The Love Boat Project
The ambitious and nonsensical voyage to watching and discussing every Love Boat episode ever. Sets sail every other Monday.
The Love Boat Project
LBP #75: Jump In The Limes
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The penultimate episode of the season brings us Hasselhoff, hockey and hardly anything happened.
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Welcome back. Love Boat Project Episode 75. The platinum aniverse? I don't even know what 75 is. It's metal, I assume. Just metal? Like it goes from silver to gold to metal?
SPEAKER_01What's silver?
SPEAKER_04Silver's 25. Gold's 50.
SPEAKER_01What's a hundred?
SPEAKER_04Diamond? If you're married for a hundred years. I mean, if you're married for 75, we got it. It feels like it, right? Am I right, ladies? I'm Mike Dell. I'm Mike Robinson Long Mike Down. Shook up. Well, this is good because I didn't really have a question for you. I guess my main question is, Mike, when will we reach the deepest part of the ocean?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, I'm feeling maybe that's where they that's where they sank Anne B. Davis's the rest of her lines for this episode. Jeez.
SPEAKER_04Trying to tie that into um and be not used that much.
SPEAKER_01She was in this episode.
SPEAKER_04Doesn't it seem doesn't it seem like seriously? Like to the point where I didn't do like the this character is this person before I watch it the first time. Right. And I just assumed she was somebody else because why would she not have any lines? I just assumed she was the lady looking to do the old I thought she was gonna be the lady to looking to jump over the rail. That made more sense to me.
SPEAKER_01We've seen people who have had the same amount of lines as her being easy currency. Easy currency.
SPEAKER_04Oh, for sure. Absolutely. Like so maybe the least lines of a portal person since Joyce Brothers.
SPEAKER_01Oh, that's a good one.
SPEAKER_04That's right. Like it was crazy. She had more consec she had more sentences, that's for sure.
SPEAKER_01I we I wish I would have timed it. She was on screen for tick, tick, tick, tick, tick. That was yeah, I don't know.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, well, we will we will get to these burning issues along with others on tonight's episode, which is this a season three, episode 24, 27 on your IMDBs, God knows where it is on Paramount. Invisible Maniac September song and peekaboo. The synopsis. Hey, it's an Isaac episode. Sort of. Isaac finds that his former schoolfriend is trying to use him to make her husband jealous. Kathy's concerns. Kathy's concerns are getting in the way of her committing to Tom. And in a very vague line, Faye Pier Piermont wants to liven up her marriage, which is like that's wonderful. Okay. You know, we can talk about it when we get into the actual storyline, but right and we'll talk about how they actually played the notes on that particular thing. But man, sure, in the late 70s, early 80s, just killing yourself was hilarious.
SPEAKER_01Well, it's funny because it was even like a potential suicide was like, well, let's be concerned, but we'll just keep an eye on things.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, let's be concerned, and we'll have Julie and the 12-year-old check it out.
SPEAKER_01So it was treated like drunk driving in the late 70s or of 1980, apparently. Like it's no big deal.
SPEAKER_04Like every I mean, I guess we saw they still never really dealt with uh Julie's friend with a scar on her face trying to kill herself. They never dealt with that. That was real suicide attempts. Yeah. Stubby winner. Karen Williamson. Shout out Karen Williamson. The original air date of this baby was Saturday, April 19th, 1980. Mike, last week was yet another rerun as we are in a very, very weird spring for Saturday night television.
SPEAKER_01Was it May sweeps? Or how does that work, Mike? What is it?
SPEAKER_04Well, it's it's so yeah, the sweeps and current, well, I don't even know if there still are sweeps, right? You know, the way TV works now, but it was always February, May, and November were the sweeps ratings periods. And so you'd have your your big ones there, and May would obviously be where you'd see finale your season finales and stuff. This is the second to last episode of the sea. This is the second to last episode of the season, so we're gonna have one episode in May. Now, we kind of talked about it, and we'll probably talk about a little bit more next week or in the opener. Is this this TV acting strike that happens in the summer, which kind of pushes everything back? I do wonder how much it's impacted things because it's not just these weird love boats where they're new, rerun, new, rerun, new rerun. It's also like chips is off the schedule. We're running DJ and the Bear reruns. Like it's just, I don't know if they're trying to push stuff further back because they're not gonna have actors or you know maybe that's what it is.
SPEAKER_01They're trying to just stagger it. If you only have X amount, you don't you know what I mean? Just stagger them out and hopefully you don't run out of episodes before they come back.
SPEAKER_04Well, and I also wonder because we did talk about it when we talked about the ratings for this year, is if you think about last season, season two for us, yeah, ABC dominates. Yeah. This year, CBS dominates. And I do wonder if ABC is like panicking a little bit, and NBC's just been bad for so long that they're just trying everything. Like it's funny for us, CBS seems like they're terrible because we go through the the prism of Saturday night, but they're doing great everywhere else.
SPEAKER_01So I would love to know what what that CBS night is. I would imagine you get the 60 minutes. But I mean their Saturday night lineup historically, or at least for the last two and almost three seasons, has just been well.
SPEAKER_04What was uh this season?
SPEAKER_01It's been really bad.
SPEAKER_04What night was Dallas on? Because I feel like that's really been the okay, which is weird. It's a hazard on a Friday night. Okay, you know, so maybe they're changing it a little bit too. But yeah, it's and Saturdays. I will be very curious to see because I I was looking at something I think for the credits or what's going something that we're about to talk about. Right. And it looks like the love boat runs on Saturday night the whole time. I couldn't like that.
SPEAKER_01I I wouldn't want it, like it doesn't belong on a Wednesday night.
SPEAKER_04It's it's I agree, but I guess I'm surprised. Yeah, I am so I do think I do think that probably means that the ratings stay at a level throughout the whole way, but I do wonder if we've seen the high watermark for them.
SPEAKER_01Well, maybe we've seen the high watermark for Saturday night TV viewing. You know, I mean, nowadays if you look at TV, you know, I wonder at what point did that you know Saturday night TV viewership sort of taper off.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, because these are still, I mean, these these are shows we've heard of, right? Chips and Love Boat and Fancy Island, you know.
SPEAKER_01Big shows.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, it's inter it's interesting, and I guess I'll be curious because now they're the second highest rated show on Saturday, but they still win their time slot, right? So will it be them and chips for a while going back and forth? Will they ever lose the time slot? Because that would be the real that would probably be the real kick in the in the stoopings, right? So ten or or eight. Eight would be the oh god. Or there's just eight. It's the least the least sexy episodes. It's eight o'clock. Yeah, we need like midnight. Let's get some midnight episodes out there. We have talked about the reruns already. The last week's episode was the one of our favorites and one of our least favorites. That's right, Mike. Mr. Barrett, Nancy McKeon, the Olympians were on last week, along with Damon Wilson. Oh, that's a great letter of baby cakes. And so you're like, oh my god, that's one of the best episodes we've seen this season. But the third storyline was The Brotherhood of the Sea. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Which I found as I was actually going through that episode for stubby purposes, so it was very easy to drop it into certain categories.
SPEAKER_01I almost just blanked it out. I don't, I was just I was going through that episode we were talking before. I think I blanked that whole storyline out. Like I didn't even read it back on the transcript. Just nope.
SPEAKER_04Yeah. It was definitely a nothing burger, which you know happens. Thank God for Damon Wilson. Jeez.
SPEAKER_01He saved big time. He doesn't even know what a superhero he is. Yeah.
SPEAKER_04That's true. He might know in a few weeks, in a scant month. All right. What else is on? CBS. Tim Conway. Kind of established now at eight o'clock. This week's guest star. You want to take any guesses? Who would be a guest star on a Tim Conway show in 1980?
SPEAKER_01Oh, 1980. Maybe Carol Burnett, maybe Carol Channing.
SPEAKER_04That's close enough. Barbara Mandrell. Barbara Mandrell. I remember the Mandrell sisters. Yeah. Absolutely.
SPEAKER_01They were here.
SPEAKER_04More importantly, at nine, and we have talked about this show in the past. I believe we talked about it when it was on last season. From nine to eleven, it is. Celebrity challenge of the sex is five.
SPEAKER_01Celebrity. Wait a minute, wait a minute. So it's not just celebrities, it's a competition amongst the gender.
SPEAKER_04Men versus women, yep. So this appears to be after Battle of the Network stars, but it's the same concept, except as many women.
SPEAKER_01I thought they did like the uh the circus of the stars.
SPEAKER_04I thought they well, I think that's where this eventually led to, yeah. So last year, if you remember, the coaches were Phyllis George and Dr. William H. Cosby. He was not asked back, I guess, this year.
SPEAKER_01Where's Christopher when you need him? Come on.
SPEAKER_04The coaches this year, Robert Conrad and Victoria Principal. Okay. So as we talked about Dallas. Robert Conrad was in something that I have I don't think I ever ended up bringing up on the show, but it was on early in the season this year on Saturdays. A man named Sloane. I I don't know about this. Yeah. My guess is he was in something before that, like previous to this time, but hell if I know what it was. Yeah, I know the name, yeah. But I think I know the name from him being really good at Battle of the Network Stars. Which is weird.
SPEAKER_01Who knows?
SPEAKER_04More importantly, Mike, yeah, I have the list of everyone who competed in Celebrity Challenge of the Sexus V.
SPEAKER_01Excellent.
SPEAKER_04That also has been on a love boat so far. Perfect. And I have their event. So I'm gonna give you the actor or celebrity, as it were, and you can just take a shot.
SPEAKER_01These are these are cast members or guests or both?
SPEAKER_04Uh looks like just guests. So now the quote unquote the quote unquote sports are various degrees of real, but I will let you have a guess. Kathy Lee Crosby. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. What sport does she play?
SPEAKER_01What sport does she play?
SPEAKER_04Does she play?
SPEAKER_01Well, they wouldn't let her do the sport. She didn't, she could be like gymnastics. She liked football throwing.
SPEAKER_04I don't know what kind of doubles tennis, which is the sport that she was a pro at, which doesn't seem fair.
SPEAKER_01What well give me the events. What events are there?
SPEAKER_04That's what I'm saying.
SPEAKER_01Oh, you want all the events? Yeah, well, that way, like I kind of know where to put the people because then it's if if you say just the people, I mean I it could be, you know, horseshoe. Yeah, I know.
SPEAKER_04All right, all right. Okay, fair enough. Okay, so let's just wrap this up. So her opponent in that one for tennis doubles was Pat Harrington Schneider himself. He was cleaning up the posts that hold the nets up.
SPEAKER_00So he's a fixed.
SPEAKER_04I'm not in it for money. I'm in it for love. Let me just point out as we get to the stubbies and we are dying for part-time crew members that Schneider finished second last year. He would have won this thing ten times over already.
SPEAKER_01But he's bare with part-time crew members this season. All right, absolutely.
SPEAKER_04We have one, two, three, four, five, six more guest stars that we're gonna ask about, and here are the sports.
SPEAKER_01Wait, let me ask how long was this show on for an hour or how two hours. Wow, they packed a lot in two hours. Okay.
SPEAKER_04All right, are you gonna remember these?
SPEAKER_01Maybe. We'll see.
SPEAKER_04Alright, the six sports that you can guess from are ping pong, ping pong, roller skating, dune buggy, kayaking, swimming, and cross country. The six guest stars are Jamie Farr.
SPEAKER_01Okay, hold up. Jamie Farr. Dune buggy, go ahead. Incorrect.
SPEAKER_04Scott Bao.
SPEAKER_01Scott Bao swimming.
SPEAKER_04Incorrect. Although we did see him swim, didn't we, in the show? Vic Tabek.
SPEAKER_01He's not kayaking. I'm gonna say roller skating, Mike. Please let me be right.
SPEAKER_04Incorrect. Melissa Gilbert, stubby winner. Melissa Gilbert. Swimming. Incorrect. The Hudson Brothers, some of your favorites.
SPEAKER_01The Hudson Brothers. Are those the ones on the mopeds that weighed more than any other twins? Is that them?
SPEAKER_04No, the Hudson Brothers were those three guys that were in this year's episode that you hated. They kept jumping in each other's bed and stuff.
SPEAKER_01Those guys, I say cross-country. You set them off in the woods, and it's just comedy. Yes?
SPEAKER_04Incorrect. Incorrect. And your final incorrect guess, Joan Van Ark.
SPEAKER_01Joan Van Ark. We know she was a runner. We talked about that. She ran 14 marathons. So it won't be running. I'd say with her, it's going to be swimming.
SPEAKER_04You went over six. That's almost a I'm impressed you remembered all the events. I will say that. Joan Van Arc. Joan Van Arc, cross country. You should have trusted your instincts. That's not fair. She's a marathon runner. The Hudson Brothers swimming. Melissa Gilbert, only because I guess skateboarding wasn't in the event. Kayaking. You should have gotten this one. Vic Taback, Dune Buggy. Yeah, because he's got a big thing. Scott Mayo, roller skating.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_04And Jamie Farr got ping pong.
SPEAKER_01Ping pong. Yeah. Well. There you go. How would have watched that? How would I watch that? Sure.
SPEAKER_04On MBC. Honestly, there's I think I would have. I didn't hate this Lulboat episode. I think I would have watched everything else when I was on tonight, though.
SPEAKER_01I think so too. Again, didn't hate it, but yeah, I'm with you. Just the entertainment value. I think I would have gotten more at it. From Vic Taback and his Dune buggying.
SPEAKER_04Hey dingy. From he should have kayaked and yelled it to dingy. That would have been great.
SPEAKER_01And he could have gotten him an award for, you know, second second appearance of the season. Could have used another one of those too there for Vic.
