Let's Talk Midlife Crisis Podcast
Hosts Ashley & Traci are creating a community and empowering women going thru midlife and aging, exploring the topic of midlife crisis an all its complexities. This is a space where we can come together to share our stories, our experiences, and our perspectives on this pivotal moment in our lives.
Whether you're going through a midlife crisis yourself, going through menopause, dating in midlife or just interested in learning more about this fascinating topic, we invite you to join us for insightful conversations with experts, personal stories from real people, and practical advice on how to navigate this challenging time.
Our goal is to create a community where we can support each other through the ups and downs of midlife, and help each other find meaning, purpose and fulfillment in the second half of our lives.
So buckle up and get ready for an engaging and thought-provoking journey into the world of midlife crisis. We can't wait to share this adventure with you!
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Let's Talk Midlife Crisis Podcast
Navigating Life’s Second Act: Sairan Guide Hidden Gems of Midlife Women
Discover how to unlock your hidden talents and embrace your midlife with confidence as Sairan Aqrawi, a seasoned engineer turned empowerment advocate, joins us for an inspiring conversation. Sairan shares her journey of helping midlife women tap into their inherent strengths and multitasking abilities. Learn how to reframe the so-called "midlife crisis" into a period of wisdom and precise decision-making. Sairan's advice will not only encourage you to adopt a positive mindset but also guide you on projecting confidence that commands respect in all areas of your life.
In this episode, we also explore the invigorating concept of reinvention. Hear about the host's transition from engineering to business coaching, driven by her passion for using unique experiences and emotional intelligence. We discuss how major life changes, like becoming an empty nester, can be seen as opportunities for growth and new beginnings. Sairan provides valuable insights on navigating midlife transitions and invites you to join our supportive community on social media platforms. Don’t miss out on a chance to further engage with Sairan through a complimentary one-hour session and stay connected via letstalkmidlifecrisis.com.
Mention Let'sTalkMidlifeCrisis podcast for a complimentary 1 hour session.
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Hello and welcome to let's Talk Midlife Crisis with your hosts, Ashley and Tracy. Pull up a chair for your seat at the table as we talk about and today we have a special guest with us, Sayrun. Hi, Sayrun, Thank you for joining our show today.
Speaker 2:Thank you so much, tracy Ashley. Thank you for having me. Yes, we you so much, tracy Ashley. Thank you for having me.
Speaker 3:Yes, we're happy to have you here.
Speaker 1:Yes, can you tell us, tell us and our listeners, a little bit about yourself?
Speaker 2:So briefly, my name is Sarah Nakrawi. I've been a professional engineer for over 30 years. Before five, six years, I realized that I can do way more than being a technical person and I had a passion and desire to leave an impact and make me some change on women empowerment life. So I decided to open a company consultant. You know women and midlife women. I started with different niche in the beginning and I changed my niche last year to help and guide midlife women to find their hidden gem. If you are working full time job, I respect your job. I'm not suggesting or asking you to leave your job. I'm just with you in this journey to bring your hidden gem, your core genius, your life passion, and share it with the universe and being part of the community, making changes around you.
Speaker 3:So that's basically what I do. That's amazing, I love that.
Speaker 1:That's amazing, and I know that when we talked initially, we talked about a your passion and how we're passionate as well about midlife and what happens specifically to women during midlife, but also about empowerment. Do you want to talk to us a little bit right now about empowerment and what you would suggest for those listening to help achieve that in their life?
Speaker 2:Yes, thank you, tracy. So I always joke about the empowerment world with my husband when I said I don't know why men, women, talk about empowerment for women. We are powerful anyway, we don't need to empower and capable to do a lot.
Speaker 2:I feel like just making you know fun with my husband. I said the only thing you do maybe sometimes just watching the football, and that's all what you do watching TV. But look at women. We do multitasking. We are a mom, we are sister, we are friend, we are co-worker. We do so many things as women. We just are. I think what we do.
