Let's Talk Midlife Crisis Podcast
Hosts Ashley & Traci are creating a community and empowering women going thru midlife and aging, exploring the topic of midlife crisis an all its complexities. This is a space where we can come together to share our stories, our experiences, and our perspectives on this pivotal moment in our lives.
Whether you're going through a midlife crisis yourself, going through menopause, dating in midlife or just interested in learning more about this fascinating topic, we invite you to join us for insightful conversations with experts, personal stories from real people, and practical advice on how to navigate this challenging time.
Our goal is to create a community where we can support each other through the ups and downs of midlife, and help each other find meaning, purpose and fulfillment in the second half of our lives.
So buckle up and get ready for an engaging and thought-provoking journey into the world of midlife crisis. We can't wait to share this adventure with you!
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Let's Talk Midlife Crisis Podcast
Navigating Midlife Mood Swings: Emotional Well-Being During Menopause and Perimenopause
Do you ever feel like you're on an emotional rollercoaster, especially during midlife? Discover how hormonal changes, such as menopause and perimenopause, can profoundly impact your emotional well-being. In this episode of Let's Talk Midlife Crisis, we share personal stories and expert insights on the disruptive nature of these mood swings, and how they can affect both daily life and work. Learn how external stressors and major life transitions can amplify these emotional shifts, leading to increased irritability and anxiety, particularly for women in the workforce who might feel isolated.
Transitioning to new jobs can be overwhelming, especially with the added complexity of virtual onboarding. We discuss the stark contrast between the excitement of youth and the anxiety that comes with career changes in later years. Listen as we delve into the physical and emotional symptoms that accompany midlife changes, such as mood swings and sleep disturbances. Understand the importance of recognizing these symptoms and seeking support, and how open communication with loved ones can help navigate these challenging times.
Managing menopause symptoms doesn't have to be daunting. Explore practical strategies ranging from hormone replacement therapy and antidepressants to mindfulness practices like yoga and meditation. We highlight the significance of maintaining a positive mental state and the benefits of cognitive behavioral therapy. Connect with support groups and online communities, and discover resources like Hello Bonafide for midlife health products. By fostering a community of shared experiences, we emphasize the importance of communication and mutual understanding in making this transition more manageable for everyone involved.
Resources as mentioned in the podcast for supplements:
https://hellobonafide.com
Additional Resources:
Mayo Clinic - Menopause: Symptoms and CausesNational Institute on Aging - Menopause: Tips for a Healthy Transition
American Psychological Association - Midlife and Menopause
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Hello and welcome to let's Talk Midlife Crisis with your hosts, ashley and Tracy. Pull up a chair for your seat at the table as we talk about mood swings and just thought it would be a good topic to cover. No matter what stage of life you're in, I think everybody battles mood swings. Um, you know, and it's incredibly relevant for women and, uh, their families, as hormonal changes and life transitions and external stressors can significantly impact emotional well-being. I feel like I can't talk right now.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I was thinking about that a little bit when you said you wanted to do this topic and just how it's relevant to midlife. You know specifically, and you know not just the changes we're going through physically, but also you know the and you know not just the changes we're going through physically, but also you know the things we're dealing with in our life, and I find myself sometimes, you know, going about my day and I'm fine, and then I remember like this thing that's happening in my family at the time and it just weighs me down. It's like, okay, I got to get back to where I was, you know. So it's kind of it can be up and down throughout the day and sometimes it's just down all day.
Speaker 1:Yeah. So, yeah, and I get annoyed, I think, and anxious pretty easily sometimes, um, even though I'm post-menopausal, um, so I I don't feel like I'm having the hormone you know um, rollercoaster ride anymore, ride anymore. Um, but I still feel like last week I got super slammed, busy at work and just super irritable and anxious and it's like what's wrong with me right.
Speaker 2:Why is this happening? Just handle this like easy exactly you know, glide through, yeah, and it's funny too, like even, I think, before you go into midlife. I remember sometimes when I didn't realize I was about to start my cycle for the month and I would start crying about nothing you know, and I'm like what's wrong with me? And then it's like oh, I'm gonna start my period.
Speaker 1:Yes, yes and I would cry watching it could be a commercial. Aspca always gets me.
Speaker 2:It's like as soon as I see it come on.
Speaker 1:I try to change the remote, because every time it gets me and I just start crying, it's like, oh my gosh what is wrong? With me.
