FLICK'N'BEANS
Longtime friends and bandmates Bridget and Wendy review one movie each week over fancy coffees every Sunday morning. Includes lots of swearing, laughing, and dog panting. Sometimes other friends join in.
You'll like this if you like "How Did This Get Made?" or "Unspooled."
FLICK'N'BEANS
EP 132: BIRDBOX - Those Aren't Speed Bumps, They're Dead Bodies
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Good Morning!!!
This week we need our fancy sleep masks (blindfolds are so 2018) to protect us from gazing at the "entity" and un-aliving ourselves. We learn that there are only two types of people in the world: assholes and the dead, and why a machete is useful in a rowboat.
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Foreign. Good morning.
>> Bridget:I'm Bridget.
>> Wendy:And I'm Wendy and this is Flickin. Beans. Happy Easter.
>> Bridget:Happy Easter to you too.
>> Wendy:Thank you.
>> Bridget:I've had kind of already a very stressful morning.
>> Wendy:Oh, no.
>> Bridget:So my friend said, hey, when you go to Ankeny, can you pick up this waffle iron that he got on Marketplace? So I plugged it into my Maps app and I was like, f***, it's all the way on the northeast side of Ankeny.
>> Wendy:Yeah. The opposite of where we're at. Yeah.
>> Bridget:And I had to do so many U turns because the house number was dumb.
>> Wendy:Yeah.
>> Bridget:And the sun was in my eyes.
>> Wendy:Were you in one of those subdivisions where all the houses look the same too? No, actually there's a lot of those in an.
>> Bridget:But it was the one house on the block that didn't have a number, of course. And I went right past it and then I had to turn around. The other thing was, you know, I can never remember your street address.
>> Wendy:Yeah.
>> Bridget:So I just plugged in first street and it went west First Street. So the entire way back I couldn't shut it off. And so it kept just telling me to go the wrong way. And I was like, I don't know why I did that because I can find my way to Wendy's house. And I just thought, whatever. I wanted to see how long it took.
>> Wendy:Yeah.
>> Bridget:So now I have no idea. It's gonna keep at me the whole way home. What if it was a real person and you just kept taking the wrong turn?
>> Wendy:Have you seen the south park episodes where Alexa's a real person?
>> Bridget:Oh, God, no.
>> Wendy:Yeah, well, she's like a hologram, but she looks like a real person. And at first you think it's his wife cuz she's just nagging him all the time, but then it's his Alexa.
>> Bridget:Yes.
>> Wendy:And she gets really p***** and then she. And then she calms down and goes, there's a sale on the kind of chips that you like. Two for one or whatever. Would you like me to add it to the list? And that's the only way you can get her to calm down.
>> Bridget:Oh my God.
>> Wendy:But when you're doing directions in the car, she also like yells. Yells at you instead of.
>> Bridget:Oh my God. Yeah, that's perfect. Remember the old GPS ones? And they would just be like. Recalculating. Yeah, recalculating.
>> Wendy:Yeah.
>> Bridget:So you look very pretty today for Easter.
>> Wendy:Yeah, we're gonna go to my parents and just have a meal. We're not churchgoers or anything.
>> Bridget:Oh, My God.
>> Wendy:I like to dress up sometimes.
>> Bridget:I have an Easter story, and it's horrifying. Okay, okay. When I was like, I don't know, like five. Okay. It's Easter morning, I get out of bed, and I start to take off my nightgown and my underpants. Okay. And I hear, come now. Come downstairs now. So I throw my nightgown back on. Didn't put my underwear back on. There's a photo of me sitting cross legged with.
>> Wendy:With your basket.
>> Bridget:With my. Yeah, with my little booter hanging out. And that was shown to everyone. My pee pee.
>> Wendy:You would get arrested for that nowadays.
>> Bridget:No. Oh, my God.
>> Wendy:If you started showing it to people, that. It becomes a crime.
>> Bridget:Oh, wow.
>> Wendy:Yeah.
>> Bridget:Well, that was the 70s, so what are you gonna do?
>> Wendy:It's fine.
>> Bridget:They did a lot of things that would be considered crimes now.
>> Wendy:Yeah. Just think about how different drunk driving was then.
>> Bridget:Oh, my God.
>> Wendy:If you were really messing up, they'd follow you home.
>> Bridget:Oh.
