-2.jpeg)
Anatomy Of Leadership
Leaders, visionaries, and changemakers, I'm thrilled to introduce our new podcast, "The Anatomy of Leadership," a series that delves deep into the essence of purpose-driven leadership.
As your host, I'll guide you through a journey of discovery—revealing how effective leadership can significantly alter the trajectory of our teams, organizations, and the world at large.
We'll examine topics like:
- Self-Mastery
- Caring for Others
- Influence
- Intention
- Cause and Purpose
Anatomy Of Leadership
Cause and Purpose with Brian Jaudon
Discover the nuanced art of leadership and the transformative power of coaching as Brian Jaudon, the visionary behind Pisgah Coaching Institute, joins me in a captivating dialogue. His unique blend of internal family systems with the five stages of gift development has revolutionized the way we approach nurturing our intrinsic leadership qualities. Through his stories and experiences, you'll gain a deeper understanding of how to sense and attune to an individual's essence, a skill that Brian has perfected over his extensive career. This episode promises to leave you with a profound appreciation for the potential within each of us to lead and inspire.
Life's journey is filled with unexpected turns, and in our conversation, we traverse through these serendipitous moments that shape our paths. I recount how a chance encounter profoundly altered the career of a hospice care regulator, and we reflect on how our work and the people we meet are possibly predestined to guide us towards our true calling. From the evolution of rigid thinkers to balanced leaders, we explore the ways in which mentoring and coaching can unlock one's ability to influence and achieve harmony in both personal and professional realms.
Wrapping up this episode, I invite you to explore the concept of 'Pisgah sight,' a perspective that turns the impossible into the possible. We delve into the significance of recognizing and honoring your unique gifts and how to utilize them in service of a greater vision. As we reflect on the essence of a 'full-lived life' and the symphony of one's life song, you'll be inspired to ponder whether you are actively contributing to the melody that resonates with your deepest passions. Join us for an episode that promises not just to enlighten but also to embolden you to be the change you wish to see.
Everything rises and falls on leadership. The ability to lead well is fueled by living your cause and purpose. This podcast will equip you with the tools to do just that Live and lead with cause and purpose. And now author of the book the Anatomy of Leadership and our host, chris.
Speaker 2:Como. Hello and welcome to the Anatomy of Leadership. Our guest today is Brian Jadon. He is the founder of the Pisgah Coaching Institute, and so it's based in Western North Carolina and the beautiful mountains of Western North Carolina, I should say and he teaches and mentors coaches in many different disciplines, and he uses a blended methodology for whole system coaching, all in the service to clarification and fulfillment of a vision. Brian's coaching system incorporates core principles that the internal family systems, ifs model, as well as his innovative five stages of gift development and mapping your internal influence models. You could, of course, learn more about Brian's coaching institute at piscacoachingcom, and we'll put that link. Brian, it's so good to have you.
Speaker 3:Thanks, chris, always a pleasure.
Speaker 2:Brian, what did I leave out that maybe you want our audience to know about you?
Speaker 3:Well, I think you covered it well. I've been a coach for about 25 years and I guess you could say I'm entering the mentor phase of my career and starting to think about legacy and what I'm leaving behind.
Speaker 2:Well, and I'm honored that I could call you my coach at an earlier part in my career and it's so good to get reconnected with you. But before I kind of jump in, brian, what's your superpower? I started to ask this to our guests early on and then I left it out in the last couple of podcasts and a couple of listeners said you need to go back and ask people that. So I'm like, oh, I definitely got to ask Brian that.
Speaker 3:Yeah, so I mean this. You know the whole question is near and dear to my heart, Chris. As you know, I mean a big part of my coaching methodology is helping people discover and develop their gifts or their innate abilities. I would say my primary gift as a coach is that I can really sense the essence of any particular individual If I really kind of attune in and one of the core competencies of my coaching methodology is attunement. But if I'm really attuned, I can sense the essence of a person, often when they don't have access to that themselves. And so I find that if I can really link in with the essence of who they are and align with that, that becomes almost like a tuning fork for all our coaching work together. So, and I guess you could say you know their essence, their higher self, their, you know the aspects of themselves that they don't even necessarily see or have access to, and I'm sort of that's part of the me holding space for them, living into the truth and potential of who they are.
