The ADHD MUMS Pod
Real talk from two ADHD mums in the thick of parenting, chaos, and clutter. Gen and Claire share honest highs and lows of neuro-divergent life. We are Mums, but you don't have to be to listen!
We share real, unfiltered stories about parenting, neurodivergence, and daily struggles like executive dysfunction, disorganisation, overstimulation, and Mum guilt. We also celebrate the wins—big or small—with honesty and laughter.
We're both AFAB and biological mums, but this space is for all parents, ADHDers, curious minds, and —even your pets. Everyone’s welcome.
We do swear though, so you probably need headphones if there's kids around!
The ADHD MUMS Pod
ADVENT CHAOS CALENDAR! How ADHD Parents Navigate School Chaos In December
We lay out a simple survival plan for the school run-up to Christmas: what to prioritize, what to drop, and how to make the chaos lighter with ADHD brains and real budgets. From consent forms to costumes, we share practical systems, community tips, and kinder boundaries.
• using screenshots and a calendar sweep to track dates
• leaning on WhatsApp groups for pinned deadlines and swaps
• choosing low-cost or secondhand jumpers and setting sensory-first rules
• building minimum viable costumes with what you have
• picking battles on donations, fairs and Tombola asks
• appreciating office staff and deciding where gifts matter
• contributing what you can and asking school for support
• simplifying cards and Secret Santa with stamps or limits
• quick teacher gift ideas that kids can make without stress
Further TW: This podcast references at times: alcohol abuse, depression, mood disorders, medical emergency, miscarriage, traffic accidents, grief and loss, teen pregnancy, anxiety, abuse, PDA, low self esteem, and anti-depressant medications, disordered eating, hoarding...
All music written and produced by Ash Doc Horror Lerczak.
Artwork by Gen
For more information about us, our podcast and our ADHD MUMS community, visit OUR WEBSITE.
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Let's get ADHD MUMS up the pod charts and raise awareness when we all need it most!
See you next Wednesday! xxx
It's a roll-up to Christmas and we're on to the HD. We're the ADHD mums. I'm Claire.
SPEAKER_00:Someone wanted in on the action there, that was Carhorn. Um and I'm Jen. And we're talking today about being a school mum.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:The survival guide of being a school mum at Christmas. Yeah. So we're talking about they're doing shit like a Christmas show.
SPEAKER_01:Chris still be going to a pantomime or a trip, maybe.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, so you need to do a consent form. You need to get a form sent home for that. You need to then remember to sign it. You need to remember to send it back. You need to make a payment on some sort of electronic payment system, which ultimate confession time.
SPEAKER_01:Mm-hmm.
SPEAKER_00:My child is halfway through juniors of the same school. I'm still not on the electronic parent pay thing.
SPEAKER_01:Have you managed, babe?
SPEAKER_00:Well, baby, I'm just a cheeky bitch. Um no, I I kind of go up and I ask her dad to pay for some on the electronic thing. And some I just go up and pay by card at the office. The secretary just does me a solid and takes a card payment, and she's fine with her.
SPEAKER_01:Lucky you.
SPEAKER_00:Um yeah. Um what else have we got going on? Christmas fairs. There's teacher gifts. Teacher gifts, Christmas jumper day. You mentioned you've got a choir concert.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:My kids are still little, there's a grotta. You have to book for that, even though it's at the Christmas fair.
SPEAKER_01:Christmas parties in school where they can wear their own clothes. They've got to bring things in, yeah.
SPEAKER_00:Bring a bottle for the Tom Bowler, that's always one around Christmas.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. Cards for them little me that sometimes you have to write for them. Oh my god.
SPEAKER_00:I've never done that.
SPEAKER_01:Have you not?
SPEAKER_00:No.
SPEAKER_01:No.
SPEAKER_00:I give the option for mine to write them. She usually, my eldest, the last couple of years, as written cards, not give them out.
SPEAKER_01:Ki gift for their friends if they wanna do that.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, we haven't got there yet.
SPEAKER_01:No.
SPEAKER_00:But that'd be nice. So I just quite enjoyed that to be honest.
SPEAKER_01:Let's think.
SPEAKER_00:How do we get through this, girl? I gotta get through this. Um well we're we go back to yesterday with the calendar. A lot of that shit can be, you know, helped with the calendar, can't it? The this novel idea of putting dates onto a calendar.
