the OBJECTIVE JERK

HEAVEN JUST UPGRADED IT'S SECURITY: Chuck Norris Dies And I Wonder Who’s Next

Jerk Season 4 Episode 229

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0:00 | 30:00

I tweak my recording setup so I can hit record faster and keep the vibe relaxed, then I wake up to the news that Chuck Norris has passed away. From memes to mortality to the “celebrity deaths come in threes” idea, I bounce through pop culture, faith, and the way media shapes what we feel.


• Changing my podcast studio setup to reduce friction
• Choosing a black-and-white look for consistency across shows
• Reacting to Chuck Norris dying and why some celebrity deaths hit harder
• Chuck Norris memes as a kind of online mourning
• Detour into Snot’s new singer and thoughts on replacement vocalists
• The “deaths come in threes” pattern and why people believe it
• Nicholas Brendon’s death and the long toll of addiction
• Handling atheist insults without getting baited
• Bones, embedded ads, and how product placement breaks immersion
• Reading Chuck Norris’s bio: family, faith, and politics
Put down in the comments who you think the third one will be.
Let me know what you think of my new studio.


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Again, thanks for hanging out with me! 

Please feel free to comment or send an email to theobjectivejerk@gmail.com

New Studio Setup And Vibe

SPEAKER_00

You were listening to the objective jerk, and I am said jerk.

SPEAKER_01

Hello, how you doing? Yes, I moved my stuff around again.

SPEAKER_00

I I had to do too much setup the way I had it before. I had to move my chair, get the camera out, stand it up. I don't know, it was just like it was so much. And I'm uh you know, a lot of times when I do my podcast, it's kind of off the cuff suddenly, and so I want to get recording as soon as possible. And then so with that, it was like by the time I opened the pro, it did everything, it was kind of like I lost my mojo or whatever. Plus, I'm lazy, you know. I like to just turn on, go. I just gotta get used to looking at the camera there. But does it really matter if I look at you? I'm talking to you.

SPEAKER_01

But so now I can look at my computer instead of my phone and I'm in my comfy chair. Yay.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, I didn't want to have the my cabinets back here as the background, but I played around. Originally I wasn't gonna put, you can see I got the flag there, but it's actually it's a mirror. The flag's over there. And then I got the Punisher photo, but I wasn't gonna put anything up until someone made a comment on uh my YouTube channel where they're like, just looking at this guy's background, you know what he's all about, or something like that. And I thought it was funny, and I was like, well, yeah, exactly. That's the whole point. That's what people do, right? I mean, if you're a nerd and you like pop culture, you got that crap behind you. Or I mean, not everybody. Some people just have a basic shelf with some books and whatever, but like this is just stuff that I have. Like, I'm not I didn't buy stuff for my my podcast set or anything like that. It's just like, oh, I'll put this here. I guess. Oh, okay, I got this. Because you know me, I'm lazy. But now I can sit in the chair. I think I was rushing my podcast a little bit. I want to try and just like chill and act like I'm hanging out. So that's kind of and it's it's just much easier this way. I got the camera set in a fixed position. I just move the mic, it's it's a lot easier. So let me know what you think. And then plus, I'm not gonna do the filters, it's all gonna be black and white. Because I was like, you know, I do the filters, but then if I I'm looking to, you know, be a guest on other people's podcasts or whatever, and then it's not gonna you can't do the filters for that.

News Hits: Chuck Norris Passed

SPEAKER_01

So you know, I was like, well, what can I do? So I was just like, I'm gonna do black and white. I don't know, I'm weird. Anyway. So woke up this morning for me.

SPEAKER_00

This happened early morning yesterday for me, but in the States, but that was or I don't know. Anyway, it happened. A lot of people have known about it, but I woke up to it.

SPEAKER_01

And Chuck Norris sadly passed away. Or Chuck Norris, what was the one thing?