SPEAKER_04If that counted, we'd be doing a lot more bonus episodes in the next couple weeks. Alright. From eight to ten on NBC, it's BJ and the Bear. And this is how it's listed in the thing. BJ and the Bear slash. What? So Lobo got a spin-off called The Misadventures of Sheriff Lobo. He only appeared in like six episodes of BJ and the Bear. So I don't know if they knew it was going to be a spinoff. Well, that's why though, because he had to go get spun off, I guess. Or misadventure.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, but it's weird when you have a show stapled to another one like that. Like you're not even let that's not a very confident move for a new show.
SPEAKER_04Well, my guess, well, this isn't new. This has been on. So yeah. Basically, it seems like Lobo got two seasons and BJ got three. It's it's it's interesting.
SPEAKER_01We have a franchise here. We have a mythology.
SPEAKER_04Maybe. Now, just a little peek behind the curtain for you listeners. We are trying very hard to find a BJ and the Bear episode that we can watch. It is impossible to find BJ and the Bear. I do not know why. If we do find it, this might be one of them. Run for the money. Okay, now stick with me on this one because a lot of realism.
SPEAKER_01No, thank God it's not the Lady Trucker. Frozen turkey, it's nothing like that.
SPEAKER_04When BJ is arrested for the robbery of a Las Vegas casino. Whoa. Real Oceans 11 shit. Lobo, who is hoping to win Lawman of the Year, sets out to find the stolen money.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, but they already got the stolen money. Why would Lobo give two shits, you know?
SPEAKER_04Why having seen the beginning of Oceans 11 when they're trying to explain how it's impossible to rob a Las Vegas casino, and you're gonna tell me that BJ is just gonna knock it over and then run off with his monkey and his giant truck?
SPEAKER_01Yeah. Yeah, and it's funny because tractor trailers aren't known for their like takeoff skill, you know, takeoff sort of quick exit.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_01The other thing is I would love to know, I would say there was a number associated. Like what do you steal $300? Like, well, how much $11 billion. Well, he did have that whole truck full of remember money when he was hauling treasury notes.
SPEAKER_04So it's oceans too, BJ and the bear.
SPEAKER_01It is weird. I wonder what the reason is. I mean, I can find I you know anything. Steelhawk. What? Street Hawk? Find that in a in a in a jiffy, but it's not as easy to find either.
SPEAKER_04I didn't look. But we can find it if we don't want to speak English and watch it. There's a there's a language, I'm not quite sure what it is that we can watch Street Hawk on YouTube. So sweet.
SPEAKER_01Sweet. My guess it's it's it is weird though, because it's like it is weird that we can't somehow just find it's a weird thing why it's not on Amazon or whatever.
SPEAKER_04Another thing that would make another thing that would make this a interesting one for us would be the guest stars. Can cheetah Ferrell, one of our favorites.
SPEAKER_00Sure, we'd love that.
SPEAKER_04And and a potential stubby nominee for this season, Slim Hickens. Oh, okay. Okay. So if anybody knows, if you know how to contact VJ and the Bear.
SPEAKER_01Is it maybe is it is that the is this the second season of BJ and the Bear that we're dealing with right now?
SPEAKER_04Yes. Yeah. Yeah. And then next year, one more gets it's gone, and we won't talk about it anymore because it's moving to Tuesdays or something. So interesting. So I would imagine our last episode of the season will be the last time we talk about BJ in this context. So if it's off. Which is a shame. Maybe he was maybe he was put to death for the robbery of the Las Vegas casino.
SPEAKER_01So and that's it. Next year it's just the bear. The bear and lobo.
SPEAKER_04The bear and the misadventures of Lobo. We talked about how weird this season has been. Tonight on ABC before the boat is a good indication. Eight o'clock. It's our old friend Angie, which I believe, I believe finished in the top five last season. It is running out the string of its 38-episode run. The last two episodes were actually burned off in July and August, which is the ultimate insult. If you don't remember Angie, that is the show where the Philadelphia diner waitress falls in love with a customer who turns out to be a billionaire, and they buy the diner, starring Donna Peskow, who was the Moon Expert's fiance last season, and the great Robert Hayes.
SPEAKER_01You've seen this show.
SPEAKER_04I've seen like A episode primarily because it took place in Philadelphia, and I went back and checked it out. But like it was, I mean, 38 episodes is basically two seasons. Like it's absolutely absolutely and this is we are clearly in the ABC burning through sitcoms because we talked about the ropers getting stuck, yeah, axed, and yeah. I mean, these are shows that were once they got moved on their own, clearly didn't work out.
SPEAKER_01They weren't afraid to shuffle these shows around back then either. No, this didn't work. They were like, see, uh, too much money at stake.
SPEAKER_04We have seen a lot. We have seen I feel like this probably isn't true, but I feel like we've seen a lot more shuffle on ABC in that eight o'clock slot than we did the previous two seasons. Like NBC hasn't moved. NBC hasn't moved at all. It's really been Chips and BJ all year.
SPEAKER_01So remember Heart to Heart was a Wolf Member Fantasy Island, the last one. Yeah, still know what that was about.
SPEAKER_04It was so weird, and it wasn't a seat like I wanted to bring up because this will be our either this week or next week will be our last opportunity to talk about a show I don't know that I've ever heard of. 830 on ABC, The Good Time Girls.
SPEAKER_01The Good Time Girls.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, and for a show in early 1980, I thought it was going to be one thing. And then you read the synopsis, and it's about four young women who are sharing an apartment in Washington, DC during World War Two.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, like what? Why would you move why wouldn't you move?
unknownWhy?
SPEAKER_04They're not gonna bomb Washington, DC. I mean Yeah, I would have moved mid to the Midwest, I agree.
SPEAKER_01This was the sixth.
SPEAKER_04This was the sixth of 13 episodes. The final six were also burned off in the summer. So again, ABC just burning through the catalog. I had never heard of this show, but you certainly have heard of some of the stars, Mike. Annie Potts, our good friend Annie Potts, yeah, who I will say this has had enough stuff come up this year that I'm kind of confident we're gonna see her on the boat here in the next couple years.
SPEAKER_01So I enjoy Annie Potts. She's great.
SPEAKER_04What and as someone as someone with a child who loves Toy Story, Annie Potts very prevalent to this day. So what's her name? George Engel, who of course married Tyler Moore, and we saw her last season as the daughter of Stubing's friend who got hit on by the nerd with the book, right? So how to pick up women book. So that might have been two seasons ago. Not even sure now.
unknownIt's blurry.
SPEAKER_04And the third star was Lorna Patterson. Why do I know that name? Lorna Patterson, like, why do you know that name? And that was the same thought I had, and then I realized exactly why I know that name. Lorna Patterson was the second stewardess in Airplane, not Julie Haggerty. She's the blonde. Okay. She also went on to star in as the titular Private Benjamin in the TV series. I remember it on CBS. Yeah. Yep. And and I would dare say, as I as I thought about this, maybe my first crush.
SPEAKER_00Really?
SPEAKER_04I think Private Benjamin was like on reruns a lot when I was a kid or whatever, but I just always had a thing for Lorna Patterson, and I don't know that I ever saw her in anything after Private Benjamin.
SPEAKER_00So good for you.
SPEAKER_04Yeah. I was surprised when I thought about that. I just hadn't thought about it in a very long time.
SPEAKER_01Interesting.
SPEAKER_04I was uh for it's interesting, but it's not the most interesting Lorna Patterson. It's not the most interesting Lorna Patterson fact, Mike. Oh, let's go. All right. She has been married since 1990 to a former Love Boat guest star. I believe a stubby nominee. Oh well. And someone who you will know before I even finish his name. Any guesses?
SPEAKER_01What season?
SPEAKER_04Last season. Season two.
SPEAKER_01I mean shit. It could be anybody.
SPEAKER_04I don't think I even have to say a word. I can just say, oh, ooh.
SPEAKER_03Disco Joey. Disco Joey. Michael Lembek.
SPEAKER_01Like, wait, is he doing Disco Joey?
SPEAKER_00Disco Joey.
SPEAKER_01Good for him. Yeah. So very exciting. Good for them.
SPEAKER_04Power couple. I had to double check to make sure that was, in fact, Disco Joey, and it is. As it says in all caps when I found it.
SPEAKER_01So all the best to the new happy couple.
SPEAKER_04Alright, let's get the credits for this episode. Faye Piermont is played by Peggy Cass. This is her only boat. In fact, everyone on the show tonight is in their first low boat episode. Which, considering we are almost through three seasons, that's actually pretty surprising. So, you know.
SPEAKER_00Take it from what it is, yeah.
SPEAKER_04But last week we had all first timers, I believe, for the most part, and no names, right? So no names. Yep. We had more names this week, that's for sure.
SPEAKER_01Or at least people I knew. I mean, but then, you know, this was probably a pretty tame. You know what I mean? In comparison. Well, that's why Ann B. Davis, I don't know how she got the snub. I mean, can considering the cast this week.
SPEAKER_04Like, what Anne barely used Davis.
unknownNo kidding.
SPEAKER_04I would like to say IMDB, horrendous job with this. They cut and pasted all of the cast into a season four episode as well. So when you would like look at somebody and it would say two episodes, and I would click on it, and it would just be clearly not them.
SPEAKER_01So we need a love bodipedia. That's what we need.
SPEAKER_04Well, your boy, your boy, the attorney from last week that you thought was gonna be on. I don't think he showed up here either.
SPEAKER_01I see Byron Morrow listed as a character named Mr. Burroughs.
SPEAKER_04Did you see him Mr. Burroughs?
SPEAKER_01But I don't know who that character was.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, so bad job IMDB.
SPEAKER_01Mm-mm. Yeah.
SPEAKER_04Peggy Cass is best known for her Oscar nominated supporting role as Agnes in 1958's Aunt Mammy or Auntie Mame. Anti Mame, sorry, which also starred Honest X for Tucker. I do love the fact that we just basically have six degrees of Kevin Bacon now with all these, so that's funny. Colonel Tom Parker himself.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_04Ambi Davis, we've been talking about she plays Agnes. She is making her only love boat appearance, and that is barely 106.
SPEAKER_01When they were done, she just walked away. She was like, thanks, but no thanks. Ugh.
SPEAKER_04117 episodes of the Brady Bunch. Plus, according to IMDB trivia, which, you know, I didn't go through and check all these, but I assume it's true. She and our good friend Florence Henderson are the only people to appear in all the Brady offshoots. What are all the Brady offshoots, Mike?
SPEAKER_01Glad you answered. I know a few. I know a few.
SPEAKER_04Alright, there are one, two, three, four, five, five? One, two, three, four, five.
SPEAKER_01Oh, wow. That's w that's two more than I three more than I thought. Okay. I know one of the Brady Brides. That's the only one I've saved by name. Yeah.
SPEAKER_04Okay. We also have the Brady Bunch of Variety Hour.
SPEAKER_01Right. Okay.
SPEAKER_04We have the Brady Girls Get Married, which was a TV movie which led to the Brady Brides. I remember that. I remember that TV movie. We have a very Brady Christmas.
SPEAKER_00Yep.
SPEAKER_04And then we have the Brady's, which I believe you brought up a couple years ago, which was that serious Brady's remember?
SPEAKER_01Trying to teach you lessons.
SPEAKER_04It was uh Robert Robert Reeves, like, ah good.
SPEAKER_01Well, and then they had that special one of really, really serious. It was it was the Brady bunch, but it was about James Brady. And it shows you just how dangerous.
SPEAKER_04God, Clifton Davis as Mr. Reeves. Never a first name, right? Never gave him a first name.
SPEAKER_01No, no first name.
SPEAKER_04Weird. Weird. Only boat. Seriously. Only boat. That's very surprising. He appeared in Davis, by the way. I love Clifford. I agree. So he appeared in 110 episodes of Amen with Sherman Hemsley, which was again set in Philadelphia. So that was like a big deal, you know. And I remember it was on Saturday night. And speaking of Saturday night TV blocks, 227, Amen, Golden Girls, Empty Nest. Every Saturday. Like that's what it was. Gold. Yep. Yeah. So good stuff there. The big thing, and this if this was probably stunt casting in some way, he starred as Clifton in That's My Mama, which was a show about the experiences of a Washington, D.C. barber. I saw this, yeah. And of course, his co-star in that? A young Ted Lang. With no mustache. A mustache. No mustache. Ted Lang. Yeah. So that was fun. And they had they had a couple fun scenes together. Like you could clearly tell. I mean, I was gonna say you can clearly tell they had chemistry, but Ted Lang has chemistry with everybody.
SPEAKER_01So Ted Lang's just the best. Yeah, he really is. It's nice to see him get one. Maybe not in a as dramatic role, but he had he got some he got some uh some some screen time this week.
SPEAKER_04Barely under the wire. Yeah, yeah. Shelly Fabrez as Kathy, no last name. This is first of three votes for her. She'll be back in season six and eight. The uh the season eight episode, Mike, she plays a newly elected mayor who goes on the cruise ship with her campaign manager, who is played by Buddy Stanfield. So season eight, after Julie, we gotta watch a Buddy Stanfield episode. No, thank you.
SPEAKER_01That's not cool.
SPEAKER_04You know what's funny? You know how you always say that you can't like you think don't think of Stooping as an actor, you think of Stooping as a person?
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_04That's how I think of Buddy Stanfield. Like, I never actually write David Heridon or whatever his name is.
SPEAKER_01So yeah, no, I kind of there's so many characters that are the same way with me. Like Vincent Price is never.
SPEAKER_04Shelley Fabrez, of course, played Hayden Fox's longtime girlfriend/slash wife on coach Christine Armstrong in 199 episodes.
unknownWhat a great show that was.
SPEAKER_04Coach was great, although I do think it ran out of gas at the end, if I remember correctly. But the I will say this Craig T. Nelson, who probably not probably not getting him, probably too big. An exasperated Hayden Fox was one of the great television characters of all time. He would just have some random rant about nothing in the middle, like just great hairs flying.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, that that that was good. Yeah, it was good until it it got to be two Screaming Eagles. Remember, he left and then he took a bigger college job, and I think that's sort of when like the show got big, and then he was moving to a bigger university.
