132 : Strengthening Intuition Like a Muscle | Practices & Exercises for Deeper Intuitive Powers

Your body often knows the truth before your brain can build a convincing argument. We get real about “woo-woo intuition” and make it practical: how to recognize the first clean signal, why we override it, and what it takes to rebuild self-trust after years of second-guessing, people-pleasing, or living from the neck up.

We share stories that reveal the pattern fast, including online scams and high-pressure moments where urgency, shame, and isolation push people into decisions they already felt were wrong. We also talk about medical decision-making and why a patient deserves time, space, and support to process information at their own pace. The throughline is integrity: knowing what you stand for and refusing to compromise it just to belong, whether that pressure comes from a friend group, family system, or workplace culture.

Then we get tactical. We walk through simple intuition exercises you can use today: pause and breathe when your nervous system gets hijacked, step away and recalibrate, write it down, say it out loud to someone you trust, and use a pros and cons list to get clarity out of your head. We also offer journaling prompts, a mindfulness-based noting practice, and one powerful question that cuts through mental noise: “What would love have me do now?” Finally, we break down intuition vs anxiety, including how panic, urgency, and numb shutdown can disguise themselves as “instinct.”

If you’ve been craving better decision-making, calmer boundaries, and a more aligned life, hit play. Subscribe, share this with a friend who needs it, and leave a review so more people can find the show.

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Transcript

Welcome And The Intuition Muscle

Polly Mertens 0:28

Hey superstars, welcome back. Polly here.

Samantha Pruitts 0:30

And Sam Pruitt. What's up, beautiful humans? What's up? Hey, let's talk today about that woo-woo intuition.

Polly Mertens 0:39

Yes. Yeah. Lots of stories are good.

Samantha Pruitts 0:44

Lots of stories coming up. Yeah. I think we've both had some experiences or have been around people with some experiences lately of, you know, one thing I'll just throw into the space is one of my favorite lines. Learn this one the hard way is I was like, okay, when I heard that, I was like, okay, that's pretty much my life, which is good judgment comes from bad judgment.

Polly Mertens 1:07

Yes, it does. Good judgment. And so, you know, taking that and valuing those opportunities to develop not just intuition, but plenty of other muscles. But intuition being one of those muscles that will literally help you build your life rather than running the other way.

Samantha Pruitts 1:28

And what if it is a muscle or like a highway, you know, or a trail that gets like either ignored or leaves grow over it or whatever, or it's like a super highway to your intuition, right? Or a like a big old muscle. It's like, I got that thing, you know, like I've you've got it when you need it, right?

Polly Mertens 1:43

So that's what we're pitching today, basically, is it can be a super strength, a superpower, you know, a highway to all kinds of not only a better decision-making process, right? But a pathway to achieving all kinds of goals and ultimately success and satisfaction too, right?

Samantha Pruitts 2:03

Mm-hmm. Yeah, you were saying, you know, before we went on air about how you have a lot, you know, you you have good judgment now. You have an intuitive muscle. Yeah, right. And and so I was like, well, I think that came from a lot of years and a lot of mistakes we've both made. I'm sorry, you know.

Polly Mertens 2:19

I mean, but it's I was not born with that.

Samantha Pruitts 2:23

Yeah. Well, I think we're all born with it, but we, you know, we get so busy in our teen years, you know, looking at other people and what what does the crowd say and what does the tribe say or whatnot. And we just kind of acquired our own intuition, right? It's not something that I think there's some people definitely. I was listening to something earlier today that was like about basically like fly your freak flag. It was like, man, the the there's so much going on in the world that is trying to make you vanilla and normal and you know, homogenize you and get you into the mean. And it's like you have to fight, you have to have so much energy to stay outside the mean and stay true to your path, stay true to whatever, you know, like it just wants you to be average, wants you to be in the nexus of that. And there's these trailblazers, and I think those that either listen to it early on, we see them, you know, take a whole different trajectory, or later in life. They they just, you know, I know a lot of women our age just sort of wake up and go, this done with all of y'all. Like I'm done with pleasing and all that stuff. Yeah.

Polly Mertens 3:27

Yeah. I mean, I feel like, yeah, you're born with the capabilities to use that muscle, but it is through life that it's really developed, right? It's like endless bicep curls.

Samantha Pruitts 3:39

Endless. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. And a lot of sweat and tear, you know, that bad judgment is like a lot of mistakes along the way. You know, you were talking about like, I was like, well, we have a couple of recent examples, and then you helped me remember like lots more examples of my life of. Oh, yeah, I did make that bad judgment with that person or that job or that whatever, you know.

Polly Mertens 4:02

And maybe we should out of the gate just say so an example of not listening, and we will thread stories in, but is an overriding of that signaling that I think we both agree it can manifest very quickly in the body before it hits the brain,

How Intuition Hits The Body

Polly Mertens 4:19

right? So there can be an energetic or a body or a body system-wide response, almost, if you will. We keep saying gut instinct, but really it's not placed in your stomach or your intestines or whatever, right? It's not hidden in there like some little button, you know, that somebody's pushing, but it can be absolutely a physical response. The reason it's a physical response is your nervous system is activated. You know, we can go on about the nervous system when we have, but anyway, that's one of the entryways or trigger points is through the nervous system. So you'll feel it in your physical body. And that instinct, rather than just calling it gut instinct, that full body instinct then very slowly can percolate up to your brain waves and create some sort of communication or not. And that can happen in so many different instances. I mean, you and I were giving examples before we started, but literally, you know, we did talk about scams and people being taken advantage of online or otherwise, you know, bad relationship decisions, work environments where you were not in agreement with what was transpiring. Yeah, there's just endless amounts of life experiences where that intuition is your goal, your guide. It is a pathway for sanity on how to move forward, you know. And so many of us just don't put enough value in it.

