The Fearless Warrior Podcast

075: The Journey of a Small-Town Athlete to College Softball with Kelsey Gaston

• Amanda Schaefer

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For this week's episode I got the opportunity to interview my former teammate and friend, Kelsey Gaston! Kelsey and I were teammates at Concordia University where she played in the infield. After graduating, Kelsey went on to go to PT school and is now a practicing physical therapist. Kelsey’s journey from competitive athlete to a fulfilled physical therapist highlights the complexities of athletic identity and the emotional challenges faced post-competition. It encourages listeners to embrace their multifaceted selves and recognize the resilience built through sports.

Episode Highlights:
• Navigating personal identity after sports 
• The transition from athlete to professional life 
• The importance of diversifying athletic experiences 
• Building resilience through adversity 

Connect with Kelsey:

Instagram: @drkelsey.g

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Speaker 1:

Welcome to the fearless warrior podcast, a place for athletes, coaches and parents who know the value of a strong mindset. I'm your host, coach AB, a mental performance coach on a mission, former softball coach, wife and mom of three. Each episode we will dive deep into all things mental performance, mindset tools and how to rewire the brain for success. So if your goal is to gain the mental edge and learn the secrets of mental performance, mindset tools and how to rewire the brain for success, so if your goal is to gain the mental edge and learn the secrets of mental performance, you're in the right place. Let's tune in to today's episode. I have the pleasure of finally getting one of my closest, most best friends in the world. I have already been reminiscing and going back down memory lane. Kelsey has been a friend ever since college and we connected immediately and now we're grown and moms and running our lives and doing all the things. So I introduce to you Kelsey, welcome to the pod.

Speaker 2:

Well, hey, thanks for having me. This is so fun.

Speaker 1:

So let's put it into context, because this is going to be an amazing conversation. Tell us or I guess, tell the Fearless fam who are you, where are you located, what are you doing today, and we'll definitely go back in the timeline. But where are you at right now?

Speaker 2:

And we'll definitely go back in the timeline, but where are you at right now? Time travel a little bit. My name is Kelsey Gaston. Right now we live in, my husband and I and our two kids live in South Dakota. We moved up here a little over two years ago and I am a doctor of physical therapy, so I'm in the clinic training patients, you know, 40 hours a week and then chasing kids on the weekends and nights and things. But going backwards from there, I guess I went to PT school at Creighton in Omaha and then before that was where I met Amanda at Concordia playing softball and then prior to that or I guess, kind of where we can start at, if you want.

Speaker 2:

I'm from a small town, o'neill, nebraska, pretty small, very small, but mighty in the terms of like baseball softball world, like the baseball Legion teams were always good. Softball had a tradition of being very good. The classes and girls that came before us were always leading the charge. I mean, we were always classed like C, like the smallest classes, but would do really well in like summer tournaments. So yeah, that's kind of where we started and then played summer ball when I was a kiddo. Nothing competitive, nothing like club teams like they have now, even when I was in high school, I think the closest club team was like an hour and a half away and it was super competitive because of course it was the only one for hours and hours, um, but yeah, so just kind of a rec league like ASA.

Speaker 2:

I think it was softball tournaments and year we went before the board of our school board and got to convince them to give us softball as a school sanctioned sport. So then we got fall softball because we're in Nebraska and we play in the fall, which is silly. But here we are. So, yeah, my sophomore through senior year, I was able to play high school softball and that was really great. It was a lot of fun Still probably, no offense, amanda and Concordia crew, but like my favorite team that I was ever on probably those high school girls, man, we just had so much fun and made so many memories and worked our tails off and was able to play in college, which was like my goal since I was little. So yeah, it was great, it was fun. So where do you want to dive in?

Speaker 1:

I love this because I just had a conversation with somebody talking about this.

Speaker 1:

I feel like the landscape is changing, where people are starting to not put so much emphasis on high school sports and, you know, for lots of reasons of travel organizations and the expansion of you know, we used to play summer ball, like if you played a tournament in April.

Speaker 1:

It was unheard of, and now these teams are playing dome ball in February and March and like their season starts and then they go all the way through July. And I think that you've touched on something really cool is that there's something about high school sports which you didn't always have that luxury of having a high school team, so you only got to play three years of high school but the idea of, like a common goal. You have to fight for your starting position and some of these rosters on high school teams a lot of the clients that I'm working with you could have a roster of 30 kids and I don't know how many you guys had on your roster, but when you only have nine spots, it's it's nothing like travel, it's just a different, it's a different culture and I feel like things are changing. But guess what? High school prepares you for college. You know, like that's exactly what we had to deal with in college.

