Ep. 75 I'm Back: Surgery, Infection and a Crash Course in Somatic Recovery

I disappeared for three weeks. What I thought was a minor pulled muscle turned out to be a major medical emergency involving surgery, an at-home IV, and some of the most humbling, humanizing moments of my life.

In this episode, I share the raw story of what happened—and what it taught me about healing, trauma, and the nervous system. We explore how physical injury and medical procedures can leave invisible imprints on the body… and why that matters in our relationships, too.

You'll learn:

• How trauma shows up after surgery or injury
• Why somatic preparation matters before medical events
• The hidden connection between physical healing and attachment
• How to know if you’re carrying unresolved trauma from a past procedure

Whether you've had surgery, cared for someone in recovery, or just needed a reminder that healing is never linear—this episode is for you.

Work with me 1:1

00:00 Introduction and Life Update

01:36 The Unexpected Medical Journey

03:58 Understanding Physical Trauma

05:57 Healing and Relationships

07:18 Somatic and Attachment Therapy

08:34 Recognizing Trauma Signs

11:15 Somatic Preparation for Surgery

13:58 Conclusion and Gratitude

Transcript

Lisa: 0:11

Hey guys. Lisa Dawn here, joining you from my bed. Whew. If you've been tuning in regularly, you might be wondering where I've been for the past three weeks. The short version is I've been healing. The long version, well, where do I even begin? What I thought was a pulled muscle in my butt turned out to be a massive abscess that had to be surgically removed, and that led to a home iv, multiple rounds of antibiotics and a humbling few weeks of not being able to sit. Being cared for by my incredibly patient and kind husband and reckoning with just how tender and dependent healing can be. So today's episode is part life update, part Education on how Physical injuries and surgeries can create trauma imprints. Part relationship reflection, because as someone trained in somatic experiencing and dynamic attachment re-patterning, I've come to see how profoundly physical trauma intersects with our relational lives. So let's get into it. My butt chronicles. So, as I said, I thought I had pulled a glute muscle or something. I had just previously done a pretty difficult leg workout, nothing out of the ordinary. And a few days after I just noticed that I was feeling extra sore in my butt, and then I, it was so tender that I couldn't even sit on it. So turns out it was a giant abscess and I had to go in for emergency surgery, and the healing journey that followed was layered. I was on seven different antibiotics over the course of eight days, and at one point I had an IV at home, a drainage tube coming out of my ass. Yes, I know it's graphic, but real. And was unable to sit or lie on my left side for over three weeks. My husband became part-time nurse, wound care specialist and bathroom assistant. It was vulnerable. It was exhausting. And it reminded me once again, how resilient the body and the heart really are. And yo, here's the wild part. I found out that these types of infections are actually super common. They can start from something as simple as an ingrown hair, a blocked gland, or even a tiny internal tear. The human body Wow, is just, it's truly mysterious in some ways. And what kept me grounded during this experience was, well, many things. The support I had, the self trust, my ability to advocate for my needs. The capacity and regulation I've built through the years with my somatic and relational training, and in our intermediate year, we learned how to help people prepare for and recover from surgeries and medical trauma from the pre-op stage through to healing. Because here's the thing, trauma isn't just about emotional events. The body can hold trauma from physical events too, especially when there's a loss of control, intense pain, or a survival threat. If you've ever had a car accident, a fall, a surgery, or even a dental procedure, that left you feeling off afterward, it could be a stored trauma in your nervous system. And often we don't connect the dots. I mean, sometimes I can barely remember what I had for breakfast yesterday. So linking anxiety or depression back to a procedure from a year ago, it's easy to miss now. This experience reminded me that healing, real healing is relational. It happens in the quiet moments. When my husband sat on the bathroom floor to help me when I let my body rest instead of forcing it, which I'm still doing, which is why I'm currently in bed, was actually trying to put this episode out for a few days now. And what took that, what took place of that was, you know, a three to five hour nap. Or when I felt the support of friends and family and didn't push it away, and it also reminded me of a hard truth. So many people had to go through experiences like this alone during a medical crisis, and that becomes a relational imprint. We learn not to trust, not to need, not to lean on others. If you've ever had. An experience like that, I see you, and I'm sorry you had to go through it alone. It's something we don't talk about enough. When the body experiences trauma through surgery, injury or sudden medical emergencies, it doesn't just impact our physical wellbeing. I. It can affect how we show up in relationships. Why? Because attachment and trauma aren't just psychological concepts. They're physiological experiences. When we experience pain helplessness. Or a loss of control, like under anesthesia or during recovery. Our survival responses kick in, fight, flight, freeze, collapse, and often we carry those states into our relationships. Maybe we shut down when someone tries to support us. Maybe we feel ashamed asking for help or being needy. Perhaps we get overwhelmed by touch or closeness. Maybe we overcompensate to appear strong or independent or avoid vulnerability because it reminds us of powerlessness and we think I have relationship issues when really our body is still trying to protect us from an event that felt really threatening. And