The Fearless Warrior Podcast

086: Why Waiting to Give Her Mental Skills is Prolonging Her Frustration (and yours as a parent!)

• Amanda Schaefer

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Are you considering joining the Fearless Warrior Program? Then this week's episode is for you! I invited a few of our Fearless Parents to come and share the good, the bad, the skepticism, and all their doubts they had when first discovering Fearless. They share how the program helped their daughters both on and off the field and how much it helped them reach their potential as softball players. If you have questions about whether this program is right for your daughter, this episode is full of insight that will help you make your decision!


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Speaker 1:

Welcome to the Fearless Warrior Podcast, a place for athletes, coaches and parents who know the value of a strong mindset. I'm your host, coach AB, a mental performance coach on a mission, former softball coach, wife and mom of three. Each episode, we will dive deep into all things mental performance, mindset tools and how to rewire the brain for success. So, if your goal is to gain the mental edge and learn the secrets of mental performance, mindset tools and how to rewire the brain for success, so if your goal is to gain the mental edge and learn the secrets of mental performance, you're in the right place. Let's tune in to today's episode.

Speaker 2:

All right, this is the parent panel. I'm so excited to have a few parents out of many that have had their daughter graduate as part of the fearless warriors, and so they're going to pull back the curtain tonight and give you their honest opinions, their fears, their worries, the good, the bad, the ugly. I also have coach Kara on with me, so, super informal tonight, it's just going to be a really fun conversation. So with that, do we want to go around and just say your name, your daughter's name and where you're from?

Speaker 3:

All right, I'll start. My name is Kelly and my daughter's name is Andy, and we are from Tampa, florida.

Speaker 4:

My name is Luann, I'm from Des Moines, iowa, and my daughter's name is Harper.

Speaker 6:

I'm Erica, my daughter's name's Chloe and we're from Artesia, New Mexico.

Speaker 2:

I'm James, my daughter's name is Sophia and we are from Indiana Amazing, I'm super thankful that you guys are all here and for those of you guys that are just joining us, we'll just keep kind of that same popcorn order. For ease of answering, let's just dive right in. I want you guys to back up three months, six months. Give us an idea of you know. How long has your daughter been in Fearless Warriors? When did you sign up and what were kind of your struggles before signing up for mental skills training, like what led you to discover this?

Speaker 3:

So I'll start. Andy and I joined the program in January and what led us to that point was, you know, she's been playing travel softball and you know, when she first started playing the game, she loved it and had so much fun playing with her friends and sharing that, even with me as a mom, out there on the field. And then, as time wore on and it got more competitive, I saw her shrieking back, almost as if to like not trying, as if she didn't try. Then she wasn't failing right, because she wasn't giving her her full effort, and you know you can pick up on that as a coach and a parent, you see it. And she finally came to me and said I don't want to play anymore. And I felt like, well, I constantly was like well, can you give me a reason why? What, what, what is it? Tell me what it is about? You don't want to play. And the reasons were not. I didn't feel they were genuine. I felt like, um, she was fishing. I didn't even really know if she knew why she didn't want to play anymore and I didn't want the reason to be, you know, because she couldn't manage the pressure of it, because that's what life's about it's there's plenty of pressure and stress coming at you in life, and if you can't manage it on a softball field, you know, then that's not a good indication of you know how you're going to manage it in life.

Speaker 3:

So, knowing that I finally, I finally got out of her, that she felt like she was letting her team down and I think she was just having a lot of negative self-talk around it. And she didn't. She didn't like that pressure, she didn't like that stress. So I went out, you know, trying to figure out where to go from here, cause I felt like I needed a third party as well, cause she didn't want to hear it from mom. And, um, you know, I had listened to your podcast because, as I said, I coached the team too. So I'm always looking for for stuff for my girls in general and the team too. So I'm always looking for for stuff for my girls in general and, um, that's what led me, led me to your program.

