Updated AF Collective
Welcome to the "Updated AF Collective," podcast where we celebrate the power and resilience of women.
Join me as we dive into inspiring stories, engage in meaningful conversations, and explore topics that empower women from all walks of life.
We believe that every woman has a unique strength within her, waiting to be unleashed.
Whether you're an entrepreneur, a leader, a creative, a caregiver, or simply on your own personal journey, this podcast is for you.
Updated AF Collective
Emily Shurmers Guide to Living Magnetic
Unlock the secrets to becoming genuinely magnetic with the incredible Emily Shurmer, host of the new podcast "Secrets of a Soulpreneur." Emily joins us to explore how magnetism is a game-changer in manifesting desires like love, wealth, and health. She candidly shares her inspiring journey of launching her podcast and the magic that happens when you surround yourself with creativity-boosting individuals. We dive into how cultivating magnetism can make your dreams effortlessly achievable and how Emily's approach can energize and inspire anyone on their manifestation journey.
We also tackle the tricky business of attracting the wrong energy and how a negative mindset can be a magnet for the very things we don't want. Emily and I emphasize self-love and self-awareness as crucial tools for aligning with your true desires. Through engaging stories and experiences, we discuss how gratitude and letting go of control can shift your vibrational state, making life both more magnetic and fulfilling. Emily imparts her wisdom on letting the universe lead the way and how small yet significant wins can reinforce your belief in the manifestation process.
As we wrap up, Emily shares her insights on manifestation and the importance of maintaining high vibrational energy even on the tough days. We explore how practices like gratitude lists and embracing our emotions can keep us aligned with our desires. Emily also introduces a special offer for those seeking to manifest love in February, inviting listeners to reach out for expert guidance. Her approachable coaching style and dedication to helping others are at the heart of this episode, providing invaluable support for anyone eager to enhance their manifestation journey.
Follow Emily On IG!
https://www.instagram.com/radiant.soul.living/
Listen To Her New Podcast On Apple!
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/secrets-of-a-soulpreneur/id1786998592?i=1000692294536
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Hey guys, welcome back to Updated AF Collective. I am your host, megan Wirth. Today we have a very special guest, emily Shermer, back on the podcast because she just released her podcast, secrets of a Soulpreneur, and I was listening to it the other day and she had this incredible topic. It's one of my favorite topics, so that when I saw the title of that episode come up, I immediately pressed play. So she talked about the episode is called the secrets of becoming magnetic. It's episode eight on her podcast and as I was listening to it, I was like having this conversation with her and I'm like, yes, girl, I'm doing my makeup listening to this episode. And after it was over, I immediately DMG Emily and I was like get back on this episode or get back on my podcast, let's unpack this. Welcome back to Updated.
Speaker 2:Thank you so much for having me again. I'm so excited to be here again.
Speaker 1:I'm so excited that you're here. Like I said, we were talking before we hit record about, like everything that I wanted to unpack. My favorite topic is being magnetic, and I feel like it's such a good topic for the beginning of 2025, because this is where the energy is Like, this is where we have those goals and this is where we want to accomplish these big things. Well, how do we do it? And I've always believed in the law of magnetic, and so we're going to unpack that today. So, emily, before we get into that, first of all, I want to talk about your podcast. How has it been going? Tell me about the topics that you've been talking about and everything Sure sure I've been.
Speaker 2:I have you to thank for, actually. I want to start with that how grateful I am for you, because, literally like after that doing that podcast episode with you, it just like lit me up, and then I was like, oh my gosh, I literally love doing this. Why am I not already starting it? So after I think two weeks after being on your podcast, I was like what am I waiting for? Let's do it, let's go. And I just did it. So thank you for that.
Speaker 2:I've been loving doing my episodes. I've been talking all things manifestation, mindset, spirituality so if you're into all of those things, you can always come over to my podcast and say hello. Yeah, I just want to say I'm so grateful for you because I feel like also, it's part of that um, that topic that we're going to be talking about today is surrounding yourself with people who light you up and are in that space that you want to be in, and being in your energy. I was like wow. I also want to say I have so much respect for you because I've been mainly doing solo episodes, and I've done one episode with a guest. I had Dina on my show.
Speaker 2:We did it in person, though, and I have a whole new respect for people who do hosting podcasts and doing these interview podcasts, because I feel like it's such a whole nother topic, you know, because you have to also like listen to what they're saying, like engage with them, ask questions, and it's a whole other dynamic than just doing solo episodes hands up to you, because I never want to like feel like my the person is you know what's the word like not being heard or something like. Yeah, exactly, you want to be, you want to get all the questions out. I'm like I'm sure you have all of your questions, but then the conversation goes one way and another way.
Speaker 1:So, yeah, the whole thing and I honestly I like having guests on more than I like doing solo episodes, because I'm such a social butterfly and I get so energized when I'm talking to another woman who is like-minded like me and we're just like talking about this like crazy topic and going back and forth. I love it. I don't know, I'm such an extrovert though, so when I'm for me I struggle. When I have to do a solo episode, okay.
Speaker 2:I'm sure like once you get into it, you're fine though You've got. You've always got something to say.
Speaker 1:Eventually a good start. But, like I said, everybody listening on this episode, you guys have to go check out her podcast. It's so good. And the thing is I was going to tell you you are such natural and I, if I didn't know you, I would be like, oh, this girl has been doing this for a long time. Um, maybe she had another podcast in the past or or maybe she's a you know, an influencer or something, because the way you structure and the way you speak on your, on your podcast platform, is you're such a natural, you're calm, thank you. You're so calm and you're confident and I was like, if anything I can learn from that, you're the best.
Speaker 2:Thanks so much. Oh my gosh so why?
Speaker 1:why? First of all, why did you pick that uh topic to becoming magnetic? Um, why that topic first?
