145. Process vs. Product: Why Being In the Moment Changes Everything

How much of your life are you actually experiencing… and how much of it are you trying to finish?

In this episode, Dr. Amy Backos explores the difference between process and product — and why our culture’s obsession with outcomes quietly steals so much of our satisfaction, creativity, and peace. From childhood art classes to professional life, we’re often taught to focus on what we produce: the paycheck, the clean house, the finished painting, the perfect result. But art therapy, mindfulness research, and neuroscience all point in another direction. Well-being comes from how we engage with the experience itself.

Amy shares how shifting your attention from outcome to process can transform everyday life — your work, your relationships, your creative practice, even washing the dishes. When you learn to stay present with what you’re doing instead of rushing toward what you’ll get, tasks become more meaningful, mistakes feel lighter, and pleasure is no longer postponed. You don’t have to wait until everything is finished to feel good.

This episode offers a practical and compassionate reframe for modern women who are tired of chasing the next milestone and ready to enjoy their lives as they’re happening — one small, intentional moment at a time.

In this episode, you’ll explore:

• The art therapy distinction between process and product
• Why outcome-focused thinking increases stress and perfectionism
• How mindfulness and creativity increase everyday satisfaction
• Simple ways to bring more presence and pleasure into ordinary tasks
• How process-orientation supports psychological flexibility and resilience

If you’re craving a slower, richer, more creative way of living — this conversation is for you.

Transcript

How much do you like what you're doing these days? Now, there is a difference between what you're doing to produce something and what you're doing to experience something. Now, most of the time we're trying to produce something. We go to work to produce a paycheck. We go to work to enact change, develop something, whatever it is we're doing at work. There is a goal in mind. However, we have so many options about the attitude that we bring to our work and how much we decide we are going to enjoy the process of being at work. Now, this holds true for almost every aspect of our life. There is process and there is product. In today's episode, I'm getting into the details and how it relates to your art, your work, your relationships, and how you can take this really simple concept and apply it in a way that makes your life more enjoyable. Now we need this more than ever these days and we're going to get into it. 

Thank you so much for joining me here on the Modern Creative Woman podcast. I'm Doctor Amy Backos, I'm a licensed psychologist. I'm a registered and board certified art therapist, and I'm bringing you 30 years of experience with the hope that you start to understand how you can apply the art and science of creativity into your own life. So let's get into this. Let's get this started. 