Speaker 2:

Yep, yep, absolutely, and that was like I think growing up, that was like a really integral part of like my development as an athlete was. You know, I played all the different sports. Like I played basketball, I played, uh, softball, I did track, I played volleyball in junior high and elementary school. Um, like, that was like one of the great things about living in such a small town is like you got the opportunity to just do everything. Um, you know, it wasn't so competitive that if you weren't the best of the best, you didn't make a team or whatever. Like everybody just got to play.

Speaker 2:

Like I did soccer when I was a kid. Like there was so many opportunities to do so many different things and I'm a little bit biased now because I'm a physical therapist but that's truly so good for young athletes to like do all the things and not be so specialized in doing so much of one thing all the time. Like it's so good for your development as an athlete to play multiple sports, be on multiple teams, be with multiple people. Like how much does that develop us to? As like teammates, to be around other people and like how do we fit in on this team versus that team? But, um, yeah, I don't know where that started, but that's the tangent we ended on.

Speaker 1:

I think it's great. I think that's part of the reason why I struggled so much. We could just like jump into like the roast of Amanda. But I think the reason that you and I connected is I think I was that one dimensional athlete where, like I think, you can squeak by in high school, but then once you get to college, I think we really bonded in the weight room because I was like, what am I doing? Which is ironic that I'm. That's what I'm doing now. As you know, I'm 33 and I'm just now.

Speaker 2:

I just texted you my PRs and I love it hitting PRs, the PRs.

Speaker 1:

I'm not even kidding. The PRs that I just texted you today, at 33 years old, with three kids and a body that is by no means anywhere near where we were in college Like we weren't lean, mean, fighting machines my people is now are bigger than my PRS when I was in my prime bigger than my PRS when I was in my prime and I'm like what? How is that even possible?

Speaker 2:

But you know, for athleticism, knowing how your body works, and like now you're a physical therapist, like you see it all the time yeah, absolutely, and I think that, like that was kind of a something I wanted to touch on at some point in this conversation of like I know you talk a lot about like identities and like you know, softball or being a softball player is just part of your identity. Like I think that's so, so important and such an important concept.

Speaker 2:

Like even at 32, I'm still like learning how to deal with this and learning some of this and I'm like gosh if I would have had Amanda as a coach, like how much further ahead would I be or how much suffering would I have saved myself had Amanda as a coach like how much further ahead would I be or how much suffering would I have saved myself?

Speaker 1:

It's so, it's so easy. What Think about? Like my own, like if we both would have known what we know now.

Speaker 2:

can we please have a reason Like what Right, right, right Cause it's like so much of and we can get into this now or later or whatever. But, like you know, in college so pre-college, junior, high, high school I had like three or four concussions. I had, like you know, four by the time I graduated high school from softball. And then, um, you know, going to college, freshman year was okay. Sophomore year, fall ball like exhibition game got a concussion. Came back, did okay, um, and then in the spring, our very first game down in Kansas in March or whatever it was, um, you know, got a concussion and I couldn't pass the impact test, like it was like months before I could pass the stupid test on the computer. So my brain was clearly telling me like it's time to be done. That was super hard for me.

Speaker 2:

But like, looking back now, it's like because I had so much of my identity like wrapped up in being a softball player, like I had, I still have such one track mind or like such tunnel vision sometimes on my goals that I'm like, you know, when I was in high school and we got high school softball as an option, you know I wanted so badly to play at the college level but I was like, I know I'm not going to get a lot of eyes on me because we're such a small school. I don't play on a competitive travel team, like how am I going to get these coaches attentions? And I knew where I lacked as an athlete. Like I knew I needed to be faster, be more mobile, like I knew these things. And I had that goal and I put my head down and, amanda, when I tell you I worked hard, like if you thought I worked hard in college, you have no idea. Like I would go out after practice and work out.

Speaker 2:

I over the summertime, like I gave myself a heat stroke one day because I was out on the high school track running in the heat of the day. Because that's when I got off. My little high school job at the grocery store, like when I had my mindset on something like that became my whole identity, that became my whole. Something like that became my whole identity, that became my whole goal. And when I realized that that was over for me because of concussions and I, like you know, all, all along through high school and college and everything, I'm like you know. You see people have shoulder injuries, like you did. Or you see people tear their ACLs, or like you see these things and I'm like man, you know if that happens to me, so be it like I wasn't afraid.

Speaker 2:

I never played afraid, because I'm like man, you know if that happens to me, so be it Like I wasn't afraid I never played afraid because I was like I can work hard, like I'm a hard worker that was part of my identity is like when the rubber meets the road, like I'm going to outwork you and I can recover from that and you're not, you're not getting too many times. There's only so much like physically you can do to work through that. Like you just can't rehab it. Like you do everything else.

