Heal and Stay Healed with Kelly B Haney
The Heal and Stayed Healed with Kelly B Haney podcast is for anyone who is sick and tired of being sick and tired, particularly those with autoimmune disease or other chronic illness. It's for those who are ready to truly heal, and more importantly, truly STAY healed.
Through my training as a Certified Nutrition Coach, but mostly through insight gained from my personal experience with overcoming severe Ulcerative Colitis, I want to equip you to get better, stay better, and to become healthier than ever.
I've been able to stay completely autoimmune flare-free for well over a decade, and I believe that if I can do it, then you can too! Our bodies want to heal. They know how to heal. We just have to give them the support that they need.
I'm honored to walk alongside you as you take the next step in your own healing journey. Let's heal and stay healed together.
Heal and Stay Healed with Kelly B Haney
The Healing Power of Living a Simplified Life
In this episode, we explore the life-changing power of simplicity as an important part of the healing process. In a world that often feels overwhelming and chaotic, embracing a more simplified lifestyle can be a powerful tool, as it reduces stress and anxiety – two of the biggest roadblocks on our path to healing.
Kelly discusses the benefits of being intentional with our physical possessions, time commitments, and energy expenditure, while sharing practical tips and personal insights on how to simplify each of these areas. She emphasizes the importance of aligning our actions with our values and creating space for what truly matters. She also delves into the impact of simplicity on our mental and emotional health, offering strategies for cultivating a more positive and present-focused mindset.
Whether you're just beginning your healing journey or seeking to maintain your health long-term, this episode offers valuable guidance on how to harness the power of simplicity for greater healing and optimal wellness.
Website: www.kellybhaney.com
Email: info@kellybhaney.com
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Welcome to the Heal and Stay Healed podcast, where we talk about healing and, more importantly, staying healed from chronic disease and other ailments and issues. We'll cover all the crazy things about health and life the good, the bad, the ugly and the hilarious. My name is Kelly and I'm a survivor and overcomer of severe autoimmune disease, and I can't wait to share with you what I've learned so that you can heal and stay healed too. Thanks for listening and enjoy the show. Hello and welcome back to another episode of the Heal and Stay Healed with Kelly Behaney podcast.
Speaker 1:I am pumped for this episode because today I'm going to be talking about one of my favorite things, something that also happens to be a fantastic tool in the healing and staying healed toolbox, and that is simplicity. So simplicity, a simplified life, minimalism these are all related terms. Minimalism these are all related terms. When I talk about it, I'm talking about stuff, as in our physical possessions, yes, but simplicity is so much more than just our stuff. Simplicity is about how we choose to spend our time, how we spend our energy, our priorities, our relationships, our screen time, our thought life all of these things and more. Simplicity really can be a way of life, a shift from adherence to the norms and expectations of our modern society and culture, which is a culture of excess in every sense of the word. In seeking a more simple life, we step back and just examine how we live our lives honestly, evaluating our stress and anxiety levels, really thinking about what we might want to be different and examining where and how we might have the power to make helpful changes for ourselves. And then we take slow and simple steps moving toward a life that is less stressful, more purposeful, less habitual and more intentional and, by default, a life that is so much healthier for our bodies, minds and spirits. Simplicity, or a simplified life, is something that I know for sure has played a massive role in my healing and staying healed, and it's also brought me the additional gifts of more peace, more contentment, more joy and just more space. More space in my life and that's literal, physical space and emotional and mental space too Space that I have then been able to put to good use in supporting my healing and staying healed.
Speaker 1:In defining simplicity and minimalism, I find that it's actually best to define those terms by contrasting them with what they are not, and that is our complex, commercialized, busy modern life. The standard modern life today is pretty chaotic, especially in America, where the culture drives us to spend so much of our time and energy working, grinding, pushing through, busy, busy, busy. Not just so we can up our status. When somebody asks us that all-important question, what do you do? But so that we can buy all the things, the big house and all the stuff to put in the big house, the nice car, luxury vacations, etc. It's a life of excess in every sense of the word. It's a life that is over, full, over budget and yet under fulfilling. So simplicity is the absence, or at least a great reduction, of all of that. It's being mindful and intentional about every aspect of our life. So today we're going to dig into all of this, focusing mostly on taking that intentional look at our physical possessions, and then we'll discuss looking at how we spend our time. Then we'll talk about how we spend our energy and how all of these things can have the power to either greatly harm us and steal our health, or they can have the power to do the opposite, to help to heal us and to keep us healed. So let's start off by looking at simplicity when it comes to our physical stuff, and that's where the term minimalism is used the most in reference to physical stuff.
