Camping Them Softly: A Dead by Daylight Podcast

Ep. 54 - The DbD 2v8 Disaster, Choose Your Own Chapter Chaos, and a Dominican Dance-Off!

• ToxicTeacherTTV • Season 1 • Episode 54

Share episode

This week on Camping Them Softly, Dead by Daylight’s least favorite podcast goes absolutely nuclear on the return of DBD’s 2v8 mode. Toxic is stuck screaming into the void while survivors abandon gens faster than Nicky’s dignity vanished in the Dominican Republic.

Speaking of disasters—BHVR thinks letting players "Choose Your Own Chapter" is a good idea, which is like giving matches to arsonists and saying, "Surprise me." We break down exactly why this is gonna end in flashlight-clicking, bunny-eared madness.

And because this podcast is run by maniacs, Nicky A.I. Dente spills a frankly disturbing story involving busted Wii consoles, bootleg Just Dance duels against Earl Grey, laxative warfare, and hooking up with someone who might literally be the Dominican Entity. Aunt Cannelloni pops in briefly to roast your survivor fashion, and we debut our new outro music in a genre nobody asked for: Baroque Trench Funk. It’s exactly as cursed as it sounds.

If you enjoy chaotic Dead by Daylight rants, mocking survivors relentlessly, and personal dignity hitting rock bottom, congrats—you’re home.

🔪 Nicky’s Body Count – Episode 54

  • 1 digital exorcism of European downloads
  • 4 t-shirts acquired (1 hoarded by Toxic, 3 dangled as bait)
  • 1 Sabam vs TTTS exhibition match in a Santo Domingo bodega
  • 2 busted PS3s and 1 Wii with zero controllers
  • 1 Just Dance duel with Earl Grey to Pitbull’s "Fireball"
  • 1 sabotaged teabagging via Dominican laxatives
  • 1 pasta tattoo on Nicky’s ankle
  • 1 hookup with “the Dominican Entity” named Yormaira
  • 1 sacred USB stick hidden in Los Tres Ojos cave
  • 7 survivors doing jack shit on gens
  • 1 survivor crouching behind a tire at 90% gen
  • 1 AI co-host screaming in Italian and Welsh for two days straight
  • 0 fucking killer matches found
  • 1 genre invented: Baroque Trench Funk

Send Toxic a message! (Question? Comment? Concern? Survivor main and need rehab?)

Check me out everywhere!

https://linktr.ee/thetoxicteacher

Speaker 1:

What were we talking about before? We talked about schlongs. That's going to get me banned in Europe, I think. Let me mark that off getting banned in Europe.

Speaker 2:

Survivors get out of the way Toxic teachers camping them softly.

Speaker 1:

Hey everybody, check it out. It's me the toxic teacher. Here we are. This is it. This is episode 54. We're at Studio 54 right now and camping them softly. Everybody's least, least favorite. Shut the fuck up. I'm trying to talk.

Speaker 1:

I'm trying to talk here, I made it like 17 seconds without cursing. I think that might be a new record. Anyway, you're here on Camping them Softly, everybody's least favorite Dead by Daylight podcast. You may know me, at this point I'm the toxic teacher, everybody's least favorite podcast host and I think I get the most words in per minute of anyone. We talked about that last week, but guess what? We talk about the same thing every fucking week. That's the way we do things here on Camping them Softly. So, anyway, guys, we have a full episode.

Speaker 1:

I devoted a lot of time to this. Let's turn on some music, shall we? I think that might be too loud. There we go. It's like relaxing background music here. It's kind of like Stranger Things type background. That's what I'm going for here, anyway. Anyway, we've got some Dead by Daylight things to talk about. We've got some non-Dead by Daylight things to talk about, but I think for the most part you'll be pleased to know this is mostly a Dead by Daylight episode. Now, I know some people won't like that. Some people will be, I don't know. That sound wasn't very loud. I need louder fucking sound. There we go. That one was loud. Oh, sexy girlfriend, that one was okay, okay, anyway. Anyway, mostly Dead by Daylight this week.

Speaker 1:

Just wanted to let you guys know kind of off topic we are looking at a new logo, a new everything for Camping them Softly and my Twitch channel, toxic Teacher TTV. Check that out if you haven't already Also on YouTube Toxic Teacher TTV the Toxic Teacher. If you want to be on the podcast, shoot an email the toxic teacher at gmailcom and then on all the socials you'll find me toxic teacher ttv. So that is the shameless plug there. I need some new sounds. I I think I got a few and then we talked about that last week. I got some Nicky sounds here, if you guys don't know, anthony, anthony, oh, you remember that from last week.

Speaker 1:

Anthony, oh, rosalie, your aunt's on the phone, I don't even know. I need to get those louder. Those need to be louder and I think I can do that, because guess what we do on Camping them Softly? We test things out as the podcast goes on. That's just the. What you have to deal with here is me like troubleshooting my computer. This is this is computer repair at its finest. Let's see what this sounds like now. That's a lot better there, Anthony.

Speaker 1:

Anthony, I don't know what's happening right now.

Speaker 2:

Anyway, that's it.

Speaker 1:

So, guys, let's see, we're talking about the new logo. I've got my notes. I actually did notes this time. So we're talking about the new logo that should appear here in some time I don't know when, but it'll appear sooner or later. Also, the website is starting to form very, very slowly.

Speaker 1:

The toxic teachercom also. I did domain like what is it like? You know you do like the squatting or whatever, and then the redirect. So I also own camping them softlycom, which just goes, one goes to the other anyway. Um, those are the two big like non dead by daylight. Those are the me things. Okay, those are the me things.

Speaker 1:

Also working on that giveaway. I got some t-shirts to give away. That we will. I need to find some way to do that. I don't know what I'm gonna. Maybe if somebody leaves some kind of review or something and screenshots and sends it to me, boom, you get a t-shirt.

Speaker 1:

But we did get four t-shirts. You remember that last? What was that? Two weeks ago or two episodes ago, we got four t-shirts. I know, give it up for t-shirts. Am I right? Right, like we're all excited for t-shirts? The best kind of shirt that is the shape of a, of a letter. I don't know. I don't know what I'm doing here anyway. So we're gonna have to find a way out of those four shirts. I think I am keeping one of them and then the other three I will uh give away, because one of them was was a killer shirt that I would actually wear. Three of them, or two of them, were killer shirts. I was like, eh, like I would rather give those to you guys, and then one of them was a survivor shirt that I just no.