Samantha Pruitts 5:46

Well, and I think at least I'll speak from first person, is definitely through my eating disorder years, the disconnect between what was above my head and what was below. There's just like like the body was not a thing that I spoke to or connected with. You know, if anything, I was there was a shame about it. There was uh always trying to perfect it, trying to get it to do something or be something that it wasn't. And because of that, I treated it like crap, right? So, you know, for those of us that have that disconnect from, you know, we think we're all just up in this head, you know, all of us is all of us being our greater self, if you will, lives between our ears. It took me a lot of years to realize, oh no, there's the whole dynamic here. And the body has so much wisdom. So, and you know, the signals are, I would say, yes, we can tap into a level of wisdom through our brain and our mental capacity, but what and where in our body, as you've studied and I've studied different practices of where other wisdom comes from, especially if we if you believe in some sort of higher self or God self or whatever your beliefs are, you know, how you tap into that is probably not coming through your quote, brain or your mind. It's probably not, you know, but we use that sucker like it's the knife and the tool belt, and everything is up there. And, you know, what you're pointing to is not really.

Polly Mertens 7:09

And as if it's the boss of us, which is also hilarious.

Samantha Pruitts 7:12

Yeah.

Polly Mertens 7:13

And whatever crazy ideas, however, they got up there, you know, that's kind of comical. That we would think that they should just be running the show, which of course that's just not really how it works, right? Yeah.

Samantha Pruitts 7:23

Well, I mean, it does, you know, there's a part of that ego that's like it has ideas and all sorts of things that it wants to create and goals and like, wouldn't this be nice? And magical, you know, fairy tales or, you know, real things that we want to get up to. And yet our intuitive wisdom, like the whole body wisdom of like, really, what you know, I'm not here to say that we have a karma that's tied to something before we came in and you can't change that or something. It's like, oh, there's a script, and if you don't have it from your body, then you're not on track or whatever. But I think there is like a dynamic going on, right? So, yes, have ideas, have goals, have use your imagination, all of that. And there's this beautiful thing called your intuitive body that has signals it's trying to send you, especially like ones to keep you out of bad situations. Harm's way. Harm's way.

Polly Mertens 8:12

Yeah, yeah. So we'll just a couple examples. Both of us uh have know people have had experiences, many people, with you know, being taken advantage of financially, whether it's through weird dating apps or fraud or online anything. You know, that whole space is just so dark and toxic right now. Yeah. And

Scams Thrive On Rush And Shame

Polly Mertens 8:31

I think there was a show, and I think it's called Catfish or something like that, but there was like a series of these women on this actual documentary where they had all been taken advantage of through online dating. And I remember exorbitance, dudes, exorbitant amount of money. Yes, mind-blowing.

Samantha Pruitts 8:50

And I just hundreds of thousands of dollars.

Polly Mertens 8:53

Yeah, yes, exactly.

Samantha Pruitts 8:54

Like a suitor, like a guy came on hard, like he was like, you know, Joe Gigolo or something like that. And you're I remember that documentary, I know what you're talking about, yeah.

Polly Mertens 9:03

Yeah, and it got them, yeah. Right. At what point did they not have some sense? And of course they do unpack their stories, and they all say there was a point where I was just absolutely new. No, this is wrong, but I was doing it anyway. Right. So it's just not honoring themselves, their truth, their needs, all of these things, and then completely overriding their gut instincts, their intuition. Right. That's an extreme example of it. Okay.

Samantha Pruitts 9:33

You know what, as you were saying that, something that just translated, because you and I both have experiences and stories of either ourselves or other people. One of the ones where I was, quote, taken advantage of, or I, you know, let myself be taken advantage of. I was buying festival tickets on like a Facebook group or something, something like that. And then it quickly, and then it was like, all of a sudden, you know, the the time constraint starts to get there. Well, you know, I could sell this to other people. I was like, oh, you know, and the tickets were going fast or whatever. And it was like, blah, blah, blah, you know, and that just and and it seemed legit, seemed legit, but and then it was like a Western Union. And that's when I was like, what? Who uses Western Union? You know, like that's should have been my like, I mean, it probably was if I pause, but it was like, get the ticket, get the ticket kind of moment. Is where do we isolate in those moments where there's either shame or time constraint? You know, like a couple of the stories you and I were talking about before on air, or like this one. Like, if I had had somebody to talk about and go, hold up, let me let me just go in the other room and like, hey, I'm about to make this transaction with somebody, you know, what do you think? Like, but we or these women who probably have been seeing these guys and maybe they pull them away from their friends. I think that's kind of a common strategy is like they get them out of their friend circles and stuff like that. So they can't isolation. Yeah. Predators will isolate. Yeah. Yeah. So it's, you know, if you have that, those time constraints or those, you know, intensive moments or whatever, it's like intuition doesn't move like that. You know, I think we should talk a little bit about like what the the feelings are, the experiences are. We can go into, you know, ways to start using and strengthening this muscle. But do you want to tell us some more stories? Any that you Yeah.