I remember a lot about my art classes growing up, and I knew that doing art in school was very, very different from what it was like to do art at home. And both my parents are really interested in art. My mom's an incredible artist, and she would draw for me, and I could use those as coloring pages so we would create something together. I was never allowed to have a coloring book, because she wanted me to express myself and not simply engage in the task of coloring. She wanted me to be expressive. However, when I went to school, we were all expected to create the exact same project. In the winter, we would create fluffy little snowmen and all 20 of our snowmen would be posted on the hallway wall. And I thought this was kind of not that great of a project, that we all did the same thing. And I remember feeling really disappointed by art class all through elementary school. I also noticed that the art looked pretty different, even though we were all creating the same thing. Flowers in spring, leaves in the fall. The art showed different kind of process and some kids really enjoyed making the art. Some kids seem to find it as a task that required them to be kind of perfect, and I could see they were applying these very detailed aspects to their artwork. I was not that kid, nor was I the one that was so messy and expressive. I felt a little bored, and you could kind of probably tell in my flowers and snowmen each year. It was much later that I came to understand the process of making something is really different than the product of making something, and when I was getting my degree in art therapy, there was so much conversation, and there is so much written about the difference between process and product. Let me explain what I mean about that. In art therapy, the process of making art starts. When you think of the idea, you start moving your supplies around, getting things ready. The process is how interested you are, how much attention you're giving and and how focused you are. It then moves into the act of creating, painting or drawing, sculpting, whatever it is, and that way that you're doing it, how you're engaged with it. Not just the materials, but your own inner experience in that moment. If you're expressing something that happened versus an emotion or trying to create something that's really like aesthetically pleasing. All of that is process. When it's all done, art supplies are put away and all you have left is your product. Your piece of art that you made. And often in our therapy, we're not really at all talking about the product. We'll use the product, that piece of art, to facilitate conversation about the process. And what was it like to create this particular painting, or what does it, um, feel like when you added these additional lines? The idea that the product is most important, I think fits really well with capitalism. We're supposed to produce things, we're supposed to create widgets that we can sell. The product is so overvalued in society that it often comes as a quite a shock for people to learn how to focus on the process. When you learn how to focus on the process, everything changes. It becomes so much more pleasurable to do whatever it is you're doing. It requires certainly, that you're engaged in the present moment. It requires your attention. And we always feel better if we're in the present moment. All the research shows that even if you're doing something that you dislike and could be driving your car in a lot of traffic, but if you're present for it, you're paying attention. You're allowing your mind to stay focused on the task, not drifting into highway hypnosis. You will feel happier if you're washing dishes and you're just paying attention to washing dishes. Instead of getting lost in your thoughts, you will enjoy it more and you'll have a better sense of what's happening for yourself. Process versus product requires all of us to keep broadening our mind. We have to think often about differentiating between the process and the product. So remember, the process is the whole experience. It is not hyper focused on the end goal. It is about staying in the present moment while you're doing whatever it is you're doing, while you're moving the POS across your paper, or while you're moving the sponge across the dish. That's the process, the whole experience. The goal is nice. You'll have a piece of art. You'll have a clean dish. However, it's hyper focus to only think about the dish being clean while it's not. Now remember, product is that end piece. The piece of art. Finished batch of cookies a finished knit scarf, a holiday meal is the end goal of the preparations that took three days to create a meal. However, the process is what we can really hang on to and savor. A meal is over quickly. Even a holiday meal doesn't go on for as long as it takes to prepare it. So the process of enjoying it. You've probably had meals with people who really enjoyed cooking, and you can tell that they feel proud of what they made, and they're sitting down and enjoying the company and oh, the rolls got burned, but oh well, that's okay. And you've probably sat with people who are less interested in forgiving the burnt rolls, and they become really fixated on, oh, no, this one thing did not work. Something's terribly wrong. I want to invite you to focus on the process, because when we're in the process, everything is more enjoyable. I made a list of examples that you maybe can relate to. A product might be a knit shawl. I have knit so many shawls I have knit shawls that my grandmother made. It is the finished product. However, the process of knitting a shawl requires my thinking, my planning. I have to sketch it out, write a pattern, select some yarn, do a lot of knitting, dozens and dozens of hours. Bind off, block it. Just figure out how I want to style it. So the product, the knit shawl. I could just be thinking about the end product this whole time. However, if I stay in the moment, I can notice that I'm gaining knitting experience. I'm learning a new pattern. I'm also doing hours of meditation. If it's a gift for someone else, I'm thinking about them while I'm knitting. If I'm in the process and in the moment, I can feel a lot of pride in my craft, in my ongoing relationship with my materials, with my knitting community. And it's not just about the shawl. It's about my experience of making the shawl. Now, process also includes my attitude. Now I can try and knit in a hurry or knit the night before. I want to give a gift. Those are terrible ideas. I've done them. However, when I'm knitting at my leisure, I'm realistic about the product or the time it's going to take. I enjoy it, so the psychological research of enjoying the process is really emphasizing the journey instead of fixating solely on the outcome. I mean, the outcome of life is ultimately death. We better focus on the journey. This is what we have. As I mentioned before, our therapy emphasizes the process of creation with very little focus on a finished product. Now, engaging with the steps and process of an activity has an important impact on our brain. It's fostering growth. It's creating new neural connections to be in the present moment. It's also increasing our self-reported satisfaction. That's the research way of saying do we like what's