EP 91: HOLLYWOOD BOULEVARD - Just Enjoying the Natural Tits of the Day

Good Morning!!!

This week we delve into Hollywood Boulevard, the movie that inspired my 'boyfriend' Greg Sestero (The Disaster Artist/The Room/Best Friends 1 and 2) to pursue a career in the movie industry. Why? We will never understand.

Enjoy!!!!

Love you!!! Bye!!!!!!

Transcript

Bridget: 0:04

Foreign.

Wendy: 0:10

Good morning.

Bridget: 0:10

I'm Bridget.

Wendy: 0:11

And I'm Wendy.

Bridget: 0:12

And this is flicking beans this morning. Back to Seven Brew. And you see that I have my famous Pixie Stick little salivation station.

Wendy: 0:24

And I wanted sugar. The German chocolate. Needed some calories or something. I don't know. I'm dragging.

Bridget: 0:30

We took a little trip in time back to 1976.

Wendy: 0:33

We did.

Bridget: 0:34

To watch the movie that inspired my boyfriend, Greg Cestero.

Wendy: 0:40

Yes, Greg Flea Collar Seresto. Yeah.

Bridget: 0:45

And I'm guessing so, so, so many other actors. Hollywood Boulevard. It really is a spoof parody, a satire of the Hollywood movie industry.

Wendy: 0:55

Yeah, the.

Bridget: 0:56

The casting agent character trope, whatever. I swear, that's exactly who they were going for in Stuck on youn. And almost as if he had aged.

Wendy: 1:10

And it was the same man, same guy.

Bridget: 1:13

It was exactly the same. And you know, the different telephones and the. You know, I've got a line on this. I don't have an Amazon, but I have a midget.

Wendy: 1:23

A midget with a worm instead of an Amazon with a snake.

Bridget: 1:26

Exactly.

Wendy: 1:27

Yeah. I liked the trope with the phones. And at one point, he answers the.

Bridget: 1:31

Phone in the fridge, wheeling and dealing. This was cheaply done.

Wendy: 1:38

I'm shocked.

Bridget: 1:39

$60,000. And it was filmed in just 10 days.

Wendy: 1:43

Oh, wow. That I am surprised by. Yeah, it definitely seems low budget, so that doesn't surprise me. But the fact that they filmed it so fast does. As they're doing films in this one.

Bridget: 1:54

A week, I want to say all those old Hollywood studios, and you think way back in, like, the Judy Garland days, how they were just doing movie after movie after movie after movie and they all sucked.

Wendy: 2:06

Yeah.

Bridget: 2:08

People needed entertainment then.

Wendy: 2:10

That was their version of pushing out a social media post every day. It's like something will stick.

Bridget: 2:15

Right? Exactly. It gave me a real To Sir With Love feel. I don't know if you've ever seen that one. It's a classic Sidney Poitier.

Wendy: 2:27

Okay.

Bridget: 2:28

But it's during the same time period and they use that same. That musical montage device that we all love, but in that really kind of mellow way.

Wendy: 2:39

Yeah. Okay.

Bridget: 2:40

You know, it's like. And not a lot happens, but it's more like the montages. I am in a new city. Look at the sights, look at me walking across the street. Not a whole lot happens.

Wendy: 2:54

Yeah.

Bridget: 2:55

But it definitely does remind me of that because. And in certain. When we did the 80s movies, you always had that 80s makeover montage. And this is sort of. I see this a lot. It isn't really pushing the narrative. It's just a nice song.

Wendy: 3:14

Yeah. Yeah.

Bridget: 3:16

Anyway.

Wendy: 3:18

To break up the monotony.

Bridget: 3:19

Yeah, I kind of went off on that.

Wendy: 3:22

But this movie was a little unstructured and hard to follow. There wasn't, like, one main narrative going through the whole film. So anything that happened didn't really surprise me because I didn't know what was going. Were they making actual adult films or was it just, like, lots of nudity? I couldn't quite tell.

Bridget: 3:42

I don't think they were pornographic films.

Wendy: 3:45

Okay.

Bridget: 3:46

I think that they were just enjoying the natural t*** of the day.

Wendy: 3:50

Yeah.

Bridget: 3:52

That's actually kind of fun because nowadays everyone's t*** in Hollywood look the same.

Wendy: 3:58

Yeah.

Bridget: 3:59

There's one scene where the girls are just laying there, like, sunning themselves between the set breaks, topless. And I'm just like, wow. Nipples, nipples, nipples. I don't know. I guess I can see why guys enjoy b**** because they're all very, very different and very fun in their own way.

Wendy: 4:21

Yeah. Yeah. Not too well. Maybe two are the same, but not even the two on your body are the same. Really.

Bridget: 4:28

Oh, my God. The eyes are the nipples of the face. I think that you're supposed to take away from that. Obviously, if you want to be a hob Hollywood star and actress, you're going to have to be naked, sleep with the producer. Always. Yeah. Casting couch. And you just shouldn't even think anything of it. What about when they're filming that scene where she's being, like, raped by all the men, basically just ripping at her clothes for the shot. But when he says cut, they don't.

Wendy: 5:05

They're like wild animals. I can't stop pawing at her.

Bridget: 5:09

That's kind of a metaphor, I'm sure.

Wendy: 5:12

Yeah. And they come back to it when that scene comes on in the drive in when she's going to her premiere, and then the guy that runs the machine, then he, like, starts raping her just because he sees her that happening on the screen. And I'm like, what is going on? And then the other guy comes in and joins in.

Bridget: 5:28

Yeah.

Wendy: 5:29

This is a lot. It didn't make sense and it was way too lightly taken.

Bridget: 5:33

It's that whole thing. You put your art out there and now you belong to them. I'm glad you mentioned that. They were at the quote premiere.

