Ep. 42 The Body's Wisdom: Listening to Your Inner Self

****Thank you for going through this elevation with us. After this episode everything will be "Who Am I with Krystal Jae"****

After years of living under the weight of tension and unease, I discovered a life-altering truth: we are not broken.  Join me, Krystal Jae, as we embark on this journey of personal growth, learning to turn pain into purpose. Through my Empower Transformational Healing framework and the ODE method—Overcome, Discover, Elevate—you'll find the tools you need to break free from old patterns and embrace an unstoppable version of yourself.

Our bodies hold untold stories and unspoken truths, acting as a compass to our authentic selves. This episode reveals how listening to these bodily cues can transform anxiety into stability and guide us toward purposeful living.

 Through a somatic exercise, we explore how to release physical tension and uncover unspoken truths, paving the way for profound personal transformation. 

You can gain free access to the first module of my Breakthrough to Authenticity program, which offers invaluable insights into reshaping early experiences and reconnecting with your true identity.

Imagine a life where speaking your truth improves mental and physical well-being—it's possible. By understanding the body's language, we set boundaries, achieve clarity, and foster a more fulfilling life. 

Whether you're looking to leave toxic situations or pursue postponed dreams, this episode invites you to embrace authenticity. I invite you to discover the special gift of accessing the first module of the Breakthrough to Authenticity program, a step towards a life filled with clarity, love, and purpose.

"Overcome Suffering in Silence with Krystal Jae" is on its own empowered transformational healing journey, and this episode will mark the elevation to "Who Am I with Krystal Jae." Continue to tune in to each episode as I focus on bringing you solutions to empower you to Elevate your life with success and fulfillment by Overcoming barriers and Discovering your authenticity to unlock potential with a plethora of tools, skills, and resources.

Chapters

• 0:01 Transformation and Personal Growth Journey
• 5:41 Unmasking the Path to Authenticity
• 22:31 Listening to Your Body's Truth
• 29:16 Discovering Your Authentic Self
• 36:21 Embracing Authentic Living Journey

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:01

You know that feeling when something just feels like you're living your life doing all the right things but deep down your body is telling you there's more conversations. Or the hairs coming up on the back of your neck or on your arm, or that tension, headache that just won't go away. Or perhaps it's that constant feeling of being on edge, waiting for the other shoe to drop. It could be that, that feeling of uneasiness that just won't go away. You see, I know that feeling intimately. I used to be the queen of putting on a brave face while suffering in silence. And today I'm sharing something special with you Not just another episode, but a transformation of our journey together. You know what fascinates me most about transformation? It's not just about changing, it's about becoming who you were always meant to be. That's right, who you are meant to be. Who are you? Are you still asking yourself? Who am I? Then? This is for you. I remember standing in front of my mirror wearing what felt like a thousand different masks the quiet girl, the people pleaser, the student with so much drive, the person who wasn't social. And my body back then was literally screaming with tension, holding on to every unspoken word, every suppressed emotion, and just like you might be feeling right now. I knew that something had to change, because I knew that something was missing. But here's what nobody tells you about transformation at least no one told me. But transformation is not about fixing what's broken because you were never broken to begin with. It's about shedding the layers that were never truly yours.

Speaker 1: 2:45

I I'm Crystal Jane, the who Am I expert, the empowerment goddess and your certified somatic trauma-informed coach. I'm an author of Empowered Women, inspired Vision and the Empowerment Coloring Book for Women. And, and today we're diving deep into something that might completely shift how you see your journey. You see, transformation isn't just about changing who you are. It's about returning to who you were always meant to be. Just like a butterfly doesn't carry the weight of its cocoon after it emerges right, you too can learn to transform your pain into purpose, your fear into faith and, yes, your trauma into triumph, and going from unwanted to unstoppable. On this empowered, transformational healing journey, this isn't just another episode about healing. This is your invitation to something so, so, so much bigger.