happening? It also improves our subjective well-being. And that is like, do I feel like I'm doing pretty well right now? So things like solving a problem, of course, making art, celebrating a holiday, playing a sport. Singing in a choir. Planning a vacation. Preparing a meal. All of these benefit from process and staying in the moment. I want to share a few of the benefits of engaging with the process. It involves mindfulness and contact with the present moment, and it is only from this space of the present moment can we engage in psychological flexibility. The act of being present calms us down, helps us self-regulate, and it gives us a more. Clear picture of things, and we might be washing the dishes and thinking about the dishes, but our mind is still working in the background and we can better solve problems the next day when we've taken time to be mindful today. Process also helps us avoid black and white thinking, and that's all or nothing. It's when we can only imagine that the dinner will be perfect or it will be terrible. So if it's not perfect, then it's terrible. If the rolls are burned, then dinner is terrible. And that's simply not true. Most people would never even notice if you didn't put the rolls on the table. Process also has this incredible benefit of allowing success to be easier. Yes, easier. When we come to understand that we do not have to be 100% at anything, and success suddenly becomes easier if we're only striving to make it to the gym every single day. And if we miss, we're terrible, then we're going to suffer. And success will not seem so easy because when we inevitably miss a day, then we quit. So this kind of focus on the outcome. Causes us to quit long before success would even be possible. The idea of meditation fits in really well here. The benefit of enjoying the process and simply being present allows meditation to be easier. And I always talk with the women I work with about figuring out a meditative practice. Could be a zazen sitting meditation. It could be a daily walk. It could be looking out the window. There's a lot of different ways to do meditation. Of course, the dishwashing meditation by touch, not on the hugging meditation. All of these experiences of meditation help us enjoy the process. That practice of meditation gets us in the mood for. Kind of what's our appetite for noticing the process of many other things. Now, a lot of therapists I work with and that I supervise, I encourage them to recommend meditation. And unfortunately many will say it's too hard. That if they don't have their own meditative practice, they don't know how they could teach it. And I challenge them every time you do have a meditative practice, you have to look around and find it. You already are doing something that's meditated. Some people really enjoy driving. Some people enjoy their walk. It's happening and you can just tap into what you're already doing. And when people figure that out, well, there you go. You're off and running. It doesn't have to be a special sitting meditation. You'll be able to find it. And I never give up on people when clients say I can't meditate. It's not for me. I help them find a way to do it. The benefit of process on pleasure is tremendous. And we can start to focus on our values and our value based actions towards pleasure. And this could be eating. It could be the pleasure of going for a walk. It could be wearing sumptuous fabric, like a wool or cashmere that feels really good on your skin, value based. It feels good to you and the pleasure are possible for the entire experience, not just at the end. You might save up to buy a cashmere sweater, then you have it at the end. Nope, that's not how it goes. The process means you're saving up. You're looking around for the perfect color sweater. Then you purchase it, and every time you wear it, you're also engaged in that process. You're enjoying what you purchased. You're enjoying how it feels, and you are no longer just throwing on a sweater. Every moment becomes pleasurable. Our pleasure doesn't have to be at the end, and the end is often not really the end. Every time you wear your special sweater, it feels good and you can notice it. And the process continues. And finally, one of the really important benefits of process is you do not have to wait to feel good. It is completely unnecessary for you to kick it down the road a bit to feel good. It's allowed to happen now. Process means you quit saying things like one day when I have time, I will set up my art studio. You stop saying one day when I feel better in my body, I will wear the clothes I love. Those are the kinds of things that are about product. I will have a product. I will do this thing later when there is time. Process is I'm really excited about my art studio. What can I do to get something set up today? Even though I don't have a space yet, I can set aside a little basket that I keep by my desk that has the art supplies that I can quickly grab and make some art today. There's no need to delay your enjoyment. You're allowed to figure out this is the process. How will I enjoy it? If you're waiting to buy a new sweater, you can enjoy the process of anticipation. If you're waiting to set up your art studio, you can enjoy that process as well and just create a space for your art supplies now. Process versus product. I want to remind you, you have enough. You are enough, and you're already engaged in the process. If you're dreaming of something, leaving your job, starting a business, the process is already underway. It's already happening. You are in the process. You don't need to delay the experience, the process by anticipating the end. Because a perfect website does not exist on the first try. A perfect business does not exist on the first try, but the process of creating those things can be enjoyable all the way through. So now that you know all about process versus product, how will you use this information? What will you create in terms of a process moment? I want to give you one little suggestion. You can do it right now. Just notice what's happening. Are you sitting? Are you walking? What are you wearing? What's happening? What else do you hear? Are you drinking coffee? Just notice everything around you. That's the process. So the process of listening to this includes all of that. And what you're doing is kind of this bigger picture experience of learning about creativity, of improving your day to day life that's happening right this very moment. It's not down the road. It's happening now. The process is already underway. Let me know what you think. I would love to hear from you in the show notes. And if you are curious about Paris, we are offering a couple conversations just to see if it might be a good fit for you. And they are happening in March. So March 9th and 16th noon eastern time, 9 a.m. Pacific, 6 p.m. Paris time. And my Parisian partner, Aurora Duvall and I will be chatting about a couple of things. One is about her living in Paris and what it's like, and we'll be talking about creativity. So if you are interested, you can find the link in the show notes, and you can also find the information on Instagram or the Modern Creative Woman website. Thank you so much for being here and I look forward to speaking with you again in the next episode.