the people who listen to this show. Some of them I know in real life, like I've known them my whole life, basically my sister, who I've known since I was born. My god brother, jonathan, who I've known since I was born. Then I got friends from who listened, who I've known since I was six, from church, basketball, cub Scouts. Then I got friends who I've known since middle school and high school, who I still talk to almost every single day, if not every single day, and one of them he said something. He said two things that were very interesting to me, and you know I hope I'm not breaking the confidence, but I'm not going to say who it was, but I mean, it's. None of this is like anything embarrassing or private, but he said two things. One thing he asked me something I'm going to come back to, but he asked me if I had ever watched the show. The show, the shy, and then in the same is all via texting, basically. And then he says if you haven't, before I've answered, he says, if you haven't, is it because you tried it and you didn't like it, or is it because the head writer of the show is your competition? And that was in reference to Lena Waithe, and it's interesting, this guy's known me a long time, he knows I think everybody knows I can succumb to competition or the feeling of some of competition. Anybody that knows me knows If we play a game, we play a board game, if we play a sport.
Speaker 1:A couple of friends have offered for me to join this adult kickball league and my response is generally like I can't, like I can't do the kickball league and then not be obsessed with winning the kickball league. And that takes. That doesn't just that doesn't just mean on kickball days that I'm going to be locked into kickball. It means that kickball is now going to be a part of my life. It means like I'm going to be thinking about kickball strategies in the shower. It means I'm going to be getting. I'm going to be trying to understand the idiosyncrasies, idiosyncrasies, whatever. I'm going to be trying to understand what makes my teammates tick and our opponents. I'm going to be trying to find psychological advantages. I'm going to be so locked into winning the kickball league. If I have a bad game, it's going to sit with me all week. If I have a good game, it's going to fuel me all week.
Speaker 1:I can't just put my toe into kickball. It's a co-ed professional, you know, like black people. Who are these nice, you know these nice Brooklyn black people that be out here all over the place with natural hair, like these niggas, right and good people, right, like they got nice jobs and they're friendly to each other and they have barbecues and shit and they go out with each other and stuff. And if you, if you enter me into that with an objective which is to win, I am not playing nice guy about the thing. If the thing is about winning, that's just not. I've tried to change that about myself and it's not changing. So I excuse myself from kickball, but I am very interested in kickball.
Speaker 1:I'd be asking them all kinds of questions about the strategy. What position would I play? Where would I be on the field? What do you do when this happens? What are you doing that happens? Whatever, kickball aside, my friend was trying to. He was asking a provocative question and he knew that he couched it by you know more or less telling me it was a provocative question.
Speaker 1:But a couple things sprang to mind. One is I know Lena Waithe. Lena Waithe was one of the first people who was like all the way in, who sat down with me for coffee to just kind of like shoot some game to me, and there was nothing in it for her, and she's always been the first person to reply. She replies to a text like quick as hell. I've already said this before. She replies to a text like nobody else in entertainment. Right, she's present, she's there, she's real with you.
Speaker 1:I asked her a while ago to come on this show to talk about the strike and she was very real. She was like hey, I'm in London right now. I'm working on something. I don't really want to talk about the strike because of the place that I'm at in my career. It's not really fair for me to talk about the strike when other people are hurting right now. In her own words, she said this and she said but I'll come on and talk about something else. And so I got her. We need to remember. I need to like hit her up today, probably, but anyway, the point is, lena Waithe has been the three people who I was like looking at coming into this Donald Glover, issa Rae, lena Waithe, issa I have some relationship with because we worked together and she came on direct deposit. Obviously I got to, like you know, be on set with her and be in the writers room with her, all that stuff. But I don't have Issa Rae's number, we don't. We don't kick it, you know what I mean. But but she's good people. I've never met Donald Glover.
Speaker 1:Lena, I feel like I know. When I see her, I feel like I'm seeing a friend that I know. Right, I've been, I've been out to. You know, sit down and coffee with her. I ran into her at Culturecon last year and we had a little moment and you know, she got to tell me she was proud of me because she's seen the whole, she's seen the whole arc right, I saw her at Sundance and I got to see, honestly, I got to see how much women love her.
Speaker 1:At Sundance I saw her like dancing around with a grill in her mouth. I don't think she drinks, no drink, but I just saw women. I heard a woman, actually a woman came out, a white woman came over to me. She sees Lena Waithe dancing in the we're at the macro party at Sundance. She sees Lena Waithe. I'm I like a party, I don't like a networking event, but I will go to a party. Lena Waithe is dancing. She got a grill in her mouth. She's just. I think she's just cut her hair and she's got like the blonde, she looks like a golden lord from Meteor man and there's just like women you can feel the energy of women trying to get closer and this white lady pulls up to me next to the bar and she's like she's looking at her and she's just looking at her and she's almost like, she's almost like flusting over her and she's like, ah, I don't know if I want to fuck her, if I want to be her, and I was like, damn. So anyway, that's Lena's effect on women.
Speaker 1:But the point is I have always, I guess, aspirationally, thought of those people as people that I want to be like. It's not, I mean, it's like it's a fool's errand to think of those people as competition. It's a fool's errand to think of anybody as competition who doesn't see you as competition, I think. But I've always wanted like those people move in a way that I aspire to like they get their projects off, they have sway in industry, they have all these entrepreneurial ventures. They hustle, they're smart, they I think I think you know sort of what you're going to get from each one of them, even if your taste doesn't like what they make. Like their name stands for something, they have a brand. They're like their name is a brand name and this was the first time anybody had ever suggested to me be one of them as competition.
Speaker 1:And that was meaningful to me because this is a friend who I've known my whole life. He's blunt as fuck. He tells me what he thinks. I know that what he thinks, generally speaking, comes from a real place, like he's not blowing smoke, and he's never somebody who talks to me or treats me, you know, special, like I'm any, like I'm somebody, so that was meaningful. Then the next thought on that was he was talking, he was he was speaking to. He said he's surprised how honest I am on this show sometimes. And it was related to this conversation about Lena, because I was just saying he was just like, yeah, I've never heard you mention her, blah, blah, blah, whatever. And part of why I've never mentioned her is because she has been that part. Like I'm quick to talk about somebody who shaded me. I think I'm real quick to like tell y'all how I feel about somebody who kind of gave me a cold shoulder, but I'm, I'm, I'm a little sweeter, I'm a little thoughtful when I talk about spike. I probably am that way about Issa Rae in some regards, like I'm that way about anybody who I thought like, treated me humanely during this process. But he, as someone who knows me, he was suggesting that I steer into the spicy stuff on purpose as entertainment, and what I was telling him was that it's a, it's very, there's a catharsis, there's a, there's a release that I feel from podcasting if that's what we call this like, from doing this particular job, because I get to be honest in ways that decent society does not generally support. Honesty like or does not want honesty, does not, it doesn't appreciate. I have been that guy.