Speaker 2:

And at that time especially, we didn't have rehab for concussions. I mean some places did, but no, none of our trainers or anybody knew how to rehab that. So like, could I have come back sooner? Could I have come back better potentially, but like I didn't have the resources. So that was huge for me in college. And like you know that you were there when I was going through that. Like that was such a hard shift of like, well, who am I now that softball is over? Who am I now that four or five, six years of work up to this point is now just poof gone, like over? You know, like what do I do now? And I think that's where, like you know, I'm still learning this. Like I said, it's like if, if, if, younger kids and younger adults can learn to tie their identity into you know, things that we can control like I am a daughter, I am a sister, I'm a friend.

Speaker 2:

Um, I am an athlete, not that I am a softball player, but I'm an athlete Like I can go do something else. I can go do a else, I can go do a marathon, I can be a competitive weightlifter. Like you know, athleticism doesn't end just because your sport ends. Athleticism doesn't end because of these different life changes. Like I follow a shout out Brianna Battles, I think her name is on Instagram. Like she's big on pregnancy and postpartum training and she says athleticism does not end when motherhood begins.

Speaker 2:

Like every, every phase of our life. Like we have to learn to develop and latch onto these identities that are truly within us and within our control and serve us. Like saying like oh, I'm a softball player and now I'm not anymore. Like that, that's true, but it's not true. You know, like, at my core, I'm an athlete, so I can take that with me through every phase of life. And you know, the parts of life where I've had valleys and I've struggled the most is like I've kind of forget about that part of me or I don't. I neglect that part of my identity and you know everything else suffers when I'm neglecting part of like who I feel like I am at my core.

Speaker 2:

So just wanted to make sure I threw that in there.

Speaker 1:

But your, your identity as a hard worker, when we we should have hit record sooner, but I was trying to go back on that timeline to remember and and when those concussions happened, and when you transition from you know playing on the field to a support role on the side to me, you were always there and I never that part of your identity never went away as your friend, because I knew that you were a hard worker and I knew that those connections were out of your control. And so, like I think about who Kelsey is and who Kelsey is now, and like nothing could take away who you were as a hard worker, and like some of the things that I still think about today are those stupid wall sits, and like I've talked about this on a pod, I think on a podcast or in an email, of like if I close my eyes at the gym this week and I have to do those wall sits, if I close my eyes I am immediately transported back to the annex wall sits. If I close my eyes, I am immediately transported back to the annex. Those that nasty carpet like beat up walls. Our whole team had to line up like a squadron and do two minute wall sits and I'm like, if I'm going to, if I'm going to do a freaking two minute wall sit and I don't want to quit. I'm going next to Kelsey like KT, like don't let to quit. I'm going next to Kelsey like KT, like don't let me quit.

Speaker 1:

And I remember you like would slap my legs and you're like beast, don't you quit, like don't you drop, and if we dropped we had to start over. It's like just right, just like I was not and I'll admit this. Like when it came to things that pushed me, that was not part of my identity, like Like I I wasn't and I'll admit this. Like I feel like I got lucky with like talent and I was one dimensional, like I wasn't an athlete, and so I really fed off of that in you, of like how do how do I? You know, I think that's what connected us is like you were there in the weaknesses that I had, and like we really leaned on each other through some of those like really crappy moments. Not that was absolutely crappiest, that was by far the least of our worries, of the things.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, no, absolutely. I think you're right, cause I was thinking about that too at one point here just recently and I was like you know, I think that is a lot of it Like you know, you had the accolades and the recognition and like everything that I was like oh my gosh, like if.

Speaker 2:

I could have had that in high school or like if anybody would recognize me like that, like I would be so confident, I would be so like swaggy, I would be like strutting around here and but it's like that wasn't who I was either. Like you know it, it just like it. It's part of our story and I think, like you said, it's part of what connected us so much.

Speaker 2:

It's like you knew how to go out there and be like I'm going to walk out on this mountain, I'm going to own every single one of those people in that lineup and like that's a part of that I really struggled with, like I knew I was going to like outwork you to the core, but like as far as like having to walk out there with your chest up and like be confident, like I didn't have that so, like you, that spark and you helped build that in me too because, like you know and we can talk about this if you want to but, like freshman year, you know, I had worked so dang hard and I purposely kept telling myself like you came here for a reason and you need to work hard at this because I didn't have a starting spot when we started.

