Rebuilding Yourself After Trauma | Shannon Michelle | 201

What if rebuilding your life after trauma wasn’t about becoming who you once were… but learning how to embrace who you are now?

In this deeply moving episode of Manders Mindset, host Amanda Russo sits down with author, speaker, and trauma survivor Shannon Michelle for a powerful conversation about resilience, identity, healing, and the life changing power of staying present. After surviving a near-fatal motorcycle accident that left her in a coma for two months, Shannon shares what it was like to relearn how to walk, read, speak, and rebuild her life from the ground up.

Together, Amanda and Shannon explore the emotional journey of letting go of old identities, learning to accept life’s hardest moments, and finding beauty even in the middle of pain and uncertainty. Shannon opens up about surviving childhood abuse, building a successful interior design career, navigating physical and emotional recovery after her accident, and eventually transforming her experiences into a book designed to inspire others through trauma and healing.

This conversation is a reminder that healing isn’t always about returning to who you once were… 

Sometimes it’s about discovering a completely new version of yourself.

💡 In this episode, listeners will discover:

🧠 What it was like for Shannon to relearn how to read, walk, and navigate life after a traumatic brain injury
 🌿 Why staying present became one of the biggest lessons of her recovery
 💔 The emotional process of letting go of old identities and expectations
 ✨ How childhood trauma shaped Shannon’s drive, resilience, and independence
 📖 The unexpected journey that led her to writing and publishing her book
 🛁 Why relearning simple daily tasks became some of her biggest victories
 💫 How acceptance, grace, and small moments of joy helped her rebuild her life

⏰ Timeline Summary

[2:10] Shannon reflects on how her accident transformed her identity and perspective on life
[7:50] Growing up in a chaotic and abusive household while learning independence young
[15:40] Starting her first business at 22 and unexpectedly entering interior design
[28:15] The motorcycle accident that changed everything and surviving a two-month coma
[39:20] Relearning how to walk, read, and navigate life after traumatic brain injury
[47:30] Letting go of her old life and learning to embrace “Shannon Michelle 2.0”
[53:50] Writing her book, rebuilding purpose, and helping others through trauma
[58:40] Staying present, acceptance, and finding abundance through life’s hardest moments

To Connect with Amanda:

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To Connect with Shannon:

Website: https://stepintoyourmiracle.com/

Transcript

Welcome To Manders Mindset

SPEAKER_01 0:00

Welcome to the Manders Mindset Podcast. Here you'll find both monologue and interviews of entrepreneurs, coaches, healers, and a variety of other people, where your host, Amanda Rousseau, will discuss her own mindset and perspective, and her guest mindset and perspective on the world around us. Manders and her guests will help explain to you how shifting your mindset will shift your life.

SPEAKER_04 0:28

Welcome to Manders Mindset, where we explore the power of shifting your mindset to shift your life. I'm your host, Amanda Luster. I am here today with Dan Ros.

SPEAKER_06 0:39

She is formerly an interior designer and a single mom of a wonderful daughter, and she went through a very transforming journey that changed her whole life in the blink of an eye. And I am so excited to delve down how she has shaped her life into a miracle ever since. Thank you for joining me.

SPEAKER_03 1:05

Hello, hello, hello. So yeah, it's nice to hear. It's nice to hear my story through somebody else's mouth. I'll get it. I bet it is.

SPEAKER_06 1:16

So would you say Shannon is at the core?

SPEAKER_02 1:27

She is a reversal.

Meeting Shanna Michelle 2.0

SPEAKER_03 1:49

Sure. Yeah. I at the core I am a different person than I was before my accident. But I'm still the same. The core of me is still here as the same human being, but I have had to learn how to see myself through different eyes. And I'm no pun intended because now I use one. You know, it's it's been quite a journey to reshape yourself in a in a way that you never thought you would need to.

SPEAKER_06 2:25

Now I'm curious, you mentioned who you were at the core before your accident is different than who you are now. So wouldn't you say you were before?

SPEAKER_03 2:36

I always say that that I was Shanna Michelle 1.0 and now I'm Shandra Michelle 2.0. Um and she had we have the similar traits, but I ran my life in a very productive but reserved and protected way. And I came from a place where I wanted to, I was a big giver and doer, and it was very difficult for me to receive, receive, help, receive, truly receive in any way. I was very bad at receiving, and all I could do was give. And I know now because I physically and mentally had to refine myself, and I needed a lot of help and guidance along the way that I had to ask for a lot of things that I never ever thought I would have to depend on others the way that I had to post my accident. I ran my own company. I had my business for almost 30 years, and I was very successful here in Los Angeles. I thought I was living my life in the best way I knew how to at that point. And then I had an accident, and I literally was broken in every way that you can imagine. New hips, new parts and pieces had to be put back together. My brain was deleted completely. Like I woke up and I knew who I was, but I had no memory of my accident. And everything had been deleted. Like I had to relearn every little part of myself and my abilities. I had to learn to read again. I had to learn to know what a cell phone was, what a computer was, how to use them, how to cook. You name it, everything had been taken away. And I had to rebuild and refind myself again. And so I that's why I do say the Shanna Michelle 1 and 2.0. They're very similar, but I'd say 2.0 is much more open and engaging in every moment and staying stays super present for her life so that she can find places of joy and freedom and that pain because I went through a lot of pain physically and mentally. Like all of it, I'd learned how to handle and I don't want to say juggle, but that word just came to me.

