PSP 40 | Abundance through Simplicity - Spiritual Disciplines Series

In this episode of the Pursue Reality Podcast, Pastor Calvin and his wife Jacqlene get real about the spiritual discipline of simplicity. They share personal stories of cutting back on stuff, dialing down distractions, and making more room for God, family, and community. It’s an honest, practical conversation about how less really can be more—more peace, more gratitude, and deeper connections. You’ll walk away challenged to take a fresh look at your own rhythms, push back against cultural pressure to always have more, and discover how simplicity can open the door to a fuller, freer life with God and others.

Mentioned in this Episode:
Podcast:
Fight Hustle, End Hurry by John Mark Comer & Jefferson Bethke
Apple Podcasts || Spotify Podcasts

Books:
To Hell With the Hustle by Jefferson Bethke
The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry by John Mark Comer

Learn More About Reality Church: www.pursuereality.org

Follow Reality Church:
Instagram
Facebook
YouTube

Join Us In Person in Lancaster County, PA

Transcript

Speaker 1 00:00:10  You're listening to the new reality podcast from Reality Church. Each episode is a conversation about what it means to be real people pursuing a better reality in Jesus.

Speaker 00:00:26  Welcome to the Pursue Reality podcast. It's so good to have you here with us, and we are doing a couple of episodes off of a series that we have been preaching on called Big Money Moves, and just talking a little bit of a cheesy name, but talking about big moves you can make with your money that can make a big impact in your life. And we wanted to kind of do a deeper dive on a couple of those topics and talk a little bit more deeply, especially in this episode around the concept of simplicity and the spiritual discipline of simplicity. As God calls us to. And I've got some pretty great guests with me here today. I have got the one and only Pastor Calvin.

Speaker 00:01:08  Hello, everybody.

Speaker 00:01:10  And I have his beautiful wife. She's not only his wife, but, she's a member of our church and a leader in our church.

Speaker 00:01:18  Jacqueline, it's so good to have you. Hi. This is her first time on the reality podcast, so hopefully not the last time to have you on here. but, yeah, I had asked them to be on here because of, their own testimony, I guess, of how God has led them in this specific area of their life and of living simply and living with simplicity, I should say. And actually, this is something where I don't think we talk about a lot, historically through the Christian church and through the ages, living with simplicity is something that the global church has felt God has actually called us to. and I don't think it's an accident that we probably have forgot about it a little bit today. Or maybe don't realize that, about how Scripture teaches us to be people that, live with simplicity spiritually, physically, financially, in a lot of different areas. And it's something we probably need more than ever as we live in the richest nation on earth in a culture of abundance. And I'd love to start just with a question, because we don't talk about it.

Speaker 00:02:35  When I say living with simplicity, what does that actually mean to you guys? What comes to your mind when you think about that?

Speaker 00:02:43  Yeah. Living with simplicity. It's I think it can be like for me, it's it's all focused on like identifying distractions. So it's like taking a look at your life And really trying to discern asking the Lord, but also just in your own wisdom, just looking at your life like what is truly a distraction for you. Think about even, you know, get a little bit selfish and think about like your desires, your hopes, your dreams. Like what you want out of life. You only have so many hours in a day. You must have some. You only have so much capacity in your heart for for these things, what in your life is costing you more and is not actually producing the fruit that you want to produce?

Speaker 00:03:30  But that's really good. It's it's interesting because we often think of having more is always a blessing, but when you frame it in that way that it actually can be thinking about it as these are possible distractions from what's most important.

Speaker 00:03:46  Then it really it kind of changes the conversation. What about you, Jacqueline?

Speaker 00:03:53  I would say I've consumed a lot of content on minimalism and simple living. So I came up with what I thought was my definition, but it might actually be someone else's. That's just like deeply ingrained. Yep. But basically, like removing distractions, whether it's like social media apps, whatever items in your home, removing distractions to create more space for things that actually bring you joy. So it's less about having less and more about having more of what you actually feel called to feel like God is leading you to you as a person, rather than just like going with the flow of cultural norms. Like, it's really challenging cultural norms and identifying like, what do I actually want in my life? Versus what is everyone else telling me I should have in my life?

Speaker 00:04:44  That's really good. Yeah. Do you guys so has to share a little bit? Has this been something you've always lived, or has this been a journey that's kind of unfolded where you, God led you into this? Like.

Speaker 00:04:57  How how did you come to this conclusion? God or this focus?

Speaker 00:05:02  I would say 5 to 7 years of a journey. So it wasn't like a an overnight shift, although there was moments where it felt like we're making an overnight shift. But, I feel like it started when I listened to a podcast like series repeatedly. I probably listened to it like 4 or 5 times through. Now it's the fight, hustle and hurry. Yep. It's a podcast that was created by two different authors of two books. Yeah, the ruthless elimination of hurry, like my favorite book of all time.