Speaker 2:

You know, I had MAPES our friend Nicole MAPES, shout out MAPES in front of me at shortstop and you know, at that point I was only catching, like for practices and stuff, like I caught some in high school. Senior year of high school I switched to shortstop. You know, I kind of went to college planning on playing shortstop because my needs were like, hey, we're kind of sick of catching. So that was my goal, that was my plan.

Speaker 2:

And you know I had a couple of D1 offers from small schools in South Dakota. But it's like I wanted to go to Concordia because they had a record of like being good and being competitive and making it to nationals. And I'm like I don't want to go to a d1 team just because they're d1 and get the crack beat out of us all the time, like I'm a competitor to the core and if I had a 2 and 37 record, like I was going to be mad about it, like that was not gonna, that was not gonna do it for me. Just to say I was a d1 athlete, so like no shame against d1 athletes or people on those teams. They, they're all competitors, they all work super hard. But that's just like not where my heart was. I was just like I would rather go somewhere and compete, like have to truly compete for a starting spot and earn it if I got it and um and like compete at a high level and be competitive at a high level. So sorry, I kind of got off track now with my train of thought, but like you know that was part of it too of like you me feeding, feeding that confidence from you, of like okay, I've put in the work and as if I just keep putting in the work like my time will come, my time will come, like I just have to have confidence in myself and in my skills and all of this hard work, like all of this history and this pile of proof over here that you know I've worked hard and I deserve this, that it will come.

Speaker 2:

And you know it took a long time. I think it was against Morningside. So in the conference tournament of our freshman year I finally got my shot. You know, I got to go into shortstop and be in the lineup and I don't remember exactly, but I think I did pretty good. But it just felt good to get to that point of like you know, I don't look, looking back I mean I'm sure he did at the time, but like, looking back, it's like there was times I was like frustrated but I never doubted that I would get the opportunity.

Speaker 2:

You know, and I think, like I said, it's because, like, if you do the things and you can look back and you say, okay, I did X, y, z and I worked and gave 110% at all those things like the results will eventually come, like it was not going to be today, it might not be tomorrow, it might not be next week, but if you consistently and honestly like, put in your full effort and your full behind every rep, behind every practice, if you truly lay it all out there, like it will come around in time. You know, and I think that's so important Like it's so easy to get stuck, stuck in the like sucking and the suffering, and like we all have that as like human nature of like you know, we start to tell ourselves stories about like well, I'm not starting, so coach doesn't like me, or or coach was critiquing me on this, so he thinks I suck at batting because I can't do this drill right, or whatever.

Speaker 2:

Like we all like take these things that happen that are like little finite, like factual things, like oh, I was dropping my bat when I was swinging or whatever. But then it's like what's the story we build behind that and is that distracting us from where we need to go? Or is that like helping us and being constructive and where we need to go? You know what I'm saying? Like we just tend to like get so stuck in our suffering sometimes that we just we get so far down this story that it's like wait a second, bring it back, like what actually happened, what were the facts of what actually went down? And then from there, like what did I do about it? How do I respond?

Speaker 2:

Because if you take that and take it for what it's worth, that face value, and learn from it and then build on it, it's like that's where the results will eventually come. But if we stay in that story that we tell ourselves of like well, coaches, just pissed at me, you know we can get so far removed and then we start bringing teammates down with us you know what I mean? Like we've all been on teams like that, where we get so stuck in this sob story of like, oh, what was me? I don't have the starting spot. I work as hard as everybody else. Like you, can't get stuck in that zone of thinking. You can't get stuck in the sob stories and like the suffering that we tell ourselves that we're going through.

Speaker 1:

I think that's exactly why you got those opportunities, because I think you, you were relentless in that. And if anyone went through some crap, like think about our core unit and think about all the variables, and we tell you know, we can say this now because hindsight's 2020 and we're time traveling. But I think about our freshman class, the two girls from Texas um, who else did we have? We had like a class of like 10 or 11. And then, by the time we did.

Speaker 1:

it was, you know, us, five or six, five or six, yeah, yeah. And I think you know we can hash all of this and we can like tell some hilarious stories of like we we both faced injuries our freshman year. We was it freshman year that we had Chuck and and law who, what year was that where we didn't have a coach, basically our assistant coaches, like step up, was that fresh?

Speaker 2:

because when we it was freshman year, because remember Caroline was her name, caroline yeah, like sent us an email like three weeks before school started, like hey guys, sorry, goodbye, I'm leaving. I met her once.

Speaker 1:

I wasn't even by her because I was a Dana transfer. Oh yeah, that's right yes, yeah, yeah like I had just committed and then like a week later, it's like school is supposed to start in two weeks. That was wild.

