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EP 64: Four-Eyed Clyde and a Differently-Abled Poopsicle

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Good Morning!!!

This week we explored the deeper meaning of the holidays with 8 Crazy Nights and Fred Claus.

Oh what fun it is to hockey stop a sleigh and discover that we're really not a total piece of shit.

Enjoy! and Happy Holidays from Flick'n'Beans!!!

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Wendy:

Foreign. Good morning.

Bridget:

We have a special treat this morning. If you listened last week to our episode about the room, you know that Wendy gave me civet coffee. But long story short, the civet eats the coffee beans, then poops them out, then they make coffee from the coffee poop.

Wendy:

So, yeah, I. I think they wash it off.

Bridget:

I hope so, because I am about to take my first drink of Civic Coffee and I'm scared.

Wendy:

It tastes like coffee, but it's not special.

Bridget:

I'm a little underwhelmed.

Wendy:

Yeah, it's not super strong. Although that might. You know, maybe we don't have the water to coffee ratio. That kind of changes things. Maybe.

Bridget:

But no, we used a Grams scale.

Wendy:

Sure, but to what water do you know? We look at the water.

Bridget:

I don't know, but it seemed very cloudy. Thick.

Wendy:

Yeah.

Bridget:

Coming out murky.

Wendy:

Yeah. I don't know. It's fine.

Bridget:

Why would someone even come up with this?

Wendy:

I think this is like one of those things, like chicken feet soup.

Bridget:

Oh, bird's nest soup.

Wendy:

Bird, sure.

Bridget:

Yeah.

Wendy:

Yeah.

Bridget:

It's spit.

Wendy:

Yeah. And I think maybe, like, somebody was desperate. The civets were eating all their coffee and cutting into their margins. What if we just rinsed all this off and sold it?

Bridget:

They had a dream and they did.

Wendy:

It just like us.

Bridget:

I know. Let me go back to my new favorite book. It's totally inspiring me to write my memoir.

Wendy:

Yeah.

Bridget:

Technically, I've been writing it a long time, and it's a wild ride. I've even got the title.

Wendy:

Oh, yeah.

Bridget:

You ready?

Wendy:

Yeah, I'm ready.

Bridget:

Why are you like this?

Wendy:

I ask myself several times a day. Yeah, that's great.

Bridget:

Thank you. I think it's perfect. You suggested Christmas movies.

Wendy:

I did Tis the Season.

Bridget:

Basically, they're the same movie. Do you see it? We'll get into it a little later.

Wendy:

Yeah.

Bridget:

Okay. Well, I'll explain. I. No, I really can explain.

Wendy:

All right. So what are the movies?

Bridget:

So we did Eight Crazy Nights, Adam Sandler. It's animated.

Wendy:

Yes. So it's kind of a Hanukkah movie, too.

Bridget:

I was curious about how many Hanukkah movies there might actually be out there. And not being Jewish ourselves, we probably never really noticed. I've been to the synagogue here. My friend helped with the catering for their events. And, I mean, there was stuff going on all the time. It's a really cool space, always. Don't churches kind of make you feel a certain way, even if you're not religious?

Wendy:

Yeah, of course. Like, when you go places in Europe, they always Tell you to go look at the church in the town.

Bridget:

Yeah.

Wendy:

And after a while you're like, can I look at another church? But that's very privileged to say anyway.

Bridget:

For real.

Wendy:

Yeah, but they are beautiful and, like, they have a lot of history because they used to be, like, such a center of social and political.

Bridget:

Yeah, for real.

Wendy:

And they still are. The churches just are now Morton Buildings instead of old strip malls that they couldn't sell to other people. We don't build big, beautiful churches anymore. Well, we do, but they're only those mega churches and they're more like malls.

Bridget:

From the news recently, the rebuilt Notre Dame Cathedral. A thing that just kind of surprised me is that it took 200 years to build. That's a long time.

Wendy:

Especially when the US is like, not even 300 years old.

Bridget:

It's amazing. No wonder we don't build those churches. And all that craftsmanship is lost. There are groups of people. I thought this would have been the. The coolest avenue of study where they use those old techniques to build those kind of structures. Yeah, I'd have a lot of blisters.

Wendy:

Yeah. I'm not very good at manual labor stuff. I'm impatient and clunky.

Bridget:

I am, too. But I also like tedious things, with the exception of jigsaw puzzles.

Wendy:

Oh, really? I love jigsaw puzzles.

Bridget:

I don't know.

Wendy:

I like. I do like Tita's things like cross stitch and crocheting and stuff like that. Tedious.

Bridget:

But knitting for me.

