The Fearless Warrior Podcast

090: Leadership Isn't About Being Perfect with Riley Sartain-Vaughan

• Amanda Schaefer

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This week's episode takes you back to one of our mentorship calls from 2021 featuring Riley Sartain-Vaughan. She answers questions from our Fearless Warriors about Leadership and how she used mental skills during her time at Texas A&M and in the pros with This is Us Softball. 

Episode Highlights:

• Succeeded through relentless effort and self-awareness
• Understanding your own unique strengths is crucial
• Intangibles that require zero talent: attitude, effort, and accountability
• Consistent daily actions that build trust and establish leadership credibility

Connect with Riley:

Instagram: @rileysartain


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Speaker 1:

Welcome to the fearless warrior podcast, a place for athletes, coaches and parents who know the value of a strong mindset. I'm your host, coach AB, a mental performance coach on a mission, former softball coach, wife and mom of three. Each episode, we will dive deep into all things mental performance, mindset tools and how to rewire the brain for success. So if your goal is to gain the mental edge and learn the secrets of mental performance, mindset tools and how to rewire the brain for success, so if your goal is to gain the mental edge and learn the secrets of mental performance, you're in the right place. Let's tune in to today's episode.

Speaker 2:

Hey guys, how's everybody doing Good? Give me thumbs up. How's everybody doing Good? Give me thumbs up. Very cool, good to see you guys on a Saturday night. This is Riley Vaughn Riley Sarton Vaughn, but now she plays professionally with. This Is Us Softball. So I know that you guys. Riley was a solo senior at Texas and I know you guys have lots of leadership questions that you guys always bring to the call. So make sure you bring them. I know she's ready and eager to answer them. So, riley, I'll turn it over to you.

Speaker 3:

Sure. So, like you said, my name is Riley. You can call me Sardin or Vaughn. Really, either one works.

Speaker 3:

I'm based out of Fort Worth, texas, so it's near Dallas, if you guys know where that is. I'm pretty much born and raised here. I grew up going to a private school. Most of my life went to a public school my last two years and we won two state championships at Aledo High School. There's a little like documentary callededo high school. Um, there was a little like documentary called titled town. We're like a tiny little town that won all these state championships. It's really cool If you have time to watch it.

Speaker 3:

Um went to Texas A&M, played there at third base my first three years and then shortstop my senior year. I was the only senior my senior year and we'll kind of get to that here in this call at some point. Kind of how that transpired and then kind of how I dealt with it. I had no intentions of playing professional softball but I got drafted by a team called the Mankato Peppers in like the legitimate NPF draft, which is like it used to be, I guess, like the big professional softball league. And then I got another offer from Scrapyard Dogs out of Houston, ended up taking the Scrapyard offer for a couple of reasons. I'll also tell you guys about that later. And then now I play for a team called this Is Us and hopefully will also play in Chicago with Athletes Unlimited this summer. So I thought I would just kind of share with you guys my story, just how my softball journey has gone about these past couple of years. I've been playing softball for I want to say, 18 years now, so quite a while.

Speaker 3:

I first got into softball when I was really little, I was six, and I always tell my lessons. I give lessons at a DBAT. I could tell my lessons all the time. I'm like look, I was a gymnast. I had no intentions of playing any other sport ever in my whole life. And my parents were like you know, riley, you have to do something besides gymnastics. And I said we signed you up for softball with one of your best friends and I was in tears. I was like no, I don't want to play softball. And then I played and never stopped. So um, really kind of fell into this by chance just because my parents wanted to sign me up.

Speaker 3:

And I actually grew up in Houston, texas, if y'all know where that is and in Houston league softball. So like rec softball was really big and I played. One of my very first teams I played on was with the Emanuel sisters, courtney and Sydney. They played at Georgia and they were my very first team. So rec softball was huge in Houston. It was super competitive.