Speaker 2:Or watching you know any kind of TV show you know that might have that emotion, yeah, sentiment in there, or sad, yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, emotions, yeah, yeah, yeah, um, but hormonal changes, of course, which we've talked about a lot, um, because it impacts you so heavily during, you know, midlife, but, um and I thought this was an interesting fun fact that studies indicate that up to 70 percent of women experience mood swings during menopause, perimenopause, oh, I believe that 70% I mean just from my own experience yeah. Yeah, and then and I don't have the stats, the data on it but the number of women in the workforce that are in menopause is staggering as well.
Speaker 2:Really, yeah Well, yeah, I guess that makes sense, I mean, if you think about the timing when women really started coming into the workforce and not staying at home so much. A lot of those women are now midlife or even just past that.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that makes a lot of sense.
Speaker 1:And again adding those extra stressors from work and, like I just mentioned, you know I used to be able to breeze through everything at the office or at work.
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 1:And deal with all of that, which some of it is just little things that are. I don't know why they irritate me.
Speaker 1:Whether it's somebody how they responded or they didn't respond or anything. It's somebody how they responded or they didn't respond or anything. And I'm waiting, you know, because I can't move forward on a certain task until I, you know, find out this. But, um, but yeah, in the workforce and hopefully a lot of women have other women, right, you know colleagues that they can talk to, or you know, support, support, be supportive and stuff. I was fortunate to have mostly women, you know, during my important years of my wackadoo hormones.
Speaker 2:you know Awareness really with. You know, like on the news and talk shows where they're, you know, trying to make people aware of the stage of women's lives, and that you know, like you said, a lot of them are in the workforce and everyone in the office kind of needs to understand. You know what's going on.
Speaker 1:Right, but you can't really talk about it.
Speaker 2:In the office?
Speaker 1:I never unless it was another female colleague or somebody that could understand and relate, yeah, but generally speaking, I always thought it was taboo, Right, Because when you're a female and you're trying to, you know increase, you know your career. Right career, right, um, and maybe, uh, climb the ladder if you will. I just thought that it was very unprofessional to one cry at work, like, never, like to me. That's.
Speaker 2:The worst thing I could ever do is to cry at work, right, um, but those types of things so yeah, I think, um, that's, you know, been we've talked about how that's been a problem for women in general just keeping quiet and not sharing and not, you know, yeah, we have this fear in us where it's like I can't be human. Yeah, I have to be, you know, robotic. I have to do my job and I have to do it well and not not appear to be human, right, terrible, right, you know, not appear to be human, which is terrible, you know or to appear to be female, because you know, when we first started out in our careers, it was still a very male dominant world right, and perhaps especially the grocery industry.
Speaker 2:Well, and advertising, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1:Definitely heavy male dominance there. So, um, but even you know, life's transitions too will add to that. Um, children leaving the home can be very emotional if you're an empty nester. Um, you know, I can. I'm waiting for that day. But then, when that day comes, I'm just trying to brace myself because it might be more emotional than I think it is it definitely is.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's a roller coaster. It's mood swings because you're very excited, yeah, and then you're very sad, and then you know it's kind of up and down and I would say, for even a little while after they leave it's still kind of an up and down thing until you finally just kind of get used to it. And it's like, okay, I'm okay with this now.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and again as we've talked about so many times. I feel sometimes it's just important to embrace your emotions, you know and just kind of let it out and feel it and feel it, um, then to try to not deal with it.
Speaker 1:But um, and something else that a lot of people um in midlife are dealing with is caring for aging parents. Oh yes, you know, and that can be very, very rough and emotional. I saw a post from bailey not too long ago and um, and she was having, not having not having a good day, you know and I can only imagine both of my parents have now passed, but it was crazy oh yeah, it was crazy trying to handle all of that yeah, yeah, fortunately I'm not not there yet, but right, we'll see.
Speaker 2:And not everybody does have to deal with that right?
Speaker 1:yeah, um, but I think a lot of people are, and especially there's some of them maybe are becoming empty nesters but now end up having to take care of well, yeah, as soon as my youngest moved out.
Speaker 2:My mom retired, yeah, and she lives up in Utah and she comes down now for winters and stays with me yeah and so it was like, okay, well, I got rid of my kids and now yeah, yes, yes, but yeah, that and you know, or anything, it could be career changes.