SPEAKER_04No, he went to the pros. Oh, that's when it went down. That's even worse. He went to the pros. Yeah, that's way worse. Yeah, and then Mona came in as the team owner. It was it was not good. So I remember that. Oh wow. I did not know this that go ahead. I did not know this that Shelly Fabriz appeared in like a bunch, like 38 episodes of One Day at a Time, which I did not know. So I went digging a little bit. Turns out she was the office rival and eventual business partner of Bonnie Franklin. So she is Team Stacy.
SPEAKER_01Wow. She is Team Stacy. Good call.
SPEAKER_04Alright, the big thing with this episode. It's the Hoff. David Hasselhoff is here as Tom Bell. I mean, just maybe not since Richard Mulligan. I don't want to say Krane. Has somebody just come on the screen at a thousand miles an hour?
SPEAKER_01There's no there's no half stepping with early hoff. I mean, it was a lot. I think in a good way. Maybe it was his character. He was just in character because the way he was so aggressive. It was a lot of him. He's a good person, too. Yeah.
SPEAKER_04Oh, she's small too, I think. But just he carried himself like a guy who was on a sitcom or was on a soap opera and realized that this was a chance to get off the soap opera.
SPEAKER_01A hundred percent. He was like, I'll pop my shirt off, no problem. Like, look at my range.
SPEAKER_04This is one of only two boats, so we will not see Michael Knight back on here because the Hoff is back next season. Mike, I don't even think I can give you any hints into the episode that he's on next season. Pick a number between one and five, and I will give you the five. The pointer sisters.
SPEAKER_01That's all you're getting. That's all you're getting. Oh, jeez. Okay. How about that episode? Okay. Uh-huh.
SPEAKER_04Uh Hoff played Dr. William Snappy Forest on Young and the Restless. Knight Rider for 87 episodes. Baywatch for 219. Baywatch Nights for 45. Jeez. Gordon Jump. It's Bill Piermont. Oh, I forgot to wear my WKRP shirt. Second WKRP or we've seen Lonnie Anderson twice. And we're going to see a lot of Mr. Jump. This is the first of six boats.
SPEAKER_01That's fantastic. He's great. He's so good.
SPEAKER_04You forget. You forget, right? And it took him a while to get warmed up in this episode. But once he started, it was like, oh yep, that's Gordon Jump. Just doing Gordon Jump stuff. Nails it. Yeah. He will be back for six, seven, eight, nine, and the series finale where he plays a mater D. A mater D. Oh, really? Yeah. So there you go. He also was one of the few WKR people that was on the reboot. Yeah, in the early 90s, which somehow lasted 47 episodes, but they just wanted the old one. That's what that was. Yeah, that's true. But I will say this when I moved to Cincinnati, the first thing I did was go to that statue that's on the opening of the credits. So here is a fun fact for us. Yeah. He was in Growing Pains, which we were just talking about last week, where he played Joanna Kearns' father. I did not remember that at all. Me either. So there you go. It all ties in.
SPEAKER_01Interesting.
SPEAKER_04Bernadette Stannis plays Janet Reeves. This is her only boat. She appeared in 133 episodes of Good Times as Thelma Evans. So this is her. This is our second Good Times?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, JJ. Yeah, I don't think we're getting uh oh wait.
SPEAKER_04Whatchamacallit? The lady who was in with the neighbor? No, the divorced couple. It was the one with Clevon Little where the kid was trying to get them back together, but they were like, no, we don't get along. Yeah. Wasn't she from Good Times? I thought she was like the neighbor.
SPEAKER_01And maybe it was the woman who played Valona or Thelona.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, yeah. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01I think I think this is our third Good Times. So I think that too. Unless you get the guy that played Michael, who I couldn't even do.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, you could get the kids later. I mean, honestly, it seems ridiculous because of who she turned out to be. We could get Janet Jackson. I wouldn't be stunned if we got like 1983 Janet Jackson.
SPEAKER_01No, I don't think it would be uh I mean she's already on network television.
SPEAKER_04Right, exactly.
SPEAKER_01Like a lot. Right. It would be so interesting. That would be interesting to see if that happened.
SPEAKER_04Okay, and then Jane Withers, who plays Gladys, who was the sidekick for AB Davis. This is her only boat. She was a child actress in the 30s, kind of in the vein of a Shirley Temple. It sounds like Shirley Temple had all that success, and then every studio just grabbed a bunch of little kids and tried to make them Shirley Temple.
SPEAKER_01Looking for the next one. Yeah. Yeah. You know what's funniest is I wish that Jane Withers and Ann B. Davis in this episode were like the two women that were in the first season. No, the the the second season, the the you know, the phantom. Oh, Nancy Culp. Yeah, like those. I think they were trying to do that thing again. I mean, obviously different director, different episode, but they it just didn't.
SPEAKER_04See, I think they were trying. I thought they were trying to go for that season one where Urick was on and they kept hitting him with the purse. Oh, yeah, that's true. But either way, it did not match up. So I just don't think it was needed. Like if you're gonna have it. Yeah, it just didn't, it just didn't hit. Which is funny. They've had a showed up. You're like, well, they're you know what's funny? They've missed on their runners this year. Because remember the Don Knotts episode where there was that solo woman? Like they just they haven't hit the runners this year. I wonder if whoever was in charge of the runners got fired, but yeah, it's a little just off. Jane Weather's best known, which is not great, but best known as Josephine the Plumber in the 1960s Comet Cleaner commercials. No kidding. Which I looked up to see if it was anything I remembered. It is not, because it is definitely the 60s. Just funny to see like a commercial for like 90 seconds about cleaning products, but it's weird. It is weird.
SPEAKER_01Uh anything to add before we get on the boat? No, no, it's weird. It's weird. No, you know, having watched this episode multiple times and then looking at this guest guest list. Like, what happened? You got all these people here, you got all these players. I just feel like they mismanaged the people this week. Not a terrible episode, but like Jane Withers been Amby Davis, I think. Something happened, man. Somebody got the wrong script in the mail or something, but it just seemed off.
SPEAKER_04I will say this because we had a delay in recording, and so I was going to watch it again today, which would have been my third watch, which I don't normally do, unless it's like a two-parter. And I didn't in part because I felt like my second watch made me like it a lot less than the first watch, and so I thought maybe Transit Property, it was gonna be worse the third time. So I do think this is one remember the I shouldn't even say that because they were okay, but it's like I do think there's a point where, and as we get closer to our childhood, yeah, like real childhood, where it's like these are just people I like and know, and so therefore I'm just automatically gonna like it more because I like Gordon Jump and hey, it's David Hasselhoff, and I love Clifton Davis, and there's Coach's white, you know, it's like whereas this exact same episode with the exact same performances but no names, I probably wouldn't like it as much. So which to your point is it's cool.
SPEAKER_01But that's got to stand on its on it. You know, its legs are only its story, not its that that sort of like, you know, not emotional, but some sort of connection to these characters, whether it's Clifton Davis or even Bernadette Stannis, like any of these people.
SPEAKER_04Listen, very little it just very little happens in this thing. They do a lot of setup and and then nothing really happens. It's it's I I I don't think I realize that when you're first you never realize it when you're first watching it. But when you go back the second time and it's like all right, it's the middle of act. Two, I know where it ends. What are we doing here for the next 25 minutes? I definitely checked the clock this time, which we did not do last week.
SPEAKER_01So yeah, it it was definitely Yeah, I especially with the the Clifton Davis Bernadette's, you know, that whole at the end I was like, Wh where are we now? Yeah. But I mean, it's the 20s, right, of the season. It's episode in the 20s, it's still that thing. I again I I'm not I'm not sure.
SPEAKER_04I don't want to no, it's not a it's not a bad episode. It's not a bad episode, but I also think it's that thing a lot. And I also think it's that thing where the middle of the season was so bad for the most part that we are calling these good or okay or fine when you know it's just not bad. So which is fine. It hasn't been a good season. It just hasn't been. Like, not aggressively bad, but just not good.
SPEAKER_01Like I think I've been I felt like uh aside from a few episodes, whether it's you know the Stubing, you know, reuniting with with Vicky, you know, that whole Stubing his brother. Yeah, it's just there was a lot of coasting.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, yeah. Very uninspired season, I would say, for the most part. Except for the two parts, which are great. So who knows? Maybe the 90-minute next week will be it'll knock our socks off. All right, let's get on the boat. A frantic Isaac is looking around the lobby, and he finally ends up asking Julie if a Janet Reeves has boarded yet. Turns out that Janet is a former classmate and a famous model actress. Isaac hasn't seen her in years. Like, they were classmates in first grade. Can you name one student that you went to school with in first grade?
SPEAKER_01Like not a one. Not a one. I don't know if you'd even consider that a classmate at that point.
SPEAKER_04I have a pretty good memory for that kind of stuff, but I also basically had the same classmates from first grade through eighth grade, and then some in high school, and then some in college. Like, so it was like, you know, I don't I don't think somebody who left in first grade, even if they became famous, I don't know, unless there was like an article that said they went to this school.
SPEAKER_01You know, it's like there's no and and that's funny too, having moved around a lot. I was like, I I couldn't tell you.
SPEAKER_04Maybe you're Janet Reeves.
SPEAKER_01Could be.
SPEAKER_04Speaking of her, here they are. Janet and her husband, Mr. Reeves.
SPEAKER_01He's never, he's always got his guard up. Not gonna give you my first name. My first name is Mr. Last name is Reeves. Yeah.
SPEAKER_04Chris Christopher. Julie is a fan, but eventually gives out their room assignments, promenade one oh four, as Isaac is hiding behind everybody like the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders.
SPEAKER_01Like they're like he's gonna get recognized. Number one, you have a mustache, and number two, you're wearing a tuxedo. Probably you didn't have you had neither one of those things in first grade, sir. I think you're safe. What if he did? He dressed like a disco owl in first grade. Like just don't let her go over the wheel.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, right. 1951. Doc tells Isaac that it's wise to be shy around athletic looking husbands because he hates burials at sea too splashy. Doc quickly joins Gopher to start checking out ladies.
SPEAKER_01Doesn't take long. Doesn't take long.
SPEAKER_04Nope. And they kind of start doing like a two by two kind of thing and all this, and it's pretty ham fisted, but they spot one lady, Shelly Fabriz, who is there by herself, and Bricker's like, ah, see, there's someone who's there to relax, not for romance. The doc would be wrong. Because out of nowhere comes David Hassel, like a specter, and just tries to remove her tonsils.
SPEAKER_01So I know you I know you don't like that. No, like, come on, man. The other thing that's weird is I thought that even from his introduction of the episode, I thought that he came across so aggressive and so and then later on he came across so desperate. I just thought I guess Tom Bell is nowhere near as sort of I don't know, confident as David Hasselhoff was. Because I that's the one thing I didn't get.
SPEAKER_04Like, why didn't you just you know I I think despite the fact that I like both these people and I liked the performances of both these people, I think it was terrible casting for what they were trying to go for.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, same man. Because he was too much man for the role.
SPEAKER_04Because the spoiler, they were trying to portray an age difference and they didn't look that different in ages, and then you have a guy like Hasselhoff who just what they needed to have was a guy who was acting like a 2-year-old and having that confidence, but it was clearly like covering up desperation or insecurity or stuff like that, and they they just didn't have that because you had freaking David Hasselhoff on 15, you know.
SPEAKER_01So or you know, and the I think the easiest thing to to fix this would be if we would switch Ann B. Davis and let her play Kathy. You want older? We'll give you older, we'll give you Ann B. Friggin' Davis. We'll give you Ann B.
SPEAKER_04Davis Hasselhoff. Oh my god.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_04Julie welcomes the Pier Piedmonts or Piermonts. I don't trust IMDB anymore. And Stubing makes sure Stubbing makes sure to lend his special brand of Walmart Greeter Charm. The the uh the lady Piedmont asks asks a bit of a question of the captain. She's like, hey, quick question. Could you tell me when we get to the the deep water or like what time is that? Stubing's like, oh well, we'll be out of port soon. She's like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. No really deep, yeah, really deep water. So weird. Stubing's an idiot. He doesn't really understand where he's going, so he just says 8 30.
SPEAKER_01That's a great answer. That's great. Just that's wonderful. What the what a responsible response.
SPEAKER_04So 8 30. Great. Mrs. Piedmont kind of says thank you and leaves. Now, Julie definitely understands what's happening here. So she's like, I'll keep an eye on it. I still don't think Steven got it. Even when the music changed, I don't think he got it.
SPEAKER_01So he didn't get it when Vicki said, Oh, I thought she was gonna take all El Divo. Yep. He still didn't get it.
SPEAKER_04Once again, great, great Vicky. Not in this much at all, but she she definitely scoped it out. You know, this that's what happens when you're a part of a cult at age 12, you know.
SPEAKER_01Apparently, just uh yeah, no kidding. Yeah, how about a lot? Just zero awareness. Like, if you're not gonna drive the boat, then maybe you should up your awareness level if you are quote unquote.
SPEAKER_04Right. Like, like, wouldn't wouldn't you always be on guard about people jumping off that boat?
SPEAKER_01I would think so.
SPEAKER_04Like, this woman is clearly asking about weird. It's like, do you know where all the knives are?
SPEAKER_01Like no kidding. Where do you hold where's all the ammunition? Huh? Nothing.
SPEAKER_04Seriously.
SPEAKER_01We'll get to security.
SPEAKER_04We'll get to security later, Mike. So security, sure. All right, gopher is talking to a couple of olds, Gladys and Agnes, who are concerned about the raunchy parties that are gonna be right near their cabin on this trip. Well, Gladys is concerned. Agnes is all about it. Yes, bring it on. Agnes was a bit of a horn dog. And and be horny. Could be, could be. I mean. Speaking of horny, horn. And then that makeout couple, Tom and Kathy. They're checking into their room for the the trip. The trip we conveniently find out like five days. Thank you, Mr. Hasselhoff.