Speaker 2:And Brian, I didn't tell you I was going to ask you this, but now that you say it in this way, that is so incredible. Can you look back in the rear view mirror like, even as a young man, could you have a sense? You probably didn't have the words, but can you look back and kind of see that you had some grasp of that throughout your life?
Speaker 3:uh, yes, and, like you said, I didn't have the, the language or even the awareness that that, that I think that, um, you know, even as a kid, probably, uh, having a sense of uh being able to perceive the truth of any situation or um, or or the essence of, you know.
Speaker 3:I mean, I could be sitting in the bank and watch people waiting in line for the teller and sort of tune in almost to kind of the who were they as a child teller and sort of tune in almost to kind of the who were they as a child, you know, and sort of like. If I really sort of put my focus and attention there, I can sort of and, and, and you know, and obviously, when you're in front of someone and they you have, uh, you know, contracted to do some personal development work together, um, you know they're, they're allowing you into a very intimate space and you begin to kind of attune to them, almost on a soul level, I would say so. But yeah, I mean, obviously that's something that I've become more and more, I would say, deliberate and intentional about over the course of my life and career, but I think it's been there for a long time, to your point.
Speaker 2:That's awesome, Brian. Well, Brian, you probably know, because I kind of prepped you for this, but I've been using the framework of my book, the Anatomy of Leadership, throughout this year. I wrote the book as a meta framework for what is leadership, Because I kind of knew that the chapters would only touch the surface of concepts. It's almost like a table of contents or my attempt at a table of contents. I was tired of frustrating people. People come to me and say, Como, you're always reading leadership books, when should I start? And I give them five books and I just see the look on their face. So that's why I wrote the book.
Speaker 2:And when I was thinking, okay, I'm getting to the cause and purpose chapter, who should I talk to? And I think, kind of providentially, you and I reconnected and I looked at you and said, oh man, I've got to have you on the podcast. You know the work that I do in hospice and palliative care. I see and meet people and the only way I know how to describe Brian is like they're strangely drawn to this work and people use this phrase. They'll say I fell in a hospice, almost like they're walking down a road, and some hole was there and they fell into this, like you know, career trajectory. I'm curious does that surprise you, given your work, or does that not surprise you?
Speaker 3:Doesn't surprise me at all, which I think you know, especially once we get really curious about you know why we're here on the planet at this time, in this life, in this body. You know my bias, and I think yours too, chris is that you know we're all here to be of service in some way to each other, all here to be of service in some way to each other. And the more we get curious about what our role is to be of service in the world then the right people cross our path and we start to pay attention. And there are no accidents, as you know the adage goes. And you know, if we really start paying attention, then the right teachers, the right peers, the right influences begin to come into our world and support us in fulfilling what, you know, some call our divine contract in this lifetime. And so I think that's you know I've sort of become that. That doesn't surprise me at all at this stage.
Speaker 5:Thank you to our anatomy of leadership sponsor, deltacarerx. Deltacarerx is also the title sponsor for April and November 2024 leadership immersion courses. Deltacarerx is primarily known as a national hospice, pbm and prescription mail order company. Delta Care Rx is a premier vendor of TCN and provides not only pharmaceutical care but also niche software innovations that save their customers time, stress and money. Thank you, delta Care Rx RX for all the great work that you do in end of life and serious illness care.
Speaker 2:Well, I, we just had um on our podcast. I don't know the sequence of what yours is before or after, but there'll be in the sequence Um. So the lady who is phenomenal, she's one of the most well-known regulatory people and she dates back before hospice was ever a Medicare benefit and I just got inspired to ask the question how on earth did you end up in hospice? She told, told this amazing story that she was sitting next to a man on an airplane and she'd ever talked to people in airplane. And she starts talking to this gentleman and, long story short, he was part of the very initial kind of board that started what became the original kind of national organization of hospice and that's literally she's now retired, although she's still working in her retirement and it started with this serendipitous kind of conversation.