Speaker 1:We've talked about that a bit as well, especially trying to, you know, reinvent yourself in midlife, especially at that point in your life, yeah, yeah, I was just talking to a co -worker last week about it and and the fact that there was a position that intrigued my interest and I have a lot of people working for this particular. It's actually a platform, so it would be outside of the agency life but and more money, significantly more money. But the fear when I switched to this job, after you know decades of being with my old job and having it be remote, the onboarding was overwhelming, oh yeah.
Speaker 2:But also I started. It's challenging to do that virtually.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, and I had, because I knew what it, that it was going to be challenging. Just anyway, going in, I asked you know for what they had in mind for onboarding. You know how would it be structured and all that kind of good stuff before. But it was still overwhelming and I did start at a bad time, right in the middle of planning season, so it was literally feet first and but it was very, very overwhelming.
Speaker 1:So now I feel very confident. It's been a year and a half now that I've been there, so I'm very confident in you know, their processes and procedures and new platforms and stuff. But honestly, the thought of starting again with another company, it's overwhelming, just to think about it. So we had that conversation and it's like well, you know, do you not increase because there's a significant salary increase?
Speaker 2:yeah, but and it's you know we get comfortable. It's hard to get out of our comfort zones. That is very overwhelming. Yeah, can be make you very anxious. Yeah, but sometimes it's good for you know, usually it's good for us to do that.
Speaker 1:Yeah, change can be good, right, but, and I never seemed to bother me when I was younger, it was more exciting, was more exciting than it was overwhelming. So I think it's interesting how it makes me feel now, and my whole decision processing is way different.
Speaker 2:Much different. Yeah, it's just way different, I agree, I feel the same way.
Speaker 1:So, no matter what you're going through and stage you are in your life, just know that mood swings are common. They are, yeah.
Speaker 2:And they're okay.
Speaker 1:And it's okay, it is okay.
Speaker 2:You just got to feel it and then move on.
Speaker 1:And then, on top of hormonal changes and life transitions, you the biological factors, right. So that's, you know, beyond hormones, you know changes in neurotransmitters like serotonin, which we talked about a lot, and you know dopamine also play a big role. So because you know, if your balance in those chemicals are off again, um, that can help with um creating these mood swings right, yeah, absolutely just important to go to the doctor and get tested and and know again that it's not just you, right?
Speaker 1:and I am glad that there's so much talk now about women in midlife and menopause. Um, even just five years ago, oh yeah, right, like I feel it's, the doors have just opened, right up.
Speaker 2:It really has.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's great to see that everyone, high profile people, doctors and, like you said, even on the news they talk about it.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah, I've seen it come up several times, um, just watching the five o'clock news, you know. But yeah, I think, just taking care of yourself, you know, talking to your doctor, talking to your friends, yeah it, it's not something that people generally are open to talking about.
Speaker 1:It now, oh much more, much more, and recognizing the symptoms and understanding you know why you're feeling the way you're feeling, or at least recognizing, if you don't know why, at least recognize that you know some people and sometimes I didn't recognize when I was, you know, raging a little bit, or you know I had to have somebody say my kids are really good at pointing it out to me.
Speaker 1:Yes, yes, somebody else has to point it out to you. Um, but some of the you know emotional symptoms, um, you know irritability, sadness, anxiety, feelings of overwhelm, which we just talked about as an example, with me even thinking just the thought of changing jobs, um, just seemed to be so overwhelming. And then, you know, for two days later, I'm pondering why is this so overwhelming to me? What's my problem?
Speaker 2:what's my problem?
Speaker 1:and then, of course, there's physical symptoms too, which um hot flashes, night sweats, sleep disturbances outside of you know know, night sweats, um often accompanying mood swings, and for me I just remember waking up, just feeling gross and um and like you didn't sleep well and then on top of that, not sleeping well. Yeah, so very irritable Um.
Speaker 2:I think even you know people don't realize that even if you don't wake up in the middle of the night, if you're not sleeping well, if you're experiencing physical things, or even mental, um, you know it, it can still affect how deep you sleep or how well your your body's rested. So even if you didn't wake up and you're like in the middle, of the night and then you get up in the morning and you're like wait, I just don't feel like I rested well, but I didn't wake up. That's another factor to consider, yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and the impact that it has on your relationships, which I think is super, super important. You know, know it can strain relationships with partners.
Speaker 1:you know your children and work colleagues right, um, I remember at that time I was dating someone and perhaps even living with them, but, um, and I remember having to say it out loud because I was thinking he must think I am a crazy woman, you know like it's like ping, ping, ping.
