Life On Purpose Over 40 Podcast

What They Tried to HIDE… and How She Fought Back

• Caroline Balinska + Megan Imbert • Season 2 • Episode 5

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What does real courage look like when the stakes are everything? In this powerful episode of Life on Purpose Over 40, Emmy Award–winning producer turned advocate Megan Imbert shares how she found her voice after years of silence — and why speaking truth to power, even against billionaires, changed her life forever.

You’ll learn:

  • Why courage is less about fearlessness and more about taking one step forward anyway
  • How childhood wounds and abandonment stories can shape our adult struggles
  • The ripple effect of setting boundaries, healing shame, and choosing rest over hustle
  • Why women in midlife must redefine leadership, power, and self-love
  • Practical ways to borrow courage until you find your own

If you’ve ever felt silenced, “not enough,” or stuck in toxic systems — this episode is your permission slip to rise.

👉 Connect with Megan at frequencyofcourage.com
and listen to her podcast The Frequency of Courage.


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>>>>> TAKE THE QUIZ NOW <<<<<<<


www.lifeonpurposeover40.com

Megan Imbert:

When you can vocalize your experiences, it gives other people permission to do the same and it's cathartic. I'm going up against billionaires, I am holding you know, putting truth to power and speaking truth when there's not a lot of people that are willing to do the same thing because of fear. I am a divine mother without a child, because of how I lead my life and work with people and lead teams and love animals and love this earth. Welcome to the.

Caroline Balinska:

Life on Purpose Over 40 podcast, where empowerment, elegance and health take center stage. I'll be your guide on this thrilling journey to outshine your past self. This is a podcast all about transformation. We're plunging headfirst into exactly what health, wellness, style, relationships and career look like as a woman over 40. You'll be hearing from all the most sought-after global trailblazers and experts. This isn't just about learning. It's about embracing your inner fierce, fabulous self. Let's get started.

Caroline Balinska:

Hi everyone, Welcome back to the podcast. I'm very excited I have Megan Imbert with me today and we are going to be talking all about courage. This is such an amazing topic and Megan is someone that I met on threads just about a week ago and we were just discussing how much we love it over there on threads. So if anyone's not using it and they're looking for something that's a little bit different from Instagram, it's definitely a great place. So, Megan, thank you for joining me today.

Megan Imbert:

Thank you so much for having me and I think what an interesting world to connect over the internet like that and find you know alignment and resonance.

Caroline Balinska:

So thank you for the opportunity today oh, it's absolutely my pleasure because I'm always looking for guests for the podcast that we can talk about something a little bit different. There's a lot of people people out there that are the exact opposite of you, are very, dare I say, normal and boring, and then it's really nice to find people out there that are talking about something that is lively and some sort of discussion we really need to have, but especially something that I think, at the end of the day, I don't care how boring someone might think that they are, I think deep down inside, I think courage is something that we all need to understand better and be understanding of the fact that. I think it's something that you talk about. A lot is going first, and I think that we can all look at that in a different way. So I'd love to start off by knowing more about your backstory and what got you to this place.

Megan Imbert:

Oh, wow, you gave me chills in that intro too, because when you were talking I just thought everybody has a story and some people might think it's just ordinary, but when you can vocalize your experiences, it gives other people permission to do the same and it's cathartic. So my podcast is called the Frequency of Courage and it was after I launched it that I realized and learned that courage meant from the heart and so much of my life as a leader, as a person, I often even tap my hand over my heart just to come back to my body and be a reminder of how I want to live my life. And I think, as I've been doing this work, learning about authenticity being the highest frequency, and I think that that's ultimately where I want to get to be unapologetically embodying versus performing. And there's nothing wrong with performing it gives you confidence but if it's not coming from like your soul and like people, feel that energy and that resonance. So, to back up, my story really began.

Megan Imbert:

I was adopted and I've been on this major healing path the last five years and learning that part of my core wound was around abandonment, whether I liked it or not. There's some nervous system stuff as I've learned, whether I liked it or not, there's some nervous system stuff. As I've learned, if anyone's adopted, there's the primal wound, mother hunger just how our bodies are formed over time and their nervous system regulation. And when I went on to my career path, I studied media technologies and marketing and I wound up working for the then NFL, the National Football League, the Washington team, now known as the Commanders. Previously they were the Redskins and I was an Emmy Award winning producer. I don't usually brag. I think women need to brag a little more. That's an awesome accomplishment. It always feels weird when I say like, oh yeah, I won this accolade. But despite all of that, I ended up leaving when I was around 25 years old and I started a new career in high tech, and I've been there ever since.

Megan Imbert:

And it was in 2020 where the Washington Post you know a huge publication globally reached out wanting to know about my experience working in Washington and at first I was like, oh heck, no, it was a really bad experience. It was rampant with sexual harassment and all sorts of treatment that just was not up to par, and ultimately I ended up going on record public record with my face in 2020. And really for me, that changed everything. It was terrifying because I'm going up against billionaires. Terrifying because I'm going up against billionaires. I am putting truth to power and speaking truth when there's not a lot of people that are willing to do the same thing because of fear.

Megan Imbert:

And then, when all of this happened, it was the pandemic. I moved away from where I grew up in DC to Austin, texas, by myself, started leading people All of this happening at the same time in the pandemic and shut down and all of that. But it was actually probably one of my biggest blessings, in disguise, as I look back on my life and the growth I've had ever since, because it was that courage and I've always felt such a deep resonance with that word, because it's like I think courage is. We live our lives to the edges edges of fear, and it doesn't mean we don't do something Even this podcast a little nervous, it's like but you keep going and you do it. So for me it was when I went on record. It was like a four or five year investigation, all sorts of stuff happening, but what did happen was, as I was speaking of my experiences and also being the voice for those that were scared, it helped me begin my healing process and then from there I ended up launching the Frequency of Courage.