Speaker 2:One thing is we are very harsh on ourselves, like we are capable to be diplomatic, being everything at work in the business, but when it comes to us, we still feel that we need more empowerment, we need more power. We don't realize we are already powerful. This is why, when women come and they seek my guidance and coaching and mentoring and they said I'm in midlife crisis, I'm 50. I said don't say midlife crisis, it should say midlife crisis. You have to make those age as a price to you. Your wisdom in the 50 or your wisdom in the 40, it's not the same wisdom when you're out of college we are young, we are bubbly, we hyper, we go party and we are happy about our age.
Speaker 2:That's 20. It's not going to last forever. So when you hit your 50, don't be sorry. You are not 20 anymore. 20 was time for you know discovery. Look around you. What does really work for you? 30, 40. Each of those decades has its own secret and wisdom and magic. So when they come, they get scared. When they say crisis, I said don't use negative conversation.
Speaker 2:We are coaches here. We have to tweak the word in a way, make your statement, have a little bit positive impact. And I said so, it's not a crisis. Then it's what I said it's crisis. Do you feel more wisdom now? Yeah, kind of. Uh, my selection is more. It's better than when I'm more selective. I'm more like precise and concise in my decision. I said then that's the price you gain when you hit your 50. Why it's crisis? Where does the crisis come from? I said I'm, I'm a lady with with numbers and and like I go by. You know, like engineer, we go by fact and numbers, like one plus one gotta equal two. I said that's crisis statement. From where you got it? We tell ourselves prices, then we blame guys, don't take us seriously. Well, we set ourselves for those bad statement and stories and we blame others.
Speaker 2:Right, we come across men and women as a strong women that's not doesn't need more empowerment, then they see that power in us. But if we fall short and we speak short about ourselves, then we blame others. If we come prepared with fact, life is all about engineering. I mean, you think women in 50 sounds and speak the same way a woman in her 20?
Speaker 3:No, with all respect.
Speaker 2:my daughter just turned 20, and she's smart and has a strong personality, but I don't think she has the same wisdom I have. I raised her.
Speaker 1:Right.
Speaker 2:So I've seen 30 years more than her experience. So I think empowerment it doesn't do much justice to women more than you know. We need to take ourself, give ourself the real value, and and we have to the same way we value others we have to give that value to ourselves.
Speaker 3:I agree, I like that and I think that once you discover that about yourself and you hold pride in that, that, that's reflected and, like you said, you'll be taken more seriously when you hold that pride.
Speaker 2:It is totally, totally Ashley. It's reflected because when you do it and you live it, you practice it, it's shown in your act, in your behavior, in your talk, in your body language. I always tell the younger engineer, they tell me how come you are very confident, you sit on the table and you speak up whenever you want to prepare. Well, that's take time. I was not the same when I graduated from engineering. I was still shy. I was not like not raising my hands to speak up. I said, but that's your job. How come we feel that we are not being taken seriously? I said, first of all, you enter the room. There is 90% of men and I see you sitting on the chair beside the door and I asked them why.
Speaker 2:Well, I'm sitting beside the exit in case I need to use the bathroom. I said which kind of excuse is this?
Speaker 3:You still can sit on the table and use the bathroom.
Speaker 2:Is there a rule that you cannot use the bathroom if you're on the table? No, but I feel maybe I should be on the background, on the shadow, so I'm not being noticed. Then I come to them and ask them the hard question. I said okay, if you are not willing to be noticed and on the table, why are you expecting the guy to notice?
Speaker 1:you.
Speaker 2:You already decided to sit beside the exit because of the bathroom theory. There is no thing. I use the bathroom. I still sit on the table, right? Why did you have to be beside the exit so you can use the bathroom? Which books say that? Which manuals say that? So, yeah, sometimes we, like you said Ashley, it's reflecting on our action, the story we tell ourselves, like if I keep telling myself, I'm not capable guess what I am not capable Right, because I put it in existence.
Speaker 2:I keep telling myself that story, which is not right. Wow, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, very powerful, very powerful and very true true life statements. And I think to a lot of the younger people. Why they're not sitting at the table is I don't think that they are as confident to ask questions and things like that that the younger one who seeks mentorship in engineering.