Speaker 00:05:34  And Jefferson, Bethke and.

Speaker 00:05:35  Jefferson and Jefferson.

Speaker 00:05:36  I tried to put a link in the podcast notes for people to check that out.

Speaker 00:05:39  So,

Speaker 00:05:40  They wrote the books at the same time, unbeknownst to each other. Okay.

Speaker 00:05:45  And they're both Christian authors.

Speaker 00:05:47  As.

Speaker 00:05:47  Well.

Speaker 00:05:47  No way. I'm writing a book on that. And so I love that podcast. But sorry.

Speaker 00:05:52  Go ahead. So I listened to that podcast.

Speaker 00:05:55  Like fell deeply in love with it. Felt very challenged. But there's so much content in that podcast that it took us a long time to get to like simplicity from there, because simplicity is just like one episode of this podcast. So I listened to that podcast probably 3 or 4 times through, tried to get Calvin to listen to it.

Speaker 00:06:12  I did a few episodes, a few episodes. It's a lot to bite off, like.

Speaker 00:06:17  It's really deep and then.

Speaker 00:06:18  It's hard to implement.

Speaker 00:06:19  I read the book The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry. and then throughout, like, you know, my time of really, like, chewing on all of this content. Like, we made slow steps. Like, I feel like the first thing that happened was the media fast at reality. Yeah. I forget how long ago that was. That was a long time ago.

Speaker 00:06:39  I don't know, we were. We weren't living in this house.

Speaker 00:06:42  No, we were in our.

Speaker 00:06:43  Past, which is. It's funny that we're we're meeting.

Speaker 00:06:45  We're have we're recording this podcast in our home right now, which is fun to think about. But we were in our old apartment and reality had done a media fast to kick off the year like 21 days of, you know, and it was kind of like at your own,

Speaker 00:07:03  Like.

Speaker 00:07:04  Yeah. Like what? What do you feel like God wants you to cut out? And, we pretty much we we cut. I can't remember if I even had social media at that point. Or was that the breaking point for me?

Speaker 00:07:15  No. You did.

Speaker 00:07:16  So I stopped I, I stopped using social media, like I say, using.

Speaker 00:07:22  Yeah.

Speaker 00:07:22  Stop using.

Speaker 00:07:23  Rebellion.

Speaker 00:07:25  we really cut down on on even entertainment media.

Speaker 00:07:31  We only listened to sermons.

Speaker 00:07:32  We only listened to sermons.

Speaker 00:07:33  That was our television for that time period. Yeah. And so after that, I felt really called. And it took a little bit to get Calvin on board. But he did get there of like, let's just not own a TV anymore.

Speaker 00:07:47  And we had friends who at the time wanted a TV they like, needed a bigger TV. And I was like, I have a TV that I don't want. So you can have it. So we gave away our TV. you threw away our Xbox? Yeah. Because we were really into Call of Duty at the time.

Speaker 00:08:03  The duty phase for us there.

Speaker 00:08:04  Yeah.

Speaker 00:08:05  That was Covid then.

Speaker 00:08:06  That was a Covid quarantine moment. Yes.

Speaker 00:08:09  So yeah, 2019, 2020.

Speaker 00:08:10  We got rid of our TV and that was like a step into like, okay, well now what do we do with all our time because we don't have a television anymore.

Speaker 00:08:18  So simplicity for you guys wasn't just possessions. It was simplicity of time.

Speaker 00:08:22  Oh, yeah.

Speaker 00:08:23  Yeah. Simplicity of, like, input into your life.

Speaker 00:08:26  It started very much so. About like, time capacity.

Speaker 00:08:30  Yeah.

Speaker 00:08:30  And also, just like I. I felt this way. And I still do feel this way. Like, someday I will be at the end of my life.

Speaker 00:08:38  And whether I will have the time to know that or not. But like will I have found like, contentment. Like, oh, I'm so glad I watched 5000 TV series in my lifetime. Am I going to be glad I spent that time doing that? Or is there other things I should have been doing?

Speaker 00:08:54  Yeah, I remember I used to watch like, every Penguins game. Yeah, a big ice hockey fan. And one year I like added up the hours that it would that I'd spend. And I was like oh wow. Like that's too much. And I have other things that like it's.

Speaker 00:09:11  A dangerous.

Speaker 00:09:11  Practice. Well, I was like year after year. I'm, I have dreams and aspirations and field things that I feel like God's called me to. Yeah. Then I'm just not even remotely accomplishing. And I'm spending 160 hours of my life a year, a year.

Speaker 00:09:25  I'm sorry, but I'm feeling convicted right now.

Speaker 00:09:27  Yeah. And and and that's the thing, like like I, I'm hesitant with this podcast because it has taken us many years to get to a place that we're at.

