How to Work with Different Personality Types in Ministry (Without Losing Your Mind!)

Embracing diverse personalities within church staff can lead to a more harmonious and effective ministry. By understanding, adjusting communication styles, and granting grace, team members can leverage each other's strengths and collaborate more effectively. 

• Understanding various personality types enhances teamwork 
• Active listening promotes clearer communication 
• Adjusting communication styles fosters better interactions 
• Granting grace to each other is key in ministry 
• Celebrating differences can lead to team growth 
• Reflecting on frustrating relationships can shift perspectives

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Transcript

Speaker 1 0:07

Church staff teams are full of personality . You've got visionary who's always dreaming big . You've got detailed planners that are always making lists . You have the quiet processors who never really speak in meetings . You have the high-energy leader who never speak in meetings . You have a high-energy leader who never , ever slows down , and sometimes those differences can absolutely drive us crazy . We're going to talk about it today here on the Healthy Church Staff Podcast . My name is Todd Rhodes . I am one of the co-founders over at chemistrystaffingcom and I'm your host here on the podcast for today . And I'm your host here on the podcast for today .

Speaker 1 0:44

So how do we deal with all these really unique personalities that make up our church staff team ? And maybe you don't have staff , maybe you're a solo pastor and you don't have , you know , paid staff . That you know , todd , this doesn't apply to me . This works also not just with paid staff , but also with volunteers and with your board . Everybody brings a different personality to the table . So how do you deal with this ? How do you work with all these different personality types in ministry ? You're all working for Jesus , right ? But how do you do it without losing your freaking mind , right ? Okay , here we go . Three ideas for you today on how to work with people .

Speaker 1 1:32

Okay , first of all , try to understand before you react . Always listen . My mom always said God gave you two ears and one mouth for a reason . It's true . Try and understand before you react because , truthfully , people don't wake up in the morning thinking how can I be difficult today ? All right , most people don't . Okay , I've met a few people . I'm convinced that they do wake up in the morning saying how can I be a thorn in ? I'm going to be a thorn for Todd today . Most people don't , though , understand . Try to understand before you react . Okay .

Speaker 1 2:12

When personality clashes happen , we often misunderstand why people behave the way that they do . The detail-oriented person probably , if you really think about it , is not trying to be difficult when they ask for more clarity , they just need more structure . Okay , they ask for more clarity , they just need more structure . The big picture visionary person isn't ignoring details just to annoy you or tick you off . You may think they are , but they're not . They're big picture visionary people . They genuinely don't see those details that you do as a detailed person . They don't see them as a priority . We'll figure that out when we get there , but it's going to drive you crazy . The quiet introvert isn't disengaged in staff meetings . They're just processing internally before they speak and again , that's me Instead of getting frustrated , start by asking why does this person think this way ?

Speaker 1 3:00

A little bit of understanding really does go a long way . So the first thing you need to do is , before you talk , before you instantly jump to conclusions , before you get upset , understand the type of person and understand why they are probably acting the way they are , before you immediately jump to conclusions . All right , that's the first one . Number two , when you can flex your own communication style If you lead a team , your job isn't just to expect everybody to adjust to you .

Speaker 1 3:32

You also need to adjust to them . And for your direct , no-nonsense team member , maybe you need to just be clear and to the point . Maybe you're talking with your more relational person , your people first staff member . Maybe you need to take an extra minute with that person because you know how they are , how they're wired , how God's wired them . Maybe you need to take a minute with them and , personally , just jump in , get with them personally , take a little bit of extra time before jumping into the work because they're more relational .

Speaker 1 4:01

Maybe for your structured person , you need to give them the details . They're more process-driven anyway , so give them details and clear expectations and maybe for somebody that's more spontaneous , an idea-driven colleague , be willing to dream with them before locking down any of the specifics . You don't have to . I'm not asking you to be somebody who you're not . Okay , you don't have to be a chameleon here , but a little intentionality , particularly after you've not jumped to conclusions about what this person is saying and how they're acting . A little bit of intentionality will save you a ton of unnecessary conflict and , as the title of this podcast and video says , it will help you to get along with people and thrive with people without losing your mind .

Speaker 1 4:49

Okay , and then number three , and this is the last one for today . Anyway , give each other some grace . You know , at the end of the day , church work is people work and people are complicated . I heard somebody say once that I would love working at my church if it just wasn't for the people . I know some days we all feel like that . But guess what Church work is ? People work and people are complicated . And you're not going to fix somebody's personality . You can try . It's not going to go well for you , but you can try . But you're not going to fix somebody's personality and , truthfully , that's not your role and you really shouldn't want to do that .

Speaker 1 5:27

The strengths that drive you crazy in one moment are often the exact strengths that your church needs . Might drive you crazy , but it's exactly that person , is exactly the person that needs to be in that chair at that time , even though it drives you nuts . Instead of getting annoyed , what if you learn to appreciate what each personality brings to the table ? That team member who never stops questioning everything might be keeping your church from making a really terrible decision . The colleague who never speaks up in meetings might have some deep wisdom if you really create some space for them to share . That high energy , fast moving leader who never , ever slows down and drives you crazy might be the visionary your church needs for this next season .

Speaker 1 6:11

Different personalities doesn't mean wrong . It just means different , and that's a good thing . Okay , so here's your bottom line for today . Instead of resenting personality differences , start leveraging them . Take five minutes today or this week to reflect on someone you work with who frustrates you . If you can't think of anybody , give me a call . I'll give you a name of somebody who frustrates me and you can work on that as your case study . Ask yourself what strength does this person who annoys me at times , what strength does their personality bring to the table ? How can I adjust my approach to work with them ? I promise just this little shift in perspective can absolutely transform your team dynamics and how you feel about the other people on your team , and the best part of it is you won't lose your mind .

Speaker 1 7:05

I'd love to hear your thoughts on this . Who's the personality type you struggle with the most ? I'd love to hear your story . I love hearing everybody's story . I read every email that comes to me . You can shoot me an email at podcast at chemistrystaffingcom . Seriously , I read every email and if you or your church is struggling to build a team that actually works together , let's talk . I work at chemistry staffing and we can help you find kind of the right fit for your staff culture and if there's a way that I can come alongside and partner with you and your church , I would love to do so . Just reach out to me anytime . Podcast at chemistrystaffingcom . All right , thanks for hanging out with me today . Remember , working with different personalities doesn't have to be painful as long as you don't try to make everyone exactly like you . All right , thanks so much and we'll see you next time .