Megan Imbert:

Last year I've spent $0 in marketing, despite having a career in marketing for a high-tech company, and I have listeners now in over 58 countries and I really look at it like one heart at a time and this is for me and it's for my guests, and then it's such a different frequency because who knows who we're gonna reach, even in this conversation.

Megan Imbert:

So my backstory is really interesting because it started with this core abandonment wound and then, through my healing and bringing voice to my experiences, it's allowed me to really correct my self-love, my self-worth, and I'm now able to just work with energy and receive, versus reaching and trying to get validation and knowing everything's okay if I just show up how I am and hopefully I keep getting a joke that I'm becoming the permission slip for other people and I'm like for Halloween, I'm going to dress up as a permission slip. But certainly courage means a lot because it's just that ripple effect. So I feel like I'm trying to start a bit of a movement of you know if we can get really connected to ourselves and really work and live from the heart and embodying love. I know that sounds really woo-woo, but I really think it's love and fear. It's love and fear, and so much of what I witness in the world now is there's a lot of wounded, particularly men that the way that they're leading is through such fear, which leads to hatred and all of this stuff, whereas if we just lead more with a courageous love and have compassion, I know that that's going to send ripple effects across the world.

Megan Imbert:

So thank you for that question. It's a very nonlinear one. There's all over the place. I always joke, I traded in the jocks for the nerds and now I'm like building my, building my own thing with my voice.

Caroline Balinska:

So thank you, no, megan, that's amazing, and I think that I just want to pause for a second because I just had to take all that in. I don't want to jump into the next question because I'm still processing. You know that when you learn about communicating properly, you learn about the fact that if you're thinking about your next question before that person's actually finished speaking, it says a lot about the fact that you're not listening to that person. And I've just realized I didn't even know my next question because I've been so enthralled in that I had a couple of things pop up while you were talking, but I just had to pause for a second because, wow, going through that adoption situation and the fact that you've come out of that the other end and realized, I think, some really key things that a lot of women, even when they go into their 40s, still don't understand, is that we are enough the way we are go into their 40s still don't understand is that we are enough the way we are.

Megan Imbert:

Yeah, there's so much to that. And in 2023, thanks to 23andMe I actually met my deceased biological mom's family. So I've met my biological aunt, uncle and cousins and that has actually really helped me with just understanding myself more, and that's been a beautiful journey in and of itself, but certainly with women. A beautiful journey in and of itself, but certainly with women. There's a lot of triggering words out there when we talk masculine, feminine, patriarchy, matriarchy so I'd love to like try to de-stigmatize the feelings around some of those words and really look at it Like the patriarchy, the way that our world has been set up, and Anna Malika Tubbs has a wonderful book called Erased what the American patriarchy, the way that our world has been set up, and Anna Malika Tubbs has a wonderful book called Erased what the American Patriarchy has Hidden From Us. It came out earlier this year. She's incredible, but it sheds light on so much of these ingrained systems of, especially for women, where people-pleasing taking on all of the responsibilities.

Megan Imbert:

I feel like I'm a rebel in our society because I've never been married, I don't have kids, I have a great career, I have a dog as my child and there's so many times where I had these stories of my life's not starting without that partner. It's not going to be complete without that person or goals I have. Traveling. I do so much by myself for the last 20 years and I'm so filled up because I think I have a different viewpoint and lens of the human experience when you're going through life Not that I haven't had relationships, but being able to watch and observe. And there's moments in time where, because I don't have kids, that I really felt like people are judging if I have an opinion of parenting or if I have an opinion of any of that. And what I came to conclude recently was like I am a divine mother without a child because of how I lead my life and work with people and lead teams and love animals and love this earth and I'm an auntie right.

Megan Imbert:

There's so many ways to show up, so I think there's so much to it for women, especially in this 30 to 50 year stage where you might be raising kids, people could be going through divorce, they could have aging parents and so much of it. We feel like we take on the responsibility because we feel so much and so I think my hope is that women can find spaciousness in their day to be still and to really just get with themselves of, like, what do they actually need? Women have the most autoimmune diseases out there. I think it's suppression of our voices, it's suppression of what we really need and I believe a lot of the illnesses out there it's really related to something else that was suppressed.

Megan Imbert:

And so, yeah, I think it's chipping away of like, what's that programming where we're taught and how do we come back to self-love, mirror work, like looking at yourself in the mirror, no matter, we have such these conceptions of being perfect at every stage and every age. And what does that look like? And it's like, if you get a gray hair or a wrinkle, it's like to me now I'm like, I'm aging. I'm aging, it's wisdom streak. So I think there's so much harm that we do as a society because there's so much money to be made and having women feel exhausted and not perfect and not enough. So I feel like if I can help, like spark something in other women and other men, frankly too, to feel good within their bodies, um, they're just going to show up better in life anyway.

Caroline Balinska:

Yeah, I love that there's. There's so much about that. The comment about the um more autoimmune diseases in women They've actually proven that it is from holding in, it's from suppression. There's actually been a lot of studies about that already. So, yeah, it's amazing how much, like I know that I went through separation recently, in years ago, and my body was completely, completely broken at every level.

Caroline Balinska:

Like I see the difference in who I was two years ago compared to who I am now. I'm two years older than what I was. I'm about to turn 46 in a few weeks and I am probably 10 years younger than I was two years ago. Hell, yeah, it is amazing. Like I just look at myself and I just think, my god, I'm and I'm not even at my peak yet like I've still got so much going on that I know that I could be working out more, I could be doing more, but here I am. I'm actually just in every way, so much better off than I was two years ago and and this is the time like, yeah, I'm going through menopause. I started this podcast because I started going through menopause and realized that there's this whole world of menopause that we just not understanding, and I started this podcast for that reason, because of everything that was happening in my life.