Speaker 2:

I don't even think I knew that. I knew that we had hopped on a discovery call and just had a really cool conversation, and I just want to applaud you for being curious, cause I think a lot of parents are afraid to kind of dig in and get curious, especially when they want to quit, and so, um, I'm just, I'm so glad that that you guys are here, thank you.

Speaker 4:

So my journey is similar to Kelly's and that I also coached my daughter, um, and coaching 10 year old girls last year Um, definitely looking for like ways to help improve their confidence is what led me to me to the fearless warrior program and then learning about the retreat, like right before the retreat was set to start, and fortunately my daughter was able to get one of like a late spot in it. So that was our first experience with fearless warriors, was going to retreat and Harper absolutely loved it. She had a great time, learned a lot of great skills, came back like so much more confident. She was ready for tryouts and ready to start the season. And I kept it in the back of my mind like hey, we really need to do the program. But it's like we're busy, fall ball was happening and life just kind of got away from us. And then you know we're practicing in the winter and she wants a new bat and like it just kept nagging at me that like why am I going to buy her a new bat? Like why, why is a bat? Okay, I'm going to spend this money on a bat, but like I want her to have skills that last her far beyond the bat, um, the life of the bat.

Speaker 4:

My big, my big pull for the retreat was I'm about to send my kid to middle school. Um, and middle school is so much more scary than the softball field. Like I wanted her to have skills to decide, like who she is. I don't want other people to decide when she can be confident in things, like she can decide, like I, I own this and I'm confident. And so that was, that was the big pull for me.

Speaker 4:

Um, we've seen huge, um huge progress in the way that she handles herself on the mound and not spiraling, you know, out of control after a few, a few pitches. She can really like pull it together and still be that like that leader for her team, even when it's not going fantastic. And that was, that was really what I was looking for. So she finished, she did the program January, february timeframe and she kind of just did it on her own. We talked a little bit about stuff, we we typically do some of the calls together, but she adores coach AB and so I think that was her big, her big motivator for getting it done. I didn't have to push her. She was ready to go, she knew she had to do the program if she wants to go back to the retreat. So she was all in.

Speaker 2:

That's awesome, so you got a little a little carrot, you got a dangle. I was like hey.

Speaker 4:

I mean, I love the retreat, you love the retreat, but we've got to do the program if you're going back.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, yeah. And one of the cool things is when you guys signed up for the program I actually saw your email come through and I thought you guys had signed up for the Nebraska in-person camp that we ran I was like, oh my gosh, they're driving all the way here to her and it was the program, which is great.

Speaker 4:

So, yeah, I do remember that Maybe we'll get an in-person camp eventually, but I'll come to Iowa retreats.

Speaker 5:

fun too, Erica what you got, okay. So last spring, um, my husband and I helped coach our daughter's league slash travel team and I would just see I wouldn't see her confidence be failing, but I would see we'd be practicing, She'd be a practice, or even in a game and an attitude would sneak out or she would just not be very nice and I can't do it. I'm not going to do it and we'd like well, you have more, you can. We believe in you, and we just didn't know how to help her from there. So I started on this journey. I first started with books, and they were good, don't get me wrong, they were good books. I started reading them for myself too, me wrong, they were good books. Um, I started reading them for myself too.

Speaker 5:

And last summer I don't know how, fearless warriors popped up on my Facebook, but it and I was like, oh, fearless, fast pitch, it must have to do with pitching. So I started following it, going through it, and then I just started reading the things that would pop up. Well, last September, we had joined a new travel team. Her dad and I stepped back from coaching. We had joined a new travel team, her dad and I stepped back from coaching, which was the best decision for us and her. And then it just it started rolling and rolling and I was like, well, let's try this out.

