Antidepressants Steal Your Sexuality and Humanity | Cael's Story of PSSD & Psych Med Harm

What happens when the medication prescribed to help you ends up stealing fundamental aspects of your humanity? We sit down with Cael, a courageous 22-year-old who sought help for college anxiety at 19 and ended up trapped in a web of psychiatric medications that permanently altered his ability to feel emotions and experience physical pleasure. His story exposes the devastating reality of Post-SSRI Sexual Dysfunction, a condition that affects one in every 216 antidepressant users yet remains buried in medication inserts and dismissed by doctors.

Cael walks us through his journey from normal college adjustment anxiety to a cascade of psychiatric medications including Lexapro, Effexor, Zoloft, Cymbalta, and antipsychotics. Despite multiple doctors and genetic testing that promised personalized treatment, each medication brought new side effects that were blamed on "underlying conditions." The emotional numbness and sexual dysfunction that followed have left him feeling disconnected from family, friends, and romantic relationships during what should be the peak years of his life.

We explore how international health agencies recognize PSSD while the FDA continues to minimize these life-altering risks. Kale's experience reveals the urgent need for true informed consent and the courage required for young people to speak out against a system that failed them. His story serves as both a warning and a call to action for better protection of vulnerable patients seeking mental health care.

If you've experienced similar effects or know someone who has, this episode provides validation and resources for understanding what might really be happening. Subscribe for more whistleblowing conversations that challenge the psychiatric establishment and share this episode to help others connect the dots in their own medication journeys.

What happens when the medications meant to help actually take away your ability to feel joy, love, and connection? In this raw and eye-opening episode of The Gaslit Truth Podcast, we sit down with Cael, a brave 22-year-old who sought help for anxiety at 19—only to be caught in a devastating cycle of overmedication, misdiagnosis, and permanent side effects.

➡️ Watch as Kale shares his story of emotional numbness, loss of sexual function, and betrayal by a system that promised healing. From Lexapro to Zoloft to antipsychotics, Kale’s journey shin

Chapters

• 0:00 Episode Introduction and Guest Welcome
• 3:04 Kale's Story: From Anxiety to Antidepressants
• 9:56 Multiple Medications and Worsening Side Effects
• 21:48 Discovering PSSD and Finding Answers
• 32:05 Understanding Post-SSRI Sexual Dysfunction
• 40:21 College Life and Social Impact
• 43:42 Present Day Reality and Relationships

Transcript

Jennifer Schmitz: 0:22

Well, hey, everyone, you were never told that sexual side effects would be the result of taking an antidepressant, even after you stop. We are your whistleblowing shrinks, Dr Terralyn and therapist Jen, and you have landed yourself on the Guess the Truth podcast. Today, we have a very special guest that is on the show, Cale Mecham Cale. Welcome to the show.

Cael Mecham: 0:43

Thank you.

Jennifer Schmitz: 0:44

Yeah, let's tell everybody a little bit about you.

Teralyn Sell: 0:46

Hold on, wait, wait, wait. Before we get started, I wanted to do the little disclaimer.

Cael Mecham: 0:50

Oh, all right.

Teralyn Sell: 0:51

So yeah, we are going to be talking about yeah, we're going to be talking about some adult sexual things, using body parts and language and things like that, so-.

Jennifer Schmitz: 1:01

Big words.

Teralyn Sell: 1:01

Big words, big words. If that's not your jam, then this isn't your episode, but if it is, please stay here, because I think it's stuff you need to hear.

Jennifer Schmitz: 1:08

I think this is the. Let's talk about sex baby. Let's talk about you and me.

Teralyn Sell: 1:13

We'll put that in a deliverable for you? Yes, Okay, everybody.

Jennifer Schmitz: 1:17

So let's talk about who Kale is here with us. Kale's here to share his experience with psychiatric medication harm and to speak out about post-SSRI sexual dysfunction, which is a condition that's extremely devastating. It's life-altering and it's still widely unacknowledged by the medical community. When Cale was 19, he sought help for anxiety and what followed of that was years of being prescribed powerful medications without proper warnings, informed consent or follow-up. So he is here to share his story, to raise awareness of PSSD and to push for real accountability from the pharmaceutical industries, the medical system and the institutions that ignore the lasting damage that these drugs cause people. So welcome to the show, cale.

Cael Mecham: 2:00

Yeah, thank you.

Jennifer Schmitz: 2:02

So how'd you get here? Tell us a little bit about how you connected and are sitting here in front of us.

Cael Mecham: 2:08

Yeah, so through the PSSD network they contacted me and I volunteered to be willing to speak about it.