Growing Up In Chaos

SPEAKER_06 5:09

I get what you're saying. I'd love to backtrack a little bit before we go further. That would can you take us down memory lane a little bit? Tell us about your family dynamic, childhood, however deep you want to take that.

SPEAKER_03 5:24

Um absolutely. So, and bear with me, sometimes I need to close my eyes to think because if I'm distracted, then my brain doesn't work as well. Um, as a child, I'd say I grew up in a very chaotic dynamic. My parents got divorced when I was six months old. We got traded back and forth between the two parents. We also my mom had a lot of mental illness and she got hospitalized. And so I went through a lot of trying to adjust and adult myself as a child. Um, we lived in Los Angeles and then we lived in Helena, Montana. So those were very extreme differences in environment and people. So it taught me kind of how to develop myself no matter where I was thrown in a way. And then I, you know, I grew up and all I really wanted to do was get out. And I wanted to get away from the abuse. I was abused physically and mentally, and I wanted to do whatever I could to escape the chaos I lived through. And I today can sit here and tell you that. But the Shannon Michelle 1.0 didn't admit to any of it before. She couldn't, she couldn't find strength within the the brokenness of her childhood. She couldn't share how much she had been abused or how much she had to be the adult in the family because both parents were alcoholics. And there was just a lot of growing up quickly that happened that now I know is why I'm kind of the super badass I am, even post everything I've been through, you know. At 22, I started my own business, had a little antique furniture store, and that turned into multiple retail furniture stores, and that turned into interior design world and post-the accident, which was I'm gonna go on a four-year anniversary, but it was during when COVID had become more part of everybody's lives. So we had to close down the businesses, bring everything home and trade out the way that we all lived for that period of time. And then I woke up one day in a hospital, looking outside, going, Where am I? thinking I was in New Orleans, like over and over again. Where am I? Where am I? And had to be told that I couldn't get up and I couldn't walk, and I couldn't remember that I kept repeating things over and over again. Okay. Um, and then you know, years now, years later, it'll be four-year anniversary and about what's the date today? Oh, I guess yeah. So in four days will be my four-year anniversary for my accident. Yeah, I'm again timelines are are interesting with my recovery as well, because I what I remember or don't remember past my before's and afters of a brain trauma have been a big part of me finding myself again. Like, oh, I'm not, I may not remember what I'm telling you right now, but that's just me. And it's okay that I don't remember the interview or I don't remember the person unless I do it multiple times. But I show up, I be me, and I share my story, and I hope it helps others.

SPEAKER_06 8:55

I'm sure it does. So I want to backtrack a tad. Do you have any siblings?

SPEAKER_03 9:02

I have one brother, he's two years older than I am, and I have two step brother and sister, but there was such separation that we never really, other than like when we were really little, knew each other and then lives separated and we don't even contact each other anymore. But my one core brother, he's just a good man, and he lives here in California. My mother is still alive, she lives in Illinois, so there was a lot of back and forth and a lot of my recovery with her. My father passed very soon after my accident, not because of that, because we were not in contact with each other either because he was an abuser, a sexual abuser. So I had no relationship with him anymore. And um, and then I had my uncle who's my father figure. My uncle is just he's a big part of my heart, and he he's a good man, and he kind of took over as my father figure in certain ways growing up, and now even. So he's my well, he's my extended papa bear.

SPEAKER_06 10:04

That's great. No, you mentioned it being difficult in your upbringing. So were you somebody who left the home at like 18?

SPEAKER_03 10:14

Oh, yeah. When I graduated from high school, I was out. The soonest I could start re start creating my life and doing life different was me. I was 18. I had just graduated high school when I was 18. And I can remember even my first apartment. And I worked as a waitress, and I had like, how do how can I make this work? How can I pay my own rent? How can I get buying through life without my family? Because I just know there was such chaos and abuse and neglect in that arena that I had to find my way out to find a better life that I wanted to create for myself.

Building A Creative Career

SPEAKER_06 10:51

Now, you mentioned you started your own business at 22. So in in between 18 to 20. What did that look like?

SPEAKER_03 11:00

She was she was uh gosh. I um I was uh a very waitress bartender at this very cool restaurant on Sunset Boulevard that was right across from the whiskey of go-go and all the all like kind of the rock and roll world. And that was my first outside of the box job. And I make good money and I, you know, learned how to even at 18 maneuver in a certain way to to, I don't, I don't know, to engage with others in a way where they connected to me. And the waitressing was a big part of how I was able to find a career within. I used to go to the flea markets and buy antiques and go to my apartment and refinish them in the apartment and then put them in my shop. It was the waitressing, which led to waitressing and starting an antique store. Um, so it was a combo. And then finally the retail took off enough where I made money and could live outside of the box of being a waitress andor a bartender. And I found a way to help people create beautiful homes for themselves, not for me. Like I know how to make it look beautiful, but I always wanted to make sure that it felt like them, that we created the space that kind of expressed who they were.

SPEAKER_06 12:44

Now, what made you decide, if you remember at 22, why then was it the time to start the business?