SPEAKER_01That's nice.
SPEAKER_04I like it when they haven't called that out. We usually have to do all the math on that.
SPEAKER_01It's kind of outrageous. Wouldn't you think they'd have to be a couple of things? Kathy lays out. Wouldn't you think they'd have some sort of like was there no themed night on this cruise? Five. It's a five-night cruise. I mean, we were barely at dinner. That was the quickest five. Is he lying? Like, are they just on a three-day cruise? It didn't feel like a five-day cruise.
SPEAKER_04They got off at Port of Aerta, I think, maybe, but like there just wasn't. Yeah, there wasn't a lot to market. I was surprised when they were on the last night that they hadn't really again, nothing happened.
SPEAKER_01Nothing really happened, yeah.
SPEAKER_04So Kathy lays out a lot of the plot for us. We find out that they are co-workers, they're both attorneys, and they've kind of been dating on the slide for a while because they assume that the the old firm wouldn't want them hooking up. And so they're trying to keep it on the sly, but they've been dating for a year, Mike. A year. They're not dating.
SPEAKER_01They're not dating. She was married to somebody, something. That's the thing. They're not dating. That's why I didn't think the story would match the confidence level of these two.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, it's it's an interesting thing. Right. Well, the other thing is too, it's interesting because it is kind of a flip, right? This is usually the woman is pursuing the man who doesn't want the relationship. So look, you know, I appreciate that. I agree. The the age and the fact that it's a a confident Hasselhoff does make it a little harder to swallow. And again, they haven't really laid out the reasons that Kathy has for being a little hesitant, but she comes off as it's funny. Kathy should have come off as the confident person.
SPEAKER_01Yes.
SPEAKER_04And Tom should have come off as the bit of the reticent one because like Kathy is the older person, should have been like, no, I'm cool with this, you know, fuck buddy relationship essentially, and I don't want any more.
SPEAKER_01Well, she'd be like, I was married until we started, you know, this secret relationship. I don't want to get married again. That's what I think really happened here.
SPEAKER_04Well, that's not fair. That's not fair, counselor.
SPEAKER_01How would work no? I object. I'm just saying. Order in the court. Have you ever dated at work? Have I ever dated at work?
SPEAKER_00Yes.
SPEAKER_04Did you have to keep it a secret? I feel like if you can't remember, it's probably a no. So no, no, no.
SPEAKER_01It was a yeah. I'm just it's it's the definition of dating. Yeah. You know what I mean? It wasn't like a courting thing. You didn't go on the love boat. No, no, no, no, it's too public. You know what I mean?
SPEAKER_04You don't want to ultimately Kathy's like, listen, happy the way things are. Just want to have some dinner and some dancing, and you know, I like it. I like it the way things are. And Tom's like, of course, I agree. And then she goes into the bathroom and he whips out a wedding ring, and he's like, Well, we'll see about that. Tom, you cad. You just this guy. Now, I'm not an attorney, and therefore I didn't have attorney money when I bought an engagement ring. But TV is great at people buying engagement rings on spec. And that feels like a huge purchase to make without having nailed that down.
SPEAKER_01So yeah, yeah. Right. You must be doing pretty well if that's just like I'll just pick one.
SPEAKER_04Or that is a trash rings or one of the others.
SPEAKER_01Cardboard ring. Well, remember he says it later on.
SPEAKER_04Maybe he wasn't joking.
SPEAKER_01Oh, we're gonna take this thing back. All right.
SPEAKER_04Mrs. Piedmont's on the rail. Uh-oh. Guess this is the end of this episode.
SPEAKER_01We got it take well. We must be at deep water. Okay.
SPEAKER_04She's looking at she's looking at the ocean. Vicky shows up to, you know, grab her leg, basically. So Vicky does a good job of kind of saying, Yeah, the water looks nice up here, but you know, it's no fun going in.
SPEAKER_01Julie's like, you know, it looks cold from up here, but it's it's really warm. You don't even feel the water when you hit it.
SPEAKER_04It's a lot closer than you think, too.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_04It's not a mr. Mr. Piermont follows up when Vicky leaves and tells his wife that you know, if you're not feeling great or whatever, it's the first day is always the roughest, and she'll be fine tomorrow. Everything'll be fine tomorrow, and she's like, It sure will be. They do all this to a bit of that like TV movie of the week after school special. Yep.
SPEAKER_01They were trying to hook you, man.
SPEAKER_04Do you think they went too long with it or not long enough? Like, I feel like I don't know. I guess I'm just like one or the other.
SPEAKER_01You have to commit to it where you where you go a little bit longer with it, but I think they just kind of hedge their bets where it was like if you're gonna do it, do it. Do it, right?
SPEAKER_04You know, and and I listen, I don't expect them to I don't expect her to jump over the boat. No. And ultimately, if you're gonna get to this thing, but it just seems like I don't like that they were kind of playing No, because she's like it's she's not she's not suicidal at all.
SPEAKER_01Like she's not suicidal at all. Like that's what that's what the whole thing is. And and how how would you know Faye Piermont be completely oblivious to the fact that how all of this would sound to the layman? Yeah.
SPEAKER_04That's what like yeah, there should have been well, and I guess it's that thing where I don't know that they think this this far ahead about what they have in the episode, but it's like you already have a misunderstanding overhearing thing in the other plot. So I guess you couldn't do two that hard, but it's like I don't know. I just I just don't think like, oh, well, suicide on a boat, like you know, you don't like guns on the boat. I don't think I like all the suicide chatter.
SPEAKER_01I don't either alluded to because it's just you you kill him a mojo, it's the love book, yeah. Like, what are we doing? It's very offhanded, it's very off-handed.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, it's it's not the suicide boat.
SPEAKER_01It's not no, but how how how clueless is Bill Piermod? He's just huh? Nothing. He's not picking up on this. He's like, don't listen to anything. She's just she's crazy. Nothing.
SPEAKER_04Didn't even poor the big guy. All right, well, speaking of tuned-in husbands, Mike Taylor as Clifton Davis. So missing we are in the Reeves cabin, and Janet is showing off one of her sexy outfits. But Mr. Reeves doesn't have time for that, Mike, because it is hockey time.
SPEAKER_01That's right. Nothing hockey on the radio either.
SPEAKER_04He is trying like hell to get the Rangers Bruins game in on a radio, on the boat in the Pacific Ocean. Well, they're not in deep water then. Well, turns out that you can't even get that game on the radio because all they play is music. That's all that's piped in. And uh, Janet knows this because she called ahead. She's pretty smart, Mike, but Mr. Reeves is smarter because he brought his own radio.
SPEAKER_01He did a giant radio, too, not a small one.
SPEAKER_04So it's clearly not the first time this happened. Janet's like, alright, I'll I'll let you go this time. He's like, I promise we'll, you know, we'll do something after the this big Rangers Bruins game. Clifton Davis has to have his pucks.
SPEAKER_01I remember uh texting you on my honeymoon as I was as I was sitting back in day one of my honeymoon watching Monday Night Raw in Jamaica. I thought it was the coolest thing in the world.
SPEAKER_04But Clifton Davis and the Love Boat themselves are damn liars, Mike, because on April 19th, 1980, the New York Rangers were not playing the Boston Bruins. They were getting shut out in game three of the quarterfinals against your Philadelphia Flyers. Oh wow. Flyers would go on to lose the Stanley Cup final to the Islanders in controversial fashion. Maybe they've won so many Stanley Cups since then. So this posits that the NHL had a national radio contract in 1980, which does not feel realistic.
SPEAKER_01Off the coast of California, like in a five-day cruise or the whatever station the Rangers were on had really good signal.
SPEAKER_03What the FAN?
SPEAKER_04It's it's five billion watts of radio sound.
SPEAKER_01Jeez.
SPEAKER_04Alright. We are poolside as Gopher checks in with Mr. Piermont, who is shock, shock, shocked. At all the scantily clad women around this pool, Michael.
SPEAKER_01They were turning it up right around him. I will say that the the scantily clad bikini ladies thing is really every week, it's getting a little more egregious. Just it it it it they're really kind of letting go with it. Like I guess bikinis equal ratings, but I just feel like we're seeing a lot more of it this season than we did in the past, too.
SPEAKER_04Does it feel like it's that thing where it almost just feels like a casting call, right? Like that's just like for all the they have no problem filling out those scenes. They can't give me three other people in white outfits to be pretend they're crew members. Or a first name. First name, yeah. This leads, of course, to Gladys doing the same thing when she's speaking to Agnes about all these scantily clad women, saying some of these bikinis cost fifty dollars a pop, and old Ambi Davis starts looking for fifty bucks.
SPEAKER_01Look at her. She's rated look at her.
SPEAKER_04I will say this criminally underused, very derivative. She was good in what she did. Like I think she hit all the lines they gave her. It was just Oh, absolutely. Who cares? Yeah. It could have been Anne Bin anybody.
SPEAKER_01It was so unnecessary, that role. It really added nothing to the story or the episode as a whole. I mean, it wasn't, you know, it was just like they were just witnesses. Yeah. But not even witnesses. Just weird.
SPEAKER_04Isaac is bartending, and thank God he yelled loud enough to tell this people to come back and get their limes that he forgot. Like, what was that drink? Like a rum and lime, and you forgot that Isaac?
SPEAKER_01It looked like more limes than rum. I mean, by far.
SPEAKER_04I love that too when a bartender just hands me limes out of his hand. In a knife. We used to go to a place that well, Mexican place. We used to go to a Mexican place where I would get like Tacates or who knows, Pacificos, some Mexican beer. And they would put a lime in the glass. And we would end up using the same glass a lot because I don't think we were paying for the drinks or whatever. But by the end of the night, it would just be I could camel my beers with the limes. Dios mío. Gopher pops around and asks Isaac if he's talked to Janet yet, but he doesn't want to bother her, man. No, you don't want to mess. But Gopher will bother her, and he goes over to talk to Janet Reese. Somehow, and we kind of talked about this already. Janet remembers Isaac from first grade.
SPEAKER_01Or she's really nice. Even his last name. Although he's going to say Isaac Washington, Oakland, California. Oh no, who knows?
SPEAKER_04I went here for first grade. I was in a play with you. Yeah, it turns out they were also in a play together. Janet played Ladybug, Susie Sunshine, Gardener. Gardener? While Isaac was a dewdrop. I was a narrator in almost every school play. Really? Because I was the best reader.
unknownHmm.
SPEAKER_01I I was grumpy in the Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs in kindergarten, and then later on I wrote a play in second grade after Reagan got shot. I played Ronald Reagan. Yup. Double R. Well, wait, is this?
SPEAKER_04Real?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, no, this is real. It's 100% real. Yeah.
SPEAKER_04This isn't the James Brady episode.
SPEAKER_01This is the James Brady episode. Jason. It's James Brady adjacent, but no, no. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was a whole thing.
SPEAKER_04I can't title the episode James Brady as Jason, but I really want to.
SPEAKER_01I mean that's fine. James Brady Jason. Yeah.
SPEAKER_04Yeah. So anyway, these two remember they were classmates. I don't know how. I mean, like I said, that's but good for her. She does remember. And just then the phone rings. Isaac picks it up, and hey, it's for Janet, because that's how phones work on this boat.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, I thought shipped ashore was like a whole frickin' ordeal you had to set up and everything else.
SPEAKER_04They can just call and be like I feel like calling in, we've seen a lot more. Because remember when Janet Lee, not Janet Lee, Michelle Lee had all those fake calls. So I feel like calling in is easier than calling out. I don't know why, but this was clearly a very important call from our agent because they didn't talk about anything.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, I'm just gonna say you bothering her on vacation to talk nothing.
SPEAKER_04Yeah. The agent calls, and Janet basically tells him that, oh yeah, you know, Mr. Reeves is doing what he does. He loves his pucks, loves the Rangers or the Bruins, and neither of whom made the Stanley Cup finals in 1980. But I I can't believe it. He used to care about me, used to dodo me, and man, he would get jealous at any man who would even look at me, and then she those wheels start spinning, Mike. There we go. There's a thing. Those lady wheels start spinning. And she said, I might have a plan here. And she says, I'll talk to you tomorrow, agent. Then she goes over and gives Isaac a little bit of a smooch. And we get a Isaac face to go to commercial. He is stunned by this. Especially because, like, you know, first grade, first grade's not when you have a toward affair.
SPEAKER_01So when you were watching this episode at this point of the first break of the episode, what were your thoughts? Were you thinking, oh boy, I kind of know what this is? Where were you?
SPEAKER_04Yeah, with with with that with that storyline, yeah. Yeah. Like that storyline to me was like, okay, this is gonna No, I didn't know how they were gonna land it, but yeah, ultimately, Mr. Reeves didn't seem like a jealous type, he seemed like a distracted type, right? So so yeah. But I was just happy Isaac was getting some work, honestly. Completely. And again, that almost falls that almost falls into what I said about the guest stars that we like. It's just I'm was happy to see Isaac get some stuff because it's been so it's been so thin for him this season. Yeah, not the slimpickens. Not the straw.
unknownNo, sir.
SPEAKER_04Act two, we are in the dining room as an army of red jackets waiters surrounds the Pierpont table. So many red goats. That's a thing. They they've decided to use all their extra budget on waiters, but not real waiters. Just these thematic waiters.
SPEAKER_01Where's Sid the waiter? Like they need a waiter, and they don't the other thing with this, I don't know if you noticed, so I'm looking at the food. It was like a buffet, but instead of like people coming up and putting the food on their plate themselves, the waiters were putting the food on the plate, and I'm like, what that's a great buffet, though.
SPEAKER_04Let me get let me get some of that.
SPEAKER_01Let me get some of that too. You yell from across the room. Yeah, I don't know how that works, but it was such a weird very fancy. Like it is weird, yeah.