Speaker 1:

Right, so I think about like you want to talk about mentally tough and I don't use the term mentally tough. I really don't think our assistant coaches knew what they were doing, and I would love, I would love a little bit of perspective. You tell me, dr Kelsey, we were doing and I don't know why this number sticks out in my mind we were doing four minute circuits and I'm pretty sure they only gave us like 30 seconds of rest and we did that four times, twice. Don't you do remember those days we would get up at?

Speaker 1:

We had to be at the field house at 6 am, we would get up for an hour, and then we'd go down to the weight room and we'd lift for an hour. We did that every day and then at 8 am class.

Speaker 2:

Yes.

Speaker 1:

I mean when we, when I'm saying like freshman year, pretty sure, like freshman year was like the most buff, like then we'd go to the cafeteria. Remember the egg lady.

Speaker 2:

Yes, I miss her. Oh my gosh, she made the best eggs over easy eggs and egg whites like who eats that we had to like refuel our bodies no kidding, but yeah, I mean, and I like that like it's so easy, as, like society and humans in general, like you said, like to get stuck in the suck and like you know, I think that's part of what happened with some of those girls, that didn't end up graduating with us, right, they like went off and did something else or went somewhere else.

Speaker 2:

It's like, if you can't figure out how to like pull yourself out of that and see, you know the goal way down the road, and that's what we're working for. We're not working for today, we're not working for tomorrow, we're working for six, eight months from now. You know it's it's the people that can do that that are the most successful. It's not the people that like never suffer or never struggle, like I you I've heard you bring it up before, like your little spiel that you did at the school where you talked about like oh, so and so didn't start this company until they were 45. And, and Michael Jordan got cut from this team or that team or whatever.

Speaker 2:

And I think sometimes we're so quick to like hear those stories and kind of gloss over the, the messiness in the middle, like we're just like, oh, he was cut from his high school team, but now he's like the greatest of all time. Well, you don't think there was a month or two months or three months in there, probably, where he was at home and he was upset and he was crying and he was thinking this wasn't worth it. It's like we all go through stuff like that in our lives and like we've been there for each other through a lot of this stuff. Right, like life is hard and crappy, the crappiest of crappy things can happen, and it's like we need that time to process and we need that time to be in the messiness and be in the suffering. But it's like the, you know, no one writes history books about the people who stay in that area. Right, like you have to latch onto those identities, like we were talking about earlier.

Speaker 2:

Like who am I truly at my core? Like who do I want to be? Or maybe it's not even somebody who I've been before. Who do I want to be? Do I want to be somebody that's stuck in this suffering cycle of just like staying down and the world kicking the crap out of me? Or am I going to like figure out how to be somebody who stands up and kicks down the door and says I'm coming out of this hole, like I am not staying here anymore? You know, I think that can I mean at any level. Right, like high school or college or whatever.

Speaker 2:

Like sorry to break it to you, but life kind of sucks. Like life is unfair at times, like it's great and it's beautiful and there's amazing things that happen too, but you have to get through some of that sucky stuff first. Um, or sometimes along the way, like in the in-between, and, like I said, I think all the cliches and all of the like happy thoughts and happy things in the world, it's like that doesn't help when you're stuck in that hole. So like when you're in that hole, you have to figure out what is going to help pull you out and, like I said, it's not for tomorrow, it's not for the next day. Sometimes it's not for a while down the road. But it's like if you can find that identity and act as if that person that you want to be or that skill that you want to have, and build those little deposits every day of adding up and adding up to be that person, it's like you. We can get through a lot. We're resilient human beings.

Speaker 1:

I think that's what made our freshman class so fricking strong. And then I was even thinking about it.

Speaker 1:

Like Kelsey, we're not talking like eight months of suffering, like we suffered for three years and had coaching, changes and battles to get to our senior year, where we did make a national birth.

Speaker 1:

And I I think about when Todd came in we were all scared out of our minds and like he worked harder than we ever worked. But like I and and you know I can say this with with an open mind too of like our grade, like our core unit, like we, when we were at practice and when we were in the vans and when we were lifting, like we had each other's backs. We may not have been like the best friends off the field, but like what made us so successful is exactly what you're talking about is like the girl to my right and the girl my left, like we're in this and we're in this suckiness, like we're gonna lean on each other, like and then we can go right. What did shelby and baldwin used to do? You guys would all like pile into one dorm room and like we would play video games or like watch movies.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, just like mentally unplugged, shelby used to watch fox and the hound and like why are you watching sad movies?

Speaker 1:

it's like you just have to like we're in this sadness together, right trauma bonding again that's the question is like, even with everything that we went through and and I I'll tell all of my college girls right now that I work with, I will be the first one to tell you that college is really, really freaking hard. And in the same breath, I would go back, I would always thousand percent, I would relive thousand percent, and again and again and it's one of those things like maybe we're just far enough removed now.