Speaker 2:I feel like being magnetic is one of the biggest keys to manifesting everything, literally, literally everything that you want. If you want to manifest love, if you want to manifest wealth, health, whatever it is. Being magnetic, I feel, is the core to manifesting. So that's why I really chose that topic. I think it's a huge topic that we can definitely unpack even more. I felt like I could have gone even further in my episode as well, but I'm loving that we're going to be talking about it today, absolutely.
Speaker 1:And for you know, I feel like being magnetic comes easier for some people than it does for others, and you kind of express that a little bit on your episode of like we all have that bestie who gets everything she wants. She's, you know, manifesting her dream job, you know her lifestyle, everything, and it just looks like it's this effortless energy about that. So can we talk about that for a second?
Speaker 2:Like yeah, you know what I'm saying, girl that for a second, like, yeah, yeah, you know what I'm saying, girl, yeah, yeah, I am. So, yeah, in the episode I explain how we can have that magnetic friend who is literally pulling out opportunities left, right, center. They're always, you know, getting that dream job. They're manifesting their dream relationship, all of that. And then on the flip side, you've got that friend who might be complaining about being in a toxic relationship or complaining about work. You know, there's a complete difference in that friend and that is their magnetic energy, right, and I feel the number one thing that makes someone so magnetic and so effortlessly magnetic within their energy is authenticity being true to themselves. That is key number one being true to who you are. I want to say as well, like I was wasn't always a magnetic person. Like I was wasn't always a magnetic person, I've got to admit. Like I. I remember one example I was thinking of um today was when I was dating, right early 20s.
Speaker 2:I was dating this guy and he was just not into the same music as me, but I pretended I was into his kind of music and it just you know to accommodate the other person exactly and I it just was not like it, just one little thing, like one example of me, not exactly one small thing of me, just, you know, accommodating to his music taste and it just wasn't me and he probably felt that. But anyways, like you know how you do, you try to fit in with the crowd and fit into people's expectations and their likes and their dislikes and all of that. But what I've realized is now I'm like you know, I've gone through it and I realize, no, I can just like what I like, I can just be me. And if you don't like what I like, then it's okay and I, I want to think like for a second.
Speaker 1:Like because our personality, if you allow yourself to kind of be fit into somebody else's mold and you try to, like you said, accommodate them, fit in their box, fit in their world, you know, now all of a sudden we're allowing that person to dictate us, like our personality, our dislikes and everything else too. So I feel like we're still magnetic, but we're attracting the wrong thing because we are trying to pretend to be somebody that we're not. Well, the universe is obviously very confused. So it's sending things that would probably normally be sending that person that you're trying to get to love you and, like you or, you know, be your bestie, and it's sending you things that normally it would send. That person is sending them to you and they're not aligning with you. So, if anything, it's confusing the universe.
Speaker 2:Exactly exactly. And I want to add to this as well, because another thing I want to talk about is frequency. So, as we say, like, energy does not lie and we as humans, we actually understand frequency before we can even speak, like, think about a baby, they will understand your vibration, your frequency. They don't know how to talk, they don't know what to they haven't, they can't even say words, yet they pick up on frequencies. So, at the basic human level, frequency is key and when you're in, when you go to walk in a room, you know if it's there's something off there, if there's, like you know, something you cannot really explain, but it's only energy, right. So this is huge.
Speaker 1:When it comes to becoming magnetic, it's being in that frequency, understanding the frequency of you and yourself, and others around you 110%, because think about it, girl we are the only species on this earth, human, that we fight the frequency and we fight energies by our intuition. All the other animals got their shit together and that's how they survive. They, they know how to enter a situation and say, no, I don't want to be in here. I, you know that. That's how they know. The difference between predator and prey is because it's all frequencies. There's no language going on there. It's literally they just they walk into something and they read the room and that's how they survive.
Speaker 1:We are the only species on this planet that we fight the frequency. We talk ourselves out of the bad energy. We talk ourselves into a situation. You know. Say, for example, we're on a bad date but we don't want to leave because we don't want to seem rude, and then it turns out that guy's like a really terrible person and now, all of a sudden, we're just like wow, I really wish that I just would have listened to my intuition. I would have. I wish I listened to my gut and left. You know what I mean? That's exactly all the time. Why are we like that? Is it because we're all where are we all people pleasers?
Speaker 2:or why are we like that is it because we're all where are we all people pleasers, or I think sometimes I think part of it is not being aware. I've, I've been in those situations myself where I haven't even had the awareness of I'm hearing them and I'm hearing what they're saying to me. They're saying they love me, they're saying they want to spend time with me, right, and I'm like, okay, I'll take those words, I'll take those words, but on another level, okay, what's the energy that they're giving me? What are the actions that they're showing me? Actions speak louder than words, I believe. So now I'm like okay, are you showing me that you love me? Are you, you know?
Speaker 1:what is the energy coming from? Yep, louder than words. Your body is always going to tell you what's wrong. If something's wrong, first your body, you're gonna, you're gonna hear it after the fact. But you are always going to have an emotion attached to you, whatever situation you're in. If you're meeting somebody for the first time, or if you're about to walk into a space, you know, know, like people, you know, getting onto a train, for example, like this is a terrible example. But like you tell yourself like don't get on the train. Or you hear something a little, a little intuition saying don't get on the train, and you're like, no, I'm going to get on the train. And you get on it and something bad happens.
Speaker 1:You know it's like you're not always feel something. If you are in tune, if you are, you know, aligned with your intuition, you're gonna always feel something. For me, I always get like like my tummy feels really, really sick or I get nauseous. Yeah, I always take that as a sign of like okay, something's really off yeah, definitely the same happens for me and I.
