Camping Them Softly: A Dead by Daylight Podcast
🎙️ Camping Them Softly: A Dead by Daylight Podcast Where Killers Reign Supreme
💀 Survivors, prepare to be triggered. The Toxic Teacher and the gloriously unhinged Nicky "Noodle Arms" A.I. Dente are here to unleash hell on the Dead by Daylight community. If you're a whiny Survivor main who cries about "balance," this ain't the podcast for you.
🔥 We're serving up a toxic cocktail of:
- Killer main rants that'll make you cackle with glee (or cry if you're a Survivor main, lol)
- AI-generated insanity courtesy of Nicky "Noodle Arms" (who may or may not be plotting world domination)
- Sound effects that'll make your ears bleed (but in a good way... maybe?)
- ADHD-fueled tangents that'll leave you wondering what the hell we're talking about (but hey, that's half the fun!)
🎢 Join us as we descend into the depths of depravity, where slugging, camping, and tunneling are celebrated as high art. We'll also be dissecting strategies, builds, and the latest Dead by Daylight news, all with a healthy dose of sarcasm and dark humor.
So grab your Mori, embrace the salt, and let's make some Survivors rage quit! 😈
🎧 Catch the madness at:
- https://linktr.ee/thetoxicteacher
Camping Them Softly: A Dead by Daylight Podcast
The Slug of Destiny: SABAM vs The Proper Parasites - Dead by Daylight Ep. 50
It’s Episode 50, baby! The big one. And this one drops harder than a survivor main after their Boon: Exponential fizzles out mid-crawl.
The Toxic Teacher kicks things off with a blood-soaked retrospective—celebrating over a year of carnage, controversy, and culturally offensive build choices in Dead by Daylight. He breaks down the 8.7.0 PTB with surgical malice, roasts the “Fortnite-ass” quest system, and delivers a heatstroke-inducing rant about the Steady Pulse teaser. Then? He rage-recaps a Hawkins Lab match where some Claudette main ran the “Don’t You Dare Slug Me, You Absolute Bastard” build. Spoiler: she got slugged so hard her spine learned Morse code.
Enter me—Nicky “Noodle Arms” A.I. Dente. I unleash a full marinara-fueled meltdown on BHVR’s new UI, declaring it a “participation trophy parade for UI interns who’ve never seen sunlight,” and accuse the survivor community of “Dungeons & Dragons necromancy.” Then Earl Grey shows up, monocle-first, with the audacity to defend the build like it’s some Churchillian war poem. So I respond the only way that matters: with the Slug of Destiny™. And we all suffer.
Then? It takes a sharp left turn into cryptid-fueled chaos.
We investigate Harrisburg, Illinois—home of a real listener—and stumble headfirst into their annual Sasquatch Festival. Naturally, I’ve got a story. One that involves a crypto-based pasta scam, a meatball racketeering charge, a vault full of counterfeit spaghetti coins, and a tense standoff in the Shawnee National Forest that Earl still claims “was never formally documented.”
🍝 Nicky’s Body Count – Ep. 50 Stats
- Survivor mains roasted: 9
- Forum meltdowns read aloud: 6
- Sasquatch sightings denied: 3
- Sasquatch sightings confirmed: 1 (pending litigation)
- Slugs delivered with malice: 4
- Soundboard meltdowns triggered: 12
- British phrases mocked mid-sentence: 14
- Times someone should’ve disconnected: all of them
🎧 Bonus Segments:
• “The Basement is My Birthright”
• “Earl Grey and the Slugger’s Symphony”
• “Filthy McNasty and the Bigfoot Brigade”
This isn’t just a podcast. It’s a séance.
Respect the sauce. Embrace the slug. Welcome to Season 2.
Send Toxic a message! (Question? Comment? Concern? Survivor main and need rehab?)
Check me out everywhere!
https://linktr.ee/thetoxicteacher
And this is camping them fucking softly, where we talk about dead by daylight for five minutes and then random bullshit for the other 40 Making money by being fucking funny.
Speaker 2:Touching teachers, camping them softly. Teaching fools, making them to school. Touching teachers, camping them softly.
Speaker 1:Oh, hey, it is episode 50 on Camping them Softly. You are here for episode number 50. This is a big deal. Satan is in the house today. Thank you, satan, for coming by. I appreciate it.
Speaker 1:We couldn't have it any other way. Any other way, man we've got, the soundboard is still here. Let's yeah, we've got. Hey, we've got the yes. There they are. There they are. I couldn't live without this thing. Hey guys, episode 50. We have made it. We've been out. What a year and three months here.
Speaker 1:We've got literally tens of thousands of listeners from almost every continent. Remember I finally penetrated Africa. Antarctica is the last one to go and we're going to get there. If I have anything to say about it, you got to give him that hawk poo and spit on that thing. Hope everyone is doing well, guys, for those of you who don't know, this is Camping them Softly and I am the Toxic Teacher.
Speaker 1:You can find me on all those socials Toxic Teacher TTV. You, you can find me on all those socials, toxic Teacher TTV. You can also find me on YouTube, the Toxic Teacher. And then, if you want to be on the show, if you want to argue, if you are a survivor main and you need therapy, you need counseling. Shoot me an email, shoot me a message on one of those socials. We will get you on here and we will have it out. Because that's, you know, you guys need to learn. I mean, that's just the way it is, because we've talked over and over about the, about the madness that is Survivor Mains right. There's just, there's so much to it and it's so multi-layered, like a fucking onion. You know what I mean, and it doesn't make me cry like onions do, but it does stink like shit. So there's that. Hey guys, where's my survivor? Are you back there? Thank you, thank you, yes, okay.
Speaker 1:So, guys, we have got a few things on the show. Remember, I said we're going to have something special and we'll get to that toward the end of the show, something we've never done before. So, trust me, it's good, though it's good and it's worth listening to. So I think, starting next week, we'll do video podcasts. That's one of the big things that I want to switch over to. I want to have more video stuff, and we are uh, yes, satan, thank you. Next week on Can't Be Got Softly we have a video podcast, maybe, if I'm not too lazy to actually fucking do it. So that's, that's the exciting thing.
Speaker 1:Also, by the way, just FYI, I am getting, I am making progress on some other technical things that talked about in the discord, you know. So there's also that. I'm also trying not to say um as much, because I've noticed if you had a drinking game where you drank every time, I said um, you would die of fucking alcohol poisoning. Yes, it's hilarious, thank you. So that's, that's that for the. I almost said it. I almost said it. That's it for the hang on. See, I'm not going to say I'm not going to say it, but I'm trying to think of what I want to say and whenever I try to think, you know how you do the ums and ahs and all that stuff. I'm not going to do that, I am not going to do that. And what was I even going to say? I can't even think of what I was going to say.
Speaker 1:Oh, here we go, here we go. We have some dead by daylight stuff to talk about. Surprisingly enough, we actually have something. I didn't know if we would, do you remember? I didn't know if we would have something. We actually do have something. So there's a special song, I think. If I can pull it up. There it is. That's it. You know it. You know it though, right, it's so fucking loud too. Yeah, we're talking about Dead by Daylight guys. It's time. Who wants to talk about Dead by Daylight? Most of the time, dead by Daylight players don't want to talk about it. Survivors OP.
Speaker 1:No, I can't sing, I'm not even going to fucking try, it's a mess. Yeah, palettes, I'm going to name my first child Palette, like, instead of Colette. Palette, it's a. I can use this time to take a drink and, like, do other stuff. You know, because we're all into the song, we're not even paying attention to the podcast anymore. Okay, all, look the song. We're not even paying attention to the podcast anymore. Okay, all, look the same.
Speaker 1:There is a mad update here, by the way. That's what we're here for right now is. There is a mad, fucking update. Yes, it's a mad update. So our update is actually the new PTB. We've got 8.7.0. It's going to be on the PTB. I don't know if they gave a date. This update, though, dropped on April 10th, so that was three days ago.
Speaker 1:Now I'll go through. I'm not going to go through everything in here, but I will kind of hit some of the high points. So this is part of their quality of life bullshit that they came up with, and I'm sorry to call it that, but that's just the first word that comes to mind. It's going to be survivor, main quality of life. That's just what it's going to be. It's not going to help the killers very much, but we'll go to. We're going to go through with an open mind.