Teralyn Sell: 2:17

That's really courageous because, I just want to point out you guys, cale's only 22 years old, so he's talking about this stuff in the heat of a college experience which to me, is like the heightened peak of your sexuality is during college, and so I would like to start by just sharing your story, if you wouldn't mind, just starting from the beginning of when you were first prescribed.

Cael Mecham: 2:44

Yeah, so back when I was 19, I had experienced some anxiety after moving out of my home. I was kind of living on my own for the first time, and so what comes with that is kind of like you know, a sense of anxiety, right. And I started like just feeling overwhelmed, just like having like anxiety attacks, and just not figure. Like I couldn't figure out what the issue was. I kind of knew, but I was like I might need some help, like I'd been working out like trying to like relieve some stress and it just wasn't getting any better for me. So I went to my doctor my childhood pediatrician, and I told him kind of I was experiencing anxiety.

Cael Mecham: 3:27

I had heard from my sister of some medication that might help with anxiety. But I kind of just told him what I was experiencing and he was like, well, there's this medication that works really well for helping with anxiety and it's genuinely well tolerated. And he told me about Lexapro. And so he started me out on Lexapro and he said, like just take it and your anxiety will start getting better, it'll improve. It might take a while, but it will improve. And I filled the prescription and then from there, I remember the first day I took it, I felt like euphoric, like I felt like super elated, like I felt really good.

Teralyn Sell: 4:13

Yeah, you were manic, by the way, that was mania.

Cael Mecham: 4:15

Yeah, yeah, I was like I feel really good. I was like I'm so glad I remember like calling my mom and I was like I feel so good. Like I went to my doctor and I started some medication and I just like it's the best I've ever felt in a long time and I just kept taking it and over the following weeks, like I noticed like changes in my behavior, like I just wanted to be alone, like I just wanted to be isolated, and I started feeling down, like I was depressed Even though I've, like I've had moments of sadness, but like never like depressed or like I couldn't like really function, you know, and I wasn't told like any side effects, like he didn't tell me anything of what to expect from taking Lexapro and what came from that was just like like suicidal thoughts and like just feeling down, and prior to Lexapro, I'd never been suicidal ever in my life. And so, um, I was like what is going on? You know, I was like I couldn't figure out what the issue was because I never knew it could be from the medication. You know, I was like maybe I'm just stressed out, living on my own for the first time that's causing me to feel this way and um, so I just kept taking it and it just kept getting worse.

Cael Mecham: 5:24

And so I texted my stepmom she's a pediatric nurse practitioner and she told me to contact my doctor and kind of tell him the side effects I was experiencing. What I told her, and he told me that I was experiencing symptoms of depression and that he needed to up the dose of Lexapro to the maximum dosage of 20 milligrams and that he was going to be adding Effexor. I think it was at like 75 milligrams. And so I started on, yeah, effexor, and I started getting more side effects, like, just like sweating excessively, and then the sexual side effects kind of started becoming more prominent. I started noticing them a lot more. Um, and then I I called the doctor again, I met with him and I told him kind of like the sexual side effects that I was experiencing, like delayed orgasm, uh, feeling like, um, just like feeling spaced out. And he told me like that, like that's just expected to be with the medication, like sexual side effects are to be expected on an antidepressant. And so I was like, okay, that's fine, I guess for now, like well, I'm taking the medication, I can deal with it, it's tolerable. So I just kept taking the medicine. I thought it was my like anxiety that was, and depression that he was telling me about that was making me feel this way. And then just the sexual side effects were from the medication that I found out.

Cael Mecham: 6:50

So then I took it for another year and a half and it just never got better. Things started getting worse and I just decided to stop it on my own, just cold turkey both of them, because my friends were telling me they're like Kale, like you're acting really different, like you just seem different, like something's wrong, you know. And I was like, yeah, like they started telling me like kind of the different shifts in my personality and like just how I was acting. So I decided just to stop it. And I was fine for a while, but I still had like, like ideations and wasn't feeling very well. And I was fine for a while, but I still had like ideations and wasn't feeling very well and I didn't know anything about withdrawal. I didn't know you could withdraw from antidepressants and so, but I didn't really experience any severe like withdrawal symptoms that a lot of people report at that time. And so I waited a couple more months being off the medication.

Cael Mecham: 7:44

So I waited a couple more months being off the medication and then I went to a therapist at my college and I told the therapist what I was experiencing and they told me that I needed to get on a medication, that it's obvious that I need help. So I went to a psychiatrist at a local hospital. I told him everything that had happened and he said I just hadn't tried the right antidepressant, that there was another antidepressant that was well-tolerated and it's called Zoloft. And he said we'll start you at 25 milligrams, but the therapeutic dose is 50. So take it for a few weeks at 25, and then up yourself to 50 milligrams, and then we'll just stay from there and see how things go. So I just started taking it and the we'll just stay from there and see how things go.