Speaker 00:09:36  Yeah. And, but I it wasn't too long ago that I was like, hearing different things and like, I'll never be able to do that and it's overwhelming. But we took steps, to implement different things. And, and God was patient. He was gracious with us and.

Speaker 00:09:49  Yeah. So? So what? As. When you're looking at your life today, what does simplicity look like in your daily life? And maybe describing it in ways like how is it different than maybe the average American lives? Like and of course average is just average. Not everybody lives the same way. But in general you guys have made some intentional choices to live in a different way than has been handed to us.

Speaker 00:10:18  Yeah.

Speaker 00:10:19  What paint a picture of that for people to kind of. I think you're starting to do that but kind of fill that out.

Speaker 00:10:24  So some things that we didn't touch on, I'm just thinking about like my, my daily life and, and us sitting in this room, we're sitting in our living room in our house right now.

Speaker 00:10:32  And this is like the only real space where we, like, spend time with people. And there's no TV in here. The the chairs and the couch. Like we're looking at each other. So our house is very much geared towards spending time with other people, with their family. so the way that we set up our house. We eat anytime we're home. If we're home, we eat every meal at the dining room table together. like those are, those are two things that we've like and those are kind of boundaries and, and, and but a little bit like there's simplicity in it. Right. Yeah. There is I don't know what else.

Speaker 00:11:11  Well I would say for us like you said like no TV, we also don't engage in impulse purchases.

Speaker 00:11:19  Yeah.

Speaker 00:11:19  Like, almost every purchase we make has been thought about for six months to a year.

Speaker 00:11:23  Sometimes to a fault on your end.

Speaker 00:11:26  Overthinking it sometimes, yes. we have very minimal wardrobes compared to everyone. Maybe even other minimalists.

Speaker 00:11:35  I definitely have less than a ten item wardrobe.

Speaker 00:11:37  Oh, I definitely wear the same things week after week.

Speaker 00:11:40  Like, so you guys have less than ten items in each of your wardrobes.

Speaker 00:11:44  Ten outfits, ten outfits.

Speaker 00:11:46  Okay. I was going to say, how do you do that? Yeah, that seems like. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. So you're about ten outfits that you guys cycle through?

Speaker 00:11:54  Pretty much.

Speaker 00:11:54  Yeah. Okay.

Speaker 00:11:55  So let's just kind of per season two. So, like, we don't just have.

Speaker 00:11:58  Things like you switch them out.

Speaker 00:12:00  Yeah. I own a.

Speaker 00:12:00  Winter any given season. Like, we have ten things that we're using.

Speaker 00:12:03  That makes sense. And so let me push on that because I think people are just listen to that and they're like, excuse me. What? Yeah. because I go to garage sales and I've seen people's closets. Yeah. And that's definitely not. That's like ten outfits that are just on the chair in the bedroom. That doesn't count what's in people's closets, right? how? How do you do that? And.

Speaker 00:12:31  Well, I want to push back.

Speaker 00:12:33  Yeah.

Speaker 00:12:34  Jacqueline, you would be considered a fashionable person.

Speaker 00:12:37  Oh, wow. Thank you. I don't think that's something like that.

Speaker 00:12:40  I don't want to, like, stereotype, but some people are less fashionable. Like, you know, I don't look at you and think, oh gosh, doesn't she know that the outlets are down the road? Like she could buy clothes like you look like you look normal. Like you fit in. You're fashionable. And Cal, you're on stage. Yeah. A lot. Yeah. Like that's part of your job is to be in front of people. Do you guys feel that pressure? Do you feel like how do you. Because it's one thing to be like, yeah, we'll just do something different than culture. But you still live in culture.

Speaker 00:13:13  Yes.

Speaker 00:13:13  Yeah. And and not just all of it's pressure. Sometimes you're just like, I find that beautiful or I find that really nice, and I would like to have nice things in my life.

Speaker 00:13:22  Yeah.

Speaker 00:13:22  So how do you deal with that?

Speaker 00:13:24  So for me, I love having a very minimalist wardrobe that has been one of the most enjoyable parts of, like, simple Living, because I never think about what I'm wearing anymore and everything about what I'm going to wear today. I never think about, like, I never try on an outfit. I'm like, I want to take this off. Like, this wasn't the outfit for today, I haven't had that thought in years now, and it's really freeing. And then on top of it, the freedom of purchasing is also really enjoyable because I no longer feel the pressure of like, is this in style? I don't care. Like I buy things like, do I like the way I feel in this outfit? Is it fun to me? Is it authentic to my personality? So that actually more enjoyable.

Speaker 00:14:09  Process has actually freed you?

Speaker 00:14:12  Yes.

Speaker 00:14:13  From a lot of pressure.

Speaker 00:14:15  Yeah. So I've actually.