Speaker 3:

Select softball hadn't really taken um form in Texas yet, I guess. And so, uh, when I moved to Fort Worth when I was little, we moved from my dad's job, we played rec and it was like the most, like least competitive thing here in Fort Worth. For whatever reason and it's still, it's still somewhat is. And so I started playing select. And you know when you start playing select how it just kind of like takes over your whole life. You know your every other weekend you're at tournaments, your you know lessons twice a week, speed and agility, all that kind of stuff. So, and especially when you know I was growing up and going through the recruiting process, you started recruiting for colleges when you were like 12. And so it started from a super, super young age and I kind of, you know, found my way through a few different teams here in the Fort Worth area Dallas, fort Worth area ended up on a team called team is. Do know, played with them through 14, you, 16, you and 18, you, and then my last year played for a team called impact gold. So some pretty just, I guess, well-known teams here in Texas if you're from here, somewhat internationally, somewhat nationally if you play in those national tournaments. But you know, growing up, softball was it, softball was it. That was all I did. That's what I eat, sleep, breathe, softball, you know, repeat in school too. But if there's anything I could like advice I could give to you guys, it would just be to play sports, other sports, for as long as you can. I specialize in softball really, really early, and I was very lucky I had no overuse injuries when I was young. But I see a lot of kids these days with tons of just overuse issues in their rotator cuff and then their knees and their hips and stuff like that. So play as many sports as you can for as long as you can. I've always been a huge advocate for multi-sport athletes, something I never did just because of circumstances and recruiting, and something that I hope you guys have the opportunity to do now that recruiting roles have changed.

Speaker 3:

Went to Texas A&M my freshman year. I was in a very good freshman class. So just some names out there. Out there, if you guys know them, I was with a girl named Samantha Show, who ended up playing for OSU and became famous for her bat flips, keely Milligan, who ended up playing at University of Louisiana Lafayette, and then Caitlin Alderink, also who's playing at Louisiana Lafayette as we speak. Actually they're playing up here at UT Arlington.

Speaker 3:

I was in a super competitive freshman class and something about me I've never been just growing up and playing softball. I've never been the biggest or the fastest or the strongest on any of my teams. Like, if you look at me on the field, I'm very unassuming. I'm about 5'3. I one 50 ish. Give or take what I eat on that day. Um, I'm not fast, like I'm. I'm really not fast at all. I could probably kid you, cause my build looks like I'm fast, not fast, Um.

Speaker 3:

But what's gotten me through all of these? Um, you know checkpoints in my career. You know playing, starting in college, going to the women's college world series, being an all American, all that kind of stuff is just the fact that I knew what I was good at, um, and so some other advice I would love to give to you guys is, just know what you bring to your team. Um, I was, you know, three, four hole hitter. Again, like I said, I'm not going to hit lots of home runs. I'm not super strong. I'm not going to bunt and get on base. I'm not super fast. My job was just to get base hits. And, you know, move runners be strategic with my sacrifice, bunt, sack flies, that kind of stuff.

Speaker 3:

And so what got me through is, you know, hard work, grinding it out, outworking every other person on my team and my opponents on the other team, knowing what I was good at and what I brought to the table and making sure that I was an expert in that field. I wasn't trying to be somebody else. I wasn't trying to go up there and be a Valerie Arriota she plays for Tim USA hit lots of home runs. That's not my game. And I realized that the second that I stepped out of what my game was, I began to perform less well. So reminded me all the time to stick to your game. Stick to your game and then, you know, just be the best teammate you can be.

Speaker 3:

And those things are what got me to the levels of softball I've been playing, where, if you looked at my stats or if you looked at, you know, my height, weight, all that kind of stuff, my throwing velocity, if you look at that on a piece of paper, you'd be like this girl does not belong on the field. Like I played over the summer with this as a softball and half of that team is team USA playing with Monica and Kat, and like all these girls that I grew up just admiring so much and I, looking at my numbers, I never belonged on that field, ever. But the way that I played in, the way that I was taught to play, and that's just the relentless effort and energy and, you know, willing to do whatever it takes to make my team win, that's what has put me on the field on those kinds of teams, um, and that's what put me on the field of Texas A&M. I did not. If you look at my stats at A&M, I think I hit my career batting average. I feel familiar with like what's good batting average or what's not. My career batting average is like 280 285, where you know usually you would see a player who's playing pro or you know, basically playing with team usa. You'd be like, oh my gosh, I bet you know she hits 350 every year and she has 10 home runs. That was not the case. A and then, um, you know it's. It's the intangibles, the thing that you can't see, but you can feel it. Those are the things you can bring to a team that requires zero talent, zero talent at all. It's just the way that you make the teammates to your left and your right better, the way you hold each other accountable and the way that you do the right thing. 100% of the time it's going to put you on the field, maybe when your numbers don't say that you belong there. And that's what got me through Texas A&M in a lot of ways.

