The Midlife Marriage

Episode 57: Your Nervous System Determines How You Experience Love in Your Marriage, Not Your Mind

• Carrie Cohen

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You love your husband. You know he’s a good man. But no matter how much effort you put in—communicating more, reading relationship books, trying to be more affectionate—you still feel disconnected.

The problem isn’t communication. It’s your nervous system.

In this episode, I break down The Nervous System Marriage Map™, a three-stage process that explains why your body may be stuck in survival mode and how to shift into a relationship that actually feels like home again.

What You’ll Learn in This Episode:

  • Why your nervous system—not your mindset—determines how you experience love.
  • The three stages of The Nervous System Marriage Map™ and how to identify where you are:
    • Survival Mode – Feeling triggered, distant, or emotionally shut down.
    • Regulation Mode – Beginning to feel safe but still navigating old patterns.
    • Connection Mode – Finally feeling at ease in your marriage, where love flows naturally.
  • Why traditional relationship advice like “just communicate more” doesn’t work if your nervous system still feels unsafe in love.
  • How to rewire your nervous system so your marriage can thrive—without forcing connection.

Your marriage isn’t broken. Your nervous system is simply protecting you in ways that no longer serve you. And when you learn how to shift your nervous system, your entire relationship changes.

Listen in to discover how to stop pushing love away and finally create the marriage you deserve.


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