Ep. 39 Struggling with Life Lifin'? Find Fulfillment and Overcome Struggles Through Faith

What if the secret to overcoming life's obstacles lies in finding contentment and faith in yourself and something greater?

We explore the profound message of finding contentment and fulfillment through faith while overcoming challenges and self-doubt. Join us as we share personal stories, biblical insights, and encouragement for creating a life filled with purpose and peace.

- Unpack the powerful message of of Philippians 4:13 and its impact on faith and strength
- Journey of Self-Doubt to Empowerment
- Embracing your inner strength can lead to true fulfillment
- Share personal experiences of overcoming struggles and self-doubt
- Peace, joy, and fulfillment aren't just distant ideals but present realities
- Examining concepts of embracing contentment and fulfillment in our everyday experiences and within a biblical context. 
- God's presence is constant, even in difficult times.
- An intimate relationship with God provides comfort and strength.
- Trusting God's purpose can guide us through trials.
- Address the importance of community and connection during tough times
- Believing in oneself is crucial for personal growth..

Calls to Action: 
Share this episode with three individuals that you would like to empower. 

If you are ready to go deeper, schedule your program consultation at www.krystaljae.com/book-online.

Chapters

• 0:03 Finding True Fulfillment Through Contentment
• 4:38 Discovering Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment
• 16:31 Overcoming Struggles Through Faith and Advocacy
• 26:40 Navigating Through Trials With Faith
• 36:27 Empowerment Through Inner Strength

Transcript

Krystal Jae: 0:03

Have you ever had someone tell you, or have you told your child that they can do anything that they can put their mind to? Did you get it from Philippians 4.13? I can do all things through Christ, who gives me strength. Now, did you know that it is a saying or a scripture that many athletes, competitors and those who need that boost of encouragement say to each other and to themselves? Now, when I was a teenager, I would tell myself that I could do all things, but it wasn't through Christ who gives me strength, and I didn't say it with conviction or believe it, not even a little bit. It was more of a I can do it. I can do such and such, because if I don't do it, I will be forgotten about or I will be not liked. So therefore, I can do it. Okay. But it wasn't until I found out that I was pregnant with my firstborn that I was like I can do this and mean it with everything in me. I began praying, asking God to help me, because I wanted to be the best mom possible and I needed God and his angels to protect me and my baby while I learned to do my best, be my best and give my best, my best and give my best. But then, as always, life began lifing. Slowly but surely, I started to learn what Philippians 4.13 really meant and how grateful I was for that. Now, this is the perfect time for you to go ahead and share this episode with three people. Okay, I'll be right here and I'll wait for you. Go ahead and hit that share button real quick. Hey, hey, welcome.

Krystal Jae: 2:17

To Overcome Suffering in Silence, it's time for you to stop people pleasing and create your better life. I, Krystal Jae , The Empowerment Goddess and your Somatic Trauma-Informed Life Coach. This season has already started in a way I couldn't even imagine. Now, are you ready for some realness, raw healing and a glimpse into what it feels like to walk in peace, clarity and purpose, while truly knowing who you are? If your answer is yes, then you've come to the right place. For the past two decades, I've been blessed to share my journey with countless women and a few men, empowering them to overcome the lingering shadows of physical, emotional, psychological and sexual abuse. Together, we confront the limitations that hold us back, like self-doubt, guilt, fear, shame and that pervasive sense of unworthiness. Dig deep to uncover the root of these feelings. Break free from the inner pain of suffering and silence, find faith, grow in that faith and embrace the life that is meant for you. Enjoy the real stories and practical advice, life enhancing skills and spiritual wisdom to guide you from pain to purpose, self-doubt to confidence and confusion to clarity. So let's leave the struggle bus behind and embark on this journey to discover the freedom, beauty and strength that lies within you. Remember you are not alone and you are enough. When times get tough, pray, listen and follow through, because God loves you and trust me when I say he is not your trauma. Welcome to Overcome Suffering in silence with crystal jay.

Krystal Jae: 4:10

A couple years ago, I did my first sermon speech whatever you want to call it, because I'm not a pastor, but hey, I got to. I got the honor of sharing god's word and the title of that was Embrace Contentment and Find True Fulfillment. Isn't that powerful? Because it was, and so today I want to share that with you. Is that okay? So we're going to start with embrace contentment.