this is where somatic experiencing and dynamic attachment re-patterning becomes so powerful in se. We work directly with the nervous system to complete survival responses, restore safety, and rewire our relationship to overwhelm. In Dar, we look at how early attachment wounds and their modern day echoes play out in how we bond, disconnect and protect ourselves in love. And together they offer a way back, back into the body, back into connection, back into relationship. Not from survival, but from choice. When we heal trauma held in the body, whether it's from surgery, an accident, a fall, we make it easier to trust again, let love in, receive care without shame, ask for what we need, regulate with another person because you can't co-regulate if you can't locate yourself. And physical trauma often disconnects us from our own bodies. So how do you know if your body is still holding onto something from a past medical event? Well, here are some clues. So there will be physical signs. So perhaps there's chronic tension in an area long after it's quote unquote healed. Maybe you experience numbness or dissociation. Perhaps there's been shaking, flinching, or freezing with touch. Maybe you have overreactions to medical procedures. Maybe you have wounds or inflammation that just won't go away. So there could be emotional signs. You could be feeling panic or shut down when recalling the event. You could be feeling shame about being weak. Have difficulty receiving help. Maybe you avoid doctors or nurses altogether. Maybe you have flashbacks or anxiety in medical settings, and there could be cognitive patterns. Maybe you say things to yourself like, I can't trust anyone to take care of me. Something bad will happen again, or I'm only safe when I'm in control. And I want you to know if any of this is resonating, you're not alone. So many people are walking around with trauma from physical events that they don't even know are there. So situations like emergency surgeries like the one I had, childbirth, complications, anesthesia, mishaps, and even being disbelieved about pain can leave an imprint. And this is exactly where somatic and attachment therapy can be an incredibly powerful tool to help reestablish safety in the body, gently renegotiate the memory of the event, reconnect with areas that feel numb or painful, release stored, fight, flight, or freeze energy and come back into your wholeness. So if you're nodding along or thinking of someone who might need this, please feel free to share this episode with them. Again, so many people are walking around carrying these invisible weights from physical injuries and just don't even realize it. And I work one-on-one with folks healing from all kinds of trauma, including surgery and accident recovery. So if you do need support on my contact info will be in the show notes. Working with your body somatically before a surgery or a medical procedure can make a huge difference, not just in how the procedure itself goes, but in how fully and peacefully you recover afterward. Here's how and why. So it prepares your nervous system for the boundary rupture. Surgery is a massive boundary rupture. You're being anesthetized cut open and temporarily losing control over your body, all of which the nervous system can perceive as a threat. Even if the procedure is necessary and planned. So, somatic preparation helps your system recognize the event as safe and temporary rather than as an overwhelming violation. It helps you stay more regulated during the procedure. Even under anesthesia, your nervous system is active. If you go into a procedure with high levels of stress, fear. Or disconnection. Your body may store that as trauma. Even if you're unconscious during the event, it reduces risk of post-surgical PTSD or trauma imprints. Many people don't realize that trauma can come from medical experiences, especially when there's pain, panic or helplessness, lack of consent or explanation, anesthesia awareness, medical gaslighting, or neglect. So somatic preparation increases your system's capacity to metabolize and integrate the experience so if it doesn't get stored, so it doesn't get stored as stuck survival energy, and it improves healing time. A regulated nervous system is more efficient at healing when your body isn't in a constant stress state, which diverts energy away from digestion, repair, and immune response wounds close faster, inflammation is reduced, and rest is more restorative and strengthens your sense of agency and coherence. Medical procedures often leave people feeling passive or powerless. But when you go in with a somatic roadmap, you remember, this is something, this is happening with me, not just to me. I can stay connected to myself even in vulnerable moments. I. I have choice even in how I breathe or orient. And this embodied agency helps reduce overwhelm and builds trust in your body and in the care process. Ah. Thanks for tuning in today. I know that this one is, is quite short, but I just wanted to take a moment to thank everyone who showed up for me during this time. The hospital staff, my family, my incredible husband, my friends who checked in and reminded me I wasn't alone. And I also want to thank you for being here. And listening. Whether you've been with me since episode one or you just landed here today, we will be back next Wednesday with a full episode for you. Until then, may you feel safe in your body, loved in your process, and supported in your healing, whatever form it's taking. With so much gratitude and love. As always, thank you so much for listening. Life is busy, so it means even more that you're carving out time in your day to be here. Listen, we've got so many great episodes coming up, so please make sure you subscribe to follow along on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. And for those of you who like to watch your podcasts, we are now uploading them to YouTube. And if you appreciate these episodes, please do us a favor and leave a rating or a review and share it with anyone you think could benefit. See you again next Wednesday.