Speaker 2:

But you know, I think even at the time I was like that way, like I just constantly had it in the back of my head of like that little 12 year old, audacious little girl inside of me like who watched the college world series on the TV for the first time and started listening to the commentators and talking about how these girls are working out and I was like 13, 14. And I'm looking up like how to train like a softball player. Amanda, I found, did I send you a Snapchat of this A few months ago? My kids were playing in my parents' basement, so now my children were playing in my parents basement, so now my children are playing in my old room and stuff where I grew up, and they found a notebook like an old like diary, like one of those fuzzy like outside ones you know I'm talking about it's like purple fuzzy I think I got it from like Girl Scouts or something.

Speaker 2:

So I like opened it up and they were like oh, mommy, what's this say?

Speaker 1:

and there was like a date on it and I, I count, I did the math and I, I would have been like 13, I think, and there was workouts written in the notebook.

Speaker 2:

I remember like I would watch college softball and I've watched college basketball and they would talk about like the training and the stuff that they did, and like I would go to the school library and find like magazines because the internet wasn't a thing.

Speaker 1:

We didn't have a computer at our house yet we're old now.

Speaker 2:

but like any sort of information like that, I was so into it because I was like man, I got to make this happen Like I, just in my head. I I was 10 feet tall and there was no stopping me Like I was going to make this happen. So maybe that's part of like you know.

Speaker 2:

maybe when if, if you have some girls that are struggling in college stuff right now and making that adjustment, it is a huge adjustment. But, like, also, you have to think about, like, who started this dream? Like who is that little girl in there that had this big, audacious dream that everyone, maybe a lot of people, said would never happen? Cause that was me. I had a basketball coach in high school that said, like you're never going to get an offer anywhere, you know, and I wore that chip on my shoulder and I was not going to let that win, you know. So it's like, as much as it sucks in the moment, like I feel like maybe for that reason, I had a better attitude.

Speaker 2:

Maybe at times not all the time I'm not saying I definitely wasn't happy about waking up at 6am all the time, it definitely wasn't fun all the time but I think I just had like such a like I just appreciated it so much more than some of our teammates and especially like a lot of the girls that ended up quitting, cause it's like for them it was just like the expectation, it was just like that's the next step, like you're on this super good travel ball team, so you go play college somewhere, but their heart wasn't in it. For me, my heart was always, always, always in it, like even on the days that I didn't want to be there, even on the days that we were dog tired, even on the days that we were banged up and hurt, like I just was like this is all I wanted, like this is all I ever wanted. So why am I not going to like enjoy it even though it sucks, and enjoy every second of it, and enjoy who I'm doing it with, you know?

Speaker 1:

Yeah, amen. I would say for me. I really experienced that for the first time of like and again, like I could fall into both categories. I did have the accolades in high school Like I was the best pitcher, like I, I was on the stat board, like I broke every record in high school. And so my freshman year and then I've talked about this on the podcast freshman year, because I just assumed that it would be just like high school and then, you know, when I was giving up home runs and not getting that starting position as a pitcher, you know I was like what, what, this doesn't happen to AB, what, what's going on here? And then I made it mean something about me, you know.

Speaker 2:

Right, right, right. And there goes back to our identities right Like, your identity wasn't just in like. I'm AB and I'm a strong athlete and I'm also really good at this position. It was like no, I'm AB the pitcher and that's it. I rock it.

Speaker 1:

You know what I mean.

Speaker 2:

And then it's like as soon as there's as soon as there's a little bit of erosion. In that, it's just like we are sitting here like, well, now, what the heck do we do like? This is so foreign to me, you know, and I think that's where a lot, of a lot of our teammates and stuff struggled at times, cause it's like they were the best of the best, and now you're playing with everybody's best of the best, and it was really tough.

Speaker 1:

Yeah Well, I just talked about that with one of my clients out of Georgia and I I gave her that perspective shift of like I want you to imagine you know I always use the analogy of four hole hitter I want you to take the four hole hitter from every high school within a hundred mile radius and I want you to put it on a super team. That's college. And her eyes got really big and she was like, oh my gosh, yeah, you're right. And I said, well, how many of your girls from your high school team went on to play college? And like, think about those statistics. Right, right, right. I wish somebody would have told me that, as I'm like, well, home run there was, it was against Peru. We need to get Nat Nat on the podcast.