Speaker 1:My college friends. I was sitting around with my college friends one time in LA. I used to go visit my ex-girlfriend when I was like, trying to still make that happen when I was in my early 20s. I used to live in the Bay, we would drive down. I used to live in Oakland, we would drive down to LA. She was down there at film school and we would kick with our friends from college and one of them, courtney shout out, courtney C-Dubb, she, she was one.
Speaker 1:You know you have those friends who are like on that next like layer of. They're those friends who like whenever, when you're all out at a party and everybody's drinking and drunk and it's loud or whatever. They'll kind of like they'll get beside you and you'll kind of lock in like you're in a little phone booth together and they kind of tell you some things that they know that you could see, like they have observed these things about you and like they give you they're giving you a little gift of like I see you right, and Courtney's that friend, but she was that friend that time in your life, though, early 20s. Drinking at brunch like is also treacherous, because everybody's so angsty and has all these feelings that they haven't processed about each other and whatnot, and it's just like. It's like it's intimate and it's nice because you get to vibe with people who see you, but it's also dangerous because sometimes they say something that hurts your feelings, like maybe on purpose, maybe I accent, I don't know but we were playing this game.
Speaker 1:The game was let's go around the table and we're all going to decide who. We're all going to decide, like what celebrity each person is. That was the game we were playing in Los Angeles. This is so cliche A bunch of like aspiring, like writers and directors and stuff, whatever. So, courtney, but it was cute and people would deliberate over the person as we got to each person and it would be like, hmm, you know, oh, I think this person is like I don't know Vin Diesel, like I don't know this person's Mariah Carey, but it would be like some debate and some jostling and then, when it got to be my turn, when the focus came to me, courtney just like blurts out immediately she's like he's Kanye and everybody kind of, was everybody kind of like, hmm, yeah, he is Kanye, and this was pre-spiral, right, this is before slavery was a choice and all that other shit.
Speaker 1:But like it was one of those things where it was like, as a Kanye fan, I wanted to love it and think of it as a compliment, but I knew it was not meant as one. I knew it was meant as he is the person who will say the thing when it is inappropriate to say the thing, and it will drop like a fucking dead fish on the table and make everybody uncomfortable, which was true of me at that point in time. I think I have done some work to like find vessels of expression for those things and this is one of them. Like this is where I can say the thing that I'm not allowed to say at brunch, because you can't just like, you can't just tee off on people with the truth or with your honesty, like you just can't do that. You know what I mean. You can't be sitting in the crib with two friends. You know who are, you know maybe they're a couple and they're sorting something out, and you feel like you have something to say. You can't just like levy that into their life. So the thing that is druggish about this thing that I do right here and in a much slower and more torturous way, writing, but in this thing, this is like the heroine shot of this thing, this is like the fucking, this is the Molly pill of this thing.
Speaker 1:All these feelings and like thoughts that you walk around with that you are not allowed to say out loud unless you want to bear the risk of what happens when you say these things out loud in real life. Those thoughts, some of them are not even fully formed for me, those feelings, until, literally until we turn the microphone on and start the show, and then I go down this list, this docket in front of me, and I see, item by item, and it's asking me, like to have a clear point of view on Something and I get the point of view once we do the show, like the point of view Comes to me because I'm like here I am twice a week. I am supposed to be honest. I have to be honest or else it's not gonna work and it's not good and I'm not gonna get the drug feel like the. The drug feeling is the honesty like shooting up through your body. It's like all these you ever I've talked to the drug addicts about this thing, which is like they always knew, even as kids, there was something.
Speaker 1:There was like some fish hook that just wasn't hooking them about life. There was like just this thing where they're like it wasn't coalescing, like there was this. It was like they needed something to go Through them, to like pull their whole being together and then when they found their right drug, that was it, that was the thing that they were missing their whole lives. And you can only imagine, once you feel that feeling, you're gonna want to keep feeling that feeling over and over and over again and like that's what this does for me. It's like it gives me not even just permission, but like a mandate to have my point of view Twice a week on all this shit. So that was my conversation and I'm glad y'all talked to me about the show in my real life because it gives me. It gives Me things to think about and it gives me stuff to do here.
Speaker 1:Also, I was supposed to say we have an event next week. We have a party in Greenpoint at Pony Boy. It is the nothing but anarchy launch party. You can you can RSVP at the link in my Instagram bio or you can email us at nothing but anarchy pod at gmailcom. Also, we are looking for artists to do merch designs for us. We have gotten one submission which is very strong, but we're looking for more people because I think we're gonna probably be rolling out new merch forever, like throughout the course of this thing, and you can email us if you want to be considered for that, or you can DM me or Morgan or whatever. Just reach out to us somehow.
Speaker 1:We need more artists. We need we just need more creatives around the show period. Okay, so we've built the foundation. Here we are at episode 47. We exist in many different dimensions podcasts, amp, reels, tiktok, like we're everywhere now. And now that we've built the foundation, we know what the tone of the show is. We know sort of what the spirit of the show is.
Speaker 1:Now we need creative people and I'm doing this because I've been coached to do this, like I'm always like. Let me finish my sentence. We need creative people to help us continue to build the castle up. We got the first level on on. We got it to a good place. Now we need y'all to help us build it up into the sky, and now we need it. We need you to help us design the windows and the fixtures and the floors and the ceilings and all that other stuff. I've gotten the feedback from smart people who I look up to or over to Yo. When you need help, just ask for help. You have so many vehicles to ask for help. There are people around you who want to work with you. So raise your hand, tell them you want to work, like so. So this is me saying I want to work y'all. If you're out there and you're creative, if you like this show, if you know someone who likes this show or is creative like, come fuck with us. All right, I'm playing music, I come back and we're talking about Eman Shumpert and Tiana Taylor.