A Quick Detour Into Nu Metal

The Deaths Come In Threes

SPEAKER_00

I don't know, he just he leveled up, he started the Rapture. I don't know, whatever you want to say. You know, in in input Chuck Norris joke or meme, which they're pretty funny. My favorite one was the Chuck Norris caught all the Pokemon using a landline. I always thought that was funny. Because I was right when Pokemon Go was going. I mean, it's still going. I see my kids still play it sometimes. But yeah, so man, but it you know, it's dude. I love Chuck Norris. You can't not not love Chuck Norris, but he's not one of the ones that's really gonna hit me. Like I said, I'm not a huge infatuated with celebrities, and you know, I'm a realist and I'm Catholic, and everybody dies, and it's part of life. So I did see that it was reported that he went to the hospital, and I was thinking, uh-oh, here it comes. And then sure enough, next when I wake up, gosh dang it. He had passed away. What's weird though is like they're saying like they don't want to say what he passed. Gosh, why do I have it's annoying. Sorry. I know people listen to this are like, oh my god, maybe some people get off on it. Oh I love snot. Dude, speaking of snot, the band snot, they got a new singer who sounds just like the original guy, which I don't know, it's been 30 years, so I think it's okay. You know, it's not like Lincoln Park, where they get a female, which I get having a female. I was never a huge Lincoln Park fan. I did have their second album. I don't even know how you say it. Metora, Metora, Metoria. See, that's how much of a fan I am. I like the and I no, no, no. I did have another album, came out in 2007, I want to say. I don't know what it was called, but I like some of their stuff, but I wasn't like, you know, I can't remember the last time I listened to a Lincoln Park. And I hear, you know, the the female is good, and it kind of for me, to me, just from my point of view, it makes sense, you know. It's only been, well, gosh, how long ago did he die? Like 10 years ago, actually. Or maybe not quite 10. But anyway, so, you know, but like it it always was kind of when people, a singer left back in the day or died, or whatever, and then they just recruit somebody that's basically a clone. It was like eh, it doesn't work. But this guy is that kind of, he is sort of a clone of Lynn Strait, but it works though, I think. I know he sounds good, man. He sounds he almost sounds better than how Lynn sang live, you know what I mean? Because that type of vercity on the album, and then when you hear it live with Lynn Strait, I mean it sounded good, and you knew it was him, but he couldn't hit everything. And this guy's like he's killing it, so I don't know. It's kind of cool. I'm interested to see their album that they come out with next. I'll I'll I'll download it, but but that's cool. Anyway, kind of went off base there a little bit. So yeah, Chuck Norris died. It's sad. Like I said before, like Sylvester Stallone, Clint Eastwood, probably Arnold too. Like, whenever they go, that's gonna be like, man, that's gonna be a little bit of a a bummer for me, you know. I mean, it's a bummer. It's a bummer that Norris is is gone. But I mean, you know, he's 85, I think. It happens, it's time, you know. But now say that that would be a good meme, right? If I could I make memes, but they nobody cares, and they're not like elaborate. But like if I was good enough to do one, do like a little drawing or AI, I guess, of like of like Satan, like he's doing his planning, right? And he's like, Okay, we're gonna do this and that, and blah blah blah, blah, blah, blah. Kind of like the the Hitler video from that one movie, but they put different subtitles about Chuck Norris, and then somebody comes in and says, uh, you know, your darkness or whatever. Chuck Norris just died. And then he's like, Oh shit, because now he's gotta deal with him as a as an angel, or uh, you know what I mean, so he can actually hurt him more.

SPEAKER_01

I don't know, that'd be funny. Yeah, and then so then immediately I'm like, okay, so who are gonna be the next two, right?

SPEAKER_00

Because they always come in threes, right? Well, before I get to that though, let me see. I did pull up articles to kind of let's see, see if there's something that's been yeah, so Chuck Norris was oh 86. Okay.

SPEAKER_01

He just had a birthday, just turned 86. Alright. It's kind of crazy, man. Anyway, let's see. Let's get down to I'm scrolling. You think this guy's been around for a while? So much what's going on? Dang, man. Why is everything opened?

Nicholas Brendon And A Hard Life

SPEAKER_00

I hate that when Wikipedia Okay, in March, yeah, hospitalized in Hawaii, experienced a medical emergency. He died on the 19th. His family announced his death one. Okay, so that's it. That's all they got. But there was a statement where they're like, you know, we don't want to share what what it was, and that's kind of weird. You know. Hopefully it's nothing nefarious. I doubt it, but you know. So anyway, so, you know, I was like, I wonder who the other two are gonna be, because it's it always comes in threes, right? And sure enough, I seen just when I was getting things set up for the podcast, Nicholas Brendan, who he's nowhere near Chuck Norris, and he's not you know super famous. He was in the 90s and stuff because he was on the show Buffy. So he was Xander on Buffy, and so he died. I don't know what his stuff is. I know he had problems with drinking and stuff, so let's find out. So he's had some problems. Let's see, personal life and illness. Yeah, well, let's see. Health issues. Yeah, okay. Brendan died of natural causes in his sleep at age 54, which was announced by his family. So it's just, you know, his body shut down after over after years of decades, probably, of drug and alcohol abuse. It tears you up, man. You know, it's sad. See, Brendan was married to some actress. Okay, he enjoyed painting. Brendan struggled for many years with depression and alcoholism, leading to many run-ins with the law, multiple arrests, several convictions for destruction of property, vandalism, theft, domestic violence. At a convention in 2004, he announced that he had voluntarily entered rehab. But I know he's had some other stuff. Yeah, so 2010, 2014, 15, 15, 17. He was arrested in August of 2021 for failure to identify and obtaining a prescription by fraud. So they're, you know, it's just he had problems, it sucks. Many, many, many people deal with this.