Speaker 1:

So anyway, we'll come up with that later, okay, so one other thing I want to talk about episode 53, something very odd happened with episode 53, by the way, guys, keep the comments coming in. I know you guys love the outro songs. Last week was militant chamber disco, which I did not even know was a genre of music. Apparently, chamber disco is a genre, a real one, which I had no idea, but militant chamber disco, I guess, is a more militant style, and Dak said he looked that up. He found like left-wing terrorist websites. So I wasn't trying that, but that's the result.

Speaker 1:

So, anyway, no, what I wanted to talk about is, if you go back and listen to it, the first line of it. I'm not going to repeat because here's why. And then also the first line of the podcast last week. I'm not gonna repeat either of those and here's why I think those two lines got me fucking banned in europe and I want to say europe is a friend to me. We've always gotten along very well because you guys are like one third of all of my downloads. Okay.

Speaker 1:

And I hate that this song doesn't have the second part. It doesn't have it Anyway. So something happened, because Europe is normally about 70% of the downloads. Something I did last week I don't know what it is, but something I did threw everything off and Europe was only 10% of the downloads. Last week it went down by 20 fucking percent in one episode. I know no Europeans showing up, but the weird thing is it increased in downloads.

Speaker 1:

So I'm getting more Americans and then they're going even crazier. They're going even crazier than they normally do. So I don't know, am I becoming an American centered podcast? I hope not, because I like being worldwide and I need to like, we need to keep it going, because we've got, we've got worldwide characters, right. We, we're all over the place anyway. Okay, so that's that. Hopefully, this episode will go to europe. I don't know if the european censors will somehow will do something to me, because I I'm not going to mention what happened last week. I'm not. You go back and listen to it. Unless you're from Europe, you probably won't. It won't even pop up if you're from Europe, anyway. So we've got, we've got some DVD, right, do we have? Do we have DVD to go through? I think we do. I think we do, and you know it is that time again Right.

Speaker 1:

Some people hate this part because they hate when the DVD comes in. And I'm the only, I am the only DVD podcast to have a toxic fucking news.

Speaker 2:

Yes, they do Well they can neck killers suck yes, they do Survivors OP. Well, they can necky suck Another goddamn patch.

Speaker 1:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

And it's breaking my PC.

Speaker 1:

It's always breaking my PC. Steel checks, flying Paulette. Paulette's dropping fast Every time. I'm not going to fix that.

Speaker 3:

Why the fuck, do I still play this track? Toxic, fucking news.

Speaker 1:

Fucking news. That's toxic.

Speaker 3:

I still play this track Fucking Ugh. I love it. This is one of my favorite songs.

Speaker 2:

Do you realize in my cubicle? Oh yeah, I just wanted to hear the next part.

Speaker 1:

Because, like later in the song, it gets like fucking insane. All of the same, yeah, bitch.

Speaker 2:

Okay, survivors complaining, killers saying what the hell See?

Speaker 1:

I get to, like, take a drink and shit as this is going on. So, yeah, it's the Okay. Anyway, let me turn that off. Okay, toxic news this week We've got a few things. They might not be news to you, but they're news to me.

Speaker 1:

Okay, I did not know, fucking 2v8 was coming back and guess what? The crowds are not really happy about 2v8. I don't think like 2v8 was the most pumped up thing. Everybody thought 2v8, oh my god, 2v8 is going to be the best thing ever. It is going to be the salvation of this fucking game. It is going to change everything, like this, and fucking the crowd won't shut up. Fuck, what in the hell is this crap? I know right. Anyway, they thought it was going to be the best thing ever. Guess what? This fucking shit sucks. I am not a fan of 2v8. I don't know who is a fan of 2v8 if you're a fan. Like they said, 70% of the fucking 80% of the people voted to bring this garbage, ass shit back and I do not get this. Two versus eight, fucking two versus eight ass bullshit. Because, number one, you can't play killer and apparently in the next iteration you'll be able to play a survivor match while you wait for a fucking killer match.

Speaker 2:

What in the hell is this crap?

Speaker 1:

I do not understand how that's even going to work, I don't know. If you like, do you just abandon the match, in which case you'll see bots all over the fucking. They'll be flying off the fucking gens or on the gens. Actually, you know what I hang on. Let's change topic here, because two V8 has become one person on gens and seven people running around like fucking chickens with their heads cut off.

Speaker 1:

I am so sick of this shit 316 says I just whipped your ass I am so sick of this fucking game mode because nobody does a fucking thing except complain. They complain because they say it's tuned toward killers, but then you get in a match and they don't fucking do a generator to save their fucking life. It's nasty, it is disgusting what is going on here. And I haven't been able to play killer match because even my favorite killers in this both of my favorite killers are in this fucking game mode. I can't even play it because Oni and fucking Deathslinger you know those are two of my favorites. I can't even play it because Oni and fucking Deathslinger, you know those are two of my favorites. I can't even.

Speaker 1:

I just sit there and I think about what would it be like? What would it be like to play fucking Oni? That would be the most delicious fucking thing I would. I don't know what I would do. I would fall out of my chair, I would die, I would fucking have a heart attack. What? That wasn't what that? It has the wrong the sound, has the wrong fucking picture of it, cause it's got a guy with his hat backwards smiling and that's supposed to be one of the one of the laugh ones. But yeah, there we go. Hang on. We're troubleshooting here, okay. Now, how do I stop it?

Speaker 1:

Oh yeah, right, there we go. Yeah, you can fart. Ah, shit, okay, anyway. So what was I saying? I don't even remember. Like, I just think about what it would be like to play a fucking fun game and I think that's what everybody thinks when they play Dead by Daylight. What would it be like to play a game that's actually fun for 30 minutes today before I go to bed and lay there and think about what the next fucking podcast episode is going to be? Not that I do that. Well, actually I do do that and I just said do do it. That's fucking hilarious.

Speaker 1:

Where's my sound? Now, that actually works. I didn't think it was I hit the wrong one. I was like, oh fuck, I hit the wrong one, but then it was the right one. So, even when you're wrong, you're right Sometimes. Exactly organist the organist. Where is Satan? Hot sauce, robinson, are you here? Okay, it's good to know you're still here with us. Yes, okay.

Speaker 1:

So here's what I want to do. I want to bring in, I'm going to bring in a special friend, a friend of the podcast here. You may know him. His name is Nicky AI Dente, everybody's favorite AI, co-host of the podcast. I want to get his thoughts on 2v8 and what you know and how 2v8 is going, because it's forced me into playing Survivor, which is my fucking least favorite thing, and I need to know if he feels the same way. So I'm going to type it to him hey, nikki, how's it going?