Krystal Jae: 4:38

What does embrace mean in the dictionary? So, in the dictionary, embrace means it's an act of accepting or supporting something willingly or enthusiastically. Okay. In the Bible it can be more of to clasp and hold fondly, to receive, to admit. You see, we embrace, right, we embrace our loved ones, our church, family, our close friends, and there are some people who embraces everyone, right, they may like, oh you know, they just love to embrace and to accept or to hold fondly. Now, whether that embracement is a healthy one or not, we're not having that discussion today, okay or not. We're not having that discussion today. Okay.

Krystal Jae: 5:26

Now, contentment. Contentment in the dictionary is a state of happiness and satisfaction, being comfortable in any situation. Now, I've been in some situations and many were not comfortable at all, but I also did not know contentment as well. Okay, now, some places that you may have felt discontentment would be like in your work, your marriage and with your children, friendships, maybe your church and your success, right, your finances. But the one thing about discontentment in God is that God has us at all times. We just have to know and believe that he's there.

Krystal Jae: 6:14

Now, in the Bible, contentment means to be pleased or satisfied, to have a state of peaceful happiness. Now, I don't know about y'all, but I know that I love being at the state of peacefulness, right, I love to be happy, I love to have joy, and if you don't, I want you to know. Those are things that you can have right, that's the purpose of overcome suffering and silence. Right Is for you to learn to have that peace in your life, to have that joy in your life, to have that happiness in your life. Okay, fulfillment, because this was embrace contentment and find true fulfillment. So what does fulfillment mean? So, in fulfillment in the dictionary means the achievement of something desired, promised or predicted. Right In the Bible, it kind of says to complete, bring to an end.

Krystal Jae: 7:19

Now I want you to think of a time that you may have been unfulfilled. Okay, when were those times for you? When were you unfulfilled? Now? Some examples could be you went for a raise and you didn't get it. Or your relationships are toxic and they include maybe some narcissistic behaviors, cheating, lack of communication. Right, it could be feeling misunderstood, friends not having free time for you, a vacation being canceled, not having the finances that you want or need. Or it could be having a successful career and still feeling unfulfilled career and still feeling unfulfilled. Do any of that relates to you? I know some of it related to me and some of it has related to my clients. Now it's time to do the opposite.

Krystal Jae: 8:21

I want you to think about the feelings that you felt when you were fulfilled. How did that feel emotionally? How did it feel physically? Were you happy? Were you waking up in the mornings and ready for your day? Were you picking up the phone and calling and texting people, or putting more posts out on social media or whatever else? What were you doing when you felt fulfilled? How did that feel for you? How did that? How did you feel in your mind? How did it feel in your body? How did it feel in your spirit? Right?

Krystal Jae: 8:58

So some things I want you to think about when times that we have been fulfilled is. You received that raise. You have a successful and healthy relationship. You feel heard and understood. You got more than what you expected from an answer. You had a great time with a friend. You had the best much needed vacation Y'all.

Krystal Jae: 9:21

I had a vacation in November and it was so much needed. I didn't realize how much I needed that vacation. Y'all. I had a vacation in November and it was so much needed. I didn't realize how much I needed that vacation. But me and my husband, we went on a cruise with my in-laws and we had a great time. I came back with a cold, but it's all good, but it felt good and it was good to be fulfilled in that moment, to have that fulfillment because I didn't know I was missing that peace. So it took my sense of happiness and my sense of peace and took it to an even bigger level and, believe me, I was accepting to that and I want that for you. Right, because being fulfilled feels great right Now, of course, with God, with him, we can be fulfilled with all things.

Krystal Jae: 10:09

We can live life with true peace and grace. Okay, now the truth about Philippians 4.13, for I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength. I want to go through verse 10 with you. Okay, it says how I praise the Lord that you are concerned about me. Strength. I want to go through verse 10 with you. Okay, it says how I praise the Lord that you are concerned about me. Again, I know you have always been concerned for me, but you didn't have the chance to help me.

Krystal Jae: 10:36

Now, in this, paul is writing to the church in Philippi to let them know that he appreciateates that they are concerned about him, but they can't help him out of prison or with the beating that him and Silas endured before being thrown into prison. Right, they are now in prison. They're shackled to the actual guards and they can't escape. So I want to know, or I want you to think about how many times have you felt beat down and shackled? How did that feel Now? Did those chains come free? Were you released from those shackles by yourself, or did they do them by themselves? Did they just all of a sudden be like oop, poof, gone and there's no issue? You're no longer feeling shackled anymore. Is that how it was? Or did you ask God to break you free from the circumstances that you were in? Did you let go and let God? How many times have you heard that phrase? Oh, let go and let God. What does that mean to you? I want you to think about that. Okay Now, in that process of the shackles being taken off of you, did you fight and worry and try anything possible to be free again, or did someone come and save you? Are you still feeling shackled and you wish you could be set free? Which one is it for you Now?