Polly Mertens 11:13

I mean, I have another example. It was somebody right now, I I was expressing to you who I care deeply about. They're ill, they have a disease state, and they're trying to process it in their way, the information, how much information do they want to read, study, research, you know, drug options, surgery

Health Choices Need Time And Agency

Polly Mertens 11:32

options, different options for them to get treatment, et cetera, et cetera, right? And that process is very individual. The person who is the one fighting for their life deserves the time and the space to go through this in their own way and have the support, but not be pushed or, you know, intimidated. The doctors can do that, loved ones can do that. I've seen it over and over and over. You know, we got to make this decision. This is the right decision. It's like, okay, hold, hold up. And in this instance, you know, a loved one is pressuring them to digest all this information and make a quick decision, and we've got to move forward and all this stuff. And it's not, it's causing a lot of conflict, but I'm, you know, the intervening health advocate or whatever you want to call me in this instance, saying, you know, really we need to not be doing that. Yes, let's make sure this person has resources for information they're willing and ready to receive at their own pace, and then someone to talk to about it, right? Where there isn't fear, anxiety, and intimidation or a strange dynamic. And then and then supporting them to be able to listen to their intuition and their own physical body response around how they want to move forward. And then the the rest of the people and players in their life, including doctors in medical care, right? Respecting that patient, that person's process, et cetera. And like they were getting pushed to even do tests that they didn't want to do, you know, that were gonna be very painful and very invasive and may or may not give us any information. Like it was just getting nutty and expensive. I'm not saying that that wasn't the right decision for some people. Some people want that path, and that is what they prescribe to do. Yeah, okay. I'm also cool with that. That's their style of being in the world, right? But for many of us, that's not the case. So that's an example of I'm so happy to bear witness and be a facilitator of sort in this experience, allowing this person to really listen to their intuition and honor their own wishes.

Samantha Pruitts 13:42

For sure, for sure. Yeah, that it sounds like the other person might be in a state of fear or lack or anxiety or something, you know, predicting some outcome that they don't want to experience, you know, the the loss of this person, the discomfort of, you know, like, no, you need to say, like, you know, let's get you some some answers quickly. Whereas it's that's not their journey. Yours is separate.

Polly Mertens 14:04

So exactly. Exactly. Do you have any other examples of either people you know who haven't listened to their intuition or maybe they have exceptionally well? Like I just gave an example of somebody really doing a good job there.

Samantha Pruitts 14:16

Yeah. Well, I would love to hear yours, because like you said, you know, early on, maybe not making some. And now, like, I mean, I know you to be so fast at like no, you know. So one of the things that I started to think about in the background, and this is a whole other topic, and we don't have to go too deep into it, but you know how I'm really fascinated with like human design and gene keys, which is a whole nother world of energy, bodies, and stuff like that. And let's just say, you know, one of the things is as a certain type. So there's like six types, I think, or something, what's called a generator. And so my my is it my solar plexus? Wait a minute. Oh, that doesn't sound right. It's lower sacred, say, sacral energy, right? So my my yeses and my no's come from sacral energy, like uh-huh. You know, like like a like a like a like if I'm a yes for it, I'm gonna yes for it right away. And and so like if someone comes to me with a question, intuitively you might say, or I have a yes or no, whether I swallow that down or shut it down or mentally start going into rehearsal of, you know, well, I'm gonna go like this and that or whatever. But if I don't tell it away. Yeah, I mean, you're you're a nice friend, Jen. I love you, Jen. She's really good at reminding me of like, if it's not a hell yes, or you too, like if it's not a hell yes, then it's a no. And it's like, you know, and we love to go upstairs into the mind and rationalize all the things, right? Like, how could this work? And right. And so we'll get into ways to stay in touch with that intuition.

Polly Mertens 15:40

But yeah, I think you see it a lot in friend groups, right? So we're giving in a positive example in our friend group because we are no longer young, you know, highly influenced females. We are pretty developed in our truth and our vision and what we stand for and all of that kind of stuff.

Samantha Pruitts 15:56

That's authentic to us. Yeah.

Polly Mertens 16:02

I'll speak for myself when I was younger and I was in a peer group, you know, many times I would adjust to the peer group, and I would probably many times also be the one causing negative, you know, opportunities for the peer group. I have that one too.

Samantha Pruitts 16:21

Exactly.

Integrity When You Want To Belong

Samantha Pruitts 16:21

I'm like, this is a damn good idea. You need to do this.

Polly Mertens 16:24

You know, yeah. And that can happen when we're younger, again, in peer groups and relationships and stuff, or even in family environments where we don't feel really strong about standing up for ourselves or whatever. But now, you know, all these years later, and really so I learned many experiences the hard way that way. But now I do see it still show up in grown adults in a work environment. And it's almost like those old patterns of theirs are playing out now outside of a peer group sort of thing, outside of a family unit, and to this family, uh, sorry, this work family or this work team kind of environment where they're still making compromises to their own knowing and wisdom, integrity, really. You know, that's to me what intuition is me knowing what I stand for and then standing for it with integrity. Like that's what it is to me. But the people I do see them compromising that because they still want to belong, they still want to fit in. Doesn't matter their age, they still want to be seen a certain way. It is part of their identity, you know, um, or be valued. They don't want to be devalued, right? So they're willing to ignore that intuition. And to me, at this point in my ripe old age of 57, there is no way in heaven. Like I there's not even an inch and zero. So, but I just have like spidey senses around this now, and it's probably because it was breached so many times, and somehow I kept myself alive, and here I am. So I just it's just a no for me, you know.