Speaker 3:

I my freshman year. I got there and I was behind the third baseman, who was an all-american her name is Tori Vidala. She plays for Team Mexico and I was like, man, this is going to be tough to break into the lineup. I really just played third and short. I was open to playing other positions, but I talked to coach Evans, who's the head coach down there, and I was like look, I will. I want to play and I will play catch, I will catch if you need me to. Never caught my life. It's like I will catch if you need me to, I just want to get onto this field. And then breaking my way in at third base and they moved Tori over to first base Cause it was just a better situation for our team. And then from then on, like I really felt like I I belonged. Before then I was kind of like man maybe, like, maybe I'm not going to start, maybe, you know, I don't really know. This is, college is so different and it's so scary sometimes, and so just busting into that lineup, just you know, boosted my confidence in a lot of ways and helped me realize that, you know, I did belong there. And even if my stats didn't show it, I brought other things to the table that you know proved that I was a force to be reckoned with in the field.

Speaker 3:

Now, as my career evolved at Texas A&M, my sophomore year, I was an All-American. We went to the College World Series that year, really really, really awesome year for me and for my team, one of the best years of softball I think I've personally played as, and also just great team chemistry we had on that team. Um, and then my junior year, we took a nose dive. Uh, team chemistry went in the toilet. We had a a lot of you know caddy drama stuff going on on a team that affected the way we played in the field and it was so sad to see a team who showed some we didn't. We graduated two seniors my sophomore year, the year we went to the world series two seniors Um, neither of those seniors really were in the starting lineup. They were big know leaders on our team but they weren't in the starting lineup. We lost no starters and everybody gained a year of experience. The next year we almost we almost made it to the world series, shockingly enough. But if you would have been on that team, it was a complete 180 from the year before. Just you know, I can't even explain it. I'm sure you guys have experienced that at some point with just girls who are mean or you know a dynamic that does not work and that's what we experienced.

Speaker 3:

Then fast forward to my senior year and three of my teammates I've been playing with and I've known since I was 12 decide to transfer and it was one of the most devastating things ever because they're really like your sisters and even though you don't always get along, it's like these girls are your sisters and all of a sudden I was alone and we had eight freshmen, nine sophomores and four juniors. And now, all of a sudden, I'm like supposed to be the person in charge and for me, I, I have always been a lead by example type of player. I've never really been a vocal leader, but I was forced to be my senior year. I was absolutely forced to be and it was one of the most terrifying things I've ever had to do. I just felt like I I was going to say the wrong thing and I did in a lot, of, a lot of times.

Speaker 3:

Um, but all those things helped me to grow and when I look back at it, um, you know, know, my senior year, we almost didn't make a regional tournament. We almost didn't make postseason which for A&M um, just our history in softball, that's almost unheard of um, because we've had we've had a very strong history in softball. We've almost always made NCAA tournament at some point and I almost felt responsible. I was like you know, we were a young team. There's just a lot of different, a lot of different dynamics that were going on. Um, you know, I tore my meniscus and I had to have surgery after the year was over. There was just so many things on off the field that were going on, that were extremely tough, and every day I was like man, I really wish this could be different, like I really wish this wasn't happening to me right now.

Speaker 3:

Um, but when I look back on it, that was probably one of my most pivotal years in my performance as a player and now as a coach, because now I know what it feels like to face just unimaginable adversity, adversity, adversity you never thought you would ever face, and I know how to conquer it now. And so the moments where I felt my weakest whether it was playing wise on the field, what I was actually contributing, or the moments where I felt the weakest as a leader like I felt like I just couldn't do anything right those are actually the moments that built me into the leader I am today. And so you know this game softball is a crazy game and it will take you to some, some lows. It'll take you to some, to moments where maybe you don't feel confident in yourself because of your performance in the field, or maybe your teammates will make you feel a certain way, or maybe they'll hold you accountable and you've never had to be held accountable before but if you work hard and if you put your blood, sweat and tears into this game, it will never fail you ever. It really won't, whether it's the lessons you learn from it or the you know oh for four games where you strike out four times in a row, that'll eventually turn into four for four games with, you know, three triples in a home run.

Speaker 3:

This game will always pay you back, as long as you're putting in the work and obviously there's a caveat to that as long as you're putting in the work, and there's no guarantee that if you go out tonight and hit a hundred balls into the net, you're going to go four for four tomorrow, but it's possible.