Krystal Jae: 12:30

In verse 11, it says not that I was ever in need for. I have learned how to be content with whatever I have. I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything. I have learned the secret of living in every situation, whether it is with a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little. Now what I think Paul is saying here is I am fine. I don't need anything extraordinary, as through my trials and tribulations and my life circumstances, I have learned to be at peace and without worry with whatever I have. I know what it feels like to be poor and I know what it feels like to be rich. I know what it is to be full and I know hunger. That's what I get from that. What about you? What do you hear from that?

Krystal Jae: 13:34

Now, just like when a couple say their vows when they're getting married, right, we say for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, till death. Do us part. The glory is is that with God there is no death. Do us part, as we are then in heaven with him. He provides all our needs here on earth and just asks us to be faithful to him. Share his word so that others may get to know him. He provides all our needs here on earth and just asks us to be faithful to him. Share his word so that others may get to know him. Now, how is that for peace, to know that there is someone that will always have your back, someone that will always listen and someone that will always love you. Because, let's be honest, those three things is something that a lot of us have struggled with is having someone to have your back, having someone that will listen to you, having someone that will love you, or feeling like someone actually loves you and loves you for you right Now.

Krystal Jae: 14:45

4.13, I can do everything through Christ who gives me strength. What does that mean? For I can do everything through Christ who gives me strength. You see, paul is letting the church know that through Christ he can do everything, he can make it through everything. And now it doesn't mean to go to work, okay, and do the minimum and then expect to get a $2 raise Because, I mean, did you do the work for that $2 raise? You can't just expect it and not be doing the work right Now.

Krystal Jae: 15:31

This one, I am even guilty for Showing up at church and being like. I did my part. I showed up and now I'm just going to move on about my week and not serve the Lord for the rest of the week. How many times have you heard oh, be in the club on Saturday and in church on Sunday. That was definitely me for a while, and I know there's a lot of people who you know do that and then they go to church and then when they go into church, you know they're serving in the church and they are bringing God with them through everything that they do. I can admit that I was definitely one that would go to the club Saturday night, be in the church on Sunday morning and then Sunday afternoon I'm back out in the streets, you know doing my thing and I'm not serving the Lord. I'm not doing Bible study, I'm not doing devotionals, I don't have a prayer life Like that was me in one part of my life.

Krystal Jae: 16:31

But the one thing is we are to share his word right, we are to work in God's house. Right, we are to work in God's house. We are to show and be examples of God's love, god's respect, god's acceptance. Right, because we are his children and we're supposed to accept each other, because none of us is perfect, but we shall be his disciples and show his grace, his mercy. Don't you think so? Now? I know, I know some of it may have stung, but it's okay because we are talking about the truth.

Krystal Jae: 17:17

Okay, and when I realized what Philippians 4.13 really meant, and it wasn't just a oh. I can do all things through Christ, who gives me strength. He's going to give me the strength to go out here and I'm going to be the best at this track meet and I'm going to be the best on my job. But in reality, I'm not practicing for that track meet. In reality, I'm showing up late to work, I'm leaving early from work, I'm calling in from work, I'm not doing my best when I'm there. How are we supposed to get all that goodness if we're not putting in the work Same thing? We're supposed to be going out there and showing the love, the respect, the grace, because if we want that, we should also be giving that. But we shouldn't be giving that and expected to get it back. We should be giving it because we are disciples of Christ. We are sharing his word, we're sharing his love.

Krystal Jae: 18:20

Right Now, god has seen me through some difficult times. He seen me when I was completely broken and he was there when I was doing really well, like purchasing my home. God guided me as a single mother when I felt less than and didn't feel like I was worthy or enough for my child. God was there for me when I lost almost everything my job, my savings, the CDs I had for me and my child, when I lost the home I had for me and my child. He was there when I lost my car, like I lost all of that at one time while still dealing with other things. It was a difficult, difficult time and I didn't believe that I had anything left, like I was like man. I'm a single mom, I'm doing the thing. I'm not only taking care of my child by myself, but I'm able to feed us, I'm able to have a nice car, I'm able to have not only a savings but also a CD and then losing all of that it took me down because I was like, okay, now I haven't accomplished nothing. Everything that I worked so hard for was gone. So I know the feeling of wondering where I was going to get the money for groceries, how I was going to pay the light bill or how I was going to put gas in my car.