SPEAKER_03 12:52

It wasn't. I was just again, I had an opportunity that if you go into specifics, I was dating this gentleman and his friend had a coffee house and they had room next door. And I could, well, you know, you could use half of the front of the other side if you want. I'm like, sure, on Melrose Avenue. Like again, Melrose in this city, tons of beautiful shops, very high end. Like, well, here, take the front half, and this is how much your rent would be. And I was like, Oh, I'm gonna do that. I want I want to be creative. And I it wasn't like I was trying to get to where I was going. I just kept kind of trying to create and do things that felt like me. And then that turned into this guy, I knew that guy, and he's got this shop. And then I would again make things, I'd make little baskets of things for a tea or a basket. I would make baskets with like you know, the baskets that you would do the wine in with the glasses and whatever to take, take a basket, a food basket out to somewhere. I I did all kinds of stuff for my first in my first shop. Thank you for asking me that because I hadn't really thought about that post-my recovery. So I would make things and do things, and I was just always very creative. And I could always come up with interesting ways to make things look a certain way, to make it inviting, to make it fun, to make it colorful. That just came naturally for me my whole life.

SPEAKER_02 14:17

How about you?

SPEAKER_03 14:19

How about me? Yeah. Are you like do you like being creative? And obviously, this is a very creative environment we're in right now. It's what would you say is like the top thing that comes to mind when you say I'm creative as I'm creative as like whatever comes.

SPEAKER_06 14:41

Um, well, I I'm creative in a few different ways. I guess the podcast is creative. I honestly didn't think of that. Um, but I like to paint. Um and I'd say I'm also creative in like this is a little bit of a different aspect, but I facilitate breath work and we come up with playlists for them. And I'd consider myself pretty creative with them because it's some of it's even like, okay, we're not gonna play, I'm not gonna play this whole song. I'm gonna play this much of the song and then we're gonna go to the next one. So I'd say I'm creative in that aspect as well.

SPEAKER_03 15:18

Love, love, love it. Yeah, and that's again, that's a beautiful way that you just expressed yourself right now. You know, how we expand and how we kind of show up for ourselves when we were are imagining and thinking and creating, it makes us a much better us. All the different parts and pieces, you know. It does.

SPEAKER_06 15:38

I completely agree. So, how long did you do interior designing for?

SPEAKER_03 15:44

Oh gosh. Um, kind of the super high end of it was probably about 20 years, you know. Yeah, yeah. I had a very, very, very successful, very good business. And it was, yeah, that chunk of when I started doing the interior design. And I even walked into the interior design part, not really realizing I could do it. I was like, my shop was so cool. People would be like, could you come to my house? And da-da-da. I mean, that's how I stepped into the interior design world, it was not because I went to school and got the degree. I literally had my shop, and people were like, This is cool. Can you just do can you kind of figure this out at my house? And so it linked into my life in a very outside the box kind of way. But that was when I was at that point, I was probably 24, 25, had been doing my retail stuff. Maybe I was in that range. I'd have to think about that. But yeah, it and again, it just came out of me being the best me I could be at that moment when I knew nothing. Which I think all of us need to give ourselves that freedom, you know? Like, what's in me? What am I here to share? How can I express? How can I create? How can I learn? That I think is important for us all to ask ourselves.

SPEAKER_06 17:04

Now, did you go to school for anything? Did you go to college at all? Because you said you didn't go?

SPEAKER_03 17:10

I I went to PCC in Pasadena City College, and I went for a less than a year because I never thought I was smart. I had difficulties in certain areas, and in college, just was like made me feel even not very smart. And so thankfully, I stepped out of that because I was told, you know, the college career, blah, blah, blah. My my family was very high on getting a degree. And for some people, it does boost them and it does educate them and it does help them grow. And for some, it doesn't. And I think again, individuals are all so different, and how they can be creative is how they should be. But yeah, so I tried that for a little bit, but it didn't last very long.

SPEAKER_06 17:59

But you were great at the designing, even without the degree in it.

SPEAKER_03 18:03

I was, and also, I mean, considering my age and where I was at, I ran my own little business. Like I learned how to run a store by doing that. So there are these layers of I think all of us need to remember we're given so much, and we need to kind of be grateful for the things that we're given and the things that also that stress us and are difficult, those are just lessons for us. What do we need to learn? And how we learn them is also so different. Like for me, my life taught me so many lessons in so many different ways, but it's made me this better me. And everybody needs to remember to do that. Who's the you in you? Not the not the you you want be, not the you you think you should be, but who's the you in here, in your heart, not always in your head, just right here, start here, work with that and create the best life for you that you want to be. That's important too, I think. I completely agree, Shannon.

The Day Everything Changed

SPEAKER_06 19:18

So you said it was about four coming up on four years ago that you had your accident. Correct.

SPEAKER_03 19:26

February 6th, 2022. Again, I only know from like the paperwork and what people tell me because my the first year in my recovery, I couldn't retain anything. Like all I I could barely find a word. I was again searching for every moment. So that first year, year and a half, was seemingly looked good. Like I was able to walk again and talk again and um find my way, but that took a while. And then once I felt like I was through all my surgeries, because even post the I was three months in the hospital, two months in a coma, again, lots of surgeries. And even after they let me come home from the hospital, I had to continue on lots of surgeries to do, you know, my to fix my wrist so that I could use my hand. They tried to fix my eye, but because it's still in there, it's really cute, but it just goes in a different direction. So I've double vision. And so I had at a certain point, I was just trying to get better and better and better. And then I was really trying to get the old me back. I was trying to get my old life back. And one day, many days, I had to wake up and be like, that is not you any longer. Quit trying to search to be able to reopen your business, like all the layers of regaining my old life, I had to let go of. And that that's always hard too for anybody in any transition, in any trauma, like letting go of the paths and not staying so so present with it, like just you hold on stuff that has happened to you. And if you can't let it go, that gets in the way. And I had to let it go. And I had to let go of my old life, and I had to go let go of the old Shannon Michelle. I had to let go of, I had multiple motorcycles, and because it was a motorcycle accident, my my ex father of my daughter, he's like, You need to sell those. And I'm like, how would it? I'll be able to ride maybe someday again. He's like, maybe, but now is not, it's not now. And you need to actually sell those and get rid of those, get those out of your garage. So it's like these layers of letting go. I remember not wanting to sell a motorcycle that was still in my garage, even though a motorcycle accident had just almost killed me.