Speaker 2:It's so strange as well because I feel like my body tells me before I even find out something. So, for example, like when I've found out someone's cheated on me or someone like wants to break up with me, oh, my body is just telling me I get really sick for like a week or two weeks before it actually happens. And then it happens and I'm like, oh, and that's been like a week or two weeks before it actually happens. And then it happens. And I'm like, oh, and that's been like a repeating pattern I've like seen in my life where, you know, those things have happened. My body is literally telling me the frequency, the energy, especially because you're in relationship with someone, or if you are in a relationship with someone, you feed on their energy. So, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1:And I think that's a really good thing to be aware of is where's your energy, where's your frequency, because if you are with the wrong person, you're in the wrong crowd or the wrong friend group, or you just know, like this is not even you know your job, like if I'm not supposed to be here, you're going to feel it and that is your cue to you know, sit for a second, try to figure out another plan and then pivot and then go towards something that is better aligned for you. That's how you become magnetic is correcting like course, correcting your energy and your frequency. Otherwise, fighting it being un or inauthentic, fighting that feeling of something's wrong, is going to keep attracting more wrong, if that makes sense, like more negativity versus exactly and going towards where you're supposed to be and leaping and letting the net you know, appear after the fact.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and that and then I couldn't say better yeah, literally exactly yeah.
Speaker 1:So let's talk about, um, attracting like the wrong thing, because I had a crazy story as I was listening to your episode, who reminded me of actually a really bad, bad date that I went on last month and I and I looked back and I was like, oh my God, I completely attracted that. But before we talk about that, let's talk about, yeah, like how you can attract the wrong things. Um, because whether you know you being a negative person, um not having a gratitude practice, all the things like, yeah, what happens, or I guess, like what does a person do, or what kind of personality type is that that they're just attracting all these like negative things into their life?
Speaker 2:yeah, sure. So we spoke about it a little bit in the last episode we did together and that is the law of attraction, right? So like attracts, like energy, attracts like energy. So if you're in that kind of mindset of I think, okay, the biggest one, I'm not worthy, right I'm? I don't feel good enough for this relationship. I don't feel worthy of love. If you don't feel worthy of love, you're gonna attract someone who is not gonna value your worth, right? So it's literally having that, um, that awareness number one. Okay, do I have this limiting belief? I need to change that in order to attract a healthy relationship. I need to work on me. I need to fill my own cup. I need to give myself love. That is, I speak about it in my episode as well.
Speaker 2:Self-love is one of the biggest magnetizing things that you could do for yourself. If anything, start with self-love. It is the foundation of becoming magnetic, and a lot of people say, yeah, but don't you think that's selfish, like thinking of myself? No, because you need to pour into yourself in order to give to others, whether that's your friend, whether that's your daughter, whether that's anyone in your life. If you're not giving yourself what you need, don't expect to be able to give anything to anyone else.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and then you're always going to meet you where you are. So again, on this low vibration of like self-doubt, self-hatred or whatever, it's not a punishment and that's what I want people to think. Is they think, oh, god or the universe is punishing me. They keep sending me all these like asshole dudes or whatever, when in retrospect it's the universe giving you what you think that you want and you need. You're calling it in. It's not a punishment. I don't believe that we're punished from our angels or God or any of that. Whatever you guys believe. Even the universe Don't think that's a thing. I just think we're met where we're at. So if we're calling it in, they, if anything I say they as like our spirit, team or universe or God they're giving you what they think that you're asking for you want more assholes in your life.
Speaker 1:Well, you just opened the freaking door to more assholes in your life, and and so, like I said, like I hate when people like oh God hates me or punishing me, you know the universe is just sending me all this like bullshit. You know I got a flat tire in my car. You know I stubbed my toe in the morning. It's just been a shit day.
Speaker 2:Well, it's meeting you where you're at, so ship the hell out of that frequency and fix it exactly, and it's really about becoming in alignment with whatever it is that you want to attract, right? So reflect on okay, if you're calling in your dream partner, what are the key values that you have, the key attributes that you want them to have? Are they, are they, you are they. Are you embodying those attributes yourself? Be the person that you want to attract exactly that way.
Speaker 1:It doesn't confuse the universe. You know what I mean. Like do the things that you would normally do, or you know how you would want to be treated by that other person. Like already, be that person so that you have this like high vibrational energy, and the universe is like, okay, cool, we'll find you somebody that can match that Because, again it's, the universe is only going to meet you where you're at, so fix your limiting, especially when you're going into dating.
Speaker 1:I'll tell my story super quick, cause it's bananas and again like, I don't think I was being punished, but again, it's one of those like clear cut signs that you attract what you fixate on. And I I decided I was going to try this online dating thing Cause I've been single for six years and I was like you know what? Like maybe I'll put myself out there, but before I tried this online dating thing, have you heard of this like crazy Facebook group it's like? It's big in the States. It's called like are we dating the same guy?
Speaker 2:Have you heard of it. I've heard of something similar in the UK. I don't think it's that group specifically, but I've heard of something similar.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 1:So it's these Facebook groups, and they're all over the all over the States, and each major city has a Facebook group and I'm dumb enough to go at them all because I thought the drama was funny and crazy at the same time. So they'll post a picture of a guy from a dating website. They'll post his picture and say hey, warning, he's a creep, he's married or whatever. So it's like all these, like women in the world putting out these warning signs so that you know, girls like us don't go on a date with them. You know, and they'll explain why. So I would.
Speaker 1:For a while, I stopped doing this. I had to unfollow them because this is what happened. So I just scroll through them and be like, oh my God, like this is why I don't date. Oh my gosh, Like this guy's married, that's disgusting. And I would scroll through all of them and I remember like over and over and over again, telling myself like this is why I don't date. There's no good men in the world. And I was.