Speaker 1: 4:02

Whether you're feeling sick of being stuck in a cocoon of old patterns or you're just starting to feel those wings of possibility flutter, what I'm about to share could be the key to unlocking your next level of transformation. And if you're thinking, I've tried everything, what can you tell me different? Because if it's out there, I've tried it before. Well, that's exactly why you need to hear this. And if you know someone else who is thinking that way, they need to hear this too. So you know someone else who is thinking that way, they need to hear this too. So share this with them now, so they can tune in and gain the knowledge, because sometimes the most powerful breakthrough comes when we least expect them, but when we most need them. So we're going to bring along our family, our friends, our co-workers, your neighbor and you're going to share this episode with them. Because I'm going to share that with mine, because this isn't about me alone and it's not about you alone, but it's about making a true difference in as many lives as we can.

Speaker 1: 5:41

So let's start with a truth that might feel uncomfortable. Your body holds every story you never told, every boundary you never set and every truth. You've been afraid to speak. But here's the beautiful part it also holds the key to speak. But here's the beautiful part it also holds the key to liberation.

Speaker 1: 6:09

Today marks a new chapter in our podcast journey, one that truly reflects why I do what I do, the why it's also going to mark how I can serve you better. You see, my story isn't just about overcoming barriers. It's about discovering who you truly are, beneath all those layers of shoulds and expectations. It's about finally understanding why you feel what you feel and, more importantly, how to transform those feelings into your greatest power. Now, through my proprietary framework, the Empower Transformational Hume and the ODE method Overcome, discover, elevate I've helped countless women and a few men move from feeling anxious to feeling anchored, living on autopilot mode to living with purpose, from people pleasing to peace, finding suffering in silence to speaking and living in their truth. So what if I told you that all those sensations in your body, the racing thoughts, the sleepless nights, the overwhelming emotions, aren't signs that something's wrong with you. They're actually your body's wisdom trying to guide you home to yourself. Yeah, and today I'm not just sharing insights, I'm giving you your first step towards transformation.

Speaker 1: 7:46

I'm excited to share with you module one of the Breakthrough to Authenticity program. Now module one is about barriers and their effects on our neurological system. In this powerful two-week module, you'll discover how early experiences shape your current responses, understanding your unique connection style, practical somatic tools for releasing stored tension, daily practices for building safety and trust, ways to begin reconnecting with your authentic self. And if you have never connected with your authentic self, you will. Starting with this module, and when you register today at wwwcrystaljcom forward slash sneak peek that is wwwcrystaljcom forward slash sneak peek You'll receive an in-depth video lessons. There's several lessons in there, y'all, and they're in depth, okay. A comprehensive workbook for module one. Now, with the whole program, you get the workbook and reflection exercise and so much. But this is, this is going to be a gift, y'all, right, so you're going to get that section for module one. We're still including that, okay, because there are some powerful exercises in there for you. You're going to get guided somatic practices, daily integration tools, so that way you can really begin your step towards empowered transformational healing. So take this time to save the free module one access and share it with your group chat and on your socials. And again, that's at wwwkrystaljaecom forward slash sneak peek. Then, of course, it's time for you to download this episode for later, because you already know there's going to be some juicy tips up in here. Okay, hey, hey, welcome.

Speaker 1: 10:16

To Overcome Suffering in Silence. It's time for you to stop people-pleasing and create your better life. I am Crystal J, the empowerment goddess and your somatic, trauma-informed life coach. This season has already started in a way I couldn't even imagine. Now, are you ready for some realness, raw healing and a glimpse into what it feels like to walk in peace, clarity and purpose, while truly knowing who you are? If your answer is yes, then you've come to the right place.