Krystal Jae: 20:18

And this may not be your story, but it's mine and for some of my clients theirs has been similar. Theirs have also been looked like maybe missing the deadline on an important project at work, not raising enough money for a finance project not being approved for the new house, or experiencing a partner cheating. It could have been that you know you have a business but it's not bringing in profits, or that you're kind of being like, oh, I'm missing something, but I don't know what it is. My marriage is awesome, my marriage is awesome, my home is beautiful. I love my career, dang, but something is missing. What is it? Is that? You have you ever felt like something is missing? You have everything that you have ever wanted, but something is still missing. Is that? You? Have you been there? Are you still there? You know, there was times that I was struggling.

Krystal Jae: 21:41

I often asked the question why me? What did I do? Am I that bad or that horrible to where God doesn't even want to show up for me, to where he's allowing all of these things to come into my life? And I'm just trying to live my best life Like. I know. I'm not doing everything like a Christian should do, but, dang, I ain't out here doing stealing. I'm not out here murdering people. I'm not out here being a horrible person. I'm just taking care of business and doing my best as a single mom, doing my best as an individual. So why, all of a sudden, everything is gone? And so I experienced those things Later on, when I was married, I actually kept going to my doctor because my leg was hurting and I was like, dang, I didn't hit it on, nothing, I haven't fell or anything.

Krystal Jae: 23:00

What's going on? What is happening to me? I would go to the doctor and he'd be like, oh, you're fine, nothing's wrong. Did the x-rays, did the Doppler, did all that kind of stuff? And they're like you're fine. I'm like, no, something's wrong. And then, months later, guess what happened? Your girl had a saddle block, pulmonary embolism. I had a huge one. It actually blocked the oxygen to my lungs and it was like going up my was that the aorta? I don't know, got y'all. It's been a while since I did anything medical. Yeah, it was huge and I couldn't breathe, like I would literally just turn and my breath was gone.

Krystal Jae: 23:42

My daughter at that time was two and it was only her and I at the house, and so I was actually able to pick her up, put her in her car seat, drive about eight minutes down the road, wait in the lobby of the doctor's office, go to the back. When the nurse came in it was doing my vitals and all that other kind of stuff. They were like hold on. And she walked out the room. And the next thing, I know, my doctor came in and she looked me over, asked questions, and she was like hold on. She walked out the room. Next thing I know there's two doctors in there and they were like look, we don't call the ambulance. We really think that you have a pulmonary embolism and we had already called 911. Ems is coming. Can anybody come get the baby? And I was like no, no one can come get the baby.

Krystal Jae: 24:30

You know, I was in Georgia staying with my mother-in-law. My husband was still in Texas because we were transitioning from Texas to Georgia and my mother-in-law had went out of town. And I was like oh my gosh. So I had to call my mother-in-law and let her know like hey, I need somebody to come get the baby. You know, duh, duh. And so she ended up arranging for her friend to get the baby.

Krystal Jae: 24:54

But before I knew that her friend was getting the baby, my doctor was like okay, we're sending you in the ambulance to the hospital. We don't want you to take her. And so my doctor was like I'm going to watch her. She was like I will keep her with me, I will watch her until someone's able to pick her up. Isn't that awesome? Because someone else could have been like, okay, we're going to send her with you and while they're doing all these things at the hospital with me, guess what they would have did? They would have called a social worker or they would have called, you know, child protective services or somebody to come get the baby, until someone can come get the baby and everything else. But my doctor was like no, I'm going to keep the baby. So, literally as I'm going out on the stretcher and I see Zakiye at the nurse's station and two of the nurses over there playing with her and she's just laughing and everything else, she's like mama, who she didn't even notice. I was gone.

Krystal Jae: 25:48

That was a horrifying experience when I was advocating for myself but no one wanted to listen to me, and that's just only one time that I experienced being an advocate for my health and not being paid attention to. So if you've experienced that, I feel you and it sucks. You was like please listen to me, you're feeling anxious and you're feeling like no one cares and you're feeling like no one cares. God still got you. He got your back Because if he didn't have me through that time, I wouldn't be here, because it wasn't nobody but God that made it capable for me to make the moves that I made to leave the house, where it was just me and my daughter.

Krystal Jae: 26:40

Literally, I made just a turn, a half of a step, and I didn't have no kind of oxygen, no kind of breath in my body. It was serious and all I could do was pray. And he came through. So who can put breath in our body like that? But God, he is with us through all things. He's present with us at all times and, honestly, he's present with us when we don't even want him to be, because have you ever been so down to where you've been, like I just want anybody, everybody, leave me alone, like God. Don't even be trying to send people over here to talk to me. Just leave me alone. I don't want to pray, I don't want to do nothing, I just want to be left alone by myself and just soak. Have you been there?