Speaker 1:I was reassuring myself as literally brainwashing myself, fast forward, and I I decided to go out on a date. This was last month and I decided to go out on a date and um again, like I was having those like feelings of like I shouldn't be doing this, like this doesn't feel right, you know, like he doesn't feel right, kind of thing. And we just talked a couple times on the phone and we decided to meet up and grab a drink and all of the red flags were coming up inside of me, Like. But I was like am I just nervous? Because I, you know, like I'm, I'm so afraid that he's one of those creeps from you know, and um, so we start, we met up with him and I did attract one of those guys.
Speaker 1:He yeah, it turns out he was married, Turns out, um, he's a huge creep. And I attracted every single thing that I was afraid of from that Facebook group, thinking, you know, again, I attracted it all into one man. I got out of that date so quickly. I got back to my car and I felt so nauseous and so sick and I was like, okay, I just attracted every single thing that I was afraid of to um in one guy, in one guy. I immediately like unmatched him, I blocked him and and I told myself I was like I need to reset and recenter my energy because I 110% attracted that the universe like gifted him to me, thinking because I was looking at all those Facebook groups day in and day out, thinking that's what I wanted in a man crazy. I've never had a bad date in my life until last month wow, that's crazy.
Speaker 2:That's great. It just goes to show what you put your focus on expands.
Speaker 1:Yeah. What's the saying when energy flows? What's the saying oh?
Speaker 2:yeah, I know when your attention goes energy flows. Exactly, that's exactly what happened to you. Yeah, wow.
Speaker 1:Yeah. So I wanted to obviously shift that and and I and I stopped doing the online dating thing. I was like, clearly my vibe is wrong. If I want to be magnetic one, I'm not comfortable with online dating anyway. So I need to get off that and the trust that's not how my soulmate is going to come into my life. I have to trust that because, being you know, online dating is not for everybody. I feel like it's not for me. I feel like I need to date somebody a little bit more organically in order to, like build that trust a little bit slower. So I stopped the online dating and I started for me to become magnetic. I write, I write everything down and I visualize. I'm a very, like, creative person. I can visualize things really, really well, and so that's how I've always been magnetic. So, when it comes to finding love, I need to go back to the basics and do what I know works.
Speaker 2:Definitely and I think on that I would say, because I know that you like writing as well doing anything that helps you in terms of like reflection, doing self-reflection around any limiting beliefs that you have around dating now and making sure that no other limiting belief is going to come up and block you from actually attracting the right man. And especially, you could do scripting as well. So scripting your ideal partner and how you're going to meet and how it's going to be, and really embodying that energy, I think that will work wonders. For you?
Speaker 1:I think so too, Cause you know it's so funny I script for every single thing else in my life, Like when it comes to my job or or, um, anything with the book and stuff like that so I can I call it like I don't know like my magic journal. I can write out the outcome and it literally happens like that. And it's crazy, it 99% of the time it happens. The only time, the one time it did fall apart, I was never meant to have that thing. And now I have that like it's 2020, where I see where I was never supposed to have that thing. So I say, 99% of the time it works for me because of that one time. But I write out this is what happened, this is the outcome, and then it always worked. It's crazy. So do you always recommend your client? Like scripting, is that big for you?
Speaker 2:it's big for me not all of my clients, though because I feel like everyone is so different. For example, like for you, you love to visualize, so I would definitely recommend you to visualize if you love writing scripting as well, but then there's other ways that you can do it as well, so some of my clients, for example, really want to see things in their house that show them that someone is coming, for example so I have done this in the past as well making space like in your closet for a partner. Let's talk about that.
Speaker 1:Hold on, that's a good yeah. By making so anybody listening who is trying to love. What do you mean by making?
Speaker 2:space, yeah, so making space, so having maybe like a spare drawer empty in your bedroom so you know, like when they're going to stay over, that's's their draw to put their clothes in. You're making space physically to have a partner who is literally ready to come in. But it's also like you could do other things, like OK, so maybe you want to envision going on a date. Take yourself out on a date, your perfect date, date yourself. Go out for a nice dinner, nice meal. What's the exact thing that you're gonna order? Is it a nice cocktail? Is it a nice you know, a really nice meal? Having dessert, do all of the things that you would do in a relationship, um, and do that.
Speaker 2:But there's so many other ways that people can, can manifest, and I feel like it's really finding what works for you and what you enjoy and what resonates with you as well. So what resonates with you is visualization. Maybe making space would be something that you'd like, because then you can physically see it. Right, you see it and you can just imagine, like okay, like that's where they're gonna put their things and things like that.
Speaker 1:So there's a really fun ways that you can manifest so it's not one size fits all is what you're gonna say. Yeah, some people need to be physical about it. Like, do something physical, whether it be starting like dating yourself, making space for that person by like cleaning up your house, making a door for that person and trying to, you know, I guess allow that manifestation in. Okay, so me for writing. Okay, is there any other thing? Like, do you have another client that needs to do it? Completely different from both of those things. Is there anything else?
Speaker 2:Yeah. So another one I would say is acting as if. So acting as if they are already in a relationship. So acting as if they are already in a relationship Again, it's kind of like the example of like taking yourself out on a date, doing the things that you would do when you have a partner.
Speaker 2:Visualization is a big one, I would say. A lot of my clients like to do the visualizations. Clients like to do the visualizations. Um, a big one as well would be letting go of all of those limiting beliefs.
Speaker 2:So, in terms of like manifesting, when you put something on your vision board or you script something, do you really believe? It is my, my biggest question to many of my clients, because I want you to embody, feel everything that you are putting on your vision board, that you're scripting. If you don't believe it, then then I'm sorry, but it's. It's gonna be a hundred times harder and we need to rewire your mind for you to to really believe it. So when we're thinking about manifesting, we're thinking about as well, like, how do you process things the best?