SPEAKER_06 21:50

I want to backtrack a little bit. How long had you been riding motorcycles before your accident, approximately? About five, six years on my own.

The Crash And The Helpers

SPEAKER_03 22:00

I had been riding on the back for many since I was probably 20. I'd been the person on the back, boyfriends, whatnot. But I started riding about five to six years before my accident on my own. It was what I called my Sunday school. We used to ride as a group and Sundays, and we would go up and down the coast of California and PCH and the mountains, and we'd Take beautiful trips on Sundays. It was like my little vacation day. And so yeah, I'd been riding for quite a while. I mean, not too long, but I was very good at what I did. And oh, and so the within the accident, I had been riding with my group and I was trying to come home because a friend of mine was coming with her husband to stay at my house because they were dealing with cancer and they needed to be nearby at UCLN. And they were coming to stay at my house to do their cancer treatment. And so I needed to get home to let them into my house. So I left my group and I'm like, okay, I can't ride anymore. Bye-bye. Driving myself home, and I was hit by somebody who did an illegal U-turn on Pacific Coast Highway, right on the beach. And they, from what I've been told, um, it threw me up in the air 30 or 40 feet, and I crashed down on my head. And these are where all the miracles started as well. Like I where my accident was on Pacific Coast Highway, there happened to be an EMT on the beach with his wife. He ran up and he did all these things that you do when an accident happens, and he thought I was gonna die. And he said, You gotta put her in a helicopter into UCLA. She's she's not gonna live if you put her in an ambulance. So they dropship me to UCLA. There was a gentleman driving his his car, and he saw the accident, and he was a rider. So he went and he locked and he made a block of all the cars on PCH so they wouldn't ride over me because it that could have been another layer of trauma. Um so those were the two little big blessings that happened to me, and then they drop shipped me to UCLA and kept me there in a coma for a few months because they were trying to get my brain swelling down, and they did, and did all again. The Belgian was supposed to put somebody back together, and then they shipped me home.

SPEAKER_06 24:16

How long were you in the coma? You said a couple months.

SPEAKER_03 24:20

Two months in a coma. They had to keep me in a coma for two months. That's how severe my accident was. It was a long time.

Coma Memories And White Light

SPEAKER_06 24:31

Yeah. Do you remember anything from waking up from the coma?

SPEAKER_03 24:36

I have some memories, but I what I have distinct memory of being mid-state. And I when I woke from my coma when they allowed me to reawaken, I kept asking for Bill, who was my father figure. His name is Bill Langford, and he was such a like a big part of my adult life. And I kept saying, Oh, Bill, Bill. And he's the father of one of my best friends. And he had just passed away about six, eight months before my accident. And I couldn't, when I woke, I was like asking for him because I remember him being with me mid-state. And I know that he was part of the reason why I was even able to come back into my physical body, because I was floating in a place where I did not want to come back, it was too much. And he would just he kind of just stop me and calm me down in a way. And if it wasn't, I don't know for sure, but if it wasn't for him being there, kind of just giving me space and time to not move on out or into the outbody death experience to come back because I had a daughter and he knew, and I think he was a big part of me surviving and thriving also, because I I remember the abundance that I could have stepped into versus the chaos I stepped back into my body. And that was vague. I write about that in my book as well. It's a whole chapter about remembering the angels that spoke to me and being surrounded by so much white light. Angels is a way, again, you have to put things into words, but the feeling and the essence of where I was, it's even hard to explain in our language with words because it's so empowering and beautiful. I've read and heard a lot about the accident because I didn't know the MT came up and saved me. I didn't know somebody blocked traffic. I didn't know that they drop shipped me. None of this I knew. I don't remember any of that. I've just been told via other people and you know, medical, all the reports and stuff that happens when there's an accident. That's how I know. Or at least I've been told, I should say. Because I don't have any memory of my accident, and I never want I never want to remember that. Because I physically don't remember my body being broken and torn and thrown up and thrown back down, and all of the the trauma that this body and brain went through. I don't want to remember it when I read or hear the stories from others. I don't want to I don't want to know that. Hopefully, I don't remember it.

SPEAKER_06 27:39

You think it's been more helpful for you since you don't remember it? Oh, absolutely.

SPEAKER_03 27:46

For me, and I don't, again, I think everybody is on a personal journey that that is the experiences that they're supposed to experience and the way that they they will learn and grow through. I'm just hopeful that I'd much rather trade off, as I say, I'd much rather trade off my short-term memory limitations than remembering that accident. I'm getting very comfortable with knowing that I can achieve certain things in a certain amount of way and continue in my life and in this limited way, because I am very limited in certain ways, which is ironic and stunning considering everything I had created and built. And then all of a sudden I'm like, I don't know how I'm like, I'm literally learning how to read again, even though I wrote a book because I spoke it into my phone. Like, how do you make sense of not being able to read a word that you used to know? But I can say it. I remember how to speak it, what it means, but I can't read it. I'm rebuilding that. I'm much better, but it's it's again that a way of dealing with profit and loss in your life, you know. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 28:59

Now, how was that journey? Like relearning to read, relearning to walk, how was all of that mind-blowing as well?