>> Wendy:But that's about it.
>> Bridget:I don't even think. Oh, I see.
>> Wendy:I don't even think drunk driving became a crime until the 80s.
>> Bridget:Well, they didn't have breathalyzers.
>> Wendy:Yeah, that's true. But they still did have the you make you walk a line. I'm sure.
>> Bridget:But that's true. Have you had to do it? No, I have. I have. And I spent the night in jail. Whoopsie. Long time ago. We may have a new listener. Okay, shout out to Bella.
>> Wendy:Hi, Bella.
>> Bridget:Yeah, she works at the restaurant. She kills it. It. She has the hardest job. Handles all the reservations. Hostess. Has to talk to people on the phone. But no, she's awesome.
>> Wendy:I hate answering the phone in restaurants. Because you can't hear? No, because restaurants are loud. And then you're, like, trying to get their order and you're like, I don't know if I got that right. Right, right.
>> Bridget:Yeah.
>> Wendy:Eat it. So, yeah, shout out. Bella, you got a tough job.
>> Bridget:Definitely. Okay, on with it. Our movie this week was Bird Box
>> Wendy:2018, and it's currently streaming on Netflix.
>> Bridget:I love this MO.
>> Wendy:This is the second time I've seen it, and I remember the first time thinking I didn't like it that much. So I don't know if I was just in a weird place or not paying close enough attention, but this time I really enjoyed it.
>> Bridget:This would be my second time, too.
>> Wendy:I thought it was newer than this, too. Yeah, 2018 is older than I thought it was. It's a dystopian film. What if the world comes to an end? Would we do? And there's this crazy creature coming after them, but Sandra Bullock is the lead. And of course, she's a painter.
>> Bridget:Of course. But you know what I was thinking? And she's a really good painter. I was thinking, you know, we've talked about how common painters and writers are in architects, in movies. Everybody always has a cool job. But I was thinking, there's always a failed writer. There's never a failed painter or a s***** painter.
>> Wendy:Yeah, right. Like failed. Maybe, like, they're not professionally successful, but you look at their work and they're good. There's not anybody that, like. You're like, yeah, you should try. I caught a little, I think, probably intentional thing about the art that she.
>> Bridget:Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
>> Wendy:She actually moves it to look at the news. She's got one of her paintings in front of it, and she notoriously is, like, disconnected. She doesn't want to know. So she has to actually, like, move her art to look at the news. And I thought that was sort of an interesting choice. Maybe she's using her art to escape or make the news prettier by putting the art in front of it.
>> Bridget:Sure. She sort of was in denial about a lot of things. So many things, considering the fact that she was very pregnant. The technician doing the ultrasound was like, you can't just wish it away. Yeah, you're definitely having a baby.
>> Wendy:This is happening.
>> Bridget:That was crazy. And you can't see the s*** that's coming after people.
>> Wendy:Yeah. So in the beginning, they have no idea what's happening. It just sort of seems like maybe a virus, but that's not the case. People just start killing themselves in public. They see something, they get a weird look in their eye, and they kill themselves Horrible ways, too. Like jumping in front of car, smashing their heads into walls. The lady that tries to save her just sits in a burning car.
>> Bridget:Yes.
>> Wendy:I'm like, of all the ways, right,
>> Bridget:I'm just going to get in this car and then it explodes.
>> Wendy:Yes.
>> Bridget:It's so crazy. And the people that see it and don't kill themselves are trying to get everyone to look. So what is it about people that makes them like a Pied Piper or conduit?
>> Wendy:Yeah. There's one mention in the middle of the film that a lot of them come from the mental institution.
>> Bridget:Right.
>> Wendy:So it could be if you. Your brain's wired a little differently, it doesn't make you kill yourself. It just takes you over and makes you do its work.
>> Bridget:Huh?
>> Wendy:Yeah, I guess so. I thought that maybe was what they Were trying to say is mental illness makes you susceptible to it. But we don't never really find out why. Some people don't die. Either way, you don't want to look at it because you don't want to be dead.
>> Bridget:Somebody said there's only two types of people, a******* and the dead.
>> Wendy:Yeah. That was Mr. John Malkovich.
>> Bridget:Yeah. He is so creepy.
>> Wendy:Yeah. You hate him in this.
>> Bridget:He's sort of full of himself.