Speaker 2:So, for example, when you're in a classroom, do you process things by listening? Do you process things by observing, watching, touching, thinking about all the different senses and then making your manifestation process aligned with how best you take on and learn, on and learn, because that's the the key is really to to do all of the different techniques that really resonate with you. So, if you are visual, do the visualizations. If you are more like physical, you know, get out there and be in the spaces where you would meet that person. Um, if you like to listen, listen to music that you would, you know, listen to with your partner just different, so many different things that you can think about that you really want to act as if and just embody, being in that energy and being in that frequency of love that was so good and it was so Cause, as you were saying, that I could like, I was like.
Speaker 1:I already know one of my listeners is going to ask like, well, how do I know what works best for me? For whatever reason, that's the download I just got and I can honestly say for me, when I just got into this law of attraction space um, you know, manifestation space I tried a little bit of everything and then when I started having small wins, that's when I was like, okay, for for me it's writing. And when I started to see it having all of these tiny wins whether it be I find a $20 bill on the ground or I manifested a free coffee, and I'm like, oh my gosh, like the small wins work, I kept doing the writing and so and I liked that you said you have to believe it, and that's why those small wins are really big, because if you can do those small wins, it makes you believe, okay, like I'm going to try to manifest a whole house, which I did that, literally this house, by writing, by the way, by writing and um, and then so when you believe it's going to happen, it really does happen, but I honestly do believe that you have to one, you have to believe it's going to happen. And then you have to surrender it, because we tried to fixate on the how, like, okay, I'm going to do this, and then I'm going to call that, this and that, and then I'm going to get to that thing. But when you surrender, I had to surrender, for example, like this house. I had to surrender and I put it in God's hands and it all happened seamlessly, by the way, because I wrote about how like I got it.
Speaker 1:I just wrote about how I was feeling. I was like, oh my gosh, I'm so grateful, I'm so thankful it just manifested my dream house and that was it. And I feel like. That's why I say, like, going back, try to try to everything, try all of the different ways to manifest. And that's why it's so important having a coach like you to help you. Okay, like, try this. Okay, that didn't work. Try this. Okay, that didn't work. Now, what I want you to do is try this on that path and look at those little wins, and then it's so easy to believe it's going to happen.
Speaker 2:Exactly Because, also, you want to make it easy, right, you want to make it easy, effortless, you want it to be fun. Life is about having fun and and I never, ever want to work with someone who is feeling anxious to do all of the things, because I was that person who was like, oh my gosh, I need to do this, I need to say my affirmations in the morning, I need to do that and this, and it gets so overwhelming. You don't want to be in that overwhelming energy because then the universe is going to get even more confused. And what I love what you said just then as well that I really want to pick up on, because it's one of the biggest things that I work on with my clients is that surrender part. A lot of my clients I have to rewire and do the subconscious healing and the energetic healing around one of the biggest blockers, which is letting go of control.
Speaker 2:As humans, we love to know when things are happening, how things are happening. We want control and especially in a relationship as well, we love control. We're not gonna lie here. We love control. We love to tell our partners you know, do this, do that, you know like, but when you actually let go and do all of the things that you want them to do. You're gonna see them do the things, you know, whether that's texting you in the morning, whether that's, you know, inviting you for a nice special date, whether you're in a relationship or you're single, because even when you're in a relationship, you still gotta keep it spicy.
Speaker 2:You know, and yeah, letting go of that control, letting go surrendering, is such a big one, especially as well when it comes to magnetizing, because when we are in that magnetism state, you just trust, you're in complete faith, that everything is going to align for you, everything, even when things go wrong and you know you've missed your flight or you you've been cheated on. You know you have like this innate knowing that it's happening for you and not to you. That is like so, and people will look at you and just be like, oh my gosh, like how is she going through all of this? And still she, she's glowing. But it's because you have this like innate faith in in source, in god, in the universe. However you want to, you know, whatever resonates with you most, you just let go.
Speaker 1:And that's why I say it works 99 of the time, because when something does fall apart that you manifested, we can manifest things that don't necessarily fit or align with us, and if it falls apart, we're like, well, what hell? I just called that in. Sorry, I'm dog sitting right now. When it does fall apart, it wasn't something that was actually supposed to be in your life. You just control what is it Controlling manifestation or something like that where something in? And then you're so excited that it's here and then you watch it fall apart and you're like what the hell? But then, maybe after like a couple of weeks or a couple of months, you realize like oh, I wasn't supposed to have that and that's why it fell apart. So that's why I say like one, it's really, really important to have those micro wins, especially in your style, or what works for you calling things in your life. It's so important to have those micro wins because when you just learn to let go and you've seen like wow, it works, I'm just going to surrender, I'm going to manifest this one thing and I'm going to be like, okay, I'm putting the ball in the universe, universe's court, it's going to come to me eventually and go, and if it doesn't come to you, you have to remember that is a sign and there's something better coming for you, exactly, yeah, so let's talk about um For somebody who is like new to this space, because we're at one point, we were all new to this space and I feel like I had maybe five years when I was stuck in a really, really terrible marriage where I was like a super negative person and I tried to control everybody around me, including my ex-husband, and the more I tried to control, the worse my marriage got, or something like that.
Speaker 1:So for anybody that's like fresh out of a relationship or trying to get into this space or try to learn more, what is one thing that they can do today? Because I know what my one thing is that really, really worked for me. But I want to hear from you a code to what is something that that person can do right now to start shifting out of a negative vibration.
Speaker 2:Sure, Start with finding something that lights you up, something that really it's just for you and you love it, even if that's like just doing your hair right, doing your makeup. If that's something that you love to do, do, do that. Do things that are really going to encourage you to just be in this, like fun energy, like I don't think there's any other way really like to to raise your vibration in a way differently than doing things that you love to do, whether that's dancing, whether that's going to see a friend where you know, and just absolutely anything that's that you love to do is like number one. I would say. What's one for you, um?