Wendy: 5:43

Yeah.

Bridget: 5:44

Because it was the three of them in a convertible. The agent had press written in marker on a piece of construction paper taped to the windshield. And so, first of all, three people in a convertible in the front seat is no, cars aren't even made that way.

Wendy: 6:05

No. And they not only did they ride that way, they sat through multiple movies watching in that tiny little seat.

Bridget: 6:12

Well, and how sad it is that the movie premiere is the late, late, late feature at the drive in. I love drive ins, though, by the way.

Wendy: 6:24

I do too. And I haven't been to them as much as I'd like.

Bridget: 6:27

One of my favorite parts was when they had the band singing the song as the device instead of just like fading or cutting away to explain that they're having sex. Oh, he just for the radio knob. And then all of a sudden it's like a music video.

Wendy: 6:47

Yeah.

Bridget: 6:47

And the words are like, everybody's trucking. Everybody's doing it now.

Wendy: 6:53

Yeah.

Bridget: 6:56

Trucking. They also had auditions for Topless Ladies, but time is money. No time to have them strip. Let's just hose them off. Well, there you go. More nipples. When she gets that call and the actress ends up getting murder and there's like a makeup table with the light on out in the middle of the yard. Ever is waiting to kill her, knows that she's definitely going to look at herself in the mirror.

Wendy: 7:25

Right. Moth to a flame.

Bridget: 7:29

Yeah.

Wendy: 7:31

Bug zapper.

Bridget: 7:32

Yes. Jesus. Wow. Smells like I rubbed some onions under there.

Wendy: 7:41

Please keep that in.

Bridget: 7:43

Oh, my God. You're the only one who could see me smelling my pit. Right? Wow. It's all the ingredients of a really good salad dressing.

Wendy: 7:54

Yep. Just stick the vegetable under there and then.

Bridget: 8:01

Oh, my God, that's nasty. When they're filming that one movie scene or whatever where they got all the machine guns and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, and all of a sudden, like, rubber body parts start dropping on the ground.

Wendy: 8:17

Yeah. Some of it's like a stiff mannequin and then there's like a few hands that are floppy.

Bridget: 8:22

And there was a literal torso, like, exactly. Severed at the waist, that drops and it's clearly like rubber.

Wendy: 8:32

Yeah.

Bridget: 8:34

Like. No, that's. No, it's a classic. Man. I'm glad I saw it.

Wendy: 8:40

I am interested to see now if I pick up more nods to it and other stuff. Some of the dialogue is pretty great. There's a point where the girls go, now get up or I'll cut it off.

Bridget: 8:53

Yeah, well, but the director says. Okay, now this is the line that sums up the entire concept of the movie in this line. That was it.

Wendy: 9:04

Yeah.

Bridget: 9:05

Okay. Okay.

Wendy: 9:07

When they go to the movies, the movie that's on before her comes on is like these two monsters doing it.

Bridget: 9:14

It.

Wendy: 9:14

And it's so weird and gross and why? It was weird, odd, papier mache puppets, kind of. And one of them sort of looked like a v***** and the other one was just like an orb and they were connecting it all these weird spots on their bodies. I don't know. It's gross. And I just don't know where it came from. I guess I would like to know.

Bridget: 9:41

Jeez. This is probably that girl from Stop Motion.

Wendy: 9:45

Yeah. No, it was her mom.

Bridget: 9:47

Yeah.

Wendy: 9:48

This was in 76.

Bridget: 9:53

Yeah. A lot of murder, a lot of b****, a lot of over the top moments.

Wendy: 9:59

Yes. The running theme is that they keep losing actresses and actors, stunt women. And in the beginning, when they have them jump out of the plane and the parachute doesn't come out, the body makes like a Looney Tunes hole.

Bridget: 10:11

Yeah, that is perfect. Oh, exactly what you call it.

Wendy: 10:20

Yeah.

Bridget: 10:21

Oh, yes. And meanwhile, the director's talking about we need to add in some more sex in the crucifixion scene.

Wendy: 10:29

Yeah, yeah. They don't give a that these actresses are dying at all. They just leave one of them out in the field.

Bridget: 10:36

Yeah. Well, pack it up. Because they know. That's the whole point is they're. There's another one where that one came from.

Wendy: 10:44

Yeah.

Bridget: 10:44

And they're easy enough to manipulate because they're hungry.

Wendy: 10:47

Yeah, exactly.

Bridget: 10:48

Yeah.

Wendy: 10:49

So what do you think about this makes you want to be an actor? Because it's really terrible.

Bridget: 10:54

Absolutely nothing.

Wendy: 10:56

It's like, I don't know if I want to go into Hollywood. This is gross. And especially as a woman. Maybe Greg had some fantasy of being the director.

Bridget: 11:05

Maybe they were more just seeing a lot of b****.

Wendy: 11:08

Yeah.

Bridget: 11:11

So her actual murder got filmed by accident.

Wendy: 11:14

Yes.

Bridget: 11:15

And they did do like a Hollywood movie about it, supposedly.

Wendy: 11:21

Yeah.

Bridget: 11:21

They had changed her name from Candy Hope to Candy Wednesday and the movie was called Candy Wednesday, the Hollywood Sign Girl, because she was killed by the sign. Then the final scene, she's dead. This movie comes out. The next thing you see is she is at a cocktail party, basically being praised for this movie. So I think that's a nod to this is her afterlife.

Wendy: 11:49

Yeah, that probably is what. It's what it is because it's over the top too. You know, it wouldn't. She wouldn't suddenly be a star from them because we saw the premiere.

Bridget: 12:00

Well, you're more famous in death than you are in life, maybe. Did we do it?

Wendy: 12:05

I think we did it. We flick some beans. Okay. Love you. Bye.

Bridget: 12:10

Bye. Party all night long.