Speaker 1:

I remember home run why, this one sticks out to me. It was like a flat curve ball and I saw that home run and I didn't know this rule. It like hit the yellow part of the fence you know the like fence cap and then it bounced over. I was like there's no way, that's a home run. That's embarrassing, like this is so stupid. Yep, umpire's going with his fingers. And I just remember turning and looking at nat nat and she just like shrugged her shoulders. She's like what do you want me to do? Like you gave up the home run.

Speaker 2:

I can see her. I can see her now Like yeah, like figure it out.

Speaker 1:

Oh my gosh.

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Speaker 1:

What memory sticks out to you Like what, what memories?

Speaker 2:

Oh man, I don't know.

Speaker 1:

Do you remember when we got in trouble for moving?

Speaker 2:

the bench moving the bench.

Speaker 1:

remember our dugouts were so tiny and we thought if we moved the benches out of the dugout we like, hauled one of the benches over to right feet or left and the the city emailed our coach at Plum Creek at Plum Creek. Did I rope you?

Speaker 2:

I do not remember this.

Speaker 1:

What the text, or Shelby, or maybe it was Topal, I don't know, but we like moved the benches because we thought, well, fine, it's, you know. Now they expanded, they've renovated the fields now, but we got in trouble with the city and I'm pretty sure Frank made us run for that maybe I don't know, my memory's not so good. Remember many concussions, too many uh, oh man, I don't okay. So Arizona do you remember when you got into med school?

Speaker 2:

yeah, that was pretty crazy, because it was like 5 am or something like it was something super early. It was probably not that early.

Speaker 2:

It was like 5 am or something like it was something super early, it was probably not that early it was like 6 am because of the time change and so it was like 8 am back home because, remember when we were in Arizona, they don't do like daylight savings either. So it went from being like one hour to two hours difference. So it was like as soon as the admissions office had opened up, I was like getting these phone calls from an Omaha number and and I was like I don't know who this is. I'm trying to sleep. It's 6am, like we're on spring break. We have to be up in a couple hours to go warm up or whatever. Anyways, I'm like who is calling me?

Speaker 2:

And then they finally leave a message and you happen to be out on the balcony and remember those like gardening, like there was a hotel was like this big square and like in the middle was like a garden and a fountain and it was all pretty and the sunshine was coming in and I like take my phone out there because I'm trying to be quiet. Is everybody sleeping? And it was like somebody from the admissions office at Creighton and I was like, oh my gosh, kelsey, like you filled out your application wrong, you screwed something up and they can't like they need more information.

Speaker 1:

I knew immediately. I was, like you, like, pointed to your phone and I remember looking.

Speaker 2:

It was like oh my gosh, no, no, no, that was before, so like when I was listening to the voicemail it was like, oh, this is so-and-so, from the admissions office at Creighton, like we just had a few things we needed to talk to you about, and so I was like, oh my god, like what did I say in my interview? Or like what did I screw up, like that they. And then when I called her, she was like, oh, I was like, oh, yeah, I needed to talk to admissions. Like I had some, they had some questions or something for me. She's like who is this? And I was like Kelsey and she was like, oh, she's like we just wanted to offer you a spot in our class and I was like that's when I was like, yeah, immediately running laps running laps along the second floor of this hotel.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, yeah, that was pretty fun, that was legit senior, I think honestly like far like that

Speaker 1:

big trip. We went down to arizona that spring break trip. We were undefeated for like the first 12 games. We went undefeated on spring break and then we got home and then we continued our undefeated streak. Like that we knocked off like grand view. They were like ranked. We played somebody else that was ranked and like I think senior year is like that moment of like you got into med school, like this was the last run, we were playing for each other. We had been changing changes, like Todd was our coach.

Speaker 2:

Todd was there and he was rocking it. Yeah, it's like this.

Speaker 1:

is it like we had a blast?

Speaker 2:

Yeah, it was so fun. Honestly, I think I've always been bad at remembering like the scores or the records or like the like, my new details, like I don't know what zone I would go to in my mind when I was playing, but it was just like next play, next play, next play, next play.

Speaker 2:

And you could ask me about like four innings ago and I might not even remember, like I just like I don't know compartmentalize it or something, but like the thing that I always remember the most was like the van rides Like you know what I mean. Like, like you said, our core group in that stupid van singing Mr Brightside or ironic or whatever the case is like it was just always so fun and, like you said, it's like, of course we suffered plenty together and there was plenty of downtimes, and I'm sure there's plenty of games where we got our tail kicked when we shouldn't have or we lost a close one when we shouldn't have, and there was a lot more somber. You know, rides home in the van too, but okay, you just have to go through all of it.

Speaker 1:

Now, as we post this podcast, I'm going to have to go hunt for the photo of us sleeping in the van. Also, it was when?