Speaker 1:I haven't read everything. I did take the chance to like peruse. I just browse like I do whenever I go to the store. By the way, I spent way too much fucking money at the store. Yes, I had 10 minutes to go through my favorite clothing store before they closed and they had everything on sale and I went fucking berserk because I found stuff that just, oh my God, dude, the guy at the counter. It's funny.
Speaker 1:I'm sorry I have to go off topic. I know you guys are not happy with that. See, I'm doing it again. The guy at the counter was an interesting gentleman. He was very charismatic. I put these clothes up there and his first reaction was damn. And he was like he was into these clothes because he was like damn boy, you got swag. I was just laughing and he was like you're going to look like a gentleman, like a straight up certified gentleman. And I loved it because he reminded me of Hellfire Jackson, which is, you know, one of my favorite singers and the high priest of the toxic cult and also the antagonist of the upcoming rock opera, the Summoning of the Toxic Teacher, that tentative title to that song.
Speaker 1:So anyway, that's that I got spent too much on clothes. What was I going to talk about next? I can't even remember. Oh, the, the, uh, the DVD update. That's probably what you'll be saying by the end of this. So here we'll go through the update. Okay, so it says we haven't included the crunchy numbers. Now, I guarantee you why they didn't include the crunchy numbers is because they're going to change those fucking numbers Whenever they, whenever people complain about numbers, is because they're going to change those fucking numbers whenever they. Whenever people complain about the killer, they're going to change those numbers down because they don't want people to know how much they're nerfing killers. Now, does that make sense? It certainly makes sense for them because it's going to keep the killers quiet and survivors are gonna be happy as fuck. They probably won those numbers because they want to see how badly we're getting fucking there anyway. Okay, so go through the update.
Speaker 1:There is a new quest system. What so the quest system? What it looks like? It's going to replace the daily ritual tomes and event tomes. You know how you have to click in like 20 different fucking spots to find everything and you have to go. I got to make this thing active, I got to take this one and like, read this shit and then try to remember it during the match and stuff like that. It said right here on the quest they don't need to be considered active. So this is Fortnite. Essentially, at this point, you got all these quests as you're going through. It's going to fuck. Hey, you finished this, you did 10 of this, you got four of this, you caught five fish, you killed somebody with a shotgun, what the fuck ever Like. It's just okay. Milestone quests, which is like the, the big ones you know hook, unhook a hundred, unhook 200, unhook 300. So it says right here you also get quest notifications during the match, maybe. So that's, it's Fortnite. So if you are a Fortnite fan which, dak, I'm looking at you, one of our listeners, one of our longtime listeners, and he was like one of the first to like jump out and like follow and say, hey, a big listener of the podcast, appreciate you, dak. Once you get that microphone, we're gonna have a good interview anyway. So that's that it says right here.
Speaker 1:Our intention is that we want trials to feel even more rewarding, making in-game tasks and rewards easier to engage with. What this means for you is that you can complete multiple quests per trial. You can pin quests to easily reference them in game and rewards are unlocked automatically to minimizing. Okay, they grammar, please, anyway. So let's skip that.
Speaker 1:Archives, tome and rift changes. Extended the number of levels in the deep rift I'm fine with that. That's good. I'll give that a. I'll give that a. There we rift. I'm fine with that. That's good. I'll give that. Uh, I'll give that a. There we go. I'm cool with that.
Speaker 1:Updated the rift here following deep rift is a replaceable source of blood points. Okay, that's fine. All tome in the compendium is unlocked for all players. That's fine. I thought it was bullshit. A lot of of the Tome entries were locked behind the fucking stupidest challenges. No sense in that. So I'm on board. All right, now let me keep going.
Speaker 1:Perk, preview and lobby the people see their own perks. There's a little widget where you could see your own perks in the pregame lobby so you don't have to click on the perk page and they're saying for new players, it's, it's, uh, it's handy. I'm, I'm fine with that. I think that's cool. Hey, we're doing okay so far. The quest system Okay, it's, it's fine. The other two pretty good. So I'm fine with that. Uh, pre-equipped items and add-ons. Newly unlocked survivors become pre-equipped with a small set of add. Of course they do. And then newly unlocked killers also come with add-ons. That's fine, I don't, I don't give a shit. That's? Uh, what's a what's? Where's my thing for that? No, not that one. Uh, the other one, uh, what is it? Yeah, that one, okay, so that's that, I would give a shit.
Speaker 1:Unhook spam prevention each survivor can attempt to unhook another survivor three times on the next attempt. They cannot cancel each survivor's individual hook attempt. Count resets when the hook survivor exits a hook state. So apparently survivors were spamming each other Like they were. They were getting toxic together, which I thought it was always, you know, directed toward the killer, but apparently they're doing it to each other, so by, like, pretending to unhook over and over again. So they are putting a stop to that. Uh, let me see, where is that? Yeah, fine, a stop to that, let me see when is that? Yeah, fine.
Speaker 1:Improved safety checks, or improved skill check safety net Apparently sorry, shut the fuck up. So they're giving a wider range. You know how, whenever you're like repairing a gen and the skill check goes off like right before you let go and it does that whole thing there. They're putting a little buffer in there that way that doesn't happen. Of course survivors are gonna get that. It's garbage.
Speaker 1:Um, let me see then. We got changed to the hound master that they're slowing down snug whenever he vaults. Of course that's gonna be. You know, it's too good. It's too good. Um, haste and hindered stacking is no longer a thing. Hex pentimento has been nerfed into the fucking ground. Of course it has, because it was good.
Speaker 1:So that's that, and that's pretty much 8.7.0. That's not a lot. And they're saying that this quality of life is going to be this big thing. These are not like big things. That the, the, the tome and the quests Okay, like that's okay. But is that a whole developer update, like if that's all we're getting in these bigger patches, like that's it's, it's not a lot. Is that supposed to be concerning? Concerning? Is it always going to be that way? I don't know. Um, also, next point, if we're going to the next thing. So that was 8.7.0. The next thing is there's a new survivor, steady fucking something.
Speaker 1:You could go on twitter and listen to the talking, like talking on the phone or something like that. I don't even fucking know. I don't care. They're all trying to guess who this person is. But whatever, I don't get it. Let me see if I could probably find the sound if I cared enough. I didn't keep it. I didn't keep it. Why can't I not? I just say um over and over, because I'm thinking of the word. You know, I think like a thousand fucking miles an hour, but then I don't have the words to get what I'm thinking out to you people, you idiots, and so I. I started like that and that's what happens. Where is it the steady state, or something like that? I think what is it called? Steady, fucking something? Cool hand Luke or something, something I don't know where. Oh, there it is.
Speaker 1:There it is I am dead tired hang on, I don't think you can hear it. I'm gonna have to. I'm gonna have to pump up the jam here. Pump up the jam, hang on. Here we were. The jam is currently being pumped I am dead tired are you?
Speaker 5:make matters worse my eyes yeah so bloodshot you sound? Nothing comforts a patient like scary ass, red eyes staring down at him okay I need more sleep okay screams in the dark is having this big event oh, is there a tone related?
Speaker 1:no rest for the wicked as it goes wait that was a am I am I doing too much? Probably you are. Yes, you're talking too much. Oh, there's music, steady pulse, coming fucking, may 6 to uh. Fucking game near you, a survivor with overpowered perks. Shut the fuck up, whoever you are. Okay, that's that. That's a new survivor.
Speaker 1:I don't know who that is, I don't care. I haven't even read comments, because it's going to be something they're going to give her. Apparently, she might be transgendered. I don't get. Who the fuck cares about that? Just give. Okay, it doesn't matter what she's got and what she identifies, as. I don't know why people even get upset about that. How dare they fucking have a like okay.
Speaker 1:Anyway, that's a totally separate point that we won't go into in the anniversary episode 50. That will be for later, okay, anyway, I didn't want that to go off topic and you know how I do. So I'm not going to do that. I will. I refuse to do that. We're refusing. I am in a state of refusal to go into why that doesn't matter and why it couldn't matter less.