Cael Mecham: 8:26

So I just I started taking it and the same things with lexaprone effects are happened. Um, I just tolerated it as long as I could and then, um, I just couldn't take it anymore, like he he just wasn't listening to me, like I couldn't, he wouldn't guide me on getting off the medication, and so I stopped that one cold turkey as well and I felt good, like I felt on the antidepressants. I felt very emotionally numb, like just like more blunted, like I wasn't as reactive to like my emotions and I just was sick of feeling that way because I knew it was from the medication, so I just stopped Zoloft. Feeling that way because I knew it was from the medication, so so I just stopped Zoloft and, um, within a few weeks, I started like getting more down, like feeling very like agitated, um, and I found out like it's symptoms of like akathisia, like where you can't just like sit still, like you got to move all the time, um, and then also insomnia, like I couldn't sleep for a long time, just like more than three hours a night.

Teralyn Sell: 9:27

Can I, can I stop? I want to. Yeah, I want to stop the the uh history here for a second, because you had said that you didn't know any of this stuff before, and now you're talking very much like you know a lot of it, do you? Where was that moment for you that you were like know a lot of it, Do you? Where was that moment for you that you were like this is wrong, something's up with me, and I need to search somewhere for a different answer, like when did that start? Because, cause, now you've got all the language right, you have all the experiential language that you need to describe your experience. Um, where did that come in for you?

Teralyn Sell: 10:05

Cause nobody was really helping you find it.

Cael Mecham: 10:07

They're all like you know. Yeah, it was probably within like the last year. So, after stopping Zoloft and then experiencing withdrawal, I kept going to doctors trying to figure out what was going on. I got put on another antidepressant, um, and then an antipsychotic, and, um, I stopped those. After a few weeks I just had terrible side effects, like my hair started falling out, like thinning, and just just lots, lots of side effects. So I stopped, I was off it for probably another four months, just couldn't sleep.

Cael Mecham: 10:42

And then, um, my mom, well, my, my stepmom and my dad were like you're too anxious, like this is out of control, like, and I was like I'm experiencing withdrawal, like from the medication, and they wouldn't listen to me. And my, my uncle's a nurse, psychiatrist and he, uh, he had me take something called a gene site test, so it basically takes a swab from your mouth and it sees what genes, like if you're a good metabolizer, or certain antidepressants. So, um, the test results came back and they said Cymbalta was a perfect match for me, that I would metabolize it very well and that it would be well tolerated. So I started, he, I told him about the side effects I'd experienced, and so he was like it seems like you're sensitive, so we'll start you on a low dose. So I started on 20 milligrams of Cymbalta and within I would say about a day or two, like I knew something was wrong, like I just felt numb, like I had on other antidepressants, but like I couldn't even feel sad, like I couldn't even feel sad, like I, uh, I couldn't feel any emotions. Um, and then I also noticed like my genitals had became numb, like like even touching them I couldn't feel it and like I couldn't really get an erection, uh, I couldn't feel orgasms, and I I didn't know what was going on. I just thought like maybe this is like I knew it was from the medication, but I was like I experienced sexual dysfunction from the medication before and so I was like this is probably it's just a different antidepressant, so it's a different side effect. You know, like maybe this is just part of it, right?

Cael Mecham: 12:16

So I took that one for probably two months and then I, I got off it again and then things just it never got better. I got off it again and then things just never got better. Like I had erectile dysfunction, genital numbness, like emotional blunting, just lots of side effects, and it just nothing ever changed. I told my mom, my sorry, my stepmom and my dad about it and they just wouldn't listen to me, wouldn't listen to what I had to say. And so then I just kind of researched on my own and I found out about like PSSD. But to be diagnosed with PSSD by like the guidelines they set, you have to be off medication for three months and still be experiencing side effects. So it had been about, like I think, six or seven months and I was like I'm still experiencing these side effects. And that's when I knew like, like I've been lied to, like these medications aren't as safe as they say, like I was never told this was possible, so that's kind of Then you're mad, yeah, then you get.

Teralyn Sell: 13:21

Then you get mad and you get curious and you want to shout it from the rooftops.

Cael Mecham: 13:25

Yeah, you want to tell people about it so that it doesn't happen to others.

Jennifer Schmitz: 13:28

Yeah, yeah, so within this Kale, what's interesting is? It's hard to know, and I think a lot of our listeners that have been a victim of polypharmacy. Okay, I mean, you're talking about Lexapro and then Effexor and then Zoloft and then Cymbalta. I think I missed one too. There was another one.