Speaker 5:

You know, I'd started listening to the podcast, I'd read everything that popped up on Facebook and I said, really, what have we got to lose If we're going to invest all this money in a back? That may or may not work? Let's try it, there's nothing wrong with it. So we jumped in and tried it. We would do the calls together. We went through the program together. I did the parent training. We listened to the podcast episodes a couple of times a week, even just listening to some of the older ones we hadn't heard yet.

Speaker 2:

So good, I forget about the podcast, because a lot of the times we you know our whole team, it's a whole team effort. So I'm sure, kara, you're like loving the podcast and if you're listening to this on the replay, you're probably listening to it on the podcast. That's awesome.

Speaker 7:

Podcast was my baby for a long time. It's no longer my baby, but it was dear to my heart still.

Speaker 2:

James, what comes to mind when you think about before Sophia took the leap for mental training?

Speaker 6:

um, a lot more frustration on the field than she's showing right now. Um, we joined in january, I believe, and, uh, I remember that, like, I listened to a lot of podcasts. I consume a lot of podcasts, so I don't even know where I found you guys at, but somehow it popped up and I'm I'm current now, so I'm all the way through it. Um, but I do remember the moment that I decided that we needed to do something besides put in just the physical work we do pitching lessons. We had a pitching lesson one weekend and I could just see the frustration on her face, something that she loved doing. It just looked like she did not know they don't want to do much anymore. And we did all the physical stuff and it was time to try something else. And I listened to the podcast and looked you guys up, and that's when I made a decision.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, very cool, and we have Paul joining us. Paul, do you want to do a quick? We just did your name, your daughter's name and where you guys are from.

Speaker 8:

Can you guys hear me.

Speaker 2:

Heck yeah.

Speaker 8:

Okay, yeah, okay, I I'm driving home. I told you I was working till eight. Uh, so yeah, I just finished up, um but, yeah, sorry, I might have. I might have missed that I was. I was touching my phone while driving, so I shouldn't do that. But, um, yeah, so I'm paul, my daughter's abby, um, and uh, she's a pitcher, she's 14 years old, and, sorry, what else did you want me to say?

Speaker 2:

uh, where are you guys from?

Speaker 8:

oh, so we're uh from just outside toronto, uh, ontario, canada we're international baby, I think we have yeah countries, so yeah yeah we're kind of going around the room, the.

Speaker 2:

The question that, uh, we're really talking about is you know, what did you see that your daughter was struggling with before mental training, and, like what, what kind of led you to make this decision to invest in mental training?

Speaker 8:

we were a little bit late to the game. You know, we, um, we didn't know how competitive this could, this could get. You know, we just kind of started in house league at a very sort of recreational level and and my daughter, um, you know, excelled and she's very gifted physically and so, um, she didn't even start pitching until about a year and a half ago, but she would turn heads all over the place and as we started to play competitively she really struggled and I felt bad as a parent because I had just totally overlooked how much pressure she was being put under and what the mental aspects of the game were, because she was a little bit later. So, you know, seeing her, you know, literally break down in tears on the mound in situations where she just had no tools and no strategy to be able to cope with that was just heartbreaking.

Speaker 8:

And, you know, I felt like, you know, we had kind of failed her as parents, you know, to put her in those situations. So, yeah, so we had reached out to her pitching coach, who wasn't familiar with the program but had heard of it, and so, you know, did a little bit of research and and we said, okay, like we got to find some, some things to give her some tools to help her out. And, um, you know, uh, she started last september. So you know, eight, nine months later she's a totally different player, totally, totally changed her mentality. She has tools to use, she has go-tos when she's in a tough spot, she knows how to work through it.

Speaker 8:

It's, it's, I don't know, what we would have done without it, like we wouldn't have been able to continue if we had not found some way to help her. You know, handle, handle that stress and uh, and this program is, as you know, been a huge, huge part of that. So thank you very much.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, it's an honor to have you on the call.