Wendy:

But if I had to take one piece of wood and move it 20ft over and over in a daytime, I would not like that.

Bridget:

True. Me neither. Me neither. That's why I don't do CrossFit. I'm not gonna flip a tire. You kidding me? No, thanks. And even if I did, I'm not gonna run around town talking about it all the time. One reviewer wrote on Reddit, Spaceballs is a Hanukkah movie.

Wendy:

Okay.

Bridget:

And, you know, I changed my mind kind of thing. For good reason. It was Band of Underdogs Defeat an Empire.

Wendy:

I don't know a lot about the Jewish faith. If I had to pick one. Theirs has a lot of nice stuff they pack in. Like, the whole, like, grappling with your faith thing is kind of part of the Jewish religion. It's like.

Bridget:

Yeah.

Wendy:

And I think that's cool because, like, even, you know, everybody has their doubts. There's sweet things about it. It seems like Christianity ruined you.

Bridget:

No, ruin. Ruined Christmas.

Wendy:

Ruined Christmas.

Bridget:

I mean, it. It seems their faith has them contemplate where they came from, the struggles. They have more special occasions than we do. With deeper meaning for us, it's Festivus. Here's what we need for a Festivus party. An aluminum pole meatloaf on a bed of lettuce. For dinner, I do a really good meatless meatloaf. It has a lot of mushrooms and nuts in it.

Wendy:

That sounds better than meatloaf to me. I don't know. Just like, a loaf of meat grosses me out.

Bridget:

It's really good. And it's good cold on a sandwich. Just like regular meatloaf after dinner. Feats of strength. But you also have to wrestle the head of the household.

Wendy:

Wrestle him?

Bridget:

Yeah, wrestle. Yeah. And then a Festivus miracle must occur. It can be a frequent and unimpressive miracle. Like, the meatloaf turned out really good. It's a miracle Grandpa beat you in wrestling. It's a miracle.

Wendy:

Isn't the airing of grievances part of Festivus?

Bridget:

Oh, I skipped it. A gathering to air your grievances.

Wendy:

Like you're going to fight it. Christmas anyway. Like, let's just get it out of the way. You probably fight less if we all just, like, sat down and been like, hey, dude, that wasn't cool.

Bridget:

So this movie is about Davey Stone. Right away, we learn he hates Christmas, and we actually don't really figure out for a while why. He was a great little basketball player. One night, after a particularly good game, his parents didn't make it to the game because they actually were killed in a car accident, which is just. Just horrible for an animated movie with singing.

Wendy:

There's lots of horrible stuff in this. On Brand.

Bridget:

We've heard Adam Sandler sing in a lot of films. Obviously, Wedding Singer. He strums a little ukulele and 50 first dates. And all the songs from his days at Saturday Night Live.

Wendy:

Right?

Bridget:

Which one of them was Sloppy Joe? Slappy Sloppy Joe.

Wendy:

Great one.

Bridget:

His singing. This time he's using, like, his normal voice to sing, and it's actually pretty good. More so than his characters because even, you know, Wedding Singer was failed rock star. So I liked that. His name was Stone, as in his heart. Right. Whitey was also voiced by Adam Sandler. He was a small man with two different sized feet. Lives with his sister. Very hairy, like a white Pomeranian. So Whitey is this referee from the town. And Davey was a basketball player, so they go way back, and he treats Whitey like crap.

Wendy:

The whole town is mean to Whitey. They make fun of him. They play pranks on him because he's.

Bridget:

Different, but he's a sweet soul, and he misses the insult every time. He treats people so nicely. Never gets down on them, never feels insulted. He would be more likely to say, wow, they must be having a bad day today.

Wendy:

Yeah.

Bridget:

And not take anything personally. Whitey has a dream to be given the 35th annual All Star patch. This is your year, Whitey.

Wendy:

Well, he's planning to retire, so. Or they're making him retire. Basically. He's. He doesn't want to, but he's, like, in his 70s, and he's not really.

Bridget:

A very good referee. No, there's basically no chance Whitey's gonna win. So everybody makes fun of Whitey. Whitey goes home to his sister Eleanor. It's a weird dynamic when she's just as tiny and weird and wears a wig, plays the trombone for relaxation.

Wendy:

Yeah, I love that. I wrote that down. I was like, you don't see a lot of casual tram trombone play there.

Bridget:

And they're both soaking their feet in their little personalized tubs. We hinted at this earlier, but one of the mean things that Davey does to Whitey is to spray him with poop water.

Wendy:

Well, he was in Porta Potty, and Davey pushed it down this. Down the hill. And then Davey goes, let me wash you off, but it's freezing outside, so the water just makes him a poopsicle. And I think he calls him a poop sickle.