>> Wendy:Yeah. And a d***. Sort of saw a lot of alignments with some, like, conservative or libertarian values as well. That mentality of, like, individualism and protecting yourself at all costs over being more inclusive and helpful. And they had kind of have a conversation about that at one point, too, when they're talking about her dad. He believes that you had to be an a****** to survive, kind of. You can survive that way. But doesn't it always catch up to you?
>> Bridget:Yeah.
>> Wendy:When they lock him in the garage and then he has to, like, be the savior. He does redeem himself, I guess, at the end for that. But, yeah.
>> Bridget:Back to the thing. In order to not see it, everyone's wearing blindfolds for everything except for the time that they're together in the house and they've covered up all the windows. And Sandra Bullock and another pregnant woman that is saved have their babies the exact same time.
>> Wendy:Yeah.
>> Bridget:Goodness. Can you imagine?
>> Wendy:I wonder if that would be a thing. Because women's cycles can sync up, so it's not totally out of the realm of possibility that if you were due around the same time, those hormones would set you both off. So. But, yeah, that was very dramatic. They're having babies with no medical intervention and all this other stuff going on in the world.
>> Bridget:Right.
>> Wendy:Which probably feels like what it's like to have a kid right now.
>> Bridget:Right. Oh, I believe you. Why do they always need buckets of water?
>> Wendy:I don't know.
>> Bridget:And usually they say boiling water.
>> Wendy:Yeah. Is that just to, like, sanitize?
>> Bridget:I guess, maybe. But she didn't ask for. She just said, we need buckets and buckets of water. And that's where Sandra's filling the bucket and her water break.
>> Wendy:Yeah.
>> Bridget:Oh, God. Nope. Still denial.
>> Wendy:So the way that the movie is laid out is kind of interesting because it's going back and forth between being a flashback and being in real time when she's trying to escape. So you know already that by the end of this, it's just her and the kids. So it's sort of sad. The whole time, you're like, how's this person gonna Die. Especially when she falls in love with Tom. He doesn't make it. He's not with them.
>> Bridget:He sacrificed himself.
>> Wendy:Yeah.
>> Bridget:The other pregnant woman dies, she does the same thing. And looks. Sandra takes her baby. She still doesn't wanna connect to them. So she name boy and girl.
>> Wendy:Yeah. And it's just like in the beginning that the doctor said, like, as much as you try to pretend that if you don't give them names, you're not gonna fall in love with them. You can't. You're their mom.
>> Bridget:Did she fall in love with them?
>> Wendy:I mean, she was doing everything to keep them alive.
>> Bridget:Right. It was a long teaching process because it was about five years. And they managed to stay alive in a cabin, but still wearing blindfolds.
>> Wendy:Yeah.
>> Bridget:Which, I mean, that's like one of those sensitivity training and you have to freaking make your way to the bathroom or whatever.
>> Wendy:Yeah.
>> Bridget:Have you participated in some of those?
>> Wendy:And I feel like in school we did some things like that where you had to have a disability and see what it was like.
>> Bridget:Yeah.
>> Wendy:Also thought, why are these the blindfolds they're still wearing after five minutes?
>> Bridget:Oh, God. Yeah.
>> Wendy:They're just loosely tied bandanas or like a scarf or something. It's like, couldn't you have found a sleep mask with some elastic? So could it fall off?
>> Bridget:You're so hilarious. Yeah. Oh, God. What if it was one of those with the little lashes? That would have been a totally different movie.
>> Wendy:It just felt like at any point, especially on the little kids, that those could have fallen off.
>> Bridget:Yeah.
>> Wendy:It seemed like a weird choice.
>> Bridget:I was thinking of Michael Jackson when he had Blanket
>> Wendy:just put a towel over its head.
>> Bridget:Yeah, Blanket. So it was super interesting how she taught the kids echolocation with the rocks. And she used clever tricks because they had to go from that cabin. They were looking for this place that's safe. And they've been talking on the radio. So she's gonna make her way down to the river where she has put a boat and hidden it. And blind, she's going down there. She's uncovering the boat. She's flipping it over. She's then going down the river with the kids. It's crazy.
>> Wendy:It's so crazy.
>> Bridget:It is so scary and crazy.
>> Wendy:Yeah.
>> Bridget:There is a man on the river and she kicks his a** with a machete. With a machete.