Speaker 3:

And that hard work that you put in tonight will, over time, build and build and build and build and then eventually you'll find yourself in the college world series wondering like Whoa, how did I even get here? This is insane. And it's all those, all those nights, late nights of hard work, all of the you know doing one more rep, when, when nobody's watching and you really don't want to it's picking the ball up in the center field that nobody in their team wants to pick up, but you're going to go out there and do it. It's all those tiny moments, that kind of build up, and you don't even realize it until after it's over and you're like well, that was, that was insane. So I mean, softball has taken me some crazy places and it's definitely shaped me as a person I am today and I'm super proud of that. So, um, if y'all have any questions, I would love to answer all of them.

Speaker 4:

Go ahead um, what was the best thing that you think? You said that um like to your team.

Speaker 3:

Good question. So I think one of the hardest things to do in a group of your peers and a group of people who are as old as you are, maybe even older than you, is to hold each other accountable. Um, what that means is if you see somebody you know not doing as best as they could whether it's they're not giving the effort they could, or, you know, maybe their shirts untucked, when the rules on the team are to tuck your shirt in, or, you know, whatever it is whenever somebody is falling short of the expectations that have been set for your team, telling them that is extremely difficult and telling them that in a way that doesn't make them upset or that doesn't make them feel like you're attacking them, is very difficult, and so one of the greatest lines I ever learned was saying hey, we're better than that, and that kind of covers everything, because it's not calling them out as a person Like so say, ashlyn, say that the rules on our team is that your shirt is supposed to be tucked in. At practice and I see your shirt is is not tucked in, and you know it's not tucked in, like it's not going to accident. I, you know that it's not tucked in I would say Ashton, come on, tuck your shirt in.

Speaker 3:

And then you know, if you got upset with me, if you got upset and were mad that I called you out, maybe you're a little bit embarrassed because you know some other people heard it and you don't like being the center of attention. Um, and you were upset with me. I would say, hey, you know, we're better than that, come on. Come on and hopefully, if you're in the right head space, you'd be like okay, was that fun for her to hold me accountable? No, no one likes to be held accountable. Nobody likes to be told that they're not doing something right or not doing it to the best of their ability. But it's a reminder, like, yeah, I am better than that. So you're telling them, hey, we could do this better, and you're reminding them that they are better, that they are that person that is better, and so it kind of inspires them to be a better version of themselves too. So, hey, we're better than that best line in the world. Thank you, of course.

Speaker 5:

When you guys had your year where you guys just kind of tanked at Texas A&M with your team dynamic like that next year as this only senior, how did you, I guess, try to fix that? Or what did you do to try to fix your team dynamic?

Speaker 3:

Good question. So I would say the reason our team dynamic took a nosedive in the first place was because there were a lot of just like pent-up feelings towards each other. You know, it's kind of like where when you're with somebody like say, you have a best friend and like you love them to death, but sometimes they do something that's like just totally annoying and you don't say anything about it and then over time it just builds and builds and builds until you just explode on each other and then you fight and then you make up and whatever. We never had those um like diffusing moments. We never had those moments where we were just able to like go to each other and say, hey look, this is what I'm feeling right now and I don't think it's good for our team and I think we should probably resolve this conflict that we have. So a lot of just unresolved conflict that kind of went, it's kind of just slipped under the rug, like, oh, we'll be better. Kind of went. It's kind of just slipped under the rug, like, oh, we'll be better, it'll be okay, like it's not going to affect us.

Speaker 3:

But over the course of a you know, four months season, it always, always, always comes up, and it's usually in the most important moments, it's in those moments where your team really has to band together, that the the annoyances seem to be the worst. And so what we started doing and this was just something that we did together every week or so, we would go to each other and we would, you know, draw names out of a hat and you would tell the person that you drew. You would tell them two things. We call it the sandwich. You would tell them two things they do that are really good for the team, and then one thing that they do that doesn't help the team, whether it's, uh, you know, the way they talk to another teammate, or it's the way that you, you feel like maybe they're not working hard as they could, or their attitude after they strike out, whatever it is. Um, you would always say the good, one good thing first, the thing they could do better in the middle and then the one thing good at the end.

Speaker 3:

And while I fell short as a leader in a lot of ways that year, you know those were some tools I was able to give the underclassmen that hopefully, now their team culture at Texas A&M is better because of the skills we learned Whenever I was there. It's not always an easy fix and sometimes it takes a couple of years of just teaching the people underneath you. Maybe it's not like for me. When I left, our team culture wasn't great. It wasn't perfect, it wasn't what I wanted it to be, but I think that just going through that, we gave everybody the ability to work through those things, and now I've heard from my friends that are still there that the team culture is great and that they, they all love playing together and that everything is pretty good. Thank you.

