121 Menopause Brain Fog: What’s Really Happening in Your Brain, Body and Nervous System

Forgetfulness, difficulty finding words, reduced focus, and that unsettling sense of mental “fuzziness” are common in midlife but they’re not a personal failing.

In this episode of Rooted in Presence, Carly Killen explores menopause brain fog through a nervous system lens, helping you understand what’s actually happening in the brain and body as hormones begin to shift.

You’ll learn:

• Why brain fog is common in perimenopause and menopause
• How oestrogen, cortisol, and the stress response affect cognition
• The role of the nervous system in memory, focus, and confidence
• Why pressure and self-criticism often make symptoms worse
• Practical, evidence-informed ways to support clarity and steadiness

This is not about “fixing” yourself or pushing harder, it’s about understanding your physiology, meeting yourself with compassion, and working with your nervous system rather than against it.

A grounding, reassuring listen for anyone navigating midlife cognitive changes and wanting calm, credible insight.

Thanks for listening to Rooted In Presence

If you’d like to get in touch with a question about today’s episode or find out how I can support you with coaching, here’s how to reach me:
📧 Email: carlykillenpt@gmail.com
📱 Instagram: @thestrongbonescoach

Do you crave unshakable confidence in your strength from midlife and beyond? Would you love to achieve your goals without sacrificing family time or self-care?

Ready to take your strength to the next level? Start building a stronger body and healthier bones with my Strong Bones Starter Kit; your step-by-step guide to safe and effective strength training at home.
👉 Click here to learn more and access today

🌟 Stay connected and inspired with daily wellness tips on Instagram @thestrongbonescoach.
🌟 For tailored advice or personal queries, email me at carlykillenpt@gmail.com

Thank you for being here, and I look forward to supporting you on your journey to strength, health, and confidence! 💪🦴✨

