164. The 3 Biggest Barriers to Creativity (and How to Move Past Them)

Why do so many intelligent, capable women long to be creative but never quite begin?

In this episode, Dr. Amy Backos explores three surprisingly common mental barriers that keep women from painting, writing, making art, and expressing themselves creatively. These obstacles aren't a lack of talent or time. They're patterns of thinking that quietly pull us away from the creative life we want.

Drawing from psychology, art therapy, and over thirty years of clinical experience, Amy explains why creativity actually increases with age, how life experience becomes a powerful creative resource, and what practical steps you can take this week to reconnect with your creative self.

You'll also learn why thoughts are not facts, why over-scheduling quietly steals creativity, and how making space for "nothing" can become one of the most productive things you do.

In this episode, you'll discover:

• Why women often become more creative as they get older
• How creativity grows by combining past experiences into something new
• The first barrier: spending too much energy worrying about what other people think
• The second barrier: conflicting values without a clear plan
• The third barrier: believing every thought your mind produces
• Why thoughts are biological events, not objective truths
• How over-scheduling leaves little room for creativity or reflection
• The importance of protecting unstructured time
• Why art naturally strengthens present-moment awareness
• Journaling practices that deepen self-understanding without requiring a daily habit
• A simple affirmation to help you move toward your values instead of away from them

This Week's Creative Invitation

This week, choose one small action:

• Block off 20 minutes of unscheduled time and resist filling it with chores.
• Schedule one uninterrupted hour to make art, write, knit, paint, collage, or simply play.
• Spend time journaling without worrying about doing it "the right way." Write freely, doodle, or write a letter to your future self.

Small, consistent moments of creativity help retrain your brain to notice possibility instead of obstacles.

Memorable Quote

"The only barriers to your creative expression are inside your mind, and thoughts are not facts."

Affirmation

I am a modern creative woman, and I can figure this out.

Resources Mentioned

• Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT)
• Present-moment awareness and psychological flexibility
• The concept of flow
• Journaling as a tool for reflection and creativity

If this episode resonated with you, I'd love to hear from you. Send me a message on Instagram or leave a comment. Your support, whether it's sharing the podcast with a friend or becoming a small monthly supporter, helps keep The Modern Creative Woman ad-free and allows us to continue exploring the art and science of creativity together.

Transcript

The only barriers to your creative expression are inside your mind in the form of thoughts. They might be memories. They might be self-critical thoughts, comparative thoughts, judgmental thoughts. But they're all thoughts. And thoughts are not facts. So these barriers are completely changeable. Today we're talking about three barriers that interfere with our creative process, and I'll give you some tips to overcome them. So let's get into this. Let's get this started. 

Welcome into the Modern Creative Woman podcast where we are talking about the art and science of creativity. I'm Doctor Amy Bakos. I'm a licensed psychologist, a registered and board certified art therapist, and I'm bringing you over three decades worth of experience to enhance your creativity. I've been thinking a lot about who are the modern creative woman, specifically this community. And I started making a list. The women are smart and they're craving creativity. And for many people, it's a return to their creativity that just got pushed to the side during the years of school, work, parenting, taking care of parents, how life demands of us to perform, excel and take care of people that we love. And there is a strong, incredible wish to return to that state of creativity. Now the really cool news is we get more creative as we age. Why? We have more life experience so we have more experiences on which we can draw. And creativity is most often synthetic creativity. That is putting two things together to create something new and different. So when you start to tell a story in different ways, you have a new creative opportunity for yourself. When you take the time to explore yourself through art, poetry, music. You are doing some synthesizing. It's not just integrating your past and your present and imagining your future. You're really using the synthetic creativity by putting new things together. For example, an old childhood story, plus your current life experience and perspective can allow you to feel really quite differently about what was a troubling experience from childhood. And art certainly makes that the most possible. It is really the fastest way that I know to get in touch with yourself and understand yourself. Adding play to your process speeds up learning, which is incredible. Children playing learn all kinds of things. Adults playing can learn all kinds of new things. 