SPEAKER_04But ironically enough, Mr. Piermont thinks that he's not dressed up fancy enough, and that they'll probably do a little better tomorrow. Oh, yeah, I'm sure. Mrs. Piermont uh excuses herself, she needs to run back to the cabin to get a wrap. She smooches Gordon Jump on the way out, and he's like, What will people think? They'll think I love my husband or something like that. So they're establishing that you know, this is a loving marriage, which the synopsis would not have you think.
SPEAKER_01But or they'll think that she kissed her husband before she jumped off the rail, like over into the deep water. It's one of those two things is gonna happen.
SPEAKER_04No, we she's on her way out the dining room and she runs into Julie, and Julie's like, hey, just so you know, ding dong, it's 8:30. We're in the deep water, boat's not shaking, so no worries here.
SPEAKER_01Thanks, Julie. Why did you Mrs.
SPEAKER_04Pirmont? I mean, Julie did the best she could. This should not have been Julie's responsibility. There is a doctor on the boat.
SPEAKER_01Follow-up. Literature would never arrive safely in the deep water. Like she didn't need to do that. She just uh keep an eye on it.
SPEAKER_04So if you're gonna ask yourself, Mrs. Pirmont's like, I need to talk someone, I'm losing my nerve. Julie's like, huh? I need to throw something overboard. Me. So then she runs off.
SPEAKER_01How is she taking us to commercial? Good lord, what a what a cliffhanger that would have been.
SPEAKER_04Good point. And I think the fact that they rolled into the second act actually makes me like this is where you had to go three acts with it.
SPEAKER_01Right. You know? Yeah, yeah, yeah, absolutely.
SPEAKER_04Julie took a beat before she went after her. But she did eventually go after her.
SPEAKER_01So I don't know what she's gonna do. She's gonna go over there and go, hey, it's it's just past 8:30. We're gonna be out of the dark water or the uh the deep water soon.
SPEAKER_04If you want to do that, she's gonna be like, get in line, sister. I've had a terrible season. No kidding.
SPEAKER_01Why are you wrong the word Chanot over and over again with a pocket knife? No reason. That's quite a name to repeat writing with a pocket knife, too.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, can you throw this over?
SPEAKER_01It's just Jack Cheneau's body. This was his w this is his new wedding ring on his stupid. It's his new wife. Oh.
SPEAKER_04Turn this boat around, Stubing. Turn it around. Tom and Kathy are headed to dinner. But that ring is burning a hole in Hasselhouse pocket. So he pops it out. Kathy hesitates. But Tom doesn't need to wait on an answer. At least not now. A little dinner, a little bit of wine. Surely she'll turn that hesitation into a yes.
SPEAKER_01Oh, yeah. Yeah, especially if you just you make sure she has no room to breathe. Just just stick your body on her on like just don't let her move without you. You see how they were sitting on the same side of the table thing. Oh, God. God, I hate that. Yeah, no, no bueno there. Not a fan of that.
SPEAKER_04Well, it's not bad manners. I just don't like it.
SPEAKER_01Like, you know. Is it bad manners though?
SPEAKER_04No, I don't think it's bad manners. Why? To sit on the same side of the booth with somebody?
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_04But why is it bad manners?
SPEAKER_01I don't like it. I don't know. I just wouldn't think like if there's no.
SPEAKER_04Well, it's never like people who don't know each other. You're saying like as a as a married couple, when you were dating, if your wife, then wife, or now wife, was sitting on the side. Right. And you sat down next to her, she would be in every right to say ghost on the other side.
SPEAKER_01No, I'm just saying like the manor police would probably come out and say something, or your waiter would be like, mmm. I don't know. I just always thought it was not cool to do that.
SPEAKER_04I mean, I agree with you, but I don't think it's manners. I don't know. I'm very hung up on the fact that it's manners.
SPEAKER_01Or like, you know, just like an etiquette. Like if you ask Miss Manners, is it okay to sit guarantee Miss Manners? Oh, okay. No.
SPEAKER_04See, here's my thing is I don't like it because if it's just two people and we're having a conversation, I gotta now do this. Like that's that's it doesn't make sense.
SPEAKER_01It doesn't make sense. Have I done it? Yeah, I've done it. Oh, I've done it. Oh, I've done it.
SPEAKER_04Tom actually says that he wants Stubing to officiate the wedding.
SPEAKER_01You know? Like, whoa. That's what I'm saying. Is it it it doesn't even match. A guy looking like the Hof does in this scene, it doesn't make any sense that he wants to get married like this second. It makes no sense. Look at him.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, you're right. The the the casting and the confidence that the casting implies definitely didn't help. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Or you gotta make Kathy older. Like significantly older. Yeah. Make her look older or something.
SPEAKER_04She should have, yeah, she should have been Ginger Rogers.
SPEAKER_01Well, for a show that likes to play with ages, they just didn't do a good job here with this couple in particular.
SPEAKER_04Well, here's the thing. Okay. I have it later. No, I agree. I have it, I have it later. What do you think the actual age gap is between the two actors?
SPEAKER_01I think Hasselhoff was probably in his uh maybe three years older than him, two years older than him. Eight.
SPEAKER_04It is eight years.
SPEAKER_01Okay. Yeah.
SPEAKER_04So, but I just don't think it's the right, I just don't think it's the right people. They needed somebody who looked younger than Hasselhoff, or to your point, older than Shelley Fabrice.
SPEAKER_01So I mean they had Jane Withers right there, but Peggy Gass, too. Anyway, yeah.
SPEAKER_04But she had to play the plumber from the cleaning commercial.
SPEAKER_01100%. She was busy that day.
SPEAKER_04Julie tracks down Mrs. Piedmont Piermont. She doesn't like throw her body in front of the rail, but she does get to her. And don't worry, Mrs. Pierremont's not going to kill herself. At least they didn't play like a musical, like.
SPEAKER_01I'm glad they told us it like 18 minutes into the episode.
SPEAKER_04You know, if I turn the channel, I'll never I assume she's dead.
SPEAKER_01Well, you wouldn't recognize her. You'd turn the channel and come back and be like, who's that lady? Not an abundant.
SPEAKER_04That's true. She doesn't want to kill herself, she just wants to kill the quote old Faye Pierremont. She she and Bill have been married for nearly 20 years now. And you know what? All her other friends have been married that long, they're not married no more, Mike. People get bored, people get stale, they need to spice it up.
SPEAKER_01Couldn't she have done this at home? Why did you need to come on a ship to get to change your outfit?
SPEAKER_04Like, hey, do you ever hear like a storage unit? Just put it on.
SPEAKER_01You gotta go to deep water to throw away some clothes. Just hang them up. You might want to put them on another time. I don't know why this is so dramatic. Is there not a good will? Like it's like the love boat. It's not the wardrobe boat. This has nothing to do with love. What are we doing?
SPEAKER_03It's not the wardrobe boat. You are correct.
SPEAKER_01It's just ridiculous, Faye.
SPEAKER_04Come on. She's been secretly putting on contacts to get ready to get rid of those Coke bottle glasses that she had. And you know, contacts in 1980 were probably not great. So like hubcaps. Ooh, she's got to imagine. She's got some new clothes, and she's not sure what Bill will think. But Julie, advice columnist Julie McCoy is back.
SPEAKER_01Oof, she needs to discontinue that column immediately.
SPEAKER_04And she says that she should go for it. And who better it ask about?
SPEAKER_01You know what? Whatever Julie says, do the opposite. Just run the other direction. Jeez.
SPEAKER_03There should be an ABS system for Julie's advice.
SPEAKER_01She needs an escort, so if she starts giving advice, that person goes, don't listen to anything that she's saying.
SPEAKER_04Just don't listen to it. Julie, you know what? I will listen to you in season four, honey, but this year has not been good for you. Alright, back in the Reeves cabin. Janet is hatching her devious plan to make Clifton Davis jealous. Problem is Mr. Reeves isn't paying attention because Gopher got some extra headphones from the radio room. And now he can't hear a damn thing except for Rangers Bruins action. He's happy.
SPEAKER_01Look at him. Look how happy Reeves is.
SPEAKER_04Shouldn't the radio room like need the extra headphones? Like, what happens if we've seen a lot of problems in the radio room?
SPEAKER_01Guys like, I hear great. Give them give them away. And when you're done, throw them overboard. Throw them with bay Pierre Mont's clothes. No kidding. In the deep water.
SPEAKER_04I'm gonna kill myself. I mean the old headphones.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, um where's the dark? Where's the deep water? Why? So you could no no no. I just I need to throw away an outfit or two.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, I mean, you really could have if you're gonna just throw them out and you really want to throw it into the water, you don't need it to be in the deep. There's not gonna be a search and rescue for your shawl, man.
SPEAKER_01Like put it in the in the fucking garbage can.
SPEAKER_04There you go. Like, what's wrong with you? Give it to people. People need clothes.
SPEAKER_01You don't seriously don't dump it in the ocean like it's some sort of bottle of ketchup. Are you crazy? That's not what it's like.
SPEAKER_04It's not a salvation army, Faye. Come on.
SPEAKER_01Sharks aren't gonna eat that polyester. Come on. You're just being mean, Faye. Just it just lands on ketchup island. Kills so many animals. Oh, so many. My god. She's like worse than the Exxon Valdez. And she brought she brought her entire. Yeah, how many how many clothes did she throw out? Just one? She threw out her entire wardrobe.
SPEAKER_04Plus, like, unless it's a heavy outfit, like if you throw it, she can't throw it that far. She's gonna get caught up in the propellant.
SPEAKER_03The boat exploded.
SPEAKER_01Boat explodes. Leaves us vulnerable to pirates. Unbelievable. Faye doesn't give two craps about anyone else on this boat.
SPEAKER_03It's a trap. It's a trap.
SPEAKER_01She sucks. Yeah. Very weak. Faye.
SPEAKER_04Did not see that coming. I didn't either. I didn't either. The upshot, and this is the upshot of most of this plot, is that Janet Reeves is in the other room pretending to either have a conversation with Isaac or talk about Isaac or talk about Isaac in a way where it'll make Mr. Reeves jealous. Problem is, of course, Mr. Reeves is very deep into Ron Duguet. I don't even know who's on the Rangers in 1980, but it's though.
SPEAKER_01Is it Chris Jericho's dad? Didn't he play from back then?
SPEAKER_04Dick Kerman. I think he might have been a little older. So I think John Davidson is the goaltender and not the guy from That's Incredibles. Problem is, Gopher does not have giant headphones on, so he's hearing all this, including the part where Janet says that Isaac is all hands. That's why I call him the octopus. And I'm thinking like they think would they call me octopus in first grade? Because he was all hands. Like, what's this?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, what kind of that's why they were split up. Isaac went to a different school after that happened. We don't talk about that. Jeez.
SPEAKER_04He's all hands, and not the ones that you put in paint and then hang on the fridge.
SPEAKER_01And the thing is too, is Gopher was there when they basically got reintroduced to each other.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_01He was there. So it's like he clearly saw Isaac. I don't know. It was a weird guys that know each other so well. Gopher who Isaac was. Right. Gopher didn't not believe it enough for me.
SPEAKER_04Yeah. Like, what? And why not just be like, hey man, do you hooking up with the lady? And then Isaac's like, what the hell are you talking about? And that's the end of the plot.
SPEAKER_01If he did that though, then the mini story with Agnes and Gladys would be a moot porn.
SPEAKER_04Oh no. Oh no. The more we talk about this, the more I don't like this episode. I did not think this was going to happen. I'm glad I'm glad I didn't watch it again, though. Alright, FaZe on the rail again. Jesus Christ. She's like a slot hot game.
SPEAKER_01Like, how hard is it?
SPEAKER_04They got the money's worth of that rail set this week. Good lord. Alright, so now she's finally chucking stuff. Not since Chef Borgia have we seen so much stuff get tossed overboard. Bill shows up because his wife's been gone for hours. But Bill finally shows up, asks a lady if he's seen his wife. Turns out that lady is in fact his wife. He can't believe it. Faye's new fancy outfit, no glasses, and an attitude to match.
SPEAKER_01Imagine he goes back to the room thinking Faye's gonna be there. Not only is there Milton Burl's hat. All of her clothes are gone. What what happened? Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_04Yeah. Look long long story short. The point is that she's worried because all these other people got divorced, and so she wants to be more adventurous, or what'd she call it? The fluff and fold set. Like it was just but basically she wants to spice things up with her wardrobe and she wants to build a match, and so she takes this tie and throws it into the drink as well.
SPEAKER_01Isn't isn't isn't waiting until you go on a on a friggin' cruise bringing your wardrobe and throwing it in the water. It's like, look at me, I'm careful in the dark in front in front of no.
SPEAKER_04It's not just that, man. Like, was there what what was the equivalent of face play? Have a yard sale. Let's get some money back on this stuff. Something. Leave your metaphors at home, Faye. That radio station is failing. Have you not seen Andy Travis? Can only do so much.
SPEAKER_01What do you even do? Can you afford to be gone for five days right now? No. Faye.
SPEAKER_04They do eventually smooch, and Gordon Jump's like, let's head back to the cabin and I'll give you a Gordon Jump.
SPEAKER_01She's like, My eyes. These contacts burn my eyes, and he's like, Shut up. Shut up. I like this. I like your eyes better now. Shh, shut up, shut up, Faye.
SPEAKER_04Alright, late night, and Tom is trying once again to get Kathy to agree to his proposal. They can even wake up the captain. I'm sure he's a light sleeper. Tom, did you not see the episode with the fortune teller? He is not a light sleeper.
SPEAKER_01Is Kathy a you know a millionaire or something? Like he just wants to get married so he can throw her off the like. I don't know what what is the hurry? He loves her man. Nobody, I mean, come on.
SPEAKER_04Oh, stop it. You're telling me if when you proposed, if your wife was like, you would have been like cool, you would have been cool with waiting a couple days.