SPEAKER_03 29:09

Um you can't imagine there are, you know, we again are in an environment generally where you learn something and you can develop and kind of create from all of that. And it's such abundance for yourself. Like you learn something, you grow, and you're like, oh, that. And then all of that getting taken away. No, nobody ever thinks it's all gonna be taken away, like being able to read. You run a company, but now you can't read. Huh. That, you know, the this for that in our lives. Never try to sort it out because when you try to sort it out, that's when things to me get a le little more confusing. Spending too much time and energy trying to sort out how to do things better, other than staying present and being the best you. I I hope people just stay with being the best them, not trying to be anything more or less than who they are in that moment. Um, and I had to it, you know, they had to keep me, um, like they had to keep me in a wheelchair for even once they brought me home, I was still on a wheelchair. Um, I had to slowly learn and rebuild my strength and my body and my balance. Um, so I would wake up um in a lot of pain. And I would have my I remember one of my first goals was I loved baths. I love taking a bath. And I remember I'm like, I would really love to take a bath. And I was like at a point where people like had to help me do everything at this point. And I'm like, I want to be able to have the strength to take a bath, like get myself get myself to the bathroom first and foremost was first goal. First goal was being able to get my myself and go potty on my own, which I wore diapers as an adult. Crazy talk. And then after that, but I remember the most important thing was learning to or building the strength to be able to get up and in and out of a bathtub. I mean, it's so simple, and you do it for your lifetime and you don't think things are gonna go away. But I remember that being a goal. And I remember my daughter during was in college, but she'd come back for the summers, and I said to her, I remember saying to her, okay, I can get myself into the bathtub, but I don't know if I can sit myself back up to get out of it. So I'm just telling you, I'm going in the bath, but I might need your help and pull me back up. I mean, you trade off, like you learn to trade off. Like this is my daughter. Um helping re-raise me, my daughter at 20. She was when my accident happened, she was 19 and she was her first year of college, and she had to navigate through losing her mom and her mom's abilities to do things, and she had to mother me for a while, and so you just never know where life's gonna take you. I mean, but it was again in the transition, it was a lot.

SPEAKER_06 32:06

A lot. I I bet it was. Was it frustrating for you at times? Oh, yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. How how did you push through the frustrations?

SPEAKER_03 32:21

I had to I had to get comfortable with as much sorrow as I did enjoy. And I know that that is not easy to do either. I know that waking out in physical pain, mental limitations, it's like I had to find a way out of the darkness in a way, even though I didn't know how to. I took baby, baby steps in feeling better and being able to rebuild myself. But it was, you know, the bad days were difficult, they were painful, they were overwhelming, they were depressing. They were just they were heavy, they were heavy days, weighty days, painful days. And then I would just search for a good moment. I remember when I was learning to walk again, I have I would say kind of a kid's fall in the backyard. And I remember thinking to myself, I'd love to learn to swim again. And I would work towards just walking to the steps and then standing in the pool, and then taking the baby steps to physically and mentally learn how to swim again. Those are the ways I kind of got myself out of the sorrow, was just like, what can I do today? What can I try today? And I think again, everybody, no matter what they're dealing with or they're going through, it's like staying present and just trying to do what you can do today and not sort out tomorrow and not think about yesterday and just be here, be here, be present, be in this moment. Like I'm in this moment with you right now. This is a beautiful moment. This is my day. This is gorgeous. Like this fills my heart, and I think that I had to learn to accept my present moment for whatever it was, difficult or easy.

SPEAKER_06 34:43

I I like uh accepting the present moment for whatever it was, difficult or easy. I think that's big, accepting it sometimes, because sometimes we can't change the situation, you know. You can be upset, you can be mad, you can feel whatever you're feeling, but there's some things in life that we can't change. There was only so much you could do.

SPEAKER_03 35:09

True acceptance is sometimes a part of the change when you can accept the sorrow, when you can accept the pain, when you can accept the you that day, it helps you transform the next day. The hard days get easier by moving through them and experiencing them and accepting them and then growing from them. Because no matter what, I truly do believe, no matter what has happened to me andor to anybody, like it's just a part of growth and acceptance, and that turns into abundance if you let it.

SPEAKER_06 35:53

I'd love to transition a tad. Now, I know you're an author and you wrote a book as well, and I'm curious in terms of your accident, like how soon or how long after you wrote it.