Speaker 1:

okay, first of all, if you guys didn't want to look it up. There was an app called mine. It was like the, the free Tik TOK app and we were doing the WAP and like all these things. Do you guys remember when you put Pitch Perfect, I had not seen Pitch Perfect. Do you remember the opening scene of Pitch Perfect and I had not watched it yet and all of you guys were turned around in the van watching me watch this movie for the first time? Do you remember that?

Speaker 2:

Vaguely. Yeah, it's vaguely.

Speaker 1:

It was the puke scene. The puke scene. And then I'm in the van and I'm going, oh, and everyone turns around and goes puke scene.

Speaker 2:

I thought you were gonna bring up that stupid like call me maybe, or whatever, with all the busloads of baseball boys yeah, that was.

Speaker 1:

That was like the first viral video.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, probably no, but I think that's like like, like you said, like all the wins and losses and yeah, and going to nationals was super fun and super cool and I wouldn't trade any of that for anything, but it's like you got to enjoy the ride too. You know what I mean, like, quite literally, the band rides that never end for us. Um, you know, like those times being with your teammates, like that's, that's what I treasure more than anything, that's what I remember more than anything, for whatever reason look at us now.

Speaker 1:

We're bridesmaids in each other's weddings and yeah, we were all the things. We're gonna have to pull up some, some cool photos. Well, this is fun. I we should do more of these. We need to get nat now on the podcast. We should get the whole group together.

Speaker 2:

You know, I was just thinking that the other day, like last week, I was like man. I feel like every year we talked about it like the spring we need to have like a reunion game or something that we all go to plum creek together and that's the thing is like we don't even need to play, like we should just go no, no just to watch, oh to watch.

Speaker 1:

Todd wanted us to like scrimmage. He wanted us to like scrimmage, the youngins. I'm like, no, that would be really fun though I would do that, you wouldn't do that. Now that I'm, now that I'm more in shape, yes, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2:

A couple years ago after having babies.

Speaker 1:

I would have have told you like heck, no, I ain't blowing my AC Play like wiffle ball.

Speaker 2:

That would be fun.

Speaker 1:

Yeah. I did went to Concordia last year and I like checked out the annex. The annex, for all of you guys that want to know, is literally like an out, not an outhouse, it's. It's literally like a tin building. It's a Quonset building. It's a's a closet building with one door. That's not even or no, actually there are two doors, weren't allowed to open them, it's just. It's like stinky cages with like really old carpet.

Speaker 2:

It's the best way, it's still there. Do they still use it?

Speaker 1:

if they still use it, it looks crazy. Exactly the same, except for new nets.

Speaker 2:

That's the only thing I was gonna say new nets more than pictures of whatever we were just talking about, we need pictures of the annex. That's what we should. That's what we should put up post, that's the. That's the burning question on everyone's mind.

Speaker 1:

I'm sure of it yeah, all good things, get me some ice and I'll try not train her. I will never post pictures of him on my on my instagram.

Speaker 2:

Inside jokes you gotta get back to where I will never forget that, that that quote right, probably ever those are some weird, weird years bloody mary, fairy boat.

Speaker 1:

I don't even get them. No, we're not even gonna go into that one. We're not even gonna go into that one when we went to San Francisco. All right, oh yeah, it's Julia's birthday today. Okay, oh yeah, shout out.

Speaker 2:

Julia, I love. Julia my 15, my 14 baby. I don't know why I just said 15. We shared the number. She got it when I couldn't take it anymore well.

Speaker 1:

So we went to San Francisco. Long story short, a bunch of kids from the Midwest, we Julia was from the Bay Area and we go hey, jules, what are we supposed to wear? You know, we don't want to look like sore thumbs in San Francisco. And she goes no big deal, just deal, just wear some jeans and a cute top. We're like all right, we got this. Remember when we used to like roll our jeans into capris. That was like the thing.

Speaker 2:

I could never do that, cause I was too short.

Speaker 1:

We all have like just Nebraska blue jeans. And here comes Julia. She walks out to the vans in purple acid washed like cool jeans. We're like those are not jeans. It's like you're from the bay area. We all look like a bunch of hicks that have.

Speaker 2:

Those are like your party pants, these are my pitch and hay pants. That's the difference, memories, oh man. That was fun though.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, that was fun yeah, we went a lot of places. So well, kelsey, this was amazing. Um, you do have an Instagram. We can post your Instagram and relive the good days. Kelsey, I just have loved just all the evolutions of our lives and between playing and motherhood, and business and jobs and states. I love you absolutely ditto.

Speaker 2:

Couldn't have done it without you any of it yeah, well, podcast fam until next time.

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Amanda Schaefer

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