Speaker 1:Okay, morgan gave me a note to call out that I did a little name-droppy-droppy there in that whole segment. What was the name drop, though? Oh, lena, lena Waithe was the name drop. Yeah, I mean, what are you gonna do? What are you gonna do guys? I know famous people. No big deal, I'm just kidding, but I'm not. It's weird, man. It's all very strange. It's all strange, it's. It's. It's unusual to me, it's unusual to the people in my life who are close to me. None of us know how to navigate it, and it is what it is, okay. So here comes more name-dropping.
Speaker 1:I learned in the news that Eman Shumpert and Tia in the news what does that even mean? Morgan told me that Eman Shumpert and Tiana Taylor split up after seven years of marriage, and here's, here comes the name-drop part. Right, I was driving around Los Angeles with a friend, maybe four or five years ago, and he was like I had, I was there, for I don't even know why I was in LA. I was there for meetings. And he's like hey, you want to? I got to go to Tiana Taylor and Eman's house. Do you want to? Do you want to come? And I was like yeah, and he takes me to this Quite beautiful house, I don't know what part of LA I really don't usually know what part of LA I'm in, but a fancy part and we walk inside. I'm thinking he's like he's oh, he said they're having a cookout, that's what he said. I'm thinking we're gonna walk into something with like 60 people in it and we walk into this very beautiful house with expensive cars outside, giant artwork on the walls, like crazy shit that I don't know. Art like that, like visual art, so I can't tell you who wrote, who made it or what it looked like, or whatever. I could tell you what it looked like, but not important. And we walk inside and it's.
Speaker 1:You know, one of these houses that has the kitchen, is wide open to the rest of the living space, humongous living room with big-ass TVs. There was a Basquiat on the wall, a huge one, and then there's probably eight other people in there and Two of those people are Teyana Taylor, who has on a sweatsuit and is very much in host, mom, hosting mom mode, like serious, like not fucking around. That kind of seems like her vibe anyway. But like not fucking around, like serious, and like hey, how are you doing? Welcome to my house. You know that kind of vibe?
Speaker 1:Um, emon Shumpert, who is giant, just a giant person, y'all like these guys. He's a shooting guard in the NBA. Like a shooting guard in the NBA is like the biggest person you will meet, like tall as hell, wearing, I think, like a black hoodie and black pants. I could be totally making that up, but I know this detail for sure. So first, okay, there were a few other people there Victor Cruz and and Karoochi were there. Karoochi was obviously like completely paralyzing to look at in a good way, and Then there were probably like four other people there the mother Teyana Taylor's mom, I believe was one of them and then their adorable, precious baby daughter, who was like Maybe four and had floaties on and was jumping in and out of the pool and the back door, like the back Panel of the house comes off so that you can walk straight out to the pool and then there's a big projector screen. They're watching the BET cipher.
Speaker 1:This will tell you around the time that it was and the bait the baby was in the BET cipher and everyone was talking about how cold the baby was and how, like you know, new and just like good he wasn't rapping. That was. That gives you a sense of when it was, and then, after that goes off, the story is almost over because nothing that interesting happened, except that obviously I felt Totally angsty and didn't know where to sit or who to talk to or anything, and my friend didn't help at all and I was just kind of like nobody knows who I am, you know like nobody, none of these things knew me, so it's just like I. That's the thing. That's like the commentary on being like a famous celebrity person is and I've seen this in other people's lives he didn't Julie's life, I've seen it in like there's always just strangers in your space and I think a lot of it is because People want to bring creative people around. Those folks for the same reason is what I just tried to do, which is like there's always kind of like Some synergy of an opportunity and a need that's floating around and maybe you can be the person that fills the need.
Speaker 1:But I Could have been any fucking body. I could have been, I could have been a spy, I could have been a journalist, I could have been like and I'm just like in their house next to them. Their baby was there and I I remember E-Mond was listening to this music and it was and I was like, and it was hip-hop. I didn't do a good impression, but it was like and I Thought, cuz I know E-Mond Shumber raps, I thought it was his and I was like, damn, that's really good, like this thing is getting really good with it, with the Wrapping. And then it turned out to be pop smoke and it was my first time also ever hearing pop smoke.
Speaker 2:That actually wasn't a bad impression. I knew oh you know, did you know?
Speaker 1:I wish I had pop smoke voice as my normal voice. Pop smoke to drill buttons, but that is all to say that the first time I ever heard pop smoked music was on E-Mond Shumpert's, like Bose speakers. And no, the real point of this is like they said some stuff that is very important to me and meaningful as a couple that is around my age. They said despite their breakup and who knows what's actually happening, this is PR.
Speaker 1:I know I get it, but you know, despite what's going on with them and they're split up, like, they're still best friends, they're gonna stay friends, they're gonna be parents to their baby, daughter like, or however many kids they got, and I just think that More on this later but I think breakups are have more dimensions available than how we treat them, how we talk about them, how other people almost like people outside of a breakup, almost like the expectations that people have for folks in a breakup, like there are just as many people as there are in this world and as many couples there are, that many different types of a breakup. Is is my opinion and I thought it was really cool and really mature and just special, like just a good example For these two young black folks. I hate to do the like black people being a good example thing, but like it is. It's like these two young black folks who seem to have Positive things around them, to seem to, who seem to be good people. You know. I mean, like I got a good vibe in their house, I what do I know? Like I met them for two seconds, but I just like that. It doesn't have to be beef, it doesn't have to be slandering each other in the media and trying to win the breakup and all this other shit. So I thought that was dope.
Speaker 1:All right, moving on, and here's the segue I'm gonna use, because what we're gonna talk about next, hold on first music, cuz I need to sip my water, and then we're gonna talk. So just hold your freaking horses, please, please. All right, so I'm gonna read to you all four headlines and I'm gonna tell you what I believe to be the through line on them. But there's nuance, okay. So my favorite team, nfl team, the Vikings. We're 0-2 right now. We weird. We play the Chargers next week and the Chargers are also 0-2. Somebody's walking out of that game 0-3 and that pretty much means your season is over. In the NFL we have 17 games per team, so it's really tough. It's really start out. It's really difficult to start off 0-3 and make the playoffs.