Cael Mecham: 13:48

There's Pristique I was also on Pristique. Pristique, yes, okay, and a psychotic called quetiapine.

Jennifer Schmitz: 13:54

Okay, yes, okay, okay. So there's six different medications here, right, and the hard part of this is there is a thing called protracted withdrawal. There is a thing, when it comes to PSSD, which we're going to talk a little bit about, which is this can be coming. You don't know what came first with chicken or the egg in terms of all these medications. You could still be experiencing something from Lexapro, which was the very first drug, or Effexor, which was the second drug, which months or years later then pops as a sexual side effect, or it could be coming from the antipsychotic right Like so, when you the whole like diagnosable criteria of how you have to be off of a psychiatric medication for three months to be able to label somebody with this. Clearly, I have an opinion on that, because I think it's kind of a bunch of bullshit, because this could have been, this could have been part of that journey that started with those, that first medication, which you were experiencing.

Teralyn Sell: 14:48

Yeah, that's a really good call, jen.

Jennifer Schmitz: 14:53

You know what I mean, Like. So it's kind of one of those things where every time I hear something like that like if we look at your whole picture, that three months is arbitrary when you look at the trajectory of the meds and how long you were on them, Right? So I think it's worth pointing that out for people that are listening, because we get so stuck, I think, on the well, I've got to experience this for three months since I've been off the med. I think a lot of people All meds Off of these meds, right, all meds, yeah, yeah.

Jennifer Schmitz: 15:16

When, in reality, what we know is that protracted symptomology comes up for people even a year later after being off of med right. So I think that's an important space to just sit in for a sec. But the other thing I was hoping you could do, kale, is can you tell our listeners because you are I would say you are an expert right In PSSD. Okay, you are a lived expert within this and you also have you are sitting in front of us as part of a network that educates the world on this right. There are support groups on this. So could you give our listeners a little bit of information on what PSSD is and I know you've said a few symptoms that you've experienced but, in general, what is this, what does it stand for and how does it impact people?

Cael Mecham: 16:03

So yeah, PSSD stands for post SSRI sexual dysfunction. It can also apply to other antidepressants such as SNRIs, and it basically is just from. They don't know the exact cause, but it's just prolonged sexual dysfunction and like emotional numbness and a bunch of other side effects after you stop the medication.

Teralyn Sell: 17:32

So it's not just sexual side effects it's also the emotional numbing out of self right which, arguably, I would say, the majority of people experience. I did, for sure, and I never would have put that into the category of a sexual dysfunction, but it is sure a pleasure dysfunction, right? And so I've said this before about people. We are programmed for pleasure, and if we take pleasure away in all facets of our life, then what is it Then? What is this life that we're in Exactly? And you are I keep harping on this. I'm like you are in the throes of your collegiate experience, yes, which, if anyone goes to college, that's where you, that's where you have a lot of sexual experiences and a lot of sexual desires and all of that. So when I think of a young man like that in college, like what was that part emotionally like for you? Can you explain that? Like what did it mean? It wasn't just my, my, my junk isn't working anymore.

Teralyn Sell: 18:40

It's gotta be a little deeper than that.

Cael Mecham: 18:42

Like what was that like for you?

Teralyn Sell: 18:43

Yeah, yeah.

Cael Mecham: 18:44

Just immense loss Like um, there's no treatment, they don't know the exact cause. Um just like to lose your sexuality. Um is just very sad. You know Um, especially in college, right, like you want to date, you want to meet with people, like you want to have like sexual experiences, and it's just very sad to not be able to experience things the same as other people and just to touch on like the emotional numbing, like it goes beyond, just like like my emotions are blunted, like it's like I don't feel like love for like my family or like my parents or like my siblings, like I could go the rest of my life without talking to any of them and I wouldn't feel anything. So it's just like it's, yeah, a very big loss.

Teralyn Sell: 19:33

Yeah, like a wall, like I experience like it's a wall between you and everyone else.

Cael Mecham: 19:39

Yeah.

Teralyn Sell: 19:39

You know they're there, you know that you love them, but you don't feel you can't get past that wall to actually connect with that. And we're also talking about a time of your life developmentally with social interactions right, Like how to connect with people socially.

Teralyn Sell: 20:00

And this was only a few years ago, right, like how to connect with people socially, and this was only a few years ago, right? Well, you're still going through it right now, correct? Yes, but this started only a couple of years ago. So that is like your social cues, how you relate to other people. There's an emotional bond and emotional piece of this in stages of development that I think were probably also lost or you could consider being lost. So you, you know you're making up for that as you, as you age. Yeah, so how, how else did that impact your college experience socially, do you think?

