The Healthy Church Staff Podcast
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The Healthy Church Staff Podcast
The Staff Conflict Playbook
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Conflict on a church staff team isn't always a sign that something's broken. But how do you handle it? That tells the real story and today on the Healthy Church Staff Podcast, we're going to walk through a practical plan for navigating staff conflict without making it worse, whether you're a lead pastor, an executive pastor or in the middle of a mess. Hopefully this will help guide you through to be able to lead with clarity and courage. Hi there, my name is Todd Rhodes. I'm one of the co-founders over at chemistrystaffingcom and also your host right here on the Healthy Church Staff Podcast every Monday through Friday. That tension between two staff members, it's not just awkward, it can be contagious, because a lot of times conflict doesn't stay contained, it leaks into team morale, into church culture and it can even leak into the Sunday experience. So today we're going to talk about what I call a staff conflict playbook. Of course, we're only going to be able to talk a few minutes about this, so it's just going to be the 30,000-foot level. But stay with me and hopefully you'll walk away at the end of the podcast with a four-step framework to help lead your team through conflict without messing everything up worse or losing momentum. So here is where we're going to start without messing everything up worse or losing momentum. Okay, so here is where we're going to start, and this is the first part of the playbook. Okay, normalize that conflict happens. Okay, conflict happens.
Speaker 1:Staff conflict isn't a crisis. It's a guarantee. If you have a passion and gifted and opinionated people, sooner or later. It's not if it's when, sooner or later, there will be some friction. There just will be. What matters most is how you respond. So, when you sense that there's some conflict, some tension, some unease, ask yourself some questions like are we avoiding conflict altogether? Are we escalating conflict unnecessarily or are we using conflict to help create clarity? Because the last question is that's the approach you probably need to take. No, I will say this is the approach you need to take. So first thing is just to remember if you have conflict, that means you're a church and that means you have staff. Okay, no harm, no foul. If there's conflict, it's important how you deal with the conflict, though. Okay. So here's how I would say a four-step conflict playbook, simple framework, nothing too difficult. You might want to write this down, but it's not rocket science here, but this four-step conflict playbook will hopefully help you address conflict on your church staff.
Speaker 1:Okay, the first is to observe, observe, watch for patterns. Is this a recurring situation or is it just a one-off type of a thing? Don't wait until it's toxic. Or is it just a one-off type of a thing? Don't wait until it's toxic, address it early. And you can only do that when you observe.
Speaker 1:Okay, second thing is name it, call it what it is privately, with humility, say, hey, privately, here's what I'm seeing and I want to understand what's behind it. Is there anything to this? So the first thing you're going to do is you're going to observe and when you see something, you're going to name it and you're going to start to have a conversation. And then you're going to navigate it. Okay, what do I mean by navigate? You're going to bring both parties together. Right, there's a conflict, so there has to be more than one party. If there was just one party, it probably wouldn't be a conflict. Bring both parties together if it's appropriate. And then you're going to focus on behaviors, not personalities. Okay, don't focus on personalities.
Speaker 1:The goal of navigating is to seek to restore trust, not just solve the problem. But you do want to solve the problem, but you also want to restore the trust that the breakage of trust. That's why there's conflict, right? Conflict usually always involves some kind of a break in trust. So you want to solve the problem, but you also want to concentrate on restoring the trust between these two parties so that they can work together very well in the future. So, again, first thing you're going to do is you're going to observe. Second step you're going to name it. Third step you're going to navigate it. And the fourth step is you're going to coach it. Okay, you're going to coach it, provide tools for future moments, maybe some communication guides, some expectations. But you don't want to just resolve it, you want to develop your people as they go through it.
Speaker 1:Okay, because here's why. Here's why I say that the win isn't avoidance, it's alignment. Okay, conflict can actually build trust when handled well. Let me repeat that because that's an important point. Conflict, when there's conflict, we always think sometimes conflict gets a bad rap. But conflict, there's good that can come out of conflict. Conflict can actually build trust. Build trust when it's handled well. You can have more trust after a conflict than what you had before the conflict if you handle it well. Some of the best breakthroughs in church staffs and church teams have actually come after the hardest conversations, maybe birthed out of some conflict. Healthy church staff teams aren't the ones that never fight. They're the ones that learn to fight for each other, not against each other. Okay, so here's the bottom line, my final thought for today your staff conflict probably isn't the problem. It's a problem, but it's not the problem. Avoiding your church staff conflict. That is the biggest problem.
Speaker 1:All right, I would love to hear from you. Podcast at chemistrystaffingcom. You can send me an email. Tell me what's one way that you've seen conflict handled well on a team, and maybe the adverse. Maybe share with me podcast at chemistrystaffingcom one way that you've seen conflict blow up and what started? Something small man. It just sparked and somebody threw gas on it and it got totally out of control. I find these stories fascinating. Would love to hear your story and if there's any way that I can help your church ever reach out to me. Podcast at chemistrystaffingcom.
Speaker 1:Hey, while I've got you here, while you're listening or watching, I would love for you to take part in our 2025 Church Staff Health Assessment. It's absolutely free. We ask you 50 questions. At the end of it, you get a report that tells you how you rate across seven different key areas of church health. So if you'd like to take that, you can take that absolutely free of charge at chemistrystaffingcom slash 2025. So chemistrystaffingcom slash 2025. Thanks so much. I'm here every day on the Healthy Church Staff Podcast. Hope you'll join me every Monday through Friday. If you haven't subscribed, go ahead and hit subscribe, or if you're watching or listening, and that way it'll help the algorithms to tell more people about the podcast, but it'll also help you to know when a new podcast is uploaded. All right, thanks so much. Have a great day.