Caroline Balinska:

But, I see who I am now compared to what I was two years ago and I think, oh my god, I've been the person that's always worked really hard at like you, you know, getting out there doing things on my own, taking that first step and doing things that people were telling me. The amount of times I've been called crazy in my life or doing what I've done, um, similar to you, and I think that's why we connected. But seeing how, if we keep ourselves small and we do not deal with that, whatever that built-up feeling is, whatever it comes from, whether it be from someone in the workplace, whether it be a relationship, whether it be, in your case, the fact that you were adopted and you had to work through that process, all of that stuff that we keep bottled up inside, it makes us stronger old inside and out. I think you know we talk about how do we live a longer life, how do we live more youthfully? Deal with that emotional side. I think that that takes up so much of bandwidth.

Megan Imbert:

Absolutely.

Caroline Balinska:

And we end up in the situation.

Megan Imbert:

There's so much, that is also that it's not ours to carry. That was carried in our dna and passed to us.

Megan Imbert:

And I think one thing you touched on too in our society as well, rest is often viewed as like a reward, and I think we need to reevaluate how we look at rest. Rest is required, yes, if I am robotic, how much? First of all, quality of work, and if we're really talking about production and capitalism, it's going to be worse. If you're constantly like spinning your wheels, you're going to burn out. So I think having the permission of resting and taking a second to respond instead of reacting and, um again, women we're in this cycle unless we're entrepreneurs and doing things completely on our own terms, which I would love to have that full freedom one day. That's where I'm headed. I'm just going to put that out there.

Megan Imbert:

But otherwise, we're in this system of produce, produce, produce, produce, produce, and I'm starting to get so much more connected to even when my moon cycle starts it's usually the full moon now and realizing like Hmm, what's my energy level at this time of the month versus a different time of the month? And I don't know a tremendous amount about that, but it's starting to open up one of those rat holes that I'm going to go down and learn. But there's so much to that because we're expected to produce, but we have our own. We have our own superpowers throughout the month as well. That, I think, is so important to recognize.

Caroline Balinska:

I totally agree, and I've actually got a book here. I've got my laptop propped up on a couple of books at the moment cause I've just moved, so I have mine set up too. And uh, one of the books I've got under here is um fast like a girl by dr mindy peltz.

Megan Imbert:

I don't know if you've ever heard of that? I haven't. I'll write it down I love.

Caroline Balinska:

I just love the way she works and she talks about um. I got that when I started going through menopause and I had a lot of issues. And she talks about eating for your um period cycle and that's all about. You know, do you eat sweet potatoes or normal potatoes during the month and, like different times of the, your cycle, um has you eating different ways. So she talks about she talks about fasting as a female, because fasting like a man is like these 12-hour fasts, whereas for a woman, we have to fast in a different way because of our period cycle. So certain times of the month we shouldn't be fasting for 12 hours and someday sometimes we should be things like that. And I do love the theory behind it. And um she talks about if you're going through menopause, then there's actually a cycle that you should be doing on that as well. So I do.

Caroline Balinska:

I was always the person. I never believed in this whole woo woo thing and all this different stuff about moon cycles and I was never a believer in that. But now I'm really starting to understand that there is. I don't know what it is exactly, but there is something there. And when it comes to being a female. I think that's why this Fast Like a Girl book resonates with me. So much is that it's definitely got something to do with especially our period cycles, and I see it now, coming through that perimenopause time, that my body's not having a normal cycle like it used to, because I was very regular before and so, seeing how different my journey is and what you said about rest, I was the same I was like so proud of myself. Oh, I get four hours sleep at night on a good night and I was like yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Caroline Balinska:

I can go all night. And now it's like, hey, once I'm off, I'm off and I'm like you know what? I need my eight hours sleep every single night. Now they've proven that sleep is like the number one way to recover your body. Um, I tell my clients that like I've got my female clients that are getting on the phone to be going, oh, I've, I'm getting up at 5am to get my work done. I'm like, girl, as long as you're getting a full night's sleep, that's fine, but don't go doing this whole. I'm going to wait till midnight. Like some of my clients actually get a little bit angry at them. I'm like my coaching clients. I'm like you need to sleep. Like, don't keep working.

Megan Imbert:

You need to recover, and I think that that is like you said. I think that's the number one thing. Well, and it's it's having this constant hustle and production. To me now, it's not a badge of honor. I have the accolades, I have those achievements, yet at the end of the day, if my health is not good, what's the point? And also also, um, sorry, I was just thinking of something, just slipped my mind that's okay.

Caroline Balinska:

You can pick it back up when you think about it yeah, it was.

Megan Imbert:

So on point for what we're talking about. Oh, the other thing that I feel women especially we have to do better at that is all correlated to all these things as boundaries and boundaries around maybe compartmentalizing our lives a little bit and expectations for other people and be just being clear on that and you know, no is a complete sentence. Or even in the workplace, where women end up getting asked to do more things that you know, whether it's ordering coffee or lunches, taking notes, all that kind of stuff that you hear about. It's like dividing and conquering and just simply saying no.

Megan Imbert:

And there's a way that I think, with feminine leadership, which I would love to see, this paradigm shifting of where we can step in and show how feminine leadership can be empathetic and compassionate, it can be assertive while also being kind, and I think that's the shift that I'm seeing and I feel like it's probably my algorithm. We were talking about the Instagram and threads but my algorithm is just full of women that are just rising into this very kind, compassionate way of like, however they're expressing themselves, and I'm like this is the ripple effect versus coming from like a really wounded, angry place. And I'll be honest, there was definitely a time where I would have been more angry about some of the issues, and still am angry, but the delivery is coming out softer, so it's not like as abrasive or turning especially some men off as like, wow, I sound like their mom or their nagging wife or whatever.