Speaker 1: 10:49

For the past two decades, I've been blessed to share my journey with countless women and a few men, empowering them to overcome the lingering shadows of physical, emotional, psychological and sexual abuse. Together, we confront the limitations that hold us back, like self-doubt, guilt, fear, shame and that pervasive sense of unworthiness. Dig deep to uncover the root of these feelings. Break free from the inner pain of suffering and silence. Find faith, grow in that faith and embrace the life that is meant for you. Enjoy the real stories and practical advice, life-enhancing skills and spiritual wisdom to guide you from pain to purpose, self-doubt to confidence and confusion to clarity. So let's leave the struggle bus behind and embark on this journey to discover the freedom, beauty and strength that lies within you. Remember you are not alone and you are enough. When times get tough, pray, listen and follow through, because God loves you, and trust me when I say he is not your trauma. Welcome to Overcome Suffering in Silence.

Speaker 1: 12:06

With Crystal J, today I want to take you on a journey through three powerful truths that changed everything for me and my clients.

Speaker 1: 12:19

Part one the mask we wear. I said before how I wore a thousand masks right, showing up as what others expected me to be. Are you showing up in different parts of your life as what you think others expect you to be, instead of who you truly are? There were times to where I was showing up and I would be this bright-eyed and bushy-tailed woman or little girl, whichever way, and inside I was just like man. I'm not supposed to be here, this isn't for me, but I wanted to follow the lead of everyone else and be where the friends are or the family is or whoever. There were times that I would put on a smile when inside I'm just crying, and so we don't want you to continue to living with your mask on. There's no point in you continuing to live in that place of you. Know that feeling when you're smiling and nodding but your stomach is in knots and all queasy. That's not just anxiety, again. That's your body's wisdom speaking to you.

Speaker 1: 13:47

I remember being the ultimate people pleaser, always saying yes, always being fine, always wearing that mask of perfection. But here's what I didn't realize Every time we wear those masks, our body and mind pays a price. So think about it for a moment that tension, headache after forcing yourself to attend an event that you dread, or the digestive issues when you're pretending that everything is okay. The shoulder pain from carrying the weight of others' expectations Girl, I know that shoulder's tired or are you someone who carries it in your back? Think about it. Your body knows when you're not being authentic. It's like wearing shoes that don't fit and you, eventually you start limping because your feet hurt.

Speaker 1: 14:58

Part two breaking up with silent. That's why, at first, this podcast was called transformational healing. But that's why I got changed to overcome suffering and silence, because of because I know on my journey, that's the main thing, one of the main things that I overcame, and I know that countless have overcame the suffering and silence because that lingers. We may show up and be like, oh, we're being bold and we're very blunt and we're very outgoing, or you may be showing up as being shy or antisocial. But either way, whether you're on the very social end and being blunt or you're antisocial and being quiet, or a mixture. You're still suffering in silence Because on the inside, you feel agony, you feel pain, you feel sadness, you feel shame, you feel guilt, you feel confusion, you feel loneliness, you feel guilt, you feel confusion, you feel loneliness, you feel fear, you feel abandonment. But you don't have to continue to continue living in that suffering and silence moment. Yes, it may seem like, oh, that's just how life is, but y'all, it gets better. And I know, because I'm telling you, because I went through it personally and I've walked other people through it. That's how I know what I share with you are proven methods that work.

Speaker 1: 16:41

I don't just throw something out of the air and be like oh, can I say this? No, I've tried it, or my clients tried it, or we tried it together. They're proven to be able to work. You just got to find the right thing for you work. You just gotta find the right thing for you. So let me tell you about one of my clients. Um, let's call her maya. She came to me believing that life was just life and there was no better way to live life than to just go with the motion. She was content, she was okay in her relationships and she just said that she was just waiting for her husband to find her. So I asked her what does she like to do? And she was like, oh, I'm a homebody I don't really like going out with friends and stuff.

Speaker 1: 17:28

sometimes they drag me out and sometimes I just go, so that way I don't have to hear their mouth for me not going. I just I was like, oh okay, well, how's work? Uh, work is okay, you know, I, I like it. It's bringing in the money, that's all that matters. It pays the bills for me and my kids and I was like oh, that's all that matters.