SPEAKER_01

But I kind of wonder, I heard that they're doing a Buffy reboot or a movie or something, I thought.

SPEAKER_00

I saw something. I wonder if maybe that's going on and he wasn't included. And I hope he didn't take his life, but yeah, so there's number two. So who's gonna be number three? I I mean, I don't mean to sound morbid, but it's the case. It's true though, it always happens in threes, right? And I know there was the singer from Boston, I think it was the singer, he died, but that was like a couple weeks ago, week ago or so. And whenever celebrities die in threes, that's always pretty, pretty rapid. So within a day or two, there should be somebody else that sadly passes. I'm betting it's gonna be a musician or something. Or maybe oh man, I hope it's not like Mel Brooks or something. He's pretty old. Yeah, uh, it's gonna be like who's up there now?

SPEAKER_01

Mel Brooks is old. John Cleese. Who was I just thinking about? Michael Cain, he's he's getting up there. I don't know, it's gonna be somebody.

SPEAKER_00

It's probably I'm assuming it's gonna be some musician, probably. That's I mean, I don't know. How long ago did the guy in Boston die? Let's see. Maybe that's the one that counts. Let's see. Was he the original singer though?

SPEAKER_01

Boston. I don't know.

SPEAKER_00

I think I know the one bot well, I probably know more than one Boston song, but I wasn't like a fan. I wasn't like a hater or nothing either, but just wasn't my thing. More than a feeling. More than oh, you know what? No, I'm getting these guys confused with Foreigner. Yeah, Boston was badass.

SPEAKER_01

Okay. Let's see. Since Delp's death, memorable Oh, so okay.

SPEAKER_00

So Delp was the Brad Delp. Let's see. So he was the original sing? He died in 2007.

SPEAKER_01

Okay, so he wasn't the original. Tommy Gary. Maybe it wasn't Maybe it wasn't Singer. Hold on, let me see. Let me scroll down and see who it was. Thought it was. Appearances. I gotta go to July.

SPEAKER_00

Tom's always working on some DiCarlo. Okay. So DiCarlo died from being brain cancer on the 9th. So yeah, that was kind of that was a while ago.

SPEAKER_01

Exactly 19 years after Delp's death. Wow, that's crazy. So Yeah, it's been more than a week. I don't know if that if that qualifies for the you know, Celebrity 3 or whatever. Let me see. So what was his name? I just forgot it. Dang it. So DiCarlo. Okay. Okay, yeah, so this was a guy. So he was a villain.

SPEAKER_00

So he wasn't an original one, but guy to brain. So I mean he, you know, Boston's famous, but nobody really knows of this guy. I don't mean to like, you know, shit on the guy or anything like that, but I don't feel that's quite the same. But maybe that's, you know. Maybe I don't know. What do you think? Does that qualify? Is that the three? I'm kind of thinking not. I think there's gonna be somebody else.

SPEAKER_01

Unfortunately. Who do you think it's gonna be? Probably something will come up before I even I'm checking my Facebook.

Chuck Norris Memes And Favourite Film

SPEAKER_00

It seems like Facebook is pretty good at getting getting it out first. I know they used to do the they'd fake people out a lot, but they don't that doesn't really happen anymore. Because, you know, when I see a death on Facebook, I'll I'll verify it before I, you know. But it's a good starting point. Yeah, see, there's nothing but Chuck Norris stuff going on. Yeah, Heaven just upgraded its security.

SPEAKER_01

Dude, my favorite Chuck Norris movie is Firewalker.

SPEAKER_00

I don't know. I used to watch that movie. It used to be it'd come on cable or something a lot, and I'd watch it with my grandfather. And it was, you know, funny, and it was like Indiana Jones, but you know, he could fight.

SPEAKER_01

Not that Indiana Jones can't fight, but but yeah, so that was my favorite one.