Speaker 2:

Of course Good questions, guys. Good, thank you. Of course. Good questions, guys. Really awesome questions. What else you got? You know that coach becca has questions, but I'm I'm gonna hold off because I know you guys have wheels turning.

Speaker 4:

Go ahead, ash what you got so when you said that, um, when, like, you injured yourself one time, do you um, do you know if that was like a good like? Do you know if, like, your team looked like successful or um, it was like?

Speaker 3:

so I uh, I tore my meniscus about halfway through the season and I didn't know it, like I never got it looked at because it hurt, but I was like I could still play and my trainer's like you're not damaging anything. Right now everything feels okay. Um, and personally, my performance as I was the three-hole hitter and I played short my performance totally tanked. Um, I didn't know what I was doing wrong and it wasn't until after I graduated that I realized my mechanics had totally changed because my knee was so weak and I just I didn't notice, like I, it just happened so gradually over time I did end up getting moved to the end of the lineup and that's one of those moments where it's just like dang, like I should be the person that's, like you know, leading the team in batting average and home runs, and while I still I was still hitting like two, 90 or something like that and I still had 10 or so home runs, the underclassmen actually did a phenomenal job of picking me up.

Speaker 3:

Um, when I was down and when I wasn't being successful, they had my back and they would get the base hit that I couldn't. They would, um, you know, execute the hit and run that I couldn't and they would make the plays that I couldn't. So I was definitely blessed to have some really talented underclassmen you know freshmen and sophomores and juniors to come have my back when I couldn't have my own. So hope that answers your question.

Speaker 4:

Yeah, it does. And also, when did you graduate college?

Speaker 3:

I graduated in 2019. So two years ago, two seasons removed, oh was it hard balancing school and softball.

Speaker 3:

Yes, okay. So one important thing that you know this is something that I did a little bit by myself my parents really drilled into my head was that school always came first, and you know my routine when I was 13, 12, 13, 14, like my daily schedule was go to school, come home, snack, obviously, do homework, finish, finish homework and then softball would come after. So I mean, sometimes I was in our garage, you know, throwing a tennis ball against the wall at nine at night and that was the only work I could get done, just because school always, always, always took over, and I've always been very proud of my academic achievements At my high school I was third in my class, my private school, and then at A&M I was a distinguished honor graduate. So school was always something that was very, very important to me, and it's really just about balancing time, like your, your priorities. If your priorities are straight, you'll devote the necessary amount of time to the things that are your priorities. Now, I understand that it's hard for you guys. Social media was becoming big when I was going through middle school, but it definitely wasn't as big as it is now, and so I know that it's difficult. I have a 15 year old brother. So I know that it's difficult for you guys to like put the phone down, you know, and like put the TikTok down, put the Instagram down, put whatever it is down, and like do your homework, do your workout, your training, whatever it is that you need, make sure you're eating good food and then get enough sleep. So it's hard, yes, if your priorities are the way they should be, which is also hard it kind of takes care of itself. Um, I think it's.

Speaker 3:

I think it's great to have a schedule. So, like a planner I have a planner, even now. I have a planner uh, just to kind of like map out how I want my day to look, and it's. It can it can sound time consuming, but just five minutes in the morning. Make a little checklist, like, okay, I have to do this today.

Speaker 3:

I have, you know, school, I have a test tomorrow that I have to study for. I have to get, you know, 15 minutes of speed and agility in 15 minutes of glove work in and then go hit for 30 minutes, and so have a checklist where you can actually see, like if you're doing what you said you wanted to do that day and wanted to do that day and then maybe, if there's a day where you feel like you didn't have time to get all of it in, you can check and be like was there not enough time because I was on TikTok or was there not enough time because there's just not enough hours in the day sometime to get things done. So it's something that can kind of help you. Just plan everything out is really really good for you too. Good question.

Speaker 5:

When you made your decision with Texas A&M and I don't know if you toured there or not, but like, what was your deciding factor? Like did you just kind of have like an aha moment, like like this is my school that's a good question too.

Speaker 3:

So my parents both went to Texas A&M. They met there and growing up, I've always been a die-hard Aggie. My grandma lives in College Station, which is where A&M is. That was always my first choice when I was getting recruited. Like I said, this happened when we were like 12 and 13 years old, but I was getting recruited, my top three choices and the schools that I absolutely loved were Texas A&M, university of Washington, stanford and Missouri. So top four schools that I just absolutely loved, loved the coaching staff, staffs, loved the program.