Bridget:

Yeah. He says, smell you later, poop sickle. And it was sad. I'm like, he's gonna die. Along comes the herd of deer and treat them like a yummy salt lick.

Wendy:

Yeah, they're like, poop sickle.

Bridget:

And they've got poop in their teeth. And they're grinning, they're happy about it, and they're laughing. It's like when you eat an Oreo when you're not mindful that it's an Oreo.

Wendy:

Yeah, that's one reason I don't really care for Oreos. The mouth feel is gross.

Bridget:

You know why that is? This is science. And again, on flicking beans, you learn something. I will tell you. It's because you take baking soda and you bake it. So you're making baked soda, and that causes a chemical reaction with the cocoa which turns it that almost black color Science thoughts on bullies. My thought is they just act that way because they don't think anybod cares about them. Losing your parents might make you feel a certain way, but he's just angry at the world. It's a stage of grief, has no reason to work himself out of it. He's just punching in the air.

Wendy:

Is. Is that one of the reasons they're the same movie? Because that's like, the moral of the story is that bullies are really hurting, so they hurt others.

Bridget:

Well, also, both Davey and Fred Claus befriend a child and realizing that bond makes them feel a certain way, like they're worth something and needed. Both basically move in with old people. Well, Fred's brother is Santa, but you also get their parents in on that action. They both catch the attention of the girl that they like simply by changing a little. You know, them seeing that he can bond with somebody, he can stick up for somebody, that kid that he sees himself in. Okay, I got more. Okay, so in both situations, because we know that Davey had to move in with whitey and his sister. He had no place else to go. He didn't want to, but Whitey was so nice. And soon he's got his own feet in a bucket with his own name on it. They really got on the crafting there. Or Etsy. You know, you can get some speedy shipping. But in spite of himself, he started to enjoy it, and he started to have fun with them and enjoy their company. And I think for him, it was a grandparents feel. So he suddenly felt loved and not triggered to bully.

Wendy:

I really like the music in this. I think it was clever and catchy, But I love the technical foul song.

Bridget:

Yes.

Wendy:

When he first moves in and he's just saying all these terrible things.

Bridget:

Yeah.

Wendy:

Especially the part where he's like, walk around with my morning wood.

Bridget:

Yes.

Wendy:

And then the sister's like, but I wouldn't mind seeing it anyway.

Bridget:

Yes. I walk around with my morning erection. If you want an automatic ej, But I'd like to see it anyway.

Wendy:

Just kidding.

Bridget:

Yeah, sure she would.

Wendy:

Poor Whitey and his sister. Just old virgins. Prob.

Bridget:

For real. We see the same thing with the girl noticing his sort of suddenly being responsible in big daddy too.

Wendy:

Yeah, it's. I think it's a common theme in a lot of Adam Sandler is he starts out as kind of a dumb dumb. A dumb dumb. And then. Yeah. Shows that he has some competency.

Bridget:

Yeah. When the female sees the male performing fatherly duty, therefore seeming mature, it makes her want to get married. If she wants to be a mommy.

Wendy:

Sure. Although somebody that, like, didn't want to be a mom, I have to say, like, it's kind of hot that I married a dad. Like, it is. There is something about, like, that or paternal instinct. That's like very attractive even if you don't want kids yourself. Yeah, because I guess it does show that, like they're responsible or caring.

Bridget:

Even though he really starts to enjoy that dynamic at one point, he turns on them out of anger, pain, personal pain in his heart. And is that about when he goes to the mall? The mall's very cathedral. Like, especially when he kneels and he's in that big tile circle on the floor, arms in the air, basically praying to the mall God. It's very fitting.

Wendy:

Yeah. And that's where Whitey goes to to pray. So they both end up finding peace in the mall.

Bridget:

I wrote down a reformed bully. Still deserves a kick in the nuts. I've seen that story arc before. Like my name is a row. Somebody goes around making amends or, you know, righting the wrongs that they did. And you'd like to think that it's a happy little ending, but you could.

Wendy:

Get a punch in that show. He gets plenty and he's kind of.

Bridget:

Like, yeah, and we've got lots of fart jokes and lots of poop jokes.

Wendy:

Yeah. I love the laughing deer. The running joke is the mayor tells a joke that's not funny and then everybody is like dying laughing, including the deer outside for some reason. And they're like themselves, projectile pooping because they laughing so hard.

Bridget:

And the joke wasn't funny at all. But people are just appeasing him cuz he's the mayor. I loved the operatic type of song that he sings where he finally turns around and is defending Whitey. It reminded me of Gaston and Beauty and the Beast.