Samantha Pruitts 18:05

You know, one of the things is you were saying that about peer groups and stuff. I was thinking back to my college friends that I see about once a year, and we still are in, you know, text text talks and stuff like that. And all of them followed the get a stable job, you know, that kind of a path with whatever, you know, retirement was the goal and steady and yeah. And and I show up to these events and I'm always like, here's what I'm doing now, you know, and it's just like so, I mean, I'm just like bouncing off the walls, rebel, mavericky, trying stuff, you know, constantly. And and as I, you know, you said a couple of words that I want to touch on. One is like compromise and comparing. And so I have a when my anxiety shows up or that side of me that is not my intuitive self, I do this really good job of comparing. I go, wow, look at it over there. Look at their life over there. It it doesn't, and my intuition is like, oh hell no. Like, like I couldn't do, you know, and I've tried the stable job and stable this, whatever, and just lock yourself in almost feels like a cage to me. And it's like, can't frickin' do it, right? And so my intuition is so it's such a strong, it's not a whim, it's just a it's a hell no for that, you know. But it's also like alluring to look at the the compromise I'd be making in my life to quote fit in, to, you know, have the same as they have, and I have something different or whatever. But I have trusted that intuitive, yeah, you gotta do, you gotta trust that. Like we're who knows? You know, and you and I, especially this year with this study of a year to live. The more I think about it, I'm like, is my life look like this or that person or whatever? Like one of the hap persons I know that has the most money right now is one of the un most unhappy, stress-out people that I know. And I'm like, and then I look back at my life and I go, I have such a beautiful life. Like, I'm happy, I feel good, my body is good, I have friendships, all in all this richness that doesn't equate to their bank account. And I wouldn't trade a penny of it for what their life looks like right now, right?

Polly Mertens 20:11

And that's we're getting at the core of what intuition is, right? Which is you have such great clarity at this point about who you are in the world, your value system, and the type of life you want to live, intentional, purpose-driven life, that it's just a no. Exactly. No, right? So that's the part of you that responds to that when you start doing the comparison, I would imagine.

Samantha Pruitts 20:38

And I was gonna say when the comparison, which is never fucking hell. It's like one of my favorite lines, Oprah, when she was like, How did she say it? She's had this one thing that was like when she was coaching her team and when she had the Oprah show and she had a bunch of really high-powered women producers, right? And so they would come to her pitching stories and stuff like that. And this is when the Oprah show was on the way up, not as established as it was. And they would look at the outside and see like two or three other show hosts that talked about this or talked about that. And she's like, Look, we are running like it was. She was like, it's like a horse race. She's like, You're in your lane. You just run in your lane. That's you you put those freaking blinders on, you do not look left, you do not look right, run your race. And I was like, fuck, yeah, like run your race. And you and I know this, right? When we do literal races, right? If I try to run somebody else's race, I fall on the ground. You know, I'm like, okay, can't keep up with that person. Run my race, run my race, right? Mm-hmm.

Polly Mertens 21:40

Aligned, you know, authentically aligned. It's so good. It's so good. And the breach of that is nothing but suffering. On the other side of it is nothing but suffering. Yeah. Okay. So let's talk about. We've told some kind of horrific stories without getting into detail, a few of them might we could get into more. It might pop back up. But if somebody wants to develop this muscle, let's help them start today. First of all, they know they already have it, right? It's just a matter of now we got to start flexing it and developing those things so it can

Practical Ways To Train Intuition

Polly Mertens 22:15

help guide your life.

Samantha Pruitts 22:16

So I would say three practical ways to train. Your intuition, right? Like if it's a muscle or a highway, a superhighway or whatever you want to call it, right? Yeah. Develop it, right? Like I said in the beginning, where I was for many, many years eating disorder days of like, I didn't even know there was a body down here. Like there were like a connection, right? So, um, and there's a great book. Oh, what's her name? Glenn Glennon Doyle Melton. She has a chapter in one of her books. I'm trying to remember the name title of it right now. Untamed. Untamed. Great chapter she goes into how she developed her intuition and she did it like this story. Do you remember the story? Like, like she went in the closet.

Polly Mertens 22:55

Go for it.

Samantha Pruitts 22:55

So, and I may flub this because it's been years since I've read it, but it was like she would go into the closet and be still with herself and like start practicing listening, deep, you know, deep listening, let's call it. And you've got things that you're gonna throw in here, Buddhism and stuff like that. And then she would, and so she did that for months and months, you know, like going through some fucking hard stuff with divorce, and she found out she was gay and, you know, all this stuff that she was like working through. And at one point, she you know, instead of being able to go into the closet or whatever at home for 15 minutes, hour, whatever she was taking to do that intuitive listening, she finds herself at a meeting, like a board meeting or something. She's got like all these people sitting around and they're like, What do you think? Right. Or there's this moment that comes to her to decide something. And she, like in her brain, you can hear her thinking. She's like, Can I go to the bathroom? But whatever. And she just had practiced it for so long. She just like dropped down into her, where it kind of sounded like she like sort of dropped down into her well, like her inner well, got the answer. And she's like, and then from then on, I knew I always had it with me. It wasn't in the closet, right? I so one of the things I would say is like, notice that first whisper, not that mental debate that goes on, you know. So we would say intuition shows up, it's fast, it's quiet, and it's clean, right? So it's more like a subtle yes or no in your body than like some analyzing, arguing, second guessing. Like it's not gonna sound like this mental chatter. It's gonna feel more like a warm. Well, how do you experience it?