Krystal Jae: 27:42

I want you to know that sometimes God allows us to go through some things, but we choose how we go through it. I'm going to reference Job's story. That's a good one for that example. So if you haven't read Job's story, go read Job. Really, and most likely, if you're listening to this podcast or you follow me, you felt those things as well. But guess what? God is still present and he's still there for us and he's with us. You see, he allows us to go through things because sometimes there's a lesson learned from them that is more powerful and it leaves us strong and more equipped to walk in the purpose that he has for us. I want you to pay attention to the purpose that he has for us, because sometimes our purpose can be different, totally different, from God's purpose and what he wants us to walk in. He may be having this clear, beautiful path laid out for us, but here we are going to the left and going to the right and not staying on this straight path that he has cleared out for us, right, and so I want you to believe and trust and know that you can really do all things through christ, who strengthens you. You can know God's love, god's grace, god's mercy and God's peace is different than what we provide for ourselves or what that we settle on.

Krystal Jae: 29:34

To be honest Now, my love for God. My intimate relationship that I have with God is what gets me through the storms, the disappointments, the confusion and, recently, the loss of my beautiful sister. Oh, my goodness, that one. That was a tough one it was. I didn't expect it, I really didn't, but my faith in him, my faith in God and believing in God and having the intimate relationship that I have with God is what is getting me through. It's what is helping me have a smile on my face when I have a smile on my face, it's the one that's helping me have a smile on my face when I have a smile on my face, is one that's helping me understand, is the one that is um, oh, getting me through right. And so, yes, we go through things that we don't expect. We go through things that give us sadness, that we experience pain, hurt, disappointments, right. But one thing that I do know is that if it wasn't for me having an intimate relationship with God, I wouldn't be doing as well as I am now. Right, and that's me being completely honest.

Krystal Jae: 31:42

Relationship with God, having coping mechanisms and techniques, is what's getting me through this difficult time, because I know how to communicate. I know how to take breaks when I need to. I know when I need to kind of take time. I know that when I don't feel like going through that, I need to just go ahead and pray, or it may be a break, or maybe that I need a journal, or maybe that I need to listen to watch my vision video. Right, all of these coping mechanisms, these tools and my intimate relationship with God is what's getting me really through all the disappointments, the storms and, again, the loss of my beautiful sister, beautiful inside and out. That's what's getting me through, and so I can sit here and be like, oh God, I hate God, but I don't. I love him. I know he loves me and I know that he loves my sister and I know that she's in a better place.

Krystal Jae: 33:13

Right that, through all the different points of trauma that I have experienced, all the different points of trauma that you have experienced, that we have experienced those things, but one thing I know for sure is that God is not our trauma. He's not. So if you have not accepted God as your savior or if you want to gain him as the leader in your life, let him know. All you have to do is ask him for forgiveness and accept him as your Lord and Savior. God, it's me, crystal J. Please forgive me, help me to be better, help me to build this intimate relationship with you, lead me, guide me, show me your way, in Jesus name, amen. So I want to thank you for listening to Overcome, suffering in Silence with me, crystal J. Now, did you know that I, crystal J, I have a program that will help you build your relationship with God while learning to overcome the limitations of trauma, discover who you are authentically, while elevating your career, social and personal life? Did you know that? You know that Now, if you are ready to go deeper, I want you to go to wwwkrystaljae. com.

Krystal Jae: 35:33

Forward slash book dash online. That is www . krystaljae. com/book-online and schedule your program consultation.

Krystal Jae: 35:47

Now you may have went through this episode and been like Krystal. You know what. This was OK, and you're talking about God, and right now I'm not there, so I'm not sure about joining a program that has God in it. Then you know what that's fine. I'm not here to judge at all, and I have a program for you as well. You don't have to have that God piece in there, okay, have that God piece in there, okay.

Krystal Jae: 36:27

And one more thing. I want y'all to go ahead and share this episode with at least three individuals that you would like to empower. Now, believe in all that you are and know that there is this inner power within you that is greater than any obstacle and, as 2 Corinthians 1, 3-5 states, all praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. God is our merciful Father and the source of all comfort. God is our merciful father and the source of all comfort. He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others when they are troubled. We will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us, for the more we suffer in Christ, the more God will shower us with his comfort through Christ. See you next time.