SPEAKER_01:Well, I mean, I don't do it, so it is novel.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:Um you know when them texts, messages come through from school, announcements, or if they're old school and they send paper home. We need to be screenshot and all that.
SPEAKER_00:Yes, and taking a photo.
SPEAKER_01:And baby putting in a folder.
SPEAKER_00:Put it in its own little folder in your phone, like that's being a gods thing.
SPEAKER_01:Yes, today you can make a little folder in your gallery, pin these bloody things, yeah. And write them into your calendar.
SPEAKER_00:Something for me. Um, I mean it's personal, it's gonna be different for everyone, but the school mum WhatsApp has had a lot of shade on the memes of the internet, and they're always funny, these like little reels about like all the different mum characters that come in on the WhatsApp, or WhatsApp chat has laughed about it and being like, oh, that's me, that's me, you know. But my um eldest anyway, yeah. Our WhatsApp group is like Lifesaver. Saviour.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, because there's one mum. There's always one mum in there, isn't there?
SPEAKER_00:There's one, right? Her child has left our class now, gone to specialist provision. She's remained in the chat, and we all love her, she's just great. And partly because she, you know, upholds this entire system of school needs, like school asking us for things. She's still doing it. She the other day, she's still got a child in the school as well. Oh, okay. Um, but she we were all moaning about it the other day. Oh, we've just had the December newsletter, is this a joke? Blah blah blah. And and she was like, someone said, What we need to do is like put all the dates. No, I think it was her. What we need to do is put all the dates and pin it to the top of the group. She did it. Oh and one mum, friends of mine, said, Actually, can you put my daughter's birthday party in there too? Because it's after school on the Friday on this date. And I was hoping everyone could just do a little walk along the street after school to the church hall where it is. Oh. Um, so she's put that on it too, like, you know, just to help us organise even that aspect of it. It's like an after school that day, we all go to her birthday party straight after.
SPEAKER_01:Well, yeah, that's what I was gonna say. There's always one mum in it who's on the ball. She's fucking great.
SPEAKER_00:Everyone else. A Bailey's ice cream recipe. Oh, yeah. Everyone was just laughing, like, girl, we're not like you.
SPEAKER_01:Good lord.
SPEAKER_00:We're not gonna manage.
SPEAKER_01:I mean, I've been lucky and not none of my WhatsApp mum's groups have been very chassis and they've tended to just be sticking to the facts.
SPEAKER_00:I enjoy the chat with mine.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, I don't because they're not your people. No. Okay. But um the thing with like our WhatsApp group as well, there was like a teacher in it. This was any resume. Oh my god, absolutely gag out. Sorry, there wasn't a teacher in it. That's me misspeaking. There was a a mum in it. She seemed like a teacher to me. Okay, you know, because she was like, in November, she'd be like, So, planning for teacher's gift.
SPEAKER_00:How same.
SPEAKER_01:Everyone donate, I'll go and get it all. This, that. I experienced that in my youngest one's group. Yeah. Um and I was like, made up. Just send her a five as she sorts it out.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:But um in the the secondary, there's doesn't seem to be a teacher's gift thing happening.
SPEAKER_00:Oh right. Well, we we have one in each of my groups that that says it's time to start, you know, planning, and I and I'm happy with that. But again, it's this thing that you talk about with school and like how expenses do come in, even though our school system is free. Um like once you've got two kids as well, it's like 20 quid right at Christmas time. Like, then that's on top of like if you're trying to do well, I just give presents to so many people as well.
SPEAKER_01:It's like getting to that stage where it feels mad, like and we will talk about gifts and finances and all that, won't we? But definitely. The school definitely puts the pressure on because there will be you've got to pay for them to go in on their own clothes, or the Christmas jumper you've gotta pay. There'll be like the Christmas party they want money, the Christmas pantomime they want money.
SPEAKER_00:I'm sure I podded about it actually. Last year, like me, me eldest, I had a Christmas jumper ready, but she had a sensory meltdown over it on the day before or something. I made her try it on, thankfully. Well, I get it. And then she was just like, I want a blue, you know, or something. And she and like I happened to find in the charity shop on the way home from the school on that morning, the morning before the Christmas jumper day. Yeah, a massive, like you know, like a men's L or something for this eight-year-old child. Blue, their favourite colour, Christmas jumper with Santa on or something. It was like save Christmas, but that's how much it kind of matters, and that's just one of the million things to do with school.