Polly Mertens 24:26

What is your I think it's just so quick. Sometimes it's hard to notice it and not override or try to schluck it off. Yes. I do see people do that a lot, right? And I would say it's quick because it manifests in the body immediately, and then it starts traveling up, trying to make its way. You know, you're trying to sort of get your feet on the ground a little bit, is what it can feel like. Sometimes it can be very subtle like that, and sometimes it can literally be like, oh, hell no. So it can have really varying degrees of that. That's why that quietness and that listening is so important. I want to just add to the front of that is like the first thing I think the human should do, or what I do, is to pause at the first sign, the first inclination of that. Okay. That could be the environment I am in is giving me the inclination that I might need to be making a different decision or a decision in that space, right? That could be a work, a hard conversation, a work environment, whatever, something high stakes or higher, you know, or it could just be I'm walking along with my life, and all of a sudden, you know, through online or some external thing comes at me and shocks me a little bit, wakes me up, if you will, and then my body responds to that. So the first thing for me is the pause. And with the pause is always the breath.

Samantha Pruitts 26:00

Yeah.

Polly Mertens 26:01

So if I find I'm holding my breath, you really have already gotten hijacked.

Samantha Pruitts 26:05

Yeah.

Polly Mertens 26:05

Okay. So then it's a matter of, oh shit, I've been hijacked by my nervous system, if you will. Let me calm myself down, pause, and then I will move on to the next step. So that to me is step one. And you were going to step my step two, which is basically to then start reflecting and unpacking. Now you can do that yourself through your own internal dialogue and conversation, which means you might have to leave and lock yourself in a closet or a bathroom. I have totally used bathroom stalls many, many times.

Samantha Pruitts 26:40

Yeah.

Polly Mertens 26:41

In work environments, a lot. Like, oh, I'm going to the bathroom. This is about to be a clusterfuck. I'm going to the bathroom and I'm going to sort this shit out, and then I'll come back recalibrated what I think is the next step. So I've utilized that quite a bit. Um, but it can also be writing stuff down. So taking out a pen and paper and doing a list. You you mentioned a list.

Samantha Pruitts 27:04

Yes.

Polly Mertens 27:05

That you utilized, right?

Samantha Pruitts 27:07

Yeah. You know, as you were talking, one of the things I was thinking about is the I want to, the word isn't severity, but the scale or size of the decision you're about to make, you should equate that to a longer time frame, too. Like if this thing has days, months, years implication, thousands of dollars, whatever, give yourself more time to make sure you're in tune with your wisdom, right? And yeah, so one of the things I like to do when it like I can remember a time when we were going to move. I think I did it once moving cross country, and then once moving into another apartment. I was like, okay, well, what are, you know, and I and I wasn't clear. I was like, I think I want this, right? And I made a pros and cons list of like, but like, what if we did that? You know, I think it had like four quadrants. It was like, if we did it, what are the pros, what are the cons of doing it? If we don't, what are the pros and the cons? And it got out all that. I mean, I know that's a mental process, but it's like it helps the intuition knows when it can see it because your mind can only hold on to so much information, right? And especially, especially depending on the state that you're in, right? Like you've talked about this, you know, the places that I've been in where I made poor choices of either like an anxious state or a and I feel under pressure or not the the luxury of time, then you know, you get into that because you know, one of the things I know is when emotions are up, when they're high, I mean, and they can be in high in a lot of different ways, negatively high, whatever, intelligence goes down. We just lose connection, right? But I think it's a practice too, you know, it's a practice of that slowing down, like you said, taking in the small wins with smaller decisions. And I think Glennon Doyle Melton talked about how she would like use that practice on small things, not extremely big, you know, like move the family across country.

Polly Mertens 28:54

You're just building the muscle. Okay. You know what's so fun about what you said is that whole like pros and cons listing is so undervalued, so underutilized. Okay, people think it's dumb and dorky. Well, we probably learned this, or I'll just speak for myself. I learned this in business when I was a young woman in business, right? So my first business, I was literally freaking 18 years old, right? So very quickly, it's like, wait, what's going on? So all these like basic skills around making decisions for my life or my business at that point, you know, were like pros and cons, pros and cons, pros and cons. Even then, I made some bad decisions, but it doesn't matter. At least I went through the process and the work, right, of trying to know what is the right decision here. And there's so there are methodologies that are underutilized. And then there's also the other thing, you know, the obvious, talk to someone you trust. Hell. People are so hesitant to actually discuss with another human that they trust and respect to get some ideas. I just spent a couple hours with the gal I was telling you about, and we were just flushing out two intelligent, well-educated women. You know, she's relatively new to my cyberspace here, my space of friends or whatever. And the conversation was so lovely and wonderful and fun. And I learned all kinds of things, and she learned all kinds. These people are around every corner, not the kind who were enforcing their ideas on you, the kind that you can dialogue with and have intelligent exchange.

Samantha Pruitts 30:33

And you know, really from my study last year of communication courses, right, with the landmark work, I'll just say that what was so valuable, one of the valuable things was it's not so much that you need a sounding board, like, hey, tell me your ideas, and you may need that at times, right? The ability for you to communicate, I can't tell you what you pick up on your own body when it comes out of your mouth. It's almost like you hear yourself, you feel yourself, you have the experience of sharing, and you go, Oh, I already know that's a bad idea. You know, or or like, wow, I I have more clarity because it's vibrated through me out in the world instead of this mental masturbation upstairs, right? It's like, oh, that really sounds like a stupid thing. Never mind. You know, or the person doesn't even have to say anything, doesn't have to judge or give ideas or whatever, but it's just you hearing yourself is really good.

Polly Mertens 31:28

Oh my God, it's enormous. This gal, I was telling you about who's got this illness and is in this battle for her life, really. Like our conversations are just letting her speak and letting her be heard and seen with complete non-judgment and respect and compassion and just like the opening of the space, right? Isn't this really why humans exist and why we're evolved over animal species? I mean, what the hell isn't this it?