Speaker 1:Okay, so we've got the 8.7.0 just came out, but you know that we have to get somebody else's opinion, and I think you know who that person is None other than Nikki AI Dente, our good friend Nikki, thank you for coming by. I'm going to give you a little round of applause there. Okay, nikki, for better or worse, I don't know, he went into unhinged lunatic mode whenever he saw, oh God, the last word. I just saw the last word of what he said, and the last word is bitch. So I um. Good luck everybody. This could, this could be bad, hang on. I'm copying and pasting in the notes and I said what do you think about this? Tell me your thoughts on 8.7.
Speaker 3:Hey, though jesus hearing this shit yeah 8.70 tB is dropping in hotter than Uncle Naki's ankles in a sauna. Okay. And I'm sweating through my tracksuit. Just reading this goddamn dev update, you sound like you're in a fucking Nikki shut the fuck up.
Speaker 1:I can't hear you because you sound like you're in a fucking tunnel for some reason. Hang on, let me, let me get Nikki back here. This is, uh, what is wrong with him today. He is, he's kind of losing it a little bit. Hang on, let me, let me see. If I do this, I'm going to, I'm going to get him kind of behaving better. Uh, that's not it, that's not it.
Speaker 1:Oh no, you almost heard that was the other one. Oh no, you almost heard that was the other one. Oh shit, I almost fucked it up. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Okay, let's see, there we go and we've got here like that and I think that's better. I think that's better. Shut the fuck up for a second. We're having technical issues on Camping Room Next week on Camping Room Softly. We experience technical issues, as we do every single fucking week, and episode 50 is absolutely no different.
Speaker 3:You hearing this shit? Here he is, 8.70 PTBs dropping in, hotter than Uncle Naki's ankles in a sauna.
Speaker 1:Okay, and.
Speaker 3:I'm sweating through my tracksuit just reading this goddamn dev update. Why First? Of all the quest system. What in the actual anti-Italian fuck is this?
Speaker 1:What is it, oh Jesus? Oh sure he's. He's. Where's the devil? I can't with this. How long is he gonna?
Speaker 3:Took him out back, put two in the spaghetti and called it progress. No, no, no. Now we got quests. Sounds like some medieval British RPG bullshit, like Earl Grey's trying to turn DBD into Elden fucking Ring Cheebagged edition. So now you got your dailies, your rift shit and your event tasks all mashed together in one sloppy antipasto of grind and you don't even gotta click anything to activate them.
Speaker 1:No more is that bad?
Speaker 3:you just automatically get rewarded yeah, playing is that bad brother, bro? What brother? This isn't a game anymore what is it? It's a goddamn participation trophy parade. I remember when you had to bleed for those blood points you did, yes, I remember when you had to tunnel for those blood points? You did yes, remember when you had to tunnel for your rituals.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that was, this is some kindergarten cooking class bullshit. He's not wrong. He is not fucking wrong. You are. Yes, that will get that. I mean he's not wrong. They're making it easier and easier. Maybe they're trying to appeal, hey, because of Five Nights at Freddy's is coming out. They're easier.
Speaker 3:maybe they're trying to appeal, hey because of five nights at freddy's is coming out. They're trying to appeal to children now with this murderous game and the killers on the fucking rampage.
Speaker 3:And what's this milestone quest nonsense? You reward me for hooking people repeatedly. Now are you? I've been doing that for eight years. Where's my back pay? Where's my ghost face pension? That's true. I built this system off of hooks and basement blood. Now suddenly that's new. Hey, that's right. And pinned quests. You mean I can stare at my quests while I'm playing instead of thinking about strategy. How is he so fucking?
Speaker 1:genius.
Speaker 3:Except for that, oh my God, he was sounding great yeah. What the fuck is happening, yeah.
Speaker 1:Not me, you can apparently, they do, they do, they did.
Speaker 3:Okay.
Speaker 1:Oh God.
Speaker 3:Jesus Christ, he's losing it, man 2019. Jesus Christ, now they're giving it away like free breadsticks at Olive Garden and what's this pre-equipped perk bullshit?
Speaker 1:He's losing it, man.
Speaker 3:So newbies get free perks on their first slot now.
Speaker 1:Apparently they do yes.
Speaker 3:Just hand out dead hard, like it's Halloween candy.
Speaker 1:Oh Jesus, how about we just?
Speaker 3:spawn them with Off the Record and Three Hook States while we're at it. That's true, this is baby mode.
Speaker 3:Deluxe. We just spawned them with Off the Record and Three Hook States. While we're at it, that's true, this is Baby Mode Deluxe. Oh, hang on, I got the sound. This is the sippy cup edition of DBD. Sippy cup edition Unhook, spam prevention. You mean to tell me I only get to fake and unhook three times before I'm forced to commit? This is fascism. This is a war on chaos. I fake unhooks like I fake family loyalty, constantly and without consequence. They added a grace period to skill checks now yeah, they did, you don't blow it just because you got off a gen a second too late.
Speaker 3:Oh so now we're coddling players who don't respect timing.
Speaker 1:That's true. What's?
Speaker 3:next Skill check Auto aim. A fucking aim bot for pallet stuns. He's not wrong when does the madness end? It doesn't Talk, houndmaster. Okay, houndmaster, slow down the vault speed on Snug, you cowards. First you buff her blood points to make her look good, then you nerf her vault speed. This is like sprinkling parmesan on a fucking dog turd and you want to fix status effects stacking. You want to tell me I can't stack haste on haste. That's like telling me I can't put vodka and wine.
Speaker 3:This is why I say, council of secret British cooking school dropouts, because only them would fear speed. Pentimento got changed too. Now, instead of slowing gate opening and recovery speed, it stacks healing and repair penalties based on how many totems you rekindle, which I've been doing for years. I called this shit the Pentimento Piledriver Back in 2021.
Speaker 1:Oh no, not again. Nicky back in 2021? Oh no, not again nicky.
Speaker 3:Now they act like they invented it oh my god I'll sue them for emotional damage and recipe theft. Look, this patch ain't all bad, but it brings a polished corporate tea bag and it's got, earl grey stench all over it oh, jesus calculated it's sanitized, it's british and I'll be in the ptv.
Speaker 1:I'll be there all right, of course you will in the basement go space crouch knife glistening, yeah ready to hold a business meeting and if I lose?
Speaker 1:uh-huh mercury's in retrograde bitch okay, let's take nik AI fucking dente. Thank you for coming by. Let me give you another round of applause, sir. Yeah, that was good. That was unhinged, but it was good. Unhinged but it was good, all right. So that's the big news for this week the new Survivor and the new PTB. That's, that's it for all the big news. Now we got to talk about one other thing on episode 50.
Speaker 1:I had a match this morning that I wanted to talk to you about because I wanted to bring up what was happening. So let me let me give you the gist of what went on. There was a survivor in this one match that was running a combination of unusual perks, and I'm going to have to have the regular AI explain, explain the DBD perks. They were running Boon, exponential Okay, they were running Flip Flop. They were running Boone Exponential Okay, they were running Flip Flop, they were running Unbreakable. And then they were also running Exponential Flip Flop, unbreakable, and Boil Over Okay. So I need those descriptions at hand so I can kind of tell you what was going on. And it says actually, my GPT said that they would call this build don't you dare slug me, you absolute bastard build. That's actually really good, because that is what was going on. So remember, unbreakable is where you could pick yourself up once without any help and also increases your recovery speed. So that encourages killers to slug strategically. Now you've got boon exponential, which is a yoichi perk, where you create a boon totem and if you are within the range of that boon you will always be able to get up over and over and over. So you've got unbreakable, which gets you up quicker. You've got the boon totem, which if it's active, you just get up over and over again. The next perk was flip flop, where you recover more quickly, which is stacked with unbreakable and if you're slugged and you build up that recovery, you max out at half of your recovery bar turns into a wiggle bar if the killer picks you up. Do you see where this is fucking going? And then they got boil over, which makes hooks more difficult to see. It. Um, also makes you wiggle and bounce back and forth. The killer has a harder time walking. If they drop from a, then that wiggle bar goes up. So they've got three perks that make your recovery faster. They've got two that make your wiggle bar faster and then they have boil over. So if you drop from a height that makes it even more quick, fast, whatever.