Speaker 1:I think both we and the Chargers came into this season with playoff expectations. I still do believe that we have a potent enough off. It's so weird that I'm saying we, but I still do believe that we have a potent enough offense to be able to make good on those playoff expectations. We have thus far played 2-2 and 0 teams and lost to them both. But the Chargers coach, brandon Staley. I believe he's in year four, maybe five, of his being the coach of the Chargers. He has a super high powered weapon in quarterback Justin Herbert and if he cannot make the playoffs this year with Justin Herbert who is one of the best young players in the NFL or most talented, I should say, even though he hasn't completely made good on the potential, he's going to get fired. So this is going to be a big game between the Vikings and the Chargers. He's walking out 0 and 3. Our coach, kevin O'Connell, is safe. He made the playoffs in year one. It's only year two. You know, shit happens, but not the point Point is our running back, alexander Madison, who is the replacement for Dalvin Cook who left the Vikings to go to the Jets this year.
Speaker 1:He played in last week's in on Thursday's game and he sucked and he fumbled. He lost to fumble. We lost four fumbles in that game. We've lost seven fumbles in our first two games. But Alexander Madison has been our starter for these first two games and he's been really bad and I think most people who watch the Vikings, who are aware of who Alexander Madison is, had an idea that he was not going to be very good as our starting running back. What happened after that game is that he was. He's been accosted by Vikings fans. He has been told he should commit suicide. In his DMs he has been called the N word. He shared on Instagram images of these DMs he's received and what I'll say on that, before I get to these other headlines, is that I have a very, very, very, very very close friend who used to live in Minnesota who, if I'm recounting correctly, told me that he was twice called the N word out in public. I think one time was on a walk like out on a trail somewhere, and I can't remember when the other time was. But it is to say that, like I wasn't surprised that this thing happened to Alexander Madison. But there's a point I want to get to as I read through a couple of more of these headlines the Colorado State Kid.
Speaker 1:Safety for Colorado State. Travis Hunter, who is University of Colorado's star wide receiver cornerback, catches the pass. It's a deep out somewhere around the 20 yard line. This is the pass gets pushed. What happened Got? I don't know if he got hit or got pushed out of bounds. I can't remember this safety for Colorado State. And this is in the middle of a very dirty game, a very rough game, a game that you know they had a lot of buildup, with the coaches talking shit to each other and the players having smoke for each other. Whatever, this safety runs in from offscreen after the play is dead and wails off like snacks punches. What am I? I'm trying to tell you all. He hits him like a tackle. For anyone who doesn't watch football. What I'm trying to say is he throws his body into Travis Hunter in a dirty and illegal way to the sport and Travis Hunter now has a lacerated liver and he is going to be out of football for the next few weeks.
Speaker 1:One more, and I promise you there's a through line here Drew Barrymore. Drew Barrymore halts talk show return after backlash. We'll resume when strike ends. We talked about Drew Barrymore last week. Drew Barrymore broke the strike line, started her show back up without her writers guilt writers and has been subject to much criticism, much ire on the internet, many people, probably even in her real life, telling her don't do this, you're breaking the strike line, you don't want to break solidarity with the writers. Last one, it's all coming together, I promise. Last one, and this is the most important one that I think proves the role here.
Speaker 1:The Will Smith slap of Chris Rock is sort of you know at the Oscars, is back in. It kind of never completely leaves the conversation. It just gets quiet and then gets loud again. And it's back because Sean Penn did an interview with Variety actor Sean Penn and he said something along the lines of he had to, like, give his Oscars away and he was so sad and so affected and I can't believe this guy fucked up the Oscars or whatever. Whatever. Like his quote. Less important. The point is he was just throwing more shade at Will Smith. I saw a tweet by a black man that said I don't know if anything has ever affected white people the way Will Smith slap and Chris Rock at the Oscars has affected them. Not the murder of civil rights leaders, not videos of cops killing black folks, not January 6th. Okay, I'm about to make a point. Yes, morgan. He destroyed his Oscars. He didn't.
Speaker 1:He destroyed his Oscars. He didn't give them away. Okay, so that is so strange. That is like such unusual and strange and ridiculous behavior. But here's the point I want to make on all of this.
Speaker 1:Sports is this way. Entertainment is this way when you reach a certain level of comedy, stand up comedy that's why I wanted to land on this one is this way when you reach a certain level of visibility, when you reach a certain level of prosperity in a visible medium such as sports or entertainment, or hosting your own talk show, like Drew Barrymore. I think that people would like to believe that there is a separation between what you do at work and your real life, like your body, like you as a human being. I think it makes us feel safer to believe that those two things exist separately and that one need not actually affect the other, that we should have the right to divorce what we do when we're performing from our actual human safety and, I guess, like vitality.
Speaker 1:The point that I want to make is I think stand up comedy proves the point. I think it is the point. I think it most viscerally shows the point of this. I was of the opinion I don't know if we've ever talked about the Will Smith. I don't know if I've ever talked about the Will Smith thing on anything, josh. Have you ever heard me talk about it before? I can't remember.
Speaker 3:I don't think so.
Speaker 1:So this is my feeling about stand up comedy. Stand up comedians Dave Chappelle, chris Rock, amy Schumer, is it? Ally Wong, richer Pryor, eddie Murphy, think of all the stand up comedians. They are walking around the earth and living in a space where they have taken a certain and they've earned it in a lot of ways, because they have no doubt stood up in front of rooms with five people in them and got booed and bombed, and they've gone through hell to get to sharpen this ability that they have right, this magical ability to point out something that we are all aware of but that only they paid attention to enough to be able to call it out, describe it and have it hit that place in between what we like and what we don't like, to feel, which is funny, like right smack in the middle. They have earned the right to do this thing, but what they do and I know some of them and I spend time around them and I know that it can be exhausting to be around them for this reason, they have taken on the role in society of I can be as mean, as insightful, as incisive, as pointed as I want to, because I have funny in my arsenal I can say what the fuck I want to say to who I want to say it about, whatever it is about, whatever, and I can do it. If I'm Dave Chappelle, I'm taking this liberty. I'm going to say whatever the fuck I want about trans people Fuck y'all, I don't care, I'm Dave Chappelle, I'm so smart and I'm so incisive, I can do it. If I'm Chris Rock, I'm going to say whatever the fuck I want to say about Jada Pinkett, black women in their hair, whatever. Because I am that, because look at this smirk on my face I'm that fucking smart and funny and y'all going to eat it.
Speaker 1:And they walk around and they live as though there is some sort of like. This is where they're not smart. They walk around as if the protection they feel because I know a lot of comedians are this way because they are truly are insecure they want to get. They want to get you before that you get them. They want to see you before you see them. Right, I think writers are this way too in many instances and they think that that thing from their mind is actual protection, and I think they lose sight of the fact that, like when you walk up on that stage, the only laws that truly exist are the laws of physics. You are not protected, and I think Chris Rock lost sight of that at the Oscars.