SPEAKER_03I've seen you be way more impatient over way less.
SPEAKER_01These are all very good points. Um it is true. I you know what it is again. I think it's I think it's the the weird casting. It is like inspiration. It's like weird.
SPEAKER_04It's like yeah, I I was focused on the age part, and I think that's true, but you are really nail on the confidence level that Hasselhoff brings, not just as the Hasselhoff that we would eventually know, like how we're coming into it. Right. I just think how he's playing it. He is playing it.
SPEAKER_01I mean, he's yeah, it's hard.
SPEAKER_04It was weird. It is, it is. He's he's so much. And I feel like Shelly Fabriz is probably playing it a little understated, like maybe if she was a little bit more and he was a lot less, or somebody else, but she's not exactly coming off a confident at all. It's a we it's it's weird. It you're right. I hadn't thought about that, and you're absolutely right.
SPEAKER_01Or or maybe it was just they were overthinking it to put this giant nuance in the episode to be like, we're gonna have this guy, he's a good looking guy, but where he's not gonna be as confident. You know what I mean? I I could see him doing that too. It's just I think it was Hoff. Hoff was too, they didn't know Hoff was too good for this. He was too you can't put Hoff on page.
SPEAKER_04All right. We get a Three's company episode here in the middle.
unknownWe really do.
SPEAKER_04Janet is again trying to make Mr. Reeves jealous, and so she's really ramping up the Isaac passion chatter, and even starts pretending that he's like tearing her dress off and it's really getting ribbled. Of course, the only person who hears this is Gladys and Agnes. They look out the door, they don't see anybody, but that's I'm sure that'll I'm sure that'll come up at some point. Janet is like Janet wrecked herself, man.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, she's all she was she's she's selling. Good for her. She's a good actress.
SPEAKER_04She is a good actress. Janet Reeves is an excellent actress. But sorry, Clifton Davis loves. Pucks. So when she comes into the room, he's like, How long were you on the deck? So I love you.
SPEAKER_01That's a whole eating snacks. He's sitting in his room. He's like, This is great.
SPEAKER_04That's a whole act of a television show on television.
SPEAKER_01He's loving life.
SPEAKER_04Act three. It's the next morning. Tom and Kathy are in their cabin. And Tom has questions that need to be asked, and they need to be asked before the first cup of coffee. Kathy's like, ah it's too much, man.
SPEAKER_01It's so much.
SPEAKER_04Because she needs her coffee.
SPEAKER_01Well, because she's older.
SPEAKER_04We finally get the upshot. So in addition to the whole divorce and you know all that stuff. So she is ten years older than him. And so her concern is not now, but that in a few years people will look at them and think that she's old and he's a what did they say? Like some kinky fling. And basically she's worried that she'll look like a cougar. I mean that cougar didn't exist back then, but I guess she's basically worried about being a cougar or perceived as a cougar.
SPEAKER_01What do you consider yourself to be a male cougar? If we if if if the script was flipped? If you're male, Kathy, your wife is female Tom Bell.
SPEAKER_04Does that no, but I I what you're saying is basically that I am I am older than my wife, and you know, as we learned a few weeks ago, that's the best way to do it. As Stubing said, I follow my life by Meryl Stubing's marriage rules. I would say I thought about it maybe at the very beginning, but certainly I never thought about it in the way of future like how it would be perceived in the future and things like that.
SPEAKER_01It wasn't a no because of something you might feel like 20 years.
SPEAKER_04Now, 15 years later? No, no, that would have been I certainly yeah, that it it it feels like something that you would think when you just don't want to get married again, to your point.
SPEAKER_01Well, it's it's a it's a it's a it's a ready excuse. You know what I mean? If you're really hard up for a for an excuse not to do it, there it is.
SPEAKER_04We got some good Hasselhoff bits here. He says I can let myself go, and you know, I'm 10 inches taller than you, who cares, and all that kind of stuff. And then he has a really good line where it's basically like, you know, you certainly have a problem with the age difference, and he's not saying it in an argumentative way, he's not. He's I would hate to fight with Hasselhoff in a relationship. It feels like he's very good at it.
SPEAKER_01He takes his shirt off, too, and default and be like, come on, buddy, it's not even fair.
SPEAKER_04But he basically says, You didn't have a problem with the age difference when we were fooling around. You have a very modern look on us fooling around this way, but the age difference you care about what people think, and that's that's not consistent. You're a bit of a hypocrite. And so I thought that was a good piece of business there. Yeah, it is a lot before coffee.
SPEAKER_01Ugh. I couldn't deal with that.
SPEAKER_04Before coffee. I agree.
SPEAKER_01Just put a pin in that. Jesus. What are we doing?
SPEAKER_04Don't talk to me before my coffee.
SPEAKER_01Come on.
SPEAKER_04I used to have a rule at work. Don't talk to me before 10 a.m.
SPEAKER_01I mean, don't hit me with craziness.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, no, don't talk to me about marriage proposals before 10 a.m. No, no. All right, Bill is showing off his new wardrobe, the stuff they got from the gift shop, which again, the gift shop has a lot of clothes, but Julie had to go beg other passengers to give Sonny Bono clothes.
SPEAKER_01And that medallion, Sonny Bono could have used that thing last season.
SPEAKER_03He could have sold it. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01He'd have left with that thing. Borrow Schmarrow. I'm out of here.
SPEAKER_04They head off to the bar, and Gordon Jump orders a couple beers, but beers are for stiffs, man. You don't want that. Give me a scorpion, two scorpions. Which is a lot of stuff, but basically five different kinds of rum. Real drink, fake drink. I think it's a real drink. I mean, there's definitely five kinds of rum. It sounds awful. It's just well, I think at some point it all like I don't like white rum. Anything that has white rum in it, you can taste white rum.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_04But you know, I've had like rum runners and stuff like that. So it's just a lot of weird. That's a lot. Like, what do you think? It's a lot for somebody who clearly never drinks liquor to then have five rums.
SPEAKER_01Why don't you just have like a something and ginger ale? Well, you gotta.
SPEAKER_04Why just have some of them lines that Isaac's just barehanding?
SPEAKER_01So so is there no limit to this? We're gonna spice things up. So we're not gonna drink the same, we're not gonna we're not gonna eat the same foods. Like what how far is Faye Piermont gonna take this nonsense?
SPEAKER_04And bravo to Bill for I mean, far enough that she can save her marriage by killing her husband.
SPEAKER_01So it's giving him alcohol poisoning. Jeez.
SPEAKER_04We we are live. In the C Wind spa, Mike, it's time for another giston of Julie's Jazzer Size Exercise Class.
SPEAKER_01This out of nowhere. It's like flash mob.
SPEAKER_04Just the thing now? Julie's the his ed teacher. I don't get that at all. That's like what three three times we've three times we've seen this now?
SPEAKER_01Well, and she's never dressed for working out. It just doesn't make any sense. It's just like here, stand here, touch your knees.
SPEAKER_04Like, there's no it's always very quick. It's always like 10 seconds. That's it.
SPEAKER_01I do small work, I do a seven-second workout.
SPEAKER_04Was Jane Fonda already a thing with that in 1980? Because that's what it feels like, a direct response to that, right?
SPEAKER_01I was thinking about that too. I think that was a little bit later, but not later. That's what I thought.
SPEAKER_04That's what I thought. But maybe they were ahead of it. Maybe Jane Fonda ripped off Julie McCoy. Ugh, another loss. Damn it. First Jack and now Jane.
SPEAKER_01Oh, maybe Jane Fonda is married to Jack Chanot. She's the new mom. Julie will never be. Oh my god. I know.
SPEAKER_04Alaskan Jane. Faye and Faye and Bill are going hard on this. And Bill has a funny line where he's like, Are you doing this for the insurance money? And that was pretty funny.
SPEAKER_01What what a sport Bill Piermont is, by the way.
SPEAKER_04Oh yeah. It's funny, they never really even they never really even did like a he didn't put up much resistance. And when he did, when he did, it was more like, to your point, like, I've been down for all this, but there's gotta be an endpoint, right? Like, you know, so could we talk?
SPEAKER_01So it's no kidding before you Yeah. Hello.
SPEAKER_04Also, the Coast Guard's gonna arrest us when we get off the boat for littering.
unknownNo kidding.
SPEAKER_04We get a uh pretty cool directorial move where we pan right from the exercise class over to the hot tub. Where our good friend well, the last Tom we saw on this hot tub almost died, so but we see Tom and Kathy enjoying themselves. Tom is again putting a little pressure on it, but they've kind of agreed at this point that she has till the end of the cruise to decide what she's gonna decide.
SPEAKER_01Hey, so Mike, so this hot tub can I just want to talk about it real quick because this thing is not to treat injuries or or aching muscles. People come in here to make out, right? Remember last week, hot tub Annie, she was all about it. Matt tries to, you know.
SPEAKER_04I don't know. Matt, apologies. That was not Tom. Tom was the brother. I apologize, yeah.
SPEAKER_01Matt almost dying, but it's like this is such a weird that hot tub scene is just so weird to me. It's just people just attacking each other in the in the freaking hot tub.
SPEAKER_04So I know what you're saying, but I think when the Princess Lime was building it, they built the gym, right? Right. The gym is new, the gym came last year, and so either they had to build it out from where an existing hot tub was, or they realized they needed to get, you know, they had a hot tub there already, kind of thing. Like I don't think it's a medicinal hot tub, I guess, is my point.
SPEAKER_01Oh, yeah, no, I see what you're saying. It's just no weird, but I guess the spa is not really a gym either, right?
SPEAKER_04No, it's a it's a living room with a couple dumbbells and a jump rope, and then sometimes sometimes balance beams. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01The weird spot.
SPEAKER_04I will say Kathy's hair in this hot tub looks fantastic. That humidity is doing wonders for her hair.
SPEAKER_01She looks great. Look at you. That's why wrestlers wet their hair right there.
SPEAKER_03Listen, I'm from the Northeast, man. I'm down, I'm down for that hot tub hair. Here we go.
SPEAKER_01Look like Kurt Henning in that pot tub hair.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_04It is time for another episode of the Stubing Mysteries. Here we go. Gladys, Gladys is explaining what happened the night before, what she heard, and she's telling this to Stubing and Gopher and the bartender for some reason.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, that was weird. I don't know why. Where's the security guy? We so need a security guy on this boat.
SPEAKER_04Gladys didn't have her glasses on, so she didn't see what happened, but you know, she's certain that he was big. Stubing assures her this won't happen again, and he tells Gopher, stop everything you're doing.
unknownOkay.
SPEAKER_04And and contact security. What was he doing? He's doing this.
SPEAKER_03He's like, okay, good.
SPEAKER_01Already done. One step ahead of you.
SPEAKER_04So Stubing leaves, and Gopher's like, okay, cool. We actually need some details now. And Gladys is like, I didn't see anything, but I heard a name. And that name, of course, was Isaac. Well. But I guess Gladys didn't read the name tag that says Isaac Washington from Oakland, California.
SPEAKER_01So he didn't know. No, she didn't know.
SPEAKER_04No. But ultimately.
SPEAKER_01What would that mean? He's in a red jacket of all that.
SPEAKER_04That's true. He works for budget rent a car. Right.
SPEAKER_01Some man in a uniform with a red jacket named Isaac. Doesn't sound familiar.
SPEAKER_04So, like we talked about before, Gopher is kind of giving Isaac the side eye, and Isaac like, come on, man, I didn't do it. But Isaac, like, I'll or Gopher's like, I'll figure it out, but give me some time, maybe stay away from Janet just in case.
SPEAKER_01So just cover for your boy. How about that? Jeez.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, this this old woman didn't have anything really at all, you know. So and I like the fact that Stubing would be like, Yep, Isaac, definitely. It's definitely this Isaac, right?
SPEAKER_01So I'm surprised that Stubing didn't say he's fired. He'll be fired on the spot.
SPEAKER_04You know, he likes to get these big sweeping. Oh, he does, yeah. All right. Doc is examining Bill, who's got a case disco disc from Julie's Jazer Size class. Bill then asked Bricker. That's every class, Mike. I mean, only six minutes. It only takes one lunge. I mean, look what happened to Christopher George. Look what happened to Bud Pomeroy.
SPEAKER_01I mean, so we have like, what is it, seven-minute abs? This is six minutes of touching toes, I guess. I don't know. I get it.
SPEAKER_04Julie's every one of Julie's exercise classes lasts as long as one of her relationships.
SPEAKER_01Well, it's funny is back injury only happens after he had a drink with 18 different kinds of rum in it. It's just kind of a weird coincidence.
SPEAKER_04Can't feel my legs either.
SPEAKER_01What did you do? I tried to squat a thousand pounds. That's what happened. Woo! Why you want to fight? Just good lord. A scorpion. He fired up. Jeez.
SPEAKER_04Bill asks Doc, you know, kind of if he's ever seen these cruises kind of put a little juice back in a in a long married couple's relationship. And he's like, Well, you know what they say. C air makes men viral. Gordon jumps like, that's an old wives' tale. And Doc's like, who would know better?
SPEAKER_01So really good, really good doc episode in minimal use this week. So I love what what he said was based, like, not based on medicine at all. Not at all.
SPEAKER_03He's just broken.
SPEAKER_01He's just gabbing. You know, that's salt air. What? What about salt air, sir? Jeez. It's science. What do you what are you less doctor? More shaman? Like, what do you do? What are we doing?
SPEAKER_04He's more, he's more like Robert Goulet.
SPEAKER_01So odd. C air.
SPEAKER_04Isaac comes in with an important question. Could I be a werewolf? And with that, Bill's like, alright, I'll see you later, Doc. Yeah. I got enough, I got enough crap going on.
SPEAKER_01This would have been and that would have been a perfect uh commercial break right there, by the way. Just uh in my eye.