Speaker 1:well, I love that you say that. So I'm just gonna like elaborate a little bit more, because for me, when you are in like a really dark space and we've all been there, you've probably been there too where we're crawling ourselves out like single handedly crawling out of a dark hole and we lose ourselves, we've lost ourselves in a really toxic relationship that I didn't know what I liked. I didn't even know what I wanted to do, like what lit me up. I didn't know what I liked. I didn't even know what I wanted to like. What lit me up, I don't know Cause I was in that space for five years.
Speaker 1:So if, if somebody's like well, I don't even know what I like, I don't know, I've been a mom for this many years and I or I've been in a toxic relationship for this many years, like or whatever, even just a depression, for this many, I like to think like, okay, we're going to reverse engineer this. For me, it was okay. What did I like to do before I was even in that relationship, or before I was a mom, or before I was in this toxic career? What did I really really like to do? And I had to go back and think that I did all of this later, Cause the thing for me when I left and started my life over was gratitude practice that worked for me writing my little micro wins down, or even if a girl complimented my outfit at Starbucks or something like that made my gratitude list free coffee, or even just you know like, oh, somebody smiled at me today. I had to find something to be grateful for and that really did help shift my vibration out of like a really negative person to high vibration, and especially like when you're in law enforcement and you already have depression, it it only makes it worse. So it's a lot worse because you're seeing the 1% of the world at their absolute worst, and so for me it just made my depression even worse. So I had to look for things like actively look while on duty, things that I was going to add to my gratitude list.
Speaker 1:But when it did, come time to like okay, I need to have fun, that was step number two for me. Come time to like okay, I need to have fun, that was step number two for me. To remember what did I love to do, and for me it was crafting. I loved going on Pinterest and like seeing, like whether it's like a new recipe or like a week to put on my door. Going to Michael's and Hobby Lobby and those craft stores was like for me. It was really like exciting, just to make something with my hands, to be creative, but reverse engineer it. For anybody out there that's listening I'm like I don't even know what I like, like what, before that thing in your life took over what it what? Who were you then?
Speaker 2:yeah, and also, like, I do a lot of inner child work as well. So thinking about, like, what you like to do when you were a child, was that drawing, painting, dancing? You know any of those things? But I love the gratitude one. Gratitude is such an underrated, you know thing. In the manifestation world Gratitude I 100% agree with you. In the manifestation world gratitude I 100% agree with you.
Speaker 2:Gratitude can lift you up so much when you're in that negative headspace. Just finding one simple thing, even if that is you getting up out of bed in the morning, that is something that you can be grateful for today. Gratitude raises your vibrations like nothing else, and I love the fact that you said that. I wanted to mention it as well in our last episode as well. But gratitude is so beautiful. It's such a thing, such a big one, that makes you magnetic as well, because, think about it when you um gift something to someone and you're they're so grateful, it makes you want to like give them another gift and another gift and another gift, right, and the universe looks at it like that as well. So when you're like, so grateful to the universe, like, oh my gosh, thank you so much for my friend, thank you so much for this cup of coffee, thank you, thank you, thank you. The universe is going to provide you with more and more and more, and we love that. We love gratitude and being in that energy.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and all it does is it takes just a little thing to happen to have that snowball effect. So I love the idea of like for me, I write mine at nighttime. Some people get up in the morning and write theirs in the morning, but what I like to do is I write mine at nighttime before I go to bed only because during the day I'm looking for things to add to my list. In the morning time I can't even think of like two things, you know, besides the fact that I do say like thank you for I'm awake today, you know I have a coffee that I can go drink right now. So that does usually make my gratitude list like first thing in the morning. But at the end of the day I have so many things to add to my list because I'm taking mental notes throughout the day of like the little things, and those little things snowball into eventually bigger things and it shifts your vibration in a way that you become magnetic and I feel like that is the difference between somebody who is being magnetic towards like the negative side of things, where bad things always seem to be happening to them. I have friends like that where I'm like, oh my gosh, like I. I don't say anything to them, but I'm watching a little bit of a train wreck and then I see the girls in my life that it seems like they always just have everything that they ask for. But I do believe it's because we have people who are super negative all the time, that have nothing but complaints versus somebody that has like that gratitude and is very grateful, and they keep receiving more.
Speaker 1:I feel like that is the one thing If I could tell anybody to start is just start a gratitude list. You might not feel grateful yet, but it takes time. For me, it took a couple of months to where I could actually start to feel it. I was writing this depressed, but you have to start somewhere and it's writing it right now and you don't feel grateful. You feel like your world is ending. Just start it, you will get there. The the gratitude feeling will catch up with you soon yeah, 100%.
Speaker 2:And I have something I want to add to this, because I don't know if you've ever tried it, but you know how we were talking about scripting.
Speaker 2:What I love to do with my gratitude is okay, looking around me, what am I grateful for right now, in the present moment?
Speaker 2:So I I've 100%. I know I've already got it. I'm grateful for this thing. But then if it's something that you want to manifest, being grateful within your grateful list or your scripting for that thing that you, you desire to have, so being in the energy of that, you being grateful that you already have it now, you scripting it, like saying, okay, for example, if you are manifesting your dream relationship, being grateful for you know all of the different things, like kind of putting in the visualization as well whilst you're scripting, but being really grateful for it. Your subconscious mind, which is 95% of your, your mind, doesn't know whether it's real or not. So if you are embodying and whilst you're scripting or you're visualizing, doing whatever you want to do, being grateful for that thing, that manifestation is going to come in a hundred times faster. That's when you're to make quantum leaps in your manifestations. Because you're in that gratitude, you're in that embodying that, that frequency that we were talking about Right.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I love that you said that because, like, I'll do that sometimes too. If, if, particularly, I'm having like a really great day, everything is good, I usually will drop what I'm doing because I'm like, I'm in such a good mood Today has been so good let's manifest. And I will literally sit and I will write thank you for this and thank you for letting this happen today, things that did happen. But then I will also say, you know, thank you so much, universe, for sending me $10,000 this week. I am so grateful. Thank you so much. This is going to pay for, you know, our next family vacation.