Speaker 3:

But my mom asked me um, you know, obviously at the time I was going into oil and gas. My grandpa runs an oil and gas company, so that was kind of me grooming myself to take over the family business. Um, so I was going in for a geophysics, which is, um, a very niche major it's not big everywhere and so, uh, obviously that played a role in like kind of where I wanted to go to school also. Um, but my mom told me. She said, if you went to whatever school you're about to pick and you got injured on the very first day of practice and were told you could never play softball again, would you be happy with your choice.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, and for me, like I was, my heart was really taking me to Washington because I love coach tar and I love obviously the uniforms are awesome and they're so good at softball. But I was like I don't know if that's it's, it's far from home. I just don't know if, if I got hurt, that I would necessarily be my happiest there. A&m was definitely hands down the the choice for me, even though for a couple of years there I man, I'm really gonna go be a husky, that's what I'm gonna go do. But yeah, it was where do you want to go? And it could also be worded as where do you want to go and sit the bench, like, where do you want to go and not play at all and still, you know, feel like you made the right choice what you got, kaylani.

Speaker 2:

I saw your hand go up. What?

Speaker 6:

is it like to play for? This is us, and do you have any other jobs besides it?

Speaker 3:

that's a good question, um, it's awesome. So we started I'm not sure if y'all are privy to all the information that happened, but, um, we played for scrapyard dogs, which is a very prominent professional softball team. It's been around for several years. Um, there was a tweet sent out by somebody in upper management. It was super insensitive to the issues that were going on at the time and so as a team we decided to step away from that organization and we started a new organization called this Is Us Softball and really our mission was to make softball feel like it was a place that welcomed everybody and you don't have to fill whatever square to come play softball. Like we will welcome you and love you, um, and make you feel like you belong, no matter what. So that was kind of our mission and it was incredible not only to be a part of that kind of culture and that kind of just moment in softball history, but also to play with like I cannot explain to you guys how much I've looked up to Kat Osterman and Monica Abbott like my whole life. Our very first day of practice I was like starstruck and I don't even think I said a word to them because I was just terrified because I mean, they're like, they're two-time Olympian gold medalists, like some of the the best softball players to ever play the game, and I was playing behind them. Oh, it was so cool and it's something I will cherish for forever and it was absolutely awesome.

Speaker 3:

Um, I do have other jobs, so I do still work for my grandpa. I ended up not majoring in geophysics, I majored in strength and conditioning, um, just some interesting things that led me to that choice. But I still work for him, uh, for his uh oil oil company, as he does some of the stuff that he's doing. I give lessons. My parents own a DBAT facility.

Speaker 3:

I don't know if you guys have those where you are, um, but it's basically just a hitting facility and there's a bunch of them around here kind of sprinkled throughout um, southeast, southeast US, um, some in Arizona and California, but we have lessons there. And then I also have an online player development platform. Just basically a ton of drills, tons of courses for girls who want some guidance and some training and stuff like that. Let's see what else do I do, my husband and I. My husband plays professional baseball. He is currently playing with an independent team here in the DFW area and we do softball clinics. He loves to coach softball, so we do like mini softball clinics with teams that come around here and it's really, really fun. That's probably our favorite thing to do.

Speaker 2:

That's such cool stuff. I did not know all that. That's awesome.

Speaker 3:

Awesome questions Make ends meet, you know yeah.

Speaker 2:

And Riley, your brother.

Speaker 3:

I've seen like some of your Instagram videos too, like he'll like pitch to you and stuff like that, right, yes, oh my gosh. So I don't know if you guys saw this on social media, but my husband and I uh bat flipped each other over quarantine. You know, I would go to him, he'd hit it in a home run, whatever bat flipping and then I, he would go to me and I would bat flip him. Um, my brother though not videoed really a whole lot is probably one of the best underhand pitchers with the little foam ball I've ever faced. He's been pitching since he was, like you know, one week old. He's been doing this for forever and, uh, he's amazing. He plays baseball and he's really good at baseball. But underhand pitching guys, he is so good it's insane.

Speaker 2:

Oh my gosh, that's amazing, especially with like what'd you say with the little foam balls.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, so it's like Juggs makes these like little light flight balls. Yeah, you know like whenever we were growing up, it was like you go to warmups for your game, your coach brought the light flight machine and you put the ball, Yep, and you hit with a stick. You know all that kind of stuff. It's those, the squishy balls.