SPEAKER_04This ended up being a pretty long scene in the doctor's office, honestly. Not since they not since they killed Barbie Benton's boyfriend. So Isaac is taking the thought that what Janet was saying could have actually happened, and then he's a Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, and when he goes to bed, you know, he's he's like splitting his personalities or getting up and doing these these horrible things. But wasn't it didn't happen during work hours? Yeah, I don't think there was a timestamp on it. Yeah, Isaac didn't put a lot of thought in any of this.
SPEAKER_01What are you talking about?
SPEAKER_04And then Isaac Isaac says something like, you know, I've been forgetting a lot of stuff lately, which I guess is the limes. Is that why they did the limes?
SPEAKER_01That's funny. Yeah, yeah, that's funny.
SPEAKER_04From Remember the Limes.
unknownThat's funny.
SPEAKER_04Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Lyme. Uh Doc asks if this has ever happened before, and Isaac says, No. But I wonder if I'm acting out his his schoolboy crush, I guess, on Janet, which again, first grade. A little weird. I'm sure I had a crush in first grade, but I don't think it would manifest itself into potentially assaulting someone I'd never seen.
SPEAKER_01I have a first grade boy. There's it is it is impossible.
SPEAKER_04He says he was a drug. This is when Isaac has really this is when Isaac has given Doc reason to sit him down. I think Isaac was gonna get his head split open at this point.
SPEAKER_01Isaac needs a vacation.
SPEAKER_04He explains it was a play and Doc is relaxed. Well, I mean, last vacation he went on was on the boat.
SPEAKER_01That's what I'm saying. These guys never get away.
SPEAKER_04You know what Isaac needs, Mike? You know what Isaac needs? It's the same thing Julie needs. He's gonna get laid. It's been a dry, it's been a dry cruise for those two this season.
SPEAKER_01No romantic interludes.
SPEAKER_04Exactly. And you can see it's it's manifesting itself in horrible ways.
SPEAKER_01I mean he's attacking when he's asleep now. That's how bad it's getting. Yeah.
SPEAKER_04Ultimately, Doc is gonna go talk to the husband. Because I think Doc, I think Doc figured this out. Because of course he did. Of course he did.
SPEAKER_01Of course he did.
SPEAKER_04I feel like if every episode at the beginning of the second act, they all just sat back in Subing's office and told him what's going on the boat. Doc could end all these episodes in like 14 minutes. That's crap.
SPEAKER_01That's crap. We'll have it wrapped up before the first commercial break. We'll be done. We'll have this sucker wrapped. She's not killing herself. He doesn't love you. He had his headphones on. Done. What's next?
SPEAKER_04Next episode. We did seven million episodes of the love bones. All right. Faye is ready to go out and has a pretty revealing outfit on, at least as far as Bill is concerned. And Bill wants no part of it. A lot of good stuff here from Gordon Jump about how you know she needs more insurance to go out like that because she'll catch cold and get pneumonia. He was good. I thought she was gonna get mad.
SPEAKER_01I thought that was gonna happen. Like he was his lines were so good she was gonna get pissed and then feel mad and you know all that.
SPEAKER_04It's funny. They they did a I don't think the Faye character was prickly good or bad. You know, it was fine. It didn't overstay its welcome, it could have. But the they they thread the needle here pretty well in terms of she she did acknowledge that he's been cool with all this stuff, but now he's not, you know, so she was being unrealistic, but not completely unrealistic. So that makes sense. But she said that she was gonna go out for dancing in her in her skimpy outfit, and she storms out.
SPEAKER_01The the part of Faye Pierremont was begging to be somebody else because Gordon Jump was so good in this episode. Yeah. You know, they and they didn't give him a ton, but he was just he executed so well.
SPEAKER_04I feel like he needed there was more room. There was more room there, and it's funny, I thought she was really good as nebish Faye, but I don't think she had the I don't think she had the juice on the other end of it. Or she should have played it more conflicted.
SPEAKER_01Or it shouldn't have played it just like a Phyllis Diller over the top with this new I agree.
SPEAKER_04Yes, you know what? You're 100% right because Phyllis Diller, when she was not drunk, was right, was similar. You're right. Right. That would have been great. That's that's what that needed was just that level. Like a two, like a legit two different characters kind of thing. It was too simple. They didn't really get there.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. For a show that likes to paint with with a wide brush, this one I don't know why they didn't go that route, but we are in the Pirates Cove.
SPEAKER_04Where Doc is explaining the plot to Mr. Reeves. He realizes he's been real heel here, and he's gonna make sure that his wife understands all the loving she deserves. He also apologizes so the way they sell it is because he wronged her so that she deserves to have her jealousy plot uh realized? Like, does he think that that's some sort of like fetish play or something?
SPEAKER_01I don't know what it is, but first of all, he's he he listened to a total of two games.
SPEAKER_03Right that you saw and that you saw Mr.
SPEAKER_01Reeves is Dr. Reeves, okay? And let leave Dr. Reeves alone. Let him wait, he's a good provider.
SPEAKER_03Why is it Dr. Reeves? He just wanted to downplay the doctors. Oh, you decided it's Dr. Reeves?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, because it's he gotta be a doctor because he's got so much juice that he's married to this super famous model. You can't be Mr. Reeves and be just I'm gonna stay in my cabin and listen to hockey and basketball.
SPEAKER_04But if he's gonna be do you think that portable, do you think that portable radio was cheap?
SPEAKER_01Probably not. It wasn't so much the radio, it was the extra antenna that was attached to it. I think that's the most expensive part. This contraption everywhere. It was crazy.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, I think that was the machine that Dick Martin was doing the the sexual testing on.
SPEAKER_01It could have been, or the one Gary Collins invented. The internet version of that. Yeah.
SPEAKER_04Mr. Reeves has a plan. To your point, why couldn't he just tell his wife? No, he can't just tell his wife. He's got a plan. He's gonna involve Isaac if Isaac's down for it, and he is. Come on, Dr.
SPEAKER_01Reeves. You know? Just tell her. Shoot.
SPEAKER_04I believe that scene ended with Clifton Davis saying, now dig this, which I hope was a breadcrumb fan service for That's My Mama project. I hope so. Who knows? Maybe we'll maybe we'll watch. Oh, it was a prequel for Amen.
SPEAKER_01Did he say uh dig this on Amen a lot?
SPEAKER_04I don't remember. It would be a weird thing for a minister to say.
SPEAKER_01Everybody needs a catchphrase. You know what's weird is I remember that Amen show, and I never quite understood as a kid what a deacon was. I'm like, I don't really fully understand what Sherman Hemsley's doing. Because the last time I saw him, he was running a dry cleaner, and now he's a deacon.
SPEAKER_04Well, the last deacon I saw confuse me. The last deacon I saw was a rock star. So I'm really not sure now.
SPEAKER_01So yeah. Wait, didn't we have Deacon Jones?
SPEAKER_04No, we had Rosie Greer.
SPEAKER_01Rosie Greer, Deacon Jones. Right, Deacon Dark. Completely different guys, Deacon, Deacon Jones. Yeah. Anyway, sorry.
SPEAKER_04All right, Bill tracks down Faye and tries to. Cover her up, but that doesn't work. He's basically got her in like a tarp. Like it's just so the Piermonts, the Piermonts start to bicker, but this doesn't really feel like a fight. Like I said, they're both just kind of whatever. They're happy.
SPEAKER_01I thought she was gonna get pissed.
SPEAKER_04No, I think they're I think that's the I don't give them this much credit, but like ultimately they didn't need whatever this was to be happy, you know. So they just love each other, Mike, and that's happiness enough. That's all the Pierremonts need. Kathy and Tom are on the deck, and Kathy still doesn't know what she wants to do. Jesus, there's your answer, Tom.
SPEAKER_01So it's not hey, just enough, Tom. Just go, just come on.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, it's kind of a I mean, I've only proposed once. It was a yes. So I feel like it's kind of a yes no.
SPEAKER_01It's not like a yeah, it's a five-day cruise.
SPEAKER_04It's not like do I need a light jacket?
SPEAKER_01Like it's if it's anything other than a resounding yes, I don't know if you can ask a second time.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, and if you hesitate, you better not have heard me. Am I stuttering?
SPEAKER_01Like you heard me the first time. That's right. Don't make me repeat it. Make me look like a dummy. Go ahead.
SPEAKER_04Tom's tired of waiting around, and he kind of wants that answer, and he he kind of lays it out. He's like, I can't be with you if you're not looking to move forward. I need to know where I stand. Needy much? Jeez, come on. Kathy cares too much about what people think. And then this is where she says, I'm an old woman, and you're a kinky fling, is what people will think. Buttermind's made up, and that's the end of that. And they do the thing which I have done a version of this, I think, where it's like you break up and you know it's done, and you're in the moment, but one of you has clearly decided that it's done. So is it weird to have this sad moment about what you did?
SPEAKER_00So that's funny.
SPEAKER_01That's funny.
SPEAKER_04Oh, I can't believe I killed this thing.
SPEAKER_01So yeah, that's funny.
SPEAKER_04Alright, Act 4, the Piermonts are wrapping up dinner. Bill forgot his pipe, so he's gonna go back to the cabin to grab that.
SPEAKER_01It's my kind of cruise. What are we talking about? What's Bill about to do up in the what's going on? Be a liberal cruise.
SPEAKER_04It's just a lead pipe. Faye promised that she'll keep the wrap on until Gordon Jump meets her up on the deck with his pipe. But as soon as he gets up there, this is this is the best part of the whole storyline. As soon as she gets up there, shizzing, she gets great. That was great.
SPEAKER_01The whole thing goes dark like the last Sopranos episode, and that's it for the whole season of Love Boat.
SPEAKER_04The Silk Al knocks on Janet's door with a special Mariachi's and Margaritas. Gopher's outside the door. Can't tell if he's like listening to protect somebody, or what of course Gladys and yeah, Gladys and Agnes show up and gopher's like, oh, I'm keeping everybody safe and all that kind of stuff. But of course, he's there to hear everything.
SPEAKER_01I'm assuming she did say drop everything and go back to the street. That is true.
SPEAKER_04That is true. That is true. So Gopher overhears Isaac starting up the plot that him and Clifton Davis have worked up, which is basically like Isaac's gonna make a play, Clifton Davis will show up, they'll pretend to fight. She gets her jealousy fetish end scene. Gopher hears all this and starts to worry, and then Mr. Reeves comes in, which is all part of the plan, but Gopher thinks that he's gonna kill Isaac, so he calls Doc. Of course, none of that is true. Mr. Reeves and Isaac were in on it the whole time, and while they get Janet to admit that she was making it all up, they still go overboard a little bit, and Isaac even does some basically some hackneyed Shakespeare to kind of make her feel better about herself. I guess I don't really know why they had to do all that, but it was fine. Me neither. That was a weird, that was an odd weird story. Yeah, it was a story. Yeah, it was weird, and again, it was like just wasn't a lot there. So, but I'm okay. If you're gonna err on the side of giving Isaac more to do, that's fine. Thousand percent. But yeah, not the greatest thing. The the funny thing was to do, but yeah, I'll take it.
SPEAKER_01But this just there's nothing here. There's no meeting story at all.
SPEAKER_04There was no gravitas to it, right? It was just silly, like so.
SPEAKER_01And I'm fine with silly sometimes. I just when Isaac evolved, I just want a little more.
SPEAKER_04Well, right, and it's like, okay, so your only storylines without looking, I'm pretty sure his only storylines this season were the Rosie Greer one, which was kind of similar to this a little bit, and then this, but like again, no relationship, no serious thing. Like, so unless they're saving it for the season finale, who knows? 90 minutes, we got a lot to do. Alright, well, that that's really the end of that. Mr. Reeves is forgiven, I guess. Man, it all worked out. I'm skipping a lot of this because that's not really there. Yeah, exactly. I mean, that's that's the point. Nothing really happens.
SPEAKER_01It the same thing happened when you get off the boat that happened when you got on it. It's just weird. Like, there's just yeah, it was such a strange in a panic.
SPEAKER_04Gopher had called Doc on the PA. Doc shows up, he knows what's actually happening, so he kind of blows it off. In fact, he was mad that he got called from his bingo game, which I'm assuming was not bingo. It wasn't bingo, yeah. No, chess. Gopher says, You call yourself a healer. So up the ante to Fay's nonsense, and he shows up in his skivvies on the deck. Yeah, good for the sock guarders making a return. That offends Gladys, of course. Faye says clearly that the new way of life is is agreeing with with the both of them, and they're off to slip into something more comfortable.
SPEAKER_03Great.
SPEAKER_01Act five kind of petered out here. They lost because the 'cause the end of the episode wasn't there was not a lot going on, so the end of the episode there was no like well, yeah, except for one scene which I don't even understand.
SPEAKER_04So Julie and Vicky say bye-bye to the Piermonts who feel like new men and women in two different ways. Whatever. I don't I don't either. I didn't get that. Like, what? Stubing tells Gladys and Agnes that they're ended up not being any sex maniac after all, and that you should join us on another cruise. And Andy Davis and the best lines like, why? She was upset about this.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, right.
SPEAKER_04Okay. Explain the scene to me. Kathy asked Julie if she's seen Tom. Julie, who in previous episodes has never divulged information to the point where she would be like, I have to let the your booking agent know, or something like that. No, he just got off. In fact, he was the first one off the ship. Julie was probably looking.
SPEAKER_01Oh, she went away on the Hoff. Yeah.
SPEAKER_04Yeah. So the the Hoff shows back up, perfect timing, and he shows up with these old people. And he's like, Oh, you know, these people have been married 47 years, and the wife, Mike, is 11 years older than the husband.
SPEAKER_01Oh. Oh, so she's what, 91 and he's 80? Does it really matter at that point? I mean, come on. This is the worst example. This is exact she's like, this is exactly what I'm talking about. And these two. You are dumb, Tom. He's a he's he he works on the copiers. He's not a lawyer. He's a dumb. Like you just you just made my case for me, and Kathy leaves alone.