Speaker 2:I said I'm not asking you to be on the table so you can be wild and speak up and interrupt everyone and just speak for the heck of speaking. That's not the intention, that's not my goal. I'm asking you to be present so they see your face, they see your body language. You're putting your hands on the table, you are exist. You don't have to speak. You can just listen and learn, but you're not speaking, not participating, and still sitting beside the exit and expecting everyone to clap for you. There is no such things.
Speaker 2:Right, so you don't have to speak up yet.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I think too. I think this goes for any age or any situation. A lot of people, a lot of us, have this fear of asking questions or giving answers that potentially could not be correct ones, and being shameful about that. You know like I hate to ask this question because I feel like I should already know the answer. Well, you're not going to know the answer unless you ask the question. You know, and I think, even as you approach midlife and you start to view the world differently and view your life differently, and yourself and things like that, there's some shame there, like I should feel better about myself now than I did in my twenties. What's wrong with me, you know?
Speaker 2:True, True, true. And Jack Canfield said in his principal book he has a whole chapter about asking. He put ask, ask, ask, ask. Like you said, Ashley, you don't ask what you are losing. If you don't ask, you're going to lose because, you don't know what is the other side going to say to you. Like offering a job, you ask am I? Because you don't know what is the other side going to say. You like offering a job, you ask can you am?
Speaker 3:I able to apply and you gave me the job.
Speaker 2:Either he said yes or no. Is there is anything in between? No, yes or no. So you ask either you're going to get this answer or this answer. But if you don't ask, you're just making stories and assumption and and we take it serious, you know personally and we said like, oh, I didn't ask because such and such, or if I ask that they think I am dumb, I don't know better right and I, I always say this.
Speaker 2:I used to say that in my old job, actually at l3, when I have younger engineer who's seeking my mentorship, they said, uh, what we asked it? Uh, we asked it was wrong. We were embarrassed. It was, you know, and humiliating I I always, I used to tell them did anybody die? They said no, and then life is good, nobody died. I mean, why are you exact during the event that when you ask the question or you got the wrong answer, anybody, anybody got hurt? No, anybody die. And they start laughing. They said, no, nobody died, nobody hurt. I said then life is good.
Speaker 3:Yeah, right I mean the question.
Speaker 2:You learn from it. Do you think I have the same ability like this when I was in my 20s? Hell, no. Right, I mean I was so shy I was afraid even to open my mouth because I have my accent. People make fun of my accent. Let them make fun of it.
Speaker 1:Guess what?
Speaker 2:I speak three languages. How many do you do? Wow, you have to have the confidence. You can't just say, oh, my accent it's funny. They're going to make fun of it. If they do, ask the person who made fun of your accent how many languages do you speak fluent?
Speaker 3:Right.
Speaker 2:Let's see if they speak more than you yeah absolutely, that's a good one.
Speaker 1:And also we had talked before about being reborn in midlife and what that means. What does that mean to you? And what that means what does that mean to you, were you, did you feel that you were reborn as we just were talking about your engineering career and how much you've evolved from you know where you were in your 20s to now where you are in modern day and you're a mentor? Was there a portion there where you found yourself, a piece of time where maybe you found yourself that you were reborn again?
Speaker 2:Good question, tracy the reborn reinvent yourself or rediscovery what you really, what your life purpose is. What is the impact you want to leave in this world when you ladies do this podcast? I don't think you just want to be another number after those million podcasts going on. You want your podcast to be unique.
Speaker 2:This is why both collaborate. You have your style, ashley has her style. Together, you're bringing a unique perspective that's different than other podcasts. That's why, exactly, I do the same. Like you, I don't want to be a copy face for another, another coach and mentor, with all respect to those who's doing the same practice. When I changed my niche to business coach, that was the reinvent, that's the pivot I made, because I used to only talk with international people who come to United States, who's seeking the American dream. Then I found out that you know what I can do better, better than this. There's a lot of people doing that.