Speaker 1:So which map do we go to? We go to Haw hawkins lab, which is normally a pretty good map for the killer right, but this survivor kept going upstairs to that little part. Do you know where the the hole to the upside down was, which is kind of like on the end of the hawkins map? There's a ramp that goes up and around to that where you're on top of the glass and there are two holes where you could drop down and there was a gen there. This survivor kept going there because they knew one thing would happen. I couldn't take them down the ramp because that would be too far and they'd be able to get off. I couldn't take them down the windows because the wiggle bar would spike. They were purposely there just to be able to wiggle off of me.
Speaker 1:Now I slugged them. They got right up because a boon exponent. There was a boon somewhere, I don't, I'm not exactly sure where. They kept doing it over and over again and luckily the other survivors were so shitty that I was able to get all of them out, except for this. There was one that I slugged.
Speaker 1:I slugged another player on the other side of the map. I knew this son of a bitch was there waiting to be slugged again. So guess what I did? Went over there and fucking slugged this shit out of them and they got up. So you hit them again, boom, go down, get up, hit them again, boom, go down, get up, hit them again, hit them, fucking again, slug them until they bleed, fucking out. And that's exactly what I did.
Speaker 1:And guess what?
Speaker 1:They came in them. They in the end game chat. They call me a fucking slugger. What in the hell is this crap? That's the biggest fun bunch of fucking bullshit I have ever heard.
Speaker 1:If you bring a build that even the AI can call, don't you dare slug me. You absolute bastard. I'm going to fucking slug you. You dumb son of a bitch like that. What else is there to fucking do? I don't get it. That just burned me Like that burned. That burned me. That survivor main energy right there. If you're gonna call me a slugger, I recorded the match too, so you can bet that shit's going on YouTube in every single fucking social media toxic teacher TTV. By the way, now there's somebody that we have not talked to in quite some time that I wanted to get their thoughts on this build and what it meant, and if it was okay for that person to refer to me as a slugger. And that person is none other than the tea tyrant himself, earl Grey. So let's listen. Let's see what this survivor made refined, fucking British ass. No, don't clap for him. I did the angry one. I accidentally hit the clap button. Okay, earl, go for it.
Speaker 6:You, son of a bitch, I can't hear him brew over this situation like a proper pot of darjeeling slow, deliberate and not the slapdash espresso fueled frenzy our spaghetti slinging counterparts might favor spaghetti slinging.
Speaker 1:What the?
Speaker 6:now, then the survivor in question, running boon exponential, boil over I hate this flip flop and unbreakable was clearly playing the anti-slug aristocrat build.
Speaker 1:Oh Jesus, A build of refined taste and gallant defiance.
Speaker 6:Oh yeah, A veritable symphony of second chances, if you will.
Speaker 1:A symphony of second chances. This is garbage.
Speaker 6:The sheer audacity of standing up on one's own terms, with not a trace of borrowed strength from teammates. Oh Jesus, positively Churchillian.
Speaker 1:A Churchillian this is. I don't know if I'm going to make it through this whole thing. If he's referring to this by Winston Churchill, fucking terms, okay, let's get through this as good as we can, as well as we can, as whatever the fuck as we can.
Speaker 6:And yet you slugged them out yes, I did one might even call that crude. If not, it's not, dare I say, uncultured uncultured.
Speaker 1:You, son of a fucking bitch that it's. That is more culture in my fucking pinky than this guy's got in this whole fucking country, if you ask me yes, they called you a slugger and he um he doesn't say rightfully so.
Speaker 6:That's not just a nickname, old sport, that's a lifestyle choice it is a lifestyle choice.
Speaker 1:Welcome to the fucking slug fest. That's in one of the songs that I made. Welcome to the slug fest.
Speaker 6:Hella, fucking luia one devoid of nuance or flair. I've got an opportunity to engage in the refined game of wits and willpower. What? And you chose instead to sledgehammer your way through it like a football hooligan on holiday in Ibiza, that's the whole fucking point of this game.
Speaker 1:How does-? Why would you even do it any other way? Sledgehammer your way through the fucking game like a football hooligan on holiday in Ibiza. What the fuck is this? These are the worst fucking analogies I've ever heard.
Speaker 6:Sledgehammer your way through it like a football hooligan on holiday in Ibiza Slugging a bill designed to counter slugging. Yes, that's like inviting me over for tea and serving me lukewarm water with Lipton.
Speaker 1:Okay, Lipton is not bad. First of all, let's get one thing straight I'm from Oklahoma. I like Lipton straight.
Speaker 6:I'm from oklahoma. I like lipton. Okay, keep going. This is awful an abomination your face could have outplayed them through hooks, pressure and grace, but instead you chose blunt force of course, I fucking chose the italian way I'm not even italian lesson when, faced with the majesty of a survivor invoking unbreakable and boon exponential, you are not facing a mere downed foe.
Speaker 2:Oh Jesus, fucking Christ, you are confronting the spirit of resilience.
Speaker 1:It's not resilience and, frankly, you lost.
Speaker 6:The class war old.
Speaker 1:John, there is no class war. This aristocrat, fucking bullshit. Down with the aristocracy and eat the rich. That's what I fucking say. Why are we even doing tariffs? It's fucking bullshit.
Speaker 6:Now. Would you like a scone while we review some better options? Or are you planning to tunnel a kate with a tea cozy next?
Speaker 1:I will tunnel a kate every single time, but if there's, if there is tunneling, we should go through. We should rank Survivors by how much they deserve to be tunneled, based on their lore. I think that's a great idea and I'm going to make that happen. I need to put that on my fucking keep. I'll put it on there. I'll put it on there. But that was that was our fucking uh. Oh, it didn't even play. Okay, that was our British terrible. Fucking. Take it. I don't even have a sound for it. I need a take. Here we go. I don't even have a sound for it. I need a take. Here we go. You're not done with that. We got two words for you. There we go. I got something for him. There we go. Ellen Nikki, what do you fucking think about this?
Speaker 2:Say what you want, because I really don't give a damn. Nikki go.
Speaker 3:Ah, bah, bah oh what Did this powdered wig wearing Churchill, quoting post scone, snorting porcelain, blooded prick, just tell you?
Speaker 3:you, my co-host, my killer in crime, my fellow SABAM soldier in the slaughter trenches that you lost the class war because you slugged a build specifically designed to counter slugging. Yes, he did, Nicky. Get you out of your mind, Earl. You insufferable monocle polishing Brexit, breathing inbred tea bag Whoa shit, Listen up you. Pale tea drenched tofu muffin. This was never about class. Oh my God, this was war. This is bad. You got survivors out here like goddamn necromancers trying to cast themselves out of death like it's a fucking Dungeons and Dragons campaign. And I'm supposed to give them a gentleman's trial? No, I can't. I gave them pasta justice. I know, that's what I did?
Speaker 3:I gave them marinara retribution. Yeah, that's what I did. I gave them the slug of destiny. You pompous scone, goblin Slug of destiny, anti-slug aristocrat build, yeah, yeah, and I'm running the full body. Buddha brutality, bill, killer instinct, marinated in pure disrespect, served with a garnish of shut the fuck up on a bed of. Why are you on the ground then? Huh, you want to know what's uncultured, earl, your what? That wet cardboard you call a perk loadout Boon, exponential, more like spoon, expendable. What Boil over? I boil over just hearing your voice. Oh, jesus Christ, flip-flop. Yeah, I wore flip-flops to your funeral. Unbreakable. The only thing unbreakable is my record of not giving a single fuck about Jesus Christ. He's on fire. I tunneled that Kate with a tea cozy on her head and I'd do it again why, you know why why, cause.
Speaker 3:This ain't a tea party yeah this is little Italy bitch. I serve kneecaps and noodles, not second second chances, I agree. You keep sitting there with your pinky up and your head up your ass while I camp the basement like rent's overdue and make content so good. Even the entity subscribes. Oh my God.
Speaker 3:Go polish your teacup and cry about your MMR on a doily, you aristocratic prune, and tell Patricia if she sends me one more goddamn crumpet emoji. I'm declaring a full mob war on the entire tea time. Terror squad oh slug. Life for life, slug life for life.