Speaker 1: 17:49

You know, you just said that you like it. It's not like it's a passion, or you're really in love with it or something that you really love to do, or you know what, how do you feel about that job? She was like, honestly, I really want a career in. I forgot what it was, and so I told her I was like well, why don't you have a career or not? And I remember her saying that she would have to go to school and she didn't have the time. I said, okay, we'll put that on the back burner and we'll work our way to that. And she looked at me and I'm like yeah, I know. And so then I asked her okay, so what do you like to do? I like to y'all. I like to get to know you, because if I'm going to truly help you on your journey, I got to know what you want in your life. Right, what are we working towards? And so she was like she's also been wanting to leave her home state, but everyone around her had been telling her that she wouldn't make it if she left and went where she knew it, where she didn't like. So she said that the main thing bothering her was that she was too scared to speak her mind and that she had seen some of my content about being able to finally speak my truth and that's what brought her to me. Okay, she said that she noticed, look, when she would try to join conversations or people being shocked, that she had a sense of humor whenever she did jump in. But she also knew that if she spoke her mind, that some people would not like what she had to say, say, because, remember, she was still doing things to please others and not necessarily speaking her truth or speaking her mind, telling them that, no, she'd rather go and do this, or that, no, she doesn't want to go, or throwing her ideas out there. Right, she said that she was used to living life this way. You know her and her kids. They had a routine and it just is what it is. Life was just laughing and she was just along for the ride.

Speaker 1: 20:07

She began to do the work to overcome the barriers that were in her way. She started implementing some of the skills that she learned, but her favorite was finding her voice. She learned to communicate healthy with her children, her family, her friends, her co-workers and with strangers. She started setting boundaries and communicating them and explaining to people why she needed said boundaries. Now, there were a couple of messages during this time. Y'all, there was some messages, and I'm always. Anytime that we're working through this and I'm helping people setting boundaries, I'm expecting messages because I know how difficult it can be for when we first start setting those boundaries, because, y'all, it's not I'm not going to lie it's not always easy, but the most important part is for us to communicate our boundaries in a healthy way, explain why we have those boundaries and, if they're not respected, what we are willing to do to protect ourselves to where we, to where our boundaries are also protected and respected really, okay. And so you know, we talked several times about different people crossing her boundaries and how she can come back to them and do like a reminder of her boundaries. Then she would reach out and we will talk about it or we'll message about it. Okay, because it's about giving you supports where you're truly not alone in this journey. Okay. Now, once she was able to see that people was really starting to come around and respect her boundaries, she was so proud of herself for finally standing up for herself, but also for finally deciding what her boundaries were and then communicating them with others and sticking to right. That's the hard part is sticking to them, because people don't always respect them and sometimes it's easier for us to just be like you know what, whatever, forget it, do what you want to do, you know, and just throw our boundary out, but no, we're keeping our boundaries. Okay.

Speaker 1: 22:31

Now here's what happens when we stay silent. Right, let me know if any of these relate to you. You know, you get that frog in your throat. Right, your throat gets all tight, or it feels like you have something in your throat. Your shoulders creep up. Our stomach be all, and not the arms on your well, either here on your arms or the back of your neck stands up. If you have hair in one of those places, right, some people their jaw clenches. Your heart may raise, your breathing may get shallow, or you may notice that you're breathing a lot faster. Right, it's different. It's a little different for everybody, but when we're experiencing this, your body is saying please let me speak my truth, please let me be. So.

Speaker 1: 23:38

After I learned to speak her truth, you know what happened. She started setting boundaries. People started respecting those boundaries. She stuck with those boundaries and guess what? Her mind was clear, she had less headaches, that that frog in the throat gone, her body started to relax and she started leaving her house and doing more than what she was doing before. Her friends appreciated that she was actually coming out and socializing. They were liking the version of her that she was actually coming out and socializing. They were liking the version of her that she was stepping into. She liked that she was actually out socializing instead of being consistently in the house. So that's why it's important for you to learn to speak your truth.