Speaker 1:My mood swings were just off of the charts and so I just had to explain it to him. We didn't talk a lot about it, but it was like this is what's going on and I am, you know, entering menopause and I'm trying to get my hormones balanced, but it doesn't seem to be working. And he was also very patient and kind in that regard, but would point out, you know my highs and lows and everything in between. So I don't I feel lucky, even though we're not together anymore, but I don't think that it was too much of a strain on the relationship. Yeah, but, like I said, I definitely tried to keep their communication lines open. It's so important, um, to let them know, like I don't know why I'm acting this way you know sorry, what did I just snap at you?
Speaker 1:right, you know like I don't know why maybe I didn't even realize I was doing it. So, and as we always, always talk about diet and exercise, diet and exercise are so important and sleep hygiene so right, you've had even take care of yourself. Several episodes on that, on how to you know sleep if it's. You know all the various things and maybe even having an app that you know has sounds, calming sounds calm, calm, right, isn't that enough?
Speaker 2:yeah, it is. Is that enough? So, yeah, they have sounds, they have meditations. Um, they have a lot of different things, and I actually have a sound machine that you know. You can play various sounds on it and sometimes I'll get in bed and think what, why am I having a hard time getting settled? And it's like, oh, I forgot to turn the sound machine there, you go and suddenly I'm fine and that works.
Speaker 1:That works. Do you take it when you travel?
Speaker 2:um, no, generally I'll just play something on my phone when you travel, but as long as there, I mean if there's a fan or something just white noise right is you're right really okay for me. Um a lot of people like to do like thunderstorm or you know, water, it's, you know, waves, things like that.
Speaker 2:But as long as I have something, if there's nothing in the room making a sound, then I'll just play my phone, you know? But um, but I do. I mean, I even have one in the guest room for when people come to visit because I just thought well, if anyone's like me, then they, you know, they would want something like this so, and a lot of people use it when they come.
Speaker 1:So wow, that's awesome. That's awesome. Um, and then, of course, there's medical interventions. You know, hormone replacement therapy. Um, for some it works. Some women are open to it, some women are not open to it. Yeah, but everybody's different. Just figure out what works for you, and it could even be severe enough to warrant antidepressants, right?
Speaker 2:Yeah, to warrant antidepressants right. Yeah, and I think a lot of people I've talked to several people who are starting to go through menopause or in the middle of it or even coming out of it, who have been put on antidepressants and they were so confused about why and um, but you know, they trusted their doctor and they said, okay, I'll give this a try. And then you know, six months down the road, it's like I don't really think I need this Right, and they'll stop and go. Oh it was working.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it was really, I feel very different. It was really working, my doctor was right. I feel very different. It was really working, my doctor was right. So, yeah, I think that's one thing to keep in mind that if your doctor's prescribing it based off what you're sharing with them, it probably is necessary and hopefully you're open to trying that. Some people are against it and can find other ways.
Speaker 1:But if the other ways aren't working right and there's severe mood swings, perhaps, you know, consult with your doctor and see if there's something that's a good fit for you, absolutely, um, and to maybe just give it a try, right, I think at that point it might be, you know, it couldn't hurt situation, but right, um, it just depends on how severe those mood swings are. And then, of course, there's always therapeutic approaches, cognitive behavioral therapy, which we just recently did an episode on that. You know, it's just managing symptoms of depression and anxiety by changing negative thought patterns. That is so critical.
Speaker 2:It's hard to get sucked into that or not to get sucked into that, especially when you have you're in the mood swings and then the frustration because of it, and then you know it's just kind of snowballs, yeah. So you really have to check yourself and go okay, I'm not, I'm not putting myself there.
Speaker 1:I remember years ago, remember when the secret came out, the secret, the laws of attraction. I have made all of my children watch it. I just think it is so important because really you kind of do attract what you put out there and almost you know a mirror, you know if you're angry or you know anxious or whatever. I feel that it just you know you attract what you're putting out there, so yeah, yeah, I love the secret. I didn't quit my job, but I did do the journals and stuff.
Speaker 2:Oh right.
Speaker 1:Remember we talked about that and some of it came true and I didn't even realize it. Yeah, which is the same situation as one of the guys that was a speaker. I don't remember who, um, he was in the program.