SPEAKER_03 36:10

Well, that was a good moment too. So I didn't know I was writing a book. I was talking into my phone, and what had happened is I had one of those moments where I woke up and I just heard, finish your book, finish your book. And screaming at me. And I woke up, I was like, I'm gonna learn to read. I thought, but I'm gonna learn to read again. I'm learning, I'm learning, I'm growing. This is what I'm thinking when I have this insightful moment. I call my best friend and I said, Oh my god, I didn't, I don't understand. I I heard it, I heard it, but it I'm learning to read, Jess, I'm learning to read. And she goes, Yeah. She's like, finish your book. She's like, have you looked in your phone? Like, how many, how many, like, because I would speak into my phone to recreate myself and get through pain and all of it. And she said, Have you looked, have you looked at what you have on your phone? Have you looked at your notes? And I said, Well, I use them, yeah. She's like, I think you should really look at them again. And she's the one that had said that she's the one that started that guidance. Like, you have something to say, and you've already said it, and let's take a peek at that. And you need to keep taking a peek at that because you forget everything. So for me, even my book is first and foremost for me to re-remember who I am because I forget, I forget what I say, I forget what I wrote, I forget my book all the time. And I have this place where I can kind of relive my life by listening to my book, or at some point reading my book. But again, I do that very slowly, but I listen to it. And that story I don't want to forget, and I want to share how, and I have to, I need to remember how to move through life in a different way, and so that's how this came about, and all kinds of layers later, but the book was published, which was a big deal as well. I have an amazing publisher. It was published, finalized, and published on my birthday of this last year. So it was only six months ago that it was published and put out into the world, and it's my new journey.

SPEAKER_06 38:38

Now I'm curious. Then I ask everyone I speak to who's written a book, did you did you always think you would write a book about something prior to your accident? Did you always think you would be an author?

SPEAKER_03 38:50

No. I was a designer, I was an interior designer. I wanted to be known for my design work. No, the idea that this has even happened and it's it's so beautiful and it's so inspiring, that blows my mind. Like, no, it wasn't, it was not a goal of mine ever. It all came through me and to me through my journey. Oh, and then also, like I think I said to you, but I'd love to share that my daughter drew the cover for me. She took a picture that they had taken and she sat down. I asked her, but can you can you create create a picture for me for my book? Because they were saying we needed to get, you know, during the process of creating a book, you have to figure out the cover and all the other stuff that comes along with putting publish, getting up a published. And they wanted to hire somebody to do it. I'm like, Well, my daughter's really good. Let me ask her. And she's like, Yeah, mom. I'm like, okay. And so she drew my cover. Um I just got lost though, so redirect me.

SPEAKER_06 39:52

No worries, it's a very beautifully designed cover. And I thought that before she even told me that. So be sure to check that out. I want to transition back a little bit. In terms of your accident, you mentioned you were in the coma for two months. How long were you actually in the hospital? Three months.

SPEAKER_03 40:12

I was at UCLA, then I was at Kaiser, and then they sent me to a nursing hospital in Santa Monica, and it was around a little over three months, I think, but two months hospital, hospital, like major, a little more than that. And then about a month in a nursing hospital before they'd let me come home. And they didn't even want to let me come home yet because they didn't want me to try to come home until I could get out of a wheelchair. I had to beg them. I remember begging them, like, oh, it's my birthday, May 12th. And they're like, Well, you're gonna be, I don't remember the terms released or whatever, you know, the next week, because that way you can start walking at that point. I'm like, no, please let me go home for my birthday. I just want to be home in my own bed. And I they did. I had to talk them into well, I didn't talk them, I begged, and then you know, my partner, you know, did the work of making it happen. And then I was home in my bed, and I got a day before my birthday. Silly, silly rebirth stuff. I wanted to be just in my bed on my original birthday. I feel like I have a rebirth birthday. I have two birthdays now. A rebirth birthday. So when is that birthday? That to me is the accident day because I don't know truly what day I came back because I was in and out, but I kind of feel like the fact that I was safe and rebirthed on the day of my accident, that I was drop shipped into UCLA and they didn't think I was gonna live. And I remember being in another another place. So I call it my rebirth. My friends and family don't like that day for obvious reasons, but I appreciate it huge, huge. That like I was rebirthed, let me tell you. I might have been, I think I was I'm trying to remember, I'm now 56, and I think I was so take away the four years. So I was almost 52 due to my accident. I'm an older lady, even though I don't look it. So two birthdays.

SPEAKER_06 42:07

That's beautiful that you found a way to celebrate that day. I get why your family and friends don't, but I think there's some grace, and that you call it your Vebo's birthday, you know.

SPEAKER_03 42:19

I'll just have a moment right there too. My daughter's name is Grace. I love that. Oh my gosh. I've got her, but her name is Grace, and she was named after my grandmother. And yes, Grace is uh another important word in my in my life.

Breast Cancer After The Accident

SPEAKER_06 42:36

I love that. I love that. Yeah. I know you mentioned to me another illness that you had shortly after the accident. I'm forgetting about that. I'm curious if you were diagnosed with that in the hospital or not until after.