Speaker 2:

So yeah, Like so hard to throw in general, let alone be awesome at it.

Speaker 3:

Yes, he's so good. He's awesome. His name is Brooke Sarton, if you want to give him a follow on social media.

Speaker 2:

Give Riley a follow too. We'll have Riley. Can you drop your Instagram stuff in the chat? Absolutely Cause. Just follow Riley because she's awesome, but also she has so many cool drills and stuff that she she does on social media too.

Speaker 3:

So I sent my personal one and then my player development one which is more like softball oriented.

Speaker 2:

Perfect, awesome, thank you. Development one which is more like softball oriented perfect, awesome, thank you, of course. Good questions, guys. Um, anybody else have any more questions?

Speaker 6:

anything, I have a quick question um, if you I know you said that like your senior year, you peaked on your like leadership if you would like go back on your like younger, like freshman year, do you think you'd be like go forward and try to lead a little bit more in your own way and more encouragement?

Speaker 3:

Definitely that's a good question. I think you know I always just kind of sat in this I'll just lead by example kind of category. I was like this is kind of what fits for me, this is in my comfort zone, I feel good doing this and I'm really Um. But looking back on what I know now, there were so many moments like, like I told you so I would say, everyone transferring and leaving me alone.

Speaker 3:

My senior year was kind of like the bubbling over of all the stuff that had been going on for several years. I feel like there were so many moments for me in between to kind of maybe not change the outcome of everything, but definitely steer in a different direction. And I know that I was kind of quiet, um, like I had my, my one or two really good friends on the team, but other than that, like I would talk to everybody and I was really friendly, but I would, I wouldn't ever um, hold them accountable. For instance, I wouldn't ever say those things. I didn't want them to be mad at me and I never understood that. Like I would be more mad at somebody for not holding me accountable and it leading me down a path of self-destruction or a path that made my team lose. And so I just didn't have that perspective yet and I just didn't understand how important it was to not only lead by example, but lead with your, your words and the things that you had to say.

Speaker 3:

And I've always been you know, I'm a I'm a Christian. I've always been a huge believer in being a servant leader. So like serving the people that you want to lead, um, in a way that you know, you know, can I take you to this class, to the freshmen who didn't have cars? Or like, what can I do for you? Um, kind of bring you food or you know that kind of stuff. And then also picking up the slack when, when they needed it and whenever they needed some help.

Speaker 3:

And I just wish I would have done that a little bit more and maybe been a little bit more intentional with it, instead of just being like, yeah, well, I'm just comfortable here, leading by example and doing the right thing. It was good, it was. It was good because it kind of set a standard, but I never helped anybody who was struggling lift themselves up to that standard. I never gave them the encouragement or like the hey, we're better than that kind of mentality, um, until I was a junior and a senior and even then I failed miserably at it sometimes.

Speaker 3:

But that's kind of what it takes to kind of figure it out and figure out how to relate to people and make things work um, if you would have like one thing that'd be really good for, like, I'm a freshman on my team and I go to a?

Speaker 6:

um small Christianian school and, um, we, we are allowed for high school to have our some junior high on our team, but we also have older classmen and I don't like being like to hold you accountable. I'm more of like I'll pump you up from like encouragement. What would be one thing that you would say would be the best way to lead?

Speaker 3:

Good question. So, number one if at any point you want to be a vocal leader, you have to lead by example first. So we'll go back to Ashley, my example with you and the t-shirt or the shirt not being tucked in just everybody's familiar with that. If I was telling you to tuck your t-shirt in but I had my t-shirt untucked, no one would listen to me, and so it's kind of setting sort of a reputation of okay, hey, I'm here, I do the right thing, I'm diligent in my effort, I'm here for the team, being a servant leader in lots of ways, like asking what people need, especially people that are younger than you, like I know there's like this big stigma to, like you know, seniority I'm a C, I'm a whatever. I'm older than you. I get to do this first. Like kind of reverse that and let the underclassmen do things first. Don't always make them period equipment. Help them, you know, whenever you can, um, and kind of show that, like show who you are, cause I'm all of you guys are here doing this right now. So I'm assuming all of you have a great moral character and are just really good people to be on your really good teammates and your teammates are probably really appreciative of you, um, but just show them that and show them that every day, not, you know, not when it's convenient, but every single day. We call it character reps, doing character reps and reminding people like, hey, I'm here for you, I'm here for this team and I'm willing to do whatever it takes to make our team and our situation successful on and off the field. And then, after you've set that reputation for yourself, after you set that, like, this is who I am and you're, you're steady, you're consistent, then when people fall short of whatever you know, whatever expectations that your program or your team or your friends, whoever it is, whatever expectations they'll have set, when people start to fall short of that, you can always remind them how good they are. There's a, there's a sophomore.