Speaker 2:

I, I love seeing Abby show up every week and that's the thing is that when I get to know your daughters, one of the things that I that you guys have all kind of touched on is, you know, I love our podcast, um, but it's, you know, I feel like sometimes we're shouting into the void. And you know, challenge week this week we did challenge week this past week on zoom for the first time and for me to be able to connect with each of your daughters, I think is what's really my superpower, in that I didn't want this to be a book. You know, six years ago I thought about putting these skills into a workbook and it just didn't feel like an energetic match because I want to see them, I want to coach them, just like we would coach them as a pitching coach or as their travel coach, and so, yeah, I just have loved getting to know your daughters and it's cool how they can connect with each other in the breakout rooms. And, you know, carrie, you can talk about mentorship calls even.

Speaker 7:

Yeah, those have been super awesome, just like the opportunity to the girls to get like FaceTime, one-on-one time or as close to one-on-one time as you're going to get with these professional athletes, these collegiate athletes.

Speaker 7:

We've had Olympians that are basically living out these girls' dreams and letting them know that. You know, I was a regular person too and I made it and so can you, and I think having it broken down in that tangible way is something that's really really good for those girls to like keep their sights set on where they want to go. But I also I think it's interesting, amy, that you brought up that that was exactly my thought. But at the through line, through all of you parents, as you share about your personal experiences, is that you needed to go deeper. So all of you like and that's typically how someone finds a program like this is you kind of are a fly on the wall for a bit. You see the podcast, you maybe see stuff pop up in your feed and whatever, and you know, maybe go through a challenge week and do these different things and in that way you're sampling. It's like you're watching someone give a hitting lesson to somebody else.

Speaker 7:

You know Like you're kind of seeing how that coach works, You're kind of seeing what they do in a hitting lesson, but like it's not the same thing as actually purchasing a hitting lesson and putting your daughter into that lesson, Right, and and I think that's that it's interesting that all of you parents saw that that as a need of like. Yeah, I've been on this fly on the wall. I've seen all this great content and we have tons of free stuff and it's great, really, really good stuff. To start with, it's really good to like you, to Amanda and our team and what we do and how we do it.

Speaker 7:

But really to reap those benefits, you got to jump in with both feet. You've got to be there. You've got to be in the room and taking your own personal. It's like you got to put them in the cage. You got to see what their swing's like. You got to see what they need to work on each individually. And that's what makes the individual program so powerful is because it's on an individual basis for the individual girl, and not just this is how this coaching instructor teaches this other girl how to hit. Like that's not really super helpful.

Speaker 2:

That's a really great point. I I honestly, I mean, I'm, I'm here for it all. So of course, I want all of your daughters to come into the program so I can coach them and, um, this would be a really juicy. I would love for you guys to be honest and put yourself back in January, february, march, whenever you signed up. What was your biggest like? Oh, I don't know, like, what was your biggest? Um, fear, worry, concern? And you're like, oh man, like am I really going to purchase? Like, what was your biggest fear, worry, concern? And you're like, oh man, like am I really going to purchase this?

Speaker 3:

What was the one thing, that kind of like, held you back as you were making that decision. I think for me it was a couple of things. One, just not knowing is this program going to be authentic? You know you're getting ready to pay, you know um, a large sum of money and you don't. I didn't really know anything other than the podcast or the recordings that I had heard.

Speaker 3:

And I felt like, in addition to that, in order for Andy to have buy-in to this, it was going to have to be authentic. And you know, I need, I felt like I needed to know that the person who was going to be, you know, working, working with Andy, cared, you know, and then you got on that one on one with me, spent 15 minutes, and I knew right away how passionate you were about this and about these kids and that, you know, this was more than just a job for you, you know, and that, right there, it made it easy. After talking with you, it really did. And initially Andy did, I think, was pretty skeptical, you know, because I let her quit. I was like, okay, you don't want to play, don't play. And I think she thought, well, this is a tactic Mom's trying to get me, you know, back into the sport, and so I think she did hit it with a bit of skepticism and then, as she went through the modules and was on the coaching calls, she really enjoyed it.