SPEAKER_03 42:54

No. Um, so it was about a year and a half after my accident. I was going through the multiple surgeries, and my doctor was like, You really need to get the mammogram again, your age, blah, blah, blah. I'm like, no, well, how long do we put that off? I've got more surgeries. I remember just thinking, I don't want to put off my other radio recovery surgeries because I needed to get multiple wrist surgeries post my, you know, them fixing things. And she said, No, you need a mammogram, you can't wait any longer. And so it was about a year and a half after my accident. And then they're like, Oh, gosh, what's in there? Oh, I've I've had that before. They've told me I might have it, and they go in, and then if there's not there's no cancer, like that has happened to me previously. And so I I was like, I've already almost died. If I was gonna go, it would be some other way. It would have been some other webs. And so I didn't take it to very serious, but I needed to because then they did everything they did, and they're like, Oh, oh, cancer. Okay, we gotta do this. And I'm like, oh, more surgeries, really? That was my thought at first with the breast cancer, and then it got messy, was stage one, but no, then they go in and it's actually stage two, and it's here and there, and so it was very the very eye opening experience. Even post all the trauma my body had experienced, I kind of needed to learn that just because you go through a lot of trauma doesn't mean more things can't happen. You need to balance out the Concept that you're not your plate doesn't get so full that nothing more can be loaded on top. And that lesson was important because I needed to understand that I needed to stay present and happy with whatever I have today. And that is today. And so that transition was multiple surgeries and then radiation for six weeks. And so and as my daughter said to me at one point, because I wasn't taking it serious enough at first. And she's like, This is the priority, mom. We need to take care of the cancer. You getting your eye fixed, and you getting your wrists and your abilities with your right arm, that is not important. What's important is the cancer. We don't want the cancer to take care. And it was true. I had some more serious issues in this human body that I had to be faced with and dealt dealt with post all the other chaos. And I I forget that sometimes because I try to let go of the difficult parts sometimes post my accident, like the cancer, huh? And I laugh or I giggle or I forget, which again, it's given me hope within my existence for cancer, you know? Okay, good. We got we got that. We took care of that one. And I hope it doesn't come back. I mean, I've had another checkup yearly and it's still all supposedly gone, and I'm recovered from that part of my trauma, I believe, but I have to stay open that you know it's still cancer and it's not easy to get on the other end of, no matter what. So I'm in a good spot now.

SPEAKER_06 46:11

You mentioned something that is really key though, whether it's an accident or whatever it is people are dealing with, it doesn't mean something else can't happen to us. Nope. I think a lot of people think they experienced one illness or one ailment or one whatever, and that's it for even a little bit. But it you're the prime example that that's not necessarily the case.

SPEAKER_03 46:39

Just don't believe in the idea that you've learned enough, that you've grown enough, that you can't be hurt more. Like all of the layers of your life, positive and negative, is to teach you. And none of us know what we're still learning in this lifetime. I mean, we go through it and we do the best we can. And we, I think on a daily basis, can try to make a decision to create and expand and be, I don't know, full of abundance. Like it just that's a choice. I could sit in sorrow about all of the chaos, I could sit in sorrow about all the brokenness, all the new parts and pieces, like you know, new hips, new, new, new this, new that, new, and taking away things, the cancer. A lot has happened physically to my body, but I spiritually know that I have so much to share about how to transform your life, trauma to triumph, whatever version that is for you. That's my goal in my new life, is is to help guide people to a better place.

SPEAKER_06 47:58

That's beautiful. I'm curious, and I'm sure you have had a lot of these, but I'm curious what you would consider your biggest, the biggest aha you've had in your life or your second life.

SPEAKER_03 48:14

I think the true understanding of staying present brings abundance, is like I know those are probably silly words, but like it's so hard to stay present. It's so so hard to to not work on next steps or the previous steps. And for me, just there's just so much beauty in your life if you can just stay present. That is, I think it's it's not an easy thing to do. There's simple words, but it's not easy to do. And yeah, I'm gonna ask you right now, give me one word that comes to you in this present moment. One word, any word. Now. Now with staying present. And there's a blend with that. Like that means that you truly are capable of staying present. Okay, that's good. Yeah, it is. I mean, but it's not easy, and you need to consistently do it because it it's not like it comes, you know, but you in this moment, you could stay present with me. Yeah, I could.

SPEAKER_06 49:37

Yeah. Really enjoyed this, Shannon. Yeah, it's been nice talking to you as well. Have you heard of a man named Jay Shetty? Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_03 49:51

This is life. I am not joking. Yes, I have. I have actually a conversation with one person on his team tomorrow about I'm not sure what next, but yes, I know him. Why do you ask that? Are you gonna be doing life coaching with him? Or are you meeting him? I don't know. I have no idea of the expansion of my life. I just know that I'm having this conversation with somebody on his team tomorrow. And you can ask me in a few days, you can ask me what happened. It was a part of this new road I'm traveling down for some reason. And the fact that you just said his name is just making me laugh. And it just again with abundance, I know that there's something major in my life that keeps doing these layers and layers of expanding and giving.

Rapid-Fire Wisdom On Legacy

SPEAKER_06 50:48

So obviously, you know he's got a podcast called On Purpose. I'm a big fan, and he ends it with two segments, and I've borrowed those two segments, and I end my show with them as well. But they're not my questions. So I give him credit because people always want to know how did you come up with the they are word for word what Jay Shetty says. So it's not my question.

SPEAKER_03 51:12

Oh, listen, I'll see if I have an answer for you.

SPEAKER_06 51:17

The first segment is the many sides to us, and they can be answered in one word each. What is one word someone who was meeting you for the first time, which used to describe you as? Explosive. What is one word someone who knows you extremely well, which used to describe you as? Enlightened. What is one word you'd use to describe yourself?

SPEAKER_02 51:51

Abundance.

SPEAKER_06 51:54

I guess it's just What is one word that if someone didn't like you or agree with your mindset would use to describe you as? Kind. What is one word you're trying to embody right now? Breath. Second segment is the final five, and these can be answered in up to a sentence. What is the best advice you've heard or received? You're the best you you can be.

SPEAKER_02 52:34

Why is that why is that the best?

SPEAKER_03 52:37

Because within this new life of mind, I have to keep remembering how worthy I am and how much I can connect with others in ways that are hard to explain, but they're very spiritual, and I get a lot of connections and insight through me when I'm speaking to somebody or with somebody.