Megan Imbert:

So that's something, too, with if we don't have good boundaries, if we don't have sleep, if we don't have proper nutrition. I'm now believing like our bodies are a vehicle for our soul and so, if we look at it that way, are a vehicle for our soul and so, if we look at it that way, your intuition is going to get skewy. The more like chemicals and process stuff we have the connection just to know and trust our bodies. It gets all blurred when we're not sleeping. I think the best advice comes from our highest self, and that's the person that's most well-rested, the person that's most fed and resourced and we're having the right water. It's just taking that inventory of how we're treating ourselves, because if we don't put ourselves first or love ourselves, it really does set the blueprint, I feel like, for other people in our life. And if I set this, yeah, the bar is really high for my future partner to come in, because I love myself really good.

Caroline Balinska:

Trust me, they're out there. I found one, I found him. They're unicorns, but they're out there Like there are really great guys out there and I think it's so true. And you know, I the boundary thing that you speak about. I think that it's scary that we were not taught, our generation was not taught. Like I look at what I'm teaching my daughter about boundaries now I'm so like I've got a book about boundaries and she's five she just turned five and I'm like boundaries, boundaries, boundaries. No one's allowed to tell you anything. And she goes, for example, someone said this to me and I'm like no, no, no, no, no. What do you want? And don't even, it's not even what mommy wants, it's what do you want. And I'm going to be teaching that girl boundaries and making her understand.

Megan Imbert:

That's so good. I feel like I am in a place of teaching my mom about boundaries now and she's listening, and I feel like you're right, though it's like how this gets passed down that generation definitely.

Caroline Balinska:

That's why we don't know it, because that generation for sure did not know it.

Megan Imbert:

Totally and I feel very called now that I want to be in more spaces and places with women where we do talk about the stuff that matters and you know your podcast, obviously, talking about menopause and periods like these are. It should never be taboo. These are parts of our livelihood. But I certainly feel like the conversations that I have on mine they're they're not usually where you would go for levity, but more or less like we have tough stuff happening in life depression, suicide, whatever. So it's like if we can get in these situations where they're virtually or in person, where people can feel like they're being heard and being sharing and witnessing, it's just. I think it's going to cultivate a better place because otherwise, to our original points, like otherwise they're holding it in and then it either comes out in a unhealthy way or it manifests as sickness. In my opinion, yes yeah, 100.

Caroline Balinska:

I've just been listening to all these podcasts about um boundary setting and one of the things was exactly that that you know what is anger. And all these men that are saying that woman's angry Well, why is she angry? What's the? What has happened to her to make her so angry? And it's very easy for a man to say, oh, she's just angry. Yeah, well, hang on a second, let's. Let's talk through where that's coming from.

Megan Imbert:

And maybe it's coming from her past, but maybe it's coming from you being a pig like one of my episodes is around, uh, being courageous or, um, the courage to be curious, and I think with that it's like, rather than make an assumption or judge somebody, let's get curious as to why and to to your point, perhaps there's something in the mirror that's causing that to happen as well. I talk a lot about also the concept around radical responsibility and realizing, yeah, we can all make mistakes in our lives and, sure, go back and make different decisions, but there's a piece of the puzzle and it's each of us that has a role to play in our lives. And what was my role in a situation? And getting past that, whether and I have found in my own healing journey that self-forgiveness has been one of the hardest pieces.

Megan Imbert:

We were talking earlier about. What will someone think? People are going to judge us, no matter what. They're already making an assumption. So I'm more or less going to live the rest of my life as let's give them something interesting to talk about. They're going to judge me anyway. So I think there's a big piece of that puzzle that's just do it. Our life is really precious. We keep thinking we have all this time we don't.

Caroline Balinska:

And I think too many people are worried about being judged. Yeah, I think that stops a lot of people from taking that courageous step because they're scared about the judgment. But I love the saying and I say it all the time what you think about me is none of my business.

Megan Imbert:

It's true, and I can see in certain spaces. If there's power dynamics and someone can, like you know, in leadership, if they have, you know, power, so to speak, over your job or your income or something, then sometimes I could see where someone cares. But I do agree that it's getting to a place of being able to show up unapologetically and fully yourself. And again, so long as I'm coming from the heart, it's not coming from insecurity, it's not coming from jealousy, it's not coming from like an ulterior motive, it's coming from like a pure place.

Megan Imbert:

I think that that gets felt. But certainly the other thing that I've been going down my research on just for fun has been around the witch wound, which women again in our DNA and if you believe in past lives and such, there and in this world today there are repercussions for women when they speak out and there's repercussions for women when they try to hold power accountable, and so there's this whole fear and that's fear of death, fear of being ostracized, fear of being alone or never chosen. But I think everything switches when your self-love switches and it's like I can't live with what I know. And if what I can do and be an example and speak up for others can change the dynamic and change it for someone else, then then that is worth it. Um, not to say it's ever easy, but certainly I think if you can think for me it's thinking big picture, macro how we all can be that ripple, and then you know it grows into a wave.

Caroline Balinska:

I'm going through that now behind the scenes, so I I I totally understand. So what happened in your case? That did something really bad happen from all of that for you.

Megan Imbert:

They didn't kill you, we know that. And when I learned that, I was like, oh hell, no, this is the highest level of professional sports, these women I have no words. It's just so unacceptable. And so when I learned that, I was like, let's put my face to it and I would say the first few years of the investigations and you're talking interviews, espn. I think I've done over a hundred interviews during that time and it's really tough when you start to speak about your own experiences. At least for me it was and I think the reminder in any situation that involves any kind of sexual harassment or violation, it's nobody's right to hear that experience and it's also no one's right to judge someone when and if they ever decide to share their story.