Wendy:

Can we also talk about the character that's in the film for no reason, but is one of my favorites, the three boobed lady.

Bridget:

Yeah, what's that about?

Wendy:

She's. Yeah, there's lots of jokes about her having three b**** and then at one point she's like nursing three babies.

Bridget:

Coffee break. Let's talk about our beans.

Wendy:

Hey, bean flickers, have you followed us yet? We are on Instagram and Facebook at flicking beans pod. Make sure you like and subscribe and leave us a review.

Bridget:

Oh my God. And when she's laughing, they're all like juggling independently.

Wendy:

Is three b**** better than two? I don't think it doesn't matter as.

Bridget:

Long as they're centered. That's what I'm gonna say. As long as they're in the right general location.

Wendy:

Somebody just in the writing room was like, hey, what if they didn't have anywhere else to put it? So they put it in this.

Bridget:

She's someone that is different in their community, but she's accepted. She's just the three boobed lady.

Wendy:

Right. Nobody. Yeah. She's even part of the bullying sometimes.

Bridget:

Do you want to talk more about Fred Claus? Yeah. Vince Vaughn. He does always make me laugh.

Wendy:

He's very charming. So we talked a little bit about the basic plot. Vince Vaughn is Fred Claus, Santa Claus's older brother. You know, he has this complex, which so many of us do, where one sibling is the golden child and the others feel like they're left out. When he goes to the sibling support group, it's like Frank Stallone, one of the Baldwins. Stephen. Yeah. And Bill Clinton's brother.

Bridget:

But they don't believe him.

Wendy:

Right. They're like, yeah, right. Santa Claus.

Bridget:

This movie also is a callback to where the man can't commit despite the fact that he's in love.

Wendy:

Yeah. I won't even move in with her.

Bridget:

No. Postpone settling down forever. Just settle down. See what happens. Try it out.

Wendy:

At first, we think it's like a commitment thing because he's just kind of a tool. Maybe part of the reason he doesn't want to commit to her is because I have all this family baggage I haven't even told her about. He's kind of excommunicated from his family. You know, at some point she's going to find that out, and she does, and she believes it almost right away. That's kind of wild. She's just like, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Bridget:

I could. I could use a vacay. Again, a similarity. Fred befriends Willie, who's an elf. That's the unlikely friendship as between Davey and Whitey.

Wendy:

Okay, I thought you were talking about the Sam, the little kid that was an orphan.

Bridget:

Well, him too, because he. His heart starts to melt for this kid. I mean, he even gives him a puppy. He loves him. But at the end, in his last visit to him before he gets adopted, he doesn't even want to look at the kid. It's one of those I don't want to say goodbye moments.

Wendy:

I thought that the movie was going in the direction that Fred was going to adopt Sam because they show them, like, all going out to dinner and everything. You're like, oh, they're like a family now. But no, he gets adopted by someone else.

Bridget:

Yeah.

Wendy:

Still a happy ending, but it plants that seed.

Bridget:

Oh, I could be a dad. I don't hate this. Maybe not at that particular moment in his life, but I think he could see it Fred also doesn't really have a real job. He gambles and he cons. Here we go. Another con artist. So he's dressed up as Santa and he basically is stealing the red cattle. But then he's beat up by a gang of Santa's. Very Anchorman. Kind of.

Wendy:

Yeah.

Bridget:

And their weapon of choice was caution. Wet floor signs. The f***?

Wendy:

Yeah. When you have a metal bell in your hand, wouldn't that hurt more?

Bridget:

Oh, you're right.

Wendy:

Maybe they don't want to hurt their bells. But.

Bridget:

That friendship that develops between Fred and Willie, he's resisting that at first because he's a cool guy. And here's this little tiny willy, but the way he handles that sleigh, he's like realizing this guy is badass. He's like a hockey stop. Are you kidding me? Did you forget you have a passenger? They land in. There are little people. Secret Service.

Wendy:

Yeah.

Bridget:

Like dress like ninjas practically. And can we talk about Kevin Spacey?

Wendy:

A line that I think sums it up pretty well where Fred goes to Kevin Spacey's character. I don't know what you're into, but there's something creepy about you.

Bridget:

Foreshadowing.

Wendy:

Right?

Bridget:

Also at the end when Kevin Spacey is turned, quote, unquote good, he's working at the factory with the elves. It was like, how many of those is he molesting on the daily or grooming? His character had a lot of good points, though, on efficiency. And when he actually described the operation of Santa. Christmas, Santa's workshop, it really is a money losing game.