Speaker 2:And I think our industry, our field, would be less than if that really weird, serendipitous, just chance encounter did not occur. And the other weird thing that occurred to me this woman later became the actual head of the state association in North Carolina and she basically became why there was a hospice where I was the longtime CEO, which changed the whole trajectory of my life. So one chance encounter on an airplane not only changed her life and just think of all the other people but of course mine and my family. My kids now want to call North Carolina home as well, and so multiple generations from one chance encounter on an airplane. Does that just make you smile or anything you want to add to that?
Speaker 3:Yeah, I mean I I you know, I've had similar occurrences throughout my life and you know I'm thinking about one person in particular that you know, when I was in my early 30s and really healing from a chronic illness at the time and met a woman named Judith Johnson who became really the most significant person in my life, you know I became a client, a student, an apprentice, ultimately a co teacher. She was a pioneer in the field of trauma resolution and trauma healing. Meeting her changed the trajectory of my life. It helped to reveal my gift as a healer essentially, and you know, life was never the same after that. So, uh, it is amazing to look back and see, you know who, who and what has crossed our path and how how our trajectory is has changed significantly from those from those meetings.
Speaker 2:Well, I'm thinking of the young man I was, brian, when you and I worked together. Um, cause we worked together. Was it the first time or second time? I was at Four Seasons, I think it was a bit of both. And I'm trained as an accountant right, so I'm very left brain dominant, but I could look through the rearview mirror of my life and I believe my ability to tap both sides of my brain or coincide with a better trajectory of happiness in life, I hope a better leader, and so I could. And I could think about some of your coaching sessions and things you're saying now back then and I'm just like what, what is he? But now I have a much deeper understanding.
Speaker 2:And I'll tell you one final thing. And then I want to get into some of these questions. I want ask you the very first leadership book I ever read was Stephen Covey's Seven Habits Changed my life in a lot of different ways. Well, of course, I quote Dr Thayer throughout my leadership book, but Dr Thayer was Stephen Covey's mentor. What is the chances of that? And just, I could tell you several other kind of serendipitous things after that, and you and I could probably keep going.
Speaker 2:And so I'm doing this because I want our listeners to know that this is, this is not chance. In fact, brian, you'll laugh my, my son, my second son, who happens to work in hospice now had never seen Forrest Gump, and so the other night my daughters put it on and he watched it with them. And the very beginning I don't know if I'm a huge I love that movie. It's one of my favorite movies. And the feather floating in the beginning and I said watch that feather because it's very, uh, symbolic of the whole point of the movie. The whole point is are we just feathers kind of bumping along and it's just all chance, or is there some? Is there some destiny about? And so I think that's another way of illustrating what we're poking on. I don't know if you make a comment to that, but I just I love that movie and I think it it it pictorially depicts some things that I think get to what we're talking about here.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I mean, and well, first of all, I'm a huge Tom Hanks fan, but, and Tom Hanks fan but, um, and, and you know, and I the movie of his that I really resonate with is cast away, you know, because his life talk about your life being interrupted and being finding yourself stranded on an Island and then really for him finding kind of really more the meaning of life, you know, as he, as he, as he reentered society. So I love movies as a metaphor and a kind of a way to sort of make sense of life and yeah, I do as well.
Speaker 2:I we have, uh, we have, uh, our producer, jeff and I, we have a library of movie clips. And so people go how do you choose movie clips? All the time I'm like when I'm watching a movie, I'm seeing like leadership lessons all around, and I'll email Jeff and go, oh, we got to get this clip and use it as so we now have a library of those.
Speaker 3:I quote movies all the time in my coaching.
Speaker 2:And also it's because we think in pictures, right, I mean, it's a, it's a really cool way to connect with people. Sometimes it illustrates much better than what we try to do with words and paragraphs and sentences.