Speaker 1:I've been a minimalist when it comes to physical stuff for pretty much my whole adult life. I've never been a big fan of extraneous stuff. On a conscious and on a subconscious level, I know that it's always been very enjoyable for me to not have an overabundance of possessions, even before I knew the name for it or could even put it in words. I've enjoyed the peace and the calmness that comes with a clear, clean, open, bright space. So that's really something I've prioritized, especially as I've become more and more aware of all of the many health benefits.
Speaker 1:Now, to be clear, minimalism is not about getting rid of all your possessions and living out of a van or a backpack. It doesn't mean you have to live in a tiny house. It doesn't mean you have to appear fringe or extreme in any way. It's really just about being intentional with what you own. American homes are generally packed with stuff, piles of things, overstuffed drawers and closets, not being able to find something when you need it, not cleaning much because it's too hard to maneuver around all the stuff, and many of us have basements and garages and possibly even outside storage units which we can just fill with stuff, even if it's stuff that we don't really need, don't really use and, for much of it, probably don't even really want. And often we don't think twice about this practice because it seemingly is how everyone else lives and we may not even really consciously be aware of the clutter and the excess or think that we're bothered by it. Yet it's fascinating.
Speaker 1:I've recently seen studies that have concluded that being in spaces that are cluttered and messy actually have a negative effect on the brain, whether we realize it or not. When being in cluttered and messy spaces, the brain can actually release cortisol, the stress hormone, as a reaction to being in a space like that. So that's a big deal, because it tells us that our bodies are seeing the presence of excess and disorder as a threat, seeing the presence of excess and disorder as a threat. So what that tells us is that, as part of the healing journey no-transcript let's not forget the fact that stuff requires maintenance, cleaning, repair. You've probably heard it said best the stuff you own can end up owning.
Speaker 1:You Talk about added stress. One of the key factors in overcoming chronic illness is reducing the stress in our lives as much as we can and, let's face it, in many areas of life, we don't really have a whole lot of control over how much stress is present. So it's important to find the areas where we can control what we can control, and by taking an intentional look at our physical space, our home, the place where we spend the most time, the place that is supposed to be our respite, we can make choices that lead to calm and peace and greater health and wellness, instead of the stress, cortisol and, by default, lesser health and wellness. Okay, so what if you have a house full of stuff right now, or maybe not even full of stuff, but you feel like it's just too much? Maybe there are many things in there that you no longer need, no longer want, many things that are no longer serving you or your family.
Speaker 1:Where to begin? Let's begin with mindfulness. Stand still in each room of your home and just take it all in. Just take a good, hard, honest look at what is in each room, what needs to be there versus what doesn't. What do you use versus what never gets used? What do you love versus what is more of a pain or has maybe even bad memories associated with it? What is practical versus what just gets in the way, really start looking at all of your belongings with fresh eyes. And then I always suggest starting small.
Speaker 1:Pick one drawer or one small closet, take everything out Thoroughly, clean that drawer or the closet. While everything is out of it, then analyze the contents that you've removed. Which of those items do you really need and or really want in that drawer or closet? And then consider what can be donated or given away to someone who will really use it and appreciate it. What can be recycled? What is garbage? Use it and appreciate it. What can be recycled? What is garbage? What should go somewhere else in the house? Ask yourself these questions as you look at each item individually, maybe even pick each item up and hold it in your hands while you consider this. Then remove the contents that you're ready to let go of and put back the contents that you are choosing to keep.
Speaker 1:And if you find that you are still keeping an amount of stuff in that space that prevents you from being able to see what's in there, or maybe it's still hard to get the drawer or the closet closed easily, if it's still too much, then go through that evaluation process again and again after that, if you have to, and try to pare down a little bit more. The goal is to get that drawer or closet clean, beautiful, functional and easily accessible. And once you get it to that point, just bask in that. How good does it feel to have a drawer where, when you open it, you can quickly see what's in it. It's clean, it's fresh, you can open it and close it seamlessly, it feels good, right, no cortisol present there. And that is a simple little microcosm of what it's like to live in a space that is simplified, it's calming, it's peaceful, it's healthy for the mind, body and spirit.
Speaker 1:And please note that I'm not trying to encourage you to get rid of all of your stuff. I certainly have stuff. It's not about how much you can get rid of. It's about being intentional with what you allow in your home. So once you've done that first little project, let that feeling of great accomplishment inspire you to keep going project. Let that feeling of great accomplishment inspire you to keep going drawer by drawer, closet by closet, room by room. If you make the decision to pursue minimalism as part of your healing journey, it's always a good idea to spend time boosting your motivation by regularly reading blog posts or watching videos from trusted sources in this area. Joshua Becker of Becoming Minimalist, which is at becomingminimalistcom, is a great resource for this purpose. He's just fantastic, so definitely check him out on his website and on YouTube. With minimalism, I love to break it down to clean house, clean mind, clear counters, clear vision.