Speaker 2:

She did, and she looked forward to it and still does actually. Yeah, I think I, if I could go back to our 15 minute call together. It was like you had asked me for our coaching calls right now. The way that we have it structured is we coach every month, and I've been told that I'm crazy by my coaches and other people out there that are doing this. As far as I know, we're the only program that is offering lifetime access, so we're not an online portal where, like, oh you know, after three months or a year, like you lose access, like regardless. You get access to the Fearless Warrior Program materials for life. But the really cool thing is when I told you that coaching calls were for life as well. We have calls every single month for as long as Andy decides to play, and I remember you looked at me like wait, what did you just say? You're like why wouldn't I buy this?

Speaker 3:

Exactly, exactly. I really didn't even believe you.

Speaker 2:

I know it's hard to believe we are going to be changing the structure just because we want to bring on. You know, I want to bring coach Karen, coach Sarah is also, you know, certified in this and, um, we want to bring in more coaches and we want to do more with them. As far as mentorship calls, and so you guys are grandfathered in, you have lifetime access and anyone that's considering purchasing the program this is the last round that we're doing lifetime access. So I mean, I don't know if you can put a dollar amount on that. I don't even know how to.

Speaker 7:

You can't, because if you're buying this for your 10 year old daughter, she's not going to have the same mental struggles that she is when she's 16. Like it's just. There is absolutely no way the way to. Adolescent brain works and develops. Like it's going. It's going to continue to help at every single stage, every every single stage of her life, and she'll be able to come back to us. And it's beyond valuable and Amanda's crazy for offering it.

Speaker 2:

We're doing it. We're doing it. Let's just keep rolling on on. This question is like, um, you know, think about the parents that might be listening to this of like what you know. Put yourself back when you were making this decision, luanne can you remember I couldn't figure out how to unmute?

Speaker 4:

Um, yeah, obviously it is a lot of money. Um, I'm not, we can't brush by that, but it's about so much more than softball. Um, at any time like these girls are going to face tons of adversity from 10 until they're 90, um, and I, I want my daughter to feel like she has the skills to deal with that and push through and do the hard things, because I'm guilty myself as an adult of just not doing hard things Like I could do that. But I'll just, I'll step back Like somebody else can do it, like they can do it better. Um, but I want Harper to feel empowered, that if she wants to do it, she can and she, she doesn't need to let somebody else do it. Um, and so that was it's we're. We all came here for one reason because it's like we're seeing our girls struggle on the field. Um, but it's it's so much more than that, so that's all I got I love it.

Speaker 7:

That's everything, though. That's all that's it. That's like the tagline to me, like honest, like you hit it on the head. These are life skills. This is what they're going to use for their whole life and they can practice it in an arena where it does not matter if they fail, like the stakes are so low in this arena and this is their way that they can practice these life skills that when it does matter, when it really really like for their life, matters, that they can take those same skills and apply them in a way that's going to bless their lives forever and the lives of those around them honestly.

Speaker 4:

As people we have to be challenged to grow and if we don't know how to get through those challenges, then we don't put ourselves in those positions and I never want my daughter to feel like she can't be challenged to do what she wants to do.

Speaker 5:

So I'll have to say my biggest hesitation is my daughter had just turned nine. Like she was still young in the softball world. We played her up. She's always been the youngest on her team. She doesn't look like the youngest but she is. So when you don't look like the youngest but you are, those mental skills and development is just different. And that was my biggest hesitation. I'm like she's nine, does she need this yet? Is this going to be too much for her? And I don't know who responded. It was right after we had started the program.

Speaker 5:

I messaged, maybe through Facebook or Instagram, I don't even remember. But I said this is what she's thinking. And you guys replied. You said those are her thoughts, those are her feelings. And I was like, oh, that's right, I don't control those. There's not like a guideline of what she should be thinking or feeling to work her out of that.