Speaker 3:And well, Brian, first off let me ask you, cause I think this is going to be a cool question what inspired yeah, you know, I think I had held the vision for starting a coaching institute for a few years without even realizing it. I think that a couple of reasons. I realized that over the course of my coaching career as I mentioned, I've been coaching for about 25 years I had created a methodology, obviously drawing on other lineages of great thinkers and teachers and pioneers of personal and human development, but you know I had developed I guess you would call a blended methodology for what I call whole system coaching, which is coaching the whole person, not just parts of the kitchen, parts of the, of the of the individual. You know, coaching, like any industry, has a pretty big shadow of the individual.
Speaker 3:You know, coaching, like any industry, has a pretty big shadow and and for me, you know, part of my inspiration was to create an institute where I could train and mentor coaches in a methodology that honored the whole person, because I think there's a lot of coaching that happens in the industry which is, you know, kind of, you know, really encouraging people to excel and to be successful, which is all great, but often any parts of the individual that are not fully on board or enrolled in any change initiative in their life or in the life of their team or organization, are often shamed or judged or or, at worst, you know, the coach tries to annihilate those parts. And you know, one of the things I've discovered is that you know we have to enroll the parts of the individual that may initially present as skeptical, fearful, resistant, because those hold great wisdom and gifts for the individual. If we can befriend those parts and actually find out why they're skeptical, fearful and resistant, the whole system can flourish and prosper if we do that. So I think part of the inspiration was that I see a need for this whole system, coaching approach and honoring the whole person. So that was one of the things I've been passionate about for a long time.
Speaker 2:That resonates with me on so many different levels. Our very first show was with John Locke, who established a coaching practice at Forbis, interestingly, and we talked about kind of his kind of holistic approach that he does. But of course that resonates with me even more deeply because hospice was the first model of healthcare built upon a belief that we are holistic human beings. And so in fact, brian, I'm reflecting. I remember one of your you asked brilliant questions, by the way and you asked me a brilliant question that way back when and I've probably been unpacking it most of the rest of my life which was Chris, what does success really mean for you?
Speaker 2:And it's interesting because I'm most people say I'm probably one of the hardest working people. They know I fully own that, but I think that I think that's been redeemed. There's a better purity about, like, the joy in the work as opposed to just the grunting. I could grunt through more tasks than most people, but it was that wonderful question and I wonder if there probably I love that this is an illustration of the methodology you just talked about, because there probably was a side to me that was skeptical. Yeah, I just got to get this work done, man Right. And that one question is a question that, literally, I've spent years unpacking, after the fact.
Speaker 3:I love that. Yeah, I mean that's you know. Often what I see is that, you know, a big part of a lot of people's experience in life is that they experience what I call this push-pull, that they kind of have one foot on the accelerator and one foot on the brake and they're not really moving at optimal efficiency and speed. And the reason is that there are. They're not fully bought into what they say they're trying to achieve. And so there's this sort of internal, often this internal, conflict, the push pull internally that manifest and is showing up externally and sort of like we, you know, this is who we say we're ready to become and this is what we say we're ready to create. But are we really fully on board with that? And so I think that's part of what we need to get curious about, if there are any aspects of us that are not fully on board. That's where, you know, one of my hundreds of mantras when it comes to this work is when in doubt, be curious.
Speaker 3:And so can we be curious about why it is that sometimes I procrastinate, or sometimes I diminish, or sometimes that I'm not, you know, really fully all in? You know, I mean there's there's one of the books that influenced me is by a man named John Lee, which is called the half lived life. And so am I. Am I am I half in or all in? And if I'm not all in on any given aspect of my life or any given initiative or any given aspiration I might have, why is that? And so I think that's a really important part of um, of the discovery process.
Speaker 3:I remember being co-leading a workshop with a former business partner of mine years ago and one of the gentlemen in there was um, you know, had a uh was was leading a family business, like second or third generation to to take on the family business.