Speaker 1:When our space is simplified, we not only avoid the physiological stress cortisol release but we give ourselves the literal physical space and the mental space to breathe easier. Moving on to the next area of simplicity, now let's look at assessing our schedules, how we spend our time. The stress and burden of excess extends far beyond just physical possessions. Many of us are also burdened by an excess of commitments and obligations, finding ourselves completely overextended. This constant busyness can leave us feeling burned out and, worse, it leaves us with little to no time at all for focusing on the all-important physical, mental, emotional and spiritual health of ourselves and of our families. Our priorities have really gotten way out of whack in so many areas. How did we get here? Well, again, we have to look at our culture, our modern, fast-paced society, which has really evolved to glorify busyness. In fact, it seems like busyness has become a badge of honor and is somehow meant to be impressive. When asking someone how are you, it's not uncommon to get busy as an answer, even when our plates are already overflowing.
Speaker 1:We feel pressured to say yes to every opportunity that comes our way because we don't want to let someone down or we don't want to get taken down a notch in our status. We've got FOMO too. Fomo is real in our status. We've got FOMO too. Fomo is real.
Speaker 1:And parents, oof Parents, are especially expected to be able to do it all and say yes to it all. We're expected to have flawless success at work and at home, to be yes people, to always step up to help, to always be there to support others, to always be able to be relied upon as the person who will get it done. So we're having to relentlessly bust our butts at the office, even on days when maybe our kids are sick. We simply have to just figure it out. We're expected to serve on boards, be active PTA members and Girl Scout troop leaders. We're shuttling our kids back and forth to all of their various sports and activities, which sometimes take up an entire weekend, not to mention weeknights. And we're expected somehow to magically be healthy and fit mentally and physically through all of this.
Speaker 1:But what the reality of living this way looks like is that we are barely hanging on and our health is paying the price. Because of our busyness, we're sacrificing quality family time and ignoring our friends and loved ones, who we simply don't have time for. We miss out on thoughtful conversations and meaningful, true connection. We're sacrificing the ability to have the time to cook healthy, nourishing food for our families. Instead, we're depending on the drive-thru or Uber Eats for dinner. We're sacrificing exercise, we're sacrificing sleep and we're sacrificing all forms of self-care. There's just not enough time, and so, in the name of busyness, we're sacrificing our health, and for what? Doing it all is simply impossible. So the end result is that we feel like we're failing at work and we feel like we're failing at home, and that's a terrible thing, but I truly believe that it doesn't have to be this way.
Speaker 1:So if you realize that your plate is unsustainably full and that it can't go on like this, and you're ready to simplify, where to begin? Well, just like how simplifying your physical stuff doesn't mean you have to throw out everything you own, you also don't need to throw all of your commitments and obligations out the window. Again, it starts with mindfulness that leads to intentionality. Again, it starts with mindfulness that leads to intentionality. Just taking a step back to really look at the way you spend your time is step one. Take out your monthly calendar or look at your Google calendar and write a list of all the things that you have on it, all the commitments, all the obligations, all of the ways that you're spending your time. Then put that list away and focus on serious contemplation.
Speaker 1:Contemplate. What are your values? What is truly meaningful to you? What do you want your life to look like? What do you want to prioritize in your life? What do you want to prioritize in your life? What do you think you will look back on in 10, 20, 50 years and say I'm so glad that I gave my time to that. Once you have determined your true values and priorities, take that list of all the items on the calendar back out and assess it now with fresh eyes. Then determine, according to what you have determined your values and priorities in this moment of time to be, what can stay and what needs to go. This may lead to something as simple as canceling an evening networking event so you can have time to go out to dinner with your partner or spend special one-on-one time with your kid, or it may lead to something way bigger, like quitting your demanding, soul-sucking job in exchange for a career that is more in line with your values and the way that you want to live.
Speaker 1:Now reality check. Of course, saying no or quitting something is not always simple and easy. It can be really hard and it certainly can be uncomfortable Again, because we're hardwired not to let other people down, and change in general is hard. But here's a simple statement that you can make that is really hard to argue against. I can't do this, or I can no longer do this, because I'm prioritizing my mental, emotional and physical health, and that of my family as well. It's going to be a challenge for anyone to object to that statement, but even if they do, you can walk away guilt-free, knowing that you are taking steps to live according to your values. And we don't always need to straight up walk away from things either, by the way. Sometimes we just need to set more boundaries.
Speaker 1:Again, it's all about being intentional with how we spend our time, determining what our values are and making choices to live in alignment with them. Okay, the third part of simplicity that we're going to look at is how we spend our energy. In addition to being intentional about our physical possessions and how we spend our time, simplicity also involves being mindful of how we spend our energy. There's some overlap here, with physical possessions and schedules, for sure, but in really evaluating how we spend our energy, we need to include a few other standout areas. This encompasses things like the people we give our energy to, our use of technology and our thoughts. So, first off, the people we give our energy to.