Cael Mecham: 20:42

I just I can't connect with people very well anymore. I can still be friends with people, obviously, but it's just, it's not the same, you know, like the connection with others socially just is very changed. And then just, yeah, just feeling very disconnected with people, Like I've heard this said before where it's just like you almost don't feel human because it's like you lose your sexuality, lose your ability to feel emotions, so it's like you lose the fundamental part of being a human. You know.

Teralyn Sell: 21:13

Yeah, yes, oh gosh, there was something it was right on the tip of my tongue that I was going to ask you about, and I'll get there in a second. In a second you did send us a link to, I think it. Oh no, I don't want to move away, oh, from Prozac.

Teralyn Sell: 21:33

It was a Prozac link, yes, and you said PSSD is buried in the insert which it is because I'm going through it and I'm like where is this it lists everything else and then suddenly, at the very bottom, it lists sexual dysfunction, and I want to read it because something hit me here. Although changes in sexual desire, sexual performance and sexual satisfaction often occur as a manifestation of a psychiatric disorder, they may also be a consequence of pharmacologic treatment. In particular, some evidence suggests that SSRI can cause such untoward sexual experiences. Untoward sexual experiences.

Teralyn Sell: 22:25

Reliable estimates of the incidence and severity of the experiences involving sexual desire, performance and satisfaction are difficult to obtain, however, in part because patients and physicians may be reluctant to discuss them, and that part and the very beginning part, to me are the two that stood out. The reluctance to uh-oh, he's gone. The reluctance to discuss sexuality in a therapist's office or in a prescriber's office is something that I find fascinating, because you should be talking about sex and sexuality, especially when you're someone who is 19 to 22 years old. I would think that that would be part of the conversation altogether.

Jennifer Schmitz: 23:05

Well, and what you just read, terry, I think that what stands out to me, the first half of what you read the former of that was almost blaming the idea that these sexual side effects can happen it's the psychology of the person. It's not that the distress from this is coming from the psychiatric medication. The distress itself is coming from the actual mental health of the individual that is taking the psychiatric medication. Now, I know that it then goes on and gives the other half of it, but I think that that's what a lot of people experience. Kale, in your case, it's interesting because you actually had a provider In your case. You actually had a provider who said to you yeah, well, psychiatric medication like this is a super common side effect.

Jennifer Schmitz: 23:58

I don't hear that a lot. I don't hear people a lot say well, my provider is the one that said this is really common. Yeah, you're taking a fixer right, and that's a super common thing. What we hear a lot more is providers who can't seem to connect the dots within the idea that the sexual side effects that you're having are coming from the psychiatric medication. So that insert right there tells you a lot about their stance on this and how, most of the time it's the provider going. Oh, this is part of your mental health.

Jennifer Schmitz: 24:29

This is a psychological issue that you have. Something I pulled up here which I thought was a little bit interesting is that there was a study that came out not too long ago that PubMed put out because I was reading about this, and the hard part about this is now that there's more awareness of it. Research is actually starting to be done on this, but the numbers, when you look up the numbers of people that are struggling with PSSD part of what you just said, terry, at the end of that insert is it also has partially to do with the connection being made that the sexual side effects are coming from the antidepressant and people have to report that. These are things that have to be reported. So this study that I found was one that was a 19-year-old retrospective cohort analysis that was done, which requires that people reported this, and that this was actually reported out to drug companies, right, and so they used a huge computerized database.

Jennifer Schmitz: 25:33

This was actually out of Israel Okay, it was a study that was done in a different country but what they came up with is that one out of about every 216 patients within this cohort analysis that they did not only suffered with PSSC, but suffered with irreversible effects. So that have not gotten better for them. One out of every 216. That's it better for them? One out of every 216. That's it? Yes, and this was going back about 19 years Now. Again, when I read this one, I'm like, well, that's horrific, right. So out of every 200 people, I mean of the millions of people that are taking antidepressants, right? You think about that?

Jennifer Schmitz: 26:13

One out of every 200 of you is going to probably struggle with this, and it's irreversible.

Teralyn Sell: 26:17

I think it's more, I think it's more Right.

Jennifer Schmitz: 26:19

So in this, case it was specifically like ED. That's irreversible. The sexual side effects have been there the entire time and have never gotten better, so that was alarming to me. It's probably more than that right, because we're talking about you have to report this right, but that's alarming to me, even at that number, and we know that number is low.

Cael Mecham: 26:48

Yeah Right, and it could be a lot higher just due to the fact that a lot of like prescribers or doctors like we'll just say it's the underlying condition, like it's just the depression or the anxiety that's causing these symptoms.