Speaker 1: 24:35

Part three we're going to talk about the language of liberation. Now, right now, wherever you are, I want you to try something. Okay, okay, ready. So I want you to wherever you are, except for if you're driving. Don't do this. If you're driving, or if you're riding the bike, or if you're out for a run or you're in the store, don't do this. Look your somewhere to where you can really relax, okay, or go to the store and I'll sit in the car for a little bit before I will come in. That's you, that's perfect time, okay, so you're right, this is what I want you to do. I want you to take a deep breath. Take another deep breath One more. I can now do it with my eyes closed. If you can't, you can go ahead and close your eyes as well. Usually, when I close my eyes, I can focus more. So let's do it again. Take a deep breath One more time. Take a deep breath Now. Where do you feel tension? Deep breath.

Speaker 1: 26:11

What are you not saying? Deep breath in and out. So you grab in and out. What would your body feel like if you could be completely honest? Breathe in, breathe out.

Speaker 1: 26:36

You see, your body speaks in sensations and once you learn this language, everything changes. That's what I really like about somatics it's because we're really focusing on our body and what's being held in our body, because our body speaks to us and we go deeper into that in the program. But your body speaks to you. A lot of times we'll get signals from our body before we even process it in our mind. So here's some signs your body is speaking. It's true, you have a sense of expansion in your chest. Your shoulders start dropping away from your ears, okay. Your breathing starts flowing easily and energy it moves freely. Now it's a great thing. But just taking a simple breath in, deep breath in and blowing it out if you don't even gotta hold it and closing your eyes and just focusing on your breath and asking yourselves those questions where do I feel tension? What am I not seeing? What will my body feel like if I was completely honest? Ask yourself the questions that you've been wanting to know. Just close your eyes and breathe in and breathe out and breathe out.

Speaker 1: 28:18

Now, when we start listening to these messages, remarkable things can happen. I've seen clients finally leave toxic situations. I've seen clients start businesses or start nonprofits that they've been dreaming about. I've seen clients go for that promotion that they've been dreaming about. I've seen clients go for that promotion that they've been wanting. I've seen clients move locations. I've seen clients just start living in their truth and embracing who they are and overcoming the barriers that are getting in their way and honestly not letting trauma rule their life. They find that they are in less pain, that they found their voice, that they can reconnect with their joy, that they can have happiness and peace and clarity and purpose. So here's another practice that I would like for you to try. Okay, it's called truth in the body, okay, so I want you to place one hand over your heart and take three deep breaths.

Speaker 1: 29:55

Notice what arises when you're doing this, when you're taking a breath. What are you feeling? Are you getting any images, any words or any phrases? What is your body doing?

Speaker 1: 30:10

three, four three more times. So I want you to go and I want you to write down what you just went through. How did you feel, what sensations came up, what images, what words, what phrases, how did you feel? Write it down, it's for you. So, doing this, I want you to remember that your body reactions aren't wrong. They're information. That anxiety is telling you that something is out of alignment, that exhaustion is most likely telling you that you need to set some boundaries.

Speaker 1: 31:29

Yeah so, if you haven't yet, save this episode so you can try these exercises at the appropriate times for you, write down these steps. Yes, I want you to also notice that during these exercises I didn't say breathe in for five, hold for four, breathe out for eight or any of that. I did that because these is for you to just really be one with your body and experience and listen and feel it. And so my deep breath may be different than your deep breath, because a lot of times when I first start, I'm taking those real deep breaths, but then I may get to an area of my body and it's telling me I'm taking a shorter breath, still deep, but shorter. Or I take a long deep breath and blow it out slow, but it changes when you're going with the flow, with your body. Embrace that. Okay, now you know.