Speaker 00:14:16  Like.

Speaker 00:14:16  Which is crazy to hear from a woman.

Speaker 00:14:18  Yeah, especially in our society.

Speaker 00:14:19  Very much so.

Speaker 00:14:20  Like there's so much pressure and like thank goodness. Honestly, thank goodness that you're not on social media very much because that just adds pressure to women.

Speaker 00:14:30  Yeah, yeah, definitely. Getting rid of social media helped with that because I don't really think about what is everyone else wearing now. If I find something, even if it's like maybe not something I've ever seen on any other person, and I'm like, I love that I always have room in my closet for more. There's definitely room. especially with how much we wear our clothes. Like, you kind of need to cycle things out because they don't last forever. so.

Speaker 00:14:58  I'm giggling internally because you're currently wearing a dress.

Speaker 00:15:01  I've had for six years.

Speaker 00:15:03  But not only have you had that for six years, you bought another one because you love. You love this one so much that when this one's finally considered.

Speaker 00:15:14  I do the same.

Speaker 00:15:14  Thing. When it's finally considered.

Speaker 00:15:15  The.

Speaker 00:15:16  Backup. No, just even just dirty.

Speaker 00:15:18  It's finally considered dirty. She's like, I'm good. I have the other one.

Speaker 00:15:21  I like.

Speaker 00:15:22  It. I love the way I feel, I love the way I look, and I love it.

Speaker 00:15:25  I love.

Speaker 00:15:25  It. And it works for toddlerhood, too. I just saw a pair of shorts on it, and it's a whole outfit, so. But, I just find it to be really freeing, and I feel like I've discovered more of who I am. Like, I don't think about culture. I just am like, what do I feel good in? And that's a really enjoyable experience every day to get dressed and be like, I feel good in this outfit and I'm never tempted to wear something just because I bought it, and I don't want to waste the money.

Speaker 00:15:50  Just freed you from deciding like, what would people think of this? Or is this in fashion or stuff?

Speaker 00:15:55  Yeah, yeah. And there's no like guilt around clothing. Like I bought that and I don't wear it.

Speaker 00:16:00  Like, should I get rid of it? I'm not hanging on to things. Yeah. If I make a mistake, I bought something and then I end up not liking it. Yeah, people make mistakes. You just get rid of it. Yeah.

Speaker 00:16:09  So what about you, Kyle? Being in front of people, do you feel? I think, yeah, sometimes we stereotype that men don't care about these things, but men care.

Speaker 00:16:17  Yeah. No, I, I definitely care. I think, like, I think with you, Jacqueline like your personality and just. I've known you for 14 years. Like, you've always been a really disciplined person. So that kind of journey for her to get to the place of like, I just don't care. I like the way I look and I feel good. you that was probably quicker. I feel like I'm still a little bit on that journey. but what does keep me grounded is those same things. I'm like, I like this. I feel me when I wear certain certain things.

Speaker 00:16:53  And I've just over time, more and more just come to a place of it's okay. Like. And the people who know me know my life like they see me. You wore that last week. You wore that three days ago.

Speaker 00:17:03  I work with you and I can attest.

Speaker 00:17:04  Yeah.

Speaker 00:17:06  It's the same ten outfits.

Speaker 00:17:07  Yeah. You know, it's it's honestly become a part of me that I'm. I'm proud of. Yeah, I like that. I'm no longer. You know, there's moments especially like, considering the stage, like I'm like, okay, it's Sunday again. I can't wear what I wore last week. Honestly, I go through this. I go, okay, what I wear last week, in the week before. I try not to wear either of those. Yeah, but sometimes.

Speaker 00:17:29  I look it up on YouTube. I look at myself just to see some, because I have some things I wear on stage and I'm like, that's fine. At least I try not to duplicate everything.

Speaker 00:17:37  Honestly, that rule is loose. The true hard rule is like, just don't worry. What you wore last summer. Yeah, yeah. Honestly, you're probably in summer months. Like, you'll probably see me. Where? option A, option B, option a, option b.

Speaker 00:17:49  So let me ask you guys a question. Here's a question. Because we live in a culture, puts a lot of pressure and a lot of thought into like what we owned. We have nice stuff. Do we have the right clothes that are in season? I'm online. The number of suggestions I get for like the top ten things people are wearing fall 2025. I'm like, whoever came up with that list, right? Has anyone ever commented to you like, are you guys okay? Do you need help with your clothing? Have you ever gotten one comment? Let's negative in that way.

Speaker 00:18:24  We get jokes from people who love us and know us and.

Speaker 00:18:28  But like random people do, people comment to you? No one does, right? No one cares.

Speaker 00:18:32  That's my point is, no one's walking up and being like.

Speaker 00:18:35  Oh, no one thinks about the way you look as much as you.