Some of you are telling me, yeah, yeah, Amy, I know I want to be more creative. I want to get involved in my creative process. And yet I'm not. And over and over, women talk themselves out of engaging in creativity, taking an art class, working with an art therapist, setting aside time to draw or knit or paint. So I've identified three barriers that maybe you can relate to. You might find that some of these are getting in the way of your creativity. We all know we need a lot of creativity in our life for longevity, for health, for knowing ourselves and others in our communities. The list of physical health benefits is growing every year, and yet so many women keep telling me they're not taking the time. And I think some of this involves making a commitment and an investment. Sometimes it's signing up for and paying for your classes in advance. Working with an art therapist. There's inherently an accountability person, and that person can teach you what you need to know. 

But the three barriers that can really get in our way. The first one is spending your time thinking about what other people think of you. Instead of spending your time thinking about your desires or thinking about what you want to think of you, I'm going to repeat this one. A huge barrier to taking steps towards your creative thought is spending your time thinking about what others are thinking of you, instead of spending time thinking about what you truly desire. You know this famous phrase from Descartes, I think, therefore I am. I don't entirely agree with that. However, it's a good point of contrast. Descartes did not say, I think about what other people think of me, therefore I am. See the difference? As a philosopher, Descartes is speaking about how to know who you are, and consciousness is essentially what he's referring to. If we're spending all our conscious time wondering what other people think. We're really in trouble, and it sneaks up in insidious ways. I think most of us like to imagine we've let go of worrying about that kind of stuff after we left high school. Yet it keeps showing up over and over again. We might worry what the neighbor thinks if we plant flowers too close to the line. It might be that we wonder what someone at work thinks of our work. We might start imagining that there are people judging us, and so we're too embarrassed to start an art project. Take an exercise class. Anything that you want to do. When a thought interferes, it's just you thinking about you, and you're spending your thinking time. Thinking about what others think of you is a huge barrier. The second barrier that I see most often is having conflicting values without a creative plan. Now we all have a set of values that guide our life, and the more conscious and intentional we are with these values, the more likely we are to feel satisfied, happy, and really just enjoy our lives. But also it gives us an opportunity to not feel so rushed, not feel so stressed because we know what's most important now. Conflicting values are you want to work out, but you also want to paint. You want to eat healthy, but you also want to enjoy yourself at a friend's birthday party. You want to socialize and you want to finish your book. All of these are important things to do, and without a conscious plan for how to deal with conflicting values, will end up doing all kinds of things and then feeling guilty because we didn't do the other things. It's fine to have conflicting values. I love to read. Sometimes it might cut into my painting time or vice versa. I've really had to practice not feeling guilty or upset at myself for not structuring things the way I want them to be. My latest conflicting plans are going to bed early and also spending time with my teenage son, who is sort of more wide awake when I'm getting ready for bed. So sometimes I stay up late because I want to hang out. Other times I get to bed on time, but I don't feel bad either way. I will sleep in a little bit later the next day if I stay up late. It all is okay because all of that is important to me. This shows up a lot for people in over scheduling. Now if we over schedule ourselves, we want to join too many activities or accomplish so many things. What happens is the desire to accomplish it all interferes with accomplishing any of it. A singular focus gives us exactly what we need to accomplish a task. Some of the best career advice I got from Doctor Doris Arrington. She's a art therapist who started the art therapy program at Notre Dame de Namur. She said, do not over schedule. Leave lots and lots of time in the day to deal with whatever shows up. And I found she was absolutely right. The moment I stopped over scheduling myself or booking every hour on my calendar gave me so much more freedom. I had time to think and reflect on what I was doing when there was something urgent that appeared at work. I had time to deal with it so it did not feel like a hassle or a rush. If some one wasn't planning and they needed urgent response from me, I could do that. It also serves as a way to be present for friends and family. If I'm overscheduled, I end up working instead of being present. It shows up in our friendships as well. If we are trying to do too many things, our friends can tell. We're not focused. We're not present. We say no so many times. Eventually they'll stop asking us out. And the third barrier that I notice for a lot of women who are putting off taking action on their creativity, is believing their thoughts. I've talked about this over and over on the podcast that thoughts are a biological process. It's one neuron firing across the synapse to another neuron. Your heart beats, your stomach digests, your lungs breathe and your brain thinks. And unlike what Descartes says, thinking is not the seat of our self. It is not our essence. It is not our core. It's not the you that has experienced everything. Thoughts are just neurons firing. When you start believing your thoughts to be facts, we