Speaker 5:

And now, seeing that, and now her thoughts hurt and she says, oh, this is how I was feeling. It makes no sense to me sometimes at all. And I'm like, okay, well, what are we going to do to work through this? And so taking what she feels and working through it and seeing how that's changed has really just made her grow. And she's even told me after challenge week she wants to do the program again this summer and she wants to go through it. And I'm like, okay, well, let's do it. So, even if they are a little bit younger I've had some friends ask me, and their daughters are, you know, six, seven I said that's probably a little too young, but you never know. I mean, listen to a podcast with them, do the challenge week with them, see how they react, because every kid is different. And Chloe's even told me well, I wish I would have started this when I started playing softball.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, that's really powerful. We actually recommend that age nine is probably about the youngest. But what's really powerful is you were with her on the calls and that's what I want to point out is that if you would expect your daughter to learn how to pitch or to hit, we would never take an eight or a nine-year-old and say, here you go, here's the bucket of balls. Like you would work on the physical skills with her, and so mental skills are the same. We want you guys to be learning alongside her, be doing the worksheets with her, have those as conversations, which is really, really cool. And I'll also say some of my oldest clients are currently in college and I just did this on today's call.

Speaker 2:

I said, hey, you need to go back and do module nine. We got to talk about failure recovery. Um, you know, I've got girls that are going into post-season and again, they've been in the program for years. I think Chloe has been with me. Um, sorry, not your Chloe, Chloe's um, their season in college right now. And I'm saying, hey, go back to module five. Right, Like the same thing is going back to the basics for for physical skills. It's like, okay, well, how do you go back to the basics of mental skills, and so that's.

Speaker 7:

That's really cool that Chloe's seeing that well, yeah, and I also think, like, obviously there is too young, but the younger we start, the more we are treating this like preventative care as opposed to just like rehabbing a current issue. And I think I think to me, if I had the perfect world on a magic wand and I could wave it, I think this program or these skills would be taught to every girl in that nine, 10, 11 range 11, if he's been getting a little bit old. In the fact that at that point it really is preventative, it's a way more. They haven't gone through the changes yet that that change their, their, their brains literally change through adolescence and so they haven't gone through those shifts yet. They haven't set in some of those routines of negative self-talk and and those negative, those negative routines that we get into as we change and as we develop. And so if, if we could, you know, shift that forward just a little bit and allow them to learn these skills, I mean, in my day most girls have never, most athletes haven't been exposed to these until college.

Speaker 7:

If they were lucky, I didn't really get really officially exposed to it until I was working with, like, national team coaches. Like that's way too late, I was done with my athletic career at that point when I was really getting, like, overtly taught a lot of these things. And so the younger we can start, the more it's this preventative care that you're giving these girls these tools before they really need them, before it becomes really hard to get rid of those ingrained habits and things that they've set up for themselves. I think that's, I mean, there is too young, but I also think most people are starting way too late. Well, that's.

Speaker 2:

We teed this up perfectly for James. Uh, because Sophia is also really, really young and she's had some really cool breakthroughs. Can you talk about that?

Speaker 6:

Yeah, well, one of the things you teach is the POP method and that has been absolutely huge for her, not just in softball and schoolwork too. The other week she had a bad spelling test and then we just broke it down and kind of went through the POP method. You know, we know you've had good spelling tests before in the past. This is one test and it got her through feeling like she failed at school over one test. But like um on the mound and stuff, like when she's a pitcher, 10 year old pitcher she used to just have a complete breakdown, hit a batter or two or you know, have a long inning, few walks, and you could just see it in her face, um, like, let's say, I emailed you not too long ago when we had a tournament and I had to pull her because, you know, anyone's getting a little bit out of control and that would just totally devastate her, devastate her before. And then, going through her little pop method and everything, she took it like a champ and kept a positive attitude, positive mindset.