Speaker 3:And we did an exercise around core motivators and what is it that really motivates you to show up and do your best every day? And one of the things that became pretty clear in that exercise was that he wasn't really motivated to take this family business to the next level because he really didn't want to be doing it. He really, but it was out of loyalty to the family. He said I should be doing this, but that really wasn't his heart's desire, that wasn't his passion, that wasn't you could say that wasn't even his destiny. So he had to really come to terms with am I going to stay in the family business, even though this is not where my heart and my passion is out of obligation or loyalty to my family, or is it okay if I really pursue what my dream is? So I just think that's an example of sort of again getting curious about if I'm not showing up fully on a consistent basis.
Speaker 2:What's that about Exactly? What's that about? And can we unpack that? Well, brian, before we get too far? Pisgah Coaching Institute.
Speaker 3:Why the name Pisgah Coaching Institute? Well, you know, I can see Mount Pisgah from my office window, actually, and I've always had a very special relationship to the land here. But that just I felt drawn to that. I mean, you know, I often joke, you know, everything around here is called Pisgah something. I mean, we have the dry cleaners and Pisgah. You know Roto-Rooter. But I really felt drawn to have Pisgah in the name.
Speaker 3:And it wasn't until after I named the institute that I actually looked up Pisgah in the name. And it wasn't until after I named the Institute that I actually looked up Pisgah in the dictionary and said, okay, what does this word mean? And that's really when I discovered that you know, pisgah was the mountain that Moses saw the promised land from and I said, okay, I think there might be something here. And then there's a term called Pisgah site S-I-G-H-T, sight S-I-G-H-T, which is basically kind of seeing the impossible.
Speaker 3:And for me, pisgah coaching means can we somehow make the impossible possible? If we look through a certain lens, we see it as impossible, but if we look through a different lens, can we actually envision that what we've, at least historically, seen is not possible, that actually can come into reality. And so to me, that sort of captured the whole spirit of. I mean, I often say I'm in the miracle business because, you know, one of the things that I feel we're about is to create the conditions for the miracle to happen, and miracles come in many shapes and sizes, but I think a miracle in it, in, in a, in it in, in some way a miracle is something that we didn't believe was possible but now we see is actually able to happen.
Speaker 2:Yeah, wow, I could chase that rabbit. So far about. You know, moses went on top His kind of. His life purpose was kind of leading the people out of the wilderness but he got to see the promised land but not go. Joshua's purpose was to take people into the promised land and take the land. And how multiple life purposes kind of intertwine with one another, sometimes synergistically complement one another. I mean there's just so much cool symbiology there, man we could even talk about, like my experience with the word teleos was actually very similar. But Brighton, I hear often that you interacting with you, you talk about vision just being a centerpiece of your method. What is it about that? Why is that such an important component to your approach?
Speaker 3:Yeah, this dates back, chris, to my experience in my 20s. I was living in inner city, washington DC, working as a journalist at the time, and I had the opportunity to be a part of three different spiritual Christian-based communities at the time. It was really kind of when I look back. I was in seminary for about eight years, without realizing it, and one of the communities that I was exposed to was a community called Church of the Savior, and so part of their theology and approach was that anyone in the community could basically stand up and say I have a vision. So it wasn't necessarily the people in the front of the community, it was anybody in the community could have a vision, and what they would do is they would assign a small group of people to be with that person with the vision, sometimes over a year, and they would meet regularly, they would pray together, they would sit with that person and essentially hold that vision with that individual, and so what began to happen was that these amazing things began to manifest in the world. There was one in particular that I was volunteering at, so I guess someone had a vision that they wanted there to be a state-of-the-art medical infirmary for homeless people in the inner city to have a place to heal and get well, and they raised the money to purchase an abandoned building, three-story abandoned building. Doctors and their families moved in on the third floor. The infirmary was on the second floor and the first floor was the dining room and the chapel and the admin offices and I actually volunteered there when it first opened. But that's just one example of some, again, a miracle that I saw happening and I was like, wow, how is this happening? And I think that experience always stayed with me.