Speaker 1: 32:55

When I started overcome suffering, silence, I knew it was the beginning of a rebrand and that's why in the last few months it went from Empowered, transformational Feeling to Overcome Suffering and Silence, and now we're finding our home, and that home is who Am I with Crystal Jane? So if you've been looking me up with Overcome Suffering and Silence, it's time to put who Am I with Crystal Jane. Always just put Crystal Jane. So if you've been looking me up with Overcome, suffering and Silence, it's time to put who Am I with Crystal Jane. Always just put Crystal Jane. You already know your girl's gonna come up.

Speaker 1: 33:18

Okay, this podcast is on this transformation journey, just like a little. I'm just really excited to announce that it's going to be evolving into the who am I with Crystal J, and the reason for that is because that's my why. My why is to help you find who you are. I've said it many times that's the one of the best things I've ever done for myself was to find who I am, embrace it and start living in it. Best thing ever. I've witnessed my children embrace who they are and live in it, and it's magical. I wouldn't give it up for anything. I want that for you, I want that for others and that's why we are going to who Am I With Crystal Jane. It's about the why. It's more than a name change. It's a deeper commitment to guiding you through your own empowered, transformational feeling journey. It's a deeper commitment to helping you to find who you are. So if you're asking who am I, you're in the right. Or if you're saying I don't know who I am. You're in the right place. You know people who are saying that Send them over so they can be in the right place. I'm going to really make sure that every episode, every story, Every tool that I share Is designed to help you move forward in answering that question of who am I? Who am I really? I'm here to guide you through the ODE method, to help you overcome your barriers, discover your authentic self and elevate into your fullest potential.

Speaker 1: 35:45

And speaking of transformation, remember that special gift that I promised last week and that I mentioned earlier in the episode. Well, for the first time ever, I'm opening the doors to give you a sneak peek into my proven signature Breakthrough to Authenticity program. You'll get complete access to module one barriers and their effects on the neurological system. You're like girl. What is that about? Let me tell you. So.

Speaker 1: 36:21

This free module is for you if you're tired of feeling disconnected from yourself. You sense there's more to life, but something is holding you back from finding out what that more is. You're great at taking care of others, but struggle to extend that same care to yourself. You want to understand why certain situations trigger triggers your body Right and you're ready to move from just going with the flow of life be lifing to really living your life with your purpose and your passion. Now to claim free access, all you got to do is go to wwwcrystaljcom, forward slash, sneak peek. That's wwwcrystaljcom right now. Go claim it now and complete it.

Speaker 1: 37:33

Okay, because, honestly, y'all, I don't know how long I will have it available for free. This is the first time I'm ever giving a module and this first module is a powerful module and let's give you a little glimpse come in, it's two weeks, take it, the full module is going to be available to you now. I am going to give y'all a disclaimer now. When you're in the full program, you don't only get the in-depth videos, you don't only get the, the workbook activities, but you also get me one-on-one every week and with some people they get me in between sessions via messaging. So, since I'm giving this to you for free, you won't have direct access to me. You won't have the weekly session, but there is an option to upgrade to have me in there with you, but we'll talk about that at another time.

Speaker 1: 38:47

Right now, the most important part is for you to go take advantage of this first module. It's in-depth, it's several lessons. You already know If I'm giving you tools on my podcast. You already know there's tools in the modules, so go check it out Again. It's wwwstaljaecom. Forward slash sneak peek crystal. Jcom forward slash sneak peek. Share this with a friend, share this with family, put it on your social media pages, post it in your group chat.

Speaker 1: 39:26

Look, we're here to help everyone live their life authentically as themselves, helping them overcome the barriers, discover who they are, so they can unlock their potential, so they can live their life that is full of love, full of clarity, full of purpose, full of their values, because all of that doesn't affect just you as an individual. It causes a ripple effect among the people around you, in your home, in your church, at your work. I've seen it, I've lived. So check out module one. It's yours For free. So remember You're not alone. And, yes, there is a better way To live life. So embrace it. Hold on, remember you're not alone and, yes, there is a better way to live life. So embrace living your authentic life, because it truly elevates everything that's important to you.