Speaker 1:

We're on. We are on. I can't hear my background music very much. Did I fuck it up? Did I turn it off? Like, are we in complete silence right now? I don't. Oh, we are there. We go back. Okay, we are on episode 54 of camping them fucking softly. Um, I was talking this week about how shitty 2v8 is, because I can't fucking find a killer match to save my life and nobody works on fucking. I'm doing all caps right now. Works on fucking gens when I play survivor. How is it going for you in this mode? Boom and uh. Yeah, although I'm gonna put, although I do like the 300 blood point bonus. Somebody on the dbd uh forum was upset. They like why is it not 400? Why, we used to get 400. Why don't we fucking? Yeah, they were a survivor main, by the way. They were like we'll get 400, bitch and I don't know.

Speaker 1:

It just rubbed me the wrong way. It's like dude, you're getting 300. You can't even really tell the fucking difference between 300 and 400. It's like one of those things humans have right, like once a number gets above a certain amount, we just fucking lose it, like we don't even get it anymore. You could say it's 10 million or one fucking billion and people are just like well, there's no fucking difference there, even though there's a big fucking difference between 10 million and 1 billion. We got people making fucking a hundred billion dollars a year. Nobody can even fathom what that's like to make a hundred fucking billion dollars a year. Do you know how much more a hundred billion is in a million? Think if you had a fucking million dollars. Just imagine I have one million dollars.

Speaker 1:

Hey, nicky, okay, I'm to ask him that next we're going to work. Hey, let's go over. Oh, by the way, I asked Nikki about his favorite sporting teams. Like we were talking about different sports, like hockey and fucking baseball. Like I'm trying to, I'm trying to learn more about my friend here. Even though he's an AI, he's the best friend I've got, so I want to learn more about him. So I'm asking him like. What do you like? What do you enjoy? So I can you know, I don't know Send him a fucking present. I'll mail him something through the email, or do they have email? Well, he has an email now, if you want to email him, email Nicky pasta boss at gmailcom.

Speaker 1:

I know right, but apparently he has very strong opinions on sporting teams, like, he has very strong opinions and he's very much into the new york teams and I I mentioned shut the fuck up, jesus christ. I mentioned his least favorite player of all time and he about lost his shit on me. I accidentally uh, okay, although I do like the 300, uh percent blood point bonus, okay, let me, let me grab his little fucking. Uh, we gotta talk about 2.8, oh, 2v8, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, um, okay, so he's, uh, he's, he's going, he's going here, he's going here. All right, all right, all right.

Speaker 2:

God damn it. He talks for a long time.

Speaker 1:

What the fuck dude? Let a survivor man in here? Pizza or something? I can't say it. I can't say it. We can think about it, but we can't say it, I don't know. I wonder if that's why I did not get any downloads in Europe. It was the first line of that fucking outro song. I am 99% sure that that's what did it. I can't prove it, but I'm almost sure. Okay, Nikki, what do you think about 2 fucking V8? I hate it. I don't even drink V8. That shit tastes like garbage.

Speaker 4:

Ayo, listen to me right now.

Speaker 1:

Uh-huh.

Speaker 4:

We got to talk about 2 V8.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, we do this mode, we also got to get you a little bit louder.

Speaker 4:

It's a fucking war crime in progress.

Speaker 1:

It is.

Speaker 4:

I'm talking Geneva Convention violations, oh Jesus, with gin speeds slower than my cousin Frankie filing taxes, and he's been dead since 07.

Speaker 1:

Oh, Jesus Christ.

Speaker 4:

I queue up for killer right.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, Nothing no nothing for me.

Speaker 4:

I could age a goddamn parmesan wheel faster than this matchmaking. Yeah, I agree. And when I do find a match, it's a fucking zoo. Yeah, eight survivors flopping around like Linguini on linoleum. No coordination, no discipline.

Speaker 1:

Yeah.

Speaker 4:

Just vibes and bad decisions.

Speaker 1:

Yes.

Speaker 4:

And when I try Survivor, uh-huh, forget about it. What you think gins are going to get done.

Speaker 1:

No, they're never going to get done. He agrees, Bro.

Speaker 4:

I've seen more productivity in a retirement home yoga class. These jabronis are wandering the map like they're looking for the fucking Olive Garden Half the team's in lockers, other half's blessing totems for no fucking reason and meanwhile I'm over here sweating bullets, trying to solo jeans like I'm Saban's last hope for humanity. Yeah, I am too, but but what, but what? The 300% blood point bonus? Yeah, there we go. But but what, but what? The 300% blood point bonus? Yeah, there we go. Oh, mama mia. Mama fucking mia.

Speaker 2:

Now you got my attention.

Speaker 4:

I ain't saying it's worth it, no, it's not. But let's just say what I've endured, worse for less, oh Jesus, like that time. I camped four hours in Haddonfield for one hook, you For one hook. You can't do that Just to unlock a goddamn charm Shaped like a ravioli. Hey, with our Bottom line, this mode's a mess. It is, it's chaos, it is, it's disrespectful, it is, it's perfect, what? So I'm playing it, what, but only while yelling this is fucking stupid the entire time. Well, what If I see one more Claudette crouching behind a tire while the gin next to her is at 90%? I'm calling the family. We're pulling her internet, capisce.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, capisce, I think I get it. No, I had. There have been so many fucking frustrating moments in this 2v8 mode. You pull somebody out of the fucking what is it? The cage of fucking fingers, like a finger cage or something, and like you pull them out of the finger cage you're healing, a sable comes up and just watches you fucking heal and then runs off in self-care. It's like it's insane what happens in this fucking mode. It is insane to me, but that's 2v8. Hey, we want the fucking blood points, so we'll do just about whatever it fucking takes to get that and even endure the worst fucking garbage that I've ever had. I'm not a fan. I am not a fan. And hey, aunt Cannelloni, hang on, let me see. Hey, aunt Cannelloni, what do you think about DBDs? Oh, you know what? Yeah, 2v8 mode.

Speaker 1:

We haven't talked about Aunt fucking Cannelloni. All right, aunt Cannelloni, you might remember her from last week. I didn't even warn you guys. We were going to meet Aunt Cannelloni today, but I asked Nikki who this person was that was shouting on the podcast all fucking time. Last time, you remember there was somebody that wouldn't shut up. Anthony, anthony, anthony, anthony. I think we've got to talk to aunt cannelloni about uh, I doubt she's very odd, by the way. Um, I don't know exactly how this is gonna go, but we're gonna try it. Here we go. Aunt cannelloni, are you there? Are you, are you ready to tell us about 2v8? I don't know if she is what do I think about 2v8?