Speaker 3:So part of my method, at the core of my methodology, is what is the vision that you hold or is, in a way, that you're a vessel for? So part of our work, a core part of our work, is to help an individual clarify and articulate the vision that they're here to fulfill and hold, essentially do the same thing, hold space for them, but begin to create what I call internal alignment around that vision and external alignment. So the internal alignment around that vision again are all the parts of them that don't agree with the vision, that are scared of the vision, that are are skeptical of the vision again begin to get curious about why they present that way and what it would require to enroll them in the vision. And then, on the external level, what are the behaviors, the habits, the rituals and the practices that are going to be needed to bring that vision into reality? And that's essentially the methodology to reality. And that's essentially the methodology. So you know, it's really about vision, clarification and fulfillment at the highest level.
Speaker 2:So I'd love you have the cool question, which I think you've asked me multiple times, of what business are you in? Is that a clarifying?
Speaker 3:question to what you were just talking about. It is, it is I mean, and in a way it's sort of like if you can imagine yourself, you know, at a cocktail. It is, it is I mean, and in a way it's sort of like if you can imagine yourself at a cocktail party or a social gathering. That's a favorite question, but I like to for me that question, you can approach that question at multiple levels. You could say, well, I'm in the insurance business, but really, or I'm in the, you know, whatever you might be, but what's underneath that you know.
Speaker 3:Why are you? What is kind of more on a kind of a human spiritual level? You know, again, it get back, it get back. It gets back to vision. It gets back to you know why you're in this life, why you're on the planet at this given time, and how can you be of service. And so if we play with that question a little bit, you know, then I think we can go a few layers down and just again inquire, like at the highest level what is your life about? And to get curious about that.
Speaker 2:And do you find Brian?
Speaker 2:So in my book when I talk about cause and purpose, the way I try to put it into words is that I have clarity by looking through the rearview mirror of asking questions but then living out of the front windshield, my current understanding, like once a year, and I've got a couple of tactics and practices where annually, just keep wrestling with cause and purpose and the best analogy and I got this one from Dr Thayer, number one go to school wherever you are, because you know I think we live in this kind of quick drive-by American fast food go through the drive-through.
Speaker 2:So when I get cause and purpose, then the sky's going to open and it's going to come down to me on some tablet. It's not that way. It's in the living and the wrestling and you go with the clarity you have today and you apply it. And the analogy I use is like someone looking through a telescope and it's kind of blurry and through that living and trying to get clarity it becomes clearer and clearer. Like I'm probably the most clear on my cause and purpose today, certainly much more so than when you and I first knew each other. So would you say that differently or does that resonate with what you've seen in your own coaching.
Speaker 3:Well, I mean, I think we're saying we're probably talking about the same thing, just using a little bit different language, you know? I mean, I think you and I are both attuned to this idea that we're here to be of service, and I think, in some ways, you know our, our work, where, where you know the, the, the universes that you and I each live in, are essentially asking people the same question, which is how are you going to be in service and what does that look like for you? And you know there are a number of books out there now these days Patrick Lencioni and others, the Zone of Genius.
Speaker 3:You probably heard that phrase right, there's the zone of genius. You probably heard that phrase right? So I think Patrick Lencioni has the six ways of being in your genius. The book the Big Leap talks about the four zones. You know, I think it's related to that. It's sort of like you know, I remember a former client and now a peer and a friend of mine. I did a coaching session with him decades ago and it was really about what is the song he's here to sing? He's a musician. So we sort of use that language.
Speaker 3:What's your song? Your life song? And if you're not, what is your song? And are you singing it? And if you're not singing it, why is that? What is your? Song and are you? Singing it? And if you're not singing it, why is that? So I think on some level, you and I are both inviting people into that conversation.
Speaker 2:Another thing that occurs to me I can't remember where I harvested this this past year, but four questions you want to answer with your life is who did I love and who loved me? Was I a good person and did I make a difference? I love. How my perception is like. You just summarized that in living a life of service, that to me would be like the executive summary of those four questions. Does that resonate with?