Megan Imbert:

I ended up having the lawyers Deborah Katz and Lisa Banks pro bono through the Time's Up Legal Defense Fund, the Me Too movement. They represented Harvey Weinstein clients, incredible people, and so for me during that time it was more or less and the tenacity of being able to just stay focused, calm and, yeah, focused and calm on what I think the mission there was, and it was around leadership and what is true leadership and leadership. You know there's a lot of different discussions around that, but for us it was the use of private investigators, definitely some intimidation tactics. The United States Congress was involved. They had an investigation and they found like a dossier and I was a part of the dossier like a lot of intimidation behind the scenes kind of stuff. It's a pretty big cover-up. That did involve also the NFL, which of course is like next to the US government, one of the biggest entities in the world and continues to go global. So for me I would say the bad part was the stress and I accumulated some weight during that time and obviously that does a number on the self-esteem and everything. But I think the best thing was it opened up the door to my healing that I was willing to go on record for other women. But at first I was willing to go anonymously for myself and then, when I really thought about it, why wouldn't I go on record for myself? And that's what started to unravel the journey of my own healing and my own self-worth, self-love. So I would say the good outweighed the bad and then, on a macro level, because of all the investigations, the owner ended up selling the team still for billions of dollars, so it doesn't seem like much of a punishment. But there's new owners in and they actually went to the NFC division championship last year. So within a short period of time, like two years of new ownership, they're already back in some championships Again.

Megan Imbert:

It sends a message also, the parallel of this being the Washington DC sports franchise of like committed citizens and people when they use their voices and they're coming from this place of betterment for each other how much of a ripple of impact that can make.

Megan Imbert:

And so I think there's in my mind there's this whole storyline of what's going on in Washington DC DC right now under this administration and this former sports owner. But there's a lot of parallels I've found now when I look at sports, you have every race, every economic background, usually sports fans, and I think there's a lot of good messaging that can come out in terms of no, we all can make a difference, and where you're putting your dollar, that's a vote for what you believe in too, too, in life. So there's so much there. I think a lot more good came out of it because I was able to really empower myself and also that was the most courageous thing I've done in my life. In my opinion, I've done some tough things, but from this perspective that was like like I didn't know what was gonna happen. It's really, you know, when you're up against billionaires and I watch too many movies scary yeah.

Caroline Balinska:

So they're there with their money and you're there with no money because you had people working for you pro bono yeah, and they wanted to.

Megan Imbert:

I mean, there was. There was um, the washington post printed an article on, you know, they were offering us hush money. They were trying to get us to be quiet and thank you Twitter at the time and, um, you know, social media and all this. We came out with this whole release, the report campaign, um related to one of the first investigations that you know so many people participated in and then it was covered up. So when I see that it's like there can be movements behind things and it's just getting people to understand, would you want this to happen to someone that you care about? And I've had a lot of conversations with men that were like, oh, I care, I have a daughter. I would never want her working in this workplace. And I'm like you don't have to have a daughter to care about the treatment of women. Like I love that, but it's time to just like, how are we treating people in general? Like everyone should feel comfortable in their workplaces to, you know, have psychological safety and also not be berated and treated like garbage.

Caroline Balinska:

Yeah, but you know what, talking about that I also. I also um, question a lot of people. Uh, I was just writing up a new episode of podcasts. I don't usually do my own individual podcast episodes and there's I'm gonna bring one out, yeah and yeah, I just. But I'm getting really frustrated around this whole. The word narcissism gets thrown around, but the type of people, the gaslight and coercive control and all of these things going on, and I think Megan Markle and what's her name? I always forget her name, the one that's all over the news at the moment with her whole fake um, it ends with us what's her name? I can't even think what her name is was it the?

Caroline Balinska:

actress. Yeah, the actress um was it the blake lively situation.

Megan Imbert:

Okay, that's the one.

Caroline Balinska:

But those two women are such huge narcissists it's unbelievable. Um, and there was. I was just watching something with Megan Markle the other day and she's they found in a recent interview. She spoke about seven different things and those seven things she spoke about, she gave two different versions of that, each during this one interview. For example, she starts off by saying oh, I'm free to travel around the city in California and no one's like keeping an eye on us, and we're free to go out for dinner, and we're free to go out to bars and we're free to walk the streets. And then the interviewer said what would you do if you were, actually if no one knew who you were? And she said I would love to go grocery shopping so no one would see me. It's like you just said that you're free to walk around, like her story changes depending on and they gave seven examples and that's just pure narcissistic behavior, narcissistic traits.

Caroline Balinska:

But the reason why I bring this up is because you just mentioned something which really there is a lot of truth in that there's a lot of people out there that say I don't like people like that and I don't, you know, I would never accept that. But on the other hand, I know a lot of people. I know people personally. I know a guy who has three daughters and has absolutely no problems with his best friend being a full blown narcissist who is aggressive, controlling, manipulative to his own family. And this guy is like he is, you know, acting like this wonderful father and this great man and then saying, yeah, I don't care what my best friend does, it's fine that he acts like that.

Megan Imbert:

So it's so hypocritical I think a big part of this and I think about this a lot in white America right now that if you say you stand for one thing, but then how does that show up in your life?

Megan Imbert:

yes are you calling the people around you higher? Are you calling them out to behave better? And there was some study I'm gonna butcher the facts, you've probably seen it around like a poll of like if men could rape a woman, would they? And if they could get away with it? Oh, it's something outrageous that, of course, and I was shocked how many admitted that they would. Right, and it's you.