Speaker 1:You are taking in any of these professions entertainment at a high level, sports at a high level, comedy at a high level. You are living with a risk that you must walk in every single day. Right, I live in that risk right now. This relates back to my friend who said I can't believe some of the. She said I'm surprised sometimes by how honest you are doing the thing. I must live with the risk that someone is not going to like what I'm going to, what I have said about them, and I have to live with the consequences of that Like, because I also get to live with the opportunity that that gives me. I get to live with the feeling that that gives me, which is joy and expression. I get to live with the admiration that other people feel because they want to do that same thing. If I get to live with all that stuff, I must live with the risk.
Speaker 1:Chris Rock, if you want to make fun of Will Smith's wife for having alopecia, you must now. I know you do now, but you must now accept that you could be slapped in the face because the rest of us, we don't do that. Your job does not. I've been trying to say this in so many different ways about so many different types of jobs your fucking job does not protect you Like it doesn't protect you. It is meaningless, like it's meaningless. Alexander Madison, of course, I think that's. I think that is. I have so many things you can read or listen to if you want my point of view on white people calling this man the N word, why he's doing his job and at the highest levels of entertainment. That is a risk that you are walking in every, when people are looking at you and listening to you and feeling you. This is why I mean I'm being, I'm being real. Like this is why, somewhere underneath it all, everyone who sort of there are so many people who want to be famous. There are many, many, many, many more people who are terrified of even being seen. There are many people who are afraid to even have 10,000 followers on Instagram and, despite their sort of like halfway wanting to step into it and like trying little dumb shit to like make people pay attention to them and like thinking they want it, sometimes thinking we want it, not other. They don't want it. Other times, like most people are terrified of that as a proposition, because indeed it is true, if people can see you, if they know what you think you live with, you live with whatever that does to them, if you ever run into them in person.
Speaker 1:I now run into a lot of people in person in my real life who know what I actually think, because I do this job. I come in here and I do it and I, like I said about my friend talking to my friend earlier, I don't say in real life the shit that I'd be saying in here, because it's not, it's not okay. Like I might say 80% of it, I might say 60% of it. If you're my close friend, I'll probably say 100% of it, but like this is different, I don't have to squeeze it into it. But then I see these people in real life and I'll give you a perfect example.
Speaker 1:I ran into somebody very, very recently and when I say ran into, I don't know her, don't know her name, still don't know her name. I've done it three times now in the last couple of weeks but don't know her name, don't remember meeting her anywhere. The first thing she says to me, when we walk up to each other in this place that we're at is I mean, she walks up to me, I'm sitting and I stand up to give her a hug and introduce myself, and she says I think we've met before In fact, we have met before a few times and she starts talking about my point of view on something that I don't really want to talk about right here, but, like my point of view on something that I delivered like a year and a half ago and I was called to task to defend that point of view in this place a year and a half later, right, a point of view that, for all she knows, I might not even have anymore. You know what I'm saying, but that is the fucking job. If it's still okay, I'll give you another example of how it is so valuable for me to have those points of view on record. Right?
Speaker 1:People come and find me now on Instagram. They go back to shit that I put up there two years ago. They go back and they engage with my book which I wrote, which came out in 2021, which I wrote four years ago. Right, that's value to me, but I must also live with, like, the other side of that value, which is that in their minds, I am then that person every time they see.
Speaker 1:Chris Rock is now the guy who got smacked forever, forever. We're going to see Chris Rock. We're going to think that man has a smackable face and I think he brought that into his own life by forgetting that, like these rules in your head about what can happen and where they are not real, I'm so I shouldn't say I'm glad that it happened, but if it was going to happen, I'm so glad it happened at the Oscars, I'm so glad it happened at a place where white people thought rich, famous, smug, fucking white people thought we have separated our rich white, thoughtful, liberal white people thought we have separated ourselves for these three hours from all of those broke ugly, indecent, uh immoral schmucks that live outside in the rest of the world. Right, my least favorite group of people on earth had to sit in that room and accept like it is just as dirty in here as it is everywhere else, and that's why fucking Sean Penn is mad. That's why Mila Kunis and Ashton Kutcher, who we talked about recently, and all this other what I don't even know who's on the laundry list, all this long other Judd Apatow, all these other rich, famous white people who think that they have done something because they campaigned for Joe Biden and, by the way, I voted for Joe Biden, campaign for Joe Biden and aligned themselves with liberal views and have a black friend in their photos sometimes and have a gay friend, whatever, like.
Speaker 1:All those people were in a room where they thought they were safe from real people and outside society and they did look at themselves and look at each other and remember and feel we're just like those other people. In fact, we are fucking worse because we pretend to be different. That's why Sean Penn is mad at Will Smith. That's why he wants to bust down his Oscars or whatever the hell he said he was going to do, because he was forced to face reality. There are, no, there is nothing between us and them. We're the same, we're gross, we're human, like, and Will Smith did a human thing For once. He fucking snapped and he did some human shit because Chris Rock did too much. I love it. I love it. All right, play some music. I'll come back. Sorry, I had to pause just to respond to Morgan on the mic. Morgan's like, of course you would like to slap. That was literally being like that was a reality smack, that was like being slapped.
Speaker 1:You only, you really only get to get so many jokes off about somebody's fucking alopecia because we have liquefied, we have melted down life to. I'm. So I was thinking this morning like I love my dog so much, I'm going to make it's going to make sense. I love my dog so much, my dog reminds me, because we have liquefied and melted life down to such a reduced version of like the human animal experience. Right, motherfuckers, walk At this point. A lot of people work from home, right, you wake up, you go make your little coffee, you do some, you eat some breakfast, you talk to your partner, you get your kids ready, whatever. You go walk into your office. You sit at a laptop all day, you scroll the phone, you turn on the TV, listen to music, like you do no human things. Okay, um, the point is, the point is like our lives have been reduced to this, to the, to the shit in that in Wally right, where those little things just like riding around with the phone right stuck smack in front of our face and people.