SPEAKER_00

So I mean it's a bummer. It's you know, it's gonna happen. Man, nothing but Chuck Norris stuff. Oh, yeah, that's right. What do you mean? He was on uh dodgeball and he gave the thumbs up, and then what's his face? He's like fucking Chuck Norris.

SPEAKER_01

Forgot about that.

SPEAKER_00

Forgot uh wow, that looks like a bunch of oh yeah, that's what they're saying. Okay tragic news, yep, yep, yep. Oh, let's see. Here's another one. Mm-hmm, Mr. Norris. God said it's time, so please don't round.

SPEAKER_01

Oh, it's it's death coming to get him. Offered him the throne, so now Chuck Norris is death. I don't know. He likes, I don't know. But how did he do it? Right. It was because death didn't come to collect him. It was Jesus.

SPEAKER_00

He's like, hey bro, it's time to go. Oh, okay. I hate when stuff automatically plays. But so, yeah, anyway, so that's what's going on.

SPEAKER_01

Chuck Norris. Man, I'm kind of done talking. I'm only halfway through.

SPEAKER_00

I got the atheist guy on pitch throwing a bunch of atheism at me. It's funny.

SPEAKER_01

Calling Jesus Jew on a stick. I don't know if like they're I don't know, I've never like you're not gonna offend I mean it's I'm not worried about this guy's relationship with Jesus or anybody else.

SPEAKER_00

I'm worried about mine and my family, you know what I mean? So if somebody's gonna like it's like I'm not gonna get pissed and be like, oh yeah. It's like, alright, well it sucks for you, dude, but you do you, you know?

SPEAKER_01

Hopefully someday you'll come around, but chances are they probably won't.

Bones, Ads, And Product Placement

SPEAKER_00

And then by the time they realize it, it'll be too late. Let's see. I was gonna look at Chuck Norris's personal life while I'm doing that. Still watching the show Bones. I keep talking shit about it, but it it is a pretty good show, and there's lots of good, heartfelt family kind of whatever. It does kind of seem like it pushes a lot of liberal stuff, but it doesn't do it too much, and that's how shows used to do it. Now it's like that's all they do, and it's insane.

SPEAKER_01

But dude, I cannot stand the hippie girl, she just bugs the hell out of me.

Chuck Norris Family Faith Politics

SPEAKER_00

And then the the commercials inside the episodes for Toyotas, you know, where they do like a quick little, it's like a YouTube channel where they do the little, you know, sponsored. And it's like, oh man, how's your car doing that? Like they put it into the show. It's pretty clever, but at the same time, it's like, oh my gosh, dude, it pulls me out. And then I start thinking about like I didn't catch it at first, but then there was a time where it was just obvious, and it was like, oh my gosh, this is because Toyota's sponsoring the show, and I'm just like, oh, and you know, it's not like that's the only show, but now it's got me kind of thinking of some other shows. But that's I don't know, I don't like it. I'll have to have to watch. I don't know. It's just you know, see now I'll start seeing that in other stuff. It's almost like subliminal messaging, you know, for whatever. But all right, real quick, I didn't go over Norris's personalized family. So Norris married Diane K. Paul Czech. Well, she died last year. California. He was 18 and she was 17. The two had been classmates in North High School and Torrance. We married his high school, that's cool. After 30 years of marriage, they oh they separated in 88. Oh no, okay, they got divorced. And they finalized their divorce. See, it's crazy where I think, like, man, 30 years. You got divorced after 30 years. Like, to me, it's like if you can make 10, it seems like, okay, you're good. I recently celebrated my 20th, and I'm like, that's you know, and then to see that people got divorced at 30, it's like, wow. They had two sons, Mike and Eric. Okay, Norris married Gina O'Kelly, a model, 23 years is junior, of course. In '98. They met while Norris was on a date with another woman. The couple had fraternal twins in 01. Norris also has a daughter, Dina, from an extra mental extramarital relationship. It's a bummer. While stationed in California during his service. Oh, that was a long time ago. Well, not that it makes it better, but he began seeing a woman named Joanna without disclosing that he was married. Well, maybe that's why they maybe that's why they got divorced after 30 years as he kept being you know, kept sleeping with other women. You know, who was it? Bill Burr, who's kind of a douche now, but he has a good bit about how. You know, being a celebrity or whatever, when hot women are just throwing themselves at you, it's a lot harder to fight off when as opposed to like a normal person like myself, where I don't have maybe like one attractive woman might appear to show some interest in me. Like that happens like maybe once a year, you know. So it's like it's not like daily. So it's you know easier said than done, I guess. But anyway, so he publicly acknowledged her in 2004 in his memoir. Okay. He has 13 grandchildren well in 2017. All right, Norse was an outspoken Christian, author of several Christian-themed books. He expressed his support. He's probably a Protestant, though. Support the intelligent design movement and a review of Ben Stein's something. He was a Baptist, yeah, and a member of Preston Wood Baptist Church. Political, I know he's Republican. Yeah, he was a Republican, outspoken conservative. So during the filming of Delta Force in 85, Norris commented on the hijacking of flight TWA 8047, or in the United States that was becoming a paper tiger in the Middle East and warring that terrorism abroad would eventually reach North America. He cited statements by a Libyan leader. Yeah, so 2007, Norris traveled to Iraq. Supported Mike Huckabee. McCain was too old to handle the demands for the presidency.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, I don't know. McCain, I don't know.

