53. Start Here: A Simple, Effective Guide to Improving Your Body Image & Mindset

This episode explores the concept of body image and provides research-backed keys to improve how we perceive our bodies. 

Key points include: 

• Body image is more about our thoughts than our physical bodies. 
• Personal anecdotes from Jess about her journey from obsessive running to powerlifting. 
• Defining and differentiating the four types of body image: perceptual, affective, cognitive, and behavioral. 
• The importance of awareness in recognizing and reframing negative thoughts. 
• Self-compassion and visualization exercises to foster a healthier body image.
• Encouraging listeners to respect their bodies as they are and stop waiting for perfection.

So, hit subscribe and we'll chat on Friday.

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Connect with Jess HERE.

Stay Sturdy, friends.

Transcript

Speaker: [00:00:00] Welcome to episode 53 of the Sturdy Girl Podcast. I'm your host, Jess, and we're gonna talk body image surprise, . Have you ever looked in the mirror or caught your reflection and had an immediate positive, negative, or just absurd thought about your body? Or maybe you've had a moment where you just felt absolutely disconnected from this meat sack that we live in.

Here's the deal, body image isn't actually about your body. It's about how you think about your [00:00:30] body. And if that sounds like a minor distinction, let me tell you. It is the difference between spending your whole life picking yourself apart or actually living it. Every single one of us has a body image.

Some of us feel pretty neutral about it. Some of us spend a lot of mental energy obsessing over it. And most of us are somewhere in between. So today we're diving into what actually makes up body image. Why it's not necessarily about changing our body. And then five research backed keys to shifting how we see [00:01:00] ourselves.

The first key that we will talk about so much more later is awareness. If you remember nothing else from this episode, remember this, improving body image equals awareness first and noticing our thoughts because you can't change what you don't notice. Okay. Let that be the foundation for everything that we talk and always, when it comes to body image that awareness piece.

It is noticing it's doing nothing else with it. Besides becoming aware. [00:01:30] So a little side tangent for a minute before we dive into the deeper stuff, I wanted to talk a little bit about my own running strength, health, wellness, whatever you want to call it journey. Um, Early 20 tens. really obsessed with running, but not the, I love freedom of movement kind of runner, more like I need to burn calories and shrink myself kind of runner.

And I did, I lost 50 plus pounds with running and what was then termed clean eating, which that's a whole nother thing. But I [00:02:00] obsessed over miles. Weight, calories, paces. I thought I was taking care of my body, but in reality, it was treating it like, I don't want to say an enemy, right, but something that I had control, I had to control all of it.

And it was all about being smaller. And then, through an injury, I discovered lifting heavy shit. And something clicked. And this is a many year process, I want to be really clear about that. I started running longer distances in like 2010 okay? I started lifting 2014, [00:02:30] let's say? Lifting heavy shit 2018 2019, got into powerlifting in 2020.

So this wasn't a I picked up a barbell one day and then suddenly I was an absolute beefcake and a runner, This is a long process, but with this lifting piece For the first time in my life. I wasn't working against my body. I was working with it It was things where it was training for What my body could do and challenging myself in a different way and not just thinking about what it looked like Lifting weights [00:03:00] improved my running economy, my running pace.

It made my strong legs more efficient and helped me do more badass outdoor adventures. And eventually, I mean, you get into powerlifting and not only is there this incredible community that is accepting You're also learning to be a strong badass and yeah eventually I was picking up close to two times body weight off the ground I mean, how rad is that Here's the thing this body confidence this relationship improved relationship with my body It didn't just a [00:03:30] magically appear one day, right?

Like I'm saying the strength that took a long time to build And improving running it takes a long time To improve. It's the same way with our body image. I didn't wake up and suddenly love my body. But I acted first. And started treating my body with respect. Instead of punishing it. And what followed was a lot healthier relationship with my body. So that's really, that's key number two for keeping track here. And that's your actions shape your mindset. You do not have to wait until you love your body to treat it well.

[00:04:00] Conversely, your lack of action will also shape your mindset as well. So last week's episode was on what real self love is. And it was talking about that self respect piece. We're not necessarily going to love our bodies. We don't have to love our bodies to take care of it. Okay. So thank you for listening to my fun little side story.

Just some perspective on the timeline of growth and change and the choices that we make and how those impact our health, wellbeing, and our body So getting little bit more into body [00:04:30] image. There are four main types, perceptual, affective, cognitive, behavioral. perceptual is how you see your body. Fun fact, your brain can 100 percent distort this. Have you ever looked at a picture of yourself and thought, wait, do I actually look like that? Yep. That's perceptual body image. This also, When we talk perceptual, we could get bigger here and talk about things extreme as like body dysmorphia.