Speaker 1:I think people forget like we're actually out here, like our bodies are our bodies. There's actual stuff that can happen and I love my dog because my dog reminds me. My dog is so loud and crazy when she's barking, so probably 10 times a day I'm snapped out of whatever it is that I'm doing because, like my dog is barking murderously, it sounds like she wants to go and chase something. Like if I open the door cause she sees a squirrel out there, she runs like she wants to kill the squirrel. I don't think she'll actually kill it. But when we see another dog that has bad energy for her on the street, she barks so loud and she pulls so hard on the leash. But it reminds me this is life, is not supposed to be inertia, life is not supposed to just be like laying around waiting for the next, like ding on your phone, and I just, I, just I love the slap because finally something unscripted happened. You know what I mean.
Speaker 1:Like this dumb ass award show that we watch every hate. I don't watch it. But many people, most people, I think, hate watch. I don't think most people watch the Oscars because they're like, let me see what we're the best movies this year. Or like, oh, I can't wait to hear fucking you know, amy Schumer make jokes Like I think they watch. I think most people watch to hate the cool kids, because that's how everyone feels about the cool kids at school. Like most people watch to hate the fucking rich, smug cool kids. And God bless Will Smith for just like being like I don't, for this moment, I don't care about any of that shit.
Speaker 1:I bet it was worth it. I bet it was worth it for the year and a half that he had of having to answer for that and not work. I don't know if it was worth it to have to come back and play a slave immediately. I don't think that was worth it, but the rest of it, I think, was probably worth it. All right, okay, man, there's so much other stuff on this docket, but I know I'm not going to get to a lot of it. We'll save some for Thursday, because we always need more stuff on Thursdays.
Speaker 1:I'm going to say one thing quickly. We're going to move on to two things. One's petty, but it's I'm going to do it. I'm going to do what I told you, so you already know what this is. Listen, as someone who recently wrote for a show that may not make it to a third season, because, because, who knows? Because that's what, that's what's happening right now. I still must say this thing that I'm about to say, which is, look, some shows get shut down because there's not enough, there's not a big enough market for them. There's not. You know, they feature a cast that's not widely mass appealed in America. Some of them are like how to make it in America, which I thought was a fire ass show got shut down, in my opinion.
Speaker 3:I'll save you. Yeah, you, I love that show.
Speaker 1:In my opinion, one of the best shows that you how to make it in America got shut down, in my opinion, like prematurely. But like I'm the, I'm the viewer, I don't get to decide when the show gets shut down. The point is this winning time is over and, as in the show, winning time on HBO is done. It has been canceled. There will be no more. The last episode of it, episode seven of season two, was extremely rushed. It had a weird ass awkward landing where they like you're like 20% into the story of the show, time Lakers, and then the last beat of the thing gives you this weird like scroll of Karim of Duel Jabbar went on to be the leading scorer in NBA history and magic Johnson did this. Is the show finished before magic Johnson? Like I'm not trying to be an asshole, but like the show finished before magic even got HIV, which is like that was the cold open of the show. So we get no bookend. We get no like. We get no like what's the word resolution on this very important storyline of this thing? Like there was barely any jug sex and rock and roll. There was a lot of white guys in offices talking to each other, which I know I've complained about before. I'm looking at the ratings compared to the show had almost as low a rating might have the. Yeah, it had almost a low as low a rating as hard knocks on average, which is like hard knocks is a docu series. That's not a. That's not a. You don't pay like I don't know. Hbo is probably paying like $7 to $10 million per episode, maybe like $15 million per episode for winning time. Hard knocks probably has a budget of like a million dollars an episode, maybe two. You don't pay for a scripted show to have the ratings of hard knocks and I'm trying to tell you all it's not about any of these other silly reasons why shows flop, like all these like diagonal reasons that are just like you know, sometimes art doesn't hit the, it doesn't like hit the mark, like it was not a good show.
Speaker 1:I told you all that before, before other people were telling you all that. I told you that hard knocks I'm not hard knocks, winning time was not a good show. I told you why. I told you in what ways I wanted to see it improve. And now HBO is telling you everybody not everybody, but the HBO viewer HBO is a premium channel. They've made some of the best shows of all time. The HBO viewer also agrees that this is not a good show. I just wanted y'all to be educated on that before it got canceled, but y'all didn't want to listen, and now it's gone, so good riddance. One more thing and then I'm out of here. Not out of here, I'm moving on to Tyler Perry. We're coming to Tyler Perry in a second. No, we're going to Tyler Perry right now. So Tyler Perry had a conversation with whom? Morgan do we know? It was Hires Waiting with Crystal Renee Hayeslet.
Speaker 1:So Tyler Perry weighed in on black women dating men with less money and just to generalize this conversation because it keeps coming up frequently, black men are speaking to the phenomenon of black women wanting partnership, saying that they want partnership and being unwilling to and again, I don't think anyone is measuring well how true a phenomenon this is. But basically, speaking to black women saying I don't want to marry or date down, I don't want to date and marry a guy who I'm paraphrasing now but is a liability to my pocketbook, is a liability to my lifestyle, I don't want to float somebody else. The point is that Tyler Perry went in there, he went into a conversation with a black woman and I do believe Tyler Perry thinks himself some sort of like black woman whisperer because of his empire that he's built with Madia, madia, whatever with you know very bad movies. He said in so many words that if a man is, you know, if he's a solid person and if he does right by you and again I'm paraphrasing because this is the same shit that a lot of guys keep saying like if he does right by you, if he loves you, if he treats you well, you should be willing to. You know, you should be willing to make a partnership with a man who's like not meeting you at eye level, in terms of resources and education and money, and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
Speaker 1:Right, guys keep making this point and it brings up a couple of things for me. One is it's always and, oh, it's often couched with, like it's often there's often like this little nugget that's attached to it which is like, if you just do this, it'll work out. And it's always curious to me when, like one person and when I say curious I mean fuck shit it's always fuck shit to me when one person who is not a part of a community right, not walking around, spending their time and energy and lifestyle, learning and understanding a particular problem thinks that they have like a silver bullet answer for another. This is one person who thinks they have the answer for a whole fucking community of people who have been putting their heads together and talking and thinking and sitting in this particular issue. And that's what Tyler Perry is doing right here. He's saying I know all you ladies have been saying this and having these feelings and complaining about this and probably wondering about this and this and that and the third, but I, tyler Perry am here to tell you the answer is this thing. That's ridiculous to me.