Jennifer Schmitz: 26:55

Yes, yeah, it's the psychological piece of it that's creating these responses that are happening.

Teralyn Sell: 27:01

And I still go back to your story. You started off with anxiety because you left your home at 19, which, to me, there's a level of that that I would expect right at 19. Even if it were just going to college, but it sounded like you went off and lived by yourself somewhere whatever there would be a level of anxiety and trepidation and all of that Like. To me, that would be like a typical response to a 19 year old going out forging out on their own Right. So, but you started with anxiety and then suddenly now you have suicidal depression. Yeah, and this is this is so common to so many people, which is why I think those diagnoses often are diagnosed together. Right, you start with one, you end up with the other and usually you end up with another because you get medicated and that medication now causes something else.

Teralyn Sell: 27:52

And you had also mentioned and I kind of blurted out, because I'm feeling kind of blirty today that you took it and within a couple of days you were like euphoric, right, that is like this mania, induced mania that you probably had, that a lot of people experience. And in that time, just like with you, it was this wow, this is an amazing thing. I've never felt like this before, when really that was mania induced by the medication, which then, by the way, people will say, oh, maybe you are bipolar, right? So yeah, did you have that too? Did you? Do they question bipolar with you?

Cael Mecham: 28:35

Not at that time, but in a different talking with a different doctor. They did mention that, yeah.

Jennifer Schmitz: 28:41

Yeah Well, having an antipsychotic thrown into the mix, what is? The symptom that you were experiencing that led to. Okay, yeah, he's like I don't even know, I have no idea at this point.

Cael Mecham: 28:54

Yeah. So when I wasn't sleeping for so long, um, I was just desperate, I was I need help, you know. So that's when I went to an Instacare and I met with a doctor and, um, she didn't even tell me, but uh, she was like, yeah, this, this medication, like will help you sleep.

Jennifer Schmitz: 29:11

Instacare. So this is like an urgent care kind?

Teralyn Sell: 29:14

of drive through, you just get a doctor if you've got an issue. What you got an antipsychotic at a walk-in clinic Instacare like. Walmart.

Cael Mecham: 29:27

Like what? Yeah, I didn't even know that it wasn't antipsychotic until I Googled it. And then I was like what am I going to be taking? But I was so desperate to sleep that I was willing to take it, because I didn't know about like all of this, you know, until I started looking into it myself, you know.

Jennifer Schmitz: 29:45

So how'd you come across the PSSD network in terms of getting yourself involved within this? Where did that? Where?

Cael Mecham: 29:51

did that come into the story? Just Googling like like I try to remember like just sexual dysfunction from like like Cymbalta and like just looking up like even after you stopped the medication, like like symptoms of like that I was experiencing, and even a little bit of with AI, like asking you know, and it like told me about like PSSD and then like I started Googling like PSSD and then I saw the network and then I reached out to them and then they connected me with with the group.

Teralyn Sell: 30:22

So yeah, wow, that's pretty amazing. I do want to kind of circle back to the gene site conversation that you had. Um, because people get pissed about this? They do because the exact reason it's so bad I know because.

Jennifer Schmitz: 30:38

I'm like'm like. You need to be very cautious with all of that, and they get really mad.

Teralyn Sell: 30:43

Oh yeah, because this is going to be the slam dunk of prescribing, right. So if we only know what your genes will tolerate, then you can be prescribed the thing that will be matched with your genes. That is not even a scientific thing right now, like it is so infant in its infancy, that. But people look at it like this is what is supposed to help me. But more often than not I hear stories like yours that well it would. All these are in the green, like there's, if you guys don't know, there's like a green column which is like go, a yellow which is like caution, and a red is stay away, right, and so it has to do with how your body methylates certain things. But anyway, it's a whole different show. But if it's in the green column, it's supposed to be good for you.

Teralyn Sell: 31:30

It's supposed to work for you.

Jennifer Schmitz: 31:32

You can metabolize it. It can go through the body without there being adverse side effects.

Teralyn Sell: 31:36

Right no-transcript Right which they're. Cymbalta is horrible, like I it's terrible, it's bad.

Teralyn Sell: 31:55

There's whole Facebook groups. I think there's almost 50,000 people in this one group called Cymbalta hurts worse, um, and that group is just filled with 50,000 suffering people on Cymbalta and um, so right, when you said that, I was like Whoa, so this is the cautionary tale about gene site as well. So the relative that told you like this is the slam dunk, like I hope they know that it wasn't. Were you able to tell them like this? No, no, it's OK, we'll tell them. Send them the episode.

Jennifer Schmitz: 32:26

If they ever find us. Yeah, cats out of the bag, cal.