Speaker 3:you as well it does, and I think that can look very differently depending on the individual. I mean, I think, and sometimes it can be quite subtle, I mean, you know, maybe being of service is to help people see possibility in every situation. You know, maybe it's unconditional love, Maybe it's radical acceptance, you know, because there's so much judgment in the world, you know, maybe it's you know. So I think that there are different ways that we can all be of service and I think that sometimes it's more outward, sometimes it's more inward, Sometimes I mean this kind of connects to the, to the gift work that I do.
Speaker 2:That's exactly what I was about, ready to ask you Like it feels like yeah. So how does gifts kind of fit into your methodology of connects to the gift work?
Speaker 3:that I do. That's exactly what I was about, ready to ask you. It feels like, yeah, so how does gifts kind of fit into your methodology? Well, this is the gifts work I've been developing since about 2009.
Speaker 3:And it was a gift to me from God or the universe, or whatever you want to call it, and I didn't initially see it as a gift, which, by the way, is true with most gifts. We don't see it as, and I didn't initially see it as a gift which, by the way, is true with most gifts. We don't see it as a gift initially. We see it as an intrusion or a burden or something we don't understand.
Speaker 3:But for me, we all have this unique set of abilities that we came into the world with, and part of, again, part of the discovery process is that, once we've clarified our vision that we are a vessel for in this life, uh then we all, you know we can't fulfill our vision without our gifts, and so part of the discovery process, or what are these gifts that I've been given, that I may or may not have really tapped into or given language to or put into practice, and so part of my methodology is inviting people into that gift discovery process and part of the framework is there are five stages of gift development. There's inviting the gifts to make themselves known to us.
Speaker 3:It's that state of I'm ready to know what my gifts are which is one of the most powerful states we can be in is the state of invitation I'm ready to know and then the state of clarifying the gift or the essence of the gift receiving the gift Just because we've been given a gift doesn't mean we've received it.
Speaker 3:And we can only offer our gifts in the world to the extent that we've received them. And then the fourth is honoring the gift. Am I making space in my life and my work and my daily routine for these gifts to be in my world and am I looking for opportunities to give these gifts that I've been given? And then the fifth, offering the gifts in my world, and am I looking for opportunities to give these gifts that I've been given. And then the fifth, offering the gifts in the world. And of course, as in almost every developmental model, we're in multiple stages at a time.
Speaker 3:So you know there are gifts of being gifts of creating gifts of relating, gifts of perceiving. You know there are multiple kinds of gifts, but the gifts are often so subtle that we have traditionally not seen them as gifts. It's sort of like a fish doesn't know it's swimming in water because that's all it's done its whole life. But you know, so part of it is inviting into our awareness what are these gifts that we've been given and how can I use them in service, in fulfillment of my vision? That's a huge piece of the equation.
Speaker 2:You know what One of the wonderful nurses I worked with in the past so quite often can, can other people sometimes more easily see the gift in us than absolutely? Yeah, so a nurse told me which became a gift to me I guess in some respects that's why I'm doing what I'm doing today and she just it was about a gift of communication and energy that I project and I had no clue, and never even had, even in England, that that was part of my essence, to use your word, and the fact that she mirrored that created in the beginning of some level of reflection and self-discovery and what I would say over the years, probably honing and maximizing the potential of that gift, does that resonate Absolutely, and you know, which is why one of the things I encourage everybody that I work with at some point is to email 12 to 15 people who know you well from different walks of life and ask them to tell you what they see as your gifts in one-on-one and or group settings and that language is important.
Speaker 3:So what gifts do you see that I have in one-on-one and or group settings? And to give examples where possible. And what that does is when you start to hear back from and, by the way, it's really good to ask people from different walks of life who you know you from different worlds and then what you'll see is you'll start to see patterns. You'll start to see patterns of people's comments. Wow, three or four people are basically saying the exact same thing, maybe a little bit differently, and then it's hard to deny that we have a particular gift when multiple people are saying you have this ability, Um, so that could. That's a very I call that a gifts 360. That's a very powerful um process.
Speaker 2:That is awesome, brian. Well, brian, what? What final advice do you have to leaders about cause and purpose?