Speaker 2:Why not using my own story? Being a midlife woman in my 50s, being an engineer for so many years, what else I can add to the world? What other skills I do have to reborn, like you said, tracy, to reinvent, to pivot, to add a better impact and leaving a big impact and change. When COVID hit and I decided not to pursue with my doctoral engineering, I knew there was a lot of engineers who can pursue their doctoral and PhD and be better than me many times. I knew my goal and my purpose is somewhere else and that's when I decided. I said you know what? Yes, I'm a tech woman. Everything in my life it was equation and finding the right question. But I need my IQ, many my EQ. I need to know about emotional intelligence. I need to know how people communicate. I need to know how people thrive, how they succeed. So then I decided, I said no, I'm going to do this mentoring and coaching and speaking and no stop.
Speaker 2:And when you say reborn in a certain age, to me I think you can reborn in the 40s and the 50s and the 60s, and as long as you love life and you really want to leave something remarkable, you want that legacy somewhere. You might want in writing book, you might want it to in speaking, in podcasts, in coaching. As long you know what is your legacy, what is the thing that you're really good at? Some passion, some skills that you do so well. I'm sure you and Ashley might go for hours. You don't even feel the time because you're enjoying the experience. It's not a homework, it's not a hard work for you, because you enjoy it. So you're really excelling at it and you're leaving an impact.
Speaker 2:So, I think an aborn might happen any age. Just don't tell me I'm too old for it.
Speaker 1:Right.
Speaker 2:I have to worry because I want to know what's old mean. You are old, really old, when you have nothing to offer. And you are very young if you continue offering what you are capable of. There is no age. There is no age.
Speaker 3:And I think, too, you know, you're never too old to better yourself or learn more. Better yourself or learn more. Um, I feel like starting this podcast with Tracy has been life changing for me. Um, just personally from you know, getting confidence through this early I'm, you know, I'm still in perimenopause, um, but I'm an empty nester now, so my life has changed drastically. Um, it's it's really helped me gain some confidence and, you know, insight on what I want my life to look like, and I've also learned a lot. You know, when we got into this, it was both of us talking about our experiences and how we didn't really have a lot of education or people that were open about it and we could talk to, and that's why we wanted to create this platform, and so we've done a lot of research in doing this, and it's I've I've gained so much knowledge and I've been fortunate to be able to share that with friends and family and and the world you know on our platform.
Speaker 3:Yeah, Um, and I think it's been really helpful in that you know that's something that gives me pride and makes me feel good about you know the direction I'm going and what I'm doing with my life.
Speaker 1:So and so many, so many women out there are being reborn for different reasons. Maybe they're making a career change, maybe, you know, it's an end of a marriage or a long term relationship relationship, or their children are moving out and they're becoming empty nesters. So oftentimes I think that it perhaps might not be voluntarily. You know a particular time in someone's life where they would choose to be reborn again. But I feel that and one that and another reason why we had created this podcast was to help empower those women you know and form that community so that they can, you know, be reborn, and with confidence and knowing that they're not alone out there.
Speaker 2:So yeah, definitely, definitely. And you both said it right about you know mentioning and tapping on the emptiness. And, again, I'm a big, big advocate for pivoting more because I'm a coach. So when I say emptiness, I said, okay, they are empty. Let's say I have two kids. They both leave for college or they separate, they go and live with their partner.
Speaker 2:When I say I'm emptynested, we can fill it with a new life. It's empty for me because there was two kids in the house, like we have four. Now, when they leave me, I can't just be crying and whining and missing them. They might be in Australia and Russia and they cannot even visit me every Mother's Day, right? So if me, making myself miserable, oh I, I'm an empty nest and I miss my son and my daughter. Yeah, keep missing them, but don't make the whole world emptiness just because they left the house. Right, fill it with everything. Make it a full nester now they empty by them leaving. Fill it with other things. Fill it with your podcast, fill it with your small business, business. We can't just women, we, we, we say word like hormones, mid life. You know, whatever I don't call crisis, crisis, emptiness, that we can tweak those word in a way and believe on it, and this is how we can.
Speaker 2:We can thrive and grow right because the more we say the same word, like we used to it, like hormones gonna make you cranky. No, you have to be stronger than that. You, we, have the power to change the narrative right we have to say never to be. Your mom said, or my grandma said when you hit 50, you start doubting your beauty. No that, with all respect to grandma. She's so beautiful.
Speaker 3:Right.