SPEAKER_01:And this is the thing with the Christmas jumper, I think it's just another one of these added capitalist bloody Well, I only buy them secondhand, but the thing with my son is yours wanted a very specific jumper each year, so one year it's selled uh.
SPEAKER_00:Oh my god.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, one year it was Minecraft, it was Pokemon. So, like, when you're disorganised like me. That's so much extra to like you can't just grab one of them second hand at last minute, even if I don't want us a bite of inters, like by the time I've thought about it, it's too late.
SPEAKER_00:So that's the sort of thing that takes research.
SPEAKER_01:I've always ended up having to buy them new when it's been stressful when they're gonna arrive on time.
SPEAKER_00:For sure.
SPEAKER_01:And I would advise not to buy Christmas jumpers new because obviously it's so they don't get another word, do they really? They never get another word. Like when are they gonna go around wearing their Christmas jumper? But um also if you haven't had the time to get to the charity shop, not everyone does, they don't have good hours for people who are in work or get to on vintage in time or eBay or whatever, don't give yourself too much of a hard time. Yeah, for sure. Bloody Just read only so whatever if you want to use your conscience for like you know, the eco thing of Christmas jumpers.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah. With my kids being younger, I'm still very much in school play, so need a costume that you wouldn't tend to have at home. And the school always says, don't buy new, just you know, put something together. But it's like mate, I don't I I I don't have an I don't have the the things that look like an angel costume.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, I'm more at school with a fucking craft department and my mum and my aunt.
SPEAKER_00:I don't have like both last year. Or the time to make these costumes, but last year was an absolute win though, and I loved it. Um my youngest had to be a donkey. So it was like, please put together a donkey costume, don't worry, don't buy anything. Um, and there was kids there in like the donkey from Shrek a costume like that or whatever. So I had this, I was always like, oh my god, I had this grey Fer Gillet that my mum had given me my youngest, and it was massive. Um, I found grey got grey school leggings, and she happened to have a grey t-shirt, so I put them together, and then I had um Easter Bunny ears headband. Yeah, got that and got a grey felt and sewed that across the ears. Yeah. Was fucking great. I was so pleased with myself. She didn't have no tail or anything. Um and but the year that my eldest was an angel, I just had to Amazon it. Like there was no like I I didn't have a white, she doesn't wear dresses, she doesn't I thought I was gonna have to just do like a men's XL white t-shirt.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:And that was my plan. But then she seen this angel costume as I was looking round, um, and that was okay. Yeah, she made it work for herself by she she drew all over it with felt tips, yeah. And I was like, great. Um, but she really enjoyed that yeah. But that is another stress factor if you've got kids in school.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. Um so I guess one way of of dealing with it is is to when you find out about it, act on it then. But also if you didn't, chill, you've got too much to worry about.
SPEAKER_00:Just do you remember to outsource, like we've talked about in other episodes, like um in the mum's WhatsApp, you know, again, a good thing about our group is people will be like, has anyone got this?
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:Um so you know, say your child is like mine and you know you can't buy an Amazon angel costume, yeah, you're gonna have to have a men's double XL white t-shirt. You can always throw it out there to check to save you the trip if they can bring it to school pickup. It's some raggedy their fella's t-shirt they don't want or whatever.
SPEAKER_01:And I think the thing too, members, people like helping people, you know, and you feel ashamed asking for things, but some people like the one who's got it all together will be like, Oh yes, I can help, you know what I mean? Like, don't feel ashamed to ask for help.
SPEAKER_00:Totally. Um, and defo again with like just shedding the shame, just ignore some of it. That's what I do anyway. Things like um bring in a bottle, like you have to drop it at reception, so it's not like my child is gonna feel like left out by not taking it in. So I just think, nah, you're alright. I've got enough on. Something I do give myself a a thing over, like extra, way extra str struggly tasks around that time, is I always gift all of the office staff and secretaries and that because well, they've been such a big part of my school mum experience because my daughter did all the school refusal. Yeah. I spent so much time negotiating with that office team because they're the the greeting point at the school. Um I speak to them on the phone regularly, you know, they know who I am from my voice. Um, they're absolutely wonderful women. And like I always want to make a point to like show me gratitude through a gift to them. So I always buy them something quite nice, like a plant or a candle or this or that. And first I was only gifting to the two that I always deal with. Then I realised there was a third office staff that I just don't deal with as often because she comes in a bit later. So now there's her two. But yeah, I guess it's like the same as pick your bottles. So like that really matters to me. They're like wonderful people. I've never. I don't care about adding a bottle to the Tombola. I really couldn't care less, and it's not going to affect my child because she won't, you know, feel different. Like it's the parent has to hand it in. So pick your battles.