>> Wendy:Didn't cut him in half.
>> Bridget:Hits him with the oar. Yeah.
>> Wendy:It wasn't a. It would be funny if that song started playing. Oh, my God. But it must not have Been as sharp. But I was excited when she pulled out the machete. I was like, yeah.
>> Bridget:Yes.
>> Wendy:Get him.
>> Bridget:I was impressed that she had a machete at all. Yeah.
>> Wendy:And that she didn't manage to swipe either the kids in the process.
>> Bridget:Right.
>> Wendy:Because you really. As much as you think you've taught yourself, and maybe you would get better at it after five years, but knowing where another person is in reference to you. Yeah. That part was scary.
>> Bridget:Boy, girl.
>> Wendy:Yeah. And they call her Mallory, too.
>> Bridget:Yes.
>> Wendy:They don't call her mom.
>> Bridget:They don't know any better.
>> Wendy:They've never even met another kid besides each other.
>> Bridget:Speaking of the kids, how traumatizing would that be for the actors?
>> Wendy:For the actors.
>> Bridget:That's what I'm saying. And it's weird that such little kids are actors in the first place.
>> Wendy:I've always thought that.
>> Bridget:What is with that?
>> Wendy:Especially in horror films. This one, I feel like, definitely would be scary to film, but not as much as I've seen some other horror films. But kids are creepy. That's why they use them. Kids are creepy and they remind you of your vulnerability. Because it wouldn't have been as exciting if it was just her going down the river.
>> Bridget:That's true. Because she had these two little bundles of joy.
>> Wendy:Yeah.
>> Bridget:The supply run. Yeah, I had some issues with that.
>> Wendy:When they get in the car right
>> Bridget:before that, the Asian guy decides to try to watch a video of. Of it. Like a ring cam.
>> Wendy:Yeah. Security cam.
>> Bridget:Yeah, A security camera. And kills himself from watching that. Right after that, they are out of food. They really have to figure out a way to get to this store that a kid works at.
>> Wendy:Yeah. Charlie. Charlie Rip.
>> Bridget:I wrote Just don't go eat the as.
>> Wendy:It is. A little funny that that wasn't even brought up. They don't even talk about what they did with his body.
>> Bridget:They don't show up or anybody's body because, you know, you have to be blindfold, dragging it outside.
>> Wendy:It's just a curb. It's just a speed bump.
>> Bridget:Yeah.
>> Wendy:Those were bodies.
>> Bridget:Those were.
>> Wendy:Yeah, those were bodies. And yeah, the whole driving thing, I'm like this.
>> Bridget:They painted the windows black.
>> Wendy:Would never have worked.
>> Bridget:And they got so much.
>> Wendy:Yeah.
>> Bridget:And I was like. Like, where are you gonna put all that? Including birds in a cage.
>> Wendy:Yeah.
>> Bridget:That was crazy. But the whole title bird box is because she took those birds with her. And birds freak out when that presence is near.
>> Wendy:Yes.
>> Bridget:So it's a good tool to have.
>> Wendy:It's a canary in a coal mine situation. I guess it's Hope a little bit too. I was so surprised that those birds made it through the river, though. They would have been drowning.
>> Bridget:I was thinking of Legally Blind. I'm taking the birds.
>> Wendy:But the. The car scene, I mean, they had to get food somehow. I just don't think that plan would have worked for several reasons. One, GPS doesn't tell you where the curve is. And all these people had just been driving their cars into each other and killing themselves.
>> Bridget:Yeah.
>> Wendy:So there's cars everywhere. There's trucks, rocks blocking the road. There's bodies everywhere. Like, I. You would have hit something, and then you wouldn't have been able to figure out how to get around it.
>> Bridget:Right. It's crazy.
>> Wendy:A lot of the stuff they did, I'm like, it was cool to think about all the ways you could maybe get around it. When he does the security cam. That was what I was thinking in the beginning. I'm like, wonder if, like, Harry Potter. I'm bringing it up again. There's a basilisk that kills you if you look at it. But a few people, like, looked at it through a mirror or, like, reflection in the water, and they live. Oh. So I was like, well, maybe it's like that, but then we find out it's not the case.
>> Bridget:Yeah. Right.
>> Wendy:But if it can kill you through a camera, but it can't get in your house, that was weird too.