SPEAKER_00

McCain wasn't bad, but he wasn't good either. 2008, Norris became one of the first members of the show business to express support for California Proposition 8. Ban on same-sex marriage. You know, I used to like not care about that. I was like, you know what? So what? If they want to be whatever, this and that. But now it's like that was the beginning of the end right there, man. Double standard he perceived in criticizing the Church of Latter-day Saints. In 2009, he expressed support for Barack Obama. Oh, for the birthing conspiracy in his letter released to disclose his birth certificate. Yeah, that was a little crazy. 2011, Norris had written a five-part investigation regarding the infiltration of Sharia law in the United States. Yeah, there should be no Sharia law in the United States. I'm sorry. If you want Sharia law, go back to the country where it has Sharia law.

SPEAKER_01

Man, a lot of stuff on political stuff.

SPEAKER_00

Okay, let's see. Norris visited Israel multiple times. And Prime Minister Benjamin Nintendo.

SPEAKER_01

Dude, who he's been I don't know, dude. I'm I mean, I've talked about it before. I believe. I don't know.

SPEAKER_00

I don't think that they need, I don't think Israel needs to be given all these passes and we need to support everything and let them do whatever they want because they're Jewish. You know what I mean? And it's like the they were a huge part of the plan back in the day, but they're just like anybody else now. Just because they're Jewish doesn't mean they get a free pass.

SPEAKER_01

And then they well, and then plus they, you know, yes, they're an integral part in the future. But I don't know, it's like I don't know. Like I you know, I agree that we needed to go into Iran and this and that. But Iran's trouble, you know, or a bully.

Buffy Nostalgia And Being Introvert

SPEAKER_00

You gotta take care of the bullies, man. Some people might say that America's a bully. Yeah, okay. Yeah, sometimes, you know, like I said, I'm not a fan of the world police, but I, you know, we gotta. It's just like the Crusades, you know. It's like Christians let the Ottoman Empire kill and destroy, you know, pilgri pilgrimages and whatever for like hundreds of years before they the first crusades. They're like, okay, well, we gotta put a stop to this. You know, it's just again, be nice until it's time to not be nice. So anyway. But I think that's so that's a little bit his. So I read all that. I read this guy already. Buffy the Vampire Slayer. I used to watch that. That was like about the last time I was in to watch it, or I kept track. I remember that was when I my first apartment away from my parents with my friend, and I knew what was on which days, you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_01

So I'd I'd watch Buffy and Friends and Seinfeld. What else did I watch?

SPEAKER_00

Trying to think. I mean, there was a couple other ones, but that was pretty much it. I tried watching Dawson's Creek, but it's it was too soapy for me. I remember when it first aired, though, I remember watching the first episode.

SPEAKER_01

It was around that time. But yeah, it was, I don't know. My friend, I was I'm an introvert, so I like to staying at home. I like to be by myself. And yeah, my friend used to kind of give me crap about it, and it's like, well, this is where I'm comfortable, you know. It's just the way it is.

SPEAKER_00

But yeah, so Chuck Norris, it's a bummer. Nicholas Brendan, it I don't know, I don't care either way. I hope I'll be found Jesus and he did die in his sleep naturally.

SPEAKER_01

But I don't know. Yeah, it's not like it's oh my gosh, I'm so upset.

SPEAKER_00

It's just kind of that the three, the three, you know, the three celebrity, the whole thing.

SPEAKER_01

Um what do they call it? I don't know. It comes in threes or whatever. But let's see.

SPEAKER_00

Put down in the comments who you think the third one will be. Anyway, that's it. Thanks for hanging out. Let me know what you think of my new studio, which is not. But and then the atheist guy, let me know what you think. Alright, I'll see you guys later. God bless, and I'll see you next time. All right, bye.