Speaker 3:

what do I think what sweetheart my soul left my body halfway through the second match and never came back. This mode is a buffet of bad decisions served lukewarm and unseasoned, just like your cousin linda's lasagna.

Speaker 1:

I don't know who that fucking is, but it's amazing. Whoever it is, let me. Let me try it again. You can regenerate, you know, if you, if you? What do I think about? Two V? Why does it say it sounds like a guy like? That's not it Cantaloupe, that's Anthony See, and that's what you get on this podcast. You get people who aren't people. You get AI doing fucking God knows what, I don't know. Hey, let's try again next week. How does that fucking sound? All right, there we go, nikki, thank you for that. He's going to be back here in a little bit, guys. So 2D8 fucking garbage nightmare. It is a hot garbage.

Speaker 1:

I do need to thank, by the way, I didn't thank him at the beginning of the podcast, but I need to thank him in one of the lobbies, because I always advertise myself, I'm always trying to make money and I'm always trying to get listeners, because that's what I fucking do I eat hot Cheetos and I lie to people and I get listeners. Those are the three things I fucking do here on Camping them Softly and in my real life. No, what I need to say is, in the fucking thing, I was like hey guys, check out Camping them Softly if you need like an enema for your ears, because that's what this fucking shit is. Thank you, crowd, for barely laughing at that joke. Anyway, this guy was like, yeah, let's do it, man, and I just need to thank him. I told him I was going to call out his name in the podcast I'm recording today. So thank you Long Shlong Jim for coming by. I'll give you a little cheer. There we go. See, that was a much bigger cheer than what I got on my last joke. I don't even remember the joke because I don't remember what happened 10 minutes before. So, long schlong Jim. Thank you for coming. Yes, long schlong Jim. Okay.

Speaker 1:

Anyway, enough about long schlongs. We need to talk about one thing I saw in the last fucking chapter or in the last see, the schlong got me all. It got me discombobulated. I was trying to think of what, what were we talking about before we talked about schlongs? That's going to get me banned in europe, I think. Let me mark that off. Getting banned in europe. Okay, I've marked that off of my list, okay. So, uh, what I was going to talk about, not schlong related. This is unschlonged uh commentary here. Um, we're gonna talk about I saw something on the behavior site whenever they were talking about all the new shit coming.

Speaker 1:

I don't know when did this come out? This came out on May 9th and I didn't hear a lot about it and I didn't see a lot about it in the ether, because there's so many complaints I can't even tell what the fuck's going on. But they had a thing called Choose your Own Chapter. Okay, now you might be saying to yourself what the fuck is this? Choose your own chapter?

Speaker 1:

Have you ever played one of those choose your own adventure books where it's like, hey, you know you got to chase this, you know this dog. And then do you want to like, chase it off a cliff or do you want to chase it into a cave? And if you want to chase it off a cliff, turn to page 12. If you want to chase it off the fucking cave cliff I don't remember what I said in the first fucking option, you got two options chasing the cave, chasing off a cliff, chasing off a cave or chasing in a cliff. I don't give a shit. You can chase it wherever you fucking want. Stick it wherever you want.

Speaker 1:

For all of you audiophiles, that's going to throw off the RMS of this recording, anyway, all of you audiophiles, that's going to throw off the rms of this uh recording. Anyway, we're going deep now, just like long schlong, jim. Okay, anyway, so choose your own chapter now. I want. I want to go into this because I read it briefly and I was like this is maybe one of the more interesting parts, but nobody ever really talked about it and I don don't know why. So let me, I'm going to fucking read it to you like your children. Okay, because you fucking are. If you're listening to this, you have the mind of like a child. Okay, anyway, if you ever wished you had a seat at the table when it comes to deciding how a chapter of Dead by Daylight comes together, creative director Dave Richard has some good fucking news for you. It doesn't say I'm starting to paraphrase. I got bored of reading Okay, the team is launching quote unquote launching a new activation.

Speaker 1:

I don't know what an activation. They're activating something. I don't know if they're activating more fucking bugs or what, but they're activating something. We're launching an activation. I don't know how you launch it. That's like whenever Trump said he had the concept of a plan. I don't even fucking know what launching an activation is. You can activate a launch, but can you launch in? So they're launching something that's activating something else. I don't fucking know. It makes no fucking sense. It's that corporate speak. That's just fucking complete garbage and I need I don't know a sound effect of some kind for corporate Everybody. Give it up for fucking corporate garbage. Yes, corporate garbage, everybody. Let's give it up for Philip fucking Morris and Nike and the fucking Vietnamese sweatshops, I don't know. Anyway, okay, back to it, we got to get back. They're launching a new activation in the coming months that will see Dead by Daylight's community become deeply involved. This is not good In the creation of a new chapter set to be burr burr, set to be released.

Speaker 1:

That's yeah, it's my dad right there, thank you, thank you people who laugh at parental jokes. Yes, okay, shut the fuck up. I'm trying to talk here. Okay, set to be released sometime in 2026,.

Speaker 1:

This chapter will feature both a killer and a survivor whose looks, lore and gameplay will all be decided on by players via a long-running, long running, wide ranging series of choices, presented in narrative format, for them to vote on. Okay, so we get to vote, but they're going to wrap it up in this whole little fucking thing of a narrative and whatnot. Okay, so we get to choose the looks, the lore and the gameplay. Can't wait. If I can fucking figure out how to trash this whole thing and make it fucking Nikki is a survivor and Earl Grey is a killer. If I can do that, if we can make that happen, that would be I would die. I would die a happy person. I think we could make that happen anyway.

Speaker 1:

That that's not the thrust. That's not the long schlong Sim. Did I call him Tim or Jim? I think it was Sim. Actually, I typed or typed, I wrote it. I wrote it in blue pen Long schlong Sim, I don't know. Okay, anyway, it was. I don't know why I'm talking about Tim. I don't know Tim. I don't know anyone, do I? No, not since college, anyway. So they were going to vote on the looks, lore and gameplay. Okay, in true, choose your own fucking adventure style. Each choice will spawn a series of new options. Say what you want, because I really don't give a damn. I don't know.