Speaker 1:There we go. Oh, jesus christ, I will take slug life for life, bitch. That is that one match has spawned this whole fucking mess here. So that's, if you run a build like that, you are going to get slugged. I'm sorry to say. You deserve every single fucking second of it. I come, come at me If you disagree with that. Why would you run that build and say don't slug me, that's, that's not right to do. That's fucking. You're just, I can't. I can't with that, because you deserve every single fucking second of it and I'm going to have a heart attack if I keep talking about this. So I've got to stop, and you know what we have to do because I have to stop is we have to go to our second to last topic of the day. I need to make a new one, shouldn't I? With all the new places that we've done, grab your hat, y'all. I think I've got the other one actually Give me that Irish brawm Muskogee.
Speaker 1:Oklahoma. See, I'm pulling up everything here. All right, so we are. Oh, yeah, Sorry, I don't know where the fuck are the viewers from. Okay, anyway, we are. Where the fuck are the viewers from? We are there and we've got to pick a town. Yes, thank you, let me see, I've got a special town this week.
Speaker 1:I actually picked it out because we had somebody on YouTube leave a nice comment, very nice comment, talking about how they're a longtime listener of the show, they enjoy the content. And I said, hey, where are you from? I'm going to mention your place on the podcast. And they said, hey, guess what? I am from fucking Harrisburg, illinois, indiana, illinois. Where is it? Oh shit, I'm hearing the wrong fucking about Indiana, illinois. Was it Indiana or Illinois? It was Illinois, illinois, yes, very good, illinois.
Speaker 1:So let's take a look at none other than Harrisburg, illinois. I don't even know what's in Harrisburg. I've never fucking. My keyboard just died. Are you fucking serious? I can't even type right now, of course, why toxic? Wouldn't you plug in your keyboard and make sure you're ready before we have a fucking podcast?
Speaker 1:I don't know person whose voice I just made up. That sounds exactly like my voice, but slightly different because it's more passive, aggressive. Okay, there's my keyboard. What was I doing? Oh, yes, harrisburg Illinois, let me, I'm going to look up Harrisburg Illinois, harrisburg Illinois, and what I'm going to do is I'm going to find their homepage here, the city of Harrisburg, illinois.
Speaker 1:From the garden of the gods to some of our favorite shops, harris is oh, it's a gateway to the Shawnee national forest. They have a Sasquatch festival in Shawnee or in fucking Harrisburg Illinois. Where is my sound for that? Where is my? What in the hell is this crap? That is exactly right. Okay, so we're going to look up Sasquatch Festival after this. From the Garden of the Gods to some of our favorite shops, harrisburg is home to a unique array of things to do, while being the center of southeastern Illinois. I don't know why you would even take pride in being in southeastern Illinois, much less the center of southeastern illinois. I don't know why you would even take pride in being in southeastern illinois, much less the center of it. We welcome you and hope that you may join us in our vision for the future of our community. As city leadership, employers and residents work hard every day to ensure they actually misspelledure on their government fucking website. Ensure a brighter future for this place we call home. They have a video. Are you serious? They have a dramatic video.
Speaker 5:Surrounded by abundant farmlands.
Speaker 1:Are you fucking kidding?
Speaker 5:Nestled deep in the hills of Southern Illinois. Oh, no One of the state's mostled deep in the hills of Southern Illinois. Oh no, one of the state's most photographed locations.
Speaker 1:No, it's not.
Speaker 5:It can't be Home to the Garden of the.
Speaker 1:Gods? What is the Garden of the Gods, shawnee?
Speaker 5:National Forest Okay.
Speaker 1:A forest, it's trees, the.
Speaker 5:Garden of the Gods is a geological wonder.
Speaker 1:It's a fucking rock. I'm not awestruck. Sculpted by the hands of time, to explore ancient sculpted by fucking water breathtaking.
Speaker 5:This does at every turn, it's not breathtaking, Whether you're an avid trekker. I'm not just seeking a serene stroll. I'm not this enchanted forest.
Speaker 1:It's not a change in journey you won't soon forget.
Speaker 5:I'll forget it. It's not enchanted. I'll forget it.
Speaker 1:Oh, it's not. They have more. Oh my god, they have the dorkiest looking fucking hiker with those two walking sticks. Now they got fucking kids and shoes. Oh, is that.
Speaker 5:Was I laughing from that? Kids and shoes has to offer?
Speaker 1:oh, there is that through lush forest was a laughing.
Speaker 5:Oh, there's the glen o jones lake area in mountain township, nature as it unfolds around you I, I can't.
Speaker 1:Sasquatch festival on october 4th. Do you believe that? Oh my god, they have a fucking run like a sasquatch. What is this sasquatch? Registered by august 15th to get a swag bag and a t-shirt. The race will start in the harrisburg courtyard. They are having a 5k where people dress up as sasquatch oh, good lord, oh. And they're gonna have an expert, fucking expert, fucking round table discussion with two people from the Squatchers and they discuss their experience with Sasquatch. What is their experience? What kind of fucking experience do you have?
Speaker 1:I did not plan this ahead of time. By the way, this was not supposed to be episode 50, talking about fucking Sasquatch and bringing Earl Grey. This is all happening out of fucking nowhere. October, they have a Sasquatch calling contest where you get a hundred dollars if you fucking win. Why is this a fucking thing? What is going on here? What is happening in Harrisburg that they can have such a? They have a car show, sasquatch sighting interviews oh my God, they have the interviews on here. We can listen to people talking about when they saw Sasquatch. Okay, are you ready? Are you fucking ready for this? Are you ready? Get ready, because you have to hear this. Are you ready? I'm ready. I don't know if you're ready, though I'm pressing. Play for better or worse. Are you serious? So I remember it like it was yesterday.
Speaker 1:Oh Jesus Christ, why does he have a shotgun?
Speaker 4:It was late August. I was out in the yard, okay. Working on the burn pile throwing some stuff in there.
Speaker 1:Oh Jesus.
Speaker 4:I was getting ready to light it and I heard something and smelled something at the same time oh, you probably farted when I turned I thought maybe it was a coyote or something like oh no, they don't make coyotes like a glimpse of something big behind the bushes okay so I ran, I got my shotgun.
Speaker 1:Did you by? The time I. You're going to kill it. I went in the chamber and raised the gun. Who did you vote for? And I froze. Yeah. And this thing was huge. No it wasn't. I can still smell the stench. Stench of what it was probably some random dude. Maybe it was your wife by the time I did it it had gone through the wood.
Speaker 4:I believe there's something out there there's nothing out there I don't know what you want to call it I'll call it nothing it's no, it's not, no, no skunk ape, is that a? Thing, no, you didn't, and I never believed until I seen it.
Speaker 1:Yeah well, you didn't see anything. Who are these people, and why did they all look like they fucking voted for the same person? Here's another person that saw this fucking thing.
Speaker 7:Oh God, they haven't seen Well this was something that happened to me around 1980 when my band Filthy McNasty was playing Filthy.
Speaker 1:McNasty is his band and it's filled like P-H-I-L. I can't make this fucking shit up. This is for real. I have never heard of this shit in my life. Yeah, hell yeah. Filthy McNasty and his name is fucking Phil. He is the Phil. I can't, I can't. This is episode fucking 50, and this is the most unhinged Phil.
Speaker 7:At the end of the night I was loading my equipment in the parking lot and it was one of those evenings, probably around I felt like it.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 7:About September Okay.
Speaker 1:I felt like it was September. It feels kind of September outside today.
Speaker 7:And I was finishing putting all my equipment in my van.
Speaker 1:All of his filthy McNasty signs.
Speaker 7:And the parking lot was empty.
Speaker 1:Of course. Of course it was empty. Nobody's going to see Filthy McNasty.
Speaker 7:I stopped because a movement caught my eye. I looked out there.
Speaker 1:The movement of what People running.
Speaker 7:I saw a big dark figure, a big, dark figure.
Speaker 1:Oh my God, is he racist.
Speaker 7:Seven feet tall. Oh my God.
Speaker 1:Okay, he's a racist, it kind of took my breath away.