Transcript

0:00

Hello and welcome back to. In presence. I'm Carly Strength, menopause and Breath Work Coach, and of course your host. Now, today I want to talk about something that can feel deeply unsettling when it comes to midlife, especially around menopause and perimenopause, and that is brain fog. Are you familiar with this? I suspect if you're listening, you could well be. And what I mean by that is that feeling of those words just disappearing. Mid-sentence, forgetting names you absolutely know. You know, walking into a room and having no idea why, and just losing your train of thought. Just as you open your mouth. I'm especially good at that one. But for many women, what's hardest isn't just the forgetting itself. It can be the fear that comes up with it Those questions of what's happening to me, why don't I feel as sharp as I used to? Am I losing something? Will I ever get it back? So if that resonates, I want you to know this straight away. You are not imagining it and you're not failing, you're not broken, and you are not alone. Brain fog in menopause is real and it makes sense when we understand. What's happening in the brain, the nervous system, and the wider context of midlife. So today we're gonna slow this right down. We'll talk about what the brain fog actually is, why often shows up during perimenopause and menopause, and how to support yourself without panic or trying to fix yourself. And also I'll share a little of my own experience because this episode has very much been shaped by lived reality and not just theory. So let's talk about what we mean by brain fog then. It's not actually a medical diagnosis, but it's very much a felt experience. Many women I speak to describe it as difficult to concentrating slower recall, struggling to find words, mental fatigue, feeling less confident in conversations and needing more time to think and what's important to realize here is that brain fog is not the same as cognitive decline or dementia, although it can very much feel like that might be the case. And it's one of the fears that comes up a lot with those I work with. But there are many large studies, including long-term menopause research that show that for most women, these changes are temporary, fluctuating and reversible. Well, that doesn't make them any less distressing whilst still living with them, especially if your identity has been tied to competence. Sharp thinking, being the one who remembers, organizes, holds everything together. So, high Flying Career, ladies, I am talking to you, but that's not the only place that this shows up and this is where I want to just take a moment to say, it makes complete sense that brain fog can shake your confidence. So I'm going to share a little of my early experience. And actually it was one of the very first things that were a sign of perimenopause for me, which I didn't realize at the time. So for me, those first signs weren't hot flushes or night sweats. The first sign of perimenopause for me was that wobbling confidence, and it was back when I was working on the gym floor at a big commercial gym. And as my clients were walking towards me, somebody I knew very well. I was seeing them regularly. I knew the ins and outs of their world, their life, their goals, and yet suddenly nothing. When I came to recall their name, it just wouldn't come. I could feel the panic rising my body as I tried to stall smile by time, her mind racing faster and faster, which just made the fog feel thicker. I started to worry, what if this keeps happening? What if I look unprofessional? What if people notice? And then later on when I began leading sessions for women in menopause, even before Strong Bones Club was fully formed, I found myself worrying about finding my words, about sounding polished enough about being on it. And it took a conversation with a coach for me. To really realize that actually showing up as I was human, present, grounded, actually strengthened connection rather than weakening it. And that was an absolute game changer for me. And that moment changed how I relate to brain fog completely, because so much of the suffering can come not just from that foggy feeling, but the self-judgment that we layer on top of it. But there are some real changes happening in the brain, some actual science. So let's go into that. So this is all around estrogen, and I've mentioned before, but in case you're new here, estrogen doesn't just affect our reproductive health. It plays a role in our memory, attention, verbal fluency, learning and mood regulation. So yes, we have estrogen receptors. Over our entire body. And this also interacts with our neurotransmitter systems as well. Those ones that are involved in our focus, our cognition, and it supports the blood flow and energy use in our actual brain. So during perimenopause, estrogen fluctuates, predictably signaling can become less consistent. The brain has to work harder to do what used to be automatic. And yes, our brain is actually starving of glucose at this time because it's having to work so hard. And our brain functions mostly on glucose. This has a huge effect on our ability to function. And again, adding to this disturbed sleep, increased stress sensitivity, nervous system activation, and the emotional load of midlife, suddenly your brain is doing a lot more with much less support. And that's not as a degeneration, that is adaptation under strain. And research from the large studies in menopause show that while some women experience temporary dips in memory or processing speed during this transition, cognitive performance often stabilizes again later in our postmenopausal time. So basically your brain is not failing. It's recalibrating a bit like when we're teenagers, but we didn't have half the responsibilities back then, did we? Well, I know I didn't anyway, but there's something else that's often missed, and that is the nervous system and brain fog connection. So when our nervous system is in a state of chronic stress or hypervigilance, your brain will prioritize safety and threat detection. Survival. So things like creativity, word finding, nuanced thinking, are not gonna be a top priority. So if you are rushing and multitasking, worrying about how you're coming across, yes, that takes energy. If you're trying to match your former pace, then yes, this can intensify your brain fog. And not because you're incapable, but because your system is overloaded, and that's why panicking can make the brain fog feel even worse. And why compassion and slowing down makes a huge difference. So let's talk about how you can help yourself throughout this time. And let's just be clear on something first. This is not about biohacking your brain or pushing yourself back to where you were. It's supporting who you are now. So the first thing I want to mention is giving yourself permission to slow down. One of the most powerful shifts is simply allowing yourself more pauses, fewer words, and more time. And honestly taking the time to remember a word or taking that breath mid-sentence. It doesn't last as long as you think. It might feel like an age as you search for a word, but honestly, most people won't even notice. And if you're with the right people, they're gonna offer you more compassion back too. So let's not think about needing to be faster to be seen as more valuable. You are absolutely valuable as you are without doing anything else, but perhaps you can lean into ways to make yourself feel safer, and starting to take a pause and to slow down is a great way to signal that to your body and your brain. Next, reduce the performance pressure so when we stop trying to sound clever or get it right. Our nervous system can finally soften and then most of the time the words do come back. One of my favorite little things to do when a word just won't come or when I can't remember why I started a sentence, is to do that pause and to actually name the fact that the words have actually left me. And if it's important, they'll come back. And sometimes they do, sometimes they don't. But I love that level of honesty and others appreciate it too. And next, something I've mentioned a few times now, but let's give it its own little section. Self-compassion as a means of cognitive support. So instead of digging away thinking, what's wrong with me? How can I make this better? How can I be back to normal? Perhaps you can. Stop and acknowledge that something is shifting and you are allowed time to adapt. That change in your internal language does so much to reduce that stress chemistry in your body, and that overall will actually support your clarity. And next, your lifestyle as a whole, your sleep, your blood, glucose, rest