Samantha Pruitts 31:58

Yeah, communication, yeah. You know, and and I think what you're pointing to is a really beautiful way if you're not yet tuned in enough or don't feel like you're tuned in enough to the messages from your body, from your higher self, from your wisdom, whatever you want to call it, speaking can, you know, speaking it, sharing it, and journaling too. I think there's a lot to be said. I get a lot when I just journal and I go, well, that where did that stupid story come from? You know, or oh, I'm so much more clear because it gets a little garbled in the mind, right? And so I think those two great exercises and activities are a great way for you to allow your intuition to be a part of the process, right?

Polly Mertens 32:37

Yeah. And if there are really decisions you're not ready to share with someone, I think journaling is the is the way.

Samantha Pruitts 32:44

Yeah.

Polly Mertens 32:46

You know, and we both obviously give journal assignments to people and are about journaling. But like I am just thinking I'm going to visit a friend this weekend who is also in a cancer battle for his life. And like I really want to encourage him to be writing and expressing, you know, because he's he's holding so much emotional charge around all of this because it's a very scary time, you know.

Samantha Pruitts 33:08

So I want to give a possible journal prompt and there's probably 10 we could give, but now that we've brought touched on this, I just want to say so. One of my favorites is really open-ended questions. So, like, so choose your topic or whatever. Like, and open open-ended question could sound like, what do I think about this? Or, you know, what is what is the wisdom that I intuitively know about this, right? And just, and I find, and you've probably, I think it's um Julia Cameron, maybe in her, you know, books on being an artist and stuff like that, but like just writing until you can't write anymore. And what that means is just receiving, right? Like receiving all and oh, maybe it's um who's the woman, uh Elizabeth Gilbert, I think she advises on this, is like you write some a question at the top of the page, you allow, and then you go, and is there anything else? And you just listen and you feel for what comes through. Anything else I want to know about that? Or and it's funny, you know, like and you don't edit. That's the big thing. No editing, no, just like whatever comes out, like or the thought or the whatever. And I've done this before, and you sometimes you do it like timed and for speed, like you because you just want to get to the depths of the mind, the intuitive, you know, like all the underbellies of things. And if you filter, or if you do it with judgment, or you know, if you don't give yourself enough time and breath to really get to it, sometimes like a minute or two in, all kinds of random stuff pops up. And you're like, wow, I didn't even know I was believing that or thinking that way, or I felt about that, right?

Polly Mertens 34:40

In Buddhism, there's a process called noting. Basically, it's like the pause, the breath. Okay. So connecting your brain, your mind, your emotions with the physical body on the planet on the earth. You know, we also call it like taking off your shoes and getting rounded. So

Journaling And The Noting Practice

Polly Mertens 34:59

if we're gonna go up to a thing, we take off our shoes and we get rounded. Like there's this whole thing, right? And then after that, it's like I'm I'm having an experience. I'm gonna noting is a practice, basically. So it's a bruise practice, and you can look it up. And it's been around forever. But the very short story is that you're just simply without emotional attachment, judgment, stories, drama, witness. Yeah, like the witness. You're just noting. I am noting I feel this in my belly or in my back or tension in my neck. I am noting that I feel a certain emotion when I'm talking to this person about this thing, or this experience I am noting has made me feel a certain way, or whatever. So you're you're simply noting, and you do that through journaling. Um, and it is a kind of a type of meditation, but basically it's a noting practice. It's really beautiful. Anyone can do it, it's totally free.

Samantha Pruitts 35:58

Love it. I love it. Yeah, and so much is it's and it's not like, oh, this, that, this. It's like you're it's for yours to discover. I'm sure every noting practice or every noting session, it's gonna look a little different, it's gonna sound a little different, the things that come up. So it's just a way to discover what you may not be tapped into, right? Or you may not have a super highway to that information or wisdom. And I I definitely think, I mean, I've got some friends and us, you know, we've we've been along this path of intuition, that it's like right there, you know, like like boom, it's you know, it's like their guide on their shoulder. It's not like some far off, like what, you know, like a like a long-distance phone call. It's like, nope, right there.

Polly Mertens 36:37

Yep. Okay, so I'm kind of a ninja. When you practice this a lot, you're really good at it. Another journal prompt, and that would go to like my next thing is what I want to say is you can either choose to make a decision or you can choose not to. You should never feel like you have to make a decision in that moment. There's almost nothing, unless this is a life or death situation. And obviously, you're you're hanging by your fingernails here. But we have this idea that everything is urgent and on fire and needs to be dealt with immediately, blah, blah. But this is again all these stories that either society or we've told ourselves. That's 99% of the time is not accurate. So you can choose to make a decision, and I'll give you a prompt for that, or you can choose simply not to decide. But if you want to make a decision in this instance, and you've done these other things we've talked about, a good journal prompt or question to ask would be, what would love have me do now?

Samantha Pruitts 37:33

That's very Elizabeth Gilbert. Yes, yes, yes.

Polly Mertens 37:36

And what would that asking that question is not only

Ask What Love Would Do

Polly Mertens 37:41

so beautiful to give yourself that gift of asking yourself that question, but it very quickly cuts right to right to it. Okay. Because you can't answer that unhonestly. You like you just can't violate that. So then the answer is gonna be, I'm choosing to do nothing, or love would have me choose this thing that is right, right?

Samantha Pruitts 38:08

I love that because it's making the decision from your heart space, not your head space, you know, because you don't have 36 reasons why and the poster board of like, oh, this is what everybody else would do. It's like you're tapped into your connection to love as you define it, right? And this isn't romantic love. This is, you know, the pure essence of light and love that you are, right? So I love that question. I love it.