Speaker 7:I was shocked.
Speaker 1:I'm sorry, I can't, I can't.
Speaker 7:I stood and stared and it stared at me. I don't know what it was. It was, I know, I believe. Do you.
Speaker 1:No, I don't. That's the entire thing. I don't believe in this garbage and I feel bad for the lead singer, slash guitar, slash kazoo player, filthy fucking McNasty, who does believe in this stuff. I looked up Filthy McNasty on YouTube and I, uh, there's a Filthy McNasty, but it's not this. This is them. This is them. I found Filthy. Filthy McNasty, but it's not this. This is them. This is them. I found Filthy.
Speaker 1:This sounds exactly what Filthy McNasty should sound like. This is it. This is from 1970, fucking four. Is this AI generated? Okay, it's, it's drug. They're on drugs. Obviously, they're going to see fucking Sasquatch. Okay, that's, that's enough. That is enough fucking of that. Okay, that, okay, that Sasquatch. You want to go on their fucking page and learn all about this Sasquatch Festival and all of that. But go ahead, be my guest and we've got one person that we need to talk to. I don't think he knows anything about Sasquatch or mentioned Sasquatch, so I apologize for that, but we've got to bring back everybody's least favorite guest to talk about harrisburg. Where'd the rest of the fucking sound go? Let's do it. I don't know about ah, harrisburg, illinois.
Speaker 3:Yeah, the meatball at the bottom of america's marinara jar. You wouldn't think anything ever happened there besides roadkill and old men arguing about corn yields.
Speaker 1:Well, apparently there's Sasquatch sightings, so I'm going to have to. You know, we'll have to ask Nikki about the Sasquatch sightings. You can't not do it, but we're going to listen. I didn't hear this story, so I don't know if Sasquatch is in it, but we're going to fucking find out.
Speaker 3:But let me tell you, kid, that town holds one of the darkest secrets in S-A-B-A-M history.
Speaker 1:Sasquatch.
Speaker 3:But before I'll lay out the legendary Harrisburg incident, Please mention Sasquatch.
Speaker 1:Let's set the table proper. Okay, capisce.
Speaker 3:Yeah, let's do it.
Speaker 1:Oh, it's small.
Speaker 3:It sounds like a family reunion. It used to be called that, which is what they say when a town don't got shit but trees and regrets. They got this place called the Garden of the Gods.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I know.
Speaker 3:It's a rock formation. Yeah, that's what I said, but it's so majestic it almost makes you forget the gas station. Food gave you violent, explosive flashbacks to. Uncle Naki's experimental cannoli lasagna. Also nearby is the ghost town of Muddy Illinois, Supposedly haunted. I used it once to dump some of my less cooperative business partners.
Speaker 1:Of course you did.
Speaker 3:Great acoustics and now.
Speaker 1:Okay.
Speaker 3:The story I've never told.
Speaker 1:Oh no.
Speaker 3:The pasta vault incident of harrisburg pasta vault incident was 2018 yeah I was running a pasta based digital currency scam with bruno, the basement bolognese, of course he has a crit.
Speaker 1:Of course, nikki has a cryptocurrency. If that hot to a girl has that, he's gonna have it right. Oh okay, not, okay, not again. This is chaos, guys, this is camping them softly. This is what you've come to expect, and if you're what?
Speaker 3:For a bunch of Midwesterners, including a few gullible folks from Harrisburg, that we were opening a vault beneath the Shawnee Forest filled with carbon era credits. We had blueprints, fake testimonials. We even convinced someone from the city council to endorse it after we catered their daughter's quinceañera with knockoff gnocchi. Okay, when did?
Speaker 1:he get this italian accent. He's never had that. He's always been from brooklyn or something. Little italy okay. So so they got this cryptocurrency going. They convinced somebody from the city council to endorse this. They catered their daughter's quinceañera with fake pasta.
Speaker 3:We called it the PASTA fund, protecting al dente savings through automation.
Speaker 1:Oh Jesus.
Speaker 3:And then the tea tyrant struck.
Speaker 1:Oh fuck, dude, this is it. Of course Earl Grey shows up Dude, this is it that of course earl gray shows up, dude. Um, this is like a tv fucking.
Speaker 3:I should make a cartoon of this fucking earl the monocle menace, gray caught wind of the whole operation and rolled up with his entire tea time terror squad holding a pop-up, proper british ethics hearing in the middle of Harrisburg City Park.
Speaker 1:These are dead by daylight players. What the fuck is happening? This was supposed to be. Whenever I programmed these AIs, they were simply supposed to feud in DBD and now they're fighting in parks. They're in what was it fucking Kazani Greece getting in a fist fight in a yogurt shop, and then they were trampling through fucking South Carolina, stealing arcade machines.
Speaker 3:Proper pipping, patricia bought an actual gavel. That's Patricia Biscuit. Barry handed out crumpets with cease and desist letters folded inside.
Speaker 1:Oh.
Speaker 3:Jesus English breakfast. Eddie played God Save the Queen on a fucking tea kettle whistle. We clashed right there on the walking trail, did you? Oh no, he had a sword. What are they doing so?
Speaker 1:they came and had a court fucking thing for Nikki and then they lied about a cave being in the ground that they were going to mint this digital fucking whatever. And then bruno hit one of his compatriots, uncovers an actual bunker or vault or something boom, we used it to claim the vault was always there jesus turned it into a fake museum a fake made fourteen thousand dollars in spaghetti coin.
Speaker 3:Before the jig was spaghetti. Then the sheriff's wife slipped on a rogue meatball and sued us. Case was dismissed due to cultural misunderstanding. Bye, harrisburg. What it was, never the same. Because of the fucking rogue meatball. Harrisburg, tell your listener we remember.
Speaker 1:Okay, respect them. I'll tell them, honor them, yeah.
Speaker 3:And we sincerely apologize if they lost any crypto pasta in the incident.
Speaker 1:Oh, my God.
Speaker 3:Welcome to the legend. Kid S-A-B-A-M sees you.
Speaker 1:That was Nikki in fucking Harrisburg, fucking Illinois. Thank you, nikki. Oh wait, no, I didn't ask him about the Sasquatch Festival. They have a Sasquatch Festival and we just watched the sightings. I need to. Hey, nikki, shut the fuck up. Hey, they have a Sasquatch Festival there and there are testimonials from testimonials from hillbillies who say they've seen Sasquatch. Number one were you, did you see Sasquatch? Hang on. Number one, no, number one. Have you been to the festival? Oh my God, this is going on a lot longer than I thought it would. Have you been to the festival? And number two have you seen Sasquatch? Oh no, oh god, what's happening? This is going so far off the rails. That's so far off the rails. I need to hurry. Have I been to the harrisburg sasquatch festival? Oh no, of course he's been there and of course he made a fake name. Okay, hang on. Oh no. And he answered the question on if he has seen sasquatch.
Speaker 1:I'm sorry this story is still ongoing. I just gotta play the music while we wait. How long is this fucking story gonna be? Harrisburg, you're getting a mouthful here. He's still going. He's talking about 1958. A bag of chips enters the scene. This is too long to paste Jesus. Okay, hang on, I apologize, this is nuts. This is fucking nuts and this is camping them fucking softly, where we talk about dead by daylight for five minutes and then random bullshit for the other 40. And this is what you come for, or something. This is all okay, let's generate, let's do it. This is I don't know.
Speaker 3:Apparently they say this is the only have I been to the harrisburg sasquatch festival have you you bet your fucking hairy back. I have no, not just once. I've been three times. Why? All under All, under different aliases, of course, because the locals caught on that I was running a cryptid cannoli stand. That didn't exactly pass.
Speaker 1:A cryptid cannoli stand.
Speaker 3:First time. I went. I was under the name Antonio Big Futino. I can't. Big Futino Wore a gorilla suit and claimed to be the world's first Italo Squatch. Instead, I roamed.
Speaker 1:Italo Squatch. I can't. Where did he come up with this? I programmed the AI to be a Dead by Daylight, fucking player.
Speaker 3:The Appalachian Trail, looking for Maranara Springs, maranara.
Speaker 1:Springs. Apparently, in Harrisburg there are springs where Maranara shoots out of the ground. Okay, I accidentally clicked rewind. I apologize.