Speaker 1:And and I start calling things in because I'm already at this like high vibe level, and then, and if I don't have a journal, so for me, um, really intense exercises puts me in a really good mood, and so I'll go to spin class. And if you know anything about spin, it's an intense workout, it's so intense. I love spin, I love it, and so I'm in spin class. And so, towards the end, you know how like you're like, yeah, like we're 45 minutes in and you know we start to slow it down a little bit on the bike and we're climbing that you know mountain, so we put the gear on. It's super hard, super sticky, and we're climbing up there.
Speaker 1:I'm usually in such a good mood that, like, I start in my head Thank you, god, thank you, universe, for doing this Like thank you, thank you, thank you, because I'm such in a high vibrational level you have to check yourself when you are feeling so good. You are an open portal for manifestations. That is literally the last three years of my life how I've manifested, or a quantum leap, I should say, is like when I'm feeling high vibe, don't waste it. Don't waste it Like, oh, I just feel really good and then you have an opportunity to start. For me, it's writing, start writing things down or visualizing. I'll visualize when I'm at spin class in that really high vibe frequency and I will manifest the crap out of so much stuff it's crazy. I will call in clients. I've done that where I'm like thank you for sending me three clients this week. Well, guess what it happens.
Speaker 1:And yeah, oh my gosh, that's how I call in so much stuff. So yeah, it's your high vibe, definitely.
Speaker 2:And I want to add to that as well, just quickly, because a question that I get a lot is can I manifest when I'm not in a high vibration? And the answer is yes. So, even if you are in a low vibration and we all have those days we all have them tough days where you just oh, you're like why, you know what is going on and you're just feeling down, you're in on your period. Maybe you know, you're just feeling like I need to open the tub of ice cream and just eat the whole thing. You can still manifest. You can still be magnetic as well, you can.
Speaker 2:I've had days where I have not been feeling it and then I've got a client just out of nowhere and I'm like you know it doesn't need to hold you back. You just need to stay aligned with your desires. You need to have faith, as we said, that everything is going to work out. You can be in the, in the low vibration, but it's just important to give yourself grace in those moments. Allow yourself to feel every single emotion, because you're still human. We all are. We still need to have those days sometimes. You need to just give yourself grace, have compassion, know that tomorrow is going to be a better day and, you know, everyone has the ability to become magnetic.
Speaker 1:I love that you said that because, again, like I feel like I'm getting I'm so glad that you said that there's so much noise out there in this space where it's like toxic positivity and you can manifest if you are having a shitty day. I manifested $7,000 on one of the worst days of my life back in December. I manifested $7,000 on one of the worst days of my life back in December and, yeah, I literally came through when I was, I was like crying, I was having a really tough day and I feel like but that's why it's so important that you take those opportunities when you are having really great days, take the opportunity to do your rituals. You know like, if you're in that high vibe space, do what you normally would do your way, your style of manifesting, because you're building up that pressure so that when you do have that bad day because we all have bad days, we're all human, having human experiences that we can't stop it sometimes but you have so much positive energy behind you that it's kind of like overriding your really shitty moment in time. So when you have that pressure behind you, built up from all that gratitude and your rituals and your manifestation stuff, and you know it kind of overrides everything that's happening in the moment.
Speaker 1:When I was having my really really bad day, I felt like everything was just tumbling apart. I was crying like sobbing Cause I just felt so overwhelmed with work and life and everything. On my phone and I got a notification that $7,000 had just been put into my bank account by the veteran affairs association. So I was like, and it made me think, like why is this happening? Cause I'm in such a low vibration.
Speaker 1:I just manifested seven and then I remembered it's because I've had such a low vibration. I just manifested seven grams, and then I remembered it's because I've had a lot of really great days before that. So all of that like happy, positive energy, if anything, it kind of really helps me in that moment, and I was. You know, I'm not saying like this happens to everybody, but eventually, like I said, like you are going to have to pick yourself up off that floor, dust yourself off and keep moving forward, but feel, feel what you need to feel in that moment and then continue on, you know, trying to raise your vibration in some some way by, like I said, the gratitude list is what helps me the absolute most.
Speaker 2:So yeah, for sure, and I feel like a lot of people in the manifestation space as well. They, they do everything, they try all of the things, but then they're like it's just not happening, like they're, you know, feeling really stuck and they're like where is that 10k month, you know? Or where is my dream partner, or where is my dream house? It's just. Or the holiday, all of that.
Speaker 2:But you need to realize that everything you're doing, the smallest things, whether that's the gratitude, the visualization, the meditations, anything that you're doing right now, you've got to think of it like how nature works. When you plant a seed, it goes into the soil, it goes into the dark. You're watering it, you're nurturing it, and that's what you're doing with yourself. You're nurturing your, your mind, your body, your soul through every single exercise that you do. So don't think it's going all to waste. It's not the fact that you are listening to this podcast right now. You're nurturing yourself. Be proud of yourself for being here listening to this episode, because it's helping you. It's helping you to manifest anything that you desire. It's all going to work out. It's going to come in divine timing. Again, remember what we said trust the process, be in surrender, take the aligned action, but be in the surrender as well.