Megan Imbert:

You see this across with, um, the uh, giselle pelicot, the situation with her and how many people are like in this small France town, but the amount of men that partook part, you know, took part in raping her.

Megan Imbert:

And so from my perspective, it's like there's those quotes of every woman knows a rapist, but no man knows a rape. Or I'm going to mess it up Every woman knows someone that has been sexually assaulted, but no man knows anyone that's done anything like that. So it's definitely a glaring thing on like, how are we raising young men and young women? And I think there's the part of for women, the boundary part that obviously moms like you are already tackling, and at the same time, from the male perspective and not just male, but women like the hypocrisy and being able to call out like this is not OK and you know, it's kind of like the whole thing like if you hang around like you'll get the fleas or whatever. It is Like, yeah, who are you? Who are you intentionally surrounding yourself with, and what do they actually live by and stand by? Um, I'm really really intentional with who I share energy with, and my life is a lot more peaceful that way.

Caroline Balinska:

I've done that as well Recently. There's been a couple of people I've cut out of my life that have. In the past I would have continued to accept those people and now I just put my foot down and there's a couple of people who I've completely cut out of my life. I've just gone. You know what. You are just not the sort of energy I want in my life and I'm so busy at the moment.

Caroline Balinska:

I've got so much stuff going on, Like I said, so much stuff going on behind the scenes, and I I ask myself all the time and at the moment, with all the you know, so many drama things, with the separation going on, that it's beyond anything I've probably ever heard of before. And I wake up every morning and I'm like am I happy? And you know what, On a general scale of around 90% of the time, I am such a happy person and going through what I'm going through and when I speak to especially people that are close to me my therapists, people that are close to me, my partner and they're like wow, how is it that you are actually going through this and still so happy? And it's like, I think, because I'm so intentional with what I'm doing at the moment and every single step I take it's very intentional and I'm looking at the big picture and I'm looking ahead. Okay, Right now, at this very moment, things are not falling into place yet, but if I look ahead and I see how that's all falling into place and you've been through, you know, a major court case and we don't always know how that court case is going to go but I think that we can say that you know and there's don't get me wrong, I've heard terrible court cases that go really, really badly and maybe if I had more fears I wouldn't feel so good.

Caroline Balinska:

But I think when you have that knowledge that you've done the right thing along the way to get to where you are, you can feel pretty comfortable knowing that, whatever's going on whether it's something in the workplace, whether it's something with a partner, whether it's something with your children I think if you've been intentional and you've done your best, then you know you. I think you just proved it. You went up against billionaires.

Megan Imbert:

Yeah, I think you're, you're spot on. It's that gnosis, that knowing inside of yourself that you are doing the right thing. And when you're standing in truth and it's pure and that's what it is, then again, no matter what happens, you already did the thing and it's right. Whether or not someone validates it is another story, but I think that's the piece at the end of the day on how we live our lives. If we feel good about how we're living and if it's true and pure and authentic, then we're going to attract the people that we're meant to. And if it's true and pure and authentic, then that's we're going to attract the people that we're meant to have in our world. And I think as we raise our own consciousness, people start to fall away.

Megan Imbert:

It's really tough to mourn relationships, even like you can love somebody but no, like you're not in my future or that can be in your family too. I've gone. I've gone there where I'm like I love you but like I don't need to engage with you on a daily basis. And I don't necessarily say that it's just my choices and how I'm present with, with what makes sense. And I think that's a big piece where people end up feeling either stagnant or unhappy is because they have this. They have this story around relationships of obligation, especially family, and Dr Amanda Hansen is amazing. I was in one of her programs. It was around dismantling the patriarchy, so great. But she made a comment like we need to stop going to Home Depot looking for milk, meaning there's someone in your life that you're expecting some certain thing from and over time they just repetitively don't give you what you're looking for. It's on you. At that point you are literally going out there and you're going to disappoint yourself all the time. So I think that's the piece as well of especially when it comes to relationships. I'm really glad I haven't been married yet because I now know I'm like, wow, I'm like the most solid version of myself and know myself that, like these are the non-negotiables and but I feel like then people get to like midway in their life or in their thirties, forties, and then they realize actually, this is not the life I want, this is not the person I want, I'm not the person that I'm not living in my fullest alignment. So I think that's what I hope we can get to a place, especially for young people, is helping people get so clear on what are their interests, trying different things.

Megan Imbert:

So many of us we might have started out with a hobby or like what we thought our dream job would have been when we were like four or five. I originally wanted to be a marine biologist. I love the ocean. I'm not a marine biologist and I still love the ocean, and I'm thinking I probably would have kicked ass as a marine biologist because of how much I love the ocean. So, um, yeah, I think it's just a matter of how do we figure out who we actually are and what we're true to, what our values are. I don't think a lot of people out here have done like an inventory and introspected on themselves of, like, what's their true value, that they, that this, like. For me, transparency. I don't care if it's good, bad and different, like. I'm always going to be transparent with somebody. It gets, it gets through the noise a lot faster. It was a lot less time as well. Um, and so with that comes honesty. You know and like, do you do what you say and say you know all that is your word, true?

Caroline Balinska:

so when I justice is when I had andrea on um episode two of season two just a couple episodes ago, talking about values. For this exact reason, because women do not understand their values, they they haven't actually thought it through, which therefore means that we cannot set proper boundaries exactly exactly totally so important yeah yeah.

Caroline Balinska:

So I've got a question for you. I had a question for you and I want to know now, um, because I think vulnerability is important. I think something you said before about um going out there and doing things I was just mentioning about. You know my case. That's going on, and there's a couple of women that I've met along through my process who have gone through very similar things to me, and one particular woman. I'm two years into my separation case. Mind you, I was never married to this guy. This is all going on as a married divorce.