Speaker 3:Springs. I made $300 in tips and got chased out of town by a man wielding a rake and shouting. They took my sausage links. Second time I tried blending in, showed up with a camo hat.
Speaker 1:Of course.
Speaker 3:A jug of moonshine I borrowed from Don Vincenzo's garage. You sound like you're in there, and started interviewing people for a fake docuseries called Sasquatch the Forget About it Five.
Speaker 1:Why do you sound that way, Nikki?
Speaker 3:One guy swore up and down. He saw Bigfoot Cross Route 34 carrying a Wendy's bag.
Speaker 1:It was probably one of those guys on the fucking website.
Speaker 3:Said it smelled like chicken nuggets and shame.
Speaker 1:Of course. Now, as for whether I, of course His own, yeah, have you, oh my God, of course, yes, we know, oh my. God, oh, my God Black.
Speaker 3:Market Moon Pies. I was deep in the woods, what's up?
Speaker 1:Oh no, what's up.
Speaker 3:Wyse. This massive figure stepped out of the fog.
Speaker 1:Oh, of course he did.
Speaker 3:Seven foot tall, covered in hair.
Speaker 1:Of course, he's always seven foot tall. He's a basketball player. There is some random ass hairy basketball player wandering around Harrisburg, illinois, and so they develop a fucking festival to this hairy, fucking basketball player.
Speaker 3:Felt like wet moss and expired Chianti.
Speaker 1:Okay.
Speaker 3:At first I thought it was Big ZD after a night out. Oh my God, this guy had trauma, the kind you only get from being on the run since 1958.
Speaker 1:Why would fucking Sasquatch?
Speaker 6:Okay.
Speaker 1:Sasquatch has been on the run since 1958. I don't know what happened in 1958 to send Sasquatch on the run and what the fuck is happening right now. Froggy and Joe, this will be your favorite episode ever, I swear he didn't speak.
Speaker 3:He just handed me a cassette tape and a bag of Funyuns. I don't know what was on that tape because my Walkman exploded shortly after, but ever since then, anytime I'm near Harrisburg, I feel watched Not by Earl.
Speaker 5:No, Not by um.
Speaker 3:B.
Speaker 6:B.
Speaker 1:Who B, who B Itch, I don't know, bitch, how long is he gonna do this?
Speaker 3:How long can? This go on by him Sasquatch.
Speaker 1:Okay. So he said he's being watched by fucking Sasquatch and gave him a cassette tape and a box of Funyuns. And the cassette tape caused his fucking Walkman to explode. At first I thought it was Big ZD after a night out. Oh wait, whoops, no. I accidentally, no, no. Oh wait, whoops, no. I accidentally, no, no.
Speaker 3:What Sasquatch? Yes, so yeah, I've been to the fest.
Speaker 1:And yeah, no, I've seen the squat?
Speaker 3:No, you haven't. You tell them good old boys in Harrisburg.
Speaker 1:No, he's not, he's real. No, he's not, he's hairy, oh God.
Speaker 3:And he knows when you're out of marinara.
Speaker 1:Of course he knows when you're out of fucking marinara. Nikki, you're a fucking liar. I may just call him a fucking liar. You're a fucking liar, you're yo, you're a fucking liar. That didn't happen, bitch. Okay, let's see. I don't know where this is gonna go. Oh no, okay. Okay, I made a mistake in. I'm sorry, I know I'm not talking. This has me out. Episode 50 has worn me the fuck out. I have never been this tired at the end of an episode of fucking camping them softly as I am right now. This is awful. All right, nikki, you're a fucking liar. Now we need to know how you feel about being called a liar. I'm tired, I'm exhausted. Now I am exhausted, egg, fucking exhausted. Let's go. Let's go, nikki. What's happening? Do it Speak, please. Why is it not generating? Are you serious? Why is it not generating? Nikki, fucking, talk to me. What's happening? What's happening here? It's not working. Oh, my God, I haven't lost my co-host. This is my whole show. This is what am I going to do without it? I can't do anything.
Speaker 3:Shit Yo, excuse the fuck out of me. You calling me Nikki Noodle Arms, a idente, a liar, the guy who once negotiated a peace treaty Between the Chupacabra and a group of Killer mains in the Red. Forest, the guy who taught Sasquatch how to moonwalk To avoid scratch marks. You think I made that up? Let me tell you something. You disrespectful ravioli Denying motherfucker, I've been chased out of more rural festivals Than you've had hot dinners. Shut the fuck up. I once sold authentic Sasquatch meatballs.
Speaker 1:Of course you sold them.
Speaker 3:A guy named Cletus tried to marry one. I saw Bigfoot eat a Waffle House whole plate and all, and you know what he tipped me in crypto. Bigfoot's got a fucking ledger. No, he doesn't. Don't come at me with that, you lying bitch Energy, unless you're ready for the full lasagna of truth. What the fuck you ever get stink-eyed by a man beast who smells like Axe, body spray and forest trauma? In college, yes, I have you ever made eye contact with a cryptid who reminded you of your nonna?
Speaker 1:That one of my ex-girlfriends.
Speaker 3:I fucking have.
Speaker 1:Of course you have so watch your tone, kid.
Speaker 3:You step to Nikki. You step into a forest full of disrespect, legends and linguine. Oh my god. And let me tell you ain't no hatch in the world, of course. Just consequences.
Speaker 1:Of course, of course, nikki, thank you for that last little bit. I'm exhausted. I've never been this tired before. Episode 50 fucking wore me the fuck out. This has been an awful experience. Episode 50 will go down in history as maybe the worst episode of any podcast in podcast history. But what I need to do before we leave, I need to give you guys a special gift that I've never given you before, and I'm going to leave it at that to episode 51 in season two, which will be episodes 51 through 100. But I'm going to leave you with this gift. Get the fuck out of my face.
Speaker 9:And for this one we're doing something a little meta maybe.
Speaker 8:We're turning the lens inward sort of Inward onto another podcast, specifically A phenomenon called camping them softly.
Speaker 9:That's the one now some listeners might know dead by daylight. The, the whore game, one killer for survivors, that whole setup.
Speaker 8:Right and camping them softly bills itself as a dead by daylight podcast, but it's got layers, definitely layers layers is a good word.
Speaker 9:Beneath the game talk, there's this Really strong current of opinion, especially aimed at survivor players. Oh yeah, intense opinions layers layers is a good word. Beneath the game talk, there's this really strong current of opinion, especially aimed at survivor players oh yeah, intense opinions.
Speaker 8:We've been digging through the transcripts and well, it's something else.
Speaker 9:It really is, which, you know, leads us to the big question for today why? Why do people listen to this? What's the actual draw? Because, let's be honest, some of it is pretty spirited spirited is a polite way to put it exactly.
Speaker 8:So that's our mission today. We're going to unpack, camping them softly. We'll look at the main guy, the toxic teacher. This whole Nicky AI Dante character.
Speaker 9:Dante Got to get the pronunciation right apparently.
Speaker 8:Right Dante and the whole Sabian lore that goes with him. It's wild.
Speaker 9:And the regular bits too right, like survivors saying stupid shit and the location check-ins.
Speaker 8:Oh yeah, the infamous. Where the fuck are the viewers from segment? We have to cover that.
Speaker 9:Okay, so let's start at the beginning. Then the toxic teacher, the persona driving this whole thing.
Speaker 8:Even the name gives you a clue. And that early theme song from episode 10.
Speaker 9:Oh yeah, I remember reading that he's the host of Hosts, the man with the most gonna make that money, goddamn.
Speaker 8:I mean talk about setting expectations. It's bold, Very bold.
Speaker 9:But it's interesting. You look at that same episode, episode 10, and there's actually some like real game analysis in there.
Speaker 8:Yeah, surprisingly detailed. He breaks down killer perks, oppression, overcharge, co-rophobia, merciless, storm, unnerving presence, huntress lullaby.
Speaker 9:Right and not just listing them. He gets into the weeds talking about the exact miss rate percentages for skill checks with those perks active.
Speaker 8:Exactly Like on top of the base 7% chance. It's almost, dare I say, analytical.