Speaker 1:I think it was the guy that did the chicken soup for the souls books yeah um, but he unpacked a box when he was moving and found an old vision board and didn't realize that the new house he moved into was the same house that he tried to manifest. But, um, and mine was that way. I didn't paris blew my mind, because I didn't even remember that that was ever on my, on your list, on my list, but, and of course, mindfulness and medication or meditation, meditation we talked aboutitation.
Speaker 2:We talked about medication.
Speaker 1:Yeah, we talked about medication already, but meditation can reduce stress and emotional regulations. Again, yoga I think is probably one of the best ways to help control your mind, right, right. But yeah, the whole world lives up in your, in your head, right? So, yeah, I always tell my kids if you want to change your life, change your attitude.
Speaker 2:Yeah, because often I just think that that's what you're putting out there, and whatever is happening in your mind affects you physically to affects your body. So I think that's another thing where yoga really is beneficial yes because it's also really good for your body and just helping you kind of decompress and right yeah so yeah, 100 percent, um, and try to find support groups.
Speaker 1:Um. You know support systems resources. There are a lot out there. Yeah, um, it's just a point of finding one that you're comfortable with, and you can always reach out to us. We would love to hear your stories. Um so always on our social accounts anywhere. Um, we're on all of the platforms, but there are a lot of online communities. Um, I did find one that I thought was pretty interesting, um, when trying to prepare for this episode, and it's a website called hello bonafide um, and they they? Um sell of different products for midlife stages, if you will, everything from menopausal hot flash relief they actually have a pill for that. It's a little spendy, but they're highly rated and supported by a lot of reviews.
Speaker 1:Yeah, a lot of reviews and a lot of doctors actually support them, so um, but there are um, quite a few um, and there's actually one that is relief from mood swings and irritability oh, wow so, um, I thought that that was pretty interesting. Again, hello, bonafide. And um, the all of our resources will be in the description of the podcast, so it's easy for you to find. And um, they have a? Um a quiz on there.
Speaker 2:Oh, that's nice, so it can kind of let you know what products you should look for.
Speaker 1:Yes, yes, and I thought we would roll through a couple of these questions real quick. Um, because I started and I thought, oh, I bet it would be more fun than me just talking about it but then to roll through a couple of these questions. So one of them is what qualities are you looking for in a menopause product? And the selections are jeepers hormone hormone free.
Speaker 2:I can't talk today hormone free um quickly.
Speaker 1:Effective, high quality ingredients, easy to use and doctor recommended. I mean, I would say all of them. I'm just wondering, oh, you can pick all of them. That's great right, I'm like okay, everything. Um, what symptoms would you like to address? Um vaginal dryness, night sweats, vaginal odor, mood swings, fine lines and wrinkles where they cover the gamut yeah, they do. Um painful sex, low sexual arousal, vaginal infection, hair texture and volume and hot flashes. That's pretty interesting. Let's go with night sweats and hot flashes.
Speaker 2:I like that.
Speaker 1:And there you go, and then it's an email and then they're going to send you your results and what products that they offer that um heavily align with. You know the answers to your questions here. So just be honest. If you, you know, take it. Just be honest about it because, um, that way you'll be able to better align. You know, perhaps a supplement that'll work well for you, right?
Speaker 2:yeah, absolutely that's cool.
Speaker 1:But yeah, there are a lot of support groups and we're going to put a few of those in our description of our podcast for easy reference. And, you know, don't hesitate to seek help, you know, from a mental health professional if you feel that it's severe.
Speaker 2:Or just talk to your friends.
Speaker 1:Talk to your doctor um yeah, therapist or counselor or yeah, yeah, and somebody that specializes in midlife transitions as well. Right might be more helpful, and I don't know there's so much very out there too, bias but um prejudice, but I would. If I went to speak to somebody a counselor or a therapist I would want a female, yeah I just don't feel that a male.
Speaker 2:No, however clinical, I think it's nice to talk to someone that you feel can be relatable, you know exactly exactly could a male you know actually provide, depending on? Their the education that they have around it, I guess.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:They can't really relate, but they're aware. Yeah.
Speaker 1:But midlife mood swings can be challenging, but with the right information and support they're manageable. So you know if you have a partner, reach out to your partner, you know, or at least let them know that you're what you're going through and experiencing, so that you know. I think it would be better healthy relationship, you know, by sharing that yeah and that just about wraps it up for today. Thank you for joining us on.
Speaker 2:Let's talk midlife crisis embrace the change join the conversation on our website at letstalkmidlifecrisiscom, or our facebook or instagram and youtube channels. We'd love to hear from you guys.