SPEAKER_04Not only are they 11 years difference in age, they're Tom's grandparents, Mike. And somehow local plus this week.
SPEAKER_01Jeez.
SPEAKER_04That works, I guess.
SPEAKER_01I they just happen to be in the parking lot.
SPEAKER_04He called ahead. He did say he called ahead.
SPEAKER_01He called ahead to do what?
SPEAKER_04Well, I don't know what that proves. Like, I don't know what that proves. That they stayed together. Like, I don't think she was worried about them staying together. I think she was worried about them being at a movie theater and kids laughing at the grandmother making out with the son. Like, I mean, basically.
SPEAKER_01Where she couldn't think of a reason to say no, like other than to just go to this.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, now she's got to say no with these grandparents here.
SPEAKER_01So they're not even that's not Tom's grandparents. He just paid some rando people in the parking lot. He had to like fight against stream to get them back. I'm like, that's irresponsible in and of itself, Tom.
SPEAKER_04What if there's a fire? Kid, go to the local nursing home and find me two old. You've got it, Michael. Just yeah, I just gopher is shocked, shocked that Isaac isn't dead at the hands of Mr. Reeves. The Reeves stopped by to say thanks, and Mr. Reeves even gives Isaac that giant radio with the big antenna. Gopher can't understand it. But Isaac says open marriage. And that's the end of this episode.
SPEAKER_01Which was it in like a lion and out like a lamb? I don't even know if it came in like a lion, but it definitely went out like a lamb. Jeez.
SPEAKER_04It's been a while since I've had one where it just got worse as I took the notes and was and it's like it's just because there was nothing there. And when you when we talk about it, you really can see there's just nothing there. Even the stuff I like, there's just nothing there.
SPEAKER_01That's what I'm saying. In the terms of like, it's hard to go, well, was it a good episode or was it a bad episode? It's weird. It existed. Like it existed. What a weird episode for the the episode, the last episode before the season finale. What a just an odd episode.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, but I mean, let's think back. So the first season was the worst episode of the year, it was the one right before the finale. That was the Funichello. Last season, it was 49 was the a good one. It was the World War II with the French plane guy. Oh, that was actually a good one. We liked that one. Jerry Stiller, Charo, that was a good one. This was kind of in the middle. It had it's funny, it had elements of of both in that it had people we knew, people we liked, but it also had a lot of nothing. So well, we're halfway into totals in a recap, but yeah, King of the Hill, best one right now is the Cowboy Two Parter, and then we have all the ones that we've talked about being bad. But yeah, I don't know. It's either lower middle, probably. Yeah, it's just kind of there. It's funny. I said this a few weeks ago about how it's just been a very unremarkable, very unmemorable for the most part. Yeah. And then I was listening back to an early season episode, and I said the almost exact same thing, and I think that's where I'm landing. Now, this will be a little more memorable because we know the actors, but just very I feel like we're gonna look back, we're gonna try and pull a reference from this season off the top of our heads, and we're gonna have trouble because a lot of these episodes are just gonna blend into each other.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, it's it's I do agree. Yeah, weird.
SPEAKER_04Would you rather have really, really bad or these kind of bland, boring ones? Like obviously you want to mix, but I don't know what's worse in the end.
SPEAKER_01At least with a really bad one, it's it's like a commitment to something. You know what I mean? Or at least it's it's something. But I just feel like it's more egregious to just have a like the director of this episode at the end, they look at it and go, huh. Like you know what I mean? Like it's just like it's yeah, comedic.
SPEAKER_04Well, and it's also like sometimes we can there's nothing here. Well, and I think sometimes we've we've been able to like pick apart maybe one bad storyline and kind of say, Oh, if they had just done a little bit of this or you know this. And I think there's tweaks here, but there just wasn't a lot here. Like you're missing, like you're just missing another part of the episode. I mean, Clifton Davis never left the cabin, like there should have been more there, like and to your point. I didn't really think about well, that's fair. Yeah, that's definitely fair, yeah.
SPEAKER_01So but uh because for for some of these people it felt like it was a five-day cruise, but to your point about Clifton Davis, they they didn't show enough things happening to warrant them saying it was a five-day cruise. I don't know why you'd sort of do that to yourself.
SPEAKER_04And this seems this seems ridiculous because I just watched it and wrote notes on it, but right where did the time actually go? Like, where did the time go?
SPEAKER_01There's no captain's table, right? There's a lot of Acapulco lounge, there was no mirror. There wasn't a dance scene. Not a heavy pirate's cove like last week with the guy with the crutches and all that.
SPEAKER_04There was, I will say this, not enough that I wrote it down because it wasn't that egregious, but there was a lot more of the padding shots than we've seen in a while. So I think they maybe just yeah, you just didn't have a lot, and then there was just a lot of a lot of Faye Piedmont threatening to kill herself and throwing clothes over the deck, which wasn't it wasn't an A storyline.
SPEAKER_01I just said I was gonna do this. Yeah, no, no, no, but allude to it again for the next 20 minutes.
unknownRidiculous, man.
SPEAKER_04Captain of the week.
SPEAKER_01Captain of the week's gotta be going to Gordon Jump as Bill Piermont, just from just from dealing and not losing his getting upset. He was very supportive and showed his wife that she was taking it a bit far. I just like the way he handled it. Yeah. Character and Gordon Jump was was great.
SPEAKER_04It was just nice to see Gordon Jump do Gordon Jump things. Like that was just fun.
SPEAKER_01It's reassuring. You know what I mean? It's like, okay. What if what if this episode didn't have Gordon Jump?
SPEAKER_04That's what I oh right. That's what I mean. Like, if you just had the cast from last week, right, where we didn't know anybody, yeah, right? Same thing. This would be death because I feel like the knowing of people helped a little bit.
SPEAKER_01Like 100%. I I think that was most of it. Captain Davis, David Haslov, Gordon Jump, Andy Davis, even though in limited mode. Even Bernadette Stannis. I mean, even it was the same thing. We know all these people.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, I I think this might be a script. I think this might be a script and casting. This was definitely behind the camera problems this week.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, I agree. I agree. I think you had you had the right people to make something happen, but they just didn't.
SPEAKER_04I I do feel like I've come down a little bit on it. The first watch, Hasselhoff just blew me off the page. Like it was just like it was so nice to see a young, yeah, not insane, not cartoony. Like you see why Knight Rider hired him, right? Like you see exactly what it is. And I think that carried through. I do think that the storyline died about halfway through, which, you know, they just didn't have they didn't have another move. They should have had maybe she should have been looking another woman, or he should have met another woman or something like that, but it was just like everything felt like we only have these actors for one day and we only have one set. Like like we gotta do everything right here.
SPEAKER_01Well, and it's funny because I think that thing that Kathy and Tom Bell, if Tom Bell was gonna look like David Hasselhoff, but not have the confidence of it would be interesting if he was the he was the other woman. And that's why Kathy was doing this. I mean, you could have done a lot of different things here, but I agree. Another thing I just thought of you had you had Kit, you had Night Rider this week, and we had Street Hawk last week. What's next week? What are we getting? Blue Thunder next week? Come on.
SPEAKER_04Oh man. Wow, how about that? Yeah, and we'll find out we're gonna have next week in about three minutes here. So that's true. Worst of the week, walk the blank.
SPEAKER_01That's I would say just Faye Piermont with the with the you know, no one needs to tease suicide for as long as she did. It I have to pick her, but I I don't know. I mean, Anby Davis didn't do anything, but I don't know if that's bad. Yeah, I'm gonna go with Faye Piermont in this one.
SPEAKER_04I guess I'll go with like the Gladys role because it wasn't as good as ones we've seen previously, but I think the more I think about it, it's just the the script. The behind the scenes, I'll just call the behind the scenes of it. The pr the production of this one was it did fail the actors. You're a hundred percent right. You're a hundred percent right. There's room in there, there's no reason. And it's funny because like we've seen what was the one with it's the one we like actually with Jane Wyman and Audrey Meadows, yeah, and it's just like that one was all acting, the script stunk. So it was it this was like a lesser version of that where the acting wasn't great, but the actors we liked, but the script still stunk, you know.
SPEAKER_01So and ultimately in a world like that kills you and jump still looked good, yeah.
SPEAKER_04You know, yeah. Well, that's yeah, exactly. And I do wonder that's where I wonder if it's like, did they write that for Gordon Jump, or does Gordon Jump just do Gordon Jump stuff with whatever's written, right? The It seemed very Gordon Jump like, to be honest with you. It did, yeah. So Tolls and a recap for this week.
SPEAKER_01Plugs, Hidden Season Patreon, Absolutely Hammered. Whether you're cheering from the stamps or tuning in from home, this is the podcast you need. So grab your bat, your cap, and your Philly's pride, crack open a beer, and enjoy a weekly Phillies Happy Hour with Chris Jones, Justin Clue, and her very own Mike Robertson. Check out Absolutely Hammered on the Hitting Season Patreon. You can find us everywhere and anywhere you find your audio podcast. Please hit that subscribe button, leave a review. You can also check out our video podcast on YouTube. You can find us on Instagram and Facebook. Look for reels and updates. No mail this week, Mike. No mail means means no sound effect.
SPEAKER_04Well, it's a holiday. It is a holiday. We just got done Easter, yeah.
SPEAKER_01So that is true. Next week, Mike, as I started the notes for this, we are on the season finale. Let me just give you some of our uh heavy hitters. Daisy Duke. Oh, wow. Helen Hayes? Really? Yeah. James MacArthur? Oh, I know he's back.
SPEAKER_04Yeah. A lot of pressure. A lot of pressure on James MacArthur because there's a stubby waiting for him if he doesn't screw it up. Well, it's either him or Sidney. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01So Martin Short. Martin Short. And finally, Mr. Larry Wilcox, who I will tell you, he and Eric Estrada did not get along. We'll talk about that more next episode. Did not get along. So yeah. Big season end of season three.
SPEAKER_04Is there anything you is there anything you want? I feel like we always ask this right before the last. Is there anything you want to get in before the season ends from that episode?
SPEAKER_01Like Yeah, I would love to see.
SPEAKER_04I think I would really like to see Julie go out on a on a good note. Like I'd like to see Julie just have a good last episode. Like bookend it better, right?
SPEAKER_01So I almost wish Round Mouth was back for this one.
SPEAKER_04It's been a weird season. It is a weird season. It's been a weird it's been a weird season. And with 90 minutes, okay, here's the question. Do we get an Alaska reference on that episode? I want to say yes.
SPEAKER_01I say no. Okay.
unknownOkay.
SPEAKER_01I hope not.
SPEAKER_04I hope not too. But yeah, I don't know. I don't feel as bad as I did a few weeks ago because these episodes, that's the thing. These episodes these last couple episodes have at least like stemmed the tide. I do feel like if next week is good, we will feel good about the season. And next week is bad, we will feel bad about the season. And if next week's in the middle, I don't know what we do with that.
SPEAKER_01So but it is weird. And and I think that w as we're doing that stubbies prep, it's the perfect time to sort of digest the season as a whole. Right. Because there's definitely highs and there's definitely lows. And as I'm doing my research, I almost feel like I have a better grasp. Because I think generally season three. Well, I'll save it for the stubbies, but it's interesting. There were definitely ebbs and flows this season.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_01And I I completely expect a solid episode. I don't like that they're doing 90 minutes. Like, don't there's no need to load the deck for the season finale to 90. Let's keep it a tight 44-minute episode. Like, don't get crazy here. Because there's only one extra storyline.
SPEAKER_04I just I wonder what the time kill will be. There's always music or like a chase or a dance scene or something in these longer ones. I wonder what it'll be. I just don't know if it's necessary.
SPEAKER_01So what if it's gonna be Daisy Duke? Then then what I guess theoretically Fantasy Island would be 90 minutes.
SPEAKER_04They've done that. Well they've done early, right? They've done the double nineties. So oh then yeah, that's probably gonna be a double ninety, then. Yeah. So two nineties in a night. That's a big deal. I mean, I don't mind them ending if they land it, but it's like, and then of course, no, I think this probably has to do with the strike and everything, but like the season premiere next year is a single episode, but then we have two of the next three weeks are two parties. So we're gonna be right in the mix when we start next year.
SPEAKER_01Going up against just movies just constantly, too.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, I'll be curious to see how that how that all plays out, too. But we'll talk about that a lot more probably in the season premiere. Yeah, once I start to do some research on what the hell happened with that thing. But it's the fact that it starts in late October gives me concern about some holiday episodes, but we'll see.
SPEAKER_01So they're gonna get us again for Christmas, aren't they?
SPEAKER_04No, I think we do. I think we do actually get a Christmas episode this year. Okay. So and not just an us Christmas episode.
SPEAKER_01So but we'll always make it happen.
SPEAKER_04But that'll wrap up the penultimate episode of season three. Hard to believe that next week will be our final one of season three, which basically puts us one-third done on the project, which is crazy to think about that we have so much behind us and even more ahead of us.
SPEAKER_01It's almost intimidating. What are we what are we at at two years now?
SPEAKER_04Nah, we started in this late spring, early summer of twenty-three. So we're three years in. We're about three years in on three years, yeah. So we got another six years plus whatever that last season is, yeah.
SPEAKER_01Wow. I'm gonna be eighty-seven years old when I'm done. It's gonna be amazing. Those episodes are gonna be real barn burners.
SPEAKER_04And I'll be ten years younger, you kinky freak.
SPEAKER_02So all right.
SPEAKER_04Well, that's it for for this one. An interesting episode, one we'll probably not remember much about in the future, but at least we have what, two and a half hours to talk about it tonight.
SPEAKER_01So always time to talk about something like this.
SPEAKER_04Thanks, Mike. Thanks everybody for listening, and we will talk to you for the season finale next time.