Speaker 2:

So good. Well, this is a great segue too, because my last question and I do want to be mindful of your time is you guys get to brag as parents. You get the full pass to brag what and again. Home runs and perfect games and great outings are amazing, but what are you most proud of after she's gone through the program? Like, what are those wins that you've seen, whether it's softball related or non softball related?

Speaker 3:

Like, what are you most excited about that you've seen in her Well, for me, the the biggest thing is she came to me on her own and said she was ready to play again. And as we went through this little exercise and I read through your questions I was looking at the timetable of that and, ironically enough, it was 12 weeks into the program. It was right when she got through that last module and we were actually in a tournament weekend. And she didn't play that Saturday, didn't go and came to me that Saturday night and said mom, I want to play softball again, I want to have fun with it again, I want to enjoy it again, I want to be out there with you and my teammates again. And she came back that next Sunday. And you know, of course, you know I didn't just like throw her into the games right away. So she just sat on the bench and enjoyed her team and enjoyed being out there again. And you know, I was kind of skeptical. But let me see, let me see how she does.

Speaker 3:

And she's put her heart and soul right back into it again. And I mean she still struggles. She had a rough past weekend and a real rough past weekend. But she has more emotional control now and she has more self-awareness around. You know what she's experiencing. I don't even think she realized. You know how much negativity and how much pressure and those thoughts in her head is how much she was doing that to herself. And she said from the weekend, you know, I realized I got, I got to quit putting so much pressure on myself, I've you know. So she's like she's noticing it now and that's the biggest thing, cause then now she needs, now we need to like okay, now you have your tools, now that you're noticing it, let's put them to work, let's keep practicing these things so that it becomes second nature and you can implement them in these times when you're starting to recognize that you're feeling this way. So yeah, she's playing again.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, but what a cool thing that you're pointing out to her is like, look how far you've come and you're recognizing and you have self-awareness and I say this all the time with my one-on-one clients this isn't me, andy, this is you know't me, andy, this is you know, like girl, this is you. You put in this work, you did the mental skills. I was just your guide and that's the coolest part is that just even boost their confidence even more, because they're ultimately they're the ones that have to do it. Which so cool.

Speaker 4:

I'm so glad you shared that yeah, I would say for Harper, my biggest um brag is we are um. The division she's playing in this year is a bit of a stretch for her Um. It's she's definitely being challenged Um and I think without the program it would be really easy for her to get down um on herself and probably want to quit Um. But she's pushing herself. She just keeps on trucking Um and we're making great progress and I can't I couldn't be more proud of that. I think I think we'll get out of this season and she'll still want to play Um and we've seen tons of huge, huge growth, both physically and mentally um in a time that it could be a deal breaker for a lot of girls. But we'll be on the right side at the end of the season. I love that.

Speaker 5:

So one of my favorite examples I love to give. It's kind of like a timeline. So we started the program in September, november and, as I mentioned before, she's on a second year team. She's a first year. There's a huge difference between first year and second year, especially in tenure.

Speaker 5:

So we get to the first of November. They put her in to pitch her first bracket game. She's told the night before that she's going to pitch a bracket game and she's in her head completely. What if I fail? What if I let my team down? I can't do this. We get through the next morning. She walks the first three and they pull her Understandably. We go a month later and she's upset. She's crying in the dugout. She's not consolable, she wants nothing to do with anybody. We go a month later. They put her in again to pitch a bracket game and she pitches the whole game. She only walked two and one got a hit off of her.

Speaker 5:

So then we keep working through the program. We finish it up in December. We come to February and they put her into pitch. She runs off the field. After that she says mom, my mental skills really work. I was like I wanted to say I told you so. But I was like, yes, I'm so, I told you so. But I was like, yes, I'm so glad, what did you use? And she told me she used pop and she used box breath. I was like, all right, let's keep going Like this is great. Um, and then we come to. Just even this past weekend she goes into pool pitches, three up, three down. One got a hit off of her. They got her out at first, like she's rocking it.