Speaker 3:

When I was a senior and she was still one of my really good friends and I'll never forget I was feeling very, very inadequate as a leader. I had said some things to some people who it wasn't. I didn't say it the right way, it wasn't taken the right way. It was just not a good conversation. Nothing really got done and I remember like I was super in the dumps about it and it was to the point where it was like visible in my body language, in my face, and I was just very disappointed in myself.

Speaker 3:

And she came up to me and was like just pump me up. And she was like, don't you know that you're one of the best leaders I've ever known and you're one of the most steady like people on this team. And she, just, she just gave me so much encouragement and it wasn't in a way that made me feel like I was more inadequate, because I already was. I was already being hard on myself, and so she, she really made a turnaround for me in a lot of ways and, you know, kept me going in a time where I felt like I just wasn't doing the right thing and I couldn't, I couldn't steer this team in the right direction.

Speaker 3:

So there's always a role for you to answer your long story short, answer your question. There's always a role for you in some way and it's just about finding that way that's going to help the people to your left and your right the most. And it might not always be saying, hey, your shirt's not tucked in. It might just be, you know, pumping her up and like, hey, love you Great, play your shirts on tuck, let's fix that. You know something different, something that always um from an authoritative point of view. It can be from a friend point of view too.

Speaker 2:

I love that Awesome question, jj, and I love that. That. The idea, too, of, like you said, riley, the character reps that are so important and don't get talked about a lot.

Speaker 3:

Never, never, until now.

Speaker 2:

Never, we're changing that. Awesome stuff, Good questions. Thank you so much for being with us. Um, I will. What do you guys think? Anybody have one more juicy question before we close out? No, everybody's good. Ashlyn, are you raising your hand? You got one more yes, okay.

Speaker 4:

So, um, I know that sis baits is on the. You said the only in washington like the university of washington gave you like a college offer right. So I mean, because I'm a shortstop, I I like Sis Bates Because she is too, I do too. If you would have known, like in hindsight, if Sis Bates was like a really good shortstop, would you still have gone to the college you're at right now, or?

Speaker 3:

know where you were at. Yes, so you're saying like if there was somebody in front of me that was really that good, would I still have gone there? Is that kind of what you're asking? Yes, that's a really good question. So I think it's important to understand what your priorities are too.

Speaker 3:

So for me, um, in my head, like I was determined to break into any lineup, any, any team that I picked, I was determined to break into any lineup, any, any team that I picked. I was determined to break into that lineup somewhere, whether it was playing short, or it was playing third or second or first or, you know, dp, whatever it was. I knew that, um, I was going to work my booty off until I got a shot, until I got my chance to be somewhere on that team, even if it wasn't at the position that I wanted to play. Now, everybody's different. Maybe. Maybe for you, you really want to play every single game and at some schools, just because of the way that they've done their recruiting and the people that they have in place, you know, perfect example I probably wouldn't have played shortstop if I had I gone to UW. I might've played third or second, but I probably wouldn't have played shortstops. This is really really, really good and she has a really good bat.

Speaker 3:

So, um, I guess, just knowing, uh, for me I still would have gone to A&M. Uh, just because of the other reasons that I said earlier, just because that's where I wanted to go and and um, get my degree from. That's the one at the school I wanted to graduate from and get this from. So, um, but I think if you're ever in that situation where it's like, yeah, I might go, but there's somebody really good that's already there, they're coming up behind me. Just know what, what it is that you want out of your college experience and knowing, do I want to play every game, or am I okay playing somewhere else? Or am I okay not playing at all and just being a part of the team, or and kind of, let that navigate. Help you navigate your way through some of those decisions.

Speaker 2:

Help you navigate your way through some of those decisions. Awesome, um, so we will. We will wrap it up this is awesome Girls, awesome questions. So glad to have you guys on a Saturday night. Riley, thank you again.

Speaker 3:

Of course, thanks for having me.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, all right With that. Guys have a good Saturday night. Have a good rest of your weekend.

Speaker 3:

Bye, thank you so much. Bye, thank you.

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Amanda Schaefer

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