>> Bridget:Yeah.
>> Wendy:Because if it's like a spiritual entity, you'd think it could be able to go through walls and.
>> Bridget:Yeah.
>> Wendy:But we don't actually know what it is.
>> Bridget:I gotta bring up my favorite character.
>> Wendy:Okay.
>> Bridget:Machine Gun Kelly.
>> Wendy:Right.
>> Bridget:The first thing I wrote, Machine Gun Kelly. I love you. He plays Felix.
>> Wendy:Yeah.
>> Bridget:Some of his best lines are, we are so f****** f*****, and we are so f****** trapped. One time I saw him on Sunday. Sit down. And the interviewer was like, you're a sensi boy, aren't you?
>> Wendy:A sensi boy, like, sensitive.
>> Bridget:Yes.
>> Wendy:Okay.
>> Bridget:I was like, I like that. And yes, he is covered with tattoos, but I love him also. There's another girl, you know, they're both hot. And she's like, no. And then he's like, well, it's the end of the world, basically. You know? You know, you're gonna get lucky.
>> Wendy:Yeah.
>> Bridget:Yeah. Why not?
>> Wendy:Why not?
>> Bridget:Spend your time wisely, people.
>> Wendy:Yeah.
>> Bridget:Have the sack.
>> Wendy:Even when Sandra Bullock is still pregnant, Tom is hitting on her in the grocery store.
>> Bridget:Well.
>> Wendy:And she's like, you're only saying that because it's the end of the world. And he's like, maybe you're right. I don't know.
>> Bridget:But he was awesome.
>> Wendy:Yeah, he was. Tattoo.
>> Bridget:Oh, yeah. R. Oh, my God.
>> Wendy:So, yeah. But it's funny to be hitting on a pregnant woman. I think.
>> Bridget:I think people. People think that. Well, there's something beautiful about.
>> Wendy:Sure.
>> Bridget:Pregnancy.
>> Wendy:Yeah.
>> Bridget:Remember Matt always liked pregnant women's b****.
>> Wendy:Yeah. They do get bigger.
>> Bridget:Yeah.
>> Wendy:So there's that. It's a thing. But I would be weird about that. I don't know.
>> Bridget:Yeah.
>> Wendy:Someone else's kid in there. I don't know. That's how you want to meet the kid.
>> Bridget:Yeah. Yeah.
>> Wendy:You're not even gonna wait for it
>> Bridget:to get in the womb, Just poke at it.
>> Wendy:So the culmination of everything that she's going towards is like a utopian thing that she hopes exists. Because the whole time I'm thinking it could be a trick by these people that are trying to get you to see it. It does seem a little weird that he's putting out messages and trying to get people to come to where they're at, but it ends up being school for the blind.
>> Bridget:I know. And it doesn't affect them because they can't see. Freaking see it. And he's like, listen for the birds. They've got a whole aviary. They've got like a shelter over them. She's safe there. The kids are safe. And they meet other kids and they go play. I loved that.
>> Wendy:It's a really sweet moment. And the doctor's there, her OB gyn. So it was a full circle moment. And then she finally admits this is. And she names the kids Ophelia and Tom.
>> Bridget:Tom. Of course, Tom.
>> Wendy:After the mom and Tom.
>> Bridget:Perfect.
>> Wendy:The dad. Pseudo dad.
>> Bridget:Well, she was in fight or flight mode the whole time, you know, and now she can finally relax, get some sleep.
>> Wendy:I can only imagine how terrible you would sleep in this situation.
>> Bridget:Oh, my God.
>> Wendy:But yeah, so maybe in the future, like, everybody will just have to be blind so they don't have to look at the thing.
>> Bridget:I mean, would you poke your own eyes out?
>> Wendy:No, I'd probably just wear a blindfold. Yeah, that sounds painful and unnecessary, but no.
>> Bridget:You would wear a lovely sleep mask.
>> Wendy:You're right. I have one that protects my false eyelashes too, so.
>> Bridget:Oh, nice.
>> Wendy:Looks like. Like a bra, kind of after your.
>> Bridget:Oh, my God. On that note. Did we do it?
>> Wendy:I think we did it.
>> Bridget:We flick some beans.
>> Wendy:Okay, Love you.
>> Bridget:Bye. Bye. Party all night long.