Speaker 00:18:37  Do. Yeah, like.

Speaker 00:18:39  Yeah, no one else cares what you wear. Yeah, it's really just like an internal. We feel the pressure, but, like, if you think about it, like, how many people can you think of in your life where you're like, I know exactly what they were last time I saw them?

Speaker 00:18:51  No, no, no one.

Speaker 00:18:52  Everyone is wearing.

Speaker 00:18:53  Yeah.

Speaker 00:18:54  It's just something we think people are going to remember.

Speaker 00:18:56  And to go a little bit financial a little bit here. Like we don't look ragged other than sometimes my jeans do because I have a toddler. I play on the floor a lot.

Speaker 00:19:05  Yeah, you're always busting balls in your.

Speaker 00:19:06  Knees, but I thrift jeans. I got these jeans. These are nice. I got these for five bucks. Yeah. The thrift store. they'll probably last another six months, I hope, with in the knees.

Speaker 00:19:16  But we, we also don't buy like, especially you like when you go and you buy clothing. She buys nice quality things. So like, it's not like we look ragged. No. You know.

Speaker 00:19:29  Well I buy, I have to buy a higher quality item because it needs to be able to be washed every single week for at least one full season, if not multiple years. Yeah.

Speaker 00:19:40  So how has this affected your spiritual life and your relationship with God? This has led you on this journey. It's not just your own ideas like God's been leading you, but how has this affected how you've related to him in your your walk with him?

Speaker 00:20:00  I feel like it's definitely accelerated growth. Oh, yeah. for me, because you come face to face with your own selfishness a lot in this process. because there's just a lot of wants that we want. And then you have to really think about, well, why do I want that? And then you get to the root of it. Yeah.

Speaker 00:20:20  And it's like, because so-and-so has it or I, I want to feel a certain way or whatever it is.

Speaker 00:20:26  I want to be perceived a certain way.

Speaker 00:20:28  So you have to come self to self with your or face to face with yourself in this process, and it really causes you to reflect on like, well, is that what God would want me to do? Yeah. You know. Yeah. I feel like that has been part of the journey for me. And then also, like, just simple living. We have a simple lifestyle. I end up with time here where sometimes I'm like, man, I can't wait for my toddler to wake up from nap because I'm. I'm bored. I'm ready for her. I don't have a TV that's distracting. Like I don't have distractions. So you're very aware of joy when you're experiencing it. You're like, wow. Like, how many times have we sat and it hasn't been like, we feel like there's no richer person on earth than us.

Speaker 00:21:07  We're like, we are the most, like, blessed people in the world. Yeah. And when you feel that, it's really wonderful. But then on the flip side of it, when you're having a hard season, there's no distracting and numbing the feelings. You are just sitting in your feelings.

Speaker 00:21:20  But both of those things are healthy. Like, you should be aware. Like when you when you create margin in your life, when you start to simplify, you make space for yourself, to process yourself, to feel all your feelings there. Their God gave you your emotions and their evidence of things happening in your life. And it's healthy, healthy to process them. You. I think simplicity does heighten your sensitivity, or awareness to what's going on in your life. Yeah, and in both good and bad ways. But I would say especially the good ways, like, especially the good ways, you just become your your gratitude just skyrockets. You're just made more aware of, just the, the true abundance in your life.

Speaker 00:22:07  One of our family values is living in abundance is what we call it. And it's that in every season of life, we're going to have eyes to see how God is giving, given us more than we could ever ask.

Speaker 00:22:23  Always way more than we feel we definitely don't feel deserving of. Yeah, the gifts God has given us, I do.

Speaker 00:22:30  I think you guys are really hitting on, Just the spiritual and emotional place that busyness and possessions and media and all these different things that just make our life busy and noisy and complicated. And it's it's a it's spiritually shapes us, and fills up our time, actually, and more and more convinced that we are not busier than we've ever been, that we're more distracted than we've ever been. Yeah. And people just say we've never been busier. Like, no culture and history has been as busy as us. And I actually don't think that's true if you eliminate all these things. And here I think we're kind of capturing it through what you guys are saying.

Speaker 00:23:22  Simplicity in life. We actually have time. Yeah. If you had at people screen time in our shopping time, in our maintaining all our stuff time, we have time. It's just. It is so in a vise grip of all these things. and I want to highlight to just it's so healthy. because they do serve this emotional function in our life. And when we numb ourselves from those emotions, we don't want to feel. Because, like you said, it sounds terrible. I'm sure people are listening like, well, I don't want to feel those bad feelings and sit in them. But when we can't sit in those, you can't numb some emotions and not numb others. That's how God built us. If you numb sadness, you will also numb joy. Yeah. You. If you have to be able to feel the down emotions and in order to feel the up. Like that's how we function. We can't just kind of pick the ones that we're doing. And I think your guys are just really describing that simplicity of focus enables you to engage all of life, but when you do that, it just creates such, space for that abundance, the joy, Gratitude.