Wendy:

I was a little bit confused about where Kevin's face he was coming from. Like, who has the authority to shut down Christmas?

Bridget:

Does he ever say he had the authority to talk about Easter too? He's with a holiday efficiency consultant for the world's holidays, I guess.

Wendy:

But is there like a holiday board that they all answer to or something?

Bridget:

Huh?

Wendy:

Is that what it is?

Bridget:

I'm. I'm gonna say they gotta listen to the higher ups.

Wendy:

You know, you would think Santa is like, at the top, but he wasn't even involved.

Bridget:

No, he was one of the peons. Worse than the Easter Bunny. Yeah. He was like, Easter. What is that anyway? Bunnies, chicks, eggs. Go figure. And it's just like Christmas lost all meaning. I mean, people still go to church, but consumerism, marketing, branding, and let's even go back to Judaism, Christianity, Santa Claus, Jebus, or a loved one, let's say. The idea that someone or entity is watching us, all of those have that theme. I don't like it. The settings in the North Pole were pretty cool, especially their giant dome. So you can call up anybody in the world and live stream them. So he looked in on his girlfriend. He's got nobody else except that kid.

Wendy:

True. I don't like the relationship and how she forgives him after all the s*** that he pulled. The end. He shows up and he tells her that he's moving in. He doesn't ask her.

Bridget:

Right.

Wendy:

Even though they're kind of like broken up at this point. He's just like, oh, yeah, my stuff is on its way over. I. I canceled my lease. Like, we're living together. And she's like, oh, happy about that?

Bridget:

Yeah.

Wendy:

I'll be so p*****.

Bridget:

Well, shows up, breaks in, and is standing over her bed in a filthy Santa suit. You might as well be dressed like a clown.

Wendy:

Yeah.

Bridget:

I mean, I know that she wanted him to, but by that time she probably would have changed her mind.

Wendy:

Yeah. She was very upset with all the things he said he was gonna do and didn't do. The movies, like a big romantic gesture. So I get that.

Bridget:

Yeah.

Wendy:

But in real life, those things, you're just like, I would hate that.

Bridget:

Yeah.

Wendy:

I would not be okay with that.

Bridget:

If you have that happen once, that's their way. It'll keep happening.

Wendy:

It'll be like Homer and Marge Simpson. For the rest of your life, he'll be doing the same things that you're mad at him for over and over and over again.

Bridget:

What kind of episode would that be if Homer and Marge get a divorce?

Wendy:

There's lots of times where you think they might. But she eventually forgives him when she.

Bridget:

Was taking bowling lessons or when he was managing the country singer Lurleen. When somebody gives you extra attention. Yeah. It can make the grass seem greener. I noticed. And this is in so many of the best movies, always got to be a giant lever that basically makes the world blow up.

Wendy:

Yeah. Isn't it weird to think that, like, that really exists? Kind of. There's just a button out there somewhere that the. Our president or the leader of some other country could push and just blow up the world?

Bridget:

Yeah. I'd like to think it's at least two buttons. Like when you would push, record and play on a tape recorder.

Wendy:

I don't know if it was one of the movies that we watched, but there was. It had to have two keys. Such Jurassic park, maybe. They were like two keys that had to be turned at the same time.

Bridget:

Okay.

Wendy:

They were on far enough that one person couldn't reach both.

Bridget:

Oh, okay.

Wendy:

To be two people do it.

Bridget:

Oh, okay, that's another. Because the way, the way you, the way you mimed the two keys, all I could think of was what if you only had one arm?

Wendy:

Yeah, you couldn't do it.

Bridget:

You're the leader. I want a one armed person. Kevin Spacey does make his turnaround because he was called Four Eyed Clyde growing up. Nobody likes to be bullied or name called. He wears glasses. All he wanted for Christmas was a Superman cape. So he gets it in a very touching scene, takes off his glasses and that's the moment he feels worthy of Christmas. One of the cutest, sweetest parts is after Christmas, toys are all delivered. All of the elves run to the snow globe. The top like, it's like a rotund. Very cool. And they pack the place. And what they see are the children around the world getting opening their toys and the joy on their face. For children around the world, that's the joy of Christmas. But the real joy was the elves watching. It's not about toys. The sad part is that people don't feel worthy of other people's love. The true meaning of Christmas is showing your friends and family through your actions and your, your words, how much you love them. Did we do it?

Wendy:

I think we did. We flicked some beads. Okay, love you.

Bridget:

Bye bye.

Wendy:

It's kind of sludgy at the bottom.

Bridget:

Party all night long.

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Bridget

Co-host
Head Shot

Wendy

Co-host