Speaker 1:Absolutely. Sometimes manifestations take time because the universe has to move people and players and situations around. In order for you to get to from point A to point B, things have to shift. We are in a, you know, three-dimensional world and unfortunately sometimes the bigger the manifestation, the more things have to change. In order for you to get from point A to point B, things have to move around. The best example I can think of was this house that I manifested Right when I thought that I wasn't going to be able to buy in my little small town. I didn't think I could afford it. This home came on the market and it was discounted $80,000. But it took two separate buyers to fall through their financing, to fall through in order for this house to be discounted. So sometimes things take time because they have to rearrange Things have to get moved.
Speaker 2:Exactly, the universe will do its thing, even like the example with me and my relationship my ex he cheated on me, got another girl pregnant. I had the worst week ever. Literally the universe was making space because I was like, okay, I'm done, I'm, you know, gonna focus on me. And in the quickest time, the universe was like here you go, here's, here's the man that you're meant to to be with within less than a month. And I was like what? But it's, I know it's, because I was working on self-love for a whole year whilst I was in that toxic relationship. I was like filling myself up, even though I didn't have the courage to leave that toxic relationship when I should have it all worked out. I was meant to have that lesson. It was meant to happen. Absolutely Everything happens in divine timing. When your whole world is crashing before your eyes, know it's happening for you Exactly.
Speaker 1:Things have to get moved and sometimes things have to get tore down and sometimes you have to become a different person. You, I'm sorry, like sometimes it's gonna hurt when you have these quote, unquote awakenings, when you are your entire being and personality and everything around you is crashing down, all it's doing is reconstructing a different person. You cannot manifest your, you know, like your dream career, your dream man, with the person you are today. It's going to to take a completely different mindset in order to get to where you want to be, because, think about it, if we stayed the same, we are the result of our reality right now. So our personality, whether you like your, your reality or not, your personality attracted every single thing right now.
Speaker 1:So if you're a broken poor living in a shack, you have to change because your mindset is actually there. So you have to break all that down in order to manifest a completely new reality. You cannot stay the same. So sometimes, if people come into our lives to tear us apart and tear us down, it is your job and your obligation, if you want a better reality and a better life, to work on yourself, whether you get a manifestation coach, a life coach or whatever, but it is your job to invest in yourself, to completely change your life.
Speaker 2:Sorry, that's my two cents. I love it, I love it, love it. I couldn't have said it any better because, also like for me as well, like in my journey, I invested in mentors, in group programs and everything and it all. The biggest investment is in you. It's in yourself, right yeah?
Speaker 1:Yeah, and, like I said, like you're not going to manifest your dream career with the person you are today, it's just not going to happen. You have to align to that. So somebody who's leaving, for example, like maybe they work as a server or a bartender somewhere and they want to be like a fashion designer, well, one, go put yourself around fashion designers and two, you need to start becoming that person. So acting as, or acting as if it's already happened does help a lot. Not saying like, go around telling everybody you're a fashion designer and lying about it. I'm not saying you lie, but you feel that and you write about it. For me, I write about. You know what I want to do? I'm going to be a New York times bestselling author and I write about it and I tell myself that this is going to happen and I act as if I am, by one, getting my damn book done you know, but you need to.
Speaker 1:You need to strip everything away that got you to where you are today and start over from scratch.
Speaker 2:Definitely definitely Surround yourself with like-minded people.
Speaker 1:Exactly Before I let you go, girl. Is there anything else that you can think of that the listeners out there need to know about becoming magnetic, especially in 2025? For somebody who needs one action step to do today besides everything that we mentioned, is there anything else you can think of?
Speaker 2:one other thing is don't be afraid to set boundaries. Um, it's something that I have worked on the last couple of years is, yeah, setting boundaries, learning to say no. Don't be that person who says yes to absolutely everything. Don't say yes when you really seem like me, no, that's one thing I would definitely say. Set boundaries. Set healthy boundaries. Stay true to who you are. Stay true to your values. Do not change for anyone. Stay in alignment with your, the core of who you are, the essence of who you are. The number one thing I said in the beginning was authenticity be yourself. There's nothing else more magnetic than being who you are.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I love that. Oh, once again, I I'm so grateful for you, girl, like I do believe that you got put into my life for a reason and I can't thank you enough. Everybody listening to go follow your podcast. Follow you on Instagram and I will leave the podcast link in the show notes, as well as your Instagram notes as well as your anything.
Speaker 2:But thank you. Yeah, your podcast is amazing and I'm so glad. Thank you so much.
Speaker 1:I'm gonna have to have you on my podcast. Would you come on?
Speaker 2:I will, yes, you can schedule that yeah, that would be amazing because I love our conversations and I love doing this with you and I'm super, super grateful for you as well. Thank you for having me on again. I've loved it and I hope this episode brings value to all of your listeners, and I can't wait to listen to more of your episodes because I absolutely love tuning into your podcast.
Speaker 1:Appreciate you, girl, and we will definitely have you on for a third time because this conversation has been so good. I feel like I've learned a couple of things, like making space for manifestations. I feel like I learned something new every single time I talked to you. But you are a coach. That's the best thing about me. I feel like I can take advantage of all of your knowledge. Like, yes, yeah.
Speaker 2:Honestly. If ever you have any questions, do message me anytime. I also have a special offer at the moment for manifesting love, specifically for the month of February, so if there's anyone out there who wants to manifest love, I do have that available as a special one-off offer. So yeah, we're gonna're going to put that out there too.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I'm going to add all of that because I just want everybody to follow you. I want I want people to attach themselves to you and the best thing about Emily you guys, if you do have a question, she'll answer you. Just send her a DM If you, if you have any questions about this episode or something that you heard on her podcast, you that's the thing with you is like you're such a sweet person that you know, when I even message you, you always message me back and you guys, thank you so much for being on updated AF. I appreciate you, girly, my pleasure, thank you.