SPEAKER_01:If you're struggling financially, I would say appoach the school as well. Let them.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, definitely. Oh, here's another thing I did one year. One year I was like stressing about money around Christmas. And for the Christmas gift collection, like I kind of thought to myself, shall I jib it? Or you know, and I thought, no, come on, I mean it's only a tenaire. But then, oh, maybe that was the one year, the first year, maybe that was a year they were saying 15 because there was an extra staff or something. So I basically gave less than what they had suggested.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:And I thought, I'm fine with that. Yeah. I literally texted the person doing the whip round and was like, I've only given seven actually, or whatever it was. Yeah. And it seems mad, like it's like a few quid. Yeah. But I think for me, it was a bit of a PDA thing of like, I'll give what feels comfortable in my budget. And like, yes, my child's name will be included. Like, I again I have thoughts on that. I think the present should come from the whole class no matter who donates.
SPEAKER_01:Definitely. Oh, yeah.
SPEAKER_00:Um we've experienced a lot of bullshit around that, haven't we? Through other people's.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, just like through what we've heard from other people, not particularly ourselves. Like um, and the other thing I was thinking about, you know, when the Christmas cards consider getting a stamp.
SPEAKER_00:Oh my god. Never heard that.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:Oh, I feel strange about that.
SPEAKER_01:You can get even get a stamp of your signature, you know.
SPEAKER_00:Jesus, I mean, it seems so impersonal, but at the same time, there's no difference. You're getting a card from that person.
SPEAKER_01:No, but you know when it's for your kids and you've got to write this.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, if they're not gonna put a message.
SPEAKER_01:And they're like, I don't want to write it and all this. Just get a stamp that says kids' name.
SPEAKER_00:Get it done. I absolutely wouldn't do that, but it's a great idea. It's just it gives me the ick. I don't know why, but it's a great idea. But I don't do the kids' Christmas cards.
SPEAKER_01:Well, there you go, then better than no Christmas cards.
SPEAKER_00:Depends what you think.
SPEAKER_01:Well, I suppose, yeah, if for the environment, Christmas cards are out and all that. But when my son was at school, every kid in the class gave every kid a card, they put them all in the little Christmas post box, and then after last day of school, they all got dished out. Oh my god, that's incredibly cute. And they come home with 30 cards.
SPEAKER_00:That's pressure to go straight in the recycling.
SPEAKER_01:I'd I either have to write them all myself or have a big battle to try and get him to write them.
SPEAKER_00:Oh my god, yeah, that's so much pressure.
SPEAKER_01:But it was lovely for the kids.
SPEAKER_00:Right.
SPEAKER_01:So I was up for it, but I'd say consider a stamp if you're gonna do Christmas cards. Do you have to do them now in senior school? He does now a secret sanctuar with his class, which was essentially he told me last minute we had to rush to town and buy gifts because the person they they told each other what they wanted for the secret centre as well. So this kid had asked for things from a specific shop.
SPEAKER_00:Love the idea of a class secret centre. God, there's a friggin' window cleaner outside with ladders again. Anyway, my final thought um of what you could do to help yourself is if you're not chipping in and you need to like give a Christmas gift to the teacher or any number of staff members, how about you get one of those little um kits that's like they're about three three quid that's like a paint painter Christmas decoration kit, you know. There's usually like four in them.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:So I think a gorgeous little personal present, and your kid can feel that they've really, you know, created something. You can do one little craft session with your kids or kids make these things. There's a lovely presentation.
SPEAKER_01:You've got to teach them because that's always the thing for like cheap present is do this and that, and you're like, I haven't got fucking time, mate.
SPEAKER_00:I know, but I think they're a really time poor friendly one. You know, it the the decoration exists, it's even got the sort of fucking ribbon on it.
SPEAKER_01:Because you wet your kids anywhere. Um and the paint comes ready portioned, and there's a paintbrush in the kit, so it's pretty like I mean the thing to remember is it's basically for your kid because the teacher will bin that.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, so your kid feels all chuffed that they've given them. It's not the same as you're making a fucking beautiful like cookie mix in a jar thing that's all like measuring out flour and this and that. I'm saying these kits are simple as. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So anyway, we'll see you tomorrow. It's a roll up.