SPEAKER_02 53:15

What is the worst advice you've heard or received? Wow.

SPEAKER_03 53:47

I don't think of them as anything but a positive guidance. So I I don't have an answer for that one. I mean, that's my answer. Nothing. No, because I feel like I think we are our own worst enemy. I think we are our own worst critic. I think we are the most challenging to ourselves. So when you ask that what somebody else has done or said, it's nothing. I just have to remember to be kinder to myself. Like I'm the one that has to remember to be kinder to myself. I'm the one that has to have the softer responses to where I'm at in my life with recovery, with my body, my brain, with my whatever. I'd have to be kind to myself. And some days I am, and some days I'm not. And I think that's human. I don't think that's more than human.

SPEAKER_06 54:43

But you don't think you've ever gotten any bad advice or advice that you considered bad?

SPEAKER_02 54:50

Nothing's coming to me, but um, give me a second. I've had such good guidance.

SPEAKER_03 55:00

I don't know. It's okay if you don't have anything. I mean, I seriously don't. You could ask me again in a few days, and I might have an answer because I'll sit with it for a while. But I have not, I have just had so much support and love considering, and again, I don't have to say considering, but just in my life post-my accident, there's just been such beautiful strength and kindness and guiding and support. Fills my heart. Like, even oh, okay, this comes to me. Some people had to, I would say, exit my life because they couldn't find a right place for themselves within it. And I there's a few friends that are so distant from me now that I think sad as a loss. And even within that, like nothing was said to me in a way that was hurtful or painful, or I couldn't understand, or I couldn't grow from. And so I'm not sure. But I don't also, I like you say that, and I don't think that negativity or extremism in certain ways toward you. To me, that's always like guidance. Like, what is that telling you? What is that teaching you? What can you learn from that moment instead of taking it in a hurtful way or a painful way? That you take it and you can grow and learn from it. Not that you have to accept it, because some stuff is just bullshit, but you know, there isn't. I still I'm sitting here with nothing for you.

SPEAKER_06 56:44

No worries. What is something that you used to value that you no longer value?

SPEAKER_03 56:52

I used to value my physical ability to do certain things like snowbore, ride my motorcycle. There's some physical things that I can't do anymore or haven't tried to do again that feel like it's a loss or a change in my life. I also had to refind myself. I was very lost, you know, and I had to I needed to find her again. I needed to dig in, and as my neurologist says, who I love, he's like, it's all still in there, Shannon. Just take it out.

SPEAKER_06 57:37

So yeah. If you could describe what you would want your legacy to be, as if someone was reading it, what would you want it to say?

SPEAKER_02 57:48

That's a good one. That's a good one.

SPEAKER_03 57:52

Um I know I will be remembered as a thriving survivor of trauma. And there are again not a lot of words you can put around describing me at this stage and or once I have passed. But there will be there will be a lot of people sharing how I helped change their life and inspired them. That will be a part of what the stories will tell.

SPEAKER_06 58:56

If you could create one law in the world that everyone had to follow, what would it be? And I wonder why.

SPEAKER_03 59:05

You said one r rule? One law. The simplicity of my answer is again going to be what it is. It's very simple and not easy to stay on. And that is accepting accepting and learning and growing from staying present. If people could learn, and that was a law. It sounds again, it sounds so simple, but it's not easy. I don't ever want to think of it as a law. I just want to think of it as an intent for people to live through doing that.

SPEAKER_06 59:53

Why would that be what you choose for the law?

Closing And How To Connect

SPEAKER_03 59:58

Because I believe that that only brings growth from what you learn in you, who you are, and that abundance, that kindness, that softness that you have with yourself by staying present, it changes you in a way that is it's almost like a speed limit. Like, can you actually just stay present and just be aware of this moment for you? And people would be able to view each other and their lives themselves in a different way if they could not hang on so much to the past or sit hang on so much to the to the present of what they could achieve, but just where they're at right now. That yin and yang of being just here and not here and here, that that is super empowering. I think I know it helped me. And I know it's so because I know that sometimes when I get frustrated or overwhelmed or sad about something, I have to remind myself of what I've been through and what I've achieved, and how this new person is again, she's a she's a strength beyond what I can explain. She's got so much to give, and I have so much that I want to share with others to help others. That's my goal. How can I help the world, the universe? How can I be of much giving and kindness and in a beautiful way where people really see themselves in a present moment and then they will learn to achieve more within that point, just that point. Keep hearing my dog Teddy. That's beautiful, Shannon. Well, thank you so much. You thank you, and definitely if anybody gets a chance, I have a beautiful website and take a peek and expanding and growing that as well is it's pretty cool. You can buy my book on it, but they're also just in the midst of all kinds of new stuff, which will also take a peek when you have a chance. Step into your miracle.com.

SPEAKER_06 1:02:17

And I will link that in the show notes for everybody to click directly. Thank you so much, Janan. I really appreciate it. Thank you. Absolutely. And thank you guys for tuning in to another episode of Me News Mindset.

SPEAKER_05 1:02:36

In case no one told you today, I'm proud of you. I'm voting for you. And you got this. As always, if you enjoyed the show, I would really appreciate it if you would leave me a five-star rating. Leave a review, and share with anyone you think would benefit from that. And don't forget, you are only one mindset shift away from shifting your legs. Thanks guys, until next time.