Cael Mecham: 32:29

Truth's out.

Teralyn Sell: 32:31

Truth's out, yes, so so there of the bag, cal. Yep, truth's out, truth's out, yes, so there's that part of it. And then it was also interesting when you started with Lexapro as being, you know, the easiest to handle medication. Like the way that it was sold to you is important, right, because it was sold to you like it's well tolerated, like nobody has anything bad that happens to them on this medication. Lexapro is hardcore. Well, they all are hardcore.

Teralyn Sell: 32:58

I hate it when we have this, like you know, differentiation of worse, better, what's you know, less risky, more safe. They all come with risk and they all come with iatrogenic harm right attached to them, with risk, and they all come with iatrogenic harm right attached to them. I wonder if somebody would have said that to you off the start, what do you do? You think it would have been different for you if they said, hey, like every medication that we're going to prescribe, you will come with a side effect of harm. We don't know what that side effect is going to be, but here's a strong list for you to consider and, as a 19 year old, it might take your sexuality away.

Cael Mecham: 33:36

Yeah, I would not have taken them at all.

Teralyn Sell: 33:38

Yeah, yes, yes, just during that part of your life period, right, um, and so I I typically say, like, as a woman, like I was really dismissed when it came to sexual dysfunction. I was really dismissed about it. My husband was villainized for wanting it and I was dismissed for it even happening. Ok, like he should have been more kind and considerate with me and put his own sexual desires on the on the table, even though I had none. Like I had zero, I was numbed out, and that, as I because a lot of this for Jen and I too is I had zero, I was numbed out, and that, as I, cause a lot of this for Jen and I too is kind of going back in our history, same as you like going back and connecting the dots and the pieces. And so, knowing that the show was coming up, I was starting to think about it and there were definite things that happened to me, or should say didn't happen to me, even post taking the SSRI, which I chalked up to being a mom, being stressed out, being all these things. And now I know that it was still a continuation and I probably could have been diagnosed with PSSD for the post use of the SSRI.

Teralyn Sell: 34:47

But it's interesting to me because it doesn't seem like the message you got as a young male was all that different than the message that I got as a woman you know, a middle aged woman. The message of nothing to see here, kind of, right, the message of your mental health is more important than your sexual health at this point, right, that's the message that I got. It kind of sounds like you had a similar message Also, the message of this isn't happening, just being purely gaslit by your therapist. This isn't even a thing, don't worry about it.

Teralyn Sell: 35:24

Yes, and so if you, I also wonder as a 19 year old who sought help, it sounds like you have a lot of prescribers in your family, so the idea of mental health equals a prescription seems pretty, maybe profound. But also, you're of the generation that mental health care and treatment and medication is like the way to go. Yeah, your generation is very hooked into medications, and do you think that that may have played a part for you thinking like, well, I've heard about all this stuff and it's good, therefore, this is what I need. Do you feel like that type of messaging kind of got to you too?

Cael Mecham: 36:07

Yeah, like even in high school, we're told like if, if, like you need to reach out for help, like if you're suffering, like reach out for help, right, and so like reaching out for help is going to your doctor and like asking for help, you know. So I was like the medications like approved, like it's safe, you know. And then here I am.

Jennifer Schmitz: 36:27

Yeah.

Teralyn Sell: 36:28

Yeah.

Jennifer Schmitz: 36:29

Yeah, so. So if we fast forward, like to present day, right now, kale, um, you started to touch on this before um, terry and I have talked about this. We did did an episode way, way, way back on this um about the impacts of psychiatric medications on marriages. Okay, so if you put yourself in present day, right now, no-transcript.

Cael Mecham: 37:25

But it's just, I can't do it. Like it's like have to lie, like I have to fake, like like being fine, you know, all the time and like just even like sexually, I um got prescribed like erectile dysfunction medication, you know, like Cialis to try to help Like if I was going to have like a sexual encounter, like I could use it. But it was more just like yeah, it's just, it's very hard, like it's not possible, you know, and even that like it didn't help, it only helped direction Right, it didn't help anything else.

Teralyn Sell: 38:00

Right, it wasn't even worth it.

Cael Mecham: 38:01

Yeah, so just not possible, like, if you find the right person, I think it is, but it's just, it's a lot of baggage. I would say you know to like tell somebody about right Right.

Jennifer Schmitz: 38:17

Well and hard to describe too right Like, unless someone understands this or has been through this, they might see you as cold or kind of shallow, or it's just kind of off-putting that you can't make that genuine kind of connection with somebody, or even to be able to be in a space to like sexually, be able to physically be able to do the things that you want to be able to do, and having to then try to explain that to someone like yeah not possible unless it's like the perfect person.