But while that is kind of, that is out of my scope, we won't go there, but that is that direction. This is just talking about the day to day body image disruptions of like how we [00:05:00] see our bodies. Okay. Second one, affective, is how you feel about your body. Some days, you feel fine. Other days, one bad dressing room mirror or the camera at the self checkout at the grocery store you catch your, your reflection and you're like, oh my lord, sends you down a nice spiral.

Right. This could also be feeling good in your body after completing a tough workout or feeling ashamed of your body during like swimsuit season, right? This is the feelings, right? So we [00:05:30] have how we see it, how we feel about it, and then cognitive, what you think about your body.

Internalized messages and beliefs. This could involve critical things like, I'm too big, or I wish I had more muscle. These things are common, like all the research supports that cognitive distortions like these, like obsessively focusing on these certain body parts, common. You're not alone. So all of these things, we all have a body image.

Positive, negative, neutral, flexible, whatever it might be. It's working on that relationship [00:06:00] with ourselves. So please know that you are not alone in any of these things. The fourth type of body image is behavioral. So how you act based on those thoughts. Based on how you think about and feel And how you see your body.

This includes things like skipping events because you hate how you look constantly wearing oversized clothes to hide certain features about your body or covering up with like a large t shirt when you go to the pool

with all of this in mind, right? This was a big explanation of body [00:06:30] image. Most of the time. The focus is on that perceptual body image, how people look, but real progress happens when we address all four of these areas. And that's really what this episode is all about, which brings us to key number three, and that is separating thoughts from facts, right?

So we think about our bodies, Just because you think something, about your body doesn't mean it's true. We don't have to identify with these thoughts. So before we [00:07:00] get into the three main things, right? So I've got five keys in this episode, but there's three that will really hone in on. And then I have a little homework for you of ways to practice each of these, but I want to talk about the body image continuum.

When you look online and you look at research, there are a couple different versions of these, but I want you to picture going from left to right. This is also the canyon that we've talked about in previous episodes of the canyon between self hate and self love or body hatred, body loathing and body love, it's that [00:07:30] continuum. So if we start on the far left hand side, we have that body hatred. Hate everything about it. Can't look in the mirror, all the things. And we take one step up from that and we have body dissatisfaction and discomfort, right? So maybe we don't hate ourselves, but there's a lot of things that we're unsatisfied with.

We're uncomfortable in our bodies, right? And then there's body neutrality. I don't feel particularly positive or negative. It's neutral. It's just, it's a body. I exist inside it and the magic is inside me, not in my physical appearance. some of us, we may stop there. That may [00:08:00] be the goal. And then if we go one step beyond that, we have body acceptance.

Beyond that, we have body trust. And beyond that, depending on the continuum that you look like, it's body love, body positivity whatever resonates in that realm of beyond that trust and respect piece. And this, this may not ever be the goal for you, is body love, and that's okay, right? If you've listened to any other Sturdy Girl episode ever, we really try to bring that home.

That. The goal is never [00:08:30] necessarily body love or self love, body positivity, There are days when maybe you're just chilling in like the body flexibility piece, right? Accepting your body is, it is what it is. And then there's days when you pop back down to that body dissatisfaction, body discomfort.

And that's okay. is just giving us an idea of the scale of body image. Most of us won't wake up tomorrow in this body love category. It's okay. The real game changer here for us is moving from that body hatred piece to neutrality, [00:09:00] to having these skills and the tools to move out of that hatred and negativity space.

And that's really, When we talk about these keys, the fourth one is stop waiting for the perfect body to start living. And so in this, it's talking about taking action. And so when we say moving from body hatred into somewhere above into body neutrality or acceptance or learning body respect or body trust, your body is not an obstacle to happiness.

It's the [00:09:30] vehicle that gets you through life. It is the meat sack that allows you to experience all the magic in the world. So all of this is about how do we navigate that? So remember I said, if you remember nothing else from this episode, it is awareness equals body image improvement.

Okay. And that is like the main thing. That I want to hone in on here. So let's reinforce some of these keys we've been sprinkling in. First one, that awareness, okay? Before we change anything, we need to notice what's happening. Wildly. The goal here is to pay more [00:10:00] attention to the thoughts about our bodies, work on practicing these skills, right?

So it's gaining more awareness Of it to then eventually think less about our bodies. A healthy body image is not thinking that our body is wonderful. All of the time. it's paying less attention to it. That's the goal. But sometimes to get there, we have to pay more attention first, even notice how we talk to ourselves, how we respond, how we react, All those areas of that body image. And these [00:10:30] things take practice, they take time and patience and work, it's continual. It's not like, okay cool, I have a good relationship with myself, moving on to the next goal, It's always there. So a little practice on the awareness piece. I want you to, if you are not multitasking and listening to this, Set a five minute timer.

Okay? So you're going to pull out a sheet of paper or the notes app on your phone. And for five whole minutes, I want you to just write down every body related thought that pops into your head. Okay? No judgment. Just [00:11:00] observe. The goal isn't to fix these thoughts. It's just to recognize Any similarities, any patterns, what comes up?