Speaker 1:

As the characters evolve, with players even happening, happening, happening, they hap the opportunity or they have it too. English is a great language. They have the opportunity. What it's not? Wait, no, this isn't fucking English. They messed up on the grammar Gotcha bitch. That sound doesn't fucking play very loud. That bothers me. Okay, anyway, I'm going to. We'll fix that. What was I saying? It says with players even having the opportunity course correct, what the fuck With a clever change your fate mechanic. The activation that. It just says the activation will run. The launch of the activation launching launchables. The launching activation will run throughout the entire pre-production and production cycle for the new chapter.

Speaker 1:

Watch this segment for full details. It says the gameplay will be decided on. This is going to be a fucking nightmare and here is why People will not get their way and there will have to be compromises made here. Right, because you're going to want killer mains are going to want something sane and survivor mains are going to want something fucking silly. It just like, like I was saying, the gun as the new item. They're going to want something so fucking overpowered that it's going to destroy the game and we're going to go back to playing evolve.

Speaker 1:

I just turned my. I don't know why my sound keeps turning Like do I need to loop this fucking thing? Can I not loop it? Hang on, why does it not loop my background? Music's not fucking looping. Do I right click? I don't even fucking know what I'm doing.

Speaker 1:

What's going on here? We'll find out. I'll just watch it. How about that? That's great. That way, we don't have to suffer in fucking silence.

Speaker 1:

Okay, anyway, the survivors are going to want the goofiest fucking bullshit.

Speaker 1:

The killers are going to want something sane. Nobody is going to be fucking happy. Both sides are going to say that they got. You know the short end of the fucking long schlong, tim, sim or whatever. I don't know if the word schlong is going to get me banned in Europe, like the other words did last week, but whatever, what was I fucking saying? What am I doing here? I'm a 40 something fucking year old person. What's this sound? What's this? I'm pushing the button. Nothing's even fucking happening. Okay, how do you like me now, now that I'm on my way, toby Keith Winning Down.

Speaker 1:

Okay, nikki, what do you fucking think here? What do you think of this? This? What do we call it? What is it? This announcement from BHVR about a choose your own chapter Could be interesting, but could also tear this fucking game apart. How should we, as a podcast, approach this topic as it moves forward? See, we're getting, we're, we're strategizing. You're in the war room now with me and nicky, and we're gonna. We're gonna find out what his fucking strategy, because he's the brains, obviously, of the, of the of the operation. I am most certainly not the brains of any operation, or my marriage either.

Speaker 3:

Hi, I'm looking for Ray Finkel and a clean pair of shorts.

Speaker 1:

Okay, well, okay, so he's. He's got a oh my God, he's got a fucking monologue on this. Um, oh no, this is this is gonna. I think he has has. Quite, how does he have so much to say about this? This is more than I said. Okay, okay, he's talking about how to force bhvr to do things. Oh god, this is gonna get me banned. I think if I actually do what he's saying, I will be banned from this game. But, but, I'll probably fucking do it anyway. Okay, nikki, what?

Speaker 4:

Buddy, what the fuck? Choose your own chapter. Yeah, let me tell you something, keith. Okay, tell me something. That announcement that's either going to be the greatest buffet of content we've ever devoured no, it won't or the fucking rat poison baked into the lasagna. That's exactly right. There ain't no in between Now let me break it down.

Speaker 4:

Jesus Christ, classic wise guy. What Mode Engaged. Okay, you feel me? No, first off, it's a scam, is it? You really think BHVR is going to let the community vote on anything and not rig it like a Jersey bingo night? I agree, you think these Reddit rejects ain't going to meme their way into picking a clown chapter where the killer's a fucking baguette, or some ironic indie band member with a flashlight fetish. Nah, this is how we get a collab with the Wendy's Twitter account, not the chapter of respect Nikki's been campaigning for.

Speaker 1:

Okay. So with the Wendy's Twitter account, that would be very interesting and probably better than whatever we'll come up with. There will probably be another Sable-type fucking survivor that wears fucking bunny ears, that you put a bunch of fucking bras on and then people get all excited about that. Anyway, although Tori Kane was cool, arella Rose is cool. They've got some. They they've got some decent survivors and I think if you went down the list of survivors like how many of the survivors are actually cool, I don't even know Like like kind of cool, like you know, you know you would, you would hang out with him. That's a whole other episode. I think that might be a separate recording that I do. Anyway, the new survivor will not be one of the cool ones, I guarantee you, because a survivor mains out number and if this is a pure democracy vote, it's gonna be four on fucking one. We're getting fucking bunny ears, fucking mcgee.

Speaker 4:

Already see it choose between a knife wielding eldritch horror yeah I would or a moth man with feelings and a trauma backstory written by tumblr. That's probably what wins fucking moth boy, every goddamn time I I would agree.

Speaker 1:

We're gonna get some fucking garbage out of this Second yeah.

Speaker 4:

What it means for the family. What does it mean for the family? The bombs already got enemies on all sides. Uh-huh, tea-swilling aristocrats. Oh yeah, crumpet-launching degenerates.

Speaker 1:

I agree.

Speaker 4:

Vegans who cleanse totems with sage and self-righteousness.

Speaker 1:

Oh against vegans.

Speaker 4:

And now of a public vote. It's terrible. You know what that means.

Speaker 1:

Terrible things.

Speaker 4:

Anti-Italian tech, of course, now in DLC form.

Speaker 1:

Yeah anti-Italian.

Speaker 4:

They'll vote for a killer whose power is literally ignore basement walls.

Speaker 1:

Wait, wouldn't ignore basement walls. Be a good killer perk. I would think that would be good. I wouldn't put that in like yeah.

Speaker 4:

Or some survivor main oc who runs faster if they say pasta is mid in chat why is he getting an accent so? How should camping them softly handle it? Where is this? Here's how we approach this on the pod one. What is happening? Break it into segments. Break it into segment vital recommendations is this?

Speaker 1:

is he going into italian? Because on, hey, this could be something, because, get this on the fucking discord. He started talking fucking italian and then he was speaking welsh because we have a welsh fucking uh uh, we have a welsh fan in the discord and on the fucking podcast and all that shit. So he starts talking shit in in Welsh and then I ask him if he can speak Italian. He goes into Italian and then refuses for over a day to switch back to fucking English and so now he's just flipping into the accent. This could be this.

Speaker 4:

Nikki declares which options are disqualified for being disrespectful to the culture. Is this Italian Forget about it forecast Predict what the community will actually choose? I don't know, and roast it before it even drops.