Speaker 1:I honestly fucking hate it. I hate it when white people do it to black people, hate it when men do it to women. I probably don't notice when I do it to women. I hope somebody points it out if I ever do it. I think it's. It's Asinine, and I do think it is connected to Tyler Perry having this feeling that he I think he looks at black women like the word that came to mind was too strong which is like minions, but 100% his users, like his customer base. You know what I mean Like. I think he looks at them as like I have been on this feedback loop with black women for 30 years, I've built an empire on it, I know what they want and I give it to him, and I think that he thinks this is just another example of him doing that. There's no less drunk, clunky transition. But for me to say this, morgan, what do you think?
Speaker 2:I think people overall just need to stop telling cause he calls out black women specifically in the interview stop telling black women what they need to do in order to, and what they need to change about themselves in order to find love or to, like, make themselves more likable or palatable. It's really annoying, it's really old and yeah.
Speaker 1:Thank you, morgan. That was excellent. This morning I asked that when Morgan takes the microphone, that she be ready to concisely communicate her point of view, and you did great. You did so great.
Speaker 1:I just what is the thing that, like, I'm trying to like isolate, the thing that is so a fucking smug and annoying about this particular all right, all right, I'm gonna open it up a little bit. I have some some of you are gonna hate this I literally have a couple friends, one in particular, who, like Kevin Samuels and that sort of thing, they try to every conversation that I have with them not really every conversation, but like oftentimes if we're around each other too long, they start to push into the Kevin Samuels diaspora and they start trying to tell me about if black women would just do this thing, and it often puts me in the position of what probably comes off as like obnoxiously smug, annoying, woke, wanna be feminist ally guy which, like there's a lot of guys like me here in Brooklyn, new York and other places and I don't I'm not trying to be like that, but you know it is what it is. Like I think that stuff is dumb shit. Like I think I just don't think if a problem were so simple that it had such a simple and uncomplicated like solution as to just do these three things right. Just as someone like Kevin Samuels would say like just lose some weight, learn how to cook and recognize a high value man, you know what I mean. Like if it were as simple as those three things. I bet there are so many people who are willing to sacrifice their own wellbeing and mental health and emotional health to do those three things in hopes that it will work for them. But it doesn't work. Like this is a it's a bigger thing man. Like this is. It is underpinned by white supremacy. Like it's underpinned by anti-blackness within black people, which all of us contribute to on some level.
Speaker 1:I know I do not on purpose, but like I don't know it's a combination of the smugness of like I've said this before the smugness of men. The smugness of men affects us too, like we. It's annoying to us amongst ourselves, like the wanting to present a solution at all times, to feel like you are smart and like you're powerful. That men do to women. We do it to each other too, and it's so unappealing Like it's such a bad hang Like I can't not see it when I see Tyler Perry's face Also, I now associate Tyler Perry with BET and I think that affects how I see him also. But like, yeah, anyway, this is just gotta stop. Man, this is lazy, this is boring, this is self-serving, this is gross, and I think I've said enough. So, anyway, I just yeah, man, I just this is not some feminist shit, but I do find men are men. When we're acting like men, we are the worst version of ourselves. That's what I have to say. That's my point of view on manhood. That's my whole point of view on it. When we're just being people, we're pretty cool, like we're all right enough.
Speaker 1:All right, we're gonna go away, we're gonna do Q&A, we're going to do I'm gonna take two questions from my Instagram, I'm gonna answer them, then I'm gonna open the phone lines and then we're gonna get out of here. So BRB, okay, man, I hate when that like I have to drink my drinks, but whenever I play music in between my spills, we lose a couple of people and I'm like, can you guys just hold on while I just have a drink for 30 seconds? I guess not All right. So these are two questions I got on Instagram. Also, morgan just made an excellent point, which I just wanna call out again, which is it's a point that she I'm now gonna attribute to her. I'm gonna say she made it up even though she co-opted it from her friend. But the point is that everything today has to have, like this preamble, where you, where you, before you isolate your point of view, you have to acknowledge like this level of privilege here that you have and like this thing about this thing over here, and like it's unusual that someone just like says what they're saying because they feel like they have to like wrap it in this perfectly packaged box or what like they have to put all the little peanut bubble wrap around it, and that also regards something. Okay, so here are two questions I got on Instagram.
Speaker 1:The Instagram questions are really interesting to me. I asked that people ask me whatever they want. I say there's no dumb questions and it's just so. It's so fascinating to me to see if I had to guess what other people's questions were gonna be. I would be so way off, if that makes sense, like, which is why I think it's really important to communicate with your audience, cause it's like you don't know what they think.
Speaker 1:So one question I got was do you ever think about the folks who maybe didn't believe in you and what they might think now? And on its face, that feels like a very simple question. It's basically like there's two parts to that question. The first part is it's like do I think about people? Okay, it's not that simple of a question, but he's asking it simply because I think he thinks it is simple. It's not, though. Here's why it's not simple One. It asks me to do something that I feel challenged by. It's a struggle for me to. It is a struggle for me to stand in and accept that there's any like that. There's anything for someone who ever didn't believe me to now feel wrong about. That is difficult for me to stand in right, cause I'm like. I'm always like oh, but I have so much more meat on the bone right. There's so much further to go in this whole thing. What would I be doing? A victory lap on?
Speaker 1:Right now, I would say 60% of me feels like that most of the time, which is like if they didn't believe in me, then they could still not believe in me now. You know what I'm saying. Like I didn't become the person I said I was gonna be. But then there's the other side of me which is like no, I get what you mean. Which is like there were I don't really know. I can't summon a face of someone who quote unquote didn't believe in me, except for people who, like just passively didn't care about me. Which is like like the person who said, damn, chad, I didn't know you were smart, who said that to me, like after we had known each other for like seven years. There's people like that, but I just think those people are just dumb, like I don't think they can see.
Speaker 1:But there's a different class of people that I will speak to, which I think is the important group when we're talking about this thing. There are the people who I believe each one of us has people like this in our lives. There are people who actually see how special and expansive you are when you're doing your thing. Like they can see what you could become and for reasons that I think are probably projection and self-defense, they choose not. They want to not see it because it makes them so uncomfortable. It is a mirror onto them. Does this make sense, or do I need to be more specific? I think it makes sense.