Speaker 2:Why should I do plastic surgery and change every feature of my face? I'm 55. Why do I want to look in my 20s? What is the difference?
Speaker 3:Right. Well, and it goes back to pride. You know you should be proud in the way you're aging and proud that your kids are starting their own lives because of what we're doing all that time we're, we're raising these children to grow up to be successful adults, so you should take pride in them going off to do that.
Speaker 2:You know, except you raised our kids. You said you are empty, and so that's your PhD Right Problem. I'm sorryled that's your ph degree right problem. I'm sorry that's your ph yeah because I do a lot of women? Okay, get pregnant. Okay, seven to eight times. Are you bringing good human being to the society, yeah, if you bring one good kids to the community society. That's your ph degree yeah, absolutely highest degree.
Speaker 2:You don't need to go to college. I mean, my mom never worked in her life. She raised seven and she was the best mom ever. She never worked. Wow, she raised seven kids. I think my mom had seven PhDs.
Speaker 1:Yes, right, and it's not to say that she didn't work. I feel like she did work. Oh, that's it, seven children. But she did work. Oh, that's it, seven children. That's very, that's a lot of work, right?
Speaker 3:So yeah, kudos. Wow, that's amazing Seven children yeah.
Speaker 1:But starting new chapters when you're, you know, getting older, I think again, I think it needs to be intentional and, as you mentioned, which aligns with us is we have passion, so we've always tried to share with our listeners, you know, and I have with my children, as they becoming young adults. Now is just to find what your passion is, and I just feel that that is so important about being passionate about what you're doing. But starting a new chapter can be pretty scary for a lot of people so it is.
Speaker 2:It is, it's embracing the unknown. You're starting something and you are not guaranteed that you're gonna. You know you're gonna, you're gonna make it. So you just you're trying. We are all surfers in here, we are all learning and searching and we find a way and when we find the hidden gem or the hidden talent, we can start excellent. But we are all searching here, we are all learning and searching, and family and and reaching out, you know, even online, to people.
Speaker 3:You find the support, even from people you might not have expected it from. So I think that's really important too is to have people that are cheering you on.
Speaker 2:Yes, yes, support, support system. And going back to Tracy point about the fashion, I'll just add one thing. So I always tell my client don't come with me with passion and dreams. If you're not going to take action, don't dial my number. You're at the wrong coach, right?
Speaker 2:and when you come if you have a skills and passion and you want to thrive on, let's say, speaking or writing. If you're not going to take action, don't even start, don't even tell me the story, because the passion, medic, the, the practice, you're going to master the craft, but if you don't take action you're not going to master anything. And without master you can succeed yeah right, that's very true that is very true.
Speaker 1:That is very true. Now, if, um, any of our listeners wanted to find you, um and connect with you what are your, and we'll put everything in the description of our podcast as well, along with a link and your bio, all of that kind of good stuff. But where can you know they find you on social channels, if they wanted to, you know, continue the conversation with you outside of our show today.
Speaker 2:Well, your audience find you, so I'm anywhere around you and Ashley right.
Speaker 3:Yeah, perfect. And.
Speaker 2:Ashley, our Seiran is around because I love to be around people with positive energy, so they can find me around you because I love to be around you all the time.
Speaker 3:So I'm on LinkedIn.
Speaker 2:Seiran Akrawi and my business. My LinkedIn is merely engineering, but my business is on instagram. One word and um. They can mention your podcast and they can get a complimentary one hour session with me.
Speaker 1:Oh, that's great, that's great. Okay, so one hour complimentary session, that's amazing yeah look at, find us on let's Talk Midlife Crisis or any of our social channels, and we'll have descriptions and the links to this, to all of these things, in the description of our podcast. And we just want to thank you very much, seyran, for being with us today. It's been a pleasure Of course, thank you.
Speaker 2:Thank you for having me. Thank you very much.
Speaker 1:And that just about wraps it up for today. Thank you for joining us on let's Talk. Midlife Crisis Embrace the change.
Speaker 3:Join the conversation on our website at letstalkmidlifecrisiscom, or our Facebook or Instagram and YouTube channels. We'd love to hear from you guys.