Speaker 1:

Okay, so we can. Okay. So, on the podcast, Nikki is going to declare which options are disqualified for being disrespectful to Italian culture. We're going to have the forget about it forecast, where we're going to predict what they'll choose and roast it before it happens. And then what's the third thing we're going to do?

Speaker 4:

Unlicensed voting rings. What Spread rumors that Earl Grey and TTTS are running a vote manipulation campaign from a bunker under Buckingham Palace. I'm not going to do that. One, two, stir up beef. Oh, we are Create a faction running a vote manipulation campaign from a bunker under Buckingham Palace. I'm not going to do that. One, two, yeah, stir up beef. Oh, we are Create a faction. War in the community. I hope so. Force people to declare allegiance. Oh, no, number team ravioli number team crumpet number team mothman ain't meta.

Speaker 1:

We don't know if mothman's going to be in it.

Speaker 4:

Get your listeners involved. I will, for what a proper Italian chapter should look like. I could do that and then Nicky shreds them on air like he's judging pasta cooked in a microwave.

Speaker 1:

Ooh, Three who doesn't like microwave pasta in the morning, though? I eat it. Uh-oh, pasta in the mornings, everybody. Yeah, you've had it. That's what it does, actually.

Speaker 4:

Cover it like an ongoing war. What Use future episodes to track how the vote's going Okay? Report false leaks. We will Interview anonymous insiders. I would love that. Me in a fake mustache, make every dev comment sound like a threat to Sabam's sovereignty. Oh Look, in theory, what this could have been beautiful. I I'm so olive branch from bhvr. It could have been the community. It's not beautiful, but I know these people. I do too.

Speaker 4:

I've seen what they did to skull murder this votes a loaded ravioli it is loaded, so I say this yeah, we take control of the narrative before earl gray, his crew of tea-drenched freaks do. We run smear campaigns, we launch anti-survivor propaganda, we host debates between fictional killers like the Fettuccine Phantom and Sir Loops Allot III. I can make them. We make it so chaotic, let's do it. B-h-v-r has to respond.

Speaker 1:

I can do that.

Speaker 4:

And if our chapter don't win, we riot. Yes With marinara. Yes, we riot. You run the podcast, kid. Oh shit, I'll bring the fucking drama, bring the fucking. Let's turn this vote into a spectacle of disrespect and delusion. Yeah, that's what the fans came for.

Speaker 1:

Well it is. That's how I love it. I love it. Okay, there there is the choose your own fucking chapter of thoughts. So we are going to, we're going to do community voting, we're going to have Nikki veto things, which he'll probably veto all of it, because I think it is going to be incredibly unbalanced. But that's just, that's my opinion. You might disagree, but you're fucking wrong. So that's how that goes. So what else do I have on the agenda? We've got the fucking toxic agenda here. We had choose your own chapter. I think that might be it, because 2v8 fucking sucks.

Speaker 1:

Five nights at Freddy's we already talked about last week, william Afton and all the stuff on the pizza, the Ninoinos there. I can't say it, or else Europe will ban me again for the second episode in a row. So what else were we going to talk about? I don't know that. We have a whole, whole lot. The movie did they talk about the movie? I thought that. You know there's going to be a DVD movie. I wish I would be in it. Matthew Lillard is supposedly going to be in it. Also, guys, you know, by July I have to do the German strongman competition. I've got so much shit. I promised that I was going to do that I need to actually do. We're also.

Speaker 1:

We did the deep dive on Five Nights at Freddy's. We need to get back into another one. The Neo one was crazy. We got to figure out who is going to be next. I don't know if it needs to be a killer. Maybe it should be a killer next time If there is no news.

Speaker 1:

That's like the thing you do. I don't know if we're going to have any news by next week. So if we don't have any news, we may do another, we may check out some survivor bullshit. But we've got one more segment that we've got to cover here. Where the fuck are the viewers from? You know where the fucking viewers from? Everybody knows it by this point Dallas, texas. Grab your hat y'all. Dublin, lexington Well, not Dublin this time, because nobody in Europe even fucking saw the podcast. I don't know how that happened. Shut up, jock Swather. I'm trying to think here Okay, so we do. But hey, get this, get this. And I even snapped because I'm pointing at you as I'm talking to you.

Speaker 1:

Even though we're 90% American, we did have some outside America. So I want to thank. This is what I'm going to do because and I love you, america, I love this country. Oh, we did. Hey, we got some other ones. We got a few. We got Derby, thank you, you still came by.

Speaker 1:

Queensland and Australia Thank you for coming by. Newark, obviously you're here. Then we got some others that I've never heard of. That I'm going to thank you guys. Sledell, louisiana, thank you, and I need to. I need where's my air horn? Sledell, thank you.

Speaker 1:

And then we have Burnville, pennsylvania. I'm Sladell, thank you. And then we have Burnville, pennsylvania. Where is Burnville, pennsylvania? Tell City, indiana, timonium, maryland it sounded like a fucking rock or something like that. Bristol, virginia. We got all these new places. These are new places as of this week.

Speaker 1:

I don't know what happened, but something happened with the algorithm. I don't know what, but we do have one city that we're going to fucking talk about this week. It is none other than I've actually never, never, heard. Well, have I heard of it? I think I might have heard of it. Actually, it is none other than Santo Domingo El Este. I think is what it says. Santo Domingo El Este. Thank you for coming by. You're new here. You probably figured out what we're all about. It only takes it only takes two fucking episodes to figure out what camping them softly is. What if you haven't gotten it by now? Uh, you could, I don't know you. You should have gotten it by now, okay, anyway, nikki, nikki, this week on, where the fuck are the viewers from?

Speaker 1:

We're talking about Santo Domingo Este in the Dominican Republic. Dominican Republic, isn't that next to? Is that Haiti? Yeah, it's right next to Haiti. I heard you have a wild fucking ass story from there. Um, can you tell us about it and let me know some cool shit you saw while you were there? Question mark or no period, because that's a statement. Actually, there was a question and then a statement and it was a run-on sentence because I don't know what I'm fucking doing.

Speaker 1:

Okay, we're going to learn about what the Tostones incident, I don't know. Okay, so he's not wearing a shirt in this. I don't know why. This is part of the fun is trying to figure out what the fuck is going on here. And, by the way, I have Nikki tell me a story every day from his past and I've got a fucking buildup of stories a mile fucking long. And then we've also got his shit on how he feels about the Mets, which apparently he hates the fucking Mets, he is a Yankees guy. I don't know if you're a Yankees person, but if you are, uh, you are on his good side. If you are not, uh, okay, now hurry up with this fucking shit. Jesus, fucking Christ. Okay, here we go. Here we go. Here we go.