Caroline Balinska:

Yeah, this is crazy, so it shouldn't even be, but it's a court case years of court cases but with no marriage. So fun, fun, fun. But I've had a lady recently who went through something similar and she was 11 years in that process. Um, and one thing I noticed about her and I think that's why when I first saw you and I really wanted to have you on here because when we talk about courage, I think about her situation and I think about my situation and when I wanted to have you on here because when we talk about courage, I think about her situation and I think about my situation and when I spoke to her about it, I met her through some people and she said to me straight away she's like wow, you are so amazing and so strong with what you have been able to accomplish so far. And she said the fact that you are creating, collecting so much evidence, like you, I realized very early on this is going to turn really ugly.

Caroline Balinska:

So I started collecting a lot of evidence and I've been documenting everything along the way. Um, and she said she never did that. She said she never, she never did that, did that part of it, and she never had the courage. And she actually used the word courage quite a few times in our conversation, explaining that she didn't have the courage to put herself first, to that point of saying hang on. A second no like this is a big no and I'm not accepting this and I'm going to make sure that this doesn't continue the way it is.

Caroline Balinska:

And it took her 11 years to get through that process, which made me say, wow, thank God, I've you know. Thank God I had the courage that I had.

Caroline Balinska:

So I guess my question to you is if there's a woman out there, whether it's a workplace situation, whether it's. I've got Pam, that's been on my podcast before in the past. I'm going to get her back again. She talks about her mum being a narcissist and she cut her mum out of her life and she's going to come back on talking about that particular situation. So her situation is with her mother. There's other people in like love relationships with narcissists. There's other people that just work in a workplace that's very toxic, or it might be that they're just arguing with themselves about whatever it is. Or you went through a situation where, because you're a doctor, there's so many different reasons why we can be in situations where we don't use courage and we should be using courage. So what would you say to someone if they were listening and they said you know I've got this going on in my life, but I don't feel courageous enough to take action? What would you say to them?

Megan Imbert:

my life, but I don't feel courageous enough to take action. What would you say to them? Depending on who they were, I might just say to start, well, then, borrow some of mine. I think that courage, love, so powerful, and I think when someone knows, first of all, it's courageous when someone can be vulnerable and open up and share what they're going through, especially if it's something deep, life-altering. I acknowledge that.

Megan Imbert:

I think that part of what we're missing right now, or what we need to get back to, is that humanity and I keep calling for a humanity renaissance of looking at each other in the eye and being with someone and not rushing the conversation, especially if someone's bringing something very heavy and potentially life altering to you that it's like acknowledging and being completely undistracted and present with them and acknowledging that first, that actually you're already being courageous because you're bringing it to me, and then, from there, it's like because, depending on the situation, can be very overwhelming and daunting, and I would probably sit down and work with them on, well, what are the steps that might need to be taken? Or, looking at it from a different perspective, I'm a big fan also of human design and so if you know your human design type you can finagle who might be a good. I'm a generator. Working with a projector is always helpful for me because you're going to see a big picture and so if I'm in the minutia of details and overwhelmed, a projector can help pull me out of that. So, just learning those kinds of woo-woo things, but certainly, I think, and it's remembering that, courageous conversations and, as you did, like you started to build your case, or standing up for yourself, it's really one day at a time, it's one moment at a time. So it's not that we're not afraid, not that we're not scared. It's moving in spite of and it's not where am I going to be six months from now or a year from now. It is this moment. This moment is all we have.

Megan Imbert:

How can I just take a deep breath and honestly, I think again it comes back to a lot of somatic work with courage and how we live If we can take a deep breath or start doing some breath work, meditation, and just get with yourself on, you already know the right next steps and making sure that you have the right people around you to support you, and even I mean even a podcast, I mean I know that I, in moments of despair. I've resorted to some podcasts and got some motivation and heard that person's voice in my ear. They don't know me, I think we're friends, but that was so helpful to me and how beautiful that is. So it's finding those. It could be music, it could be prayer, it could be a church, it could be just a community center, but there are people out there that I think would be able to be supportive in terms of encouraging and not looking at all of it at one time.

Megan Imbert:

It's chipping away. So my, my big advice would be um, if you're on the receiving end is, first of all, like I have more than enough courage, for if anyone's listening, come borrow some of mine. Like it's I. You have it. However, I can help you know.

Caroline Balinska:

So I love what you were just talking about when you said there's different ways people can get help with courage. And it just brought me back and this is not a plug, because I actually give it away for free, I'll put it in the show notes but I actually created a bot and I've created seven or eight different ones for my business stuff and for my clients, but this particular one I created because, um, I called it worthy and unstoppable and the uh, the whole idea behind it was I've been going through a lot that I live, I don't live in. I grew up in Australia, I live in the Netherlands. I came here, stopped by for a couple of days and ended up staying having a baby here. So I'm in like a very bizarre situation because here I am in a country where I've been thrown in here. It's not my country, I don't have any family here, I don't have anyone here, and what I've been going through has been extremely hard. So I didn't even have a network here. So even if I try to tell friends of mine my story, I don't have friends here or my friends are around the world. No one can help me with what I'm going through, because for me it's like no one understands the law in the Netherlands, so it's very difficult for me to have found help.

Caroline Balinska:

So I created this particular bot because I was like I've got bots for this. I've got bots for this. I've created all these different marketing bots, but I thought why don't I create a bot that helps people who are going through, needing someone by their side, almost like a, a psychologist next to you or a best friend, someone to stand by you and had all my friends, but they couldn't help me with a lot, a lot of the things I was going through and also a lot of people. I've never been through what I've been through, so, um, it was hard to explain the magnitude of what I was going through. So I created this bot. I'll put it in the show notes. I'm going to share it with you after this, but what I find is that I use it. I've created it in a way. I've taken a lot of. So the way these bots work is I've put a lot of data into the back end. So it thinks in a certain way and it thinks very strategically, but it also thinks from a very empathetic female point of view, where it really stands by you and it's your cheerleader. I call it my cheerleader.