Speaker 3:Uh well, I would say, um, for leaders. I would say for leaders, I would say, speaking of gifts, what is the gift that you're here to bring in your position? You're here, if any leader is in a unique role to have a profound impact on the lives of other human beings. So what is the gift that you're here to bring? It's sort of the singing, the song metaphor. What is the here that you're here to give as a leader at this particular point in time in your life and career, and are you giving it? And if you're not giving it, why is that? And then what is the gift that you're there in that position to receive? Because it goes both ways. So that would be one of the highest level questions that I would love to see leaders reflect on.
Speaker 2:That is so good, brian. Brian, I was debating whether I'd ask you this, but I do think it'd be cool to ask you this right now, because where you and I first got to know one another, I can't remember if I was getting coached by you or if we did this first. I kind of think we did the constellation exercise. Mutual friend coworker who's working with me introduced, you and I, and it's a constellation exercise.
Speaker 2:I've tried to describe it to people, so I'm going to tell you what I tell them and I would love for, in your words, to describe it. And so and I can't remember the first constellation we tried to do, I think it was trying to solve a problem around palliative care and I can't remember the first constellation we tried to do I think it was trying to solve a problem around palliative care. And so I said, what we do it's like an unchoreographed play of which each person will be given a role and we have a wonderful facilitator who asks questions and you will go where the energy moves you and as the constellation rearranges itself, there's this amazing revelation, wisdom, and you will always learn something from it. So how would you describe this constellation exercise thing that you used to have in your toolbox?
Speaker 3:Well, it's still in the toolbox. I bring it out when the timing, the timing is right. But yeah, I mean I love that description. I never explained it the same way twice. But what I would say in this moment is that all human systems, including organizations, have a consciousness. That's the first thing I would say.
Speaker 3:All human systems get get stuck sometimes. Sometimes that's due to trauma. There can be organizational trauma, individual trauma, family trauma, and there are events that can happen in life, including in organizations, that can interrupt the natural flow of systems. All systems, I believe, have a natural desire to flourish and to evolve, and so what the constellation does is it reveals the hidden dynamics of that human system and will actually show you where it's stuck and where what has interrupted the natural movement of the flourishment of that system, and it'll also show you what needs to happen for that system to become unstuck, so it can get back on the path of flourishment.
Speaker 3:So all systems have hidden dynamics and the consolation reveals those hidden dynamics so that you can work with those dynamics in a way, so they can, you know, be where repairs are needed. Repairs can happen where conversations are needed. Those can happen where honoring is needed. The honoring can happen. Where something needs to be grieved, that can be grieved, grieved, that can be grieved. So it's a beautiful, beautiful system and method for allowing and facilitating the natural evolution of systems.
Speaker 2:That's so good. I'm so glad I asked you that because I've tried to explain it to people. So now having your own words and my words, that would be a good use of this podcast. Brian, thank you. Thank you for how you're using your unique giftedness to make the world a better place. Brian, thank you, thank you for how you're using your unique giftedness to make the world a better place. I really do appreciate you and I think, as I'm getting older and grayer, I have a deeper and deeper appreciation of you.
Speaker 3:Thanks so much, chris, always a pleasure.
Speaker 2:Absolutely. And to our listeners. At the end of each episode we always share a quote and a visual that possibly might create a brain bookmark, a thought prodder about our podcast subject. So just to further your learning and growth and thereby hopefully your leadership, and hopefully it sticks sticks in our brains and in Brian's case, I hope it maybe plants a seed that flourishes in a whole new way, Be sure you subscribe to our channel, Anatomy of Leadership. Don't want you to miss an episode. If you get a chance, check out the book on Amazon. Also, we're going to put a link to Brian's to the Pisgah Coaching Institute. Tell your friends and family and coworkers about Anatomy of Leadership. It's easy for us to rail against the world and be frustrated by things, but let's be the change we wish to see in the world. Thanks for listening to the Anatomy of Leadership, and here's our brain bookmark to close today's show what is your life song?
Speaker 5:are you singing it? If not, why is that? Thank you.