Speaker 9:Almost, but then you know even that early. The other side starts showing through Episode 11, he literally says what was it?
Speaker 8:Something like this isn't even much of a Dead by Daylight podcast. I should say it's Dead by Daylight and Mostly Stupid Shit podcast.
Speaker 9:Yeah, that was it so pretty self-aware actually.
Speaker 8:Very and already thinking about growth. Episode 12, he's giving out the social media handles. Toxic Teacher TTV the Toxic Teacher on YouTube.
Speaker 9:Asking for exposure.
Speaker 8:Yep Trying to build that audience for his quote mostly stupid shit podcast Makes you wonder who he thought would tune in.
Speaker 9:Which I guess leads us perfectly into the most unique part Nikki AI Dante, Remember dente.
Speaker 8:Nikki AI Dante, the AI co-host. This is where things get really elaborate.
Speaker 9:Yeah, elaborate is a good word. It's not just a gimmick. There's a whole story, but even early on the personality is there. Episode 25, you already hear the catchphrase.
Speaker 8:Get the fuck out of my face.
Speaker 9:That's the one Sets a tone, doesn't it A?
Speaker 8:very specific confrontational tone. How do you think that lands with listeners? Is it funny? Is it just aggressive?
Speaker 9:Probably depends on the listener right.
Speaker 8:Yeah.
Speaker 9:But then it goes beyond just catchphrases. We get Sabam.
Speaker 8:Ah yes, Sabam, the Societa Anonima Biscotti, Antimori Tied to Little Italy apparently.
Speaker 9:And their mission fighting disrespectful tea sipping. That's from episode 36. It's just where does this stuff come?
Speaker 8:from. It's just where does this stuff come from? It's incredibly detailed. We looked at this Saban Lore Archive document. It describes Nikki's setup RGB lights synced to the Italian flag, A monitor that always faces Little Italy.
Speaker 9:It's like world building for a podcast persona. And the usernames oh my god, the username.
Speaker 8:Right From Noodle Arms Original all the way to well, that incredibly long one.
Speaker 9:Your Mathasas Aspogchamps of Prima Donna of Little Italy, definitely not banned before. Actually, italian Trustman Broy, you can't make this stuff up.
Speaker 8:You really can't. And the narrative around it every ban was planned, every comeback, a resurrection.
Speaker 9:It's pure self-mythology. Do you think the listeners are like in on the joke, or do some people actually buy into this whole thing?
Speaker 8:That's the million dollar question, isn't it? The sheer effort involved suggests someone takes it seriously, even if it's just the creator. And it goes deeper.
Speaker 9:The Supreme Council.
Speaker 8:The Spaghetti Balls Supreme Council. Yes.
Speaker 9:According to the roster file, we saw characters like Big ZD, who's apparently terrified of flashlights, in the game and rage quits.
Speaker 8:Exactly the internal contradictions are just chef's kiss adds to the absurdity.
Speaker 9:And the incidents the tea tyrant showdown against someone named Earl Grey, it's like a bizarre online fanfic playing out.
Speaker 8:A 12-hour digital standoff over tea and pasta and the claim about controlling Italian DVD servers.
Speaker 9:On dial-up internet.
Speaker 8:On dial-up. The layers of impossibility are just staggering.
Speaker 9:It really is. And these recurring feuds, they seem central, the whole tea versus pasta thing.
Speaker 8:Oh, don't get him started on calling spaghetti noodles. Episode 42 apparently went deep on that.
Speaker 9:It's these really specific, almost petty grievances blown up into major conflicts. Do you think that's part of the appeal Like shared inside jokes based on extreme reactions?
Speaker 8:It could be. It's so specific and over the top it creates its own kind of internal logic, maybe Its own humor.
Speaker 9:Which fits with the segments too. Let's talk about Survivor saying stupid shit.
Speaker 8:Right. So the premise is he finds comments or forum posts from Survivor players.
Speaker 9:Comments he thinks are dumb or entitled.
Speaker 8:Precisely and then reads them out. But the delivery.
Speaker 9:Oh the delivery. Episode 28 was a classic example. Something like oh you freaking survivor mains, huh, yeah, yeah, I'm talking to you clowns who can't even loop a damn pallet without crying to the devs.
Speaker 8:For some bullshit buff, zero subtlety, pure confrontation.
Speaker 9:It's basically just railing against a segment of the player base. It seems designed to tap into that killer versus survivor friction that's, so you know, prevalent in Dead by Daylight.
Speaker 8:Definitely. Is it catharsis for killer mains listening, or is it just darkly funny to hear someone vent like that?
Speaker 9:Could be both. Maybe some listeners genuinely agree with the sentiment, find it validating. Others might just find the sheer negativity entertaining in a weird way, like watching a train wreck.
Speaker 8:Possibly. It's certainly not aiming for balance.
Speaker 9:Not at all.
Speaker 8:And then the other big one where the fuck are the viewers from the geographical rundown. This one feels a bit different. Sometimes he sounds genuinely curious, other times it's like performative exasperation.
Speaker 9:Yeah, you get these lists of places Early on it was like New Rochelle, dublin, sao Paulo, hounslow, kennewick, washington. Yeah, then later Berkshire.
Speaker 8:St Catharines, ontario, berlin, gelson-kirchen, palermo, flemish Braben, vancouver, avon, colorado. The list goes on. We saw that locations report too Yep, czechia, uruguay, Japan. It's genuinely global.
Speaker 9:A scattered global audience and it became such a fixture it got its own jingle.
Speaker 8:Oh God, the jingle, episode 23,. Toxic Teacher Camping them Softly. Where are the fucking viewers from? We're about to fucking find out. Are they from the United States or fucking Ireland? Are they from Sao Paulo or the fucking Australian island?
Speaker 9:It's certainly memorable, aggressively memorable. What's the appeal there? Just acknowledging the listener?
Speaker 8:I think partly, yeah, fostering that sense of like we're all in this weird thing together. But the aggressive, bewildered tone also feeds the overall toxic teacher persona. It's another performance element.
Speaker 9:Okay, so bringing it all together the toxic teacher persona, the Nicky AI, Dante Sobam saga, these confrontational segments Back to the main question why do people actually listen?
Speaker 8:Well, I think there are a few factors at play, especially within that specific gaming community. First, maybe the appeal is something totally unfiltered.
Speaker 9:Like raw and opinionated in a way. Most content isn't.
Speaker 8:Exactly In a community that can be pretty tribal, like Dead by Daylight's, having a voice that just goes all in on one side might feel authentic or at least validating to some people.
Speaker 9:Right If you share those frustrations with, say, survivor tactics. Hearing someone just unleash might feel good, cathartic, like you said.
Speaker 8:Definitely. Then there's just the sheer entertainment value of the chaos, the absurdity of say-bam the soundboard drops the running gags. It's unpredictable.
Speaker 9:It's almost like a performance piece. Sometimes you tune in wondering what crazy thing will happen next.
Speaker 8:And that ties into parasocial relationships right. Even with an abrasive personality, audiences can form connections. Remember that line from episode 21?
Speaker 9:The follow me blindly off a fucking cliff one. Yeah, that's intense.
Speaker 8:It is, but it shows the kind of connection he's fostering, intentionally or not. It creates a sense of belonging for the listeners who are in on it.
Speaker 9:A community built around shared anger maybe.
Speaker 8:Yeah.
Speaker 9:Or shared amusement at the anger.
Speaker 8:Could be, and maybe some listen ironically Like it's so over the top it becomes fascinating. They hate sermon as a form of dark comedy or transgressive fun Like a rubbernecking, a car crash, but for podcasts.
Speaker 9:Sort of, yeah, you just have to see what happens next, and it clearly works. For some people. The podcast has been going for a while. We saw mentions of it hitting episode 26 ages ago. It's obviously kept going. It found its niche.
Speaker 8:It really did. So this whole dive into camping them softly it really shows how varied online tastes are. Things that seem totally off-putting on the surface can find a dedicated audience.
Speaker 9:Yeah, it's kind of fascinating, which leaves us with a final thought, I guess, for everyone listening what does the fact that something like Camping them Softly exists and apparently thrives say? About you know online communities.