habits. It's not about being perfect, but noticing are you eating regularly or are you running on adrenaline? Are you ever truly resting and allowing yourself to experience that rest? These are other signals that can show your body whether. It can generally soften and rest or whether they need to stay on alert. As I mentioned before, there's MRI scans of ladies in peri and post menopause. Those differences in the brain scans showing high activity in the glucose deprived brain. Whether estrogen receptors are no longer firing in the same way versus that postmenopausal brain after the adaptation, able to regulate and use the blood glucose again to fuel the brain. So remember, your brain needs fuel and recovery, especially now. Whilst I've mentioned nutrition, let's name that other layer of support here, and that is your medical and your nutrition support. Hormone replacement therapy can be incredibly helpful for some people, not as a fixed all, but as a way of restoring some of the buffering that estrogen used to provide for the brain and the nervous system essentially. I'm just topping up those hormones to support that gentle glide down into the post menopause era. So for women experiencing significant cognitive symptoms, anxiety, sleep disruption, low mood, HRT can reduce the load on the nervous system, which can help support everything else like your sleep, your focus, emotional regulation. It can feel more accessible again. And yes, it's not for everybody. And not everybody wants this, so it is not a decision to take lightly, and that's always a conversation to have with your healthcare provider based on your personal history, your own risk factors, and your own wants and needs as well. Based on your personal history and risk factors. And also, let's be super extra clear. This is not personal advice. A podcast cannot replace individual assessment. So even though I'm a registered dietician and menopause coach, this is me raising awareness not prescribing solutions. What matters is that support is personalized and brain fog and menopause isn't a one size fits all experience and neither is what helps. So yes, it can support you in clearer thinking, especially during the perimenopause and menopause window. And then that gentle reminder, again, HRT is not a one size fits all, and it's not always the best in isolation. It best works when we take care of the whole of ourselves, our nutrition, our movement, our sleep, our recovery. Our emotional health, and as a coach, I support women to take that holistic approach to make sure that they are supporting themselves in all of those ways, in ways that work for them. And then HRT tends to fill in the gaps again, only if it's wanted and needed and the right thing when we use this in collaboration with the healthcare provider too, but please do remember this, choosing HRT doesn't mean you failed at coping and choosing not to use HRT doesn't mean you're missing something. Both choices are valid. Support looks different for different bodies. So now let's talk about some of the supplements. I'm often asked what supplements can help for brain fog. So there's a few here that might be of service to you. There is emerging evidence for certain supports, but none of these are a magic solution. So again, taking one thing at a time and do collaborate with a nutritionist or a dietitian to ensure that these truly do work for you. So a few examples here we have lion's, mane, mushrooms. There are early research suggesting it can support nerve growth factors and cognitive function. I personally use this for myself and have found it really helpful. Again, only sharing my experience. Your experience could be very different. Omega-3 fatty acids. They can also support brain health and help to reduce inflammation. So if you struggle to eat oily fish twice per week, then a supplement could be super helpful for you. And next we have B vitamins, particularly B12 and folate. We can quite often be low in these, especially if you're following a vegan diet. But again, it's good to get these checked with your medical provider before you start supplementation. You can ask for a blood test and check if your B12 and levels are within normal ranges. And again, you can talk to someone who is qualified to process some of this information with you. This is something I do with some of my clients Because the normal ranges are quite broad, especially over here in our NHS system in the uk. So I often work with my clients to check on how they feel and notice the patterns that emerge with the blood results. And I do this because it's something I'm qualified to do. So please, whoever you do seek support from, ensure that they're properly qualified or do this in conjunction with your GP because. There's a lot of benefit to replacing the vitamins if they are low, because they are super important for cognitive function and your nerve conductivity as well. But if they're taking in excess. Quite often they'll do no harm, but they will be excreted in your urine. So I'm here to save you some time, energy, and money as well. We don't need to be taking supplements that the body is just going to excrete, essentially making it an expensive toilet trip. But the key point I want to reiterate again, is that supplements support foundations that do not replace them. If your sleep is disruptive, stress is chronic,, you're struggling with insulin resistance, so your nervous system is constantly activated. No supplement will override that. And equally important, not everybody needs the same things. More is not better, and supplements can interact with medications or be inappropriate in certain health contexts. So again, this is why I encourage women to speak to their GP on Menopause Specialist work with registered dietician or qualified nutritionist. And avoid self prescribing based on social media trends. Please. And even though I'm a registered dietician myself, a podcast is not the place for individual advice 'cause your body, your history, and your needs matter. So if you'd like personalized support, that's a conversation we can have properly, and you can get in touch with me via my website, carlykillen.com reach out to me at the Strong Bones Coach on Instagram. So let's just bring this back around to the nervous system for a moment. 'cause what matters most really is that HRT supplements, nutrition, breath work, nervous system care. None of these are competing approaches. They work best together in context. Brain fog improves when the nervous system feels safer, stress chemistry reduces sleep becomes more restorative. And the brain isn't under constant performance pressure. And this is why I always come back to that understanding first, because once you understand what's happening, you can make informed choices rather than reactive ones. And alongside all of this, the science, the nutrition, the medical options, there's something that often makes the biggest difference of all, and it's how you treat yourself whilst you're moving through this. Because so much cognitive load comes from trying to hold it all together, perform competence, hide the wobble, and pretend nothing has changed. When you give yourself permission to slow down, to forget a word, even to pause mid-sentence, and to show up as you are, your nervous system gets the message of safety, and safety is where clarity begins to return, Which brings me to my final point, being yourself helps more than you think, and this was a huge lesson for me when I stopped trying to hide the brain fog, it lost some of its power. Connection doesn't come from flawless delivery, it comes from presence. So as we bring this to a close, offering you a gentle reframe. What if brain fog isn't a sign you're losing something, but a sign that the old pace no longer fits? Perhaps it's asking for more spaciousness, more honesty, more self-trust, and a different relationship with efforts. Midlife isn't about proving how much you can still do, it's about learning how to support yourself wisely. And if you're experiencing brain fog in midlife, allow me to remind you again. You are not alone. You are not failing, and this does not mean you're on a downward spiral. The brain is responding to change and with understanding compassion, supporting a nervous system, things can and often do, settle down. And if you'd like some support navigating this inner grounded nonjudgmental way, that's exactly what my work is about. Whether that's through coaching, breath work, or my rooted menopause sessions, you don't have to figure this out all alone. So that's it for me this week. Until next time, may you meet yourself with Compassion, walk with Presence, and remember, you already carry everything you need.