Speaker 00:24:32  And even like I, I've spent a lot of my life like stuffing feelings and emotions and negative, negative ones. Me too. And I've come in the last couple of years, just have come to embrace those seasons because I feel the closeness of God more than ever.

Speaker 00:24:48  Yeah.

Speaker 00:24:49  Also, I just want to touch on like as a female, I've done a lot of research on like now it's been years and I am kind of just like living in simplicity now, not like actively researching. Is this something I want? So I'm not going to say any stats, but I remember that there was a study done on the impact of items in your visual space as a female, and the effects on your anxiety. Yeah. And so I would encourage anyone who's experiencing, if you're feeling like, man, I'm living with low grade or even high, high levels of anxiety on a daily basis. You might want.

Speaker 00:25:23  To.

Speaker 00:25:23  Yeah, start living a life of simplicity in some regard, whether it's just in your like, possessions or your, what's that thing called? Kevin? A calendar? Your schedule?

Speaker 00:25:35  Yeah.

Speaker 00:25:35  Schedule your time.

Speaker 00:25:36  Yeah. Like, work on reducing the amount of clutter in your life everywhere. And you might find that your anxiety just naturally goes away. It's so much easier. It's so much more peaceful just by having less stuff in our space. Yeah. It's like such a simple way to physically reduce your anxiety levels. So.

Speaker 00:25:55  Totally. Yeah, this this is very good, very challenging. And I actually wouldn't say I have like a crazy and probably medium simplicity. but it's challenging in a way. I hope as people are listening that they long for it. because it is a gift, even if it's a little bit, hard in that way. how has it. I just want to ask a couple more questions. How has it impacted your family life? You've got one child, one on the way. very soon. Here. Yeah. Jacqueline is fully with child. Your friendships, community. Have you seen an an impact there, in your life?

Speaker 00:26:43  Yeah, totally. I, I think for me, like being in ministry.

Speaker 00:26:53  being like somebody who's ambitious. Like, I love working. Like, I love putting my hands to things. I, I like accomplishing things. and there was a lot, like, a a long season of life where that was where I got a lot of fulfillment. And I really was nervous to slow down. I was nervous to sit and just be with my family even. and like. Yeah, it was, it was boring to me. Yeah. It wasn't giving me the hit that I wanted it to give me. But when as soon as we started slowing down and simplifying life, like I started becoming way more present at home, like I realized I was like, oh, it's not that this is boring or not fulfilling, it's just that I haven't even been here. I'm not even sitting here like you're talking to me and my mind somewhere else. Simplicity has helped me become more present, in the moment. And that's elevated family life. Like, yeah, we have a family day every week that is no longer a pencil calendar item.

Speaker 00:28:04  It's a non-negotiable. This is our Sabbath. This is our family day. Yeah. And I love that day.

Speaker 00:28:10  And Olive loves it.

Speaker 00:28:11  It fills me up.

Speaker 00:28:13  Yeah. She, like she gets so excited. She's like family day. Like it's so cute. Yeah. Which is really special too. So.

Speaker 00:28:20  Yeah. And I think for like, friends, I think it's had a number of, like, different kinds of impact. like, I think we've inspired some friends to. To to live certain ways and then and that that would be the positive and then negatively. Sometimes it it causes a little bit of and probably we feel it more than anything. Of like, you know, sometimes you have to say no to things. Yeah. And you can't do. you know.

Speaker 00:28:47  We can't always keep up with the lifestyles of people around us, and we have to say, sorry, that doesn't work for us in this season of life. Especially with, like, having young children in our house.

Speaker 00:29:00  Like, this is just a season where it's healthy to be going at a slower pace because these years are going to fly by and I won't get them back. And so, like I think about bedtime with Olive. Like she goes to bed at like 7:00 almost every night. And like every single night, Calvin and I are up there snuggling with her in her bed at bedtime. Like talking about God, talking about her day. And what did you do today? And just those moments like, I feel like it's like we get the everyday blessings are really palpable for us right now in the season of life, because we are just so present.

Speaker 00:29:37  Yeah, like they're just so evident and you just they're so sweet, like these moments and yeah.

Speaker 00:29:47  It's so good. I mean, when you guys are really when we actually engage with life, life is really special. Yeah, definitely. And I think too many of us are not fully engaged with life. Were distracted. what would you encourage someone who's listening to this.

Speaker 00:30:03  And they're like I, I want this like they're feeling that tug in their heart. because they, they want that. What is one encouragement or advice like first steps they could take. because you're not. you guys didn't do this overnight, and you're describing how God has kind of led you guys. What would you say to others that that want to start that journey and how they. What encouragement could you give them?

