
Balance & Beyond
Balance and Beyond is the podcast for ambitious women refusing to accept burnout as the price of success. Here, we’re committed to empowering you with the tools and strategies you need to achieve true balance, where your career, relationships and health all thrive and where you have the power to define success on your own terms.
Balance & Beyond
Moment: Why You Can’t Figure it All Out
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Welcome to Balance and Beyond Moments, your weekly dose of insight, wisdom and mindset shifts, all in 10 minutes or less. Whether it's a powerful truth, a fresh perspective or a spark of inspiration, this is your space to pause, reflect and reset. Let's dive in. Welcome to today's episode, where I'm joined by Jacqueline again, our wonderful mindset coach here at the Balance Institute, and we're going to talk about a hidden superpower that we have as women, that many of you are not using, and it's a little bit different than you think.
Speaker 2:Welcome, jacqueline. Thank you, I love what you just said. It's a little bit different than you think. I think that points us in the direction of where we're headed it does so, talking of thinking or thinking of thinking.
Speaker 1:one of the things that we talk a lot about here at the Balance Institute is our heads and how we spend a lot of time in it. So, jacqueline, share with us what do you see about the women, particularly, who start early on in their journey with us? Where are they primarily operating in their life from?
Speaker 2:Right From their heads, which another way of saying that is from their intellect or logical brain. So pretty much everything in life is solution oriented, just trying to figure it all out, kind of muscle that's being used, and it's definitely something that we're, as a society, over-functioning in and and unfortunately, you know, as women it's. You know, the beautiful thing is that we've become so powerful in the professional workforce. The tragic thing about being so powerful in the workforce is that we've lost the muscle that we don't tend to use as much in the professional realm, because the professional realm we do thrive with using our mind, our intellect, our figuring out brain, our seeking solutions. I mean, that's why we are functioning in the profession. Right, usually that's what's required. But there is, there's another muscle that we've lost along the way. That used to be our superpower as women, before we really joined the workforce and became professionals, really full time, and so that's the segue, but I just wanted to set us up for that.
Speaker 1:Yeah, Well, before we go there, let's leave everyone in suspense for a little bit longer. What is it costing us? We spend our lives in our head, as you said, making sense, figuring it out, trying to think of the option. When we are living in our heads, what do we see? Some typical symptoms of women. So if someone's listening to this going oh, am I in my head? Apart from those questions, what else is going on in their life to indicate that that's perhaps not working as well as it could be?
Speaker 2:Hmm, well, generally they're going to feel resentful about their life, and the reason why is because they can't figure out how to make their life work and because we're going to get to the punchline here. Everyone don't worry, there is another way that you need to, another muscle you need to access to have a life that works or feels good to you, and it's not found in the intellect, it's getting your life to work or feel good is not something that you can figure out or find via logic. In fact and I know that might stump so many of us because so much of that does work and is critical in the professional world, and that's why it's maddening, because it's like well, it works here. Why isn't it working in my life, like with my marriage, or why isn't it working with parenting? You know, I'll say that in some capacities it does work. Sometimes we do need our logic for sure and solution-based deduction. We need that for sure in our marriages and our parenting, but there's a limit to that, and that's what we're pointing to in this episode.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and I think also what's important to point out is that there is a limit to how much fulfillment we find in a life that makes sense. So we might have all the markers of success. We've got the title, the salary, the house, the cars, tick, the kids, we've got the partner, we've done all that and yet we find ourselves looking at life going I've done everything I was meant to do, I thought it was going to feel good, I thought I'd feel better, but, as you said, I'm resentful and I'm grumpy and I'm tired and we can't figure it out because we've done everything we were meant to do and everything that logic said and we followed the path and it's not working.
Speaker 2:Yep, that's a scary place to be right. It's like I did everything I was supposed to do Then why am I not happy? And so we can't figure this out, which is what brings many women to work with us. Jo right Is trying to figure this out and they're stumped and resentful and burnt out and for good reason, because actually I love that I use that word right now because their life has become too reasonable, and that's a funny way to say it. But what I mean is that they don't allow for their imagination, or they don't allow for other possibilities that might seem unreasonable, or they don't allow for possibilities that might shake the status quo or interrupt their perfectly painted picture of this is what a good life should look like, because somewhere along the line, they lost the thread of what actually genuinely brings them joy, and I'm not saying that their job or their husband or their kids don't bring them joy.
Speaker 2:It's something in the relating to they're relating to their work, they're relating to their partner, they're relating to their kids and, probably most importantly, they're relating to themselves. That gets lost along the way. Work doesn't ask us that question. Hey, how are you in relationship to yourself? Does this feel true for you. Is this actually nourishing? No, we're actually asked to not investigate that and just perform and succeed and function and deliver deliverables and punch out at the end of the day or maybe not even then.
Speaker 1:Let's not leave them in suspense any longer. What then, is this hidden superpower? If it's not our heads? What then is this gift, this ability that we all have, that we've numbed?
Speaker 2:Yeah, oftentimes we call it our heart, intelligence, or some people call it intuition, and we mean that in a really grounded way. Some people call it could even be instinct. I like calling it a deeper inner knowing. It's the kind of knowing that when you slow down and you're really honest and it usually it feels like a little bit, maybe vulnerable to admit it, like if you really admit what you really want it's this and you know that spot, you know that spot. It just depends if you give yourself permission to go there.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and what's interesting is usually as parents, particularly mothers, there is a level of mother's intuition that we can access. So I don't know about you, but I know you're one, still little but you can look at a child and nothing about them says they've been naughty. But there's something in you that goes you're up to something. Or you look at them and go something bad's about to happen. Or I look at my daughter and everyone would go and I'd say she needs to pee. They look at me and go how do you know she's fine, like I know she needs to pee?
Speaker 1:There's an intuition, there's an instinct, there's an inner knowing that we, after a little while, stop questioning. So we have access to it. But it can be so much richer if we allow it to penetrate more areas of our lives and particularly if we can access that at work and put this making sense down for a little bit and build this muscle. So, jacqueline, what happens? I guess, where does this intuition lie? If it's not in our head and it doesn't make sense, where do we find it?
Speaker 2:I mean, we talk about it being located in the heart and that's kind of a nebulous concept, but when you check in with your intuition, you'll usually feel a sensation in your body that often is located somewhere around your heart space, right, like we all feel those, um, like a pain in our heart or we feel a twinge or something. So that kind of that experience like you're onto something. It might feel like secretive almost, or even, like I mentioned before, vulnerable, to admit, but you can feel it there's, you do get this sensation in your body. It might feel like a spark, like you're coming back to life. It might feel a little giddy. In fact, it's like you're feeling something that feels true, that you haven't let yourself admit for a long time feeling something that feels true, that you haven't let yourself admit for a long time.
Speaker 1:Thanks for taking this moment for yourself. If this resonated, share it with a friend who needs to hear it today, and don't forget to subscribe to Balance and Beyond for full episodes and more of these bite-sized breakthroughs. See you next time.