Speaker 5:

They put her put her in the pitch bracket. It's a tougher team and we knew that she walked too. And they pulled her. She was upset, there were some tears, but it wasn't inconsolable, it wasn't sobbing. So she pulled it together, got up, went to bat and I was like, oh my gosh, now they're going to put her up to bat and she's in her head. She hit fine, she got a single, everything was good.

Speaker 5:

Well, then they put her in to pitch the championship game, starting pitcher. And I'm like, oh my gosh, oh my gosh. And she went and she pitched the first two and a half innings until they started hitting off of her and then, when they pulled her, they're like, hey, you did great, but they're hitting off of you. Like we've got to change it up a bit. And she was like, okay, here you go, gave the other pitcher a high five and went and started cheering them on from the dugout, like, and just seeing that growth and hearing how she says what she uses when we're practicing pitching or hitting on our own, even just at home, outside of practice and lessons, she'll say them out loud. She's kinder, she's nicer about it and she's not so down on herself like through it all, Like there's just been an immense amount of growth in every area.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, and how full circle is that? From at the beginning of this interview tonight you noticed man, she's got this, isn't my Chloe, she's kind of got this toad going on and now you see her like owning it in that short amount of time is really cool, so cool. I can't wait until my youngest starts playing softball. She better play softball. James, do you want to wrap us up?

Speaker 6:

Yeah, my biggest, I guess, brag positive thing about this is just seeing how she bounces back a lot better now. I mean, we still have a lot to work to do. She's still going through the program with everything and but just the bounce back and when you see her going to her focal point and you can start, you know we're learning the program with her. You see the wheel start spinning inside her head and you can tell she's using what she's been learning. Just really cool.

Speaker 2:

So cool, um, that this is kind of a wrap. I could challenge you guys, if you could, to just put a nice, neat little bell. You know, um, I should recruit you guys instead of me doing discovery calls. You guys could take discovery calls. If you could give advice to a parent that might be considering this, could you give them just one sentence? What would you say to them? Or two sentences?

Speaker 3:

I would say that you know when, when you're struggling, it's it's a process, it's a journey. But once you have the tools, it's a journey. But once you have the tools it sure makes that journey a lot, a lot easier, more manageable and your chances of success, I believe, are a lot higher.

Speaker 4:

I would say, if, if you see that you think she needs it on the softball field, I can promise you that she needs it at school and she needs it in life, and so recognize that she needs it, even in times that you don't see, because life is tough for preteen and teenage girls.

Speaker 5:

Agreed. Say you're going to spend the money on hitting lessons, pitching lessons. If she's a pitcher, you're going to spend the time getting her to and from those lessons and practices and games and tournaments. This to me, is equally as important, if not more. I would say this is not just investing in her now, or even in just her entire softball career. This is investing in her life.

Speaker 6:

I'd say it's definitely worth checking out for sure. It's been a very fun program and we're seeing on the kind of coaching calls we can see all these girls and you can tell every single one of these girls on these coaching calls are growing and it's just, it's a very good program.

Speaker 2:

every single one of these girls on these coaching calls are growing and it's just. It's a very good program and we do have literally tomorrow I hope you guys got the email notification during the summer. What are you guys doing on the weekends? We're all playing softball. So warrior calls are officially switched to wednesday evenings. Um, just a quick note for all of you guys is um, we have a very special zoom link. We're actually going to be inviting other people who are considering the program to join tomorrow's warrior call, which will be really cool. It might be a little chaotic, but we're going to roll with it because you guys echoed it. It's like sometimes you just have to experience it. So tomorrow is our first Wednesday warrior call, and then all of our warrior calls after that will be on every other Wednesday night until we get back to school in August. So that's a wrap. Thank you guys all for being here tonight.

Speaker 1:

And we'll see you guys on warrior call.

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Amanda Schaefer

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