get into a lot of trouble. A lot of women say, I'm not creative. I don't know how to make art. I'm going to be bad at this. I don't want to try because it's going to look terrible. I don't have time. All of these things are thoughts that are just words in your head. They're not facts. There's no objective way to say, oh, yes, you are not creative. There's no way that that's true. Having time is something that we decide. So thinking back to conflicting values, how are we going to spend our time? I remember when I was getting my master's degree, I would start to feel so self-conscious about my artwork, and I would feel like, judgmental of myself in the art. And while I was making it, I would just feel kind of crummy. And then one day I realized, why am I doing this to myself? It's my choice how I feel about my art. It is up to me to feel the way I want to feel. Making art I love making art, but in the classroom I would feel so self-conscious and I decided I was paying attention to these thoughts instead of to the art process. And the moment I recognized I was doing that, I relaxed, I enjoyed it, everything was fine. I stopped thinking about being judged. I stopped judging myself, and I could live. The experience of making art in beautiful studios to move past these three barriers, which is the first one spending time thinking about what other people think to having no action plan for your conflicting values, and three believing your thoughts. These three barriers are not so difficult to overcome. So I want to give you a few ideas. The first one is conflicting values needs attention right away. Deciding what's most important. And doing that first in the day is old business advice, and it makes sense from a psychological perspective. If something is the most important thing, you're going to think about it all day long. If you're not doing it, if it gets done first, you can free your mind up to be present for the other things. And at the end of the day, you know that you will have accomplished the most important of your tasks. The second, believing your thoughts or spending time thinking about what other people are thinking is a little more involved. However, it's mostly about being in the present moment, recognizing when you're thinking things because thoughts aren't facts. It's recognizing that if you're thinking about something, you're maybe not in the exact moment. When you make art, you're practicing present moment awareness. And the more you're making art, the more you're engaging in the exact opposite of thinking, believing thoughts and thinking about what other people are thinking. It gives you the opportunity to drop into flow. It helps your brain recognize that flow state, and then you can drop into it in a much more gentle fashion. It's not such a struggle. Later on. A specific, committed action that you could engage in this week is to block off time in your schedule for nothingness, to allow yourself the opportunity to luxuriate on the sofa, to make art, to read a book, whatever it is that you feel like doing in that moment. And you can just block off 20 minutes. What I want you to avoid doing is things that are on your never ending to do list, like laundry or dishes or tidying. This is about choosing something that is. Nothing. You can of course do something, but not those things that you're gonna end up doing anyway. This is about a conscious choice to create space and see what shows up. Another way you can do this is to block off an hour to make art. You can paint, you can draw, you can do a collage. There's so many ways for you to engage in the arts that really give your brain a rest. It's refreshing. It gives you creative rest and the opportunity to start to know yourself a little bit better. And the third idea is block off sometime this week for journaling so many women. When I suggest journaling, say no. That never worked for me. I've tried and I never stuck to it. There's no rule that says you must journal every morning or once a week. There's no rule. There's just I need to journal and sort some things out in my head. So I'll pull out my journal and write. It's not a failure if someone doesn't have a practice that looks like somebody else's. Journaling is a very powerful tool. I like to doodle in my journal while I'm writing. You can write a letter to your future self. You can write a letter back from your future self to you. There are many ways. There's two way prayer. There's free writing where you just keep your pen moving the whole time. You don't lift your pen up, you just keep writing whatever comes to mind. You write it down. Even if you're writing a little bit of I don't know what to write next. The possibilities of knowing yourself more through writing are very high. It's a powerful tool. Our brains can use the direction consciously. Choosing some thoughts and expressing our unconscious thoughts is wildly helpful, especially during times of transition. And I'll end with an affirmation that I'd like to share with you the idea of adding in thoughts, even if you don't believe them, but you're adding in thoughts that point you in the direction of your values, has a long history in philosophy and religion and self-help and psychology. So I like to say I am a modern, creative woman and I can figure this out. I am a modern, creative woman and I can figure this out. So try that one on for size and let me know what you think. Thank you so much for being here. I really appreciate all your messages and your support for this show. I especially appreciate the women who are doing the small contribution. 3 or $5 a month helps offset the cost of the podcast, keeps us ad free, which I think is really important in this day and age that there is a space where we're not getting pop ups and intrusive commercials in the middle of it. If you drop me a note in the show notes or on Instagram, I promise I'll write you back. Have a wonderful rest of your day and I will speak with you in the next episode.