Speaker 1:I'll be more. Does it make sense? Makes sense to me, but I'll still be more specific. There are people who, five years ago, when I started talking, or seven years ago how long it belong when I started talking about leaving this track all together, to come over here and do all this shit. I didn't even know all this other shit was over here, but when they just started to feel me breaking the track a little bit, I remember specifically and they did it in needling ways for years. I remember a couple friends who tried very anxiously, with great tension in our friendship and with much manipulation and much trickery, to hold onto me in a certain hold onto a very specific dynamic between us, which was one where they were the. We were both locked into this constitution where our job and our purpose was to march forward as Brian talks about this sometimes March forward as financially minded corporate escalator people and in breaking that contract I was committing a violation. I was, we were in cahoots to be miserable together forever. That was the dynamic. Josh is nodding Now y'all hear what I'm saying. Right, we were locked in on. We're gonna be unhappy forever, but at least we will have each other in this circle together.
Speaker 1:Hello, I'm talking to the Martha's Vineyard Niggas again. I'm talking to you, jack and Joe people. I'm talking to you investment banker people, hedge fund folks, talking to the people I worked at Google with, et cetera, et cetera. I'm just trying to be specific so y'all know exactly who I'm talking about, right? So you don't have to guess. You know who I'm talking about.
Speaker 1:And even some of the ones who left those jobs to go do other jobs, they left industries. They thought that they were leaving industries to go try other industries that would give them more. There are people who leave corporate shit altogether to come and try to do this, who think that that kind of change is gonna make them feel less stifled and less miserable. But like dude, it's you. You know what I mean. It's not the case. It's not the industry, it's not the environment those things naturally they support to make you still feel that way.
Speaker 1:But it's you. Like you're bringing the value system around. You can jump from here to Hollywood to music, to. You can go be Hillary and go make a farm in Washington state or something like that and shout out to Hillary. She looks very happy. But like you are bringing the bad, like you're bringing the bad vibes around with you. So the point is like I still know very clearly who those people were in my life who resented me for breaking the contract of misery, for breaking the contract of like, our job is to be stale. You know what I'm saying, josh, please.
Speaker 3:Yeah, like I can really relate to this because it doesn't even have to be about people that are trying to climb the corporate ladder. I can relate to this as, like with other creative people, there's a guy that we used to be best friends he's a little bit older than me but we were friends for I would say he was one of my best friends for God knows like 10, 12 years or something like that and, for lack of better words, like he and I were both miserable. Like he was a graphic designer and at the time, I was strictly working in music and we were just sort of trying to figure it out. Trying to figure it out, and when you're trying to figure it out, it's miserable. You know, you're trying to navigate all these things, but the thing that I always knew about him is that he was also like a for lack of better words, he was kind of a shitty person. Like you know, like he was not a person who knew how to work with people. Like I even tried to help him out and get a few. Like you know, I tried to even try to help him out and get him a few jobs and stuff.
Speaker 3:Like that Wildly talented dude. Like in terms of, like what he was good at. He was a very, very good graphic designer, but the minute I even started to sniff anything that felt like I won't even call it success. I mean I'll name drop here for just a second Like I was like the first sort of thing that ever happened for me this is even before I started the studio was like I worked for Jim Jones for about like nine months to a year and I could tell like that was like one of the beginning things, along with me getting into a relationship with my now wife.
Speaker 3:That was like one of the many things that really was like the foundation of what broke our friendship is because things started to and granted, like I was broke then too, like I was super broke, things were not good, but like just the fact that like that little bit of something is going right for me and nothing is going right for you and things could go right for you if you just learned how to not be a shitty person to be honest with you. But yeah, I mean like that, like you said, that contract of Misery Loves Company. I was just like, yeah, I'm not with this anymore and it's one of the reasons why I had to break that thing off with that person.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's very difficult to change the contract of a friendship once it's been established and as much as okay. So this gets to the next question, right, the next question was what made you decide to go for it? And I think that that's what someone asked me on Instagram and I, whenever I get this question, I always usually I would say 90% of the time when I get a question, I know that the impact of the thudding impact of me just like telling saying the thing that I think is the thing that was almost always the thing to go for, like people live for that shit. They don't even like, they don't even know they want it until they get it. And then they're like what the fuck? You know what I mean? And then it's like, then you're like, then you're kind of locked in this question. I always deliberate whether I'm gonna tell the truth, because the answer to this question do you already know what the answer to this question is, either of y'all what made me go for it? The answer to this question is regards to the former, which is just like, straight up, hot, spicy jealousy.
Speaker 1:Like just straight up, seeing three of my friends, in varying degrees, quit their job and jump both feet in the boat on trying to be creative, and this is so illegal for me to have these thoughts, but I'm being 100% real. Each these people were extremely close to me, like very close, okay, and I wasn't, it was like I. They each jumped into some of my pretty much different fields but like, okay, I remember for one he was leaving a tech company to go be a musician full time. That was his jump and he had his first show. He was like the second act on at a loft in Bushwick and there were probably like 30 people there and it was the night before I was supposed to take the GMAT, because I was just gonna keep slugging down the fucking, I was just gonna keep rolling down the luge and I was the loudest person in there cheering for him in that room because I didn't want anybody to see like, oh my God, I am so fucking jealous right now, like I'm about to go take this fuck ass GMAT tomorrow and this guy is about to go like totally shoot his shot at, like at his real dream, and I'm the one like walking around this same group of people that I'm talking about and like trying to live in, like trying to walk around with the identity of like, even though we all do this stuff that we hate. We secretly know Chad's the creative person that's what my ego was telling me Like we all secretly know like Chad's the creative one. And now they were actually going to be real creatives.
Speaker 1:Another one left his job, quit his job JP Morgan I've talked about it before. This is a very close friend of mine, still to this day. I was the best man, is one of the best men in his wedding flew out and flew out to Los Angeles to like go do the whole thing. Another one was my ex-girlfriend and it was like each person who was the closest person around me was like doing the thing, and I was the one sitting around trying to like hold on to this identity of like. You know, I'm the secret, undiscovered creative person, but people just don't know it.
Speaker 1:And it was like it became so burning, like it became so miserable, like I couldn't, like I really couldn't even. Like I couldn't even. I couldn't wake up without a different thought, with a different thought. Like every single day I had to be faced in different ways with like watching my life play out in a way that I just I was going to be miserable forever, and I was willing to be miserable forever if I had not felt the pain of jealousy, and so that jealousy, that jealousy freed me. That's the real answer. Okay, thank you for being here. This is a show that explores chaos in the world, et cetera, et cetera. We'll see you all Thursday at noon Eastern time. You can find the podcast anywhere you listen to pods. That's it, absolutely vista, hop-hop rappersする-group john olah.