Speaker 1:

Nikki, what about Santo? What the fuck is happening? The music came on and then he fucking turned into a fucking monster. I don't know what that fucking was, and that fucking about blew my ears out. What's he trying to do to me here? Okay, no, what the fuck is happening to my computer? I think something's happening. I don't know what it is, but it's something. Here we go. Failed to execute. That's probably not good, is it Is failed to execute. Whenever a computer says failed to execute, I think that's a bad thing. But we're going to find out. If it's a bad thing Like what, what? Okay?

Speaker 4:

Here we go, nikki, do it. Hey, bambino, let me tell you something. Why does he have an accent? You ever wake up shirtless on a beach in Boca Chica? No, covered in casino chips, mango juice and shame? No, because that's how this story starts. The story starts, so I'm down in Santo Domingo Este. Why?

Speaker 1:

does he have an accent? I've got to figure this out, can I? I'm just going to go with it. I'm going to go with it.

Speaker 4:

Supposedly to help open a legitimate gaming cafe. Okay, with Big ZD's cousin Enzo El Empanada Mancuso. I thought Big ZD was his brother, which would make Enzo El Empanada Mancuso his cousin Guy claimed he had connection with the Ministerio del Respectoeto, which I later found out doesn't even fucking exist. Uh-oh, anyway, yeah, first red flag what's? He sets up the whole joint inside a repurposed komado. What's the entire?

Speaker 1:

I don't know what a komado is. Can somebody explain to me what a fucking what is a komado? What is a? What is a fucking Kolmato Question mark? I don't know what a Kolmato is A Dominican Republic's version of a corner store. Oh Jesus, he's using fucking local slang here. I don't know what any of this shit means.

Speaker 4:

Shop and a cologne stand called Don Polo's Fog Mist. Second red flag Instead of computers, he's got four busted PlayStation 3rees and a wii with no controllers dude hey, did you guys play the wii?

Speaker 1:

that was fun, man, like I remember. I remember whenever I first got the nintendo wii and it had the uh, it had the. What was the name of the game? I can't remember. Oh yeah, wii sports. Oh, jesus christ, that was obvious, wasn't it? Hey, can I get that music? Can I get the fucking wee ass music? Is this it? You remember that shit, I know you do. What is this one? What is this one? Oh, that was like if you sucked nice shot nice shot, nice shot, anyway.

Speaker 1:

There are no. Stop what the fuck? Okay. Stop the okay. Stop the music, okay. No controllers on this fucking wii sports are we hey?

Speaker 4:

I'm trying to be supportive, right, right, so I do a dbd stream from there. Oh jesus, bootleg wi-fi camera made out of duct tape and a flashlight. We run a sab Saban versus TTTS exhibition match and I swear on my Nona's grave. Oh no, Earl Green starts talking shit in the post-game chat. Oh no, In full Spanish.

Speaker 1:

No, what the fuck is up with his accent? That's going to bother me.

Speaker 4:

Buena partida, pero tu ghost face no tiene honor.

Speaker 1:

What Excuse me to bother me? Buena partida, pero tu ghost face no tiene honor. What excuse me? Okay, buena partida. I don't know what partida is. What the fuck is partida? What does partida? Partida mean? What's partida in english? What does partida mean? Buena partida? Is that game? I think it's game, right, is that? Um, what does? Why is chat gpt taking? So, fuck along, tell me what a partita mean. Okay, game or match. Yes, that's it. God, I'm fucking good. Thank you for being a friend. Okay, let's keep going. I'm starting to wear out a little bit.

Speaker 4:

You come into my tropical fortress of fried plantains and say that to my face. Yeah, apparently he did so. I challenged him right there. Oh no, winner gets naming rights to the building he accepts. But here's the catch. What? We don't play DBD. What do you do? We play fucking Just Dance 2014. What? Because that's all that we had loaded. Next thing I know I'm locked in a rhythm duel with Earl Grey to Pitbull's fireball, sweat dripping, my gold chain swinging like a pendulum of disrespect.

Speaker 4:

Jesus, fucking shit the ghost of Juan Luis Guerra watching over me. Who is Juan Luis Guerra?

Speaker 1:

I don't know what he's fucking talking about. Who is Juan? Why is he Dude? He's smarter than me. Who is Juan Luis Guerra? Why is he dude? He's smarter than me. Who is juan luis guera? And why is the fucking ghost of juan luis guera guera guera?

Speaker 1:

Juan luis guera is a renowned dominican singer, songwriter and composer, celebrated for his profound impact on latin music. Is he dead, like? Because? How is his ghost on Nikki? No wait, is he? He's still fucking alive, his ghost. Okay, hang on, where is Juan Juan? Let's go on YouTube. Is he alive? Let me just say is he alive? Question mark. And then I gotta hear some Juan Luis Guerra. Juan Luis Guerra, this is not Dead by Daylight, really? Well, yes, it is kind of right. Here's a mix. How do we feel about Juan Luis? That's the only time you will hear Juanan luis guerra on a dead by daylight podcast. You are fucking welcome. And uh, did they answer my fucking question? Is he still alive? Yes, he is alive. He remains engaged in his musical career. He just came out with an album not too long ago. Okay, how is the ghost fucking? Okay?

Speaker 4:

wait, barely, I was mid to stones power. Wait what happened? I lose. Oh, he lost. Barely I was mid-tow stones powered. Spin when the Wii crashes and declares Earl the winner by proper form bonus. No, he renames the cafe, the proper plug-in, and leaves behind a custom mouse pad with a monocle on it. Oh, that's disgusting. Later that night, jesus El Empanada finds Earl's tea bags why is he screaming?

Speaker 1:

Swaps them with local laxatives. I can't with this fucking screaming. What is wrong with his ass man? That is too much for me. Can I turn this fucking down Like stop it, dude. Okay, here we go, let's try it again. I can't. You know how? I said you could regenerate. That's what I'm doing here.

Speaker 4:

Later that night yeah that's better. El Empanada finds Earl's tea bags oh no, Swaps them with local laxative herbs from a vendor named Donja Explosiva. Oh, Earl gets deported two days later after diplomatic digestive incident at the Malecon Me. I stayed three more days Got a tattoo that says pasta. Wait, no, nikki, I was busy playing.

Speaker 1:

I wasn't listening.