Polly Mertens 38:29

Is there anything else you'd add to the process or practice of building this intuitive muscle for humans?

Samantha Pruitts 38:37

Not there was something that I was thinking of, and I as soon as I got enrapped in your in your ideas, I was like, I love that idea.

Polly Mertens 38:45

So I'll bring it, I'll circle back and you basically said repetitive practice fucking up. Yeah, I mean, just keep doing it, right? So just by showing up and doing the work called humaning, right? Like you're gonna get so many opportunities rather than I'm gonna live over here this very boring, conservative, quiet life because all of that shit scares me. Nope. Don't do that. Don't do that. You'll wake up one day at whatever age and look back with great regret. So that is not a strategy to develop this intuitive muscle at all.

Samantha Pruitts 39:29

Yeah, I would say the last thing I would share, I think on this, well, another way of looking at it is from my mentor, Linda. Linda, who says, if it's light, if it feels light, it's right. If it feels heavy, it's not for you. Like, so just noticing, does it give you levity? And this is where I think Elizabeth Gilbert would say something like, Everything comes from love, right? Like it's love or fear. And that's, you know, a lot of wisdom talks about that. So does the answer bring you closer to love or light, right? Does it make you feel light about doing it? And that could be nothing. It's like, I feel better, you know, your friend is like, I don't want to make those choices, or I don't want to hear that, or I don't want to do that test, or whatever. It's like, that doesn't feel light to me. Fantastic, right? Like, okay, that's your truth, right? And if it feels heavy or like, you know, and there are times, you know, there's this blend between the doing hard things because there's growth inside of it, you know, which is like, well, wait, I thought it was supposed to feel light. It's like, yeah, you know, I think we know when, well, we know when there's something that is in our best interest. It's like, oh, that is gonna be hard, you know, like making that call or whatever. But my truth is that's that's the right choice for me.

Polly Mertens 40:39

Not 100%, dude. And I would say, you know what's freaking hard? If you want to be doing hard things, follow your intuition. You want to do hard things, live your life by that, knowing that that is grounded in your values, your purpose, your mission, all the things that make you who you are, uniquely you in this one moment, in this one body, in this one life. Like, damn, you do that, you're doing hard shit on the daily.

Samantha Pruitts 41:09

You know, and when you say that, it makes me think of you know, everything you want lives on the outside of your comfort zone, right? And so there's so much that wants to bring us back to that medium, bring us back to the norm, bring us back into the comfort zone, which actually, if you ask me, lives inside of the subconscious mind. Your comfort zone, your box that you put yourself in is your subconscious zone. And think about how much life and the things that feel uncertain or whatnot. Like, but it probably teases you and tickles something inside of you to go, well, what if, right? But if we go with comfortable, like, oh, certainty, but our soul is calling for everything that's outside that comfort zone, everything that's outside of the normal or known. What if, right? And you and I are an invitation to that all day long, right? Like, hey, get out on the branches, you know, where get out, get out into nature, get out into where not everybody is. There's probably something there for you, you know.

Polly Mertens 42:05

Totally, totally. And the more you have that intuition, I'll give an example of like I'm gonna be doing this John Muir trail, right? So 250 miles, I'm across the Sierra Nevadas by myself with 30 plus pounds on my back. Okay. Many people are like, Well, have you done that before? No, of course I haven't. Like, what makes you think you're gonna be able to do it? Really? Have you met me? But anyway, I'm gonna give you a whole laundry list of those things, right? But at the core of that, the foundational built Sam Pruitt core of that is I freaking trust my intuition to make the right decisions and execute to the best of my skill set, to the best of my ability, whatever needs to happen next. Okay, and next is literally one mile at a time, up and down the van, you know, day after day. And and I'm not saying I'll do it perfectly, but the trust is there, and that trust is what actually will get me to the starting line of any hard thing, including this, over and over and over. And that only comes from inside this. Nowhere else.

Samantha Pruitts 43:17

You know, that reminds me of some of my coaching that I've done with eating disorder clients or addiction, you know, largely, because the trust gets eroded during an addictive phase or a you, you know, the you could even do it in a phase where it doesn't feel like an addiction, but it feels like you you're doing things that you're you know you shouldn't be, like eating sugars that you know aren't good for you, or I know I need to go to the gym, I know I need to work less, whatever, right? Call it an addiction. Is when I start with clients because the trust is so self-erodic, because I've been there, right? Rebuilding that self-trust model, like it's like a little bank account. I mean, you and I have talked about this on other episodes. It's those small wins, right? Like those small ways that you start to, you know, get up and do what you said you were gonna do. You know, if you said you're gonna do, like, I mean, I remember the time I've told this story on our podcast before. It's like I said I was gonna do 10 X amount of weight lifts or whatever, and I get to nine and it's hard, and I got 10 in me, and I don't just like go, ah, no he's looking, but like it's you and you, right? Those little you that's self trust is and And it's in, I would say it's in those small wins that the big wins, the big decisions, those moments where something is more critical, more urgent, more, you know, it's gonna make a bigger impact in your life. You've built that trust. I mean, like you're about to take yourself, like you said, on an expedition that has a lot of risk, that has a lot of uncertainty, that has a lot of joy and amazingness, but you're willing to do that because you know you trust yourself if you get into trouble, or you whatever whatever, you know, and you're taking precau, I mean, like you've got all sorts of, you know, fail-safes or you know, you're not walking out on the Yeah. And there's different people I'd say that when we look at people that take what seem like seemingly significant risks, like free solo, you know, people doing solo rock climbing and stuff like that, to them, that's a risk that they've banked. You know, they've got trust in themselves, whatever that is. So yes, yes, yes. So if it's light, if it feels light, it's right. And little small wins, you know, practice these with little things. And I think some of it too is like your intuition. So I would say one of the other things is like check in after the fact, like build your intuition track record, right? You know, they they, you know, like I feel like this person was trustworthy or not trustworthy. Like, how are your how's your track record with making decisions as you start to build this muscle, right? Like I should wait or I should act. Like, how did that turn out? You know? Yeah, yeah.