Okay, so really truly hit pause here. Awareness, five minute timer. Let's see what we come up with without judgment. Okay, did you pause? I hope you did. I hope that this is a little moment of taking action, of applying what you're listening and learning because it's so, so, so important. This is reinforcing that awareness, okay?

Practice. The next thing here is noticing [00:11:30] without judgment. Okay. And that's key number three, which was separating thoughts from facts. Your thoughts are just things that pop up. They're not necessarily true and they don't have to have power unless we give them power. Most of us have some level of automatic negative body thoughts, and we tend to believe them.

And they come from all kinds of things, and this is actually another episode coming up this season to talk about all the things that influence our body image and how it's shaped. But media, friends, family, thoughts we started to think based on [00:12:00] experiences, and when those thoughts get reinforced over and over and over again, that's how a belief is formed.

So instead of going down that rabbit hole, let's try something called reframing. And all this is, is I notice. Okay, so look at that list of all of the things you compiled in the five minutes that you did hit pause and reflect here, Let's say you wrote down like, I hate my stomach. Instead of that, we reframe.

We take away some of that emotional power. We separate ourselves from that [00:12:30] thought. Little de identification, and we say, I notice I'm feeling uncomfortable about my stomach today. just that small shift, it turns down that emotional intensity, it detaches us just a little bit, and it makes it easier to shift later.

Okay, those two things, awareness and then shift, I'm noticing. If you wrote down something about, I hate all the acne scars on my face. 

You can say, I'm noticing that I feel uncomfortable with the texture of my [00:13:00] skin and it's making me feel self conscious. I'm noticing these things. You're taking away some of the power from that statement and it's allowing you to pull back just a little bit and get a little perspective on why we're saying those things.

Is that all tracking? Is that all making sense? These things seem simple, and it actually takes it takes time to think about and practice. But these are the main things. The main things that will help us to start to notice and to reframe. We're doing nothing else with [00:13:30] this. Awareness and reframing.

And then if we go a little more big picture, right? So, key number five. Is self compassion. Self compassion is a non negotiable. As we notice thoughts coming up and we're saying, I notice I'm feeling a lot of negative emotions towards the darkness and puffiness under my eyes today. Okay. We're practicing.

One piece of this self compassion is checking in with the words we're using. Would I say this to a friend, how would I react if I heard a friend say this to themselves? That's the check in with that self compassion. And if you want more info on [00:14:00] self compassion, because we could talk a lot about this I will link the self compassion episode of Sturdy Girl in the show notes.

But that's essentially just checking in, like, are you being kind to yourself? Not in a way that lets you get away with shit, but keeping yourself accountable as well.

Okay. one more practice thing. Cause like I said, there was going to be some call to action items here. And that is a visualization of your future self and the future of how you want to feel in and about your body. I want to do this together. So let's, [00:14:30] let's close our eyes, your eyes closed.

If you're, if you're not driving, if you're not doing things that require your eyeballs, and I want you to picture yourself. Six months from now. Your body hasn't changed. You haven't lost weight, you haven't gained muscle, gained fat, nothing. Your body is exactly as it is right now. your body image has changed.

So keeping in mind everything that you've just learned about body image, how is it different from where you are right now? What's different about how you feel? How you embody self. What do you feel free to do that [00:15:00] maybe you used to avoid? How do you think about your body? What kind of clothes do you wear?

Do you dress any differently? Do you carry yourself any differently? How does future you walk and talk and act? We could keep going on this, but just focusing in on if we change nothing else about our bodies, how do we wanna feel in our bodies in this physical meat sack six months from now? Because here's what's important.

This body image work is not about changing your body, it's about gaining mental freedom. It's living your life without letting your body [00:15:30] you back.

Okay, so, we have two little practice things you've already done. We've done this visualization piece. We've written down body related thoughts. We've practiced separating those thoughts from facts with the I notice statement. Okay? Those are your homework pieces. Practice them. If you notice anything come up, I would love to hear about it.

Send me a note through the link in the show notes or DM me on Instagram. But just remember, you don't have to love your body to start treating it with respect. Stop [00:16:00] waiting for some imaginary version of yourself to start living your goddamn life. Okay? And honestly, seriously, be kinder to yourself. It's not fluffy advice.

It is a research backed game changer, I promise you. Because body image work isn't about getting to some magical finish line where you wake up loving yourself 24 7. I think we've made that abundantly clear. It's about small, meaningful shifts that add up over time. It is continual work. I'm going to use work with quotes, right?

But it does take effort and sometimes it's crappy effort that we kind of roll our eyes [00:16:30] at that we have to keep doing. And it requires time and patience, but it does get easier with these things. And I promise, those shifts, they are so, so worth