Speaker 00:30:35  I would say if you feel any amount of conviction, that's a great thing because usually like conviction is the start of life change, which is going to lead you to like a better life. And that's what God is wanting for you. So if you're feeling any amount of conviction around it, it's like God wants to give you something better and you shouldn't, like, turn away from conviction or try to pretend it's not there. You should really go towards it and explore it. Like, wow, I'm feeling this thing. Like, what does that mean? that would be one thing.

Speaker 00:31:05  But then the other thing I would say is very easy. step that was very eye opening for me was it felt like, you know, years of, like, building up to simplicity. And then there was that day where I texted you and I was like, don't be mad at me when you come home, because I had I had taken everything out of every drawer in every cabinet in our house, and I was just sitting in our stuff and I was like, I hate almost all of this stuff. Like, I don't want it. Why is it in our space? Why did we spend money on this stuff? And so it's just it's a very eye opening experience to really look at your stuff and be like, why do I own all this stuff? Why did I spend money on this stuff? What? What am I thinking when I'm making purchases? I'm just buying stuff to just buy stuff. Like so I have that moment when Oliver was probably six months old, where I went through everything in our house and I got rid of so much stuff, and we sold so much stuff on Facebook.

Speaker 00:32:06  And like, people were thrilled to have our stuff. And I'm like, you can have it. It's a blessing. Thank you for taking it. And we made money and from selling all this stuff in our house and we were like, okay, what do we what do we actually want in our house? And we got to like, yeah, we got to like, invest in things that we were like, I could never spend that much money on that item. Yeah, like my Dutch oven.

Speaker 00:32:26  We got a Dutch oven because you were. You're baking bread. and we got a knife block because we do.

Speaker 00:32:33  A nice one.

Speaker 00:32:33  We spent a lot of time in the kitchen together, especially now that we're living more simply. we try to cook a lot of our meals, and we get to do that together.

Speaker 00:32:43  But it was just. It's very eye opening to look at your house and look at everything in it and really ask yourself the question, like, why do I own this? What's the reason that this is still in my house? Why haven't I let this go? and it just makes you start to really reflect and think.

Speaker 00:32:57  And then every time you go to buy something after that, you're like, why am I buying this? Because you don't want to just buy something to put it in a drawer and then never use it again, like we did with like, probably a thousand items in our house. Yeah. And I can't even name five items we've gotten rid of. Yeah. Can you remember anything that we've gotten rid of other than the TV and the Xbox?

Speaker 00:33:16  Yeah. Honestly, no.

Speaker 00:33:19  which is embarrassing because we've got so much stuff.

Speaker 00:33:21  I'm literally trying to name something.

Speaker 00:33:23  I know there were some board games, but other than that, like, I can't tell you. And that just tells you how much the stuff had no value to us and it was just taking up space in our life. So it's a very practical step to start that thought process.

Speaker 00:33:35  Take a room or a few rooms in your house and just.

Speaker 00:33:37  Declutter.

Speaker 00:33:37  And declutter or see.

Speaker 00:33:39  And maybe give your spouse a warning. If you're married, maybe you're going to catch them on board.

Speaker 00:33:43  But you'll see what that feels like. Yeah, and 99% of the time, I would guess it's going to move you to want to do it to more spaces because you're going to feel that piece. Yeah. what would you say, Cal?

Speaker 00:33:54  Yeah. I was just thinking, like, to bring, like, to go pastor, like to bring the spiritual, like, like this is very much so. A lot of practicals, a lot of tangible things. We're talking about stuff and simplifying. but it's you're out the outside world is a is a very good mirror of what's on the inside at 100%. and, you know, we're we're you're most likely listening to this as a follower of Christ. And, you know, you have a deep desire to you. You want to live a more fruitful life. You want to live a life that's pleasing to God. you want to be more like Jesus. You feel that desire and and the tension. and these practical steps make way for you to do that and the like.

Speaker 00:34:43  Jacqueline, like you said, the the conviction and the guilt is an absolute. It's a gift. Like, it's not meant to push you away. It's it's it's the refiner's fire. It's. Yeah. The silversmith that that's drawing things out of you until he sees his reflection in that top layer of silver. Yeah. That's what God's doing in you when you, when you push into those moments. and I would also say, like, God calls you according to purposes. And a lot of times those purposes align with the desires that he's placed in your heart. So this isn't a denial of every little thing that you want. It's not, but it's a rediscovery of what desires do I have in me that are from the father, that are in line with his purposes for my life? And when you get to scratch those itches and you're like, oh, this is from God. Yeah. It's like the, the, the joy is, is multiplied. So like in the process, don't be afraid to ask.

Speaker 00:35:45  Like what what desires do I have that align that that could align with with God and and his purpose is for me. and I think that's freeing, and it's exciting.