Polly Mertens 45:37

If one of your hot spots is, you know, dating or relationships, then you know that's an area that needs some time and attention, a different strategy. Okay, but again, then go back to the drawing board in that area. And as you get better at that, you will get better at that. It's it comes with everything, you know, it comes with everything and every little decision that's made. I love that you're talking about stacking wins, like over the course of the day, how many times you trust your intuition and then you know, progress on to the next chapter or thing or whatever. Looking back and being honest about that and feeling really good about it, acknowledging yourself for that. Hey, I really gave myself this space and trusted myself with my intuition on this, and it worked out. So acknowledging and having awareness about these wins.

Samantha Pruitts 46:30

Yeah, for sure, for sure. Strengthen that highway, that super highway to it. And lastly, I would say separate intuition from anxiety. You know, that's a little bit of that, like how what would love do, right? So anxiety is fear-based, right? It's it's you know, fight or flight or something. So anxiety is, I would say, loud, it's repetitive, it's like future focused, like what if, like doomsday, you know, like, oh,

Anxiety And Numbness Versus Intuition

Samantha Pruitts 46:52

if I do this thing. And as we talked about in the beginning of this conversation, it's like love and light and intuition are at a pace of calm and ease and everything's okay. And I would just say, like, it has your well-being in mind. If if a voice or an energy or something sounds like like a panic or a must-do or take action, you know, like if it feels frenzied or any of that, that's not a place of love. Like that's not the frequency, that's not the space the well-being lives in that I think we naturally and our intuitive our highest self operates from. So check that, you know, if you've got this anxiousness, this must do, or like you had mentioned that person, or there's, you know, people we know, or I did, like when I was buying that ticket, I was like, I gotta get this ticket now. Like, yeah, and it's like, hold up, right? So am I operating from anxiety, or am I, you know, does this feel tight and urgent, or or does it feel like, yeah, it's quiet, it's steady, certainty, you know.

Polly Mertens 47:56

Exactly. On the other end of the anxiety spectrum, you know, if you feel a numbness, that is also not good. Because it means that you've sort of checked out and you're gonna make the decision or do the thing based on not really doing the work to be connected to your own truth instinct and move forward, right? And you will see people, especially in very hard situations. I have also watched a lot of this lately, where they are just checked out. I don't know, you guys decide. I don't know, whatever. This whole like whatevering. That's that's a no-go.

Samantha Pruitts 48:36

That's giving away your power, yeah. And and some of that could be like they're afraid of making the decision, being the one to make the decision. What you were starting to say, I was thinking is about like they don't have enough information, you know. Like if if there's just no clarity and you don't feel one way or the other, if you just sort of feel in the middle, like perfect, wait, yeah, get some more information. Yeah, I I would think, but what you're talking about is pointing to something different, so that's important too. Damn, girl. What else? Good morning. Nope, that's good for doing just another day in earth school here. Lesson one-on-one on intuition. And I'm just gonna, my my one thing on the back end of this is the thing that it was in the beginning of this, and that's good judgment comes from bad judgment. You know, so you know, make some of those, and then small wins, good good judgment comes from like strengthening that muscle,

Final Takeaways And Find Your Awesome

Samantha Pruitts 49:29

you know, learning what intuition feels like for you and and being coming from love. So, how about you? What's your one thing?

Polly Mertens 49:36

Just give yourself the gift of the pause and the breath, right? Like it takes a freaking second. No, and nobody even needs to notice what you're doing, like you can do it in any environment. I've done it in very high-stakes business negotiations, really, like you know, and I'm like, okay, nobody really knows what I'm doing right now, but I'm gonna be meditating over here because I'm getting crazy. I need to just keep myself calm. You know what I mean? So, like, take the pause, take the breath, or just or leave the room and hide in the bathroom. That's all that works too.

Samantha Pruitts 50:14

For sure. I'm like, hi, Jacked, I'll be back.

Polly Mertens 50:17

Bye.

Samantha Pruitts 50:17

Yeah, yeah. And so I hope you'll take on some of these things that we've shared with you. Practice this, like bring this into your life, you know, the journaling, the speaking with other people, you know, pausing if you're, you know, triggered, or if you're you've got that something that feels like it's compelling you to do something. It's like, no, love and you know, lightness, they don't come from an urgency. They never do, right? They're all about everything, all is well. Is like when I go into my meditation and I ask for wisdom from my guys, first answer, always the first. It's like, really? That's the first answer every time is all is well. I'm like, okay, got that memo. Like, literally, as I write it on my jar, I'm like, okay, anything all is well. Okay, it's like they want me to say that first, and then we can go into your answer. Like, yeah.

Polly Mertens 50:59

Um, you know, that's just the you might have to tattoo that on your wrist.

Samantha Pruitts 51:03

I I've already got, I mean, I've heard it so many times. So I'm getting the memo. Yes, my dear. All right, what do you want to tell them that we always tell them?

Polly Mertens 51:16

Oh gosh, how how all of ours, me included, messy and crazy, and however your life looks, it's not that damn important. It's how it feels.

Samantha Pruitts 51:27

How it feels, amen. And every day is your opportunity to find your awesome.