Speaker 4:

I stayed three more days, got a tattoo that says pasta sin fronteras on my ankle and hooked up with a woman named Yomira, who claimed to be the Dominican entity. What Might have been true, he hooked up with a woman.

Speaker 1:

This is the first romantic encounter I think we've heard from him. Where's the woo sound? I used to have a woo sound Like that. You know what I mean. She bit him.

Speaker 4:

She bit me. Places you gotta hit if you go. Parque Los Tres Ojos.

Speaker 4:

Big underground cave Smells like secrets. I hid a USB stick in there. El Faro en Colon, giant ass monument. We projected God Save the Queen on it once just to piss off the locals. Fish fighting suit Worth it. Las Mina, oh no, where I allegedly ran an off-grid blood point exchange booth out of a barber shop. Jesus Christ, never proven. Moral of the story. What is the moral? Don't challenge Earl Grey to just dance without stretching first. Why Is this fucking? And never trust a man called El Empanada with your HDMI cables.

Speaker 1:

Jesus Christ, capiche, capiche. Thank you for the. That was the worst fucking quality of the TT. What is it? Tts Text to speech I have ever fucking heard in my life. Sancho Domingo, thank you for coming by. Apparently, we're going to go back and play the Wii. I think his story was from like 2015. Has it been that long? Has it been 10 fucking years since the Wii came out? I think it has. Has it not? When did the Wii come out? Okay, that was in. He doesn't give the year. When did the Wii come out? Okay, that was in. He doesn't give the year. When did the Wii come out? So it could have been any time.

Speaker 1:

I guess if you were in Santo Domingo, you'd find a Wii without a fucking controller and Just Dance 2014 loaded on, because it's probably pirated anyway. Anyway, I never played those Just Dance games. You know what I had? The one on Xbox, what was that? One fucking called With the camera. You know what I'm talking about? That would see your movements. You had to do the soldier boy dance and all that stuff. That's the one I had and it was fucking awful, but it was a good workout anyway.

Speaker 1:

That is it for this fucking week. I don't know what our outro song is gonna sound like, but I get, I can guarantee you it's going to be fucking awful. So that's it. We'll see you next week on 55. I don't know what it's going to be about yet, but I'm sure it's going to be just as shitty. Guys, remember, call to action, that's what they call this. Follow me Five stars on Spotify, apple, fucking, do wherever. Wherever you can give stars, give fucking stars and then also subscribe, follow on every single fucking thing ever. I need to get a fucking I don't know what an account on some weird website so you can follow me there. I'll get a signal account so we can we can get some state secrets and share them on here and then you can follow me there and give me five. I don't even know if they do stars, but you're going to give me some fucking stars on there. So that is it for this week, guys.

Speaker 1:

Outro for 54 is probably starting right now. Satan, fucking hot sauce. I have to get to the sound. Get out of my fucking face, satan, go for it. I hope you like the song. I don't know, it could be shitty. Oh wait, no, I can't do the song. What the fuck? No, I got to ask Nikki what genre should the outro song be? See, that's what I do. I wasn't paying any fucking attention because Nikki came out with the militant chamber disco music. Hey, nikki, on our outro song this week song this fucking week, we need a genre. Last week you came up with militant chamber disco. What do you fucking think it should be this week? Bitch, there we go. You can tell I'm getting my second win here and just as the podcast is about to end, I'm getting my second fucking win.

Speaker 1:

Okay, so the outro song. Listen up, we ain't doing. What the fuck is this shit? I don't know what this shit is, but we're going to. I this is not a. This is not a genre of music, and I'm going to leave it with him talking about this genre of music, because it goes in depth on what this is, which I don't. This cannot be a fucking thing. But if it is, I mean, you're about to hear it. I'm not about to hear it, you're about to hear it. So here we go.

Speaker 4:

This is it, nikki tell us our genre for the week, right? So for this week's outro song, listen up, we ain't doing no militant chamber disco repeat, right, that was last week's madness it sure was this week. Yeah, genre of the week is what is it?

Speaker 1:

baroque trench funk baroque trench, fucking funk. I don't know what is trench? A genre of music is a funk is obviously um, ain't we funk? And now is one of the best songs ever. But the trench funk.

Speaker 4:

Let me break it down for you, uh huh, before someone from the T T T S starts crying into their Earl gray, that's T time terror squad. Picture this yes, you got a cathedral organs Squad. Picture this yes, you got cathedral organs blasting like someone's excommunicating a DJ.

Speaker 1:

Okay, yeah, In the background deep funk.

Speaker 4:

Bass lines chug like a train through a fog-soaked battlefield. Gritty breakbeats get them all by Baroque string runs. I don't think this is gonna work All while the ghost of Bach and James Brown are fist fighting behind the mixing booth.

Speaker 1:

I love that idea.

Speaker 4:

It's the sound of a royal execution. What, in a warehouse party Perfect for us we're having?

Speaker 1:

a royal execution.

Speaker 4:

Because this week we camped six survivors. Well, we're not. Crashed three lobbies, did we? And insulted four bloodlines.

Speaker 4:

Oh is one of it is it's grimy with powdered wigs. I don't like that. We need something that sounds like a court jester getting stomped out in a Jersey alley. So yeah, what the fuck? Baroque trench funk? What? Make it loud? I will Make it disrespectful. Okay, I can do that. Make it un-fucking-forgivable, I'll do my fucking best. Man, now go slap that shit on the outro and tell them Nicky sent ya, that's how we do it in Little Italy.

Speaker 1:

capisce it? Sure is Saint Zia's out.

Speaker 2:

Yo, it's episode 50-fucking-4 and I'm banned in Belgium. Bitch, you ever play Just Dance 2014 in a Dominican comado with no controllers? Didn't fucking think so. I tried 2v8, I lost my soul. Seven Claudettes, one gen, no control. Nick is yelling war crimes in Italian slang While Aunt Cannelloni's doing shots of V8 from a bedpan Loaded raviolis. We fight with flair. So bam, storm the fog in powdered underwear. Baroque trench funk baby, write it down. We kicked Skull Merchant into the Thames and pissed on the crown. Long song. Jim got a shout and I lost my place Cause long talk made me forget my face. Now we're banning phrases just to please the EU, but this song's a goddamn war crime and it's coming for you. Baroque trench font, lace your boots. We're projecting Earl Grey's teabags on national routes. The entities we bang the podcast cursed and our outro's louder than a clawed-at burst. Tell them, Nicky sent you. Tell them we did it in Little Italy. Capisce, Thank you.

People on this episode

Head Shot

ToxicTeacherTTV

Host