Speaker 00:35:55  It's so good.

Speaker 00:35:56  Can I say one more thing?

Speaker 00:35:57  Yeah, please.

Speaker 00:35:58  I also was just thinking about how it also shifts your mindset with your items that you own to be less personal, like, it's less personal, like everything in our house. Like, it's not like this. There's no emotional tug that there probably used to be. And it's created a bit like our ability to rely on community is so much bigger. Like the things in our house, they aren't just for us, they're for people in our life. If you need our stuff, you can have it. And also, like, we're not afraid to lean on community. Like, I just texted Chrissy today and I was like, hey, can I borrow your I don't know what that thing's called, but it's like a rug cleaner.

Speaker 00:36:38  Yeah. Poor.

Speaker 00:36:38  Yeah, because I don't need to own one.

Speaker 00:36:40  Like, I have someone in my life that I can borrow it from.

Speaker 00:36:43  And so I have, like a handheld one. And you guys swap me?

Speaker 00:36:46  Swap all the time. Yeah. So it's like, it creates, like, this community where it's like, my stuff is yours. And like, do you, do you want to invite me into your life? Can I borrow your stuff too? And God created us to be in community. But a lot of times we, like, build up these little kingdoms and they're like, I need to own everything I need in this house. Why?

Speaker 00:37:06  For that one time every other year that I.

Speaker 00:37:08  Yes. Like, why do I need to own it? Yeah, yeah. And it just encourages us to like, lean on our community more, which has been really, really good. Wonderful. Yeah.

Speaker 00:37:18  So one last encouragement, and then I'll love it. Bring it. But I just can't stop thinking about. Seek first the kingdom and all these things be added to you.

Speaker 00:37:27  Like we have seen that time and time again. Especially when we started to make these adjustments in our life. every need like actual need that we had God supplied in miraculous ways, in silly ways that were like, why did you even like, we didn't need that, God, but you gave it to us like, yeah. and so that's that's what this is like. You make margin, you start to seek the kingdom of God in your own life first. And just all these other things like God takes care of.

Speaker 00:37:59  Yeah. I mean, it's I don't want to get emotional, so I'm going to try not to, but we just had this experience where we needed to buy a crib because we had given our crib to my brother and sister in law, who had our beautiful nephew. so we gave them our crib because we were like, we're not using it right now, and I don't know if we're going to use it again. Well, now we need a crib again. And we had one picked out that was perfect for our itty bitty house that we really wanted to get, but it was a lot of money.

Speaker 00:38:25  And, but before we were about to buy it, like, I just felt like God telling me like, go look on Facebook Marketplace. I'm like, God, I'm not gonna find this exact, like, very specific.

Speaker 00:38:36  We don't even use Facebook. You know this?

Speaker 00:38:38  Yeah, I had to, like, we had to deep dive to find your password to your Facebook to even get on Facebook Marketplace. But not only was there one posted, there was two of the exact crib in the exact color that I was about to order that day for, like almost $400 cheaper. Yeah, yeah. And that night, as I'm laying in bed, I'm like, oh, I can't even say it without crying because everything feels like a blessing in this season of life. Like I was like, man, Jesus, you didn't have a crib. And he gave us one. And it just feels like you just you recognize the gifts of, like, everything in your house is a gift from God And everything in my life is a gift from God, whether it's my community.

Speaker 00:39:19  Like the items in our house, our income, whatever it is. Yeah, we have less. Less.

Speaker 00:39:25  Without simplicity, I truly believe this. We're blind to the blessings of God. He's just showering blessings over us.

Speaker 00:39:31  Yeah, I think that the magnitude of the busyness and the amount of stuff we have has made us unable to be grateful. Yeah, because we have more than even we would ever want. So nothing feels special to us any longer. Yeah, I, I think as we close, I was thinking of, the richer, great Richard Foster, who wrote on the spiritual disciplines and just pursuing a life with God. And he said, I think really captures what you guys have said so clearly, is that simplicity is the inward reality of a single hearted focus upon God and His kingdom. And that's where it starts. It's what you guys have said. It's this inward journey that expresses itself outwardly as you're like, okay, I want this single hearted focus upon God in this kingdom, and I'm going to align my outward life with that to make that true.

Speaker 00:40:25  Because our outward lives reflect our inward lives. They're attached to each other. And thank you guys for sharing how God has led you guys in the testimony of what he's done in that journey. I think it's going to really encourage others to pursue that too.

Speaker 00:40:40  Yeah, that's what we hope.

Speaker 00:40:41  So thank you for joining us on the new Reality podcast. I hope you come back for the next episode.

Speaker 1 00:40:49  Thanks for tuning in to the Pursue Reality podcast. Reality church is a local church in Lancaster County, Pennsylvania. To learn more or get connected, visit us at Pursue Reality.