Teralyn Sell: 39:06

You know, know, it's just very hard. Yeah, like if I, maybe if I find the right person, maybe if I find. So I want to point that out as a as a measure of like you are hopeful, like there might be a little glimmer of hope in there. So please don't, please don't lose that. You know in the back of your mind that it could change, and things do change, yes, cause I know that this has got to be a pretty scary time for you, because I know that this has got to be a pretty scary time for you. Has there been anything just for our listeners? Is there anything that you do that has been helpful, at least in the little?

Cael Mecham: 39:44

bit for you. Well, you know, it's like different for everybody, right, like what helps one person might not really help another. And I think mostly just like I don't know nothing like super helps, like, like, oh, like this helps so much. But I think maybe just being outside, kind of like trying to connect, like I think I've been told this quite a bit just like trying to connect with nature, like just trying to be outside like just something like not so stressful you know to think about, just maybe just like mindfulness, right, just like yeah, that's what.

Teralyn Sell: 40:21

I would say, yeah, I I part of my story is, but I had to intentionally connect with everything, like very intentionally, and often big things I had to do in order to feel something big. It had to be big, uh, for me to do it. So, yeah, and the intentional connection to yourself, um, cause I would explain it a lot that I felt like my head was disconnected to my body an awful lot Like it, like it wasn't not even the same entity. Um, for a long time I do remember what I was going to say Shout out to your friends in college for pointing out that you were different, and not in a good way. Yes, because I feel like that's important. That people do. You know it goes back to if you see something, say something. You could just save someone's life. In that way. You could make a big difference for them. Shout out to your friends, even though it probably hurt to hear that it probably hurt, but they did the right thing by saying something. If you could rewind time, what do you think you would have done differently?

Cael Mecham: 41:36

That's a good question, yeah. What would you say to that?

Jennifer Schmitz: 41:38

19 year old self right.

Cael Mecham: 41:40

Yeah, exactly Like just that everything will be okay. Like you don't need to like just be so anxious about everything. Like just like relax, right. Like like work out more. You know, if you're still anxious, go anxious, go work out more. Go go be out in nature, you know, go connect with things. Like like I just, you know, I wish I could go back and just not take any medication, but it's too late, right? So if I could tell myself I would just calm down. Like you know, everything will be okay.

Teralyn Sell: 42:16

I think that's the reminder, and I tell my kids this and I tell anybody who will listen that things will work out. Everything will be okay if you allow it to be okay. Sometimes, when we interject an intervention, we make it not okay.

Cael Mecham: 42:32

Yeah, make it worse.

Teralyn Sell: 42:33

We make it worse, exactly so, all right, do you have any other thoughts that you would like to share with anyone about PSSD or your life? What would you like to share?

Cael Mecham: 42:47

Yeah, that's a good question. Just that, like I wish other health organizations around the world recognize this condition, like the EMA, health Canada, like the health agency in Canada, hong Kong, like all over the globe, like they recognize it. But yes, they do. It's just I wish the FDA, like, would take more action to warn people is what I would wish, because I wouldn't want anybody else to get this. You know, it's just has a life-altering effect, because, like what if this doesn't get better? You know what if this is my life, you know for the rest of my life, right? Yeah, so it's just they need to be warned before they take medication, like if you need medication, like I'm not completely against medication, but you need to have like consent of what to expect, you know, and the risks, right?

Teralyn Sell: 43:47

So yeah, yeah. And therapists need to keep their mouth shut if they don't understand the medication, um, and to not say false things to people about medication. They need to just say I don't know. I'd rather hear I don't know than absolutely not. I'd rather hear that. So therapists need to get real with this and, as far as the FDA goes, in labeling, they need to not bury it on page 13 of 25 on an insert, just so everyone knows that that should be number one because I think taking away someone's sexuality or ability to connect and pleasure is taking away their humanity. And that needs to be number one because this I thought mental health was regaining humanity and connection. I thought that's what it was, but instead often it's quite the opposite. So, all right, well, thank you for being here, kale.

Jennifer Schmitz: 44:40

Yeah, thanks for coming.

Jennifer Schmitz: 44:43

If you guys have stayed this long. We are wrapping up our episode of the Guess the Truth podcast. You can find us anywhere that you listen to podcasts, and please go ahead and give us five stars, because that's what we deserve and that's all we want, and you can also send us your gaslit truth stories or, if you're interested in coming on the show, to thegaslitruthpodcast at gmailcom. And we are also on all the socials so you can DM us on any of those as well. So that is a wrap. Thank you again, cale, for sharing your story. Thank you guys Appreciate it.