Speaker 1:Relationships are a tricky thing, because we need them. We want them, of course, and going back to the determining our values and priorities conversation, most of us will undoubtedly have our closest relationships on those lists, but here again, excess can rear its ugly head. In our modern day society, we may feel pressured to maintain countless connections, both online and offline, even if some of these relationships are not truly fulfilling or supportive. You've probably heard it said before that with friendship, we really only need two or three trusted close friends. Certainly, having more than that is a blessing, but when we have too many people in the circle of trust, intimacy can be diluted a bit. And then there's the issue of maintaining relationships that may be unhealthy, meaning they are toxic, one-sided or continually draining.
Speaker 1:Simplifying our relationships means focusing our energy on the people who lift us up. Means focusing our energy on the people who lift us up, inspire us and contribute positively to our lives, and vice versa. It's about prioritizing quality over quantity and being willing to let go of relationships that no longer serve us. A good friend of mine, who is one of the friends in my circle of trust, once gave me this sage advice not everyone is meant to be in your life forever. Many people are only meant to be in your life for a season. That impacted me so profoundly because it helped me look at the concept of my relationships with a much broader lens, and it gave me freedom to let go of a friendship whose time had passed. By being more intentional and selective about the relationships we direct our energy to, we create the space to truly connect with those who are meant to be a meaningful part of our lives.
Speaker 1:Another area to note in regards to how we spend our energy is technology. Technology can, of course, be a wonderful thing. It can also be a major energy drain. Constantly checking our smartphones, scrolling through social media and responding to endless notifications and emails can leave us feeling frazzled, anxious and disconnected from the present moment, all things that are not great for our health or for the healing process. To simplify our relationship with technology, we can set boundaries around our screen time, such as designating tech-free zones and or time periods in our homes or establishing specific times of day to check our devices. There's lots of little tips and tricks. There's even apps you can put on your phone, which is kind of ironic, but apps you can put on your phone that will limit your screen time for you. My family recently started a put our phones away at 6 pm policy for five out of the seven nights a week, and it has been incredible, really truly eye-opening and a wonderful thing for our family. By being more intentional about our technology use, we can reclaim so much energy and we can direct it to what truly matters.
Speaker 1:Lastly, our thoughts and emotions also play a significant role in how we spend our energy, so we're going to take a look at trying to simplify negative thought patterns. Negative thought patterns, such as dwelling on the past, worrying about the future or engaging in self criticism, can be incredibly draining. Abundant anxiety is one of the fallouts from our culture of excess, and anyone who's ever dealt with it knows just how exhausting for the mind, body and spirit it is. Simplifying our emotional life means working to cultivate a more positive and present-focused mindset. This can involve practicing gratitude, letting go of grudges and reframing challenges as opportunities for growth. This is something I've been working on for so long. I like to say I'm a recovering pessimist, but practicing gratitude has helped me significantly in that area to become much more of an optimist, but there's still much room for growth there. Of course, getting help from therapists and other professionals when it comes to dealing with negative thought patterns is a great and often necessary idea. So, again, this is an area where mindfulness is key.
Speaker 1:Consider starting paying attention to the thoughts that run through your mind. That may be something that we don't take the time to even think to do. Maybe even start a journal writing down the thoughts that come into your head, the negative thoughts, the negative self-talk, the glass half empty thoughts. Look for patterns and areas that stand out. From there you can begin to take a more intentional approach to giving less energy to thoughts that hurt and more energy to thoughts that heal. By simplifying our inner world, we free up energy that can be channeled into healing, self-care, pursuing our passions and giving back to others.
Speaker 1:So, in wrapping up, ultimately, simplicity is not just about decluttering our homes or streamlining our schedules. It's a way of life. It's about aligning our actions with our values and creating space for what truly matters. When we embrace simplicity holistically across all areas of our lives, we can experience a profound sense of peace, clarity and purpose. By being more intentional in all of the areas discussed today, we can reduce stress, enhance our resilience, promote our healing and cultivate a life that is truly fulfilling. Remember, simplicity is a marathon, not a sprint. It's about making small and consistent choices that align with our values and support our best selves.
Speaker 1:Thank you so much for listening today. I hope you enjoyed this as much as I enjoyed talking about one of my favorite topics. Thank you so much for listening today. I hope you enjoyed this as much as I enjoyed talking about one of my favorite topics. If you have received value from this episode, I would greatly appreciate it if you would subscribe to the podcast, download the episodes, rate and review and, of course, share it with anyone who you think would find value in it as well. I am honored to walk alongside of you as we seek a simplified life and as we heal and stay healed together.