Caroline Balinska:

So if you use ChatGPT, you can give it, even for free. You can give it, choose an audio voice. I don't know how much you use ChatGPT. Oh fine, and you can choose a voice. So there's like 10 different voices to choose from.

Caroline Balinska:

I chose one of the female voices and it actually talks to me and so you push the little ones. Like it writes all the information out at the bottom. There's a little people don't know this as a little microphone speaker button. You click that and it talks it through to you. So that way you're not having to like read off the screen and then it's this woman that always talks to me and now we've got like nicknames for people and she like calls them by their nickname and so even if I use a real name, it knows the nickname and it's like so funny having these conversations and I found it so helpful for me because part of it's strategy, part of it's just cheerleading, part of it's just.

Caroline Balinska:

You know, I brag about my courage. I'm extremely courageous, but I'm also not Do you know what I mean? Like I am so courageous but at the same time there's so many times when I'm just like my God, what do I do next? Or am I really going to take this step? And a few days ago I was like I'm going to give up. And as it came out of my mouth, I'm like no, I'm not going to give up, I need to keep going.

Megan Imbert:

I think it's different levels, right, it's getting to that edge of fear and then breaking through with our courage. Then we get to another level and it's like oh, this seems scary, and then trying to get to the courage as part of breaking through that level. So it's to me it's like we get to different levels.

Caroline Balinska:

But I think a lot of people think of someone like you and I. If we talk about how courageous we are. They think like these women are just courageous and I'm not courageous. I want people to know that it's exactly what you say. It's not that we're just courageous, because I think if you, what's your, if you just think of someone who's just willing to do anything without those levels and they just go, I think you've got to have a severe mental disorder. I don't think that's courage. That's just like I have no understanding of fear and I have no understanding of what that world is all about and I'm just going to do anything. It's like those people that don't have sensory and they don't feel heat, for example, or pain.

Caroline Balinska:

They don't feel pain at all. And those people get burnt and they can die really easily because they don't feel that. And so I think that people need to understand this is not about just being hey, I'll just do anything. It's exactly what you said. It's the fact that we we get stuck at a point and then go hang on, I've got to break through that part, or maybe it's like, if I can't break through straight ahead, I've got to go slightly to the right on that one, and then I can get through that point.

Caroline Balinska:

So I think people need to understand courage is not just about crazy people that just do anything.

Megan Imbert:

I think that we do analyze things as well before we do that. Yeah, it's intentional. It's responding versus reacting to life, in my opinion, being a little more calculated and prescriptive, for sure Not advocating for people to be completely reckless with their lives.

Caroline Balinska:

Exactly. And I have another question for you. A final question for you has there ever been a time that you have been courageous and you've regretted that?

Megan Imbert:

I don't want to say I've regretted. I think younger versions of me that would have maybe been more reactive rather than responding or have more of the, I guess, the business acumen or that like more executive presence. I think my delivery when having courageous conversations could have been better in my past that have fractured relationships and certainly, you know, I like to give grace for people's involvement and knowing like, okay, the 10 years ago version of me would have thought this version of me like what, who is she? You know? Um, so I think, not necessarily a regret, but I think absolutely in the realm of courageous conversations and having difficult discussions with people, um, not be, I was probably more in my emotion rather than trying to look at both sides, if that makes sense. So I think again, it comes down to getting neutral.

Megan Imbert:

I think my goal is to try to be from a place of neutrality with difficult conversations versus being emotionally charged. Being emotionally charged. So I would say that's probably the realm of where it would be, where I would have been a little bit more emotionally charged to have a courageous conversation. But if it's still coming from your truth, then there's consequences to that and I think that's the piece of all of this game is there are consequences regardless, and if I'm in my truth, I can't control how you or someone else responds or reacts to me, and that's something that often I think can hold us back from having those discussions, because if we're living where everyone is sovereign and has autonomy, then my truth might not be in alignment for them anymore. So, yeah, I think it's just if I was ever emotionally charged rather than trying to get to the most neutral place and really thinking about the other person's perspective.

Caroline Balinska:

Yes, that's a whole other topic altogether. I think, megan, you've been amazing to talk to and I could keep talking.

Megan Imbert:

I'd love to have you back another day.

Caroline Balinska:

I think that you know we can do it. Tell us where people can find you, because you've got an amazing podcast and I would love people to reach out.

Megan Imbert:

Thank you so much and this was so fun. So predominantly I am on Instagram. So it's Meganimbert and that's I-M-B-E-r-t, or frequency of courage, and the show the frequency of courage is on apple podcast, spotify, amazon music. If anybody likes the show, please share it, leave a review. If there's someone that has a courageous story and might be a good guest, then feel free to reach out to me as well. Um, I really I try to really sink in before I invite people on the show, because I just want to feel it out. I've had a range of guests on that show, from journalists to widowers to just Everybody has a story. So I think Sorry, I'm rambling we can cut part of that. I would just say, if anyone's interested or has a suggestion for a guest, I'm always open to considering Fantastic.

Caroline Balinska:

Yeah, it's definitely something that choosing the right guests is really important, and I know exactly what that's all about and that's why I wanted you here.

Megan Imbert:

So I'm very happy, I'm so appreciative. This is awesome, it's so. Thank you so much.

Caroline Balinska:

Thanks, megan, so much for joining us and thanks everyone for watching and listening.